Shoulder strap for stihl weed eater

I got married yesterday and we're both North Africa nerds. Her vows contained a lot of Rommel references. Bet you can guess what mine were based on... Thought I'd share my vows with you all.
Person I love less than the Matilda but more than others,
I spent a LOT of time thinking about what I was going to say when I stood up here with you in front of everyone we hold dear. I know you think I waited until the last minute, but in all honestly, I've been mentally writing this for months, despite not having anything concrete down on paper.
In researching how to write wedding vows, the one piece of advice I kept coming across was to read the vows of others and to use that as a template for saying what one wants to say about your future partner and your vision of your shared life together.
So I read wedding vows. Lots of them. Some were better than others. But none of them really resonated with me.
Then, randomly, it hit me. It was going to start as a goofy, nerdy joke at the beginning of my vows, but the more I thought of it, the more I realized it was already the perfect template. So if you'll allow me to be a bit of a dork for a moment...
Perrett before Fletcher
Matilda II before Valentine
40-41 North Africa campaign before 42-43 North Africa campaign
These words are the first oath of fealty to Queen Matilda the Second of the Desert, not actually contained in “The Matilda” by Bryan Perrett. The work was made from the effort of ten entities; H.R.B Foote, the Matilda II, American Lend-Leased equipment, Bryan Perrett, Colonel Jerram, 4th Royal Tank Regiment, 7th Royal Tank Regiment, Australians, the Matilda’s dummy thicc armor, and United Nations; each having their own core ideal and associated oaths.
Well, I'm an entity, so regardless, here, today, I make these oaths to you:
Like Foote, I will remember.
I will remember my love for you. I will remember your love for me. I will remember being one of only two tankers to get the Victoria Cross.
When we inevitably disagree, I will remember that the conflict isn't you vs me, it's US (not the United States) against the Problem.
...and I will remember the day we met.
I will remember standing in the cupola having a little battle with an Italian where we were trying to out-offensive-joke the other.
It was my turn, and I told a sexist joke and you overheard. You then proceeded to walk over, punch me in the shoulder and call me a dick.
Who could have known that that tiny act of simple assault would lead to all this? I feel like I won that battle, despite my clearly debilitating shoulder injury, and my prize was the love of my life, my best friend, and my partner.
Like the Matilda II, I will be there when I'm needed.
I will be there for you when you have a rough day. I will be there for you when you have a good day.
I will be there for you when you're sick. I will be there for you when you're healthy.
I will be there for you when you need help with a battle; a difficult foe; a difficult campaign. I will be there for you always.
Like the American Lend-Leased equipment, I will seek freedom.
The Yanks sought freedom not only for themselves, but for others.
I will seek YOUR freedom.
I will not attempt to control you. Instead, I will seek your freedom to make your own choices, and I will support you in those choices even if I disagree with them.
Like Perrett, I will seek truth.
I will be honest with you in all things. I will not lie or mislead you. I will have the difficult conversations openly and honestly. I will put random anecdotes that really can’t be verified into my history book.
Like Colonel Jerram, I will speak MY truth.
I will be a Smokey Stover. I will shout that you’re incompetent. I will share my idea to drive at half speed all the time to increase readiness.. and I will share praise for you while being modest about myself.
Like the 4th Royal Tank Regiment, I will seek self-mastery.
You have always pushed me to be better, and more than that, you make we WANT to be better.
And so I will work in Eritrea with a squadron with no spare parts.
I will always strive to improve myself to be a better friend, partner, and husband to you.
Like the 7th Royal Tank Regiment, I will reach my potential.
I will not be lazy. I will do what needs doing. I will not exceed half speed I will push my own bounds to ensure you and our children have the quality of life you all deserve. Unless that means moving at more than a snail’s pace.
Like the Australians, I will seek justice.
I will seek justice for you.
If others are flammable, I will cram a flamethrower in the turret of a Matilda. When you have something that needs a depth charge, I will strap a Hedgehog to the back of a Matilda.
And so help me I will march right back into some shitty Pacific island and tell them to not use Comfort Women and that they'd better pony up and get some consenting bitches or something, and then set them on fire with a Frog.
Like the Matilda’s dummy thicc armor, I will protect.
I will protect you and our children from danger. I will protect you and our children from harm. I will step in front of you when there's a threat. I will be your rock when you're scared. I will be your shield when you're vulnerable. and if it comes down to it, I will lay down my own life to save yours.
Like the United Nations, I will unite.
I will put US (Not the United States) above ME (Not the Middle East) I will prioritize our family above all else. I will ensure my work doesn't interfere with family affairs.
I will remain by your proverbial side through thick and thin; through blood and water; through rain and sun; through rich and poor; through sickness and health; through good times and bad; until death should part us.
You are my best friend, my partner, my love, my life, and my wife from this day until the last.
But also still second to my love for the Matilda.

Hi! I'm off to Spain early hours Sat. I ordered this bag (shown in pic) before realising its slightly bigger than ryanairs size allowance. It's really squishy and I'm pretty confident I could squeeze it into the sizer at the airport, but I'm a bit anxious that I'll be charged. Has anyone ever flown with this bag/same sized bag and can suggest whether I take a different one or whether it'll be fine? Thanks! (Ryanair allowance is 40x20x20)

PART EIGHT HUNDRED AND FORTY-TWO
[Previous Chapter] [The Beginning] [Patreon+2]
Friday
Thomas had no idea how Miss Webber did it, but by the time his phone pinged with her message less than ten minutes later, he was directed to the resort’s front entrance, where a town car would be waiting for him.
Thomas had showered, shaved and packed his duffle within the seven minutes he’d said he needed and had spent the next few minutes moving silently through the resort. As a licenced bodyguard (albeit an out-of-work one), he still had a valid multi-state CCW licence for all of his weapons, some of which he wore, and others were stashed in his bags.
The first thing he’d done after leaving the apartment he’d shared with Donald with everything he owned in garbage bags was go to the nearest army surplus store and buy himself an oversized duffle and shoulder pack. The guy behind the counter barely glanced at his CCW licence, already knowing a war vet when he saw one. Thomas also loaded up on ammunition and spare knives because one could never be too careful. He was offered a substantial discount for his service, but he declined and paid for everything with a swipe of his card.
Later that day, he had booked into a hotel where he’d considered his next move. There were a couple of brothers from the military who had started a security firm in Chicago that would welcome him with open arms. He also had a few favours owed to him inside the military, provided those people were still in the service. He hadn’t exactly had a lot of downtime to chase up old friends working for the Portsmiths.
In the end, after drinking half a bottle of vodka, he decided an overseas vacation would be the best thing for his frayed nerves. Especially when he thought if he stayed, he might be running into Sam … or the monster that was watching over him. It had to be a monster. Before that day, he’d only ever believed in the two-legged kind of monsters. Even as a kid, he was convinced everything had a weakness and could be killed.
And every time he convinced himself he’d been drugged into thinking it (which only took seconds because the concept was insane), he’d look at his chest or a reflection of his chest, see the lie for what it was and freak out all over again.
Now wasn’t the time to think about that. So he’d covered his chest in a black t-shirt and pulled on olive-green cargo pants and combat boots. He knew it was a long way from what he would be expected to wear around Mr Portsmith, but the clothes he’d been assigned had remained with Donald right along with all his electronics since they’d come with the job.
Sure enough, a dark green sedan with tinted windows was waiting for him in the loading bay with a driver standing at the back door. “I’ll sit up front with you,” he said as he tossed the duffle and his pack across the back seat.
“Very well, sir,” the driver said, shutting the back door while Thomas opened the front passenger door for himself.
The drive across the island to Grand Bahama International Airport took under five minutes, and Thomas knew for the price Portsmith Electronics had paid for this fancy cab fare, he could’ve saved them that money and run that distance in thirty. Maybe longer since he was lugging his overweight kit and his days of hauling ass while fully loaded up were a decade behind him, but still, he shook his head at the excessive expense.
A woman in a sharply pressed flight attendant’s uniform stood at the foot of the stairs of a seven-windowed jet with Reno Air Express painted across the sides in green when they pulled onto the tarmac. As soon as the car drew to a halt, Thomas removed his seatbelt and climbed out of the passenger seat before the driver could reach the door. He went to the back door and hauled out his gear, throwing his duffle onto his shoulder and carrying the backpack by the straps out of habit since that left his strongest arm free to handle the rifle he wasn’t currently carrying. Some things were just ingrained like that.
“Mister Cole,” she said as he approached her.
“Yes,” Thomas answered, snapping back into the professional façade he’d been using for almost a decade. He walked past her and climbed the stairs, ducking inside. As his eyes scanned the nineteen seats of the small cabin, he found himself biting the inside of his cheek in amusement. For the last nine years, he’d been flying in private jets set up for those who had more zeroes in their bank accounts than some small countries. After all that time, it was something of a step back to go from that to a basic commercial model.
“We’ll be taking off just as soon as you’re buckled in, sir,” the flight attendant said, hauling the stairs up and locking them into place. “Would you like me to stow your bags?”
Thomas shook his head, tossing his duffle across the two seats on the opposite side of the aisle from the pair he claimed for himself. As ingrained as it was for him to keep his gear with him wherever possible, it was just as hammered in to put himself as close as possible to the cockpit and the door in case of a problem.
Besides, with the equipment he had in that duffle, there was no way she could lift it. The two chairs groaned and sank under the weight. It was why he’d gone to the army surplus store to buy it. That sucker could carry over four hundred pounds without breaking if it had to. In comparison, the commercial versions fell apart just thinking about triple-figured weights.
After clipping the seatbelt through the handles and under the duffle to secure it to the seat, he threw his smaller pack in the overhead storage and took his front aisle seat. He strapped himself in, then watched the flight attendant do likewise in a rear-facing seat beside the cockpit door. She pressed a button on the wall that probably notified the pilot they were ready, and within seconds, they were taxiing onto the main runway.
“Where will we be putting down?” he asked just as soon as the jet leveled out and both he and the attendant unbuckled for comfort.
“We’ll be flying directly to the Pensacola International Airport and landing just before seven-thirty, sir. A car will be waiting for you there.” She stood up with a smile. “Are you hungry, sir? A hot breakfast has been supplied by one of the local hotels.”
Thomas tried really hard not to let his surprise show. Clearly, whoever wrote Marvel’s Pepper Potts character had met Miss Webber! Within ten minutes, she had a car and jet and a hot breakfast ready to go … on an island soooo not set up for any of that!
Note to self … stay on Miss Webber’s good side, Thomas reminded himself, for perhaps the millionth time since first meeting the scary executive assistant that had not been given her position to sit on the boss’ knee and look pretty. Tucker Portsmith and Martin Laurier were dangerous in their own right, but Miss Webber was like so many staff sergeants he’d worked with. Fuck with her at your own peril.
“Breakfast would be great, thank you.”
The woman beamed and moved down the seats, stopping in the hallway to open some manner of bag that had been strapped into the seat like a passenger.
She returned with a large tray with two domed lids. “Apple juice or coffee, sir?” she asked as he lifted the first lid and breathed in the sausages and scrambled eggs on toast.
He paused mid-whiff and suspiciously lifted his eyes to her.
“We were informed of your beverage preferences, sir.”
It was more than a preference. Thomas was allergic to citrus fruits. It was why he always carried at least two epi-pens on him, even though he was able to use the excuse of carrying it for Miss Geraldine since she had her own food allergies. He huffed without a word and went to work cleaning up the meal before him.
“Also, in case you wish to change before our arrival…” the woman stood up and made her way to the rear of the plane, returning with a sealed garment bag. “I believe these are your measurements.”
Thomas fought hard to curtail his reaction. Jesus Christ! A car, a jet, a breakfast that took his allergies into consideration, AND a semi-fitted suit?! The fuckin’ US military isn’t this organised!
It was novel to be the sole focus of the flight attendant. Normally he was the muscle that the plane staff ignored in favour of the family, so having her offer a range of beverages and even a few simple snacks like he was a VIP, despite the journey only taking a little over two hours, was a treat.
The ascent and descent were the most time-consuming parts of the flight, and about five minutes before he’d need to be buckled in for the second time, Thomas stood up and took the suit that had been draped over the back of the second set of seats.
“I’m about to get changed,” he said over his shoulder, more to give the woman time to do whatever the hell she needed to do. It wasn’t as if he was shy, though he’d react badly to being touched without being asked. That was a no-go.
He moved to the centre of the plane still facing the rear, unzipped the garment bag and unhooked it from the shoulders. As he expected, there was an undershirt, a long-sleeved grey silk shirt and a dark jacket with matching silk tie. Behind it were the long pants. “I assume there’s shoes somewhere too?” The combat boots he was presently wearing didn’t really cut it.
“Yes, sir. I have them in the overhead storage.”
With a nod of approval, he untied each shoe and kicked them off, then wedged his knees into the armrests on either side of the narrow aisle and hauled his t-shirt over his head.
Twenty minutes later, after taxiing into the private hangars, the stairs were lowered, and Thomas strode down them. In his left hand, he held the duffle over the thin rail that most would need for balance, while his right held the smaller backpack the same way. He still hadn’t allowed the hostess to kill herself trying to lift his duffle, and the pack offered him a small measure of counterbalance. He wouldn’t allow either to crease his suit. At the foot of the stairs stood two men, who broke apart as he descended with their hands up to relieve him of his bags.
One look at their sizes, and Thomas told them to switch.
“Why?” the much smaller of the two asked.
“There’s over a hundred and forty pounds in that duffle.” He knew that because it had cost him a small fortune to fly it to the Bahamas. “Are you good with lifting that kind of dead weight?” Tiny Tim? the snarky part of his brain added.
The only person of minute stature who Thomas had seen hold his own without batting an eye was a little blond bullet from Texas who’d been temporarily attached to his unit back in '03. Kelsey could also toss the biggest of them on their asses too, but this guy clearly wasn’t him.
“One forty?” the bigger guy repeated, then looked at his colleague. But instead of switching as Thomas suggested, that guy took the small pack and slung it onto one shoulder, then went the other side where both men shared the weight of the duffle between them back to the SUV parked a short distance away.
Thomas shook his head at them. They were both in their mid-twenties. The bigger of them should’ve been able to handle that duffle on his own for the twenty feet they had to cover to reach the car. Wherever Miss Webber dug them up from, they clearly weren’t former military.
But then, that’s what he was there for.
He followed them to the car, almost laughing when the bigger one put the duffle down (forcing his smaller companion to just about face-plant) and moved quickly to open the rear passenger door for him. “I sit in the front, bud. You take the back.” He actually preferred to drive, but that wouldn’t be up to him. Not when the company was paying him four-fifty an hour for however many hours he was needed.
* * *
((Author's note: I don't know how many of you are aware of this, but Reddit is attempting to force out 3rd party apps at the end of this month, and many, many sites across Reddit are undertaking a self-imposed posting ban from 12th June to the 14th June.
I'm talking very big hitters as well as little ones are joining this fight. I don't personally agree with Reddit's decision to charge each of the 3rd party companies 20 million dollars a year to maintain their programs either, so for those three days, I'll be withholding BtH posts in solidarity with the heavy hitters. Every little bit helps.
I'm not sure if it will only affect one or two posts yet, depending on if the timing of the 'strike' is all going to happen at the same time around the world or if everywhere is doing it according to their local timetable. I'll be watching some of the bigger AU sites to find out.
I hope you all understand my reasons, and I'll be back soon after that, as per usual.))
((All comments welcome. Good or bad, I'd love to hear your thoughts 🥰🤗))
I made a family tree/diagram of the Mystallian family that can be found here
For more of my work including WPs: Angel466 or an index of previous WPS here.
FULL INDEX OF BOB THE HOBO TO DATE CAN BE FOUND HERE!!

The bra that fits is an Elomi Brianna cage plunge bra in size 40JJ. I love how it fits and looks, but those cute straps on the top only go with so many outfits. That being said, I need something that fits exactly like that bra, but doesn’t have the straps on top.
This is the first bra I’ve ever worn where the gore actually tacks. I had never tried a plunge bra before, but I think it’s the style I need. I always have gore problems and I think it’s because it comes up too high.
Other bras I tried are the Elomi Charley plunge, Elomi Matilda plunge, and Goddess Kiera
The Charley almost fits right, but I think the gore is a little wider than the Brianna and it cuts into my breast just a little bit. I would probably just buy this one, but I don’t know if I could wear it for a full day. I don’t like the material it’s made from, it feels a bit scratchy. This one does feel a little snug, but I do have a bra extender coming. Maybe that will improve the feel?
The Matilda fits ok everywhere except the top of the cups. They seem a bit loose and there is extra room there. The straps wanted to slide off my shoulders for some reason.
The Kiera fits pretty bad. The gore doesn’t tack and there is weird gaping on the sides even though the cups seem to fit ok. I got this one in a 42M/42J. I ended up sister sizing to a 40JJ for the others I tried because the band liked to slide around over time when on the loosest hooks. It stops doing that on the tightest hooks.
Elomi bras
Goddess Kiera
What should I try?

The episode resumed on a shot of the dark and dank and craggy underground cave, water drips echoing in the background as the camera panned to the left. It stopped on a small and sudden burst of bubbles, then cut in closer as Geoff broke the surface with a spluttering cough. Scarlett joined him a moment later.
"Where's Anne Maria?" Geoff wondered once he saw no sight of her.
He got his answer when Anne Maria resurfaced, Scarlett apparently on top of her head. "Do I look like a lifeboat?!" the jersey girl grunted and threw Scarlett off of her.
"We had no idea where we'd land. It's not our fault," Geoff said.
"And besides, we're separated from Dave and Molly," Scarlett replied. "Finding them will be beneficial if we want to make it out of here alive." As she spoke, a pair of glowing eyes figure appeared in the background, crawling down the rock.
"I do not want to die, and I definitely don't want anyone else to," Anne Maria said.
"My point exactly," Scarlett stated… just before the shadowy figure tackled her underwater.
"Scarlett!" Geoff shouted in worry. "Anne Maria, she's gone! What do we do?"
"Get out of this before we get dragged down," Anne Maria responded before they swam to shore.
\
The scene flashed to the wrecked mine cart still on dry land, which had crashed against a thick and massive stalagmite. The camera panned to the left onto the fallen bodies of Molly and Dave. The germaphobe got to his feet with an active flashlight still in his hands and groaned as he looked around.
He immediately spotted the indie girl nearby and gasped. "Molly!" he exclaimed, running over to her. "Get up!" he added, tapping Molly on the side of the head with the flashlight and groaning when he didn't get a response.
With a swift cry of "Wake up already!" he kicked the girl on her side, who immediately groaned in pain and got to her feet.
"Dave…" Molly mumbled and frowned. "Did you just kick me?"
"I had to get you up somehow," Dave admitted.
"I can see that," Molly agreed.
"Now come on," Dave said, Molly's eyes widening as he unknowingly rose about a foot into the air. "We have to find the others and the statue!" It was then that he noticed his sudden height change, and along with Molly, he looked at his feet.
The camera zoomed out a step, revealing that Dave was now standing on the head of a giant hairless gopher that had just popped out of the ground. They screamed and ran away in fear as the gopher rose up even more and roared at them.
\
The camera cut back to Trent and Scott running as their mutant gopher continued chasing them down a tunnel. Just then, Trent tripped on one of the planks laid out for mining cart tracks, and tumbled over Scott, sending them both to the floor.
The gopher caught up to them, much to their fright, and began sniffing at them. It recoiled with a whimper afterwards.
"Why is it doing that?" Trent asked as he and Scott got off the floor.
Scott looked at the gopher. "Their eyes are glued shut, so it had to follow us by smell."
"I took a shower this morning," Trent reminded the devious.
Scott lifted his right armpit and sniffed it. "I never do that, so my armpits are pretty skunky."
"Gross," Trent grimaced.
The gopher went back to squealing at the two Rats, and while Trent took a step back, Scott didn't do the same.
"You don't like the smell of my armpits?" Scott smirked at the gopher and took a step forward. "Too bad, because it's never going away!" He raised his arms, and moved towards the gopher, who scurried away in a second.
"Having a clean stench is important," Trent said as he stepped up beside him, "but since it saved us, I'll ignore it this time." He patted him on the back, to which Scott grinned back at.
\
The camera panned across another cave, from an entrance tunnel on the right, past a large pile of toxic waste barrels, and on to Scarlett lying on the ground with a small puddle of water near her face, next to some steps carved into a higher level of stone.
She coughed up a bit of water then looked up. "Where am I?" she asked.
The shot rather ominously panned up to a familiar figure sitting on what looked like a cobbled-together set of bunk beds atop the plateau. A few mutant gophers were on the platform with him, but a couple more started to surround Scarlett.
"I will have no problem harming you myself if you do not back off!" Scarlett threatened the gophers, and one of them got hit by a familiar shoe.
"Step away from her, gophers!" the figure said, stepping out to reveal himself as Max.
"Max!!! What are you doing here?" Scarlett flabbergasted.
Max put his shoe back on and focused on the brainiac. "I have come to enact my revenge on you fools!"
All Scarlett could do was roll her eyes and facepalm.
\
A flash took the scene back to DJ, Sierra, and Sammy running through the mine. "What's taking them so long to catch up?" Sierra asked.
Sammy looked around the shaft. "We probably should've marked where we came from. I think we might be lost from them!"
They were interrupted by the gopher that Scott scared off scampering past them.
"There you guys are!" Trent's voice called, and the three Rats looked in the direction the voice came from.
Scott and Trent then appeared on the scene. "We were almost killed by that gopher, but luckily, my armpits saved the day!" Scott boasted.
"Your armpits?" DJ muttered confused.
"He doesn't shower very often," Trent answered.
"Disgusting," Sammy winced. "Anywho, we should get going since we're reunited!"
Suddenly, five pairs of mutant gopher hands shot up out of the ground under the Rats, grabbing them by their ankles. "Unless they do that," Sammy sighed just before the gophers pulled them screaming into the earth.
\
"Why did you bring me here, and how were you able to return after your departure?!" Scarlett asked as the scene cut back to her and Max.
"I "borrowed" a canoe from a relative of mine and decided to swim back to the island after rewatching the past episodes and doing a bit of research on gophers in order to seize control of them," Max explained, using air quotes on borrowed.
"I highly doubt you were able to get these creatures under your control," Scarlett doubted. "You obviously had help from someone."
Max griped in annoyance. "If you must know, I encountered that clone from last season and decided to bring him along as he's a very intimidating fellow."
It was then that the second figure landed in the middle of the room. Scarlett widened her eyes and Max yelped and yelled "E-Clone! Do not sneak up on me!"
"Did you have the Ezekiel clone capture me so I would be one of your sidekicks," Scarlett followed up.
"With your super-advanced brain, who'd pass you up?" Max responded, making Scarlett and E-Clone frown at the super villain.
\
The scene cut to a drop of water landing in a small puddle, soon followed by two sets of feet that ran through it. The camera zoomed out to show them belonging to Molly and Dave, the two Maggots panting as they ran down the tunnel.
"I'm starting to feel the signs of chemical exposure," Molly moaned. "Fever and nausea."
Seconds later, Dave's arm badge beeped and turned red, earning a surprised look from both teens. "Five minutes left," Dave said. "Let's not die here." Molly's badge changed soon after, but they ignored it as they were in the same predicament.
"I see Dave and Molly!" the voice of Anne Maria called out. The scene zoomed out to show her and Geoff meeting up with the two.
"Anne Maria! Geoff! Nice to have you here," Dave told them. "But where's Scarlett?"
"She got captured by some cave monster," Geoff answered.
"We have to find her!" Molly declared.
"We should leave these dumb packs before they slow us down," Dave added, moving to take the straps off his shoulders.
The sudden crackle and whine of a loudspeaker turning on gave him pause however. "Those packs of pain stay on until I tell you otherwise!" Chris told them. "Or your whole team is disqualified! Dis-qual-i-fied!"
"YOU BETTER NOT LET US US DIE IN HERE!" Anne Maria screamed the moment the message ended.
"Uhh, I'm more of a watcher than a saver," Chris replied. The loudspeaker shut off again, and the four Maggots shared an infuriated look.
"My answer is no!" Scarlett's voice was heard.
"That's Scarlett over there," Geoff said, pointing forward. "Let's roll, dudes." He took off first, and his teammates quickly followed after.
\
The scene flashed back to the entrance to the cave that E-Clone, Max, and Scarlett were in as the four remaining Maggots ran in as well.
"Whatever you want to accomplish, I have no interest in assisting you," Scarlett informed Max, a few mutant gophers standing nearby.
"Can one of you get these gophers off of us!" the voice of Scott asked, causing the camera to quick-pan over to him. Though his team's jar of fireflies was still on DJ's head, the shot zoomed out to reveal that he was dangling with his heavy pack in the jaws of a mutant gopher standing on its haunches on a pile of barrels; another outward zoom revealed the rest of his team in a similar state next to him.
"Great. Now our chances of getting that statue is harder," Dave complained.
"So all of you have come for your golden statues?" Max asked everyone around him.
"Of course we did!" Sierra said. "And why not give my team our statue before the Maggots got here?"
"Simple. I take pleasure in making stuff harder for everybody around me, and seeing you hung up by the gophers is delightful," Max explained. "I told you I would get my revenge."
"Is he always this eccentric?" Trent asked the Rats since he didn't know Max prior to his team swap.
"To answer your question, definitely," Sammy nodded. She took the jar off of DJ's head, and the fireflies swarmed around the gophers' faces, forcing them to drop the Rats and their packs.
"This wasn't part of the plan," Max complained as he saw the gophers running around in order to avoid the fireflies.
"I'll go ahead and get the statue for us," DJ assured his teammates. He ran to the throne, and jumped on a passing gopher's back to reach it. Once up there, he took the statue with the green base. "I got it!"
The Maggots gasped in shock as the rest of the Rats got back up. "Rats, head for the mine carts!" Trent commanded, pointing off to where a trio of mine carts sat on a rail.
DJ agreed, only for E-Clone to appear and block his path. DJ yelped in fright, and the clone tackled him, starting a scuffle. The Toxic Rats' statue flew from DJ's hand in the process.
Moments later, a crackling through the air indicated the start of a message over the loudspeaker. "If you can hear this," Chris called out as DJ tried to fend off E-Clone, "congrats! You're not dead yet!" Scarlett was shown paying attention to the speaker, while Dave and Anne Maria ran to their statue and Molly collapsed out of exhaustion. "Wherever you are, immediately discard your bombs. I mean, backpacks, and run!"
The shot cut back to Scott and Sierra, who were in the process of taking off their own packs.
"Bombs?!" Sierra exclaimed, lifting the largest flap to see what looked like several sticks of dynamite and a detonator as Scott very quickly removed his backpack. "That's too far!"
"This is where I must be going!" Max screamed and rushed to the carts in a seemingly speedy manner, much to Scarlett's confusion. The super speeding boy tripped on a rail, but managed to land on the middle cart.
"He stayed here for way too long, and that's something I'll investigate after we're out," Scarlett said to herself and ran to the carts.
Anne Maria and Dave placed their packs on the throne, and Anne Maria snatched up the statue with the red base. "Bada bling, baby!"
"You guys," Geoff weakly called, "me and Molly are feeling wiped out." Dave and Anne Maria turned around, and saw Geoff dragging Molly slowly and weakly as their packs were discarded. Before they could get any closer, a gopher appeared and started squealing at them, frightening both Molly and Geoff.
"Geoff!!" Anne Maria cried out and gave the statue to Dave. "Hold the statue. These gophers are about to get ham fisted!"
"So I go to the carts? Okay," Dave shrugged and made his way to them.
Meanwhile, DJ managed to get the upper hand in his fight with E-Clone, and took off his pack in the process in order to put it on him.
"I have the statue. Let's go!" Sammy told DJ, who carried E-Clone along as Geoff and Molly were being protected by Anne Maria holding the gopher back.
The shot cut to the carts just as Dave reached them. Sammy, Scott, Sierra, and Trent were on the front cart and DJ, E-Clone, Max, and Scarlett were in the middle. Dave was about to get on the back cart, but he heard the sounds of Anne Maria struggling to fend off the gopher.
"I want to avoid toxic at all costs, and I can do so right now, but what about them?" Dave said while watching his endangered team.
"I can't hold on any longer!" Anne Maria grunted in her hold.
"You can do this," Geoff motivated the Jersey shore reject.
"Geoff, if we don't make it out alive," Anne Maria strained harder, "I want to let you know that I lo-"
A clang sound from behind the gopher was heard, and Anne Maria took her hands away from the gopher the moment it fainted from the blow. The camera panned out to show Dave appearing from behind it with their team's statue in hand.
"Dave!" Molly smiled. "You're our hero!"
"I'm not leaving anyone to die today!" Dave confirmed, and then frowned upon seeing the statue break.
The footage went ahead to them arriving at the rear most cart. Dave helped Molly and Geoff onto the cart, Anne Maria already on it. Dave pushed the carts from the side until they started moving forward, then hopped up into the back cart.
Most of those still conscious screamed as the carts rolled down a slope into a tunnel, then down even more into a slightly more open cave. The rails bent upward, and the carts followed them out of sight...
\
The shot cut outside to Chef and Chris waiting at what appeared to be a dilapidated mine entrance – a wooden platform and scaffolding that had been outside the elevated shaft had crumbled, and the cart track's end was twisted and bent. Both men were wearing hazmat suits, and Chef was holding the massive tongs normally reserved for elimination ceremonies.
"They're really cutting it close," Chris said.
"Mmm-hmm," Chef replied.
Seconds later, the camera panned up to focus on the entrance, and the trio of mine carts and their screaming passengers flew out into the air, then crashed just past the two adults.
When the resulting cloud of dust began to settle, the camera was focused on Max and E-Clone, the two boys coughing and hacking. The sudden clamping of the tongs around them caused them to stop, and the camera zoomed out to show Chef lifting them out of the rubble as Chris watched. "You two are leaving the island right now before you get more mutated," he said irritably before turning his focus towards the campers, just now groaning and getting to their feet.
Chris walked forward, and picked the green-based statue up off the ground. "And the Rats win! Again!"
The team just cheered weakly.
"All clear?" Chris turned and asked Chef, the hulking man still holding on to Max and E-Clone. Chef nodded, and the host took out a remote control. "EXECUTING OPERATION DOOMSDAY!" Chris shouted, pressing the button on the remote.
An explosion billowed out of the mine entrance, and when the smoke and dust cleared, it had been entirely blocked by rocks. Chris and Chef shared a happy nod.
"This wasn't about the statues!" Dave said, walking over to the two men.
"Sure it was!" Chris told him. "And as an added bonus," he motioned back to the blocked mine entrance, "you just helped me seal off the toxic waste forever! And get the feds off my back. It's win-win," he gave the camera a thumbs-up as Chef walked by behind him, "for me."
"I consider you anarchic," Scarlett told him, the shot zooming out to show the entire cast back on their feet.
"Yeah, I just keep getting better," Chris said. "Maggots, hope you're hungry for marshmallows. But first," Chef walked back up behind him, having traded in his captives for a fire hose, "before there's permanent genetic damage..." He walked away, and with a chuckle, Chef turned on the hose and doused the campers with a spray of water powerful enough to push them off-screen in a matter of seconds.
\
The footage skipped ahead to dusk, Molly and Dave standing by the girls' side of the Maggots' cabin. "I really appreciate you saving my life back there," Molly said to the normal guy.
"I couldn't just leave you guys behind," Dave responded. "That would have been selfish and wrong."
"I agree with that," Molly nodded. "Also, I'm sorry for not helping you and Katie when you were frozen. I'm trying to get used to cooperation, but that's no excuse to try and brush it off."
"You did mess up there, but I accept your apology," Dave smiled. "And here's something you can do as gratitude."
Dave whispered in Molly's ear, and the indie chick was surprised. "Really? You want to get eliminated?"
"I got over my fear of germs, and I don't want anything bad to happen after that near-death experience," Dave reasonably said.
"Did you already talk to our team about this?" Molly asked.
"I did," Dave nodded, "and besides, I was the one to break the statue, and nobody else did anything wrong."
"If this is what you want, I guess I can pay you back then," Molly agreed.
"That's all I needed out of you and the team," Dave said back.
\
The footage cut ahead to the ceremonial campfire.
"The votes, are in," Chris opened, the camera cutting outward to show him at his podium, Chef with the toxic marshmallow in a smaller pair of tongs, and the five members of the Mutant Maggots sitting nervously in a row. "Who will receive the Marshmallow of Loserdom and leave the game forever?" the host asked idly, the camera zooming in on the radioactive treat in question before panning back to Chris. "Following players are safe." He picked up the first of four normal marshmallows.
"Scarlett, Geoff, Anne Maria, and Molly," he said, tossing bits of white to each person called. "Dave, your time in Germ City has come to an end."
Dave got on his feet and quickly ducked as the toxic marshmallow was tossed overhead, landing with a sizzle off-camera. "Thanks for agreeing to vote for me!"
"You are a valuable asset to the team, but if you want to leave, then who are we to stop you?" Scarlett said.
"You're a total lifesaver man. I won't forget that about you," Geoff held out his hand for a high-five.
Dave returned the gesture. "Make sure to watch out for any more toxic that comes your way."
\
The scene flashed to the Dock of Shame, where Dave was already seated in the bucket of the season's catapult. Chris laughed, and asked "Any last words, Germaphobe?"
"One, I'm not scared of them as much anymore, and two, just fling the catapult," Dave replied, and he was soon flung into the sky.
The squeak of wheels caught Chris's attention, and the camera cut to a close-up of the wheels of a large hand truck. The shot zoomed out to reveal E-Clone and Max inside a cage being wheeled down the dock by Chef.
"It's time for the two of you to get off my island," Chris told the two captives.
"Aw, phooey," Max grumbled, and the Ezekiel clone growled angrily.
The footage flashed ahead a little, Max and E-Clone now sitting in the Hurl of Shame.
"I hope I taught you all a lesson," Max spoke up. "Evil always pre-VAAAIIIILLLLLLSSSS!" he shouted while he and E-Clone got shot into the sky.
The series's capstone theme began to play. "Join us next time," Chris said as he turned to the camera, "for more danger, treachery, and radical misadventures on Total! Drama! Rrrrevenge, of the Island!"
(Roll the Credits)

DC Next presents:

SHADOWPACT

In Heaven Forbid
Issue Four: Wanted Dead or Alive
Written by PatrollinTheMojave
Edited by GemlinTheGremlin
 
Next Issue > Coming Next Month
 
Heat shimmered off the pavement in Truth or Consequences, New Mexico. The tiny town nestled between the desert hills of the Southwest felt like a kiln, and Rory Regan was baking. “Remind me again--” He huffed between words, “--why are we walking?”
“If Destruction wanted to be found, the Lords of Chaos would’ve done it already. If Destruction is here, he’d pick up on a teleport before we stepped through and I don’t want us burning our only lead.” Traci said, adjusting her black sunhat to wipe beads of sweat from her forehead.
“It could be worse.” Sherry said with an encouraging smile. “It’s a dry heat.”
“I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I miss Gotham.” Rory looked around at the rest of the Shadowpact for a similar discomfort. His sweat was making the rags cling to his skin. “Jim. How are you not sweating? You must be wearing fifty pounds of metal.”
Jim shrugged. “Magic.”
“Of course.” Rory groaned. “Ruin?”
Ruin quirked an eyebrow and planted their feet. They’d been walking around in their signature trench coat for miles and not lost the spring in their step. They curiously pulled a finger along their forearm. “I don’t think I sweat.”
“And I guess you have some magical charm that makes you resistant to heat, Traci?”
“Yeah. It’s called being raised in Nevada.” She snorted. “Hey, Ruin. We need to keep--” Her gaze drifted up to the quaint wooden building they’d chosen to stop. A woodburnt sign hanging above the door read ‘Tumbleweed Saloon & Inn.’ She smiled. “Rory, good news. We’re here.”
Sherry looked over the saloon. Where the others had picked up sand and sweat on the long trek over, she didn’t have a hair out of place. Sherry looked like she’d stepped out of an advertisement. Her only sign of wear was the suspicion sitting behind her eyes. “You really think Destruction is here?”
“I’m not getting my hopes up.” Traci said. “The Lords of Chaos only felt a twinge, but it’s all we’ve got.”
Rory shot through the swinging saloon doors with a speed he’d lost 10 miles earlier. Ruin was just behind him, their pure black eyes pulling in every detail. Half of the space was devoted to racks and shelves of Old West merchandise; cheap hats, plastic guns, and sheriff badges. The other side of the establishment was a small bar and a few tables. The bartender wiped the bored expression from his face as the Shadowpact entered.
“We’re in a real Wild West saloon!” Ruin hurried into the merchandise section.
“Welcome to the Tumbleweed Saloon. What brings you folks into town?” The bartender said.
“I’m looking for a guy, big-looking, probably. Have you seen anyone like that? He might’ve broken something.” Traci said. She wished she had more to go off.
“We get a lot of tourists.” The man raised an eyebrow. “Wait, are you from the Justice Legion? When are you going to send those people from other universes back home? Did you catch the guy responsible yet?”
Traci exhaled sharply. “We’re here about his brother, actually.”
The clatter of hoofbeats on asphalt clicked outside, followed by the heavy footfalls of someone dropping from a horse.
“Do you get many riders out here?” Jim asked. The bartender shook his head and Jim moved a hand to his sword’s pommel. The rider walked to the saloon door. The figure was in shining white leather boots and pants to match. The peak of a stetson of the same color poked out above the saloon doors.
“I know where to find the man you’re looking for.” The doors swung open to reveal the sheet-pale face of White Stag. The only spot of color was a turquoise bolo tie around his neck and the gold-inlay guard of the rapier at his side. His opaque glasses reflected the light. Jim leapt to his feet and pulled the Sword of Night from its sheath with a metallic shtang. White Stag just raised his hands apprehensively. “While you’ve correctly surmised I am interested a rematch, Jim, I think I’d better explain myself first.”
Jim glanced at Traci, who gave him a nod. Jim lowered his sword but kept it unsheathed. “Talk.” Jim spat.
White Stag reached into his buttoned vest and pulled a cigar, then a lighter. He flicked a few times, then held the flame to the cigar’s tip. Once lit, White Stag took a deep drag and blew a ring of smoke in front of his face. “I am here for a duel with the Destroyer of Myrrha.”
"Myrrha's not destroyed!" Jim gripped the handle of the Sword of Night. "I've been locked off from it. I will find a way back!"
"No.” White Stag walked over to the bar and took a seat. He didn’t bother turning around to address Jim. “No, it's not been destroyed yet. But it's Destruction you're after, and you'll find the Endless on the road you take to meet them. Miss Witch would know about that. How well do you sleep at night, Traci?"
The answer was an uncomfortable silence. “How do we know you’re telling the truth?” Rory said.
“I knew to come here, didn’t I?”
“So after I defeat you in this duel, you’ll tell us where to find Destruction?” Jim said.
White Stag gave a thin-lipped smile. “After the duel, I’ll tell you where he is.”
“You tricked us last time. What’s the trick this time?” Jim said.
“The trick? I’m faster than you, Jim. That’s all I need to win. Blades at dawn, at the old train tracks.”
“At dawn?” Jim shook his head. “We fight now. We don’t have time to waste.”
“Where’s your flair for the dramatic, Jim? Let’s let the tension build for a few hours more. It’s not like you’re in a position to dictate terms.” White Stag stood from the bar.
“I don’t know who you are.” Sherry said. “But this sounds like a big misunderstanding. We’re trying to help people.”
“Who I am? I’m the good guy, Sheridan. And you’re the latest person to sign onto the Shadowpact, which must mean you’re trying to help yourself.” White Stag looked at Jim. “Blades. Dawn. Don’t be late.” He walked through the saloon doors and saddled up his horse while the Shadowpact watched in silence.
He’d only been gone a few seconds when Rory said. “Why not fight him now? Force him to tell us what he knows.”
Jim shook his head. “We need to play his games. He knows more than he’s letting on. And he knows about Myrrha.” A hint of desperation crept into his voice. “He could be holding all of Myrrha hostage, for all we know.”
“Myrrha? I’m unfamiliar with this realm.” Sherry said.
Jim rolled his shoulders back, staring down at the ground. “When I was twelve, I went into the back room of a record store and ended up in a medieval world full of adventure and magic. Years later, I mastered the Sword of Night and started using it to move between realities. Last year, I went to sleep in Myrrha and woke up on Earth. I haven’t been able to return there since. I hate to think what could have happened to it without its protector.”
The display racks rattled and Rory raised his fists on instinct. The rags crawled along his body, ready to strike. It was Ruin rushing out of the merchandise section, covered in cowboy gear. A pair of embossed brown leather boots replaced their usual black strap-ups. They wore a ten-gallon hat and held a cheap revolver toy in each hand. “This town ain’t big enough for the six of us!” They said in their best kitsch Western accent.
A hard glance from Jim sent Ruin withdrawing back into the gift shop, holstering their ‘weapons’. Traci spoke quietly. “Why don’t I get us all rooms for tonight. We can rest and be refreshed in the morning.” She looked up at the bartender. He was still trembling from the standoff moments ago. “Six rooms, please.”
A few hours later, Traci was doomscrolling the front page of KordConnect for articles on the Reawakening. A knock at the door pulled her out of it. “Be right there, just-- uh-- meditating!” She hopped off her bed and walked to the door.
“It’s Rory!”
Traci opened the door. He was uncostumed. His sympathetic face was incongruous with the harsh features of the suit of rags. “Hey, Traci. Can I come in?”
“What’s up?” She stood aside and Rory sat on the bed. “It seemed like what White Stag said affected you.”
“That’s what you’re here for? You don’t have to worry about someone hurting my feelings.” She laughed.
Rory relaxed his posture. “Well, I’m glad, but it’s okay if you’re hurting. That… stuff with Dream. You did what you had to. I miss John too.”
Traci’s grin drooped and she let herself fall back onto the bed. She paused, then: “Dream made me an offer. Become his warlock, like Darhk was.”
“His-- his warlock? Like work for him? What are you going to say?”
“I turned him down. There’s always, always some all-powerful asshole fucking with me and my friends. HIVE, Neron, Darhk, Dream. Dream’s just as responsible for what John… became. And if becoming Dream’s warlock means I end up like Damien Darhk, then I just-- ugh!” She grunted, trailing off.
“But, knowing you, you’re wondering if you could beat the Heavenly Host if you said yes.”
“Not just them.” Traci sat up. “Bring Jim to Myrrha. Fix the Reawakening. Actually set up some magical safety nets that I haven’t jury-rigged from lamb’s spit and a spell I found on Quora. Y’know, all of it.”
Rory turned to her and put his hand on her shoulder. “Traci, you’re the best spellcaster I’ve ever met. You literally saved the universe and you’re still doing more. We’re going to win, and we’re going to do it with or without Dream, OK?”
A cool morning held out against the stinging New Mexico heat, the sun not yet peaked over the hills surrounding Truth or Consequences. Jim walked at the head of the Shadowpact. He saw White Stag and his horse for a mile on the approach. It was a huge thing, its coat the same brilliant white sheen as the rest of Stag’s possessions. It’d been hitched up to a railway spike.
Ruin remained in their store-bought cowboy ensemble. The group were all still a minute’s walk from White Stag when Ruin called out, “Why are you doing this?” They hurried forward, breaking into a jog past the group, despite Jim’s protests.
Traci readied a spell, just in case. “You said you’re the good guy. Jim’s not perfect, but he’s good too. You don’t have to fight.” Ruin looked different that morning in a way that was hard to place. Their silhouette was fuzzy. At a glance, they looked vague and undefined, as though it took a few seconds for them to render in view. It didn’t seem to slow them down any, though at times they seemed to wince to themself
White Stag shook his head. “There comes a time in every man’s life when he has to fight.” His voice took on a bit of twang at odds with his usual refined accent.
“But why Nightmaster?”
“Every day Jim wakes up in this world, he hates it a little more. He hates the toil, the uncertainty. Mostly, he hates that here, he’s not the best. He’s a middling swordsman and a below average hero on Earth.”
Jim said nothing, staring daggers.
“And that’s why I want my duel. You don’t belong in these parts, Jim.”
“You’re a madman.” Jim said. “Playing with the lives of innocents in these stupid games.” He approached, grinding his feet into the gravel to keep from lashing out in rage.
“Playing?” White Stag’s faux accent dropped. “‘Well, I suppose I am having a great deal of fun.” A sliver of sunrise poked over the horizon. In a flash that just caught the few drops of light to trickle onto the tracks, White Stag pulled his rapier. It sliced across Nightmaster’s armor like tissue paper, leaving a long red cut across his chest. Jim grunted and drew his sword.
Sherry took a step forward, but Jim held his hand out to stop her “No!” Jim said. “If you intervene, he won’t give us what we need.”
“Old dogs can learn new tricks, it seems.” White Stag lunged, but this time his blade was batted away by the Sword of Night.
Jim went for a riposte. White Stag sideswiped and the heavy broadsword cut through the air, thunking against the railway tracks. White Stag retaliated, raking another slash across Jim’s side. Jim fell to a knee.
“Yield.” White Stag said. He didn’t get an answer. “I think your man is finished.” He turned to the rest of the Shadowpact, giving Jim the opening to grab a handful of gravel and throw it in White Stag’s face. Stag recoiled and Jim forced himself up using his sword, using the momentum to swing it into White Stag’s flank. It only made the lightest of contact, but the pale red of blood spreading through White Stag’s vest was enough to bring Jim satisfaction.
Jim followed up with another attack, which White Stag evaded. This time, Jim sensed anger behind those opaque spectacles. White Stag parried Jim’s next attack. The second his opponent was off balance, White Stag whipped his rapier at Jim’s wrist. He winced in pain. Another well-placed kick from Stag and the sword went clattering to the side. Jim reached after it, in vain.
“Yield.” White Stag said, this time his voice firmer. Sherry had seen enough battles to see the tremor in Jim’s shoulders, to know what he was going to try next. She added to White Stag, “Yield, Jim. We’ll find another way.”
“I… yield.” Jim said with a bassy, hateful tone.
In an instant, White Stag withdrew his rapier and stepped back. “I wish I could say ‘well fought’, Jim.” White Stag brushed the gravel dust away and ignored his wound. “But I did say I’d tell you where to find Destruction.”
“But I lost.” Jim said, confused.
“Yes, you did. And you continue to lose every day you spend away from Myrrha, right?”
Jim stared at the ground, in a haze.
“You’ll find Destruction at Coast City.”
“Coast City? What would he be doing there?” Rory asked.
White Stag shrugged. “Paying his respects? In any case, I think this concludes our time together for now. I look forward to our next meeting, Jim.” He walked away from the Shadowpact, towards the vast empty desert.
“I don’t think so.” Sherry said. “Not until you answer whatever questions Jim has about Myrrha.”
“I don’t think that would benefit anyone, do you? A nice try at reconciliation, angel. Truly, living up to your occupation.” Sherry charged forward, prepared to take the brunt of any attack White Stag was capable of and tackle him to the ground. However, wInstead, when he swiped his sword it did not clash with Sherry; instead, a portal opened in the air.a quick swipe tore open a portal in the air, White Stag stepped through, and it vanished in an instant. Sherry ran straight past her target.
“His sword can open portals too?” Rory said.
Ruin ignored him and went to Jim’s side, helping him onto his feet. ”C’mon, partner.” Jim winced, taking their hand and slowly rising.
“We need to keep moving. I can bind that move, but there’s no telling how long Destruction will stay in one place. Next stop: Coast City.” Traci said.

Had my shoulder repaired and a torn bicep fixed due to routine dislocations and must wear a sling for 6 weeks. I figured with the opioids now is a good time to cut back. I’m currently on day 5 of zero alcohol, no real withdrawal symptoms except for anxiety the first day. At my worst I was drinking 200ml of whiskey or vodka and around 6 IPAs each night at home, blowing $25-$30 depending on the IPA.
Going for my record of 11 days but I have to and I’m almost halfway through wearing the sling but it’s very uncomfortable. This isn’t the typical small cloth one with a strap around the neck, it’s a heavy duty one with a strap around the arm, around the neck, and around the waist. There’s also tons of Velcro and if it isn’t perfectly lined up it scratches like hell.
Since stopping alcohol and running out of opioids, I’ve been going to sleep around 10pm but waking up at 3:00am-4:00am, tossing for about 20min and then giving up. The benefit is I’m getting more stuff done by 7am than I would get done on Saturdays or Sundays when I was super hungover and on the couch all day. I have some coffee around 530am but no other caffeine.
I’m beginning to think it’s a combo of the two, stopping alcohol and wearing the sling, I really don’t have a problem getting to sleep but I just keep waking up around 330am.
The other benefit is I sleep for a longer period without waking up, before surgery I would wake up about every hour from the pain and also to go to the bathroom if I drank a ton that day, just having trouble sleeping past 330am.

The summer sun casts a warm glow through the windows of your cozy living room, as you and your wife settle in for a relaxing game night. Both of you are dressed comfortably in light, breezy clothing, perfect for the season. The atmosphere is relaxed, but there's an undercurrent of excitement and desire between you, evident in the way your wife's eyes linger on you, her lips curved into a playful smile.
Your wife sits across from you, her legs crossed, revealing a hint of smooth, light skin. She wears a loose, floral-print sundress that accentuates her curves, the fabric swaying gently with every movement. Her long, flowing hair cascades over her shoulders, adding to her allure. She leans forward, her gaze fixed on you, her voice filled with anticipation.
"So… since we have some time to ourselves tonight, how about we do a little game? I propose we explore my underwear collection, and you can help me decide which ones to keep. What do you say?"
A mischievous glint sparkles in your eyes as you eagerly agree to your wife's proposition. You feel a rush of excitement coursing through your veins, ready to embark on this intimate adventure together.
You pull up a chair next to your wife, positioning yourself closer to her. The anticipation in the air is palpable as she reaches over and takes your hand, her touch sending a thrilling shiver down your spine.
"Here's how it's going to work. I have gathered a selection of my most interesting underwear pieces, and I want you to see them on me. You can give me your honest opinion on each one, and we'll decide together which ones are keepers. Oh, and remember, you do have to give an opinion! Can’t say you like them all. "
She leans in, her voice low and sultry, her breath tickling your ear.
"Now, why don't you sit back and relax? If you can…"
A wicked grin spreads across your face as you respond to your wife's proposal, infusing your words with a hint of spice and anticipation.
"You've got my full attention, babe. I'm ready to see what you've got in store," you reply, your voice laced with desire. "Tell me, where should I sit for the best view?"
Your wife's eyes light up with mischief as she leads you to a large, plush armchair positioned in the center of the room. She playfully pats the seat, inviting you to take a comfortable position.
"Right here, my referee. Get yourself settled and get ready to be blown away. I'll be standing just a few steps in front of you, ready to make your heart race."
She sways her hips sensually as she positions herself, emphasizing the seductive nature of the upcoming show. You feel a surge of excitement as you sink into the soft cushions, eagerly awaiting the unveiling of her secret collection.
She slowly raises her hands to the straps of her sundress, teasingly letting them slip down her shoulders, revealing more of her pale skin. The fabric glides down her body, pooling at her feet, leaving her standing before you in a lace bra and matching panties that accentuate her curves.
With a playful twinkle in her eyes, she starts to sway her hips to an imaginary rhythm, a slow and sensuous dance that accentuates every curve of her body. Her fingers trace lightly over her smooth skin, exploring the contours of her exposed chest and abdomen, while her eyes remain locked with yours, intensifying the connection between you.
"Do you like what you see, my love? Tell me, how does it make you feel?"
A surge of desire courses through you as you express your admiration for your wife's stunning appearance.
"You look absolutely stunning. I'm speechless. Can't see well enough though... please come closer"
You can't help but crave a closer view, and she eagerly obliges, striding over to you with a sultry smile.
She positions herself on your lap, facing you, her warm breath caressing your ear as she leans in closer. You bury your head in the gentle curve of her chest, feeling the softness of her skin against your cheek. With a mischievous glimmer in her eyes, she starts to move, teasing you with her sensuous dance.
Her hips sway slowly, brushing against your own, creating an exquisite friction that ignites your desire. Her fingers glide through your hair, gently tugging and guiding your head, allowing you to explore the contours of her body with your lips and tongue.
"Mmm, maybe a should get myself together… not sure I can…" She whisper in your ear as she continues to move, her hands wander, tracing along your jawline and down your neck, igniting sparks of pleasure. She leans in, her lips tantalizingly close to yours, but just out of reach.
Your desire for a closer view intensifies, and you suggest a tantalizing change in position.
"Turn around, I need to see better the underwear if I want to be able to assess it"
With a mischievous giggle, your wife playfully complies, turning around to face away from you. She positions herself, straddling your lap, her back pressed against your chest.
As the sultry rhythm of the music fills the room, she starts to move her hips in a slow and enticing lap dance. Her fingers trail along your arms and thighs, teasingly brushing against your skin, while you lean in to kiss her back, savoring the taste of her soft, exposed skin.
Your lips explore the curves of her spine, leaving a trail of passionate kisses as you travel upward. The delicate lace of her panties peeks out, tempting you to continue your exploration. The scent of her arousal fills the air, heightening your own desire.
"Mmm, my love." She moans
You continue to shower her back with kisses, your hands instinctively finding their way to her hips, gripping them firmly as you feel the heat building between you.
Your hands glide up her body, gently caressing her breasts through the lace of her bra. She arches her back, pressing herself against you, savoring the sensation of your touch. Your lips brush against her ear as you speak, your voice filled with desire.
"Tell me what you want me to do next."
She playfully steps back, breaking the intimate contact between you, but her teasing touch continues as she kneels before you, her eyes filled with mischief. Her fingers expertly explore the growing bulge in your pants, adding to the intoxicating pleasure that fills the air.
With a seductive grin, she asks about your rating for her first piece of the try-on, her touch becoming more deliberate and arousing.
"So, my love, what's your score for the first piece? Does it make you ache for more?"
"The first piece left me speechless, but I’m not able to rate it. I have nothing else to compare it to!”
Your response leaves her delighted and eager to showcase more of her collection. She releases her grip on your crotch and rises gracefully from her kneeling position, a knowing smile playing on her lips.
She takes a step back, her eyes locked with yours as she slowly hooks her fingers around the waistband of her lacy panties. With a teasing flick of her wrist, she starts to lower them, revealing a tantalizing glimpse of her intimate area.
"I'm glad the first piece had such an impact on you, my love. Are you ready for the next reveal?"
Your breath catches in your throat as she gracefully undresses, revealing every inch of her exquisite body. Your eyes hungrily devour her form, from her perfectly curved breasts to the curve of her hips and the inviting warmth between her legs. You can’t help it but notice the glistening look of her inner area, which makes your erection grow even more at this point, you can feel your heart pounding on your chest rapidly. The room fills with a palpable tension as both of you shed your clothes, baring yourselves to the other's gaze.
As you settle back in the chair, fully aroused, she unexpectedly but playfully takes hold of your throbbing cock, her fingers wrapping around the shaft. She looks into your eyes with a wicked smile, knowing the effect she has on you. With a few firm, skillful strokes, she sends waves of pleasure coursing through your body, leaving you longing for more.
“Wait right here, my naughty lover. I have another set of lingerie that I know will drive you wild."
Before she goes, she leans down, her lips engulfing your pulsating member, giving you a series of deep, satisfying sucks. The sensation is overwhelming, causing a low moan to escape your lips. She then pulls back, laughter dancing in her eyes as she saunters away, leaving you craving her touch.
You watch her as she disappears into another room, anticipation building with each passing moment. The sound of fabric rustling fills the air as she begins to change into the next enticing ensemble, her body hidden from view for a brief but tantalizing interlude.
(End of Part 1)
- Ember Noir https://www.amazon.com/stores/Ember-NoiauthoB0C537HR6N

This is the official end of the first Volume. Next week will begin Volume 2!
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Elijah Commission
Azeline Commission
The Little Menace
Worship Her
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-
Bennett was dead asleep in his hammock when he was roused by hushed whispers and the sound of activity echoed throughout the room, seemingly amplified by its cramped space.
“Ben.” A voice called out.
As the engineer slowly opened a singular eye, he found himself struggling to make sense of the situation. A figure was just a few meters away from him, rifling through a bag when they turned around and faced him. However, Bennetts groggy state prevented him from fully discerning who or what was responsible for the disruption.
“Ben, wake up.” The voice called out one more time.
Scowling in irritation, Bennett chose to ignore the voice and flipped over, burying his face into the hammock's fabric. He was determined to get back to sleep, even as the voice grew more insistent and the room's activity continued.
“Ben, wake the fuck up!” The voice finally yelled.
Suddenly, Bennett found himself suspended in the air, his groggy state replaced with fear and anxiety as he was forcefully yanked out of his hammock. He tried to process what was happening, but before he could comprehend the situation, he felt the cold embrace of the hardwood floor.
THUD
“Argh! Fuck!” The Engineer groaned as he slowly lifted himself up off the ground. "You goddamn asshole!" Bennett snapped, his voice hoarse from the mixture of pain and anger.
Standing over Bennett with a cackling Fairy on his shoulder, Elijah decided he wasn’t going to wait for the stubborn man to get up on his own. "It's time to get up," Elijah said, turning around to continue sifting through his bag. "We got a lot of shit to do before we leave, and I can't afford to have you sleeping in."
Bennett’s glare shifted between his captain and his sadistic partner. "Fine, fine. I'm up," he grumbled, rubbing his sore back. He knew Elijah was right, but that didn't make the sudden wake-up call any less infuriating. Yana, on the other hand, seemed to be enjoying Bennett's misery, her laughter ringing in his ears.
THUD
Pulling out his remaining Bioscanner, Elijah began running diagnostics on the device, ensuring it was in working order for when he delivered it to Salvanius. It was a trade that he was loathing, but it was a trade he would make 1000 times if given the chance to get the rest of their equipment back. Even if they only managed to find a quarter of their property, that was still a lot better than having nothing at all.
As the Bioscanner's display indicated the device was functioning optimally, Elijah let out a small depressed sigh and slid it into his pocket. "Alright, let's get this over with," he said, opening the door and stepping out into the dimly lit corridor. Bennett followed, still grumbling under his breath about the hostile work environment while shifting his stink eye at both Yana and Elijah.
THUD
“GOD DAMNIT!!” Bennett yelled, rubbing his head after hitting the top of the door frame.
He had completely forgotten how cramped everything was on this wooden death trap and how he had to crouch throughout the entire interior. Frustration and annoyance etched on his face, Bennett muttered a string of curses under his breath as he adjusted his posture to avoid the low ceilings and narrow passageways.
“Midgets…” The Engineer sneered as he heard Elijah snicker father up ahead.
It only took a few moments for Elijah and Bennett to reach the deck, and there they observed Rhea efficiently issuing orders to the ship's sailors. Her authoritative voice rang out over the hustle and bustle of the ship’s crew, who were quickly scurrying about, securing ropes and checking supplies. What really caught their attention, though, was Rhea was finally out of her armor.
Adorned in a faded white linen long-sleeved shirt, Rhea left her chest straps slightly undone, revealing a hint of her modest, but alluring cleavage. The Knight Captain’s slim, athletic figure was displayed in stark contrast to the thick padding underneath the metal armor she normally wore. To accentuate her figure, the tight brown linen pants she wore hugged her humbly, but satisfyingly shapely curves and seamlessly tucked into her leather boots. The outfit, deceptively sultry, effortlessly exuded a sense of casual confidence and undeniable charm.
Turning her head slight, the Knight Captain finally noticed the two Humans and acknowledged them with a nod. “Good morning Sir Elijah, Sir Bennett and…” She made a difficult face when her eyes locked onto Yana.
“Your Honor will do!” The Fairy said in a chipper voice, crossing her legs. “I am both a Goddess and a confirmed Eternal Judge of the Fae courts!”
Rhea’s expression turned sour for a moment, but decided it was best not to engage any further with the mischievous Vanir. "Very well, good morning Your Honor," Rhea replied, forcing a polite smile. "We're running a bit late, but we should be ready to set sail in just a few hours.”
Elijah raised an eyebrow at the small fairy at the mention of being a confirmed judge, but shifted his attention back towards Rhea and nodded in understanding. "We'll be ready whenever you are," he said with his eyes traveling up her entire figure attire before refocusing on her face. "Just give us the signal when it's time to set sail." .
“I’m assuming the northern woman is still asleep?” The Knight Captain asked, tilting her head curiously.
Seeing her long elf ears bounce up and down seemed to be the final straw for Elijah, as an unbidden and almost adolescent fascination welled up within him. He blinked a few times, trying to regain his composure before replying. "Uh, yeah, she’s still asleep," Elijah finally responded, exhaling deeply. "We’ve been up for almost 36 hours, so I think it's best to let her rest for a while longer." he replied, trying to maintain a professional demeanor despite the lingering fascination with her elf ears.
Bennett narrowed his eyes in annoyance as he regarded his captain with a disgusted look. "Can you control yourself?" he asked with a judgmental tone.
Also noticing Elijah’s basically ogling her, Rhea couldn't help but laugh at the exchange while running a hand through her hair. "I'm glad to see at least someone finds me attractive," she said, her cheeks tinted with a slight blush. Elijah cleared his throat, trying to regain some semblance of dignity as he shifted his gaze away from her.
"Ah... My apologies, Lady Rhea, but I was caught off guard," Elijah said, giving her a genuine smile. "I wasn’t prepared for the famed Knight Captain to be so beautiful out of her armor. It's a pleasant surprise, to say the least."
Rhea found herself momentarily speechless as her cheeks flushing a deep shade of red. She wasn't used to receiving compliments, let alone being called beautiful by someone as striking as Elijah. A small, bashful smile tugged at the corners of her lips as she looked down to hide her embarrassment. "Well… I, um… Thank you, Sir Elijah.” she managed to say, her voice uncharacteristically timid. “I appreciate the kind words."
Noticing the usually confident and stern Knight Captain was completely flustered, Elijah knew she was on the backfoot and went for blood. “You’re more than welcome Lady Rhea,” he responded, bowing his head. “I was just saying it how I see it—”
"Yana, zap him!" Bennett ordered, sensing that Elijah was about to push his luck too far.
The mischievous fairy didn't hesitate, and with a magical pop, she immediately shifted forms, transforming the fiery inferno atop her head into a flowing teal, wind that cascaded past her shoulders. After her transformation, a maniacal grin spread across her face as she clutched two fistfuls of Elijah's hair.
“AHH FUCK!” Elijah yelped in pain.
A light chuckle escaped Rhea's lips as she watched the scene play out before her, momentarily pushing aside her embarrassment and wariness of the group. Their playful antics, though unprofessional, stirred a sense of lighthearted camaraderie she hadn't experienced in years. The thrill of exploring the unknown alongside trusted friends had been lost to her ever since she joined Salvanius' Order. The organization's rigid structure and hierarchy had dampened her once-adventurous spirit, and witnessing Elijah's crew sparked a touch of envy within her.
Yana, still grinning mischievously, finally released her grip on Elijah's hair. The man, now fuming with anger, made a hasty attempt to snatch her out of the air, but the nimble fairy easily dodged his grasp, giggling all the while.
"I'm going to kill the both of you!" Elijah yelled, glaring at both Yana and Bennett. His frustration only caused more laughter from the fairy and an amused smirk from Bennett, who crossed his arms and leaned back against the railing.
"Come now, Sir Elijah, there's no need for violence," Rhea interjected while covering her mouth in a poor attempt to hide her own laughter. "I'm sure you can find it in your heart to forgive their little prank.” She continued, adjusting her hair that was flowing in the wind. “We’re going to spend a few long days sailing if we’re going to catch up with them, after all.”
Glancing back at her crew, Rhea's face returned to its usual stern expression when she noticed the sailors gawking and whispering amongst themselves. It was evident that her momentary display of mirth had taken them by surprise, as they rarely saw their Knight Captain in such a lighthearted state.
"What in the name of Tylas are you all gawking at!?" She roared, placing her hands firmly on her hips “GET BACK TO WORK!”
Rhea's eyes narrowed as the scrambling crew members hastily returned to their tasks, their faces pale with fear. The ship's atmosphere instantly shifted back to its usual disciplined state as the sailors focused on their duties, aware that their Knight Captain's gaze was upon them.
Elijah let out an annoyed sigh in the realization that he was probably never going to catch that little psychopath and shifted his gaze to Bennett. “I’m gonna get you.” He hissed hatefully. “Mark my words, you piece of shit.” However, Bennett merely smirked in response, clearly unfazed by his captain's threats.
Just as Elijah was about to ask the Knight Captain about the whereabouts of her liege, the man himself appeared on deck. Salvanius came sauntering up the planks that connected the ship to the docks, his imposing figure drawing the attention of everyone present.
"It's quite rare to hear you so jovial, Rhea," the Demigod remarked, a faint smile tugging at the corners of his lips. Rhea, slightly taken aback by her liege's observation, straightened her posture and cleared her throat.
"My apologies, your grace," she replied respectfully, attempting to regain her usual composure. "I shall see to it that this Cog is ready to depart, post haste."
Salvanius waved a dismissive hand, his expression softening slightly. "There's no need to apologize, Rhea. It's good to see you enjoying yourself, even if just for a moment. However, you are correct; our guest would most likely appreciate departing as soon as possible."
With that, Rhea nodded and began barking orders to her crew, ensuring that everything was in order for their imminent departure.
Turning to his guests, Salvanius addressed them with an air of authority. "I assume you two have the magical tool..." He paused, recalling the events that transpired the previous day. "I mean, the tool. Is it ready?"
The two Human’s exchanged glances before Elijah stepped forward, pulling out the bioscanner from his pocket. "You’re not going to be able to understand it, but I’ve configured it in a way where you can still get a lot of functionality without having to read." he explained, holding the device out for Salvanius to see.
Time flew as Elijah went into an in depth explanation of the bioscanner's functions and features. He walked Salvanius through everything all the way from disease diagnosis to health monitoring and treatments. With each new feature the human listed seemed to make Salvanius’ jaw drop lower and lower until he found himself looking like a fool.
"And finally, if a red tube with a bolt of lightning ever just starts flashing, all you have to do is flip it over so these panels face the star and just wait," Elijah explained, pointing at the bright orb in the morning sky as he showed the Demigod the solar panels. "It's designed to recharge itself using starlight, so you'll never have to worry about finding a power source."
Salvanius' eyes widened even further, if that were possible. "Astounding," he breathed, clearly impressed. "And you’re just willing to give this to me…?"
“Eh.” Elijah shrugged dismissively. “I have augments- I mean I can already do most of that stuff other than a few things, so it’s mainly just redundant fail safe incase I’m away or dead.”
A complicated expression spread across Salvanius' face as Elijah mentioned that the device was merely a redundancy measure in case of his absence. Suddenly the prospect of having this man as a retainer became much, MUCH more appealing. However, his thoughts were soon interrupted when the Vanir made its appearance by landing squarely on Elijah’s shoulder while glaring daggers at the Demigod.
Salvanius met Yana's gaze and sighed, dispelling the intrusive and dishonorable thoughts of taking these Artificers for himself.
“I understand.” The demigod said, turning his focus back to Elijah. “The Holy Dominion will not forget this grace you’ve bestowed upon us.” He gave a grateful nod before spinning around and heading towards the dock.
However, he soon came to a halt as his eyes fell upon a group of women arguing with his knights at the ramp leading to the ship. The women seemed intent on gaining access to the ship, their arms laden with various items, including several sizable platters of food.
“W-Wait! I-I was instructed to board!” A slim and fearful redhead said, holding a large burlap sack.
Something felt… Off about her.
It was almost as if Salvanius could recognize the woman, even though he was fairly certain he hadn't met her before. Then again, he had met a great number of people in this damned village, but his instincts kept nudging him to take a closer look. But his thoughts were interrupted when he recognized the Beastkin woman and the gaggle of Ferfolk slaves next to her.
"What do ye mean we ain't allowed entry!? I gotta deliver me gratitude before it's too late!" the dog-like woman bellowed, her voice full of frustration and urgency.
An amused huff left Salvanius’ mouth before looking over his shoulder. “I do believe you have guests.” The Demigod said before making his way down the plank.
“Let them through.” He said to his knights, waving his hand dismissively as he walked past the group.
The knights obeyed without hesitation and stepped aside allowing the gaggle of women to board the ship. "Thank ye, yer grace," The dog-like woman bowed deeply before her and the Ferfolk ran up the ramp.
As Elijah approached at the edge of the ship , confusion spread across his face as Mara suddenly appeared with her renowned tubers in hand. The woman stopped a good distance away, staring intently at the man, attempting to gauge his reaction and determine whether he would be receptive to her presence. Seeing he was just staring at her impassively, Mara gathered her courage, and stepped forward with a warm smile.
"I... I wanted to give ye this as a token of me gratitude…” She said shyly. “Ye know, for everything ye done for us."
Elijah's eyes flicked between Mara and the tubers, his confusion slowly melting away into a wry smile as he flicked his hand in a beckoning motion. The action caused Mara’s Shyness to completely dissipate as she bounded forward and handed him the tubers with enthusiasm. "You really didn't have to, but thank you," Elijah said, accepting the gift.
Mara beamed at his response, clearly relieved. "It's the least I could do!” She said, with her tail wagging vigorously. “I couldn’t bear the thought of not makin’ amends with ye.”
Turning around, Elijah handed this plate of tubers to the salivating Engineer and watched as Yana bolted off his shoulder in an attempt to attack the pile of food. Shaking his head, Elijah turned back to Mara and the group of women with a bemused expression. "Hopefully they’ll leave me some," he commented.
“Ye can always come back and get more.” Mara replied with a coy. “I’ll let ye have all the service ye want.”
A chuckle escaped Elijah’s mouth as he ran a hand through his hair. "I might just take you up on that," he said with a smirk. "Your food isn’t the only thing I’m going to miss."
Mara's cheeks flushed deeply at Elijah's reply, her tail wagging even faster as she tried to play it cool. "Well, I'll be sure to make myself available whenever ye are in need of some company," she replied, propping up her supple chest.
Elijah couldn't help but let his eyes wander for a moment before meeting Mara's gaze again, a lopsided grin playing at the corners of his mouth. "I'll… keep that in mind as long as you promise not to try to get me killed again." he replied with a goofy tone that made the dog-girl giggle.
“So all I need to do is spread my legs if I’m ever in need of your forgiveness?” Azelines voice rang out from behind him as the blond Elf woman emerged from the ship still rubbing the sleepiness from her eyes.
With a mouth full of fried tubers, Bennett decided to chime in. “I told him his dick is going to eventually get him killed.” He said, beckoning the Ferfolks to place the other platters on a nearby box.
Bringing a hand up to press against his eyes, Elijah let out an annoyed groan before turning his attention towards the two. “Why do you have to make this weird?” He asked in exasperation. "It’s all about sincerity.”
Bennett snickered, shoving another tuber into his mouth. "Ah yes. You hear that Aze?” He continued in a mocking tone while elbowing Azeline in the ribs. “You need to put more effort in your apologies!"
Azeline smirked, her teasing nature starting to leak out. "Is that so? I guess I’ll make sure any future apologies come with… an appropriate amount of sincerity and effort." She said, striking a pose that was more satirical than seductive.
“Jesus Christ…” Elijah muttered under his breath while his two crewmates broke out into laughter. “I hate both of you.”
The laughter continued after successfully eliciting an annoyed response from their beleaguered captain. However, a quiet seemed to take over the deck as everyone's attention shifted towards the approaching Knight Captain. "So that's the type of man you are, Sir Eli-jah" Rhea remarked with a raised eyebrow. "I'll bear that in mind when you try to charm me with your honeyed words."
“Oh god damnit…” Elijah facepalmed and dragged his hand down his face as another roar of laughter erupted from everyone in the group.
Rhea’s hand was covering her mouth as she tried to suppress a chuckle. “A-Anyways…” She chortled. “We should be ready to sail any moment now, so make sure you’re all prepared for departure.” The woman said, walking off in the direction of the Helm while her shoulders shook in mirth.
Elijah just stood there for a moment, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Where the hell is Auri?” He asked no one in particular, his frustration starting to show.
“A-Ahh… H-Hello.”
Recognizing the voice, Elijah looked up to see a petite woman with bright red hair looking up at him expectantly while holding onto a large burlap sack. Glad to see that he at least didn’t have to go hunting for the dainty woman, Elijah let loose a heavy breath of relief. “Alright, I’ll go tell Lady Rhea-” He tried to say, but Auri interrupted him.
Auri squirmed nervously before asking, "Umm… Should I be worried that you also have designs on me?"
“Oh for fucks sake!” Elijah threw his arms up and let them slap against his thighs in frustration as the rest of the crew barked in laughter. "Let’s just go already!”
Yana however, completely ignored the incessant bickering and Instead, she hungrily finished off one of the smaller platters of tubers and chomped down on the last tiny morsel on the wooden plate. Sighing Contentedly, the Fairy’s gaze fell upon Mara and her small group of Ferfolks as they said their goodbyes and disappeared from view. In their stead, the more fidgety whelping appeared, the one who always seemed to look at Ben and Eli with eager eyes. Although this man seemed far weaker than his sibling, he at least displayed a measure of reverence towards her servants.
Turning her head up towards the clear blue sky, Yana placed a hand on her tiny belly and sighed contentedly. She couldn't wait to see what other delightful mortal delicacies or fanciful experiences she would get to experience in the future.
​
[First] [Previous] [Next]

My sleepless dream ends with an alarm, the pounding klaxon of mission start. The whirring of servos and pump of hydraulics brings my body to full readiness, ready for one last ticket.
The Woman from Angeri gave us this mission. She gave it to us and us alone. For the glory of all Mankind she said, strike at the heart of the Imperium. Bloody their nose in a way they’ll never forget.
The pilot, a good one from Yord, helps me get into gear. Everything from the combat armor, thrusters, and the ever-important Agamemnon device.
Myself and the rest of my team step into the waiting airlock, turning on the armor seals and tapping into the armor air reserves. The chamber depressurizes before the airlock finally opens. We jump outside the deployment vessel and switch our radios on, waiting for the signal to begin our descent to the world below.
“Mayday, Mayday, this is the Independent Trader Timberwolf,”
“Acknowledged Timberwolf, how may we assist,” came the response from the Imperial highport authorities.
“I don’t know, there seems to be an issue with the jump fuel li-” the captain began to say before the ship suddenly went up in a ball of white. The captain played her part beautifully, and the wreckage would act as our cover to hot drop onto the world.
Thrusters activate and I deploy my heat shield as I gun for the palace. The Coalition will be sorry to lose that pilot, she got us right over target.Now initially the Imps didn’t seem too perturbed. Debris from a ship that small would just burn up in atmosphere, no skin off their back, but they did get worried seeing five little metallic things drop from high orbit right over the palace. We made it to about cloud level before they scrambled fighters. Pretty good all be told.
Jond did his part too, he flipped around and pushed his thrusters to meet the oncoming jets. As he did so I activated the Agamemnon device. Jond got off about four rockets, splashing four of the jets, before he got taken out.
The rest flew around like headless chickens, this hot and heavy device strapped to my back cast out hundreds of false sensor pings for them to follow, blinding them in all capacities except the MK. 1 eyeball.
Even then, we were small, we were fast, and we were refracting light thanks to these cloaks. Imps never knew what hit em as we finally made touch down in the gardens of the palace. Asha, Nargör, and Dekan went to make a nuisance of themselves, sliver guns out and on the bounce.
The shoulder mounted plasma gun took out the main door, and some poor Imp standing behind it. I stormed into a room of Imperial marines, guns in hand, and practically as reflex I washed em out with hypersonic slivers. This ballistic computer was worth every penny of Coalition dime as I ripped holes into Imp after Imp.
One poor bastard even tried to knife me, as if a little knife is going to stop the one-ton steel abomination that is me. I ripped his head off and continued further into the palace. Everywhere I go is decorated with frescoes, paintings, and statues depicting all the glories of Mankind they revere, and everything that drove them to conflict with us. I find it a bit arrogant, but mine is not to question why.
A few Imps try to interrupt my thoughts, but again they are ripped apart by slivers on reflex. They even bothered to set-up a heavy laser emplacement at the end of the hallway, not that it does them any good. They burn through a decent chunk of my left arm as I rolled out of the way and down a side passage. A quick particulate grenade obscures their next shot, and a plas grenade silences the gun. That was a very quick response, clearly not enough though.
Pushing through a few more isolated bands of Imps, I find the rather gaudy throne room with its big golden doors. Left arm is at reduced effectiveness, and I can only guess that most of his personal guard is in the room with him.
Instead of walking through the front door, I push up to the ceiling. Hanging there I bore through it with a breaching charge, and emerge up on the roof. I find a rather surprised team of snipers who are quickly dispatched by my saka after I leap at them.
Dropping down from the skylight I make ready to dispatch the Emperor’s personal guard, only to find none. Just an old man on a gaudy throne.
“My sons and daughters have already evacuated the palace Coalition Man,”
“They were not our target,”
“Truly? You have far more restraint than my generals it would seem,"
“Call it a difference in philosophy,” I said, and at that the Emperor of the Empire of the Mind laughed long and deep.
“I know you find me repugnant Coalition Man, but would you honor a final request?”“Depends,”
“I wish to fall on my sword,”
“Then do it,” I said, to which the Emperor gave a simple nod.
There the Emperor drew from his throne a long blade, and succeeded in his final will. I took his head, and split his spine to ensure there was no recovery.
“Target eliminated. Adiri 1-5, report,”
“War Cabinet eliminated. Adiri 2,”
“Engaging the enemy. Adiri 3,”
“I am near overrun. Adiri 4,”
“Mission success, say your final prayers,”
No Imps come to avenge their emperor. Maybe they’re distracted? Or cowards. Either way, it seems I have a moment. I sit on this throne, this paltry thing of stone and gold that enables little men to end millions. Don’t know what I expected. It's a little vindicating to deliver the death he so flippantly affected back to him and his councilors, each of which could have schemed to prevent this. When my soul goes to Orz, to the living Void, I think he’ll find this all very funny. It's been long enough, I confirm the self-destruct order.
It burns for only a moment.
​
For another perspective of this conflict:
A Chance Meeting
​
Author's Note: If anyone understands why Reddit ruined my formatting three different ways when posting this that would be wonderful.

So.. I’m gonna start this off with saying I sobbed about 4 times wondering if I’d made a horrible mistake removing my gallbladder. I had a single 2.4cm stone & I never had an attack before removal, but I had SEVERE acid reflux/heartburn to the point where I was using a rescue inhaler 3 times a day because I wheezed so badly. I developed full on uncontrolled asthma for awhile there and the only thing that pacified it was a very strict diet. Even then, the wheeze never fully settled, but it didn’t get worse when coughing so I tolerated it. I still have the wheeze post-op but it’s very mild, it doesn’t restrict my breathing and it’s honestly just an inconvenience. I am 99.9% sure it was causing by me refluxing in my sleep because raising my bed + diet alleviated it, BUT with that being said, I must also add that yesterday I ate macaroni and cheese. And one day post-op I ate DQ ice cream cake (not a lot mind you, I only eat the vanilla like the picky 23 year old I am). I was terrified. I ate that mac n cheese like I was the world’s slowest competitive eater, taking big gulps of water in between each bite trying to lessen the horrific consequences I was sure were coming. I read so many horror stories - even my dad told me certain greasy foods have made him run. I waited, and I waited, and I waited.. and nothing happened. My ass did not explode. My stomach made a couple weird sounds, gurgled a little & was kinda bloated after I ate the whole bowl. Then I ate a homemade rice krispy square. Nothing happened. It was like a weight was lifted off my chest. I wanted to cry again but from happiness. For days I’ve been terrified to try anything, everyone had me convinced a 1cm cube of cheese would make me immediately shit myself. I thought I had ruined my life. Now’s probably a good time to add that I have panic disorder and PTSD from serious illness as a child. I’ve had 5 (technically 6) surgeries, but I had never lost an organ before. I thought I had made the wrong choice. I’m still not entirely set in my choice, but I’m very grateful for the progress I’ve seen these past few days that’s lowered my stress. I have heartburn a lot, but I notice I’m not refluxing as much - I still am refluxing some, but not every single burp. The heartburn happens no matter what I eat, but when I burp, it’s not acid or bile so I’m wondering if it may be my throat needing to heal still from the scope + biopsies done alongside my surgery. I did burp acid/bile once or twice a few hours after having a strawberry coconut drink from Starbucks, though. I’m terrified of developing severe bile reflux, though I’m sure that’s what I had before removal because high dose prevacid stopped working completely. I take omeprazole twice a day now and I pop gaviscon regularly whenever I feel a burn. A friend said her mother had heartburn for about two months after her gallbladder removal before it subsided and has never bothered her since. My dad had horrible heartburn every single night before his removal, so bad it made him vomit multiple times, and now I haven’t seen him touch an antacid since the start of 2023 (his surgery was in December). I’m holding out hope this will be temporary and is just a part of recovery. I’m definitely keeping an open mind and I’m trying my best to keep stress levels low.
Please don’t let yourself be scared by all the horror stories. When things go bad, people complain - but when things go good, they carry on living and you never hear about it again. For every horror story there are tons of people in your every day life living happily without their gallbladders. I’ve learned so many people I’ve known for years had theirs removed ages ago! It’s insane how common this surgery is.
Also, my pain level has gone down substantially! Still some gas remaining that likes to sit in my right hip and right shoulder at night while I’m trying to sleep, but I can move around fairly well now without any pain. Three days ago laughing made me start crying, and a few hours ago I was able to have a light chuckle a few times while watching The Boys with minimal pain :)

"With a trial that Renzo the Destroyer has started, and the Unseen now on high alert, Willow and I must continue our part in helping Thunder rescue Evie and undermining the Unseen's Grand Scheme. This is now venturing into some disturbing levels of dark." The Order of the Vault walks down the Kevolution Materia-infested halls of The Renzone, searching for the next member of the Unseen to beat up and steal a key from. The groaning of Cube Monsters is heard throughout the halls of The Renzone, audibly getting louder as the group nears the source. Once they return to the main party area, the Cube Monsters in the area immediately grow angry at the sight of the Vault Guardians. Ableton shoots a few Fiends with his Shadow Tracker and takes them out, while Thunder mows down loads of them with his Havoc Suppressed Rifle. The room is cleared... for now. Thunder looks around and speaks. "We should find that thieving fox, Stray. I have a suspicion that he's nearby." With everything Thunder said, the Vault Guardians all follow him, as they continue looking through the halls. After what seemed like a while, the group uncovers a room, almost looking like the main hall in Kenjutsu Crossing. Thunder looks around and speaks. "The architecture looks similar to the main palace at Kenjutsu Crossing. The palace the River Guard resides in. Stray has to be nearby." As they wander the room for a bit, Ableton is then surprise attacked. Suddenly a whirlwind appears, bringing a duo of deceiving Unseen members. Who are these two? The Unseen's thieving tricksters, Stray and Highwire. Thunder looks at Stray and responds. "Masaki! I should've known. Your stunt at Steamy Springs could've potentially killed your sister, Mizuki. What dark intentions are you playing at?" Stray looks at Thunder and answers him. "Dark? Dahlia is having me do this for fun. She doesn't want any other syndicate getting in her way of taking over Mega City, and so do I. The Fox Clan was only slowing me down, and now I will help the Unseen rule over Mega City." Thunder pulls out his two knives and yells. "'I'll make you eat those words, you smug punk!" Ableton and Willow run into battle beside Thunder, as the three charge towards Stray. Highwire jumps in front of Stray and pulls out an Enhanced Havoc Shotgun, as she fires a shot into Thunder's chest. Thunder is knocked to the floor, as he looks at the shotgun in Highwire's hands. "That's Evie's Enhanced Havoc Shotgun! Where is Evie, you bunny-eared psycho?" Highwire points the Enhanced Havoc Shotgun at Thunder head and responds. "That's none of your concern. The Unseen should've gotten rid of your Peace Syndicate long ago." From behind, Ableton quickly Crescent Kicks Highwire and knocks her to the floor. Rinzler is then immediately shot by a blast of ice, as Stray channels some Zero Point energy into his Foxfire Edge and concentrates it into some form of an elemental attack. Ableton is frozen into an ice cube, as Willow rushes Stray with her katana, rigorously swinging at her enemy. Stray knocks Willow back, as he swings the Foxfire Edge and unleashes three ricocheting balls of Riftstorm energy. The balls ricochet around the arena, as Willow manages to dodge the attack. Amara runs into battle with Willow, as the two ladies now proceed to take down Stray and Highwire. Highwire pounces onto Amara and attempts to shred her apart with her Plasmacore Claws. Amara retaliates by whacking Highwire in the head with her Goldenbane Mace. Willow clashes with Stray, as he tries to skewer her with his Talisman. "Rip this ghost apart, Saigai Dagger Dance!" Stray summons his Talisman, as Willow evades the converging daggers and knocks Stray back. The battle is nearing its closure, with the Unseen's members on the losing end. Stray pulls out a smoke bomb and faces Willow. "You'll never win, Willow... I still have a trick or two up my sleeve..." Stray then throws the smoke bomb at his feet, as it malfunctions and releases the smoke too early. Stray begins to cough and react to the smoke bomb. "Dammit! That was not supposed to happen!" Amara immediately kicks Stray in the head and knocks him to the floor. A symbol appears above Stray, as the Kevolution Artifact begins to react. Two keys down, another two to go. Thunder faces the group and speaks. "Another key has been found. We must hunt for the others." As the Order of the Vault leaves the room with Thunder, Stray yells out. "You will not succeed! Styx will make sure of it!" Thunder then reenters the room and kicks Stray in the chest, as he then leaves the room again. Ableton looks around and comments. "Whoever Styx is, he appears to possess the next key we need. We need to move quickly. This area has a bad atmosphere." As the group wanders around the halls of The Renzone, they stumble by a room with the lights slightly dimmed. Some voices are heard inside the room. "Triarch Nox expects us to ensure that the Kevolution Artifact is back in our possession, and at full charge." Geometrik's voice is heard, as he responds. "Exactly, Bytes. Nothing that us three can't do." Bytes brushes his hair and speaks. "For we are Team Too Black, Too Strong..." Geometrik speaks after Bytes gets done. "Too black..." Zyg then immediately speaks after Geometrik. "Too strong..." Bytes then speaks after Zyg is done. "Two blacks? Two strongs?" Zyg turns to Bytes and responds. "Nox wants us in the Dark Room. It's a matter most exigent." A corrupted Rift opens in the room, as Bytes, Geometrik, Zyg, and Choppy all exit the room. Outside the room, Ableton turns to Willow and speaks. "Well... That was an interlude. We should find Styx and collect our third key." The group continues wandering the halls, until they begin hearing voices down the hall. "Hello... Is someone there?" Thunder listens out to the voice and responds. "Hold on... Evie?" Thunder slowly walks towards the origin of the voice, as Ableton responds to Thunder. "Thunder... I don't think..." As Thunder rounds a corner, he notices what appears to be Evie enclouded in some smoke. Thunder faces the anomaly and speaks. "Evie! We're here to rescue you!" Willow turns to Thunder and yells. "Thunder! That's not Evie!" The creature slowly loses Evie's shape and begins to unveil its true form, revealing it to be a Cube Monster. Splode shoves a grenade into the creature's mouth and blows it up. Thunder looks at the creature and comments. "A Mimic... Styx must be close..." The group searches the area, looking for Styx. This mysterious Unseen member must be hiding somewhere. Styx then fires a shot at Ableton and misses. Styx walks out and reveals himself to the group. He then speaks, as he lets out an unnerving grin. "Looking for Evie, Thunder? Dahlia wanted to make sure Evie is getting the dark treatment from the Unseen. You should've left our client alone." Ableton faces Styx and responds. "We're not here for your demented game, Styx. Give Evie back to us and we'll promise not to severely beat you to a pulp." Styx stares at the group and responds. "Over me and Dahlia's bodies will we even consider giving Evie to you. You Peace Syndicate scumbags always think there should be peace in Mega City. Always enforcing peace as if you call the shots around here. Let our chaos do its thing and fill Mega City with darkness." Some doors open beside Styx, as a few Cube Monsters flood into the hallway. The next battle begins. Thunder charges for Styx and attempts to tackle him, while Ableton and Willow assist in clearing out the Cube Monsters. Styx pulls out his Combat Shotgun and begins firing shots at Thunder, as he skillfully avoids the shotgun blasts. Thunder then kicks the Combat Shotgun out of Styx's hands and picks it up. Thunder fires a shot into Styx's chest and knocks him to the floor, alongside blasting his chest open. Inside Styx's chest is an orb of condensed Kevolution Materia. Ableton looks at Styx's blasted open chest and comments. "Yikes! That's some serious indigestion!" Styx gets off the ground and speaks. "Yehehehehes! Let's gohohoho!" The Kevolution Materia orb inside of Styx's chest begins to react, as he appears to be making the Cube Fiends near him stronger, turning them into Elite Cube Fiends. Thunder observes the chaos and responds. "Look out! Styx appears to be making those Cube Monsters stronger. We need to take him out before he makes those Cube Monsters too strong." With no time to waste, the Order of the Vault helps Thunder with taking down Styx. Ableton and Willow rush for Styx, as he knocks them both away with some quick shoves. Amara headshots an Elite Cube Fiend with The Dub, while CRZ-8 slices some Cube Fiends apart with his Lucky 8's. A Cubed Blightfather crawls out of the stomach of a Cube Fiend, as Styx uses the Kevolution Materia in his chest orb to turn it into an Elite Cubed Blightfather. Ableton groans in exhaustion at the sight of the Elite Cubed Blightfather. "Oh... You got to be kidding me..." Willow reacts alongside Rinzler. "Nice! Styx managed to amp up something that was already tough to kill." The Vault Guardians now have to focus on killing the Elite Cubed Blightfather before taking on Styx. Splode sticks a Clinger onto the Elite Cubed Blightfather's face, as he yells out. "Chew on that, ugly face! Yeah!" The Clinger explodes, dealing heavy damage to the Elite Cubed Blightfather and staggering it a bit. Willow then executes a quick slash of her katana at the Elite Cubed Blightfather's head, killing the bipedal terror. Thunder walls over to Styx and kicks him in the groin, knocking him to the floor. A symbol appears above Styx, as the Kevolution Artifact begins to react. One key remains, and the Order of the Vault can advance to the trials next puzzle. As the Kevolution Artifact absorbs the symbol, Styx gets up and screams, aggroing loads of Cube Monsters throughout The Renzone. A large horde of Cube Monsters run down the hall, ready to feast on the Vault Guardians and Thunder. Everyone makes a run for it, hoping to find safety from the horde. Within the horde, Stray, Highwire, and Renzo the Destroyer all chase down the Vault Guardians, alongside several Renzo units. Once they head out towards the elevator that leads into the Dark Room, Dahlia stands in front of the group and knocks everyone back with her Code Carver. The Order of the Vault are surrounded by Cube Monsters, Renzo units, and various Unseen members Ableton and Willow defeated earlier. Dahlia looks at Thunder and speaks. "Looking for Evie, Thunder? I've handed her over to a special ally of mine. He won't like it if the trial is finished before he can set anything up." Everyone is now at a standoff, as Thunder faces Dahlia. "If the Unseen chooses to be enemies to Mega City, then the Peace Syndicate will fight like we always have." Thunder pulls out his Kaiju Cutter and begins wildly attacking Dahlia. Dahlia pulls out her Lock-On Pistol and unloads half its mag into Thunder, only to miss. Thunder then roundhouse kicks Dahlia away from him, causing her to bump into Renzo. Dahlia yells out to the Cube Monsters in rage. "Don't just stand there! Kill that Peace Syndicate scum!" After Dahlia gets done yelling, Styx lets out a loud scream, as the Cube Monsters immediately run full sprint towards Thunder. Thunder pulls out his Havoc Suppressed Rifle and mows down the horde charging at him. As Thunder manages to kill the last Cube Fiend in the horde, Dahlia rushes him with her Code Cleaver, causing Thunder to retaliate with a swift kick to her face. Dahlia is knocked to the floor, as a symbol appears above her. The Kevolution Artifact reacts heavily to this, as the wall of Kevolution Materia blocking the elevator door dissipates. Thunder faces the Vault Guardians, as they all quickly get inside the elevator. Dahlia screams to the other Unseen members in anger as she watches the group enter the elevator. "Quick! Shoot them!" Stray, Highwire, Styx, Renzo the Destroyer, and the other Renzos all begin firing their guns into the elevator. Willow quickly tries to close the elevator door, as more gunfire riddles the interior. After a few more seconds of shooting, the elevator immediately breaks, causing the whole thing to begin falling at rapid speeds. Ableton looks at Thunder and yells. "Not good! The elevator took some extreme damage from that gun show!" Thunder faces Splode and screams. "Whitty! Activate the elevator's emergency brakes." Splode runs over to the buttons and begins mashing the emergency brakes button. This attempt works, as Splode successfully activates the emergency brakes and slows the elevator to its normal speed. After a few minutes, the elevator arrives at its stop. Everyone walks out of the elevator, as Ableton looks around. "Alright. I see a large tunnel with cave-live features... but where is this Dark Room?" The Kevolution Artifact reacts, as Ableton begins hearing more voices. Ableton speaks out, as the Kevolution Artifact provides the next step of the trial. "Light the Beacons..." Willow looks around after hearing what Rinzler said and comments. "Hmm... Nothing in here looks... beacon-ish, and I suspect that we fell into something worse." Everyone looks around the area, looking for anything that could help in understanding the current step in the trial. Splode uncovers a generator near some wood pallets and turns it on. Some lights on the ceiling turn on, brightening up the area a bit. Splode faces Rinzler and speaks. "I think these generators might be key to this step. We should probably find more of them and turn them on." Everyone continues walking down the tunnel, looking for more generators that Splode mentioned. Amara uncovers another generator near some large CUBE chunks, with Thunder finding another towards a pile of broken debris. More lights turn on in the area. As they near the end of the tunnel, Ableton turns the last generator on, as all the lights turn on, revealing a large steel door blocking the path. The Kevolution Artifact begins to react heavily, as the steel door opens. Once the door fully opens, the Vault Guardians enter inside. At the center of the room, there is a small, shallow body of... water? Splode walks towards the liquid and steps into it. "You know? This stuff seems pretty viscous for water, I'll tell y'all that." Willow turns to Splode and responds. "Whitty... That's not water. That's... blood..." As soon as Splode heard what Willow said, he looks below him and notices the slight redness the liquid has. Splode screams out in disgust and steps out of the liquid. Ableton looks around the area, until he hears Evie's voice yelling from above. "Guys! I'm up here!" Thunder looks up, and notices that Evie is strapped to a large machine, pumping Kevolution Materia throughout the Dark Room. Thunder yells out to Evie in response. "We're here, Evie! We're coming to get you!" Triarch Nox's voice is heard, yelling at Thunder in rage. "No, you're not!" One of Bytes' Chromatic tendrils grabs the Kevolution Artifact out of Rinzler's hands, as Bytes hands the Artifact over to Nox. Nox looks at the group and speaks. "No! Somehow those insects have passed my trial! No matter... The Kevolution Artifact has sufficient charge for what it needs to do." Triarch Nox walks up some stairs around the walls of the Dark Room, as he places the Kevolution Artifact into the device. Triarch Nox looks at the group below him and yells. "Awaken my soldiers! Slay these pawns of the Peace Syndicate!" Zyg jumps towards the blood pool at the center, as the liquid begins to transmogrify, projecting what appears to be the Mothership's interior within the liquid. Evie yells out with worry. "Watch out! It appears this Triarch Nox guy is intent on defending the device while it charges up. Don't get killed out there!" Zyg pulls out his Ray Gun and fires at the group, making sure to defend Nox's device. Ableton tries to Mantis Leap around the area to pick off Zyg, until Choppy throws down an Alien Nanite and stops Rinzler in his tracks. Thunder begins firing his Havoc Suppressed Rifle at Zyg, as he takes slight damage from Thunder's attack. Zyg then fires a laser from his eye and sweeps the floor with it, causing Thunder to jump and avoid the attack. Amara rushes into Zyg and blasts him with The Dub, launching Zyg and Choppy into the walls of the Dark Room. Zyg jumps up and out of the group's reach, as Bytes drops down. The liquid in the center transmogrifies again, as the liquid now turns Chrome. Bytes conjures the Nothing's Gift in its Siren's Spear form and begins to attack Ableton with it. Rinzler quickly dodges the attack and counterattacks by pistol-whipping Bytes in the face with his Shadow Tracker. Bytes then summons some Chromatic tendrils to attack the Vault Guardians, making sure to keep them away from him. CRZ-8 pulls out his Lucky 8 Blades and slices through the tendrils to attack Bytes. "Epicness approaches!" CRZ-8 kicks Bytes in the groin and uppercuts him onto the upper catwalk above the arena. Triarch Nox yells, as Geometrik drops down into the arena. "Intruders! Tell the Peace Syndicate I will not be stopped!" Once Geometrik drops into the arena, the liquid in the center transmogrifies again, as it begins to project the Sideways from within. Geometrik wildly swings his Sideways Scythe around, attempting to slice everyone apart. Willow grabs ahold of the Sideways Scythe and tries to wrestle it out of Geometrik's grasp. Willow succeeds, as she throws the Sideways Scythe away from Geometrik. After losing his weapon, the CUBE fragments around Geometrik begin to glow golden. Splode walks towards Geometrik with his Shrapnel Axe equipped. "This fight's in the bag. Time to beat him up and shut down the machine." Before Splode could land a hit, Geometrik fires a large laser out of his golden CUBE head and almost hits Splode. Splode immediately reacts to the attack. "What the hell? You have a new attack?!" Amara charges an attack with the Goldenbane Mace, as Serpicus the Goldenbane begins glowing on Amara's back. Geometrik charges for Amara, as she winds up with her Goldenbane Mace and whacks Geometrik in the face. The impact of the Goldenbane Mace was enough to send Geometrik crashing into the wall and losing the fight. Triarch Nox looks at the Vault Guardians and yells. "You will not deny Darkeon his return!" Triarch Nox jumps down to the arena, as Cube Monsters begin to manifest around the blood pool. Triarch Nox yells, as the Cube Monsters all turn to face the Order of the Vault. "Rise, warriors! Slay the unworthy!" The Cube Monsters charge for the Vault Guardians, as Rinzler shoots down some Cube Fiends within the horde. Willow teams up with Amara Luxe and Splode to take down a Cubed Blightfather, while Thunder slices a Corpse Eater apart with his knives. Once the Vault Guardians clear out the horde, Triarch Nox begins yelling. "No one will save you from Darkeon's wrath! I will not fail my plans!" As Nox gets done yelling, someone begins speaking from within the blood pool. "No, Nox. You did everything according to MY plan. You brought me back. And once your construct repairs my fractured body I shall thank you, by wiping this island from existence." It appears time has run out, and Darkeon has partially returned, in a slightly messed-up form. Both Stray and Highwire break into the Dark Room, as they confront the Vault Guardians. "Now you did it! You will not escape the Dark Room alive!" Darkeon sets his sights on Stray, as several clouds of Kevolution Materia fly out of the blood pool and into Stray. Stray succumbs to the Kevolution Materia, as his white coat turns black with CUBE runes all over, and his eyes start glowing purple. Darkeon begins speaking from Stray, as he yells. "Rest assured... I will destroy this world just as soon as I kill you here!" Dark Stray summons Saigai Dagger Dance, as he attempts to attack everyone with the converging daggers. Highwire runs towards the Vault Guardians in fear and speaks. "That weird... CUBE thing just took control of Stray! We gotta get him out of Stray!" Thunder faces Highwire and responds. "If we save Masaki for you, you better help us contain that Darkeon freak." Highwire nods, as the Vault Guardians get to work. Dark Stray pulls out his Kinetic Blade and dashes towards Ableton, leaving behind a burning trail of Kevolution Materia. Willow distracts Dark Stray with some yelling, causing Dark Stray to throw a plasma grenade at Willow. Willow gets away from the grenade, as the explosion leaves behind a small area of molten plasma. Dark Stray then swings his Foxfire Edge at Highwire, launching three orbs of Kevolution Materia towards her. Highwire dodges the attack and scratches Dark Stray in the chest with her Plasmacore Claws. Dark Stray kicks Highwire away, as he screams loudly. "The insanity of Darkeon is upon you!" Splode slaps Dark Stray in the face, planting a Remote Explosive beside his head. CRZ-8 throws his Billiard Grenade at Dark Stray, as the grenade splits into three explosive billiard balls. The explosion knocks Dark Stray into the air, as Splode presses the button on the Remote Explosive's detonator, blowing up the explosive on Dark Stray's face. Dark Stray is knocked out, as Darkeon seeps out of Stray and back into the blood pool. The blood pool begins to transmogrify again, as the liquid is now contaminated with Kevolution Materia. Two large arms rise out of the liquid, followed by a torso. A cracked CUBE manifests on the body, forming Darkeon's head. The entire area begins rumbling, as roots begin tearing through the walls of the Dark Room. Ableton looks around in fear and yells. "What's happening?!" Highwire faces Rinzler and responds. "He's drawing power from the Herald Tree! Nox mentioned the tree as being part of the plan, but not like this!" Loads of Cube Fiends begin manifesting around Darkeon. Amidst the rumbling, the ceiling begins to tremble. An IO Drill drops down from the ceiling and lands near the Vault Guardians. The top hatch of the IO Drill opens up, as Huntmaster Saber begins shooting at some Fiends with his Thermal Scoped Rifle. Amara faces Saber and reacts. "Saber?! How did you find us?" Saber faces Amara and responds. "No time to explain, Luxe!" Saber gets out and continues shooting the Cube Fiends around Darkeon, as Drift, Mizuki, Mystica, and Doctor Jekyll exit the Drill and help out in the fight. Darkeon begins yelling, as Mizuki begins slicing him with her Kinetic Blade. "You test my patience! I will take all your lives!" Drift then slices one of Darkeon's arms off with his Rift Edge, slowly breaking his body apart. Splode looks at the reinforcements and yells. "Hell yeah, folks! Show Darkeon how we fight!" Ableton faces Splode and reacts. "Wait... Did you call them all here, Whitty?" As Mystica attacks Darkeon with her Ashglow Blade, Splode responds. "Yes I did, Able!" Huntmaster Saber drops down to the group with Evie in his hands, after having freed her from the machine she was strapped to. Thunder faces Ableton, Willow, and Splode and speaks. "All the beacons have been lit. You've done the impossible. You've united this city. And reminded us that we need each other." Evie turns to Thunder and responds. "So, how do we feel about making Splode's friends here honorary members of the Peace Syndicate?" Thunder faces Evie and answers her. "Of course. And you're getting your own signature menu item at the Thunder Roll." The entire Dark Room begins to fall apart, as Jekyll yells. "The area is collapsing! Everyone to the Drill!" Everyone immediately piles into the IO Drill, as Highwire quickly grabs Stray's unconscious body and gets in. Triarch Nox tries to get into the IO Drill, as Jekyll reacts to him. "Stay here and die, you bracket-faced trickster!" Jekyll kicks Nox away and shuts the hatch, as Saber maneuvers the IO Drill into the wall and begins drilling everyone's way out. Darkeon's body begins to crumble, as the Dark Room collapses due to all the roots overgrowing in the area. Inside the IO Drill, Evie responds to Thunder's earlier answer to her. "How about the City Saver Supreme? You could make that roll a lunch special! Ooh! How about Hero Meat? Just a big piece of meat with the word 'HERO' cooked into it." Thunder turns to Evie and responds to her. "Hey, who's chef around here? You stick to playing with knives." Evie reacts to what Thunder has said. "Haha, deal! Don't need to tell me twice." Evie turns to Ableton, Willow, and Splode and speaks to them. "If you ever need any backup... We owe you one. Call us, and we'll be there!" Evie then throws up a peace sign at the Vault Guardians. "Keep the peace, heroes." Willow tightly hugs Rinzler, as they enjoy their ride within the IO Drill. Above ground, near the fault line adjacent to a gas station, Xander Necalli, Marigold, Grimey, and Gnash all observe the roots sprouting around the fault line. Xander faces Marigold and comments. "Ooh... These mysterious roots. Something is happening to Asteria, and I'm not sure what." Marigold turns to Xander and responds. "I'm not sure either. Grimey noticed these earlier, and had me come over to check." Gnash looks around and comments. "Well... This has been an eventful evening, Necalli. Can we go now? This place just doesn't feel right." As Xander and his mercenaries prepare to leave, Xander faces the roots and whispers. "Will you take me closer to el Punto Cero?" Evie has been rescued, the Unseen has been trampled, and Nox's plans on bringing back Darkeon have been foiled. This turned into quite a spectacular display of teamwork and mayhem for me and Willow. Although... This does leave a major question for us to figure out... What exactly did Darkeon do with those roots? Whatever he did, it will prove to be something... Wild... for me and Willow.

My 15 yr old Naos backpack finally gave in, despite glue repairs in my separate thread. It was originally marketed for backpacking use but I've mostly abused it in alpine snow/ice/rock environments and it performed wonderfully. I love this pack so it was rather underwhelming to seek a replacement in the current Arcteryx backpack lineup. Alpha FL is very limited in its use case and hasn't seen significant upgrades in a while. The new Bora is exactly the same as it was before it disappeared years ago, no new features. I ended up with Alpha AR 55 and it is... meh. Its design and quality were more like Black Diamond than what I'd expect from Arcteryx.
What happened to the braintrust behind the novel innovations and proprietary technologies it pioneered in the 2000's e.g. thermoformed shouldehip straps, AC2 fabric, roto hip belt, etc. Heck, it was even featured in one of the Bourne movies. All of the packs from that decade still look rather advanced compared to everything from any brand right now.
Sure, Arcteryx has shifted focus to its clothing, fashion collabs, shoes, and trail running. But harnesses and backpacks were what really differentiated the brand in my experience. It put the brand on a whole other level, far beyond Patagucci, OR, Black Diamond, Cilo, Hyperlite, etc. Rather disappointed in my new Alpha AR 55, so I wrote to their customer care and the response was basically, yeah whatever we'll pass it on.
Thoughts or insights?

Does anyone know where I can find the shoulder rests that strap around the body and keeps the violin up without the chin rest? I’m looking to find one because I’m a multi-instrumentalist and it’d be easier for me to play violin along with other instruments if I can swap quickly between them. They often appear with electric violins less so than typical ones.

I woke up at the sound of a woman’s voice asking me the question. The voice was familiar, but only a little. Had I just met her? Where were we at? I was on a bed, wasn’t I? Had we…
…fucked everything up when the railroad closed down the line through Tulson. I don’t know if that was true or not. Other than big shipments that were too heavy for planes or trucks, did anyone use trains any more? Either way, it was five years to the day that they ran the last train down the track that the killings started and no one could leave town anymore.
They called it the Death Train, which made no sense for a number of reasons. First of all, it wasn’t a train. It was Harvey Stark in his old conductor’s outfit, riding around on Jeff Humbolt like he was a prize-bull. Stark was a little guy, sure, and Jeff was built like a brick shithouse, so he could tote Stark around on his shoulders with no problem. If that was all it was, people would have snickered and went about their day.
But Jeff had on one of those strap-on head lamps and Stark had that whistle he would start blowing when he felt the need to warn someone that the train was coming. Except instead of a train, it was a 400 pound naked man, shaved clean and slick with sweat, a machete in each hand, and a hard erection in-between, making Goddamn train noises while the little fucker on his back tooted that horn and spurred him on like a prize stallion.
You’d think people would see it coming and run away, but no. The first three or four just stood there, staring in confusion as the pair Master Blastered their way toward them and started hacking them to bits. By that point the police had tried to stop them, but nothing put them down or even seemed to hurt them for long. The cops had fired until the train turned its glowing eye on them, and then even the ones that tried to run got run down. The next day, we found forty or so bloody and deformed bullets in the street, like the old Death Train had just shit them back out. Maybe it had.
But none of this made sense did it? I didn’t live in this place, and yeah, I knew and remembered all this stuff, but what kind of nonsense was it? And had it really happened to me or was all of it just a dream I needed to…
“…wake up, man! I’m trying to give you a chance here.”
I gasped as a small hand slapped me across my face. “Wha? Jesus! What’s going on?”
A small lamp turned on next to me and I saw the girl sitting on the edge of the bed, her eyes narrowed as she stared at me. I remembered her. She was cute. I’d met her at the bar and…
“Snap out of it, okay? You awake? You with me?”
I felt myself wanting to go back to sleep, but fought the urge. She might slap me again. “I’m awake. You hit me.”
Rolling her eyes, she let out a sigh. “Do you feel something crawling on you?”
My eyes widened as I realized I did. Panicking, I began frantically brushing of my chest. “What is it, get it off me…I…I don’t see anything.”
She nodded. “Oh, it’s there, we just can’t see it or touch it this early. But you’ve got bigger issues. What you were just in? It’s called a Hatter’s Dream. It’s not a normal dream and if you let yourself, you can get trapped there. Lose your mind there.”
I stared at her. “What? How? Why?”
She started to speak and then lowered her gaze before she went on. “The short version is that I roofied you. We didn’t have sex or anything, I just…drew on you.” She gestured to a spot on my arm. There was a small black circle connected to a black rectangle that flared out at the bottom.
“What…you drew…what is that?” The woman gave a little laugh as she held up her hand to show a similar, more refined tattoo on the back. “It’s um, it’s a keyhole. I’m just not much of an artist. Just made it with a marker and, well, a bit of my blood and spit mixed in.”
I pushed away from her as I sat up more in the bed. “What the fuck? What are you sick with?”
Her expression was unreadable as she met my eyes. “Me? Nothing now, I mean, thanks to you. It’s not like a normal disease. It moves around but doesn’t leave anything behind. You give it with a keyhole and um, the spit and blood thing.”
I started shaking my head. “You’re fucking crazy.”
She laughed again. “No, I don’t think so, not anymore. It stopped crawling on me as soon as I put myself into the drawing. But my father was crazy. He was crazy for nearly two years before I would listen to him.” I saw she was crying now. “He told me these stories about a madness he’d found, not a problem with the brain or the mind, but a living thing that hunted and crawled from person to person until they were drained dry. When I finally got desperate enough to have him back, I started to pay attention, and it didn’t take long before I believed. He wanted me to help him escape the hospital so he could find someone to give it to, but I knew that would never work. And…and I could see his grip was slipping.” She wiped at her eyes. “So I finally convinced him to teach me what needed to be done and give it to me, just for a little while. He made me promise to find someone cruel and evil that deserved it, but how do I know? And I couldn’t stand feeling it on me, knowing that it was burrowing into my brain.”
I shuddered. She was right. I could feel it still, like a faint breeze that wasn’t there, not just on my chest, but in the dark behind my eyes. Rustling around, feeling for cracks and wounds to exploit. “Jesus. Stop.”
She grabbed my hand. “No. You need to understand. I need you to understand so you have a chance. I didn’t do this to fuck you up or ruin your life. It’s not personal. I did it to save me and my Dad. And you can do the same thing that I did, and maybe you can find someone that actually deserves it. Just stay awake. Get tons of caffeine or pills or whatever.”
I grabbed her arm back, my teeth clenched. “Why don’t I just put it back in you?”
She shook her head as she waved her other hand again. “It won’t work. Dad says it won’t take the same keyhole twice.” Standing up, she pulled away and stepped to the other side of the room. “Still, I figured you’d be pissed. That’s why I’m going to leave before the roofie is gone enough for you to chase me.”
I tried to move my legs and she was right. They were there and I could feel them, but everything still felt loose and liquid below my waist. “You fucking bitch.”
The woman nodded. “Yeah, I guess I am. And I am sorry. Good luck.” And then she was gone.
It was another thirty minutes before I could get up and walk to the door. We’d been in a cheap motel room not far from a bar I remembered going to, but this late all the buses were gone and taxis were few and far between. I wound up sitting on a bench for nearly an hour waiting for a rideshare to come, dipping in and out of strange dreams the entire time.
I debated calling the police, but I wasn’t sure what to tell them. And it was embarrassing. Drugged by some cute but insane woman that drew on me and made up some bizarre story? I decided to just get home, get some sleep, and decide what to do the next morning.
Except I didn’t wake up the next morning. Instead it was three days later, I was laying in a bed covered with dried piss and shit, and I was so dehydrated that I had to crawl to the bathroom to drink out of the toilet because I couldn’t reach the sink. I remembered where I’d been.
It wasn’t just one place. Some of the time I was back in the town that was being terrorized by the Death Train. Other times I was underground somewhere, crawling through a tunnel littered with wrappers and bits of candy. I spent several hours in a building with fleshy walls that bled when you touched them and groaned with every step you took. Something lived in those walls and was after me, so I had to keep moving despite the stink and the noise and the blood. On and on through one terrible thing and then another, and the entire time, my unseen invader was crawling all over me, probing me and lightly biting as though testing the flavor of its newfound meat.
I say all of this because I want you to understand that I believe you now. And I want you to know that, like you said, it’s not personal.
“It’s not going to work, I already told you!”
I laugh a little, turning on the headlamp so I can see better in the darkened room I finally found her holed up in after weeks of tracking her down. “I disagree. I’ve given it a lot of thought. I can still give it to you, I just need to get rid of your little keyhole.”
She was crying hard now as she tried to pull free from her restraints. “It’s a tattoo. He made me get a tattoo so I couldn’t get it back after I got rid of it.”
I grinned at her, stinging sweat streaming into my eyes, but that was okay. The pain made everything sharper. Just like the machete. I made it extra sharp for a clean cut. I pulled the blade out from my rucksack and she began to struggle harder.
“Then he should have told you to put it somewhere less expendable.”
“No, no, no!”
I could hardly hear her screaming as a piercing whistle filled my ears. Raising the blade in both hands, I took a small practice chop before lining up the final cut. It would all be over soon enough, and would I miss it? I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t of two minds about it.
Tightening my grip on the sweat-slicked handle, I let out a bellow as I brought it down. It wasn’t as terrible and musical as the high-pitch trilling in my ears, but it still felt right.
“Choo choo CHOO!”

This is really just a trauma dump.
(please correct me if I've made a mistake regarding the rules and excuse my writing)
My parents provided me with a good childhood, it was a little rocky and mistakes were made, but I had everything a child could need, and I am grateful for that. I did however have some bad experiences between the ages of 4 and 7 and it left me a little messed up.
My grandma worked at our communities' daycare and watched over me and my sister. I suffer from short-term memory loss, so I have forgotten most of my time there. I do however remember the punishments I would receive for misbehavior. I am not talking about the spankings or time spent facing the wall, but the weird punishments my grandma would inflict upon me whenever we were alone.
She would force me into a high chair and slam the tray cover on my fingers if I tried to stop it. She would leave me there until I stopped crying but if I didn't she would usually return with a bottle of mustard and a spoon. I hated the stuff, so she would force my jaw open or plug my nose so she could forcefully spoon-feed me. I remember her yelling and spitting in my face, the clanging of the mental spoon against my teeth. If I spat it out she would slap me across the face, never enough to leave a mark. The worst part for me was when she'd drag the highchair into a small janitor's closet and leave me in there with the lights turned off and the door locked until I stopped crying
I still remember how much the straps hurt my shoulders and the pitch-black darkness. I would soothe myself by imagining elaborate scenarios in my head where my dad would bravely swoop in to save me.
During grades 1 and 2, my parents would drop me off at the daycare after school while they finished work. No matter how hard I cried and protested, they wouldn't listen. I still don't know why I didn't give them the real reason why I didn't want to go but it didn't matter since my parents just assumed I was simply being a child.
This all finally came to an end once my mom's mom caught my grandma in the act. I don't remember how it went down but years later I was told she found me in the closet. My parents were informed and I was removed from the daycare. After that, my parents began fighting and I blamed myself for the divorce my mother was considering due to my dad shrugging off the situation. It broke my heart to find out that my dad, the hero I imagined kicking down that closet door and taking me away from that miserable closet, didn't see any issue. I didn't learn the context until I got older but my parents worked it out since then and I do not blame my dad for his actions since he was just another victim in this whole situation. After all that, life just kinda went on like nothing happened. I'd visit my grandma for dinners and holidays, we'd hug and say we love each other. she would still dish out punishments but nothing like what she did before. I would casually bring up the experience and make a joke of it. I assumed I had gotten over it since I no longer hated the taste of mustard.
I am now a hypersensitive 22-year-old and my grandma is dead. Over the last few years, I've been diagnosed with GAD, ADHD, and a Binge-eating disorder. I am also currently being screened for BPD. Every day is a rollercoaster of emotions, I can go from feeling empty and disconnected from the world to feeling every negative emotion at once. I smoke weed and drink to drown out the shame and disgust I feel for missing the attention and hurt I felt. I also believe those events somehow lead to me finding comfort in dark enclosed spaces and developing an interest in Feederism later in my pre-teens.
I hate that that happened and I hate the person I've become, but I guess things could have been worse.

For sale are the following items below. Located in Toronto, local deals preferred but willing to ship for up-front payment. Package deals available if you buy multiple items. I know it's a bit of a grey area here, but I also have paintball gear available if someone is interested. PM me for details.
VFC/Umarex MP5A3 Retractable Stock - $100 - Pic 1 - Pic 2
Purchased to put on a GSG-16, but didn't end up fitting. Hoping to recoup some of the sunken cost. Never used in any way other than trying to fit it on.
CPGear CADPAT Woodland Insulated Hydration Carrier and Hose Cover $100 - Pic 1 - Pic 2
Used but good condition. There is a bladder, but this one has been sitting around for a while so I would recommend replacing it. But I can include it if the purchaser so desires. Price is reduced to reflect the bladder being not recommended for use.
CPGear CADPAT Woodland Modular Hydration Carrier $120 - Pic 1 - Pic 2
The non-insulated version. Comes with a bladder, this one is much newer and has been cleaned and cared for. Carrier can be worn with shoulder straps, or attached to a vest with molle clips (not included). Can negotiate a lower price if you'd rather get your own bladder.
Condor Compact Assault Pack $50 - Pic 1 - Pic 2
Nice little bag, good for a hydration bladder and some snacks, maybe an extra layer. Could make a good trauma bag out of it too. Not a cheap Amazon knockoff, this one's made with cordura and definitely rugged.
Thanks for looking!