Little girl braid hairstyles
Witnessed strange lights
2023.06.08 11:04 bitchinwitchy Witnessed strange lights
 | Back at the end of last year I had a series of weird things happen that I’m trying to process/get some insight on. It started a few months after I began experimenting with magic mushrooms. I had taken a fair amount of mushrooms before these events happened and hadn’t experienced anything out of the ordinary even taking probably close to 7 grams in a period of 2 hours or so - and did not have too heavy of a trip) I decided to start dosing before work which I figured would be chill as (like I said) I had already experimented and did not get visuals or feel particularly out of control. In fact it felt like I was a lot more in tune with my surroundings even driving and stuff. submitted by bitchinwitchy to Experiencers [link] [comments] With that said, I started taking about 1 gram or so every couple days and around this time is when I met Sue - a homeless woman who would come into our coffee shop almost daily while I was barista-ing. I was immediately intrigued by her and we became fast friends. She told me she was 67, half miwok Indian, half polish, and she was always dressed in a colorful outfit, beautiful rings, with her nails painted. She’d tell me about her tarot readings and we’d share a cigarette while I was on break. It was clear when I met her she probably had some type of mental illness going on because she would sometimes talk loudly about arch angel michael, money from god, and things that didn’t make a lot of sense to me, but I tried to remain open minded and curious with her. I even offered her mushrooms but she refused saying she had “enough spiritual stuff going on in her life.” One day, after a particularly interesting conversation with Sue, I disappeared off to run an errand for my boss, when I came back Sue was gone and my boss handed me a tattered book. it was “A Life in Drama” a biography on Shakespeare or something of the like, and the outside of the book was covered in cryptic pen drawings like I’d never seen before. There was an inscription “June Sue I learn from you!” Which immediately brought me back to the first day I met her. She had drawn me and I had told her loved that I loved her name - she told me I should add it to my name and I agreed with her. “your guardian anglebirth” it read. And there was a sparrow hawk, trees, a ship all sort of in abstract pen drawing. On the front, in small ink, less than an inch, there was an almost abstract looking shape and in the center was the word “love” - she never told me what the shape was as she didn’t remember drawing it but later my therapist suggested it as a picnic basket. Anyway, a few days later I went and had it tattooed on my arm because I loved it. I was in the process of quitting my job around this time so I wasn’t seeing Sue as often which prompted me to think about when to go visit her. I was in no hurry to show her, I knew when the time was right I would go. A few afternoons later, after taking about a gram of mushrooms I bought 200$ worth and then went to see her. It was around this time that day I started hearing voices I thought at the time were god and the mushrooms themselves. It’s been a while since this all happened so my memory is a bit blurry, though I did write down most of what happened shortly thereafter. Anyways, there was something about Sue that I trusted. I really wanted to show her my mushrooms so I took her to my trunk. All I remember is sitting in the back of the trunk with her and all of a sudden these crazy lilac purple lights start shining down on me like I’m on a stage? This is in broad daylight on the street. I remember there was like a little noise they made I think, and it felt like i was in the twilight zone. It was so bizarre - I’ve never experienced anything remotely like it. And the only place they really shown down on was my face and neck (where I had lots of acne). As I’m like, what the fuck is going on Sue looks over and says something along the lines of “many gifts are coming to you.” ( like I said, never experienced ANY visions before and having Sue acting like she saw the light too makes me feel like something weird is going on. ) Later on back in her tent all of a sudden I start experiencing the most insane pain but it’s not physical. To this day I don’t know how to describe it but I was deeply uncomfortable to the point where I am SCREAMING in this woman’s tent and she’s telling me to quiet down so the cops don’t come and commit me. After that she gave me water, food, and it kind of felt like she could read my mind which is a phenomena I experienced a lot the next few days. Everything I needed she provided. I was completely depleted and weak. She was yelling at mysterious powers saying “earthangel June (me) does not deserve this!!” She told me I had been divinely poisoned by the mushrooms because I had not blessed them before ingesting them. Later that night she also tells me that her tarot cards told her a young woman would come to visit her and that I was she. I slowly came down a bit. Sue offered for me to spend the night, but I knew I wanted to go back home, though it was past midnight when I got home. I don’t remember much of the mundane time between - The next morning I woke and headed back to her where I spent another full day and find out both me and my dads debit cards aren’t working, and Sue is unsurprised (I’m starting to believe in this weird matrix of energy she’s talking about and feel like I’m targeted when I’m around her, or that she has some sort of bad luck) She dropped many lessons about God, energy, and demons and doing readings for people, which I started to come around to that day. I noticed that even people I would have avoided or felt unsafe with on my own, respected her or at least stayed away from her. I have a vivid memory of her saying “watch this!” And then with a lasso motion zapping me energetically so hard it makes me wince. That day Sue piled heaps of designer clothes into the trunk of my car which had been donated by the wealthy. As she does this she handed me a piece of paper that had printed on it what I later find out is a piece of “They’re made out of meat” by Terry Bison. They're made out of meat." "Meat?" "Meat. They're made out of meat." "Meat?" "There's no doubt about it. We picked several from different parts of the planet, took them aboard our recon vessels, probed them all the way through. They're completely meat." "That's impossible. What about the radio signals? The messages to the stars." "They use the radio waves to talk, but the signals don't come from them. The signals come from machines." "So who made the machines? That's who we want to contact." "They made the machines. That's what I'm trying to tell you. Meat made the machines." "That's ridiculous. How can meat make a machine? You're asking me to believe in sentient meat." "I'm not asking you, I'm telling you. These creatures are the only sentient race in the sector and they're made out of meat." She asked me if I remember the guy who comes into our coffee shop with a helmet on sometimes, and I say yes, and she suggests he might be an alien because she found this on the table after he left. It is clear to me now that day, November 29th I was beginning to open the question - who am I? I’d been curious of my lineage but also potential past lives. I went back home that night and At 2am still hopped up from the mushrooms I put on some clothes Sue had given me and got in my car feeling called to drive aimlessly. After 15 minutes I reached a glowing indigo Hyatt sign and immediately pulled in. I had just quit my Hyatt job and figured at the very least it could be a job opportunity for me there (as I had just quit working at a Hyatt) When I got there a short, beautiful, and politely unassuming woman greeted me at a desk amidst a beautiful well light welcoming room. She appeared to be completely alone and I immediately felt safe and welcomed by her, though I quickly revealed I wasn’t quite sure why I had intended to show up to the hotel. I went with the flow, the woman asked me if I’d rather be at a cheaper Hyatt down the road and I immediately refused. I went to use the restroom, when I came out there was a single strangely menacing, yet friendly guard. I hung around aimlessly, asking if I could sit on the marble countertops - dressing and acting as if completely in a trance and unashamed of myself and still high on mushrooms. The woman discouraged me because I think I would’ve been seen on the cameras. Instead, I sat down on a comfortable couch and began to converse with her. I felt She was gentle and good hearted but I also felt we were deeply on the same wavelength somehow. She asked me about my life, and I vaguely mentioned it was changing deeply - referring to my experiences with Sue and Psylocibin, without mentioning them. I stared deeply and intently at her, listening to her talk a bit, while in my head I asking questions in my mind “who will I have children with?” “Where do I belong in this life?” Feeling desperate and exhausted by those questions. The woman picked up her can of bright red coke with both hands, 3 fingers facing up on either side, and told me the answers would come to me in a dream. I broke out into surprised, joyful, and astounded laughter and exclaimed “holy shit!” Because in my state it seemed like she was totally clued into what I had going on. Then she said what translated to my trancelike state as something along the lines of, “this isn’t my first rodeo.” At this point, I’m still in an altered state and believe this hotel is somehow heaven? Once our conversation was over, we took the elevator up together, (I think she knew I was high and wanted to make sure nothing went wrong.) I asked for a room on the 4th floor, but she said an entire childrens soccer team was residing and that she’d give me the third. I laughed and thanked her. She asked me a few questions, I don’t remember what they were, but they were easy to answer and I only remember her saying “we just want to make sure what you took was clean.” I’m not sure what she meant by this looking back, but in the moment I thought she was asking me because there was something she didn’t want to share with me if the mushrooms I had taken weren’t safe. Like she wanted to check my purity or something (though I could be imagining that) She lead me to my room, said I could leave the door open, with the latch, when I wanted to come down, and did not give me a key and then she said that she’d be with me all night long. I put my things down, and immediately began to look at myself in the luminescent hotel room mirrors feeling a deep pain and sadness. I slowly and delicately put my hair up, washed my face carefully, got undressed and began to massage lotion into my skin for some reason? Then I looked in the mirror and began to squeeze the gunk out of my skin, believing that I am somehow ridding myself of ancestral curses - famine, disease, rape, pain. I started to form a story line around potential past lives. I’ll spare y’all the details of the rest of my episode because a lot of it still doesn’t make much sense to me. But besides the light I saw, it’s little coincidences that I keep coming back to in my mind that are so strange. Like, The next day I get a haircut, the barber is an eclectic guy and mentions my evil twin sister (something Sue also did) for no apparent reason (I’ve never met the guy before) afterwards I go to the kava bar and immediately meet a random girl who also seems to be in the middle of a psychotic episode. She starts talking about conspiracy theories and stuff and she tells me she is secretly a native woman who just appears to be a black woman. Then she pulls out a pendulum and refers to it as “this thingy” I’m a bit surprised because the night before Sue had shown me how to use one to read yes, no and maybe. I take my new friend Candace back home with me (she reveals to me she has another name she only shares when she feels safe) I don’t remember what it was but when I introduce her to one of my roommates as Candace he says “oh no it’s something more ancient than that” which I find really weird because he’s never met her before (how would he know she had a second name?) and it’s just a weird thing to say in general. I forget I have a therapy appointment that day and am all of a sudden skeptical of my therapist, Candace briefly meets her and then tells me “she was divinely sent” which makes me feel less paranoid and I remember expecting her to say something of the like. It’s also around this time I find 3 dead birds on a bike ride on the ground (3 different species) within exactly 11 minutes and they seem to stand out enough to maybe be trying to tell me something. I asked my friend who is a medicine woman to interpret the meaning, and it feels pretty on point to what happened looking back. In retrospect, not necessarily everything I’ve shared means something extra-ordinary, but I’m curious to hear some other thoughts on what happened, and the context. I put my things down, and immediately began to look at myself in the luminescent hotel room mirrors feeling a deep pain and sadness. I slowly and delicately put my hair up, washed my face carefully, undressed and began to massage lotion into my skin for some reason? Then I looked in the mirror and began to squeeze the gunk out of my skin, believing that I was somehow ridding myself of ancestral curses - famine, disease, rape, pain. I started to form a story line around potential past lives. I laid down in the bed, bluntly put, grabbed my vibrator, and spent hours with a voice in my head I believe to be the woman. She was gentle, wise and delicate, and when I touched myself I felt it was not me but her. She told me things I wanted to understand about original biblical references, the creation of Adam and Eve, or whatever names they were, and I saw and felt at times, that I was birthing other creations amidst the quiet, deep intense, solitude of our connection. It was deeply lovely. I looked at the clock and had an innate sense our time was coming to an end. Completely naked and feeling nothing but gratitude, love, and wonder, I opened the curtains and looked out at the most beautiful cloudy sunrise. I felt I was looking directly at god and not a word had been said all night inside the room. It was one of the most beautiful things ID ever seen - I was truly in it, and I just knew. I forgot, that when I had first checked into the room I had texted the man I was sleeping with, whom I loved, but was feeling confusion around as we were staying only casually connected. I regrettedly called him back (he had tried to call me earlier after I had sent him a series of cryptic texts like “some really cool shit is happening call me when you can.”) I asked him if I could come over, he said “I have some things to do today, can it wait?” I said “no” “he said I guess I can make the time then, or something along those lines.” Still in a complete trancelike state, I got in the car and frantically drove to his house without any real permission, which is painful to think about in retrospect. When I got there, I unassumingly rang the doorbell and he happily let me in as if, or as I thought, he’d been expecting me. I crawled into bed with him and felt safe again, like I had with Sue and with the woman whose name I had learned was Alexandria. I thought I could relax, but then immediately sex ensued again, and I felt both more and less control than I usually did when I was not in this strange state. I don’t remember much except screaming and crying loudly, calling his name and telling him I loved him (which I had never done before) and I remember him saying it back to me. I could feel my spiritual energy was so strong he was responsive to it which was terrifying as it was so new to both of us. In retrospect, I feel we were-him most of all, somewhat blind to what was happening. Sue had told me we had the power to hypnotize men, but I didn’t think I would be doing that so soon. Before I knew it he asked me if I had a condom. I said no only in my car outside. And he pulled out what almost appeared to be a flaming red one directly after asking me if I had mine. I don’t remember putting it on or taking it off. I asked if he’d had sex with anyone else and he said “last week” which was strange and hurt me because I thought we had been sort of accidentally exclusive for the majority of our relationship together - later he revealed he had not had sex. I recall holding his hand and showing each other the birth of creation, me showing him love perhaps, feeling balls of light and darkness as stars circle each other before they explode. After that I only really remember being on top of him, me in complete control, asking him to cum, him saying “I can’t” and then having a massive horrible realization, looking him straight in the face and saying, “ohhhhh you’re the devil aren’t you? You’re beautiful. Oh my god you’re beautiful.” He looked so beautiful and I held his face. Then I was professing my love for him again and again and again even though my heart was breaking as I did because I somehow knew the face looking at me was not capable of love. The rest was a confusing blur. I don’t remember much about leaving him except that it hurt me probably more than the spiritual pain I had experienced in the tent. I felt completely and utterly alone, heart broken, and terrified. Rattled, and in a daze I pulled up my phone directions, and drove for what felt like 20 minutes until I saw a beautifully insane woman, head hung low, dressed in black, almost like a shadow, sitting on the curb, both feet in the road. I slowed down, rolled my window, and asked for Sue. She said yes she’s already at the place with the TV, and she said she wanted something in return. She went to reach for my Bluetooth adapter and without question, I handed it to her. I had learned not to be afraid to lose things, my love and life was the only thing that mattered to me. I drove onward, got on the freeway, and in memory, passed exits I recognized over and over again driving for what felt like an hour, miserable and screaming and crying in pain and fear, windows rolled down wind recklessly pushing and pulling at me, and calling out for Sue, understanding I was time traveling. I remember most vividly seeing the words “Richard blvd” (the name of my exit to Davis” at least twice between sacramento exits. I attempted not to doubt, only to trust, I would arrive home, though I was terrified for my physical and spiritual lives. I don’t remember much about arriving home. I only remember being deeply relieved to be somewhere familiar again. I would stay in this state a few more days…until my parents pulled me out, I believed my mother had died and I felt such agony I was screaming in the room of my house, my roommates rushing in to comfort me. I was not in control enough of myself to remain on those realms in any capacity after the days I had been through. I needed to be recaptured reraptured in love only my family could give me. And I am forever grateful they took me home to them. |
2023.06.08 11:03 LovedLotus My screaming new neighbor from hell
Hello! I am kind of nervous about posting this but would really appreciate any advice!!! Sorry about the brick. TLDR at the bottom!
So maybe around 2 months ago somebody moved in upstairs in the apartment above us. I was laying on my bed and heard the landlord talking to someone right outside my window about moving in. It was a girl talking to him about what she did for work and everything. I didn’t want to really hear it but it was so clear I could just hear it laying in my bed. So shortly after a man moves in. I hear the girl a few more times and that is all. Once they very loudly engaged in adult activities ☠️ . Then later that week she came over and they screamed at each other and yelled horribly until dawn when she left. I think she helped get him the apartment but he for sure made her angry somehow that night and she has not been around since. I hear him all the time now but it has become a serious problem. I have only waited 2 months to do something because I don’t want to be involved in whatever was happening and also I don’t usually complain about noise from my neighbors (until now I guess). I understand that living in close quarters like apartments next to each other that it is natural to hear some sounds since people are living there of course. I have heard plenty of fights in my time. I always just kept it in my mind that I didn’t really mind if they were loud (unless someone sounded like they may be getting hurt then of course I would call for help) if they didn’t mind if sometimes we may be loud (not on purpose). So I have never met this guy. Well shortly after he moved in he started screaming at the top of his lungs all night constantly. It will go on for hours. For example tonight he was been screaming for 6+ hours straight. He will also cuss and yell. He throws things and breaks things. It sounds like a horrible fight. Everyone can’t sleep and gets scared including the poor dog. Back after the first time it happened I went outside and found a note under my windshield wiper. It had been raining so it was kind of hard to read but in very scraggly handwriting (mines not great but this was difficult to read at all) he says he was sorry about the noise that he felt bad and his boss told him to get his act together. He said it was just mental illness. I did not pry. He asked me to forgive him for the noise. So I did. I just never wanted to overstep into someone’s life. He gave me his phone number on that note and asked I texted him. I didn’t want to text at that time and went back to my own things. So anyway two months later and it is still happening. It is not every night but it is common. I have tried to see if everything was alright but he just left me two notes in my mailbox asking me to let it go and saying sorry and to text him. Eventually I did text him just to ask if he was okay. He never did answer. I want to help fix this but I am not sure how. He has also sat besides my window (where the middle of the stairs are that go up to his apartment) and cried really loud. He has also talked to me through my window since it is close to my bed. He has said hello and asked how I am through my window too. The window is closed and I have blinds but he can see in through the sides of them a little where my bed is. I can just cover my window more. I guess I just kept trying to downplay it and not get him in trouble. I have no faith that cops would help. Sometimes a week or so would go by and nothing would happen. He screams for hours and cusses and makes the wildest noises. He fills his lungs with air and screams until his throat is raw and then some more. I have wanted to call the non emergency line to have them do a check up but I have done that before in my life and the cops only made things worse for them plus his notes seemed like he didn’t want me to take action. Tonight he was at it again. Screaming for 6 hours or so non stop just screeching. Things falling, him running down the stairs, crying by my window. This is clearly not going to get any better and I feel like I need to do something. I did tell the landlord and made sure to make it clear I did not want to be involved or get him into any trouble and that I was just worried about him but just wanted to make him aware if he knew of what to do. My landlord is another story so I don’t have a lot of faith in him. It is loud as though somehow is just in the other room screaming. I feel bad for letting it go this long but it was kind of a gradual progression at first. It is really scary, quite uncanny, and keeps us up all night. Has anyone ever experienced something like this and if so what did you do to find a solution? I don’t know if it is mental illness or my gf mentioned maybe drugs or whatever but it’s not really my business in the end but I could really use some help as this screaming is scary and getting out of hand. I have seen a lot of mental illness in my life but this involves a stranger instead of someone I know so I am unsure what to do about it. I just want to make sure things are okay and gonna continue to be okay without stepping over boundaries.
TLDR: neighbor has been screaming at the top of his lungs for 6+ hours a few nights a week and need advice hopefully without being involved or making his situation worse.
submitted by LovedLotus to neighborsfromhell [link] [comments]
So maybe around 2 months ago somebody moved in upstairs in the apartment above us. I was laying on my bed and heard the landlord talking to someone right outside my window about moving in. It was a girl talking to him about what she did for work and everything. I didn’t want to really hear it but it was so clear I could just hear it laying in my bed. So shortly after a man moves in. I hear the girl a few more times and that is all. Once they very loudly engaged in adult activities ☠️ . Then later that week she came over and they screamed at each other and yelled horribly until dawn when she left. I think she helped get him the apartment but he for sure made her angry somehow that night and she has not been around since. I hear him all the time now but it has become a serious problem. I have only waited 2 months to do something because I don’t want to be involved in whatever was happening and also I don’t usually complain about noise from my neighbors (until now I guess). I understand that living in close quarters like apartments next to each other that it is natural to hear some sounds since people are living there of course. I have heard plenty of fights in my time. I always just kept it in my mind that I didn’t really mind if they were loud (unless someone sounded like they may be getting hurt then of course I would call for help) if they didn’t mind if sometimes we may be loud (not on purpose). So I have never met this guy. Well shortly after he moved in he started screaming at the top of his lungs all night constantly. It will go on for hours. For example tonight he was been screaming for 6+ hours straight. He will also cuss and yell. He throws things and breaks things. It sounds like a horrible fight. Everyone can’t sleep and gets scared including the poor dog. Back after the first time it happened I went outside and found a note under my windshield wiper. It had been raining so it was kind of hard to read but in very scraggly handwriting (mines not great but this was difficult to read at all) he says he was sorry about the noise that he felt bad and his boss told him to get his act together. He said it was just mental illness. I did not pry. He asked me to forgive him for the noise. So I did. I just never wanted to overstep into someone’s life. He gave me his phone number on that note and asked I texted him. I didn’t want to text at that time and went back to my own things. So anyway two months later and it is still happening. It is not every night but it is common. I have tried to see if everything was alright but he just left me two notes in my mailbox asking me to let it go and saying sorry and to text him. Eventually I did text him just to ask if he was okay. He never did answer. I want to help fix this but I am not sure how. He has also sat besides my window (where the middle of the stairs are that go up to his apartment) and cried really loud. He has also talked to me through my window since it is close to my bed. He has said hello and asked how I am through my window too. The window is closed and I have blinds but he can see in through the sides of them a little where my bed is. I can just cover my window more. I guess I just kept trying to downplay it and not get him in trouble. I have no faith that cops would help. Sometimes a week or so would go by and nothing would happen. He screams for hours and cusses and makes the wildest noises. He fills his lungs with air and screams until his throat is raw and then some more. I have wanted to call the non emergency line to have them do a check up but I have done that before in my life and the cops only made things worse for them plus his notes seemed like he didn’t want me to take action. Tonight he was at it again. Screaming for 6 hours or so non stop just screeching. Things falling, him running down the stairs, crying by my window. This is clearly not going to get any better and I feel like I need to do something. I did tell the landlord and made sure to make it clear I did not want to be involved or get him into any trouble and that I was just worried about him but just wanted to make him aware if he knew of what to do. My landlord is another story so I don’t have a lot of faith in him. It is loud as though somehow is just in the other room screaming. I feel bad for letting it go this long but it was kind of a gradual progression at first. It is really scary, quite uncanny, and keeps us up all night. Has anyone ever experienced something like this and if so what did you do to find a solution? I don’t know if it is mental illness or my gf mentioned maybe drugs or whatever but it’s not really my business in the end but I could really use some help as this screaming is scary and getting out of hand. I have seen a lot of mental illness in my life but this involves a stranger instead of someone I know so I am unsure what to do about it. I just want to make sure things are okay and gonna continue to be okay without stepping over boundaries.
TLDR: neighbor has been screaming at the top of his lungs for 6+ hours a few nights a week and need advice hopefully without being involved or making his situation worse.
2023.06.08 10:59 Ghostyz_ I feel like my friend is being unfair to me
I'm sorry this is long, I just haven't been able to get this off my mind and I don't know who to talk to about this, and I've been listening to some really sad music and its all I've been able to think about because of it. I'm sorry but I'm going to tell you my long story with a friend of mine.
I'll call her A, we met in a friend group, we've been friends for a while now, maybe about 2 years or so, her and I have been really close, essentially best friends. We used to spend nearly every night together and send pictures of things we were doing and do silly things and cute things and those things I'd imagine in romance movies. She was the first girl i really liked, too, and probably not a good sign. We always said goodnight to each other, we'd send pictures of sunsets and sunrises, we sat in silence enjoying each other's company, we played games together and spent lots of time together and were always open to one another, giving reassurance, comfort, and a listening ear if we ever needed one another. All of the nice things, i associate with her. I really love her. She's a wonderful person. Whenever she got jealous or upset, I reassured her that she was still an amazing person.
But she ended up liking me and another one of her friends, long story short, she chose him over me, she spent time with him while deciding on if she wanted him or I, which just felt like an extra punch to the face, and then he invited me to talk with his friend group and it felt like egged me on by saying A would be there. I hated that. I hated that I knew she would pick him over me, I felt so helpless in those few weeks I waited, I felt annoyed that I had to ask her if she made a decision when it felt like it was already made. But I feel guilty for those things, too.
She still wanted to be friends, and I said I did too, because I did, and I wanted to make it work. We didn't really talk for a bit, but she always came back to say she still wanted to be friends and that she didn't want me to leave our friend group. I decided to distance myself and take time for me. Which felt nice, and eventually, I felt a little bit more comfortable to be in our friend group after a while.
she messaged me every now and then that she missed us hanging out. She missed how we used to spend time together at night, or talk about things or just hang out. Which made me upset, I never expressed that with her, I just said I agreed because I did agree. But it felt unfair that she wanted things like this after she chose him over me. it never felt fair to me.
This has happened a few times, where a friend of ours I talk to, we'll call her B, I have some time with her and we enjoy talking and playing games together and hanging out. And Friend A gets jealous of that, I remember a few nights, I called her, and she was crying because she was upset because she thought I'd forget about her and she was scared of losing me because I was spending time with Friend B and was having fun. I felt bad about it, so I comforted her and reassured her I still like spending time with her because I do, I apologized, and she felt guilty about it. I told her I still valued her, and she told me she valued me a lot, too.
This doesn't feel fair to me, I can't become closer with my friends in our friend group, and I just want her to be happy no matter what, I don't want to disrupt her relationship. She wants us to talk like we used to, and she says how she still thinks of me and misses us. I don't want there to be conflict with her and her boyfriend, i don't want her to feel upset or jealous, I just, ahh I don't know, I DON'T KNOW I feel so stressed, and stuck. I still believe she's a good person because she still cares about me and our friends. She's still kindheared and wonderful. I don't want to leave our friendship behind, not friend A or friend B.
I guess TLDR, a friend of mine we used to like each other, she chose him over me, we still wanted to be friends, but i wanted to take time to myself for a bit. She missed me and the things we used to do, we stayed friends, I came back to out friend group, she got jealous and upset of my friend and I spending time together a few times, I reassured her I still like spending time with her, and she said how she misses us. And I feel lost. something like that, I'm sorry if this was a bad TLDR.
I'm sorry this is so long, and if this is disorganized or doesn't make a lot of sense. I just needed to let this off my chest. I'm sorry if it doesn't make sense, I'm sorry I keep saying sorry.
submitted by Ghostyz_ to TrueOffMyChest [link] [comments]
I'll call her A, we met in a friend group, we've been friends for a while now, maybe about 2 years or so, her and I have been really close, essentially best friends. We used to spend nearly every night together and send pictures of things we were doing and do silly things and cute things and those things I'd imagine in romance movies. She was the first girl i really liked, too, and probably not a good sign. We always said goodnight to each other, we'd send pictures of sunsets and sunrises, we sat in silence enjoying each other's company, we played games together and spent lots of time together and were always open to one another, giving reassurance, comfort, and a listening ear if we ever needed one another. All of the nice things, i associate with her. I really love her. She's a wonderful person. Whenever she got jealous or upset, I reassured her that she was still an amazing person.
But she ended up liking me and another one of her friends, long story short, she chose him over me, she spent time with him while deciding on if she wanted him or I, which just felt like an extra punch to the face, and then he invited me to talk with his friend group and it felt like egged me on by saying A would be there. I hated that. I hated that I knew she would pick him over me, I felt so helpless in those few weeks I waited, I felt annoyed that I had to ask her if she made a decision when it felt like it was already made. But I feel guilty for those things, too.
She still wanted to be friends, and I said I did too, because I did, and I wanted to make it work. We didn't really talk for a bit, but she always came back to say she still wanted to be friends and that she didn't want me to leave our friend group. I decided to distance myself and take time for me. Which felt nice, and eventually, I felt a little bit more comfortable to be in our friend group after a while.
she messaged me every now and then that she missed us hanging out. She missed how we used to spend time together at night, or talk about things or just hang out. Which made me upset, I never expressed that with her, I just said I agreed because I did agree. But it felt unfair that she wanted things like this after she chose him over me. it never felt fair to me.
This has happened a few times, where a friend of ours I talk to, we'll call her B, I have some time with her and we enjoy talking and playing games together and hanging out. And Friend A gets jealous of that, I remember a few nights, I called her, and she was crying because she was upset because she thought I'd forget about her and she was scared of losing me because I was spending time with Friend B and was having fun. I felt bad about it, so I comforted her and reassured her I still like spending time with her because I do, I apologized, and she felt guilty about it. I told her I still valued her, and she told me she valued me a lot, too.
This doesn't feel fair to me, I can't become closer with my friends in our friend group, and I just want her to be happy no matter what, I don't want to disrupt her relationship. She wants us to talk like we used to, and she says how she still thinks of me and misses us. I don't want there to be conflict with her and her boyfriend, i don't want her to feel upset or jealous, I just, ahh I don't know, I DON'T KNOW I feel so stressed, and stuck. I still believe she's a good person because she still cares about me and our friends. She's still kindheared and wonderful. I don't want to leave our friendship behind, not friend A or friend B.
I guess TLDR, a friend of mine we used to like each other, she chose him over me, we still wanted to be friends, but i wanted to take time to myself for a bit. She missed me and the things we used to do, we stayed friends, I came back to out friend group, she got jealous and upset of my friend and I spending time together a few times, I reassured her I still like spending time with her, and she said how she misses us. And I feel lost. something like that, I'm sorry if this was a bad TLDR.
I'm sorry this is so long, and if this is disorganized or doesn't make a lot of sense. I just needed to let this off my chest. I'm sorry if it doesn't make sense, I'm sorry I keep saying sorry.
2023.06.08 10:57 Quick_East_7284 How to open up to my girlfriend better?
We’ve been dating over a year now, and it’s perfect. Except I am just so shit at telling her how i feel. When we were drunk one time we cried to each other for like an hour, and i stupidly let her know that there’s some shit in my past i need to tell her, but wasn’t ready to yet. This was maybe 5 months ago now and it just feels like she’s waiting and waiting for me to finally tell her, which makes it even harder to. She’ll sometimes bring it up and ask a little question about it, which i vaguely answer and try to get on with what we’re doing. What i need to tell her though is about my past with another girl and how that affected me. She knows this certain girl exists but i’ve never explicitly said we used to go out, now i feel like it’s too late and i’ve lied to her for too long. Any advice would be so helpful, Thanks
submitted by Quick_East_7284 to Advice [link] [comments]
2023.06.08 10:50 Throwaway16984 I want to be pretty like a girl
Hi everyone I'm not sure where to start with this post. I am a 19 year old boy and I've noticed that for the last couple years or so I always find myself thinking that I wish I was pretty like a girl. I do not think I am an ugly person at all and I've never felt like my sense of identity was closely tied to my gender although I am fairly certain that despite not being the most masculine person alive I have been a boy throughout my life in all the obvious ways I can think of. That said, I'm not sure when this exactly started but I always find myself desperately wanting to look and feel like a girl, I want to be pretty in a feminine way that is virtually impossible for me to ever achieve I think probably even if I went through a transition. I find myself always thinking that I wish I was a girl in all the little ways that currently feel like I cannot achieve, like how people perceive me initially and the nuances of social interaction and the feeling pretty in a girl way rather than handsome in a boy way if that makes sense (although I do think being seen as good looking does make me feel better to some extent). I'm not sure if this feeling is simply because I often get upset at the way people view me at first since I am guy as well as not feeling very desirable often which could be things I could change or if it's something else. I don't really feel trans, well idk how that's supposed to feel actually but I do feel the man part within me is a v solid internalized part but I also wish it wasn't? Idk what it is I'm asking of this sub exactly perhaps if anyone has ever felt like this and what to do about it?
submitted by Throwaway16984 to asktransgender [link] [comments]
2023.06.08 10:44 shayney13 Came to Broadway from Down Under! 7 shows in 6 days!
 | I was super lucky to be able to visit Broadway for the second time in my life (never thought it would ever be possible!) - I will give a quick rundown of the shows I saw and what I thought! submitted by shayney13 to Broadway [link] [comments] Thursday 25th May - &Juliet - 9/10 I got Rush tickets for &Juliet which were front row and honestly not too bad! I almost didn’t see this however had watched a slime tutorial back from when it was on the west end and had loved it and even though I have just moved to Aus from NZ and will hopefully be able to see it here I wanted to go into the tony’s seeing most of the nominated shows. The cast were excellent - especially betsy Wolfe and Melanie La Barrie and it’s just such a fun show! I’m not usually a huge fan of Jukebox musicals but I love the book of &Juliet and think it’s just very clever. It doesn’t take itself too seriously but also doesn’t feel like the songs are just chucked in there. I got to stage door and met most of the cast too who were all lovely! Friday 26th May - Funny Girl - 8/10 Was great to see Lea Michele on broadway and she was absolutely phenomenal! I really enjoyed the show, thought the cast was great, I quite liked the story and the music as well so overall really enjoyed it. I got to meet Lea at stage door and she signed my playbill :) Saturday 27th May - Kimberly Akimbo - 10/10 I was absolutely blown away by this show. It was hilarious and heartbreaking and the show that has stuck with me the most from this trip. The character depth, the themes, and the plot were all fantastic. I loved the score and the cast so much too. I had to stage door after my final Saturday show because I didn’t have time after my three show day but I got to meet Victoria, Bonnie, Justin, and Steve who were all lovely. I really hope this show sweeps the Tony’s because it’s phenomenal. Saturday 27th May - Titanique - 8.5/10 This show was hilarious. I laughed so so so much. It was a great story, and a great time at the theatre. I don’t feel the score added much but maybe because I didn’t know all of the Celine Dion songs some things may have gone over my head. Overall an absolute blast!! Saturday 27th May - Some Like it Hot - 8/10 I really enjoyed this show, despite not having super high expectations. This felt like a Broadway show, the dancing, the sets, everything about it was super well done. The cast were great and I enjoyed the story and found myself laughing a fair bit. I’m a big fan of SMASH so felt a little let down by the score - some of the songs felt like SMASH rejects or just blended in with each other but there were definitely some standouts. Overall a very very fun show! After rushing to the booth theatre to stage door there, I was able to come back and met Adrianna Hicks who was so lovely and J Harrison Ghee who looked like they would rather be anywhere else than there lol. Side note: Three show day was hectic but doable! Even though KA started a little late I was still able to make it to Titanique, pee, and have plenty of time before it started (especially because it also started late) and then make it back for SLIH. Sunday 28th May - Shucked - 8.5/10 I think I had my hopes a little too high for this show and ended up getting let down a little. On paper this show is right up my alley because I love the songwriters and country music (especially Kacey Musgrave’s, Maren Morris etc). Overall I enjoyed the story of this show, but I think the absolute high point is the score which I don’t hear many people talking about. I definitely may be biased because I love the songwriters but I adored the score it is absolutely beautiful. Alex Newell was phenomenal as well! I think the rest of the cast were also fantastic! I think it was funny but no where near way funnier than most of what else I’d seen on Broadway and the other shows didn’t have to rely on one liners to do it. When Shucked was funny, it was funny, but when it fell flat you could tell. I don’t think this is inherently an issue but when it’s marketed as being the funniest show on Broadway, I was expecting it to be funnier than Kimberly Akimbo and SLIH which it was slightly, but not enough. I don’t think this is an issue with the show, as much as my expectations and overall I had a blast and have Walls, woman of the world, friends, and independently owned on REPEAT. I was also very tired as had had a busy morning and was also stressed about getting to Taylor Swift after the show so that may have added to me not being in the best headspace for the show! I stage doored and got to meet Kevin Cahoon who was lovely, Grey Hanson, also lovely and Traci Elaine Lee who played Maizy and was FANTASTIC! Monday 29th May - Got to see 54 sings Kelly Clarkson which was iconic. My two loves, theatre and Kelly Clarkson coming together was amazing. And bucket list moment to go to 54 below! Wednesday 31st May - Parade 8.5/10 Not sure why I picked the saddest show to end my trip, but I really enjoyed Parade. Michaela and Ben were phenomenal, as were the rest of the cast and the show was heartbreaking but wonderful. I really enjoyed it. Surprised this was the show that had the worst audience behaviour, people on phones, as soon as the show ended two 60ish year olds were prepping to get in a fight, all very distracting :(. Overall I had an absolutely amazing trip and felt so privileged to get to see all these shows!! (Also got to see Ham4Ham with SLIH, Shucked, and Parade!!! —————————— Bonus: My shows from my last US trip Dear Evan Hansen 10/10 - Saw this two weeks before it closed - had been wanting to watch it for forever and I absolutely loved it and wasn’t let down. I know the show has it’s critics but honestly I love it. Hadestown 10/10 - Loved this show so so so much don’t know what else to say The devil wears Prada (in Chicago) - 5/10 - Honestly don’t remember much, the music wasn’t very memorable and the show was ‘fine’ I guess. Hopefully they’ve managed to make some changes! Mean Girls tour in Houston - 6.5/10 I enjoyed the show when I wasn’t incredibly anxious I was getting permanent hearing damage from how loud the sound was. Nothing crazy to write home about but I enjoyed it! The Prom on tour in LA (twice) 9/10 - I love this show so much - it was beautiful, hilarious, so much fun. You could tell the budget for the tour wasn’t too high because the sets were pretty lacklustre but I loved this wee show and the cast were amazing. https://preview.redd.it/1ur1zv06br4b1.jpg?width=1536&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=484e925c9d7f382da837e2617f931e965a573018 https://preview.redd.it/nbc72v06br4b1.jpg?width=769&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=0502e994dbff8dc9e9c5d4ceb2a83c53265997e6 https://preview.redd.it/szojgx06br4b1.jpg?width=769&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=08d6907c9a591307a1c53fed26c580b14017864d https://preview.redd.it/gcdzmt06br4b1.jpg?width=769&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=668eaf474591ffb95267a15e7607be2bdda8a404 https://preview.redd.it/38cnbu06br4b1.jpg?width=769&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=976df1739667ed6f390a9f402b4488de3192ac5d https://preview.redd.it/i4rkgw06br4b1.jpg?width=769&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6f2b04c1a135ea47bb1bf446926f6f102b0fb8a5 https://preview.redd.it/1ahvqv06br4b1.jpg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=790359bdb42ba32c9e19381015c9ec252689415c |
2023.06.08 10:44 WesternSol I gotta talk about space dandy season 1
I just finished it, and was absolutely blown away. This is one of the few 10/10 shows I've ever seen. There is no overarching plot, but the setting is consistent each episode. Each vignette was unique, wholesome, thought-provoking, and either funny or sad as all hell. I'd definitely suggest a watch, and if you don't want to be spoiled I'd stop now. I'm going to focus on my 2 favorite episodes, which just so happen to be the really sad emotional ones (go figure).
But before that, I want to talk about the setting and tone. Its located in the future in space, where aliens and FTL/warp are common sites. The setting is deceptively light, with an optimistic retro throwback japanese hooligan style papering over a world with some rather dark facets. Even though there's a diverse range of aliens, not all of them are friendly (and the government is not friendly to all of them), and sometimes it can be difficult to tell who. There is rampant use of AI which is shown later to be essentially robo-slavery. And there is an intergalactic war occurring in the background.
With this in mind, lets start with episode 5. What makes this episode so powerful is the soundtrack. Let me explain: Dandy is essentially a space bounty hunter. He looks for new and/or dangerous species and (in the case of the former) abducts them to be recorded or (in the case of the latter) detained by the government (they never discuss what happens after that). To be honest, the system is never explained that well, for example there are lots of places where they "know" there are undiscovered species, which doesn't really make any sense considering said species are undiscovered. But anyway, this episode, Dandy hunts an alien from the dangerous list that can put peoples consciousnesses in other peoples bodies. The catch is this one is a little girl who has lost her only parent to a disease. This species is famously insular because the government and people who want to use them hunt them down, so this little girl has literally no one to turn to. She doesn't exactly come quietly, but she doesn't resist too much, and offers to allow Dandy to arrest her if he'll take her to her grandpa's old place before taking her to jail.
Its your typical lone wolf and cub story, where they start to care about each other because of their close proximity while traveling. He takes her to restaurants, the carnival, the movies, etc. The scenes themselves all seem to be rather happy, but the music is not. The lyrics that play over the montage ask "Is this a sad thing? Is this a delightful thing? I'll go check it out and then I want to show you, so please wait for me." Because this represents the girls inner monologue. She never got the chance to do anything fun with her mother, so she doesn't know whether to be sad that she's gone or happy to have these experiences. It also displays her hookup on the mother "leaving her behind". The thing that it reminded me of immediately was JJK when Sukuna tells the Lava dude that "he doesn't know what emotions/tears are either", but this is so much more effective because of the contradiction between the music and the scene and its sincerity instead of making the character say something cool and edgy. It ends happily eventually but I don't want to spoil anymore.
Lastly, lets talk about episode 12. This episode revolves around Dandy's AI vacuum QT falling in love with a coffee making robot at a coffee shop. The episode starts with the Narrator telling us that for robots, keeping memory usage low is important. Immediately followed by QT saying "The universe is full of waste. Particularly wasteful are the emotions felt by living beings, such as 'love' and 'affection'" When the trio goes to get coffee, QT becomes infatuated with the coffee maker after hearing her laugh. He keeps coming in, buying things, and making himself useful to go see her even though no one on the crew drinks coffee, least of all him. As a robot, if his circuits get wet, its over. Eventually his room on the ship is full of coffee stuff.
She tells him that she's jealous that he can move around. As a coffee maker she's static and can't explore anywhere. Later that night, he steals her and takes her around the town exploring as a "date". Around this time she begins to malfunction, and is thrown away to a floating trash heap with all the other broken (read, emotional) AI appliances. QT learns about this and goes to save her, where he learns that she loved the cash register the whole time, and that most of the robots left in the trash heap, not her but including the register, plan to combine into a death robot and destroy the city . She asks QT to stop the register from joining the death robot so he'll be safe, and QT fights the giant robot and stops it from destroying the city, but takes major damage in the process. The episode ends with a busted up QT sitting in his now remarkably coffee-free room. Aside from a single cup. He recites the mantra from the last paragraph and downs the cup, killing himself.
I love this episode because it touches on the AI ethics, which always touches on the "What defines the human experience" question. Its clear that the AI are almost (if not just) as sentient as humans are. And that despite that they are treated as tools or slaves rather than people. Dandy is incapable of cleaning up after himself or refueling his own ship without QT. I mean just the concept of being literally chained to your job and unable to physically move from your employment location is thought provoking. The episode also touches on difficulties dating and finding love. But what really got me was that mantra and the ending. The repeated mantra is meant to be ironic after a fashion, after all, it was QTs "love and affection" for the coffee maker that compelled him to save the city. But it also reaffirms that his beliefs have not changed due to his experience, and that, having felt and been let down by these feelings, he doesn't want to live anymore. It reminds me of Fraudrin in the Seven Deadly Sins saying "I don't want to understand". The "I'm too stuck to change and I just want it to be over already".
All in all, either of these episodes could've been well respected OVA's in their own right, and I highly recommend that people check out Space Dandy. They wont regret it.
submitted by WesternSol to CharacterRant [link] [comments]
But before that, I want to talk about the setting and tone. Its located in the future in space, where aliens and FTL/warp are common sites. The setting is deceptively light, with an optimistic retro throwback japanese hooligan style papering over a world with some rather dark facets. Even though there's a diverse range of aliens, not all of them are friendly (and the government is not friendly to all of them), and sometimes it can be difficult to tell who. There is rampant use of AI which is shown later to be essentially robo-slavery. And there is an intergalactic war occurring in the background.
With this in mind, lets start with episode 5. What makes this episode so powerful is the soundtrack. Let me explain: Dandy is essentially a space bounty hunter. He looks for new and/or dangerous species and (in the case of the former) abducts them to be recorded or (in the case of the latter) detained by the government (they never discuss what happens after that). To be honest, the system is never explained that well, for example there are lots of places where they "know" there are undiscovered species, which doesn't really make any sense considering said species are undiscovered. But anyway, this episode, Dandy hunts an alien from the dangerous list that can put peoples consciousnesses in other peoples bodies. The catch is this one is a little girl who has lost her only parent to a disease. This species is famously insular because the government and people who want to use them hunt them down, so this little girl has literally no one to turn to. She doesn't exactly come quietly, but she doesn't resist too much, and offers to allow Dandy to arrest her if he'll take her to her grandpa's old place before taking her to jail.
Its your typical lone wolf and cub story, where they start to care about each other because of their close proximity while traveling. He takes her to restaurants, the carnival, the movies, etc. The scenes themselves all seem to be rather happy, but the music is not. The lyrics that play over the montage ask "Is this a sad thing? Is this a delightful thing? I'll go check it out and then I want to show you, so please wait for me." Because this represents the girls inner monologue. She never got the chance to do anything fun with her mother, so she doesn't know whether to be sad that she's gone or happy to have these experiences. It also displays her hookup on the mother "leaving her behind". The thing that it reminded me of immediately was JJK when Sukuna tells the Lava dude that "he doesn't know what emotions/tears are either", but this is so much more effective because of the contradiction between the music and the scene and its sincerity instead of making the character say something cool and edgy. It ends happily eventually but I don't want to spoil anymore.
Lastly, lets talk about episode 12. This episode revolves around Dandy's AI vacuum QT falling in love with a coffee making robot at a coffee shop. The episode starts with the Narrator telling us that for robots, keeping memory usage low is important. Immediately followed by QT saying "The universe is full of waste. Particularly wasteful are the emotions felt by living beings, such as 'love' and 'affection'" When the trio goes to get coffee, QT becomes infatuated with the coffee maker after hearing her laugh. He keeps coming in, buying things, and making himself useful to go see her even though no one on the crew drinks coffee, least of all him. As a robot, if his circuits get wet, its over. Eventually his room on the ship is full of coffee stuff.
She tells him that she's jealous that he can move around. As a coffee maker she's static and can't explore anywhere. Later that night, he steals her and takes her around the town exploring as a "date". Around this time she begins to malfunction, and is thrown away to a floating trash heap with all the other broken (read, emotional) AI appliances. QT learns about this and goes to save her, where he learns that she loved the cash register the whole time, and that most of the robots left in the trash heap, not her but including the register, plan to combine into a death robot and destroy the city . She asks QT to stop the register from joining the death robot so he'll be safe, and QT fights the giant robot and stops it from destroying the city, but takes major damage in the process. The episode ends with a busted up QT sitting in his now remarkably coffee-free room. Aside from a single cup. He recites the mantra from the last paragraph and downs the cup, killing himself.
I love this episode because it touches on the AI ethics, which always touches on the "What defines the human experience" question. Its clear that the AI are almost (if not just) as sentient as humans are. And that despite that they are treated as tools or slaves rather than people. Dandy is incapable of cleaning up after himself or refueling his own ship without QT. I mean just the concept of being literally chained to your job and unable to physically move from your employment location is thought provoking. The episode also touches on difficulties dating and finding love. But what really got me was that mantra and the ending. The repeated mantra is meant to be ironic after a fashion, after all, it was QTs "love and affection" for the coffee maker that compelled him to save the city. But it also reaffirms that his beliefs have not changed due to his experience, and that, having felt and been let down by these feelings, he doesn't want to live anymore. It reminds me of Fraudrin in the Seven Deadly Sins saying "I don't want to understand". The "I'm too stuck to change and I just want it to be over already".
All in all, either of these episodes could've been well respected OVA's in their own right, and I highly recommend that people check out Space Dandy. They wont regret it.
2023.06.08 10:42 Ghostyz_ I feel like my friend is being unfair to me.
I'm sorry this is long, I just haven't been able to get this off my mind and I don't know who to talk to about this, and I've been listening to some really sad music and its all I've been able to think about because of it. I'm sorry but I'm going to tell you my long story with a friend of mine.
I'll call her A, we met in a friend group, we've been friends for a while now, maybe about 2 years or so, her and I have been really close, essentially best friends. We used to spend nearly every night together and send pictures of things we were doing and do silly things and cute things and those things I'd imagine in romance movies. She was the first girl i really liked, too, and probably not a good sign. We always said goodnight to each other, we'd send pictures of sunsets and sunrises, we sat in silence enjoying each other's company, we played games together and spent lots of time together and were always open to one another, giving reassurance, comfort, and a listening ear if we ever needed one another. All of the nice things, i associate with her. I really love her. She's a wonderful person. Whenever she got jealous or upset, I reassured her that she was still an amazing person.
But she ended up liking me and another one of her friends, long story short, she chose him over me, she spent time with him while deciding on if she wanted him or I, which just felt like an extra punch to the face, and then he invited me to talk with his friend group and it felt like egged me on by saying A would be there. I hated that. I hated that I knew she would pick him over me, I felt so helpless in those few weeks I waited, I felt annoyed that I had to ask her if she made a decision when it felt like it was already made. But I feel guilty for those things, too.
She still wanted to be friends, and I said I did too, because I did, and I wanted to make it work. We didn't really talk for a bit, but she always came back to say she still wanted to be friends and that she didn't want me to leave our friend group. I decided to distance myself and take time for me. Which felt nice, and eventually, I felt a little bit more comfortable to be in our friend group after a while.
she messaged me every now and then that she missed us hanging out. She missed how we used to spend time together at night, or talk about things or just hang out. Which made me upset, I never expressed that with her, I just said I agreed because I did agree. But it felt unfair that she wanted things like this after she chose him over me. it never felt fair to me.
This has happened a few times, where a friend of ours I talk to, we'll call her B, I have some time with her and we enjoy talking and playing games together and hanging out. And Friend A gets jealous of that, I remember a few nights, I called her, and she was crying because she was upset because she thought I'd forget about her and she was scared of losing me because I was spending time with Friend B and was having fun. I felt bad about it, so I comforted her and reassured her I still like spending time with her because I do, I apologized, and she felt guilty about it. I told her I still valued her, and she told me she valued me a lot, too.
This doesn't feel fair to me, I can't become closer with my friends in our friend group, and I just want her to be happy no matter what, I don't want to disrupt her relationship. She wants us to talk like we used to, and she says how she still thinks of me and misses us. I don't want there to be conflict with her and her boyfriend, i don't want her to feel upset or jealous, I just, ahh I don't know, I DON'T KNOW I feel so stressed, and stuck. I still believe she's a good person because she still cares about me and our friends. She's still kindheared and wonderful. I don't want to leave our friendship behind, not friend A or friend B.
I guess TLDR, a friend of mine we used to like each other, she chose him over me, we still wanted to be friends, but i wanted to take time to myself for a bit. She missed me and the things we used to do, we stayed friends, I came back to out friend group, she got jealous and upset of my friend and I spending time together a few times, I reassured her I still like spending time with her, and she said how she misses us. And I feel lost. something like that, I'm sorry if this was a bad TLDR.
I'm sorry this is so long, and if this is disorganized or doesn't make a lot of sense or is super long. I just needed to let this off my chest. I'm sorry if it doesn't make sense, I'm sorry I keep saying sorry.
submitted by Ghostyz_ to offmychest [link] [comments]
I'll call her A, we met in a friend group, we've been friends for a while now, maybe about 2 years or so, her and I have been really close, essentially best friends. We used to spend nearly every night together and send pictures of things we were doing and do silly things and cute things and those things I'd imagine in romance movies. She was the first girl i really liked, too, and probably not a good sign. We always said goodnight to each other, we'd send pictures of sunsets and sunrises, we sat in silence enjoying each other's company, we played games together and spent lots of time together and were always open to one another, giving reassurance, comfort, and a listening ear if we ever needed one another. All of the nice things, i associate with her. I really love her. She's a wonderful person. Whenever she got jealous or upset, I reassured her that she was still an amazing person.
But she ended up liking me and another one of her friends, long story short, she chose him over me, she spent time with him while deciding on if she wanted him or I, which just felt like an extra punch to the face, and then he invited me to talk with his friend group and it felt like egged me on by saying A would be there. I hated that. I hated that I knew she would pick him over me, I felt so helpless in those few weeks I waited, I felt annoyed that I had to ask her if she made a decision when it felt like it was already made. But I feel guilty for those things, too.
She still wanted to be friends, and I said I did too, because I did, and I wanted to make it work. We didn't really talk for a bit, but she always came back to say she still wanted to be friends and that she didn't want me to leave our friend group. I decided to distance myself and take time for me. Which felt nice, and eventually, I felt a little bit more comfortable to be in our friend group after a while.
she messaged me every now and then that she missed us hanging out. She missed how we used to spend time together at night, or talk about things or just hang out. Which made me upset, I never expressed that with her, I just said I agreed because I did agree. But it felt unfair that she wanted things like this after she chose him over me. it never felt fair to me.
This has happened a few times, where a friend of ours I talk to, we'll call her B, I have some time with her and we enjoy talking and playing games together and hanging out. And Friend A gets jealous of that, I remember a few nights, I called her, and she was crying because she was upset because she thought I'd forget about her and she was scared of losing me because I was spending time with Friend B and was having fun. I felt bad about it, so I comforted her and reassured her I still like spending time with her because I do, I apologized, and she felt guilty about it. I told her I still valued her, and she told me she valued me a lot, too.
This doesn't feel fair to me, I can't become closer with my friends in our friend group, and I just want her to be happy no matter what, I don't want to disrupt her relationship. She wants us to talk like we used to, and she says how she still thinks of me and misses us. I don't want there to be conflict with her and her boyfriend, i don't want her to feel upset or jealous, I just, ahh I don't know, I DON'T KNOW I feel so stressed, and stuck. I still believe she's a good person because she still cares about me and our friends. She's still kindheared and wonderful. I don't want to leave our friendship behind, not friend A or friend B.
I guess TLDR, a friend of mine we used to like each other, she chose him over me, we still wanted to be friends, but i wanted to take time to myself for a bit. She missed me and the things we used to do, we stayed friends, I came back to out friend group, she got jealous and upset of my friend and I spending time together a few times, I reassured her I still like spending time with her, and she said how she misses us. And I feel lost. something like that, I'm sorry if this was a bad TLDR.
I'm sorry this is so long, and if this is disorganized or doesn't make a lot of sense or is super long. I just needed to let this off my chest. I'm sorry if it doesn't make sense, I'm sorry I keep saying sorry.
2023.06.08 10:41 ThrowRA_kisuhari i (21f) am not sure if my friend's (m22) behaviour is "just friendly" anymore after talking to a close friend
i (21f) was recently having a conversation with a friend D (also 21f) about our mutual friend K (22m), who we have known for several months now. i was telling her about the dynamic between K and i, to which she said it sounds like K might like me as more than a friend, and was curious as to what others thought.
for added context, I have a closer friendship with K due to being more free to hang out and willing to spend time with him more than D. K is from Norway and will be leaving the country I live in in early July of this year to return back home.
now here are the things that made her think that he might think of me as more than a friend.
for starters, he often lets me stay over at his place to sleep during the day if I get exhausted after work, as his residence is closer to my workplace than mine is. I'll go over there and sleep for a couple hours, then wake up and chill for a few more before going home.
this is where the "more than friends" things begin to come into play.
he will ask me to wrestle with him (which I have a couple times and lost incredibly quickly due to our size difference, with him being 6'1 and I being 5'3) or he'll pick me up throw me around, often onto his bed while teasing me to eat more because I'm supposedly "light" in weight. whenever we do "fight" he likes to pin my legs and knees and tease me about how i won't be able to escape.
if I'm lying down on my stomach or back on his bed, he will occasionally just come over and collapse on top of me, explaining how he's bored and wants to be entertained. when I complain he's like a heavy weighted blanket, he'll laugh and tell me to deal with it as he scrolls on his phone, and we'll stay like like for like a half hour or so. whenever I tried to move to make myself more comfortable, he would grab my legs with his hands to stop me from moving so much.
the most recent thing he did was a couple days ago, when I was sitting up against his headboard. he climbed onto the bed without saying a word, grabbed a pillow, put it against my legs and leaned back on it, essentially using me as a chair of sorts with the pillow as a barrier between us. after about five minutes of this, he complained that his neck was tired and rested it back on my collarbone (? english isn't my first language, so bear with me) as he continued to scroll through his phone. occasionally he'd turn back his head to look at me and show me something, and his face would be so close with his hair tickling my neck, which would make me panic internally of sorts.
he's also said a couple times about how I need a boyfriend to keep me warm (as I get cold easily), his preferences and types (although it never goes anything above PG) and teases me for being "innocent" due to being inexperienced when it comes to dating and relationships. we also tend to tease each other a lot, and he has no problem in taking off his shirt and changing in front of me, often bragging to me about how he has "abs".
there's also been a few instances where we've been with friends and i've gotten intoxicated and he's let me use him as a pillow of sorts. apparently every time I would wake up, he would pat my hair and shush me to go back to sleep and would pretty much take care of me for most of the night until it was time for me to head home.
we tend to also message each other very often throughout the day, and call for hours on end several times a week, and he often says things like how he wants a hug, he misses snuggling with someone, how i was comfortable, etc, etc.
I know a lot about him, such as his past relationships and how he would never make the first move when it comes to a girl, as he is afraid of being accused of something he didn't do later on. he also calls me his closest and most favourite friend, which makes me think he only does just see me as one, but he also doesn't do this with our other female friends. he also often says how he wants a girlfriend, but also just wants to work on himself.
i cannot tell if this is normal behaviour between male and female friends, and want to know what others may think.
again, apologies if there are some things that don't make sense, as english isn't my first language, and if there was too much information. it's just that since my friend has suggested he could see me as something more, it's been on my mind a lot and has me analysing every interaction between us. this is also my first time posting on reddit, so again, apologies if this post is a little messy.
TLDR: friend thinks my male friend might think of me as more than just a friend due to things he does. also posted on relationships and relationship_advice. i'm just trying to get as many different opinions as possible, as i'm very confused on what to think or do.
submitted by ThrowRA_kisuhari to Advice [link] [comments]
for added context, I have a closer friendship with K due to being more free to hang out and willing to spend time with him more than D. K is from Norway and will be leaving the country I live in in early July of this year to return back home.
now here are the things that made her think that he might think of me as more than a friend.
for starters, he often lets me stay over at his place to sleep during the day if I get exhausted after work, as his residence is closer to my workplace than mine is. I'll go over there and sleep for a couple hours, then wake up and chill for a few more before going home.
this is where the "more than friends" things begin to come into play.
he will ask me to wrestle with him (which I have a couple times and lost incredibly quickly due to our size difference, with him being 6'1 and I being 5'3) or he'll pick me up throw me around, often onto his bed while teasing me to eat more because I'm supposedly "light" in weight. whenever we do "fight" he likes to pin my legs and knees and tease me about how i won't be able to escape.
if I'm lying down on my stomach or back on his bed, he will occasionally just come over and collapse on top of me, explaining how he's bored and wants to be entertained. when I complain he's like a heavy weighted blanket, he'll laugh and tell me to deal with it as he scrolls on his phone, and we'll stay like like for like a half hour or so. whenever I tried to move to make myself more comfortable, he would grab my legs with his hands to stop me from moving so much.
the most recent thing he did was a couple days ago, when I was sitting up against his headboard. he climbed onto the bed without saying a word, grabbed a pillow, put it against my legs and leaned back on it, essentially using me as a chair of sorts with the pillow as a barrier between us. after about five minutes of this, he complained that his neck was tired and rested it back on my collarbone (? english isn't my first language, so bear with me) as he continued to scroll through his phone. occasionally he'd turn back his head to look at me and show me something, and his face would be so close with his hair tickling my neck, which would make me panic internally of sorts.
he's also said a couple times about how I need a boyfriend to keep me warm (as I get cold easily), his preferences and types (although it never goes anything above PG) and teases me for being "innocent" due to being inexperienced when it comes to dating and relationships. we also tend to tease each other a lot, and he has no problem in taking off his shirt and changing in front of me, often bragging to me about how he has "abs".
there's also been a few instances where we've been with friends and i've gotten intoxicated and he's let me use him as a pillow of sorts. apparently every time I would wake up, he would pat my hair and shush me to go back to sleep and would pretty much take care of me for most of the night until it was time for me to head home.
we tend to also message each other very often throughout the day, and call for hours on end several times a week, and he often says things like how he wants a hug, he misses snuggling with someone, how i was comfortable, etc, etc.
I know a lot about him, such as his past relationships and how he would never make the first move when it comes to a girl, as he is afraid of being accused of something he didn't do later on. he also calls me his closest and most favourite friend, which makes me think he only does just see me as one, but he also doesn't do this with our other female friends. he also often says how he wants a girlfriend, but also just wants to work on himself.
i cannot tell if this is normal behaviour between male and female friends, and want to know what others may think.
again, apologies if there are some things that don't make sense, as english isn't my first language, and if there was too much information. it's just that since my friend has suggested he could see me as something more, it's been on my mind a lot and has me analysing every interaction between us. this is also my first time posting on reddit, so again, apologies if this post is a little messy.
TLDR: friend thinks my male friend might think of me as more than just a friend due to things he does. also posted on relationships and relationship_advice. i'm just trying to get as many different opinions as possible, as i'm very confused on what to think or do.
2023.06.08 10:36 ThrowRA_kisuhari i (21f) am not sure if my friend's (m22) behaviour is "just friendly" anymore after talking to a close friend
i (21f) was recently having a conversation with a friend D (also 21f) about our mutual friend K (22m), who we have known for several months now.
i was telling her about the dynamic between K and i, to which she said it sounds like K might like me as more than a friend, and was curious as to what others thought.
for added context, I have a closer friendship with K due to being more free to hang out and willing to spend time with him more than D. K is from Norway and will be leaving the country I live in in early July of this year to return back home.
now here are the things that made her think that he might think of me as more than a friend.
for starters, he often lets me stay over at his place to sleep during the day if I get exhausted after work, as his residence is closer to my workplace than mine is. I'll go over there and sleep for a couple hours, then wake up and chill for a few more before going home.
this is where the "more than friends" things begin to come into play. he will ask me to wrestle with him (which I have a couple times and lost incredibly quickly due to our size difference, with him being 6'1 and I being 5'3) or he'll pick me up throw me around, often onto his bed while teasing me to eat more because I'm supposedly "light" in weight. whenever we do "fight" he likes to pin my legs and knees and tease me about how i won't be able to escape.
if I'm lying down on my stomach or back on his bed, he will occasionally just come over and collapse on top of me, explaining how he's bored and wants to be entertained. when I complain he's like a heavy weighted blanket, he'll laugh and tell me to deal with it as he scrolls on his phone, and we'll stay like like for like a half hour or so. whenever I tried to move to make myself more comfortable, he would grab my legs with his hands to stop me from moving so much.
the most recent thing he did was a couple days ago, when I was sitting up against his headboard. he climbed onto the bed without saying a word, grabbed a pillow, put it against my legs and leaned back on it, essentially using me as a chair of sorts with the pillow as a barrier between us. after about five minutes of this, he complained that his neck was tired and rested it back on my collarbone (? english isn't my first language, so bear with me) as he continued to scroll through his phone. occasionally he'd turn back his head to look at me and show me something, and his face would be so close with his hair tickling my neck, which would make me panic internally of sorts.
he's also said a couple times about how I need a boyfriend to keep me warm (as I get cold easily), his preferences and types (although it never goes anything above PG) and teases me for being "innocent" due to being inexperienced when it comes to dating and relationships. we also tend to tease each other a lot, and he has no problem in taking off his shirt and changing in front of me, often bragging to me about how he has "abs".
there's also been a few instances where we've been with friends and i've gotten intoxicated and he's let me use him as a pillow of sorts. apparently every time I would wake up, he would pat my hair and shush me to go back to sleep and would pretty much take care of me for most of the night until it was time for me to head home.
we tend to also message each other very often throughout the day, and call for hours on end several times a week. I know a lot about him, such as his past relationships and how he would never make the first move when it comes to a girl, as he is afraid of being accused of something he didn't do later on. he also calls me his closest and most favourite friend, which makes me think he only does just see me as one, but he also doesn't do this with our other female friends. he also often says how he wants a girlfriend, but also just wants to work on himself.
i cannot tell if this is normal behaviour between male and female friends, and want to know what others may think.
again, apologies if there are some things that don't make sense, as english isn't my first language, and if there was too much information. it's just that since my friend has suggested he could see me as something more, it's been on my mind a lot and has me analysing every interaction between us. this is also my first time posting on reddit, so again, apologies if this post is a little messy.
TLDR: friend thinks my male friend might think of me as more than just a friend due to things he does.
also posted on relationship_advice, but wanted to also post here in hopes to get more opinions
submitted by ThrowRA_kisuhari to relationships [link] [comments]
i was telling her about the dynamic between K and i, to which she said it sounds like K might like me as more than a friend, and was curious as to what others thought.
for added context, I have a closer friendship with K due to being more free to hang out and willing to spend time with him more than D. K is from Norway and will be leaving the country I live in in early July of this year to return back home.
now here are the things that made her think that he might think of me as more than a friend.
for starters, he often lets me stay over at his place to sleep during the day if I get exhausted after work, as his residence is closer to my workplace than mine is. I'll go over there and sleep for a couple hours, then wake up and chill for a few more before going home.
this is where the "more than friends" things begin to come into play. he will ask me to wrestle with him (which I have a couple times and lost incredibly quickly due to our size difference, with him being 6'1 and I being 5'3) or he'll pick me up throw me around, often onto his bed while teasing me to eat more because I'm supposedly "light" in weight. whenever we do "fight" he likes to pin my legs and knees and tease me about how i won't be able to escape.
if I'm lying down on my stomach or back on his bed, he will occasionally just come over and collapse on top of me, explaining how he's bored and wants to be entertained. when I complain he's like a heavy weighted blanket, he'll laugh and tell me to deal with it as he scrolls on his phone, and we'll stay like like for like a half hour or so. whenever I tried to move to make myself more comfortable, he would grab my legs with his hands to stop me from moving so much.
the most recent thing he did was a couple days ago, when I was sitting up against his headboard. he climbed onto the bed without saying a word, grabbed a pillow, put it against my legs and leaned back on it, essentially using me as a chair of sorts with the pillow as a barrier between us. after about five minutes of this, he complained that his neck was tired and rested it back on my collarbone (? english isn't my first language, so bear with me) as he continued to scroll through his phone. occasionally he'd turn back his head to look at me and show me something, and his face would be so close with his hair tickling my neck, which would make me panic internally of sorts.
he's also said a couple times about how I need a boyfriend to keep me warm (as I get cold easily), his preferences and types (although it never goes anything above PG) and teases me for being "innocent" due to being inexperienced when it comes to dating and relationships. we also tend to tease each other a lot, and he has no problem in taking off his shirt and changing in front of me, often bragging to me about how he has "abs".
there's also been a few instances where we've been with friends and i've gotten intoxicated and he's let me use him as a pillow of sorts. apparently every time I would wake up, he would pat my hair and shush me to go back to sleep and would pretty much take care of me for most of the night until it was time for me to head home.
we tend to also message each other very often throughout the day, and call for hours on end several times a week. I know a lot about him, such as his past relationships and how he would never make the first move when it comes to a girl, as he is afraid of being accused of something he didn't do later on. he also calls me his closest and most favourite friend, which makes me think he only does just see me as one, but he also doesn't do this with our other female friends. he also often says how he wants a girlfriend, but also just wants to work on himself.
i cannot tell if this is normal behaviour between male and female friends, and want to know what others may think.
again, apologies if there are some things that don't make sense, as english isn't my first language, and if there was too much information. it's just that since my friend has suggested he could see me as something more, it's been on my mind a lot and has me analysing every interaction between us. this is also my first time posting on reddit, so again, apologies if this post is a little messy.
TLDR: friend thinks my male friend might think of me as more than just a friend due to things he does.
also posted on relationship_advice, but wanted to also post here in hopes to get more opinions
2023.06.08 10:36 No_EvidenceOfCrimes My story of addiction from age 7 to 18 (long and advice part marked)
Idek where to start this since it's mostly out of the blue for me, but my one hope is some of my experience may be able to help someone else suffering the same way I am.
So from the beginning, 7 year old me was in the living room with my parents and a sex scene in the movie they where watching came on and I didn't even know what sex was or what a naked woman looked like so that was the first time in my life that I ever saw someone else naked and that basically a butterfly that started a hurricane.
7yr self curious as ever stumbled over to the little laptop I got for Christmas and roughly typed in naked girl or smth like that, it was like 11 years ago. But I remember the first image of porn I ever saw and I was weirded out but couldn't stop looking, It felt like a urge came over me. From age 7-9 I didn't touch myself but I watched porn maybe 2 times a week as my addiction grew.
I think at around age 10 or 10 and a half is when I actually started jerking off and I was instantly hooked from the small dopamine spikes and promptly went on the same process 2-4 times a week for about 3 years and over those 3 years my life was basically in ruins. I gained a lot of weight, everything I did felt boring, I was severely demotivated to the point even getting out of bed didn't seem worth it, it was nearly impossible to make me happy and I had depression by the age of 12 and had random times where I would just breakdown and cry and small things would almost always lead to a mental breakdown, I was clinically online cause nothing really made me happy so I thought watching other people be happy would make me happy (it didn't).
Of course I had several times where I quit but I always ended up relapsing 10x worse and going like 2 times 7 days a week. Which was really unhealthy not just for my mental health but for my physical health I felt weak and just felt like I was on autopilot most of the time.
At around age 14-17 puberty didn't make it any easier but it was also the time I got into my religion and masturbation was a sin and all that so I felt even more guilty but this was the time where I tried to step up and knew I needed to do something and I'm currently in that process right now of quitting. Now for the advice.
submitted by No_EvidenceOfCrimes to PornAddiction [link] [comments]
So from the beginning, 7 year old me was in the living room with my parents and a sex scene in the movie they where watching came on and I didn't even know what sex was or what a naked woman looked like so that was the first time in my life that I ever saw someone else naked and that basically a butterfly that started a hurricane.
7yr self curious as ever stumbled over to the little laptop I got for Christmas and roughly typed in naked girl or smth like that, it was like 11 years ago. But I remember the first image of porn I ever saw and I was weirded out but couldn't stop looking, It felt like a urge came over me. From age 7-9 I didn't touch myself but I watched porn maybe 2 times a week as my addiction grew.
I think at around age 10 or 10 and a half is when I actually started jerking off and I was instantly hooked from the small dopamine spikes and promptly went on the same process 2-4 times a week for about 3 years and over those 3 years my life was basically in ruins. I gained a lot of weight, everything I did felt boring, I was severely demotivated to the point even getting out of bed didn't seem worth it, it was nearly impossible to make me happy and I had depression by the age of 12 and had random times where I would just breakdown and cry and small things would almost always lead to a mental breakdown, I was clinically online cause nothing really made me happy so I thought watching other people be happy would make me happy (it didn't).
Of course I had several times where I quit but I always ended up relapsing 10x worse and going like 2 times 7 days a week. Which was really unhealthy not just for my mental health but for my physical health I felt weak and just felt like I was on autopilot most of the time.
At around age 14-17 puberty didn't make it any easier but it was also the time I got into my religion and masturbation was a sin and all that so I felt even more guilty but this was the time where I tried to step up and knew I needed to do something and I'm currently in that process right now of quitting. Now for the advice.
ADVICE ADVICE ADVICE ADVICE ADVICE1.Get the device or whatever you watch porn on and put it as far away as possible. No this doesn't mean like out of your house or smth but like on the other side of the house.
- Whenever you feel an urge, practice or do something productive even if it's night get up and just stand or do jumping jacks for a little or you could even watch a movie.
- Therapy, I know people don't wanna hear it but this is one of the best methods is for professional help. Personally I had to get through myself cause therapy was expensive and my therapist wasn't good.
- Wear headphones or play something loudly like music or even rain/white noise I prefer headphones personally but the reason for this is it makes my mind go blank cause I'm focusing on the noise and can't concentrate on thought.
- Don't go looking for serious things on here unless its for advice or your trying to learn from someone else. This is mostly optional but the reason for this is all these serious things can bum a person out sometimes it's nice to just look at some anti porn memes to give you some encouragement to keep going.
2023.06.08 10:36 OneAd2821 I don’t know if I was sexually abused as a child..
I keep thinking over and over to myself that something must have happened when I was a kid. It’s almost like there has been a void that blocked out any memories of sexual abuse. But it’s like deep down I know things have happened to me as a child/infant, I just don’t know/can’t remember what it was..I grew up in a suburban neighborhood with a relatively good family and I do have some questionable situations that I can think of but nothing obvious.. something tells me it happened when I was really young in the 2-4 years old category. Since when I was 5-6 years old I would have friends that were girls (the same age) in our neighborhood and I tried to express my sexuality very early on with them, in ways that I didn’t even know I knew about. And it’s like I knew what to do without even thinking about it as such a young kid. Which makes me think I could very well have been abused. As well as drug addiction/alcohol usage very early on around 11-12 I also have been diagnosed with depression and anxiety disorder which I can remember feeling as little as 5 yo when I asked my parents what that feeling was that I was experiencing. I’m putting this out there because I truly can’t remember anymore now that I’m much older if I was abused or not as a kid and was hoping maybe some people might be able to share some knowledge.
submitted by OneAd2821 to adultsurvivors [link] [comments]
2023.06.08 10:35 Theyluvsags I hate trios
This is a little vent because I always feel left out in my trio. I hate trios or groups because every time no matter how much people there are I’m left out, I’m in a trio now and they don’t include me . They post each other call each other sweet names and keep texting in the group chat, I’m sorta just there. They even have matching profiles on TikTok which might not be as dramatic as u think but we had a trio pfp and then they changed it to a duo pfp. Ik im Making a big deal out of it but I mean come on, they post each other to and they barley post me, I knew my bestie first and we haven’t been talking at the time but then we started to talk again and then she introduced me to her new best friend I was like oh no not this again bc I knew we were gonna be a group and I was gonna get left out as usually. And I do get left out I just want to know what’s wrong with me, why can’t I be a duo in a trio not even that why can’t we just all hangout and be friends. But no she chooses me her long time bestie (me) over her new one. I feel broken and replaced I try to find new friends but I can’t really talk to people. I hate the new girl actually I liked her at first but now I hate her. Can’t believe I got replaced she said we would never grow apart, that’s a lie. The thing here is DONT be in a trio or friend group. I’m warning you.
submitted by Theyluvsags to leftoverspodcast [link] [comments]
2023.06.08 10:35 imafraidofgrass How do I (24M) get into a relationship?
I'm actually confused. All my (24M) friends (25M/24M/22F/27F/25M, the list goes on) are currently dating someone, and whenever I ask them how they did it, they just tell me that my time will come. Yet they never have a girl they could maybe introduce me to. May I say how frustrating this is?
I have never been in a relationship before, and I would like to change that. I don't think I'm objectifying women when I say I want to be in a relationship. This is just something I would like to experience with another human being. Am I wrong to think of it this way? If other people do it, why can't I do it to? I have tried many pieces of advice before and it seems that I'm not making any progress.
I was depressed through college but I got out of it once I finished it, and with the help of therapy. I just wish I had been stronger during that time, and maybe who knows, I could have met someone my age? Now that I am working it just became harder. People on my team at work are all at least 10 years older than me. I feel hopeless.
Advice I took have been things like starting to go to the gym, taking better care of myself, getting a hobby that involves people, no matter how nerdy it is as long as I enjoy it (and I do enjoy it! and yes, it is nerdy!), go to meetups with strangers, dating apps, take the dog for walks where there will be people nearby, be kind and open to strangers, etc. Now I am not undermining what I have done so far. I think it has made me a better and well-rounded person overall. But this is still not leading me anywhere, and all around me I see people, including my friends, who did not need to do half of these things in order to start a relationship with someone.
Whenever I try to express how frustrating this is, the answers I get vary from "Oh, but being single is great!", "Just continue to improve yourself.", "Stop looking for it and you will find it.", "Just get physical and see where things go from there." (This one makes me uncomfortable, as I never even had a first kiss and would like it to be with a girl I liked.) I'm not saying these are bad advice, but they do a really poor job at recognizing my loneliness. I have never been a person who feels lonely, but as I get older this is something that is starting to get to me. All I can think is that something inside me is broken or just wrong in some way. I'm not an ugly guy. I consider myself quite handsome, actually. A little shy and quiet than most people, sure, but I don't let that be perceived as a flaw.
I guess what I'm looking for as I write this is both advice and recognition of how shitty this feels. Sometimes it feels like people who are in relationships get detached from how hard this can be. I know being single is better than being in a bad relationship, but I am doing my damn best to find a good one.
It is not working though...
tl;dr: I (24M) can't seem to find a relationship no matter what I do. I'm starting to feel hopeless as all my friends get into relationships and tell me my time will eventually come. This is starting to become very frustrating and lonely. Some advice and empathy is appreciated. Thank you!
submitted by imafraidofgrass to relationships [link] [comments]
I have never been in a relationship before, and I would like to change that. I don't think I'm objectifying women when I say I want to be in a relationship. This is just something I would like to experience with another human being. Am I wrong to think of it this way? If other people do it, why can't I do it to? I have tried many pieces of advice before and it seems that I'm not making any progress.
I was depressed through college but I got out of it once I finished it, and with the help of therapy. I just wish I had been stronger during that time, and maybe who knows, I could have met someone my age? Now that I am working it just became harder. People on my team at work are all at least 10 years older than me. I feel hopeless.
Advice I took have been things like starting to go to the gym, taking better care of myself, getting a hobby that involves people, no matter how nerdy it is as long as I enjoy it (and I do enjoy it! and yes, it is nerdy!), go to meetups with strangers, dating apps, take the dog for walks where there will be people nearby, be kind and open to strangers, etc. Now I am not undermining what I have done so far. I think it has made me a better and well-rounded person overall. But this is still not leading me anywhere, and all around me I see people, including my friends, who did not need to do half of these things in order to start a relationship with someone.
Whenever I try to express how frustrating this is, the answers I get vary from "Oh, but being single is great!", "Just continue to improve yourself.", "Stop looking for it and you will find it.", "Just get physical and see where things go from there." (This one makes me uncomfortable, as I never even had a first kiss and would like it to be with a girl I liked.) I'm not saying these are bad advice, but they do a really poor job at recognizing my loneliness. I have never been a person who feels lonely, but as I get older this is something that is starting to get to me. All I can think is that something inside me is broken or just wrong in some way. I'm not an ugly guy. I consider myself quite handsome, actually. A little shy and quiet than most people, sure, but I don't let that be perceived as a flaw.
I guess what I'm looking for as I write this is both advice and recognition of how shitty this feels. Sometimes it feels like people who are in relationships get detached from how hard this can be. I know being single is better than being in a bad relationship, but I am doing my damn best to find a good one.
It is not working though...
tl;dr: I (24M) can't seem to find a relationship no matter what I do. I'm starting to feel hopeless as all my friends get into relationships and tell me my time will eventually come. This is starting to become very frustrating and lonely. Some advice and empathy is appreciated. Thank you!
2023.06.08 10:34 SavingsAnnual3678 I need help getting out of this...
Hello,
Its a long text of wall, I am sorry for this, but somehow,
I am ashamed of my situation, that I let myself in like this. I want to be as honest as I can, and hopefully someone will understand my struggle and my situation, because I feel pretty alone,unloved and left alone to rott somehow...
I have this relationship with a girl from abroad for now almost a year, she is from indonesia, we met through dating website, and pretty fast she confessed her love to me, which overwhelmed me, and i felt very uncomfortable, but she was the first girl that was flirty with me, that gave me the feeling she wants me and not only for the reason i am a foreigner.. Not only that, but also she was so increadibly beautifull, no joke. My eyes got attached to her, and we startet chatting... the first red flag, i ignored, because from my last toxic relationship, i have learned about myself that i can be a catalyst, and i am aware of my short moodswings(i have ADHD, and struggled with that not being aware of myself), so I kinda thought, okay maybe i was just not very kind or something?
The situation was, after 3-4 days of talking to her daily, i was mentioning her thati am not her boyfriend yet, i dont know exact reason why i have said that, but her mood switched instantly, and she was cold, not talking anymore and visibly upset... The next day i wanted to discuss this, and kinda yea blamed myself for her reaction and asked her to be my girlfriend, which she agreed too. At this point I already heard from her, she never had a boyfriend or relationship before..(She was 25 at this point) Which is not a rare statement...
More and more situations like these happened, her temper, I always blamed myself, took the stress, but never yelled or snapped, tried calling her trying to comfort her... at a point, stupid me... I asked just for "fun" if she want to have the number of my ex(I have also a daughter with her), which she said, yes. And i have told her, that this was just a joke"i could not shut my mouth, i regret that so much)... and i gave her the number, i warned her my ex is not an honest person and i am single for a reason..I told her not to contact her, which she stated, i will, but everything she tells me wont have an effect...
I havent had much contact with my ex, and since i was with my new girlfriend now, i wanted to be loyal as possible, since i had a daughter with my ex, it was kinda obvious at a certain point i had to talk with her(the kid lives with me). Fast forward, within a few weeks i got a unrest in my belly, and i kindly asked her to give me a whatsapp screenshot of her recent chats, i wanted to feel okay, i asked her about this because she suddenly wrote to me "dont chat any girls" and as far as i know, i did not... so why would she asked like that.. i said to her, you too, dont chat with boys. Aaaand she gave me the screenshot, bingo, she chattet with a man, flirty(he replied pretty dry), one sentence kinda hurt me the most, she wrote him after he asked, "what are you doing" she replied, "chatting with you 😊" ... she was chatting with me at the same time.
This was the first time, i lost hope with her, but unfortunatley, i was emotionally attached to her already, she told me "its just a friend" ob boy, i cant heat that nonsense... i was devastated, i did nothing, i was loyal, why could she do this to me? I yelled at her, lost my temper... the next day i told her how much i suffer from seeing this, she kinda turned it off, its just a friend, sorry... And i think, when she betray me why she not delete the chat before she sent me it? And i though, okay, calm down, maybe its really just like that.... Later (6 month) she revaled she startet chatting with him, because my ex told her i had a relationship with her and she thought i am unloyal to her.(which i was not at the time)
But the situation at this point, i lost trust in her, i could not trust her anymore, when she said to me over the peroid of 2-3 days "dont chat with other girls" i got so suspicious.... and now i saw this, it prooved what i was scared of, that i found someone again who is not loyal.
6 weeks into the relationship i decided to visit her in indonesia, i have never been there, until that moment we had almost fight on a daily base for small things, wrong questions or whatsoever... but i thought, when i see her, i will know what person she really is, maybe its justa huge missunderstanding .
So i arrived with my daughter at the airport, suprise, the girl is not there, she has a reason the next day she will have an exam(which is not a lie) and will be interviewed by some people and she needed to prepare for that. Atleast thats what she said. (Later she revealed, she did not want to pick me up at the airport, because her friends wanted to join and she felt jealous).. So i was there, alone in the hot sun of indonesia, felt lost and left alone, unworthy, and kinda realise what big mistake i do, someone who i thought loves me, left me alone in a country where i never been too, i contacted her, and ofcource i complained... she asked the hotel staff from the hotel to pick me up, which he did, so yea, i kinda felt atleast she cared, somehow.
the next day, i was in the hotel, i havent showered or eaten yet, only my daughter. She was pretty happy, she loves to jump on beds, so yea, i felt atleast a bit relief that this wasnt a total faulure yet to go there after such a short amount of time.
She said she will visit me after work, which is 16, with driving or traffic problems arround 18 then.. I havent talked to her, because i wanted to wait, guess who could not be reached for hours, at 18, she turned on her phone, said she is on the way, there was an accident on the road, and they will drive a detour... (Later she revealed, that she lied, the story about this isnt very compleeted, just recently she added more details, but yea)
Anyway she arrived at 21:00 on the hotel, and i was in a state between is she playing with me and excitement to see her. I knew she was lying, i had checking up google maps, no way the driving was arround 4-5 hours... So after our heartfull greeting, we where hugging and kissing but somehow these unrest within me, that she might not be serious, so i asked her, did you really drive 4-5 hours? She said yes, there was traffic accident... i knew she was lying, and i asked her, to be honest to me, which she said, she is honest. (At that time i took that very serious, because i dont want to hear any stories, which are false, i am pretty sensitive and could not trust her so easily after she not there at the airport and the previous situation with the chatting boy)
And i made my decision, i asked her to go away, i was just devastated that she lied to me, she startet crying and tried to call with her godmom, its already 3am, and i did not really realised about her situation, after i calmed down, i approached her and said sorry, and we went to bed(she stayed with me) We had no issue so far for the next 2-3 days. After 5 days(the peroid of the hotel booked) i needed to find a new hotel, we, before i went to indonesia agreed that i could stay with her, in her arpartment... Turns out, its not the case, so yea, i booked a hotel for me and her, which she visited me, its very close to her work, so everything was kinda fine, but we argued alot, almost everyday until this point...
And my behaviour was more and more like a brute, i was starting to yell at her when she really dared to pick up a fight again, i could not calm myself, her little things really hurt me, for instance, she asked me to kiss her for 10 minutes, which i refused, and i kissed her for 30 seconds, which was not what she wanted, and she went mad, pointed a google maps route on her phone without saying anything, packed her stuff let the phone on the bed so i can see it, and after she almost done packing, i asked her whast this about... Yup she was about to leave... Small things like this, elevated our sitation always, from small things like these we went up to risk everything, neither she or me wanted to budge and not try to calm down the other person, int he end it was me who calmed first and tried to make the situation less toxic.
Now to the initial situation almost 10 month later... I am sitting here writing this, my ex almost talked oto her and spread lies about me on a weekly base, she believe the most things, and this makes me so broken, i have suicidal thoughts, i hurt myself pretty bad, i have scard on my body(which i never had before!) and she uses everything against me what she can in a "fight" she never approaches ne, never feels guilty, never see's her attiture and her cold behaviour, at this point she knows already i am the weak one here in this relationship, i am the one who will always come back, regardless what she does, at this point she states almost everymonth she want to chat with somerone else(turned out she did that a few times) and also mentioned at some point she wanted to have intercourse with another man.
Besides my mistakes, and yes i really did a few huge things, like i asked my ex, after the first time i saw her chat with another man, i got so sus, that i asked her to translate(my ex also from that country......but living here in my country) and she assure me "hey this girl is nice to you, you need to go with her, she is good for our daughter) so i felt comfortable getting informations and solutions about this what i do, yea she confirmed my relationship with my new girlfriend, and kinda felt supportive... I fell into a deep trap, behind my back she told my currentl girlfriend "he is horrible, dont be with him etc etc etc"
i havent clearly understood everything between those two, neither my ex or my current girlfriend are very open and only reveal a bit by a bit, ofcourse my current girlfriend is super jealous and angry... somehow i cant break this relation, i know myself, the red flags are everywhere, even on my side, i had done a huge mistake and other things which i havent mentioned... but until this day everything i do, she uses against me, a small word, and i end up crying in agony and pain. she hangs up the phone so easily, like i mean nothing to her when she is upset, she can throw me away like garbage when she is about to be angry...
i dont understand, when she states she loves me? how can she constantly disrespecting me and treating me like this.... I really need to get out of this, i dont know how, i am alone and isolated, i have a few friends which they clearly stated at some point, "you dont want to listen, please dont bother anymore with that"
the emotionally attachment makes me crazy, i dont want to feel, i want to be cold and careless, i want to have my peace, how??
submitted by SavingsAnnual3678 to ToxicRelationships [link] [comments]
Its a long text of wall, I am sorry for this, but somehow,
I am ashamed of my situation, that I let myself in like this. I want to be as honest as I can, and hopefully someone will understand my struggle and my situation, because I feel pretty alone,unloved and left alone to rott somehow...
I have this relationship with a girl from abroad for now almost a year, she is from indonesia, we met through dating website, and pretty fast she confessed her love to me, which overwhelmed me, and i felt very uncomfortable, but she was the first girl that was flirty with me, that gave me the feeling she wants me and not only for the reason i am a foreigner.. Not only that, but also she was so increadibly beautifull, no joke. My eyes got attached to her, and we startet chatting... the first red flag, i ignored, because from my last toxic relationship, i have learned about myself that i can be a catalyst, and i am aware of my short moodswings(i have ADHD, and struggled with that not being aware of myself), so I kinda thought, okay maybe i was just not very kind or something?
The situation was, after 3-4 days of talking to her daily, i was mentioning her thati am not her boyfriend yet, i dont know exact reason why i have said that, but her mood switched instantly, and she was cold, not talking anymore and visibly upset... The next day i wanted to discuss this, and kinda yea blamed myself for her reaction and asked her to be my girlfriend, which she agreed too. At this point I already heard from her, she never had a boyfriend or relationship before..(She was 25 at this point) Which is not a rare statement...
More and more situations like these happened, her temper, I always blamed myself, took the stress, but never yelled or snapped, tried calling her trying to comfort her... at a point, stupid me... I asked just for "fun" if she want to have the number of my ex(I have also a daughter with her), which she said, yes. And i have told her, that this was just a joke"i could not shut my mouth, i regret that so much)... and i gave her the number, i warned her my ex is not an honest person and i am single for a reason..I told her not to contact her, which she stated, i will, but everything she tells me wont have an effect...
I havent had much contact with my ex, and since i was with my new girlfriend now, i wanted to be loyal as possible, since i had a daughter with my ex, it was kinda obvious at a certain point i had to talk with her(the kid lives with me). Fast forward, within a few weeks i got a unrest in my belly, and i kindly asked her to give me a whatsapp screenshot of her recent chats, i wanted to feel okay, i asked her about this because she suddenly wrote to me "dont chat any girls" and as far as i know, i did not... so why would she asked like that.. i said to her, you too, dont chat with boys. Aaaand she gave me the screenshot, bingo, she chattet with a man, flirty(he replied pretty dry), one sentence kinda hurt me the most, she wrote him after he asked, "what are you doing" she replied, "chatting with you 😊" ... she was chatting with me at the same time.
This was the first time, i lost hope with her, but unfortunatley, i was emotionally attached to her already, she told me "its just a friend" ob boy, i cant heat that nonsense... i was devastated, i did nothing, i was loyal, why could she do this to me? I yelled at her, lost my temper... the next day i told her how much i suffer from seeing this, she kinda turned it off, its just a friend, sorry... And i think, when she betray me why she not delete the chat before she sent me it? And i though, okay, calm down, maybe its really just like that.... Later (6 month) she revaled she startet chatting with him, because my ex told her i had a relationship with her and she thought i am unloyal to her.(which i was not at the time)
But the situation at this point, i lost trust in her, i could not trust her anymore, when she said to me over the peroid of 2-3 days "dont chat with other girls" i got so suspicious.... and now i saw this, it prooved what i was scared of, that i found someone again who is not loyal.
6 weeks into the relationship i decided to visit her in indonesia, i have never been there, until that moment we had almost fight on a daily base for small things, wrong questions or whatsoever... but i thought, when i see her, i will know what person she really is, maybe its justa huge missunderstanding .
So i arrived with my daughter at the airport, suprise, the girl is not there, she has a reason the next day she will have an exam(which is not a lie) and will be interviewed by some people and she needed to prepare for that. Atleast thats what she said. (Later she revealed, she did not want to pick me up at the airport, because her friends wanted to join and she felt jealous).. So i was there, alone in the hot sun of indonesia, felt lost and left alone, unworthy, and kinda realise what big mistake i do, someone who i thought loves me, left me alone in a country where i never been too, i contacted her, and ofcource i complained... she asked the hotel staff from the hotel to pick me up, which he did, so yea, i kinda felt atleast she cared, somehow.
the next day, i was in the hotel, i havent showered or eaten yet, only my daughter. She was pretty happy, she loves to jump on beds, so yea, i felt atleast a bit relief that this wasnt a total faulure yet to go there after such a short amount of time.
She said she will visit me after work, which is 16, with driving or traffic problems arround 18 then.. I havent talked to her, because i wanted to wait, guess who could not be reached for hours, at 18, she turned on her phone, said she is on the way, there was an accident on the road, and they will drive a detour... (Later she revealed, that she lied, the story about this isnt very compleeted, just recently she added more details, but yea)
Anyway she arrived at 21:00 on the hotel, and i was in a state between is she playing with me and excitement to see her. I knew she was lying, i had checking up google maps, no way the driving was arround 4-5 hours... So after our heartfull greeting, we where hugging and kissing but somehow these unrest within me, that she might not be serious, so i asked her, did you really drive 4-5 hours? She said yes, there was traffic accident... i knew she was lying, and i asked her, to be honest to me, which she said, she is honest. (At that time i took that very serious, because i dont want to hear any stories, which are false, i am pretty sensitive and could not trust her so easily after she not there at the airport and the previous situation with the chatting boy)
And i made my decision, i asked her to go away, i was just devastated that she lied to me, she startet crying and tried to call with her godmom, its already 3am, and i did not really realised about her situation, after i calmed down, i approached her and said sorry, and we went to bed(she stayed with me) We had no issue so far for the next 2-3 days. After 5 days(the peroid of the hotel booked) i needed to find a new hotel, we, before i went to indonesia agreed that i could stay with her, in her arpartment... Turns out, its not the case, so yea, i booked a hotel for me and her, which she visited me, its very close to her work, so everything was kinda fine, but we argued alot, almost everyday until this point...
And my behaviour was more and more like a brute, i was starting to yell at her when she really dared to pick up a fight again, i could not calm myself, her little things really hurt me, for instance, she asked me to kiss her for 10 minutes, which i refused, and i kissed her for 30 seconds, which was not what she wanted, and she went mad, pointed a google maps route on her phone without saying anything, packed her stuff let the phone on the bed so i can see it, and after she almost done packing, i asked her whast this about... Yup she was about to leave... Small things like this, elevated our sitation always, from small things like these we went up to risk everything, neither she or me wanted to budge and not try to calm down the other person, int he end it was me who calmed first and tried to make the situation less toxic.
Now to the initial situation almost 10 month later... I am sitting here writing this, my ex almost talked oto her and spread lies about me on a weekly base, she believe the most things, and this makes me so broken, i have suicidal thoughts, i hurt myself pretty bad, i have scard on my body(which i never had before!) and she uses everything against me what she can in a "fight" she never approaches ne, never feels guilty, never see's her attiture and her cold behaviour, at this point she knows already i am the weak one here in this relationship, i am the one who will always come back, regardless what she does, at this point she states almost everymonth she want to chat with somerone else(turned out she did that a few times) and also mentioned at some point she wanted to have intercourse with another man.
Besides my mistakes, and yes i really did a few huge things, like i asked my ex, after the first time i saw her chat with another man, i got so sus, that i asked her to translate(my ex also from that country......but living here in my country) and she assure me "hey this girl is nice to you, you need to go with her, she is good for our daughter) so i felt comfortable getting informations and solutions about this what i do, yea she confirmed my relationship with my new girlfriend, and kinda felt supportive... I fell into a deep trap, behind my back she told my currentl girlfriend "he is horrible, dont be with him etc etc etc"
i havent clearly understood everything between those two, neither my ex or my current girlfriend are very open and only reveal a bit by a bit, ofcourse my current girlfriend is super jealous and angry... somehow i cant break this relation, i know myself, the red flags are everywhere, even on my side, i had done a huge mistake and other things which i havent mentioned... but until this day everything i do, she uses against me, a small word, and i end up crying in agony and pain. she hangs up the phone so easily, like i mean nothing to her when she is upset, she can throw me away like garbage when she is about to be angry...
i dont understand, when she states she loves me? how can she constantly disrespecting me and treating me like this.... I really need to get out of this, i dont know how, i am alone and isolated, i have a few friends which they clearly stated at some point, "you dont want to listen, please dont bother anymore with that"
the emotionally attachment makes me crazy, i dont want to feel, i want to be cold and careless, i want to have my peace, how??
2023.06.08 10:34 ThrowRA_kisuhari i (21f) am not sure if my friend's (m22) behaviour is "just friendly" anymore after talking to a close friend
i (21f) was recently having a conversation with a friend D (also 21f) about our mutual friend K (22m), who we have known for several months now.
i was telling her about the dynamic between K and i, to which she said it sounds like K might like me as more than a friend, and was curious as to what others thought.
for added context, I have a closer friendship with K due to being more free to hang out and willing to spend time with him more than D. K is from Norway and will be leaving the country I live in in early July of this year to return back home.
now here are the things that made her think that he might think of me as more than a friend.
for starters, he often lets me stay over at his place to sleep during the day if I get exhausted after work, as his residence is closer to my workplace than mine is. I'll go over there and sleep for a couple hours, then wake up and chill for a few more before going home.
this is where the "more than friends" things begin to come into play. he will ask me to wrestle with him (which I have a couple times and lost incredibly quickly due to our size difference, with him being 6'1 and I being 5'3) or he'll pick me up throw me around, often onto his bed while teasing me to eat more because I'm supposedly "light" in weight. whenever we do "fight" he likes to pin my legs and knees and tease me about how i won't be able to escape.
if I'm lying down on my stomach or back on his bed, he will occasionally just come over and collapse on top of me, explaining how he's bored and wants to be entertained. when I complain he's like a heavy weighted blanket, he'll laugh and tell me to deal with it as he scrolls on his phone, and we'll stay like like for like a half hour or so. whenever I tried to move to make myself more comfortable, he would grab my legs with his hands to stop me from moving so much.
the most recent thing he did was a couple days ago, when I was sitting up against his headboard. he climbed onto the bed without saying a word, grabbed a pillow, put it against my legs and leaned back on it, essentially using me as a chair of sorts with the pillow as a barrier between us. after about five minutes of this, he complained that his neck was tired and rested it back on my collarbone (? english isn't my first language, so bear with me) as he continued to scroll through his phone. occasionally he'd turn back his head to look at me and show me something, and his face would be so close with his hair tickling my neck, which would make me panic internally of sorts.
he's also said a couple times about how I need a boyfriend to keep me warm (as I get cold easily), his preferences and types (although it never goes anything above PG) and teases me for being "innocent" due to being inexperienced when it comes to dating and relationships. we also tend to tease each other a lot, and he has no problem in taking off his shirt and changing in front of me, often bragging to me about how he has "abs".
there's also been a few instances where we've been with friends and i've gotten intoxicated and he's let me use him as a pillow of sorts. apparently every time I would wake up, he would pat my hair and shush me to go back to sleep and would pretty much take care of me for most of the night until it was time for me to head home.
we tend to also message each other very often throughout the day, and call for hours on end several times a week. I know a lot about him, such as his past relationships and how he would never make the first move when it comes to a girl, as he is afraid of being accused of something he didn't do later on. he also calls me his closest and most favourite friend, which makes me think he only does just see me as one, but he also doesn't do this with our other female friends. he also often says how he wants a girlfriend, but also just wants to work on himself.
i cannot tell if this is normal behaviour between male and female friends, and want to know what others may think.
again, apologies if there are some things that don't make sense, as english isn't my first language, and if there was too much information. it's just that since my friend has suggested he could see me as something more, it's been on my mind a lot and has me analysing every interaction between us. this is also my first time posting on reddit, so again, apologies if this post is a little messy.
TLDR: friend thinks my male friend might think of me as more than just a friend due to things he does.
submitted by ThrowRA_kisuhari to relationship_advice [link] [comments]
i was telling her about the dynamic between K and i, to which she said it sounds like K might like me as more than a friend, and was curious as to what others thought.
for added context, I have a closer friendship with K due to being more free to hang out and willing to spend time with him more than D. K is from Norway and will be leaving the country I live in in early July of this year to return back home.
now here are the things that made her think that he might think of me as more than a friend.
for starters, he often lets me stay over at his place to sleep during the day if I get exhausted after work, as his residence is closer to my workplace than mine is. I'll go over there and sleep for a couple hours, then wake up and chill for a few more before going home.
this is where the "more than friends" things begin to come into play. he will ask me to wrestle with him (which I have a couple times and lost incredibly quickly due to our size difference, with him being 6'1 and I being 5'3) or he'll pick me up throw me around, often onto his bed while teasing me to eat more because I'm supposedly "light" in weight. whenever we do "fight" he likes to pin my legs and knees and tease me about how i won't be able to escape.
if I'm lying down on my stomach or back on his bed, he will occasionally just come over and collapse on top of me, explaining how he's bored and wants to be entertained. when I complain he's like a heavy weighted blanket, he'll laugh and tell me to deal with it as he scrolls on his phone, and we'll stay like like for like a half hour or so. whenever I tried to move to make myself more comfortable, he would grab my legs with his hands to stop me from moving so much.
the most recent thing he did was a couple days ago, when I was sitting up against his headboard. he climbed onto the bed without saying a word, grabbed a pillow, put it against my legs and leaned back on it, essentially using me as a chair of sorts with the pillow as a barrier between us. after about five minutes of this, he complained that his neck was tired and rested it back on my collarbone (? english isn't my first language, so bear with me) as he continued to scroll through his phone. occasionally he'd turn back his head to look at me and show me something, and his face would be so close with his hair tickling my neck, which would make me panic internally of sorts.
he's also said a couple times about how I need a boyfriend to keep me warm (as I get cold easily), his preferences and types (although it never goes anything above PG) and teases me for being "innocent" due to being inexperienced when it comes to dating and relationships. we also tend to tease each other a lot, and he has no problem in taking off his shirt and changing in front of me, often bragging to me about how he has "abs".
there's also been a few instances where we've been with friends and i've gotten intoxicated and he's let me use him as a pillow of sorts. apparently every time I would wake up, he would pat my hair and shush me to go back to sleep and would pretty much take care of me for most of the night until it was time for me to head home.
we tend to also message each other very often throughout the day, and call for hours on end several times a week. I know a lot about him, such as his past relationships and how he would never make the first move when it comes to a girl, as he is afraid of being accused of something he didn't do later on. he also calls me his closest and most favourite friend, which makes me think he only does just see me as one, but he also doesn't do this with our other female friends. he also often says how he wants a girlfriend, but also just wants to work on himself.
i cannot tell if this is normal behaviour between male and female friends, and want to know what others may think.
again, apologies if there are some things that don't make sense, as english isn't my first language, and if there was too much information. it's just that since my friend has suggested he could see me as something more, it's been on my mind a lot and has me analysing every interaction between us. this is also my first time posting on reddit, so again, apologies if this post is a little messy.
TLDR: friend thinks my male friend might think of me as more than just a friend due to things he does.
2023.06.08 10:33 bluewing49 I have heard some people say that women are not well represented in the Arkham games? I think are very well represented.
 | Firstly, some people are concerned with female characters being captured and requiring batman to save them, this has gone to the point where they don't like the fact that Oracle had to be saved by batman when falling of the building. Even though catwoman got captured twice(asylum and knight), it was her who helped batman from literally dying both times, he wouldn't survive fighting those riddler bots alone. Poison ivy is the sole reason why gotham was saved in knight, just shows how powerful she is. Harley led a group of thugs and even beat nightwing. Without oracle,batman just wouldn't be able to do certain things, this is heavily showcased in knight, despite of being disabled, oracle stood up to scarecrow. Plus male characters too like gordon(thrice), nightwing and robin got captured. Just because they are captured doesn't mean they are weak. Plus all the female characters are well characterized in their own DLCs. submitted by bluewing49 to BatmanArkham [link] [comments] As per sexualising goes, knight is toned down quite a lot, so out of question. Poison ivy is only sexualised from the waist down. From the waist up she just has stomach showing that's 98% of women's dresses nowdays. Catwoman only has a little cleavage showing, again that's fine. From common people to celebrities, so many people wear such clothes. Even school girls war such outfits during prom etc. Just like men women also sexualise the opposite gender. Nightwing's ass. People are being wayyy too sensitive imo. They are calling rocksteady heinous monsters. What do you guys think??? |
2023.06.08 10:32 Agreeable-Web-8401 Need Help Finding A Sketch
Okay so, I remember watching this one where this little girl got a bear from her dad and it went rouge then killed them all and I can't seem to find it anywhere on the internet so far. I'm kinda starting to question whether it existed at all, but I'm quite sure it did because I remember watching it multiple times and it use to scare the shit out of my younger brother.
submitted by Agreeable-Web-8401 to robotchicken [link] [comments]
2023.06.08 10:30 CindyMJDF How to Succeed In SSBBW Dating Sites?
 | submitted by CindyMJDF to BBWSingles [link] [comments] https://preview.redd.it/kz2fc8609r4b1.jpg?width=900&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6dbc733951996c869da383529e5a75bd9e3aeed7 The term SSBBW is short for for "super sized big beautiful women". There are on SSBBW dating sites certainly a few methods which when followed could guarantee achievement meeting people. One of many things it's possible to do will be to look for a quality site they are able to use. Paid dating internet services are inclined to give effective and more efficient services. The concept is to look for a dating website that provides only serious people. On BBW, the area they'd be best offered is for big beautiful ladies as well as their lovers dating sites. BBW is just the shorter (but more widely known) composition of the exact same market. It is advisable for to see essential dating security precautions while searching for prospective friends and associates online. This consists of supplying just enough useful information to permit other customers learn more about you , while remaining anonymous. One of the info you must leave out wherever you frequent or enjoy going out and is about where you operate, details, in your geographical area. This is especially tricky should you live or work in a little community when you could inadvertently hand out your work data by simply telling someone you distinct work. How? You notice, there may be only 1 such organization in your area should you say work with a large insurance provider for example. One would not want to become an Einstein to find out which firm you benefit in that case. it isn't impossible, although it may consider some work to track you down utilizing your online dating profile photo. To enhance chances of meeting with more people online, it is advisable to really have a positive attitude. Here is the advantage of SSBBW. You will be comfortable in the understanding that folks on the SSBBW dating are possibly lovers of large girls or big women themselves. Thus, be comfortable: while they want you. Do list fun and characteristics that are intriguing about oneself within your personal page. It is important to provide information about talents interests and interests too. This type of data allows someone to present details what they consider exciting and fascinating and about what they like about themselves. You must usually post a great image of yourself. Since it assists other users to find more about you out this is helpful. And, better yet for your ladies, they will see that you're a real SSBBW. Guys that use these sites are not necessarily huge, but looking for big girls. You need to avoid publishing images that are unkempt. It's advisable to organize for the picture. This is often performed by making sure that makeup, experience and the hair is in condition. Grinning while in the photo makes one look easygoing, comfortable and desirable. You ought to make an effort to understand how to communicate online. It is great to send flirts fascinating records and emails to people you are involved in. this enables additional online daters to become enthusiastic about answering the connection. Online daters also needs to make an effort of giving fun, responsive and fascinating comments back to consumers who are enthusiastic about them. Being respectful while dating online is also important. Make sure to let somebody down quickly if you're not interested in them. It allows one to protect their strength with other daters and within the unique dating website. It's advised that certain should avoid communicating lies while SSBBW dating. This will be achieved constantly. People should only offer honest information inside their internet dating page, including placing their new images that are true. Avoid showing white lies when dating online. Best SSBBW Dating site |
2023.06.08 10:30 AdviseThrowaway_ 20 Adopt a Aussie Introvert below
Hello there! Welcome to my post. Im Wink and am Looking to make long term friends who i can harass with cute photos when we are bored, kill time and potentially game, have each others backs to lean on/help out. So if your also seeking that and wana be numb little bugs together (bonus points if you get the reference) Looking forward to hearing from you.
Interest's Love animals and rowing which i want to get back into. HUGE marvel and star wars nerd. My special interest is ww1/ww2 history and tanks (can talk for hours about that). Studying cyber security so if you know about it that would be amazing!
🐈 Pets I have 2 cats and 1 tripod kitten now . Also 1 dog who i can spam you photos of. Once i get to know you i WILL be your wholesome pet supplier.
🎮 Games Primely games on pc tho down to try games if you give me suggestions. All top time game is Minecraft duh but closely followed by battlefield 1. Lastly the most important game is staring at my screen zoning out while harassing my pets. 10/10 would play again
🎬 Film & Media Favorite movie would be hacksaw ridge, Andor and Rouge One. For shows the bad batch and clone wars never gets old. Need a show to binge in the mean time so fire away suggestions please.
Anime Love girls und panzer aka Tanks doing unrealistic things. My top other favorite would be One piece and Fairy tail.
🎵 Music Now for music. My top Spotify genre was rock, video game and aussie rock again (strong bias towards Australians sorry not sorry). If you get this far dm the song you listened to last and ill rate it.
General info and ending Tend to be a positive person and want to brighten up peoples day. Bonus points if your aussie or aspie/tism. Discord is my go to so ill happily move there Lastly please tell me abit about your self and what made you smile today?!
Hopefully everyone is doing okay and best of luck with everything. Your amazing and you've got this!!🤍
submitted by AdviseThrowaway_ to MakeNewFriendsHere [link] [comments]
Interest's Love animals and rowing which i want to get back into. HUGE marvel and star wars nerd. My special interest is ww1/ww2 history and tanks (can talk for hours about that). Studying cyber security so if you know about it that would be amazing!
🐈 Pets I have 2 cats and 1 tripod kitten now . Also 1 dog who i can spam you photos of. Once i get to know you i WILL be your wholesome pet supplier.
🎮 Games Primely games on pc tho down to try games if you give me suggestions. All top time game is Minecraft duh but closely followed by battlefield 1. Lastly the most important game is staring at my screen zoning out while harassing my pets. 10/10 would play again
🎬 Film & Media Favorite movie would be hacksaw ridge, Andor and Rouge One. For shows the bad batch and clone wars never gets old. Need a show to binge in the mean time so fire away suggestions please.
Anime Love girls und panzer aka Tanks doing unrealistic things. My top other favorite would be One piece and Fairy tail.
🎵 Music Now for music. My top Spotify genre was rock, video game and aussie rock again (strong bias towards Australians sorry not sorry). If you get this far dm the song you listened to last and ill rate it.
General info and ending Tend to be a positive person and want to brighten up peoples day. Bonus points if your aussie or aspie/tism. Discord is my go to so ill happily move there Lastly please tell me abit about your self and what made you smile today?!
Hopefully everyone is doing okay and best of luck with everything. Your amazing and you've got this!!🤍
2023.06.08 10:28 UnfairBill7482 My dog asks for rubs but after a minute or two becomes reactive?
So my 2 year old golden is a very sweet girl. We had behaviour issues with her in the first 18 months but, as I suspected, she's mostly grown out of them.
But one thing she hasn't grown out of is becoming reactive when people rub her for too long.
For example, yesterday when we were out walking her, I sat on a bench and was rubbing her a little bit and stopped as I know how she is.
A stranger came towards us and she became very excited, jumping on her and presenting her bum for a rub. The lady asked could she rub her and I said yes just don't go near her face as she doesn't like it.
The lady was rubbing her for a couple of minutes, my dog lied down on her side and seemed very relaxed as the lady rubbed her belly, side, bum, everywhere but the head really.
After about 2 minutes of this, my dog showed her teeth, then barked and gave a warning snap at the lady?
Why does she do this? She asks for rubs and is very friendly initially with people and loves strangers, but after a couple of minutes she's like "OK I got my rubs now get away from me before you lose your fingers".
This isn't just strangers, we've learned not to rub her too long at home either for the same reason. We'll give her a few quick strokes and then stop so as to not over stimulate her.
Has anyone else experienced this or have advice?
submitted by UnfairBill7482 to reactivedogs [link] [comments]
But one thing she hasn't grown out of is becoming reactive when people rub her for too long.
For example, yesterday when we were out walking her, I sat on a bench and was rubbing her a little bit and stopped as I know how she is.
A stranger came towards us and she became very excited, jumping on her and presenting her bum for a rub. The lady asked could she rub her and I said yes just don't go near her face as she doesn't like it.
The lady was rubbing her for a couple of minutes, my dog lied down on her side and seemed very relaxed as the lady rubbed her belly, side, bum, everywhere but the head really.
After about 2 minutes of this, my dog showed her teeth, then barked and gave a warning snap at the lady?
Why does she do this? She asks for rubs and is very friendly initially with people and loves strangers, but after a couple of minutes she's like "OK I got my rubs now get away from me before you lose your fingers".
This isn't just strangers, we've learned not to rub her too long at home either for the same reason. We'll give her a few quick strokes and then stop so as to not over stimulate her.
Has anyone else experienced this or have advice?
2023.06.08 10:28 Icy_Coach6458 🔞OnlyFans MEGA 🥵️Leaks Pack 🌈IN COMMENTS💦 bsff