Hi, I have had a little mongrel (yorkie, Jack Russel, pom mix) named Shadow since 2014, and a little Maltese named Zero since 2021. We bought both as puppies.
Me and my mom have had Shad since 2014 and he has always had pretty bad separation anxiety, barking and howling when we leave it wasn't too bad but it was distressing to him. Last November mom bought Zero after we had a noise complaint about Shad howling. She thought Shad's issue was being home alone and another dog might calm him down because he is no longer all alone in the house.
He stopped howling at least but lately Shad started biting our jeans and pulling at them when we leave and this is a bigger issue because he sometimes catches our skin when we wear tighter clothing. We are worried that this behaviour will be transferred to guests in the house.
Shad also has poor eyesight and pees in the house often. He won't go bark to go out and sometimes pees in the house right after he comes back inside.
Unfortunately, Mom has tried to use dominance theory on him because that's all she knew and "it worked when she was kid" when I was younger (I was 13 when we bought Shad) I copied her because I assumed she knew what she was doing). I know now this is really wrong and damaging to Shad (As well as point blank clearly failing to do anything at all) and I am ashamed to admit to it but I'll give any information that may impact your advice.
Advice would be greatly appreciated. Shad is my first dog. My mom owned many when she was young.

(So I guess this is sorta an update to my last post but it gets worse.)
So like I stated last time I know I'm severely mentally ill and 15 but my mom keeps telling me "jokes" about sending back to the mental hospital. For a bit more detail go to the last post. So I tried to talk to her the next day we got into a fight. She again only made the whole thing about her. I brought up the fact her and my dad blamed me for a teacher calling DCF when they found belt marks on me when she said my life was perfect. She went from "well you should have been more responsible you did get in trouble" to "I had to deal with DCF that whole time because you had to tell your teacher, what goes on in the house stays in the house you know this" and then to "I went through worse in my childhood your lucky yours is better, I'm way better then my parents be thankful". After a while I was too emotional so my body shut down and I went mute, the argument died down there. Until she got a book and told me to read it, I looked at the book and already knew what this was about. The book is called "the child named it". For those who don't know the book is about a poor boy who went through the worse abuse you can think of by his mother. First time I was told to read it, it made me puke and cry due to the horrors I read. She was trying to make me read it again so I can quote "see what actual abuse is since I wanna play the victim". I remember the first time finishing the book and she said "now you know what actual abuse is, what your going through is nothing compared to me your dad and that boy is it? That's what I thought now suck it up and be great full I'm not like that your really pushing me though." I am refusing to read the book simply because I can't stomach what happens in the book and I know what's she's trying to do and I don't wanna deal with it.
And before anyone says "your mom isn't that bad you sound like a teen who complains about anything" I'll tell you some things I went through personally. At age 12 I had a diary my mom found and read said diary, she got mad that I was complaining about living Ina run down house that's constantly falling apart. I was beaten and forces to clean that house because I was lying. When I was 13 I had a art table one day I forgot to tidy the table. My parents threw all my art projects to the ground and ripped papers up causing me to lose so much art stuff. Once I was crying in tears I accidentally raised my voice so they could hear me asking them to stop. I was pushed against the wall and at the end had a black eye and bloody nose. When they told me to run away they don't care I packed up and went to leave my mom grabbed me by my ear and pulled me inside calling me a "stupid bitch ". When my dog at the time ran away and we couldn't find him I was crying so bad I threw up, instead of comforting me they smoked weed then blew it into my face to "calm me down". When my uncle choked me and I got ahole of my mom who was at work telling her what happened she told me to "go apologize to my uncle". That's not even all of it my mom would punch me dead in the face when I forgot dishes in the sink. So much more so I think I'm not over acting, and yes I'm already planning on moving out as soon as I turn 16. I'll drop out of highschool get my GED and a job, I have found a dog friendly apartment and many jobs I can take that pay well with little to no work experience. (Even though I have lots of work experience Ive had jobs before).

Used to we (both 20 years old) would try new places. We’ve been together almost 3 years and when we go out to eat now, we always go to the same chicken restaurant.
I just want variety. it makes no sense. I NEVER get to pick where we eat. It’s always the damn chicken restaurant or he will go to it without me, so I end up going.
He used to be even pickier. As a kid he only would eat plain hot dogs without the bun or any condiments. LUCKILY I got him to love sushi. But he doesn’t care to try anything new. I tell him he might love other Asian foods as much as he loves sushi but he just doesn’t care to try anything.
Im south Korean (boyfriend is white) but I enjoy lots of food. It’s one of the best parts of life in my opinion, enjoying different foods from other cultures. My favorite is probably Korean food. i also love Indian food, Japanese. I like Thai, Vietnamese, Italian, Mexican. I love birria tacos. Would love to try senegalese or Jamaican food someday
I wanna try many more dishes but my boyfriend likes to eat the same chicken sandwich. I’m just so tired of going to the same restaurant. I would be fine if I never went there again.
Since my mom passed away, I like to eat Korean food on the day she passed. Last year in memory of my mom he didn’t wanna go to a Korean restaurant even though I said I would pay for the check, so I just ordered Korean takeout and he got Wendy’s or something.
Am I dumb for getting upset over this? we get sushi on Valentine’s Day, but other than that it’s fast food or the chicken restaurant. It doesn’t matter what I say, it’s always the chicken restaurant.
Also yes i could go out to eat by myself but I don’t. I also don’t have any friends to go with. I know I should make friends but it’s hard lol
TLDR; what the title says. He just wants to eat at the same chicken restaurant and has told me he doesn’t want to try new restaurants, and it irritates me!

Background: BPD/PTSD, i lost my duaghter in infancy at about 2 months old, she was born very sick but fullterm (40w1d), her father abandoned me to host her memorial alone in my hometown and I’ve been hanging by a therad ever since, i see a truama specialized therapist and have been hospitalized where I couldn’t even take my adderal because they labeled it as bad for being a schedule drug despite the grogginess and scatterbrains it leaves me with. I live in South Carolina USA where i don’t have many other options. Help: I’ve tried at least 12 different psychological medications, I can’t take SSRIs due to them causing lactation which is incredibly triggering since i pumped for my daughter and i just simply cannot expect to live and deal with that. I’m fighting back and forth with a ketamine clinic and insurnace to attempt spravato but it seems like this is going to take forever. Cannabis helps the aftermath of emotions from a breakdown but will only delay anything I try to repress or ignore. I’ve tried EDMR, too, which doesn’t help either. I remember every second of her life, i have no problems with memory of that. Its the fact I can’t carry these memories around with me everywhere. But unfortunately I can’t help that i do. It feels hopeless, I can’t travel to find shrooms and it feels like there’s nothing out there that will save me. What do yall do in the waiting period for treatment when everything seems lost. Ive done all the healthy habits, i exercised at one point everyday for a few weeks until I stopped due to the fact it was making me breakdown as i would work out, making it worse. I drink the water, i eat healthy, i have a dog. I’ve tried everything within my own power and it seems like its a dead end to get better.

Aside from story. Which kinda carries the game for me when you finish the story you have nothing left to do. Here is why I think this game is bad.
1- Community... Yeah this game has a garbage community Its filled with 12 yr olds tryna build their harem when u call them on that their excuse usally is "I am collecting" - %95 of them minimum you can find them in their natural habitats they are commonly found in youtube and discord watch that hu tao video and you will get what I mean I see comments like "When she opens her mouth my wallet goes🤑🤑🥰🥰" Sick people..
2- Gameplay... I mentioned this earlier. When the story "ends" you have nothing to do. I talked people about this and you know what they said? "Explore the map" This is stupid bro why would I explore a map that I already did dozens of times. "There are fun events" its 90% puzzles and who can break keyboard fastest challanges there are nothing creative. You do spiral abyss 7/24 hoping for a good artifact, do daily comissions then log what a fun game.
3- Dog Water Combat .. No matter what you say this game has dog water combat. Switch characters spam all your ults and abilities when they are on cooldown spam m1 great combat mechanics we got here. Enemies just stand there goofing around. after boosting yourself with artifacts and abilites u go reckess, tanking all the damage doing nothing but spamming m1 after you run out of abilites. Which doesnt require skill at all.
4- Gacha System I do not like that "50/50 rule" its super dumb and pisses off f2p players not everyone is a no life who plays this crap 7/24 nor they spend their life savings on it. "Yeah u wasted that 14k for nothing but dont worry u are getting that waifu next time" is what game says to u. Its hardly a game wishing matters but this is still annoying.

Sometimes I wish I had IRL polyamorous friends that were not directly involved in my polycule, or friends with them-- just an objective/unbiased sounding board. but i guess that's what reddit is for!
I've been poly for about 1yr 3months now, and started dating my partner about 6 months after coming out of a 14yr monog relationship. The previous relationship did not end well (red flags and lying ignored for years) and left me with a lot of emotional scars and trust issues that I still find myself navigating today (not feeling like enough, feeling like too much, not wanting to be needy, making myself small to avoid my feelings when I’m anxious, you know the drill).
To lay it out: My polycule is me, my partner (who is a hinge), his long-time nesting partnemy meta (also a hinge), and her partner. We've been practicing KTP for most of this relationship journey. We've got an established Google calendar with planned times for our own dates(based on work schedules), and hang out all together a few times a month. I’m glad to say these are people I would want to be friends with even outside of our poly dynamic.
One of my biggest continuous struggles has been managing my ability to give space for my partner and meta to continue nourishing their relationship, while still connecting with my partner:
My partner and I generally spend Friday Saturday together with most Sunday mornings, and Wednesday evenings. I always appreciate having my space to myself once that time is over, and knowing that my partner and meta will be reconnecting at their home, I tend to give space (not so much texting, rarely call)— not an issue.
My meta has started posting more pics of our partner, her partner on Instagram, just generally being more open about it, and on Monday, she posted pics from a hike with our partner, and just other sweet photos of them kissing, and I found myself momentarily in my feels. It passed as I remembered that these are things he happily does with me, and found solace in the fact he is a loving person. But as this has been happening more, I do occasionally feel that pang, that insecure thought of "maybe their relationship is more romantic than ours". but i know it's not a competition.
I don’t usually call my partner during the workday but Tuesday (3/21), I did during my lunch bc I wanted to hear his voice. He had texted me asking how my morning was and I thought I’d call instead since I had the time. When he answered, I could pick up on the tone of his voice that he was not expecting it, kind of like in a way that seemed like I was interrupting. So I immediately felt a little on edge. We chatted for a bit; they had just had a late breakfast and were going to try to take the dog out for a walk before it rained again. About 8 minutes in, he said “…well anyways, thanks for calling me!..” and I felt so awkward, feeling like I was being pushed off the phone and said “… you’re welcome..?” because I didn’t know what else to say, my disappointment and hurt seeping in. It was an uncomfortable goodbye as we exchanged “I love yous” and hung up.
Here are the levels: I understand that weather timeframes meant they needed to do the walk soon. Sometime he’ll walk the dog and talk with me on the phone, but I knew they had committed to walking together which means he wouldn’t be on the phone.
However, I was hurt, given the very short cutoff phone call, that there wasn’t an offer instead of “hey I got to get going now, but let’s chat later okay?”, instead of what felt like a brush off. It felt like indirect communication (which I'm finding myself more and more frustrated with in general, with everyone). Don’t thank me for calling you like I offered you a job position! Just tell me you gotta go, for the love of god. I know I would have felt 10x better if the hang up was communicated that way. Additionally, I was upset that I didn’t hear from him the rest of the day. No text, no call, just a love you good night text at 11pm like nothing ever happened. That said, I didn’t reach out, or ask him to talk later so that’s on me too I guess.
Where my "scars" come into play :
I don’t like feeling needy. Some anxious/codependency habits and criticisms from the last relationship have led to me swinging in the opposite direction of avoidance. So to put myself in this sort of vulnerable place of reaching out where I wouldn’t normally, and to be met with this… it hurt a little extra. And made me feel instinctively like I needed to withdraw more, as if to prove to myself that I don’t need anybody, because (and this is my "brain demon" talking) if I don't put myself out there, then I won't get hurt, otherwise, look what happens ("he doesn't want you, to talk to you, to connect with you, etc, leave him alone"). And communicating my needs is hard too -- they so frequently fell on deaf ears before, that it can still be hard to not feel bad about it when I try or need to now.
This feeling seems to be one of my biggest internal battles. It's not an intentional cry for attention, but I end up hurting myself (when I really want connection) and hurting others (by going into avoidant mode) with it. It's like I can see it happening but I can't make myself stop. It's something my partner and I have talked about before, and he's said in the past "if you want to call, just call! If I can't answer, I'll call you back. You're not bothering me."
EDIT:
We haven't talked about this moment, because I haven't seen him. Today is Wednesday (3/22), and I sent a morning text, he sent a morning text and asked how my sleep was. i texted that I don't feel like pretending i'm fine today, but that I also don't really want to get into it over text. And he said "its ok. i understand". I haven't messaged back....I just don't have the energy for it and I don't feel like crying about it.
And that's where we are now. I'm not sure about evening plans. I feel like a coward. I'm still upset. I feel like I'm always the one struggling in this dynamic but I recognize that this is still new concept for me, even a year later.
TLDR: Compersion does not always come naturally, and I get scared I'll always have that internal comparison eating my confidence away. It still hurts when some bad communication happens and you end up feeling like an option, rather than a choice, even if that may not have been the intention. Attachment trauma is my biggest challenge in polyamory. Can someone please validate that I'm not the only one that feels this way? Or share their experiences?

My boy would have been 13 on Friday. Last April we found some lumps on his hind quarters and under one of his front legs and the vet said they were cancerous, since then I’ve been dreading the day of putting my best friend down. I had him since he was 7 months old and he was seriously the best dog I could have ever asked for. Monday he just couldn’t stand on his own anymore and he’s been needing help up most of the time for about a month now, even on rugs(we have wood floors throughout except for area rugs and a runner in the hall). Monday afternoon I tried to help him up and he let out a sound of pain I’ve never heard before and I got him to lie down and I collapsed next to him bawling knowing boy was in serious pain. My wife and I made the decision when she got home from work and we had a vet come to our house last night. It was peaceful, though hurts like hell still, and I’ve gone through 4 boxes of tissue, but I know he’s no longer in pain. Until we meet again Ziggy Stardust.
My question is, we have another dog that just turned 12, she can still get up even off wood floor and she’s had a bad hip since she was a puppy. I’m worried about her since he’s gone. They were serious companions. Wife and I have talked about waiting for our next dogs before we lost the first, but is that the right thing? I suppose the good thing is she does seem fairly independent and I think a few screws are loose, so maybe she doesn’t understand what happened. Just looking for what others have done.

*Will delete sooner than later *
I’m on Bumble and Tinder. My profiles state the truth: homeownegood careemy extracurricular activities/dog loveetc. I’m not some super huge catch, but clearly I have some good things going for me.
Regarding looks, I’m no Brad Pitt, but I’m at least decent looking and in shape too. I will add that I’m not tall (5’8”), but honestly that has never affected my self-image or confidence.
Now the rant… I get very few matches on either app and the ones I do get, I never get a response on Tinder, and on Bumble, I never get a message (women make the first move on Bumble).
Reddit though… post a dick pic (admittedly it’s fun) and holy shit, at least 3-5 messages from women essentially saying how they’d like to have their way with it.
WTF?!?!! Women need to quit saying shit to men like “size doesn’t matter, it’s your personality” and “we don’t want to see your dick.” What the hell do you want then? Obviously it’s not my personality or companionship as they all say. FFS, yes I’ll happily give a woman the D just like every other guy (small, average, or big), but the truth is for me, I’m pretty modest and no woman that I take out or go on a date with is ever going to know unless we make it to the bedroom.
Simply put, I’d like to go on a date because of who I am, because of my personality, career, and the things I do outside of work, because that’s what supposedly matters to women 🙄🙄🙄. Yeah, this stuff gets me nowhere…and outside of Reddit, where no one will ever see my face or know my name, I don’t and never will be whipping it out like show and tell or something… no woman I meet will ever know my size, again unless we make it to the bedroom…. And reiterating, my personality, goals, and achievements aren’t getting me in there.

I’m not even going to say how long it’s been no contact. It’s been forever. I thought I was doing better. But I’m missing my dogs and remembering the happy times. And the sad times where I disappointed the person I loved more than anything. And then my stomach begins to turn; and breathing becomes harder, and my only coping mechanism is posting on Reddit because I have literally no friends IRL.
hey op make some friends
Yeah try making friends with my personality and tell me that again. There was a reason I thought her being with me was a miracle to begin with. My whole life people has thought of me as strange. Even now my peers say “I can’t believe you’re real”. Lol. Kill me. Sometimes just want someone to kill me.

Long story short: I was taking my trash out at my apartment complex when an unleashed dog ran up behind me and bit my hand: 9 puncture wounds, all bleeding. A man came running to get control of the dog. He said it was his girlfriend’s dog and that he didn’t live there, but he gave me his number to contact him. I got back home and attempted to contact him. I received a call from a Google Voice burner number from the owner of the dog: she accused me of trying to pick up her dog (she was not present at the scene) and when I asked her for the dog’s vaccination records, she vaguely told me “my attorney will handle things.” And she hung up.
I tried calling her again with no answer, then texted her asking for her name and when I can expect the vaccination information (rabies shots, if needed, must be administered within 24 hours). She says she cannot get me the vaccination records because her vet is closed. I tell her she can pull the information from the pet screening registry app we have to use when we move in or send me a picture of the dog’s rabies tag. She refuses to give me her name, accuses me of harassing her, and blocks me. Overnight while I’m sleeping, she unblocks me and sends me a picture of a vet vaccination receipt: except her name, the dog’s breed information, and the vet information is redacted. I have no way of verifying whether or not that receipt is from the dog that bit me.
I had to seek medical care, with antibiotics and a tetanus vaccination, with the possibility of an infection or other complications from the injury. I would expect her to the liable for those expenses, but I do not know any information about her. I also cannot verify for certain that the dog that bit me was vaccinated for rabies by calling the vet because I don’t have that information. By law: has she fulfilled her legal requirements of providing me a heavily redacted receipt of vaccination records? Or am I entitled to her and the dog’s information should I need to hold her reliable for medical expenses?
Edit: i reported the incident to my apartment management office, and they promised me they would investigate - but they also told me it’s a very big complex with 2,000 residents and could not promise they would be able to identify the dog. They also tried to reassure me that all dogs on the property are up to date on vaccinations, but I have reason to suspect the dog might not be registered with the apartment.

This past Saturday I had a good book, started a new meditation class and was taking a walk to get snacks with my boys. I already had the desire to get a few beers as I had relapsed last week and I had a normy night with friends and I had fun. I got these ciders that come from the same brand I drink kombucha from. Yes kombucha sober my plan was serious harm reduction in my life so that my family would remain in tact. It was over a good three years of not drinking alcohol other then a few kombuchas a year. I started at 11 or 12 and drank a cider over 12.5%. It slowly warmed me and I went on my phone and first post I see is my partner and his female best friend from Texas posting about him and how proud she is of him and me have accomplished. It was sweet albeit I’m bothered due to feeling like my partner doesn’t like me. Doesn’t like to watch the tik toks I send him and watches his best friends. Jealous little fight that made him throw the couch or rather flip it while I was on it so I could fall. I kept telling him to get away from me as I tried to Call my mom and get some advice. I kept asking him to get away from me, but he wouldn’t and I started to drink more of this cider. It was drama from that point forward he claimed to have tried to kill himself by hanging, which I believe now was a manipulation, so I wouldn’t be as mad at him. he was on his knees, begging me to hit him because he deserved it to hit him because he knew I wanted to well I asked him to get away get away get away. Eventually, I was on third cider, and I forgot to mention also on an antidepressant and so I started getting really hazy although I was texting so many people and keeping track of events that way and I remember grabbing a screwdriver, holding it to my throat and threatening to stab myself if he didn’t leave me alone. Like I said, it’s hazy, but I woke up in my bedroom with police officers in the room, and I was taken outside in sandals, and a light sweater while they talk to him. He told them I had slapped him and pulled his hair and so they arrested me on domestic violence and child neglect since my children were in the room. They were also in the room when he flipped the couch on me. The police officers didn’t take a statement from me. I’ve learned my partner or x partner visited the domestic violence center when I’ve never been violent, never hurt my children I relapse this one time I was with the wrong person and now I have a restraining order until Friday. I have spent every single day with my children as a stay at home mom and now I can’t even call them. My parents we’re on their way usually it’s a 7 to 10 Hour Dr. to get from where they are to where I live 2 to 3 hours into driving my partner called my family to ask them to turn around and that we would figure it out and it would be all fine. And then he put out a restraining order against me for a week so I couldn’t see my children or him. I was released at six in the morning on a Sunday with no wallet no phone in 20 degree weather. He knew I had no one to pick me up so I had to ask a random man I met at a gas station for a ride and thankfully he was really nice. I got to my cities police station and asked for an escort so I could pick up some items and a car. I saw my boys for a brief 15 minutes. It’s been so cruel the past few days my heart feels broken and stabbed. The irony of it all Was that he had gotten arrested for a five years ago in which I paid for his bail and his lawyer and picked him up. I never should have laid hands on him, and frankly don’t remember, but I do remember being taunted and asked everyone thinks that this was a set up. He saw that I was drinking and knows that I have a problem and escalated to the point where he hoped I would end up in jail and I did, but only for one night.
I’ve felt crazy the past few years with manipulations he’s done to me. A part of me feels relief to be free from him but to be a part from my children tears at my soul
Tldr: got arrested for dv when I’m pretty sure it was defense at that point and all the little lies he told me to hold power over me kept spilling out.

We walked our usual route. She’s a nervous dog, so we were taking things slow. We started walking by a house that has two dobermans. They’re usually outside behind a fence. They weren’t this time. I heard their garage door open, the owner of the two dogs saw us and started yelling at their dogs to stay. They weren’t on leash. I grabbed my dog, picked her up and started to run before she could notice the dogs and react. Had she reacted, I fully believe we both would have gotten mauled. Mind you, I’m chronically ill and walking is hard on me. I cannot run to save my life. Those dogs are not friendly, they lunge and snarl every single time we pass by that house, they try to get through the fence to get to us. I have no choice but to walk by there to get home. The dogs then walk out into the driveway, at this point I’m having a panic attack. I can’t breathe. My dog is tiny, and I was petrified we’d both be attacked. The owner kept yelling at them to stay back, one of the dogs was focused on my dog and I. I didn’t make eye contact. This was one of the scariest experiences I’ve had. I’m sick of having to change routes, because people let their dogs out, off leash with no recall. We’ve been charged at by multiple dogs, making my dog’s anxiety and reactivity worse. Walking my dog gives me so much anxiety, even going on a walk by myself makes me panic. The amount of irresponsible dog owners in my neighborhood is insane. A part of me wants to tell these people to stop allowing their clearly aggressive dogs out in their front yard. Should I? I don’t want to start conflict, but this could have ended so badly. My dog is never off leash when outdoors. Edit: I also know that running was a bad idea, but I was so scared. I couldn’t think rationally. All I could think about is getting away from that house before my dog sees the off leash dogs. I was close to home, and all I wanted was to get home as fast as I possibly could.

March

DAY/LINK	LINEUP
Wed 22nd @ New World	The Foreign Resort, Sleeping Pills, and More
Fri 24th @ Orpheum	BroJob, Tactosa, In Gloom, Sever the Memories, Endbringer
Fri 24th @ Crowbar	Weeping Wound, Downswing, Enox, Scatter Shot, Gas FL
Fri 24th @ Jannus	The Winery Dogs
Sun 26th @ Brass Mug	Temptress
Tue 28th @ Orpheum	Fit For An Autopsy, The Acacia Strain, Full of Hell, Primitive Man
Tue 28th @ Jannus	Polyphia
Wed 29th @ Orpheum	Eluveitie, Omnium Gatherum, Seven Spires
Wed 29th @ Crowbar	Unwritten Law, Authority Zero, Mercy Music
Fri 31st @ Orpheum	Suicide Commando, 00tz 00tz
Fri 31st @ Born Free	Spy, Pez, Colonial Wound, Horsewhip, Shining Wizard
Fri 31st @ Brass Mug	The DOOD, Cypher Machine, Get out of Nashville, Burn Forever, Crimson Shadow, MANNA

April

DAY/LINK	LINEUP
Sat 1st @ Brass Mug	Svinfylking, Warrior's Chalice, Tunnels of Set, Slutwitch, Sacrilous, Othalan
Sat 1st @ Orpheum	Magnolia Park, Arrows In Action, Poptropicaslutz!, First and Forever
Sun 2nd @ Jannus	Nothing More, Crown the Empire, Thousand Below
Sun 2nd @ Orpheum	Free Throw, Can’t Swim, Heart to Gold, Early Humans
Wed 5th @ Jannus	Lorna Shore, Shadow of Intent, Bodysnatcher, Boundaries
Fri 7th @ Crowbar	Lightning Bolt, Special Guests TBA
Fri 7th @ Conduit*	Deicide, Three Knuckles Deep, Killing Addiction, Vacuous Depths
Sat 8th @ Orpheum	Carcass, Municipal Waste, Sacred Reich, Creeping Death
Sun 9th @ Orpheum	Escuela Grind, Bonginator, more TBA
Sun 9th @ Brass Mug	Eyehategod, Goatwhore, More TBA
Mon 10th @ Orpheum	Cold, Divide the Fall, Awake for Days, Sygnal to Noise
Tue 11th @ Crowbar	Gorod, Cognitive, Summoning The Lich, Flub
Wed 12th @ Crowbar	Speed, Kharma, Day by Day, Three Knee Deep
Wed 12th @ Jannus	Wage War, nothing,nowhere., Spite
Thu 13th @ Pegasus	Dead Reckoning, Ultimatum, Annabel Lee, Announce the Apocalypse, Trash Panda
Sat 15th @ Brass Mug	Ulcer, Promethean Horde, Druid Lord, Parasite Disciple, Sacrilous, Cum Soaked Corpses
Sat 15th @ Orpheum	Whitechapel, Archspire, Signs Of The Swarm, Entheos
Sun 16th @ Born Free	Rhythm of Fear, Living in Fear, Shades of War, Head High, Odium Rot
Sun 16th @ Orpheum	Slaughter To Prevail
Sun 16th @ Jannus	Queensrÿche, Trauma, Marty Friedman
Thu 20th @ Brass Mug	Catcher and the Rye, Sworn to Decay, Higher Ground, What We Seek, Gallows Down
Fri 21st @ Brass Mug	Green Jelly, Collapsor, Abortion Twins, Kindly Shut Up!, One Trip Little
Fri 21st @ Orpheum	Morbid Angel, Revocation, Vitriol, Crypta
Fri 21st @ Noise Box	Regions, Pure Bliss, Murkov, Days Spent, Gas FL
Wed 26th @ Crowbar	Mac Sabbath, Roxx Revolt & The Velvets
Thu 27th @ Crowbar	Dropout Kings, Fatal Frames, and more
Sat 29th @ Brass Mug	Diabolic, Piss on Christ, Voidrium, God Rot
Sun 30th @ The Ritz	The Black Dahlia Murder, Terror, Frozen Soul, Fuming Mouth, Phobophilic

May

DAY/LINK	LINEUP
Tue 2nd @ Crowbar	Vampires Everywhere!, Saving Vice, more TBA
Thu 4th @ Brass Mug	Agent Orange, Suzi Moon, Blood Donor, Mobius Loop, Bad Future, The Hand of Reason
Fri 5th @ Born Free	Leeway, Damn Your Eyes, Fire Is Murder, Highest Crown, Yield to None
Sun 7th @ Jannus	Alestorm, Gloryhammer, Lutharo
Wed 10th @ Conduit*	Ingested, Devourment, Extermination Dismemberment, Organectomy, Implosive Disgorgence
Wed 10th @ Level 13*	Chelsea Grin, Carnifex, Left to Suffer, Ov Sulfur
Fri 12th @ Brass Mug	GrindFest IV 1st night - Lineup in link - Headliners: Kill Division
Sat 13th @ Brass Mug	GrindFest IV 2nd night - Lineup in link - Headliners: Coathanger Abortion
Sat 13th @ Crowbar	Woe Is Me, Prison, The Funeral Portrait, Spider Inside Her, Chasing Airplanes
Sun 14th @ Crowbar	Meg Myers, Weathers, Band of Silver
Tue 16th @ Jannus	Helloween, Hammerfall
Wed 17th @ Floridian	Voivod, Imperial Triumphant, more TBA
Fri 19th @ Orpheum	Dark Funeral, Cattle Decapitaton, 200 Stab Wounds, Blackbraid
Fri 19th @ Jannus	Avatar, Veil of Maya, Orbit Culture
Wed 24th @ Brass Mug	Possessed, The Black Moriah, Perdition Temple, More TBA

June

DAY/LINK	LINEUP
Fri 2nd @ Orpheum	Currents, Like Moths to Flames, Foreign Hands
Sat 3rd @ Orpheum	Attack Attack!, Traitors, Belmont, Colorblind, Tactosa
Sat 3rd @ Pegasus	Not Promised Tomorrow, Get out of Nashville, Forged with Blood
Sun 4th @ Jannus	Ugly Kid Joe, Fozzy
Sat 10th @ Brass Mug	Metal and Tats w/ Rob Wolf, Halo Scars, Mind Virus, Cypher Machine and RE-BIRTH
Sat 10th @ Orpheum	Spotlights, Horsewhip, Gillian Carter
Wed 14th @ Crowbar	MyChildren MyBride, Extortionist, No Cure, Your Spirit Dies, Richard Cory, GasFL
Sat 24th @ MidFlorida	The Original Misfits, Megadeth, Fear

July

DAY/LINK	LINEUP
Sat 1st @ Brass Mug	D.R.I., Metalriser
Fri 21st @ MidFlorida	Mudvayne, Coal Chamber, GWAR, Nonpoint, Butcher Babies

August

DAY/LINK	LINEUP
Sat 5th @ MidFlorida	Disturbed
Sat 26th @ MidFlorida	Rob Zombie, Alice Cooper, Ministry, Filter

September

DAY/LINK	LINEUP
Sat 30th @ Vinoy	NOFX Final Tour - Guests TBA

October

DAY/LINK	LINEUP
Tue 10th @ Orpheum	Ne Obliviscaris, Beyond Creation, Persefone

^{* This is an Orlando area venue, however due to the popularity of this show I have included it here.}

Hello, I'm after advice on anything that can be done to shut up a noisy neighbour.
We live in a quiet suburban street in Hobart, and a couple months ago neighbours of ours started partying at home regularly. Ranging from once a week to several times a week, midweek, weekend, no real pattern to it. They play very loud music, they sing along at the top of their lungs, and have extremely loud conversations (when they're trying to talk over the very loud music). Some nights they're done by 10 or so, others like last night, they were still going at 4am.
We've talked to them several times, initially they were apologetic, and promised to keep it down, and close the windows to keep some of the noise in. But they soon returned to loud partying. Now they don't care what we say, and we can hear them yelling at each other about how we're terrible people (in more colourful language).
Last night my wife called the police at 1am, they came and things were quiet for 20 minutes, then they turned everything back on. Once of them walked outside and yelled told the general street to "get fucked you fuckin caaarnts" etc etc.
Semi unrelated, but they've also got a dog who's super aggressive and anti social, probably from being locked inside all day, and exposed to super loud music all night.
These people aren't young, they look in their 40s. Polite conversation hasn't worked. Calling the police hasn't worked. Are there any ways to escalate this further, to get a longer lasting solution?
Not sure if they're renting or owning (fingers crossed they rent), not sure if that affects our options.

I took a gig that’s two drop in’s a day for two large dogs while the guy is gone three days. I know. I know. I tried to ask about doing more and he insisted it was fine because he leaves them that long all the time for work. That doesn’t make me feel better but okay. I need the money.
I started this morning. Today and tomorrow I have a mid day walk up the street from his house, so I let my client know I’d be dropping by mid day for 10 minutes to let the dogs pee and run around the yard, free of charge. (I don’t know why I do these things I just do.) He said great, that’s fine!
I show up after my mid day walk and HE’S STILL HOME. No sign of him at the morning walk he must’ve been home sleeping. When I arrive the dogs are in the yard and I’m like what the fuck how’d they get out? Then I see my client picking up dog shit. He said he had to do it before he left because he told his girlfriend he would. 😑 Why didn’t he tell me not to come by this afternoon?

I will be rewatching the reboot and reviewing it after certain things have made me realize that I do not like most other fans’ opinions of things. They seem overly critical, especially fans of the original Charmed.
For reference, I have seen and enjoyed all seasons/episodes of the original, but only the first two seasons of the reboot, and I don’t remember most of the reboot that I’ve seen. I will not be comparing the two. I personally feel that everyone compares the original and the reboot, and that doesn’t give the reboot a fair chance in my opinion. Same name and premise aside, the reboot is not the original, and it has its own storyline, characters, and rules, and thus should be judged on its own merits.
Charmed Reboot Season 1, Episode 1
So the first line of the reboot: “This is not a witch hunt.” It’s a good opening line, got me interested.
I liked the scene with Mel, Maggie, and their mother. It was actually nice that we got to see the mom of the Charmed Ones so early on. And their dynamic screams close so far.
Okay. Next scene was pretty bad. The “get naked” text was pretty out of left field. And I’m already not a fan of Brian. Stalker much? Also, why does he come off as a high schooler?
I actually loved the mom’s death scene. It was sufficiently creepy and gave a mystery to run off of. That said, Mel’s already beginning to annoy me. I thought this show was supposed to be feminist, not misandric. Replacing one prejudice for another is not what I’m here for. Side note, for some reason, I love Lucy already. She’s adorable.
I like Macy already, and Maggie for that matter. Don’t ask why. Not a fan of Galvin, his character’s coming off pretty dry, and he’s giving me “Lean on me because I’m the man” vibes, and ew. Also, not getting any chemistry. Dr. Thaine, meanwhile, is seriously creepy, and not in a good way.
More sexism from Mel. Gross. And Harry is also creepy. Fun (sarcasm). Starting to get the sense that this show is trying way too hard to make all the men come off as creeps.
Proven more with the next scene and Cam. This is getting ridiculous.
Yeah, Macy is already my fave of these sisters. Hating Mel. Maggie is okay though, so far. I take back what I said about the seeming closeness. That said, while I have no clue why Macy didn’t go to their house during the day like a normal person when it would be less suspicious, I did like the whole lightning flash/power outage. It brought back the creepy feels, in a good way, from the scene where the mom died.
And we get to the powers! Macy has telekinesis. An iconic power, and it suits her. Mel has freezing time. That scene with her was actually cool, kind of hoping it’s actual chronokinesis cause that would be bomb. And as a side note, while I still don’t like Mel as a character, digging Niko so far, and those two at least have chemistry, unlike Macy/Galvin and Maggie/Brian. And Maggie has telepathy! That’s actually my favorite power. While I would prefer it didn’t require touch, I still love that she has it. All of the powers seem like they’ll be useful and I love that. Other side notes: 1) I’d have put the scene of Mel’s power activation before Maggie’s, but I’m also OCD so it bugs me the power reveals weren’t in birth order. Lol 2) Still loving Lucy. lol 3) Mel getting kidnapped looked so frickin’ stupid, omg.
So I liked the attic scene as a whole. Harry redeemed himself in my eyes, just on account of how adorable he was in it. Lol And more mystery!
Side note: I know that I said that I wouldn’t compare the two shows, so I’m only bringing this up cause it somewhat has to do with this specific Charmedverse, and I’ve also noticed that others who have tried this show tend to bring it up negatively. The Melinda Warren reference. I don’t think that was meant to tie this show and the original into the same universe, I think it was just a throwback, same as them using the word “whitelighter”. Back to the reboot.
Brian’s still being a stalker. But Mel and Niko are actually really cute together.
Demon dog was as stupid as the Mel kidnap scene.
I will say I’m loving the new whitelighter powers, and the revamp of the old ones, feels more modern. I liked Macy solving the demon crisis with science. You don’t normally see that in magic-centric shows. Good acting from Sarah Jeffery with the mini breakdown she had regarding their mother. And the Maggie kidnap scene definitely came off better than Mel’s, more real and suspenseful, even if it was just a rush prank.
Still loving Lucy.
The possessed Brian scene was really stupid, ridiculous, and annoying. They need to stop with the feminist shit, at least the way they’re doing it. It’s not coming off as feminist, it’s coming off as forced and like they’re turning it into a joke, and it’s offensive. Also, the way the demon was vanquished…. I feel like I’m watching the Disney channel. Side note: Can Brian just… disappear? He seriously comes off like a high school minor, so the romance stuff with him just makes me uncomfortable. He and Maggie don’t even have chemistry… and I’m kind of glad about that.
I liked the following sisterhood scenes. They’re getting back to close and I’m not hating Mel so much anymore, but I need to see more of her for more of a new (solid) opinion.
More faux feminism (back to disliking Mel, that was fast) and Thaine/Thaydeus’ (sp?) horrible characterization aside, the demon fight was actually good. And despite not wanting to do this, it has to be said. I am liking the actual spells. One of the only things I hated about the original show was the rhyming couplets as it didn’t fit the otherwise adult themes of that show.
And the ending cliffhanger was actually bomb and made me want to keep watching!
All in all and in conclusion, it wasn’t as bad as people make it out to be. Could it be better? Definitely. But it had as much good as bad so far, so I’m going to keep watching. If I could sit through all four seasons of Legacies, I think I can get through this. Lol
Tell me what you all thought of this episode in the comments below, and I’ll see everyone for my Season 1, Episode 2 review.

Part 1
I made it out that night, but the thirst for and the haunting of my brain by the game didn’t go away. It never went away. I felt more and more like I was trapped in that awful endless game throughout my life.
Life did not go well. Especially after I figured out the only way to soothe the endless mind terror of the game was to drown it in as much alcohol and drugs as I could until I blacked out, and passed out.
This behavior wiped out all my teenage years. The only thing that stopped it was getting myself thrown in prison in my 20s and getting years to dry out.
Then I got spit put in my 30s. Nowhere to go. Totally unprepared for life.
I went back to my hometown. That was about the only option I had.
I walked around the town endlessly, and aimlessly. Being on the move tended to push away the monsters in my head, and, yes, they were still stalking me all these years later - I had never broken the chain of mental terror of the game.
I was shocked to see the video game stores still open at the edge of town.
There was no choice but to go in. I was further shocked to find the layout almost exactly the same, sans Morton.
Instead, a tall man about my age was behind the counter, long greasy hair, playing a game on a PC. He didn’t acknowledge me in the slightest.
I walked the racks of games, always one eye on the man behind the counter. I knew him. It was definitely Nat, just aged like me - some white hair in a sad attempt at a beard, some wrinkles on his forehead.
Nat was giving off the energy and posture of someone who was doing everything he could to avoid being talked to. I wasn’t going to let it slide this time.
I called him by his name. He seemed shocked. He still barely acknowledged me. The only information he would give me was that Morton died years earlier and handed the shop down to him.
It felt like he was going to slip away from helping me again until I mentioned a name which caught his ear:
Calyn
Nat finally stopped playing the game and made eye contact. What did I know about Calyn?
Not much. She was just my out of my league, childhood crush from growing up, and I knew he was with her.
Nat went back to ignoring me. Until I brought up the game, From Japan.
This caught his attention again. After correcting that the game wasn’t from Japan, he asked me a question:
“What was your experience with the game?”
“I ruined my life,” I answered.
Nat finally let down his wall of frigid cold cool. He looked at me with moisture in his eyes.
“Mine too,” Nat muttered.
It felt terrible to see Nat so broken. He was like this magical cool, ahead of his time, gamer bad ass when we were growing up and now he looked like an underfed and beaten dog.
I could sense a particular sadness ever since I mentioned Calyn.
“Where is Calyn?” I asked.
“At home,” Nat dropped a big revelation like it was nothing.
“Morton said you could beat the game though. Didn’t that solve the problem?” I asked.
Nat didn’t answer, but I felt no hope radiate out of him.
“So how are you getting through all this then?” I asked.
“It’s just a struggle every day,” Nat explained.
“Do you want it to be that way forever?” I asked.
Nat looked up at me, finally with some life in his eyes.
-
Nat had buried his copy of the game underneath an abandoned cabin out in the woods behind his parents’ house. He took me out there and told the true story of the game as we ventured to it.
Yes, Nat had beaten the game. One time, and it almost killed him. He explained the game seemed to connect more and more with you the longer you played it and you could feel it poisoning your blood and mind as you played.
Beating it almost killed him.
He didn’t beat it for himself though. He beat it for Calyn. She had found the game at his house and played it, driving herself mad, to the point it almost killed her. He had her hold the controller with him and helped her, while not looking at the screen as much as he could so she would be the one processing beating the game.
But he beat the game and saved her the best he could. She was tired and damaged afterwards, but she said the game didn’t permeate her mind and life the way it did Nat’s after that.
It helped them stay together. They went from first loves to life partners and had stayed strong together over the years.
Nat kept trying to beat the game on his own and he never could, and each time he tried, he lost a little more of himself, and let a little more of the game into his psyche.
He eventually gave up. He found that he could manage it with copious amounts of marijuana and keeping his life simple. He also found happiness in Calyn being able to live her life, though she had always seemed tired from experiencing the game all those years before, like it was a parasite that would never truly let her go.
We found the game. The sight of that blank disc took my breath away.
We thought that we would have a better chance if we tried it together. We fired up the game and our nerves filled the room in his little apartment.
Going back into the game for the first time in decades was harrowing. I couldn’t do anything else. Couldn’t move outside of controlling the game. I started to sweat.
The game was even harder than I remembered. It was so dark you could barely see. The monsters seemed to be hiding around every corner and they’d launch at you the second they saw you and take you out.
Nat and I took turns and neither of us could survive for more than a few minutes. We just kept dying and dying and it seemed to take the energy, life, and wind out of us each time.
The two of us sat down after a few deaths.
The two of us both knew we were starting to swiftly wither away. We were older and more weathered - the game was taking more of a toll on our bodies and minds.
I was starting to get light headed after losing my life in the game for what must have been 50 times. It was getting late into the night and I could hardly stay awake, yet I kept playing on.
I have no idea when I fell asleep or passed out. All I knew was that I woke up at some point in the middle of the night and could see Nat still playing, the remote in his hand, but him on the ground, on one knee, his face glued to the T.V.
Nat looked terrible - his face was bright red, his body was leaned forward like he had a terrible pain in his stomach and he was gasping for air. He looked like he was being strangled.
I looked closer at the screen and saw one of the faceless monsters on the screen. I could see its arms reaching out in the P.O.V. The monster was choking out Nat.
I rushed to Nat and reached for the controller. I felt something push me backward, full on knocking me over.
I felt a cold, strong grasp around my neck as I laid on the ground. I tried to fight back and push the energy off me, but couldn’t. It was far too strong.
The oxygen started to no longer get to my brain. My vision started to get foggy. I felt like my entire body got heavy, like I could no longer move it.
Then, darkness.
-
I woke up on the floor - breathless, pained, and confused. I saw a familiar face towering above me, but horribly aged.
I didn’t recognize him at first and then it came into focus. It was Morton. He was old and looked like shit but there was no denying it was him. There was no way I could mistake that disapproving scowl.
The urge to say something to Morton came over me. He held a finger to his lips. Silence. I obeyed.
Morton’s eyes went back to the screen and I looked him over again - he had the Playstation remote in his hand, he had concentration on his face, his legs wobbled, weak, as if he was struggling to keep his balance. He certainly looked like he was in a fight.
And he was struggling and fighting. I looked at the screen and Morton was taking on an entire room full of the monsters.
I had never made it as far in the game as Morton appeared to have made it. He was outside. I had never been there. He also appeared to be doing a good job at it.
I felt myself feel like I was wrapped in a bear hug. I looked up at the screen and saw the monsters overtaking Morton.
I started to feel my body crunch. It felt like I was getting rolled up into a thousand-pound rug.
I could feel my body telling me I didn’t have much time left. I looked next to me and saw Nat on the floor as well, not looking good at all.
The black was returning to my senses. I couldn’t hold out under this squeezing for much longer.
I started to scream. Nat screamed. Morton grumbled and flexed, playing the game as hard as he could.
I felt something else coming over me, over the pain and the torture and the wasted life. I felt someone fighting for me. I felt Morton fighting for me.
The T.V. screen started to shake. I saw on the screen it looked like Morton was going to work on one, final monster - a large one, and it was backpedaling.
I felt the squeezing feeling on me start to let go. I could breathe again. I felt like I could get up.
I watched the monster explode on the screen above me. I then watched the glass of the T.V. explode - showering the three of us with sparks and dark glass.
There was a moment of silence with an absence of movement. Then the world started to come back to me. I was alive, and in felt significantly better.
Then Morton collapsed onto the floor between Nat and I.
-
Morton had terminal cancer. He hadn’t actually died yet. He confided in Nat when he got sick and disappeared and told Nat to tell everyone that he simply died, but the truth was he just gave up the store, moved away, and tried to do treatment in peace.
Nat reached out to him when we were failing at the game. Morton was the next best video gamer that he knew and wanted to see if he could help.
Nat and I had failed and passed out by the time Morton arrived.
Morton knew it would kill him much sooner if he tried and beat the game, but he gave it a go anyway.
And he saved both our lives. We owed him everything.
Nat and I went to Morton’s hospital room.
He wouldn’t talk to us, or let us look at him. He would only communicate by a whiteboard which he would write answers to our verbal questions on and hand it around a curtain next to his bed.
Morton explained he could go at any minute and that he needed some help from us. He also very much in his fashion revealed something I never thought about.
Morton showed us the whiteboard - it read: This wasn’t the first time I did this for you, either :)
It clicked with me as soon as I saw his writing on the white board. I could see that dark figure standing over me that night at Corey’s house when someone saved me from the monsters in the game. Morton must have been keeping an eye on me or Corey’s house and came to save me, but kept himself hidden.
Morton quickly changed the conversation on his white board and handed us a list - an Excel sheet printed out, with a note - explaining these were the copies of the dreaded game which were still out there.
He finished by saying he had enough energy for one last question.
Would we go out and try to track down the copies of the game and destroy them?

AN: A little one shot I did that I thought I'd share with y'all, did it yesterday after a brief moment of inspiration. If you're not familiar with the youtube series 'Helluva Boss' watch it.
“Alright you worthless pack of crotch goblin crack babies, pump and dump leftovers, and…Floridians. Get your asses out of your cardboard boxes and over to the windows and go to the showroom to see whatever factory, brothel, rich prick or bored housefrau are looking for cheap labor or decorations. And put on a good show or Satan help you there’ll be no sawdust in your dinner tonight!” The obese demon’s mouth dropped open as low as his chest as he leaned into the door to shout, acidic spittle flew past his red lips and added fresh holes to the cardboard box that served as Loona’s ‘space’.
She still had it out of habit, but the early days when the boxes lined the walls and it was the only way anyone could sleep without crowding everyone else… those were over.
Now she was the last one left, but the burly demon who finished his words with a loud ‘braaap’ that smelled like beer to her sharp nose, didn’t even know that much. The last batch of orphans were gone already.
Whether they went to good homes or not was hardly a question. ‘It’s hell. There’s no good homes here unless you’re rich.’ But between the orphanage she’d spent her life in and the lives they were going to, the hellhound had no idea whether they were better off or not. Some yes, some no.
She had a private game she played with herself, guessing the lives the ones who were chosen were leaving for. Last night’s batch went with an owl demon family in fancy clothes, the oldest of them was stooped with age, but whether that meant he was actually old or if he’d come down to hell looking that way, or even been born that way… who knew? But the little owl family had a very small boy who was pointing at the line.
While the younger ones danced, did tricks, and answered questions and tried to impress the parents and the boy who pointed at them one by one, she did not.
“And you? What is your name?” The demon-wife asked, and Loona shrugged.
“Loona.” She replied.
“Daaaaad, the mongrel’s not doing anything!” The small one complained and tapped the glass like he was trying to rile up an animal exhibit.
“Ah yes, ah, what do you do?” The husband asked, he leaned forward a little, his eyes wide and yellow, she might have thought he wasn’t bad looking as older guys went, were it not for the fact that he was a little stooped.
It was fairly obvious that the younger woman had married up in status.
Loona bared her teeth and jumped toward the glass, her palms slapped against it, and the small well dressed boy fell backward. “I eat little boy demons in their sleep and fuck their daddies to give them a kid that’s actually theirs!”
The young one began to wail, his keening noise was bad enough that she almost…almost felt bad.
“You bitch!” The younger woman shrieked and pounded on the glass, but it was built to withstand exactly this.
So it held.
Loona straightened up, looked the stunned, disbelieving older demon in the eyes, had he not been caught so off guard, he might have said something, but his shock was her chance. Loona took a few sniffs, “Yeah, he’s not your kid dude, she’s cheating on you. I can tell. Oh and,” she moved in front of the trophy wife and took another sniff from the other side of the glass, inhaling through the little holes through which their words passed, “she was with someone last night. Know where she was, or were you watching? If that’s your thing dude, whatever.” She tapped her nose and winked at the old demon, and fire erupted around the woman that turned the ceiling black.
“We’ll take all of them but that one!” The wife screeched. “Let her rot here by herself!”
Loona shrugged and walked away from the wailing at the glass and took her place in line with the last half dozen of small demon children. They ranged from six to eleven, and as such they still had hopes. It made her dismissal and behavior all the more outlandish and impossible in their eyes. Whether they were hellhounds or imps or something else among the lower class demons, they, at least, were still too young to have given up yet.
When reality hit home for the small ones, they erupted in cheers. The older male began sputtering, he was moving away from the glass, looking from wife to child… she grabbed and yanked the boy up into her arms and overrode him, “We wanted a playmate for Loris and now we’ve got a bunch of them.”
“But honeybunch, that’s more than we intended-” He protested as she guided him toward the door and away from the wall.
“So we’ll make one a playmate for Loris and the others can just clean up their shit. Whatever, let’s go! I need to meet my tennis coach later!” She snapped at the older demon, and out of the corner of her eye, she caught a glimmer of understanding in his eyes.
She might never know for sure, but one thing she was certain of, ‘When it hits home, he won’t be having a conversation with her.’
So being left alone was almost worth it.
That had been the other day, all they had to do to close the building down now was for her to be gone, then it could be sold, and the fat bastard could retire wherever all the other rich fat fucks went when the other institutions had shut down after a buyout.
Seeing her alone now, the fat bastard seemed to slowly recall the incident from the other day.
“And if one of these don’t take you, you’re cleaning up that ceiling unless you want your bowl taken away too!” He bellowed at her, and she nodded.
Life there was one of trying to minimize the unfortunate things. There was no real avoiding them, but they could be minimized with a little cooperation. Don’t say anything when they give you food. Don’t ask for more. Don’t encourage any of the kids to run, and don’t hold back any money if you’re put to work at something.
Those would minimize the slaps and deny them the excuses for the more humiliating punishments, like making hellhounds eat like actual dogs.
That was worse than the occasional slap.
So she sighed and trudged to the far end of the room, opened the door, slammed it behind her, and went to stand in front of the glass. “Name is Loona and I’m here because I bit off my mother’s tit when I was a baby.” It was a lie, probably, though the truth is she didn’t know. Even the orphanage itself didn’t know what, if anything, happened to her parents.
For all she knew, they’d been killed off in a power struggle after a purge.
And since there was no way to know? She didn’t care, and just made up stories for shock value or intimidation. “I’m seventeen. I won’t call you dad. I won’t sleep with you. I’m lazy, and I’ll take off as soon as I’m an adult. Sound good? No? Great. Get the fuck out.” She didn’t even look at the glass or see who was there.
It didn’t matter anyway.
She slumped, her tail and ears drooped, and when the next one came in. “Loona. Seventeen. And I’m here because I wouldn’t stop shitting on everything. I don’t plan to either. Sound good? No. Fuck off.”
“Loona. Seventeen. Cut off my dad’s balls when he tried to pimp me out. Sound good? No? Fuck off.”
“Loona. Seventeen. Kept stealing from my dad’s business to buy drugs. Got any nice easily pawnable stuff at home?” She asked. That one left before she could even tell them to fuck off.
That was how it went, unusually enough, there were more of them than she expected. ‘Fatass must have put out fliers or something.’ She thought. It was hard to picture him doing any work but… he had to have done ‘something’ around the building.
“That’s it for now, get your ass over there and scrub the fuckin ceiling, mongrel!” He shouted from whatever room he’d sequestered himself in.
It wasn’t lost on her that he knew she hadn’t been picked. And probably he figured she’d sabotaged it too.
“No good lousy, lazy, sack of shit…” She mumbled and groused as she stomped to the supply closet, filled the bucket with boiling water, the noise of it echoed in the small confined space like thunder. The steady rise of water was like a clock ticking away the seconds before she could leave this place and die a proper death in some pointless street brawl.
She dumped the foul chemicals into the water, it burned her nose to smell it, but there was no avoiding that much. If she wanted food, she’d have to obey, and her belly was already starting to rumble. Even the sawdust used to thicken out the gruel would have tasted pretty good right about then.
She wheeled the cheap metal bucket out along with the mop and watched the wheels wiggle around on the floor until she brought it to a stop on the other side of the glass.
Loona soaked the mop, strained it to leave it damp, and then held it overhead, clenching her jaw as the burning liquid dripped down into her fur, the foul smell made her gag as it filled the confined space of the narrow hall. The soot on the roof from the cuck’s wife would not come out easy.
But if she worked at it… well, it wasn’t her first time. She went about it with practiced ease.
Nasty as it was, the mindless task at least let her turn off her brain, which she did, and that was also why the high pitched voice caught her by surprise… along with the fact that the chemicals had utterly ruined her nose for the time being.
“Hello there, fuckface, listen I found a flier here about a going out of business bargain on orphans, and I came to get a look so who do I have to fuck around here to get a look at some kids?!” Loona whirled around to glare at the one to speak to her, and found herself face to face with a fairly tall, slender imp with curled horns in a black and white pattern, clad in a black coat and with sharp yellow eyes.
He raised one long finger, “That came out wrong.” He said, and then without missing a beat, he grabbed the lining of his coat with his left hand and thrust out his right toward Loona. “Hi, I’m Blitz the O is silent, nice to meet you, now where are the little rapscallions?”
Loona ignored the hand and put her mop back down in the bucket. It took her a moment to realize, ‘Oh, he thinks I work here!’ It was too good a chance to miss.
She’d never been on the ‘other’ side of the glass in a situation like this… so she gingerly extended a hand while she built up her story. “Hi, yeah if you’re interested, there’s one left. But she’s an evil bitch.”
“Perfect.” He said.
“And she’s old. Like I guess you could probably fuck her, but also she’d probably kill you. She’s crazy like that, total murder hobo, got here by killing both her parents.”
“Meh, no diapers no problem, and I don’t fuck kids and I don’t mind the killing.” He gave a bright, almost clownish smile and thrust his hand into his coat to pull out a business card.
Loona took it in between her fingers and read it. “IMP?” She asked.
“Yes! My own business. We go up to the living world and kill anyone who needs killing. So a killer kid, well, that just means they’ve had practice.” His big grin was almost off putting, but it was also oddly ‘endearing’ like he was used to putting on a performance for people and knew how to get their attention.
“Oh, so you want an employee. Well the last one is lazy, like actual garbage. She’s been here for seventeen years and won’t even do more than fuck with people who come in.” She handed the card back and leaned on the mop. “She’s just the absolute worst.”
“Oh that’s no problem, fucking with people is half my job. And besides, I don’t want an employee, I want…” He stopped, his mouth clamped shut.
“Never mind.” He said. “Can I see the kid or not?”
“No. Sorry, you have to say what you want them for, it goes on the form. We really don’t care. Nobody who works here gives a shit, but if we don’t submit a reason, we’ll get in trouble. You could just want someone to smuggle drugs up their ass, and as long as the form is filled out, nobody cares what’s on it.” She snorted, that wasn’t even a lie.
“Fine. It’s that. I need an anal coke mule.” Blitzo said, but it was the most obvious lie Loona had ever heard, he was also far more subdued than when he first came in.
She snorted, “No, it’s not, I just made that up. Now go on, what’s the real reason you want to adopt a seventeen year old lazy good-for-nothing killer that nobody has even given a second glance at one single time in seventeen years of her worthless, disappointing, trashy existence, Mr. Blitz the O is Silent?” She put his name in air quotes and stared at the slender imp, and finally he exhaled.
“Fine. You really want to know?” He asked and went to look into the empty room where Loona should have been on display. “I’ve got these employees, Moxie and Millie, they’re my hitters. They’ve got a great marriage. A great life. I see them every single day, and the thing is, I know that if they left my business, they’d go off and…be just fine. They don’t need me.”
“Nobody needs me. I’m probably one of the only imps in hell to have his own business. I know I’m the only imp with access to the living world. I can do what nobody else can do. But sooner or later I’ll probably die, either a client, or a job, or a purge. And even though I can do what nobody else can do, let’s be real. These fuckin idiots out there who hire us are a few horns short of a demon. Pretty much anybody they want to kill for revenge is probably going to come down here anyway, and if they weren’t, all we did was send their target to those prude fucks up in heaven for a few extra eternal years of bliss. Even so, the money is pretty fuck’n good. And I like doing stuff I’m good at.” He chuckled, “But then what? Who do I give it to? So I thought… maybe…” His bright yellow eyes grew large as he pressed them against the window.
“Maybe if I had a kid, I could teach them stuff, get them really good at killing, running a business, and pass it on to them.” Blitzo answered and then his voice grew hard, “Besides, someone like what you say… yeah, I get that. Being an imp is not a whole lot better than being an orphan.”
“What do you know about it?” She snapped at him, her tail bristled.
“I used to be a circus performer, long time ago. Making people laugh who didn’t give a fuck if I lived or died. So yeah, I know about putting on shows for assholes.” Blitzo said and crossed his arms as if daring her to argue the point.
Her stomach rumbled, interrupting her thoughts.
“What am I keeping you from lunch or something?” Blitzo asked.
“Nah. I’ll eat tonight.” Loona answered and then asked, “So, if you did get this kid, would you… pay her?” She asked.
“Well yeah, if she’s working there she’s gonna get a salary even if she’s my kid. I have standards… not high ones but still!” He exclaimed.
“It’s not an imp.” She said, “Nobody will buy that you actually got laid.”
Blitzo snorted, “Hey, I have- no that’s not the point!” He stopped himself and then retorted, “Listen if the kid doesn’t want me, that’s up to them, fine, but what’s with all the stalling.”
“So, like, yeah, you know she’s not going to call you dad or anything, right?” Loona prompted, “She’s almost grown up.”
“Well… maybe not. But maybe? When she sees I’m trying to be the best dad ever!” Blitzo answered and slapped his chest with one hand, “I’ll have you know I can be very nurturing and very patient. If she wants to call me by my first name, well, that’s alright.”
“And if maybe, she say, wouldn’t go with you unless you helped her punish the place that spent the last seventeen years making her hate the fact that she existed…?” Loona looked the imp up and down, he was definitely taller than the average imp, at least a third as much so. Not as tall as she was, but he loomed over the other imps she’d seen.
“Well, that just sounds like a fun first daddy-daughter activity. Why, it’s more wholesome than the rainbow shit of an angel.” Blitzo said with pride, and Loona couldn’t resist a short laugh.
“Really, Blitz the O is silent?” Loona asked and cocked her head.
“Really, really.” Blitzo answered, preening with pride, “A good dad looks after his kid, and he punishes the ones that hurt them.”
“Alright then, I’ll… go get her.” Loona’s heart pounded her chest when she recognized her own words.
She dropped the mop and disappeared around the corner. She passed through the common area, and saw her cardboard box lying there in the middle, she kicked it aside and watched it crumple against the wall.
Then after taking one long breath, she opened the door and stepped into the showroom.
Blitzo blinked when he saw her come in.
“My name is Loona. I’m seventeen years old. I don’t know how I got here. Where my parents are, if they’re alive, dead, or what. I don’t know whether they wanted me, or whether I was garbage they threw away the moment I was born. I’ve been through a lot of these showings. Sometimes a half a dozen a day, watched one kid after another picked. And, honestly, if you walk out that door too, I’m pretty sure that I won’t leave here until I’m eighteen. You might really be my last shot at… I don’t even know what anymore. So if you do leave, I guess I’ll never know. And I’m ready for that. But… if all that stuff you said wasn’t bullshit, I can at least promise I won’t run away.”
She raised her head, “I’ve got nowhere to run to anyway. I guess we’ve got that much in common, huh?”
“Yeah. I guess we do.” Blitzo answered from the other side of the glass.
A loud ‘braaaap’ echoed from another room. “Hey mongrel, you get that ceiling clean or are you going to be eating scraps off the floor again?!”
Loona’s belly rumbled again, and Blitzo put two and two together very quickly.
“I gotta fill out some paperwork real quick, you wait there, yeah?” He said and stepped away from the glass.
Loona nodded.
She didn’t move a step while she listened to the crashing and screaming from another room. “We. Are trying. To have. A moment here, you asshole!” The crashing was followed by a single scream.
There was nothing, or, not much for a bit. Just the sound of scribbling that even Loona’s keen ears could barely detect.
And then the sound of a closing door as Blitzo returned. He held up a golden paper which read ‘Certificate of Adoption’ on it.
Loona read it over and over. It didn’t seem real, but her face never changed. She left, came around the corner, and winced a little as he squeezed her into a hug that took up both of her arms, the certificate in hand, a phone in the other, and then snapped a picture of the two of them together.
“So… now what, Blitz the O is silent?” She asked when the hug broke.
“Now you first cut the shit, it’s Blitz-O, I just go by Blitz.” He said and put his hands on his hips. “Or,” his bright smile returned and his yellow eyes sparkled like amber in the light, “you can call me daddy… no, no that shit is creepy, just ‘dad’.”
“Blitz it is, then.” She retorted and stepped a little away from him.
“Alright then, so I’ll just drop this in the mail on the way out and we can step out and go shopping.” Blitzo answered and began sealing the certificate up into an envelope he’d taken from the office/scene of the severe beating.
“Shopping, for what?” Loona asked and raised an eyebrow. She let out a groan, “It’s not for some shitty ribbons or matching shirts or anything is it?”
“No, no, no no no, no… maybe later, but no. This is to buy some gas and alcohol to douse this place in so we can burn it to the ground. I’ll betcha fatso in there will go up like a roman fuckin candle when the fire reaches him. But also you can grab lunch, order whatever you want.” He laughed and rubbed his hands together.
Loona almost didn’t believe it. But then… not an hour and a half later, they were back in the building dousing it with cans of foul smelling fuel between taking shots of liquor… and she could still hear him groaning in the office. Her stomach was no longer growling.
“One second, Blitz.” She said when he stood at the door holding a match and ready to strike the flame.
Loona went to the office of her lifelong tormenter, his tendons were cut, his face was a ruin of its former self, his guts were opened and organs tied in knots in various places. Even if she did nothing, odds were he was not going to survive.
But it would take a good long time for him to die too.
“Hey, shitbag.” She said and got his head to waver as he tried to look in her direction.
“I wanted to tell you three things. The ceiling will be clean pretty soon… at least, it’s all going to match by the time the fire dies down, and that’s clean enough. Second, I had a nice lunch while you were stuck here. And third…I guess I might have a pretty good dad.”
She then slammed the door as his arm, which she noticed was shattered in a few places, was slowly raised as if he was expecting her to help him.
Loona then returned to the exit where Blitzo waited with the match still up. “Can I light it?” She asked as she stepped outside.
“Will you call me dad?” He asked and fluttered his eyes at her.
“No.” She replied.
“Alright, here you go anyway.” He said and added, “Make dad proud.” He grinned and watched her strike the match, the little flame hovered like the sun in front of her eyes, and then she gave it a gentle toss. It landed on the floor, the fuel caught, the flames roared, and true to her word, the ceiling matched in seconds, the darkness, smoke, and burning spreading all over the building.
There was a brief few seconds of screaming from the office.
But then there was nothing but the roar of flames.
“So… Now what, Blitz?” Loona asked.
“Now, we go home.” Blitzo answered, “Let me show you where it is.”
And with that, she walked beside him without a backward glance while the building fell to ruin behind her.