Low tide in twilight 37

So after work, a few of us went to the pub for drinks. Work has been so hard for months and we really needed to blow off some steam.
In the pub, there were kids there so we were trying our best not to swear but the more drunk we got the more that went out the window.
There was a woman with her husband and kid. It was about 8pm now and it was a Friday night in a pub. I was convinced she was giving me evils so I said that to my friend. This woman heard and said "I'm not giving you evils, I can hear you" really snappy and looking angry.
I reacted badly to this. I can't remember what I said and I don't think I was too bad but I ended with "You should go home, it's past your kids bed time" so i was a bit rude. Then me and my friend's carried on drinking and talking.
As this couple left, they made a point of coming over to the table and saying "well we are going now because its past our kids bedtime". He also said "and you lot are teachers? " really judgmental towards us. I ended up saying "you don't know anything about us" " you must be so unhappy to talk to us like that" and I did end with a f**k off.
I felt bad after and my friends were saying that they had a bad attitude and I was just reacting to that. Now I am sober, I just feel horrible. Its so out of character for me to argue with strangers and because its a bit hazy I just feel like im the worst person in the world. I don't even understand why I reacted like that. Normally I'm just silly and would say "sorry" When she overheard the giving us evils comment.
I get hangxiety after a Good night but this feels like a new low. Help 🥺

Hello,
I've got 70 sausages to cook tonight. Time will be scarce, I'm not a pro, I'm not well organized. Is it possible to precook them on a kamado, smoking them at low temp, then when the guess come just grill them ? I've read that people like poaching them in cold water until 150°F before grilling them, but I'd really like put some smoke flavor on these sausages...
Have a nice weekend !
F.

hey ya'll
What do you guys think the MAI HL grade boundaries will look like for the M23 Session? I know that in NOV22 they were super low with almost a 64% getting a 7 (the lowest out of all 4 math categories)
Do you guys think they will be similar this time, considering the fact that people probably score much lower on MAI HL tests comparatively, or am I just hoping for the best here

(DIVISION 2)
I didn't realize that every time the bar was resetting. I lost so much gear trying to fill the bars up but not realizing why they were not getting full. I feel pretty dumb but this seems like really poor design. It would be nice if that was laid out more clearly.
So for each attribute I was putting in a bunch of low level guns thinking eventually I would have the max of that attribute- NOPE. All those guns/pieces of gear... gone into the ether WTF
You are suppose to put the highest stat one into each and then load that into guns.
Not continue loading gear into oblivion. This is super frustrsting.

First I want to say, I haven't tested these yet gaming. I know, I know... It's technically a gaming headset. But I figure folks purchasing these are also very interested in using them for music as well as all the other aspects of the device. I will update this after gaming a bit more in the coming days.
Build quality: Solid. Much better than any headset I have ever had my hands on. In fact I'd say it's better than any headphones I've ever had as well. Very impressed. Ear pads are nice and thick but the material isn't as nice as other pleather materials and doesn't seem to breathe much.
Build Quality rating: 9/10
Comfort: Not great. The adjustment strap only has 3 settings and none of them work for me. There is no up/down adjustment on the head piece like most headphones and headsets have. I settled for using the middle setting on one side and the smallest on the other side. The smallest setting is way too tight on my head. the middle setting it feels like the headphones are sitting too low on my head with the tops of my ears touching the pads. Also, the headset is pretty heavy at around 500g. The pads are reasonably comfy and thick but they are made of pleather and get a little toasty. The clamping force depends on the strap setting and it apparent but not horrible. After a few hours this headset is way more comfortable than you'd expect after having read everything I just wrote. So while comfort isn't the best, it's not terrible either.
Comfort rating: 7/10
Features: Good but not the best. No ANC - that's fine, I don't need it. But competitors in this price range do have it. Sidetone works reasonably well and is an interesting addition. The built-in EQ settings are nice to have. The buttons and dials included on the headset are good - the dials have clicks and change in small increments. The buttons are solid. The Windows app is OK - pretty basic. Makes updating firmware super easy, has preset EQ. Would like to see something a bit more robust like SteelSeries Sonar though as I think this headset would benefit a LOT from parametric EQ tunes. Wireless works great and is very good quality.
Features rating: 8/10
Wireless: The wireless connection is solid but the range claim of "up to 3x traditional 2.4Ghz" is perhaps a little exaggerated. It cuts out in the same areas of my home that my 7 year old 2.4Ghz SteelSeries Siberia 800 does but it is still decent. The audio streaming quality is excellent as far as I can tell. no buzz, humm or background noise. The headset connects no problem to the USB dongle on both PS5 and PC. I have not noticed any significant audio lag which is a huge deal for me. Bluetooth to my phone and PC (not using dongle) is excellent as well.
Wireless rating: 9/10 Mic: Amazing for a headset. Noise suppression is good even without the active noise suppression turned on. Tested with a buddy that said I sound WAY better then with my old headset. Also ran a test and listened to myself. This is one the best built-in MIC's on a gaming headset I've ever hear. The mic is also detachable which is nice. Even the on-board mic's sound better than most gaming headsets I've heard.
Mic rating: 9.5/10
Audio: Excellent for a gaming headset. MUCH better than my old SteelSeries Siberia 800. I can tell immediately these are Planar Magnetic and not your run of the mill gaming headset drivers. However, I am comparing them directly to audiophile Planar Magnetic headphones that I have tuned with a parametric equalizer. So in that realm they are not nearly as impressive. For music I daily a pair of Sundara (2020 revision) running through JDS Atmos DAC+/Amp+. I'm using Equalizer APO with Oratory1990's Harman curve profile with some minor tweaks. That setup, IMO, is amazingly good with imaging and clarity in every genre from the bass all the way through to the treble. Amazing mid presence without being "warm". It's hard to explain but suffice it to say I can jack up the volume on virtually any kind of music and not get fatigued, but even at lower volumes the detail is still there. The Maxwell is a totally different story. There seems to be quite a V-shape built into the tuning. The mids are suppressed quite a bit. The bass and treble are decent but the highs are quite fatiguing. I am not a true audiophile so it's hard to explain, but when I put on my Sundara I just get so much detail from the whole range whereas with the Maxwell I lose a lot of detail and a little clarity. It's not that the bass is overpowering or muddy which is the case with my Siberia 800, it's just that it gets beat to shit by my Sundara setup. To be fair, the Maxwell may EQ well but I don't see how to do that outside the tools Audeze has included as it's all built into the headset itself. There is no fine tuning the EQ in their app that I can see, only presets. Each preset seems to be a tweak of the default "Audeze" setting rather than a whole different tune. So Bass boost brings out more bass without impacting the rest of the sound while Treble boost does the same.
Compared to my old gaming headset the audio quality is amazing. Compared to my music headphones the audio is just OK. So I think if you're coming from any mainstream "gaming headset" to this you will be impressed. If you're coming from something like the HD58x, especially if you have that thing dialed in, you may not be quite as impressed. Not that the Maxwell isn't putting oujt good sound because it is. I think it's just the way it's tuned. Clearly the drivers are good and capable of very high quality audio reproduction. Not really a fair comparison I'm making but if you are expecting this superb audiophile wireless Planar Magnetic headphone out of the box and already have a high quality setup you may be a little disappointed.
Imaging - good but not greatSoundstage - mehTreble - good but fatiguingMids - lackingBass - good but not greatClarity - good, great in some ways, lacking in others
Also want to note that the wireless audio sounds a bit different than USB. Not sure what it is but I think wireless using the dongle sounds better than direct USB connection.
Audio rating: 7.5/10 compared to my Sundara setup. 9/10 compared to other gaming headsets.
There you have it. My initial impressions. I'm going to go play some games now and see how it is. As a gaming headset alone I think the Maxwell is already a fantastic option even before I play any games with them. I also haven't tested the 3D audio stuff but I am in the camp that simulated surround sound is sort of gimmicky. I always got better directional audio out of stereo mode than with any of the virtual surround stuff. And the Maxwell already has better imaging and soundstage than the vast majority of gaming headsets out there.
Just remember I'm comparing these to actual audiophile headphones that have been tuned for music. EQ may really bring these to life in terms of the audio quality. I'm not a huge fan of the Audeze tune. If I didn't have my Sundara setup I think my perception of the audio here would be skewed much higher but switching between them I am not nearly as impressed. Beats the shit out of my old gaming headset though.

The cheese was 2 broken off chunks my mother had in her fridge for a long time. Smelled fine, tasted fine. She gave them to me. I put them in the trunk (they were packed in a Ziploc bag in a grocery bag with two Ziploc bags of grapes) and forgot about them until tonight.
SoCal has had humid temperatures all week, with a couple days of rain and a day or two of one & off sun and clouds.
The rainy days had highs in the mid-60's & lows in the mid-40's. The warmer days w/ a little sun had highs in the lower 70's & lows in the lower 50's.
There is no mold, but a greasy feeling is all over them. They smell strong, the way the cheese should small (or so I hope...)
Is it safe to eat? What signs should I look for regarding the cheese if it is is spoiled/molded over (there is no white crust that sometimes covers parmesan cheese that's been left out. How can I test it to see if it's safe? Any other telltale signs? Or should I just toss it to be safe. Each one is approximately 2x2x3 inches in size. Not huge, but not a small nub either.

I will try to summarise a few key things about my life:

• As a kid, was sensitive - looking back, I can say almost certainly that I had an arrogant, insecure, unaware father, who sort of approached everything with anger (at least in memory now). I remember being aloof at times (during sports sessions, etc.). Always felt "I was not good enough" and ruminated. Was not the best in studies either, though my dad had high expectations in that regard. An introverted kid who would mingle with similars only. Tried to avoid confrontation, had stage fear, etc. However, I was also a pampered kid, in the sense, we didn't have any major financial difficulties and my mom was very loving and kind. One thing to note, is I always felt weirdly envious about other boys having girlfriends and dating, etc. Always associated that with self-worth?
• In the 9th grade (age 14), dad passed suddenly. And it was a huge shocker. At that moment, I obviously didn't know how to handle it - just told myself I need to be more responsible and work harder.
• That's what I did, but my anxieties were ever-present, we moved to a new city and the new environment had me off-guard in many ways. Used to feel anxious and low. Forayed into spirituality and tried to find answers to all of this (I've always been like this).
• Having scored extremely well in my 10th, got admitted to a rigorous 11/12th course. The demands were way too much and I always felt like I didn't belong and had no motivation. Right after this had my first relationship in which I was super-clingy (associated deep validation with being with her).
• After that relationship broke, had another where she ditched me and went with another guy. Looking back I hardly engaged in that relationship, so she went where she received love. But this left me crestfallen, I felt so insecure and had deep confidence issues. Always had body issues, but this was at the worst, so I began my journey of self-improvement. Almost obsessively.
• This made me a super-perfectionist and my 3rd relationship was majorly to fill the void and feel approved and validated once again. It was beautiful. This was the best phase of my life so far, but due to certain reasons, even that had to break.
• After that, I wanted to focus on my career and worked extra hard and diligently, all while I had not resolved many things internally - almost always told myself positive thoughts and built rules.
• Now after my anxiety has hit the extreme threshold (was frozen during interviews, exams), I feel a part of me is broken and always aware. Always trying to "solve the problem"/"look for the problem".

More importantly, during my second half of sleep, I feel some old anxious moments (though dreams, these are thoughts as I'm quasi-awake) - me comparing myself with another friend, him physically stronger... Me having these insecure thoughts in sleep... Me feeling overpowered while fighting physically, me feeling disgruntled, creating a scene, and leaving. Each time this happens, that anxiety of the situation just gets absorbed into the body (is what I feel). Worry about how I've confronted the past, should have had better-coping mechanisms, and should have dealt with these beliefs earlier... I used to feel insecure about my body, hence I couldn't joke about it... Others laughing felt like a threat, etc., etc. (all of these in said dream-like states that I'm aware of)
I'm really looking to heal the inner child (subconsciously), let him know that things were not in my control and what has happened is the past, and now - the adult me is resourceful and capable. But my body is not capable of this, or at least feels like gaslighting myself. How do I confront this at a subconscious level - I have weekly therapy sessions with a schema therapist and have tried medication in the past (though they left me with side effects, etc.)
Is anyone else out here who can help? with similar experiences? It's very hard to live with this focus on my symptoms, and anhedonia.

There's many reasons, but simply this works. (I am fasting for weight loss. "you" comments are directed at myself.)
Fasting is the first diet where a) I trust the process - there's no tricks and sales b) it is sustainable for me as a permanent lifestyle c) it is working and it will work as hard as i do. (105kg to 100kg)
On a sunday I like to go to the pub and have a parmy with a beer. I still can do that (minus the beer, see stopdrinking.)
One afternnon this week I had to see a physio. Firstly, this man reminds me of me - He's about my age (40s), he's tried to lose weight but has a beer gut, and he has used a pre-made meal service in the past - but regained the weight. His BMI sitting around 34, and like myself he's been trying to lose weight in multiple ways. When I mentioned my fasting he ADVISED ME AGAINST IT as it was some 'new fad diet'. This whole interaction became Fuel For The Machine.
Weight loss rule number one is, don't take advice from fat people. Even if they are in medicine.
Other Dieting and weight loss - i've tried the premade meal service, hitting the gym 7 days a week, intermittent fasting (which i still respect and am doing it informally, see OMAD), and seeing a nutritionist - her advice was 3 meals a day with carbs included(!) each meal. I've done the low fat diet, low carb diet, eating frequently 6 times a day, keto, and so on. Only fasting has been effective immediately, leaving me energetic and awake before my 4am alarm each day. I no longer have to follow every goddamned trend that comes along. I am certain that in the next 12months we'll hear about some new superfood. I will carry on doing normal things.
***
What is the perfect way to stay hungry and not lose any weight? Eat often throughout the day with carbs on the plate while limiting calories.
Why will you stay hungry doing this? because it creates both the expectation of regular food into the body while not eating enough calories. Your insulin will spike at each meal, when it declines hunger will follow afterwards and you'll be thinking about food again. The carbs/plant based food are low nutrition so micronutrients are being missed as well, the satiety foods are fatty and high protein. Simply put, steak is on the menu, wheat is OUT.
Why won't you* lose weight doing this?
Because you don't have time to reach into ketosis, autophagy, fat burning.
The Insulin spike following any kind of food allows food to be stored in cells (making you fat) and prevents the feeling of fullness (making you hungry). Insulin deserves it's own diatribe.
***
YOUR BODY NEEDS FOOD.
Look down. Grab a chunk of belly fat. That is the food that you should eat, and that is going to be ignored while you keep chewing food - any food - and swallowing it. This is why your new diet didn't work, protein shakes, superfoods, and any other measures. That tub of protein powder with fit skinny people on the side of it - it still counts as food, it still generates an insulin spike when you consume it. It still prevents you sourcing nutrition from the calories around your middle. (I absolutely do use protein powder when it is needed for a specific reason.)
What's wrong with The CICO approach (why don't you just count calories?)

1. It's laborious. Different calories have different effects. Screw all that work. I've got better things to do, and I want to eat food without feeling guilty.
2. It doesn't work - do you want millions of examples of fat people who have all tried CICO?They are everywhere. 1/3 of people are medically obese. If it did work, people would pick their target weight and do CICO until it is achieved. This is not what we observe among obese people. "Yes but people don't follow nutritionists' advice" Really? The same people were told to cut out cholestorol, stop smoking and reduce fat - they did so and we see across the board, less smoking, fatty foods and cholesterol intake. CICO failed.
3. You can still get obesity and constant hunger with CICO because of regular sugar intake and regular insulin spikes.
4. It actually does work - when used logically to go into a fasted state at intervals.
5. CICO used logically equals fasting.

​
Other things i'm enjoying with fasting:
Clean body odour - less shopping - easy to resist fast food - Permanently clean kitchen - saving money. LOOKING FIT.
Conclusion:
This way of life is completely under my control. It frees me from slavery to 'new information' about health and weight loss. It is 100% sure to keep working. It prevents cancer. It does not need to be minutely tracked, although I use a fasting tracker for my own satisfaction. It has no drawbacks. I get to eat a big meal (feast) on days where there is no fast planned. I'm going to still be doing this in 12months, alleviating the mental drain of thinking about it all the time.
This is the diet that will carry me forward another 45 years in good health.
​
*(When I say "YOU" These results and observations are directed at myself, YMMV.)

I’m 2 months into my apprenticeship as a mechanic I really like the job a lot. That being said I feel like I keep messing up and it’s causing me so much anxiety that I can’t relax on my days off because I’m almost sure I fucked something up. My boss has yelled at me a few times for not tightening something enough and having to go behind me to fix it. I think it’s fair for him to be pissed, but my confidence in myself is so low right now idk what to do. I dread going into work because I’m sure I’m gonna be berated once again for something. I’m not sure how to handle things and could use some perspective.

Germany: What are your thoughts on proposed Legalization light?
Yesterday the decriminalization idea leaked. There was not really a proper press conference though it was the deadline to share the plan.However it looks like that decriminalization is priority. No imports are projected. Just productiin in Germany. How do you see this impacting the stocks of the Canadian companies? Almost no positive impact? Very little positive impact as this anyhow sends a positive message? Or negative impact as investors were betting on full legalization? ->though at these all time low levels how much lower can prices go? Maybe just the survival of the fittest is now beginning.
Submitted April 01, 2023 at 08:06AM

I've started a new journey recently to play through Final Fantasy 7 without using any magic or materia.
I'm going with the basic rules of the challenge.
Materia must be taken off when able to. Inns are able to be used to heal in grinding areas
Starting off I had some trouble with the first boss battle. I kept hitting the tail laser messing up the timing and taking major damage which left me short going back up the reactor.
Making it through the second reactor wasn't hard but having a low leveled Arieth during the next part was a slight bit difficult. She doesn't have a strong attack which made the house a demon to battle.
Also another thing I had trouble getting used to was manually saving. I feel like I'll be repeating stuff once in a while because of that.

i don't think i'll ever find love. it doesn't come from just a place of low self esteem, either. i've been homeschooled since i was 10. i'm 16 now, i turn 17 in june. my parents have hardly ever taken me out of the house. i'm not in any clubs or anything. i've been rotting away inside my house for almost 7 years. with that, all of my already non existent social skills flew out of the window. i have severe social anxiety now, and i don't know how to function in the outside world. even if i wanted to approach someone, i can't.
i don't have any friends besides online ones, but since we're all getting older, those friends are slowly starting to become more and more distant. they all have relationships now, and while i'm happy for them, i can't help but also envy them. while they all get to go out and have fun/find love, i'm stuck in my bedroom waiting for it to be night again so i can be asleep and not have to think about anything.
it hurts a lot. i won't ever be able to experience simple things that everyone else experiences all the time. i won't ever be able to have late night phone calls with a significant other. i won't ever be able to worry about what i should wear to a date. i won't ever be able to tell a significant other how much i love and appreciate them and hear the same back. i won't ever be romantically desired by anyone.
i've briefly told my friends that i don't think i'll ever find anyone, just when the topic is brought up. they always tell me they're positive i'll find someone and what-not, but i know that those are empty words and that even they know that there's no hope for me because of my circumstances. i tell them that it's okay every time, and that i've accepted it. but i really haven't, i'm just trying to convince myself that i have. i think that that's better than having false hope.
i'm trying to come to terms with it. i still have my friends to love, and they (hopefully) love me back. not everybody needs a significant other in their life to be happy, though i really wish i had one. but even though i'm trying to accept that i'll be romantically lonely, sometimes i want to stop trying to accept it and just sink into the feeling of knowing that nobody will ever love me like that and sulk. i assume that that's part of the process, though.
this is all really corny and i apologize for that, i just needed to put it somewhere and didn't want to burden my friends with something so overwhelming. i hope one day i can look back on this post and laugh knowing that i was completely wrong

Period: 1191.73 days

	Submissions	Comments
Total	996	4401
Rate (per day)	0.84	3.69
Unique Redditors	206	1060
Combined Score	69328	15944

Top Submitters' Top Submissions

1. 13263 points, 214 submissions: BigSurround2
   
   1. [OLD] JNU Professor Nivedita Menon tells students "Hindu Society" is the most violent society in world (186 points, 79 comments)
   2. this (144 points, 5 comments)
   3. Construction of Ram Mandir in Ayodhya is an important milestone for indigenous civilizations, all around the world. It must start the revolution. #RamMandirAyodhya (141 points, 33 comments)
   4. Chicago, London, Auckland, Brisbane, Perth, Toronto, Johannesburg, Tokyo, Moscow, New Delhi, Mumbai, Banglore, Kolkata ... 100 such cities will join the Protest on 14th June Sunday. World will witness amazing unity among Hindus against murder of #AjayPandita (119 points, 1 comment)
   5. True Indology: "In 1400, Sikandar killεd Brahmins who refused to discard Janeu & convert. 37 kg of Janeu collected from dead & burnt. Now, they killεd last Hindu Sarpanch of Kashmir. Janeu turns red. Kashmir "struggle" is 620 year war to eliminate Janeu. Never let anyone tell you otherwise." (119 points, 2 comments)
   6. It's time for the world to pay the due attention. We won't be silenced now. #MainBhiKashmiriHindu #KashmiriHindus (116 points, 0 comments)
   7. THE GREAT OPRESSION THEORY (115 points, 1 comment)
   8. “Hindus do not come, your names are not on the list.” Sad story of 'Hindus' in Bangladesh. #HumanRights (110 points, 16 comments)
   9. Pseudo secularism: a curse for Hindus.. A mini comic.. (108 points, 5 comments)
   10. करिश्मा का करिश्मा #Azan #karishmaBhosle #Azaan #लाउडस्पीकर_जिहाद (104 points, 1 comment)
2. 8260 points, 138 submissions: Fluid-Lock
   
   1. Fake news propaganda. (133 points, 9 comments)
   2. Tweets of tru indology banned in India. Even though the source is verified. (113 points, 12 comments)
   3. Saffron Tilak Challenge (97 points, 0 comments)
   4. The terrorist that killed 25 Afghan Sikhs was from Kerla. (96 points, 9 comments)
   5. Foubd this on comment section of latest Shekar Gupta video (95 points, 0 comments)
   6. In Communist ruled Bengal (1982), 17 Sadhus including a woman were dragged out of a taxi and lynchεd to death by a mob in broad daylight. They made SAME allegation. That those Hindu Sadhus were child lifters. Allegation turned out to be FAKE. Beware of left-liberal FRAUD! (95 points, 2 comments)
   7. This is what RSS has done for people of India during Corona Crisis. (95 points, 13 comments)
   8. Anoop Singh Cop in Jammu and Kashmir today lost his life in a Terror Attack by Radical Muslim terrorist organisations. May he Rest in peace. (93 points, 4 comments)
   9. Taqqiya - The art of lying (90 points, 0 comments)
   10. He was lynched for carrying the national flag. (88 points, 0 comments)
3. 5137 points, 82 submissions: Glass-Earth
   
   1. this (149 points, 5 comments)
   2. Palestinian Islamic Scholar Nidhal Siam at Al-Aqsa Mosque Rally: The Only Response to the “Cow-Worshipping” Hindus’ Affront to the Prophet Muhammad is to Declare Jihad to Eradicate Them (131 points, 32 comments)
   3. 6 June, 1674 (Jyeshta Shukla Trayodashi) - a historic day! 346 years ago this day - coronation of 'Chatrapati Shivaji Maharaj', at the Raigad Fort. The beginning of a new era. The era of 'Swarajya'. (118 points, 0 comments)
   4. 'The Wire' has managed to make the Telinipara, West Bengal riots an anti-Muslim pogrom (115 points, 27 comments)
   5. [Nupur J Sharma] OpIndia is all set to release a 350 page report on the Delhi Riots 2020 that trace the genesis of the violence right from 1st December 2019 till the 26th of February. Islamists, their support system and the grand conspiracy covered in a comprehensive report by OpIndia. Soon! (107 points, 4 comments)
   6. True Indology: "When loudspeakers were FIRST introduced in India in 20th century Both Deoband & Tablighi Jamaat OPPOSED loudspeaker. They called it Haram western innovation. Were those traditional Mμslims "Islαmophobes"? STOP shouting 5 times a day on loudspeaker that only your God is real." (98 points, 1 comment)
   7. Such ads have become common in Jammu. The region is going through an aggressive demographic change. People of Jammu have been pleading for help, but the central government is not listening. (91 points, 8 comments)
   8. A journalist 'Rizwana Tabassum' was found dead in Uttar Pradesh. See what Newslaundry chose to highlight first. And then see what was in the actual story. (89 points, 2 comments)
   9. Several books banned, countless people put behind the bars, careers and families destroyed. Section 295 A of IPC has a long history of silencing Hindu voices. Here is its history. #Repeal295A (87 points, 1 comment)
   10. जय श्री राम।। (86 points, 2 comments)
4. 3522 points, 51 submissions: Busy_Art
   
   1. "Feminism" in India (110 points, 10 comments)
   2. Comparing an innocent animal with a rioter is highly condemnable (107 points, 1 comment)
   3. “It’s a curse to be born in an Islamic country” says mother of the 14-year-old abducted Hindu girl in Sindh, Pakistan (107 points, 19 comments)
   4. True Indology: "Thousands of terrorists indulge in killiηg & bombing. They swear by one Arabic holy book. Secular gang: Terror has no religion! One Brahmin goes criminal. Killεd fellow Brahmin police officers. Doesn't swear by any Brahmin/Hindu book. Secular gang: Oh look! Brahmin terrorist!" (105 points, 1 comment)
   5. Hindus have been requesting Netflix to stop insulting Hindus and their deities; but it seems they do it intentionally. Clip from their latest movie 'Chippa' where they are mocking Hanuman and are not even pretending to be subtle. Movie is written and directed by Safdar Rahman (104 points, 25 comments)
   6. Muslim mob torched properties of Hindus till 24th Feb night, burnt Dilbar Negi alive: Fresh charge sheet against 12 in Delhi riots (104 points, 2 comments)
   7. Anti-Hindu Delhi riots: The Wire and NDTV whitewash how a Muslim school was used as an attack base by Islamists and how a Hindu owned school was brutalised (103 points, 0 comments)
   8. It’s only when Brahmins display casteism that the caste gets mentioned in the headline. If perpetrators of caste-based discrimination are non-Brahmin Hindus, headlines say ‘upper caste’. If perpetrator is a Muslim, it’s simply ‘man’. (95 points, 4 comments)
   9. Look at their age, and what’s being said in the audio. Go to the audio of this particular post, and you’ll find 100s of videos spewing hatred on other religions. THESE ARE KIDS, FOR GOD’S SAKE. And they're glorifying kiIIing of people (91 points, 8 comments)
   10. #Breaking Ayodhya: Construction of Ram Mandir begins. (88 points, 11 comments)
5. 3389 points, 42 submissions: sarinmall85
   
   1. Yogiji bulldozing illegal mosque of bareilly (175 points, 12 comments)
   2. Hindu warrior kids chasing ladies missionaries by chanting "Jai Shri Ram" (161 points, 6 comments)
   3. Massive protest in Nepal against communist government. They are demanding Hindu monarchy again (147 points, 11 comments)
   4. Tableau of Ram mandir that you will see tomorrow in republic day parade (133 points, 4 comments)
   5. Bajrang dal & VHP activists protest against demolition of temple by Kejriwal Govt (128 points, 2 comments)
   6. Keralites celebrating BJP victory in their own style with elephant & Music (128 points, 7 comments)
   7. School children singing Hanuman Chalisa (127 points, 3 comments)
   8. Hindu Procession in kashmir after 35 years (118 points, 5 comments)
   9. You may have seen Muslims offering Namaz on public places but rarely you may have seen any Brahman Offering evening on Public place. This is from Lucknow Airport. Brahmans are offering prayers fearlessly under Yogiji (116 points, 4 comments)
   10. 2 year kid chant mantras fluently (113 points, 1 comment)
6. 2746 points, 12 submissions: Hindutva_Soldier
   
   1. Aawaz mat Uthao bhaiyo (412 points, 20 comments)
   2. Jai Bhavani , jai shivaji (387 points, 16 comments)
   3. Found this on YouTube (332 points, 3 comments)
   4. A great tribute to our Great ancestors , they fought when they were given two options either convert or die , hope it inspires mordern hindus (297 points, 7 comments)
   5. Why I killed Gandhi , do watch this movie ,congress is trying to ban this movie (285 points, 2 comments)
   6. Kindly support him (252 points, 4 comments)
   7. Sab Dekhenge (252 points, 8 comments)
   8. Future pm of india (126 points, 4 comments)
   9. kindly support this guys (112 points, 9 comments)
   10. Hanuman chalisa - Everyday 7 times without fail (105 points, 6 comments)
7. 1632 points, 24 submissions: TheInsaneM
   
   1. "Aurangzeb paraded Sambhaji Maharaj in clown's dress and had Mughal soldiers laugh at Sambhaji Maharaj before killing him"? My response to a recent post on India. (166 points, 76 comments)
   2. Mughal India - The biggest holocaust in world history (151 points, 24 comments)
   3. The shocking reality of Ghazwa-e-Hind. They won't tell you this. It is happening. (114 points, 34 comments)
   4. The legend of Veer Savarkar. The man you know, the story you don't. (103 points, 10 comments)
   5. The exodus of Kashmiri Pandits. A forgotten story. (92 points, 4 comments)
   6. Modern problems require Sanatan solutions. (91 points, 0 comments)
   7. How Communists tried to destroy Indian culture. (70 points, 1 comment)
   8. Bhavani ke veero, jaag jaao isse pehle ki der hojaye! (61 points, 2 comments)
   9. 18 Hindu houses burnt in Telangana as a result of anti-CAA protests. No mainstream media has covered this news. BJP urges the Hindu society to unite and retaliate. (59 points, 1 comment)
   10. The Mitrokhin Archive — The Special Relationship With India [Part 1: The supremacy of the Indian National Congress] (57 points, 16 comments)
8. 1128 points, 6 submissions: TheZodiac66
   
   1. Made it today 🚩Jai Shri Ram 🚩 (275 points, 11 comments)
   2. made it today! (235 points, 7 comments)
   3. God of Gods Lord Shiva Supremacy! check comments for more insta vids! (223 points, 4 comments)
   4. Lord Indra Supremacy check comment for more vid. (148 points, 12 comments)
   5. JAI HANUMAN! Check comment for insta link. (141 points, 4 comments)
   6. Om Indra Devaya Namah! 🕉️ (106 points, 3 comments)
9. 894 points, 7 submissions: EyePrior5087
   
   1. I support Nupur Sharma ji (321 points, 31 comments)
   2. not oc ( Ig - @theangryvaanar) (210 points, 9 comments)
   3. did you know that? (124 points, 8 comments)
   4. From ig - @theangryvaanar (78 points, 1 comment)
   5. From - The Angry Vaanar ( additional information in comments) (62 points, 2 comments)
   6. size of soul according to our scriptures ( source _ @theangryvaanar Ig ) (57 points, 4 comments)
   7. origin of violin through Ravanhatha ( credits - @theangryvaanar ig) (42 points, 0 comments)
10. 815 points, 11 submissions: Rishx
    
    1. ISKCON devotees distributing arabic edition of Srimad Bhagavad Gita to muslims. (131 points, 4 comments)
    2. A compilation of speeches given by some prominent muslim leaders who have spoken about Hindus. (102 points, 22 comments)
    3. District wise percentage of muslim population on Bengal region. (91 points, 10 comments)
    4. That's how it's done. (81 points, 1 comment)
    5. He is right. (76 points, 0 comments)
    6. Some Hindus get so angry when so called Hindu jewish unity is questioned. Guess who is supporting 'dismantling global Hindutva' event? (76 points, 17 comments)
    7. Oops..I think he dropped /s . (73 points, 2 comments)
    8. District wise percentage of muslim population in Assam. (60 points, 2 comments)
    9. Hypocrites. (48 points, 0 comments)
    10. [Swarajya Magazine]India's own BBC : Prasar Bharati to set up DD International channel to Project India's point of view. (40 points, 1 comment)

Top Commenters

1. BigSurround2 (589 points, 155 comments)
2. Fluid-Lock (353 points, 89 comments)
3. TheInsaneM (335 points, 51 comments)
4. Resurgence28 (292 points, 47 comments)
5. Busy_Art (195 points, 38 comments)
6. DauntlessDev (163 points, 21 comments)
7. Glass-Earth (149 points, 35 comments)
8. ProfessorOak11 (139 points, 17 comments)
9. realist_optimist (137 points, 17 comments)
10. mystiquemystic (123 points, 26 comments)

Top Submissions

1. please share as much as possible by Hindutva_ (668 points, 17 comments)
2. Aawaz mat Uthao bhaiyo by Hindutva_Soldier (412 points, 20 comments)
3. . by IshaanOberoi (402 points, 15 comments)
4. Jai Bhavani , jai shivaji by Hindutva_Soldier (387 points, 16 comments)
5. Jaiiiiiii Shree Ram 🚩 by anshbanka_9281 (379 points, 10 comments)
6. Found this on YouTube by Hindutva_Soldier (332 points, 3 comments)
7. I support Nupur Sharma ji by EyePrior5087 (321 points, 31 comments)
8. A great tribute to our Great ancestors , they fought when they were given two options either convert or die , hope it inspires mordern hindus by Hindutva_Soldier (297 points, 7 comments)
9. Why I killed Gandhi , do watch this movie ,congress is trying to ban this movie by Hindutva_Soldier (285 points, 2 comments)
10. Made it today 🚩Jai Shri Ram 🚩 by TheZodiac66 (275 points, 11 comments)

Top Comments

1. 37 points: Insane-M's comment in They're distorting. What're we supposed to do?
2. 36 points: Kaptanprithvi's comment in As a South Indian, I have a genuine question to all the Hindi speakers here.
3. 35 points: Tony_stark_2020's comment in They're distorting. What're we supposed to do?
4. 33 points: deleted's comment in "Aurangzeb paraded Sambhaji Maharaj in clown's dress and had Mughal soldiers laugh at Sambhaji Maharaj before killing him"? My response to a recent post on India.
5. 33 points: ProfessorOak11's comment in Hindus have been requesting Netflix to stop insulting Hindus and their deities; but it seems they do it intentionally. Clip from their latest movie 'Chippa' where they are mocking Hanuman and are not even pretending to be subtle. Movie is written and directed by Safdar Rahman
6. 33 points: chaturthyam's comment in The shocking reality of Ghazwa-e-Hind. They won't tell you this. It is happening.
7. 32 points: thande_papa12's comment in Islamisation of Maharashtra has started by Uddhav Thackeray's Shiv Sena. Now they won't need to burn Police Stations, but they will use them to kill Hindus.
8. 31 points: Resurgence28's comment in Won't even pay respect.
9. 31 points: realist_optimist's comment in Yogiji bulldozing illegal mosque of bareilly
10. 29 points: Pranavboi's comment in After Muslims complain about ‘idol worshiping’, PUBG removes a mode from their mobile game that allegedly involved it

Generated with BBoe's Subreddit Stats

#[QQRR] is a unique tag I'll use for my diaries so it'll be searchable in google. In case my account is deleted and my computer is destroyed, I can still read this when I get a new device.
Criteria of an emotionally abusive parent
Constant Criticism
Many parents who are emotionally abusive are also highly critical. This repeated criticism leads to children developing issues with self-doubt and low self-esteem, as they are unable to make decisions for themselves growing up. Being frequently told that one’s choices and actions are wrong results in feelings of low self-worth and worry about being verbally attacked for these choices.
Passive-Aggression
Passive-aggressive behavior is incredibly common in households where there is a presence of emotional abuse. When people are not able to have needs met through effective and healthy forms of communication, they will often resort to passive aggressive behaviors. Some examples of this include making sarcastic comments, frequently “forgetting” appointments or important days, or making “jokes” about things that a parent is actually unhappy about.
Threats
Threats are commonly used in abusive households as a form of punishment, and are always unhealthy. This behavior is scary for a child, who in turn learns to behave out of fear of punishment, not necessarily because they learn what is right. This may look like parents threatening to do something that will put the child’s emotional or physical safety at risk. For example, a parent may threaten to destroy a child’s property or pets for misbehaving, or harm themselves for a child’s actions. Not only is this manipulative, it is also terrifying for a child to experience.
Humiliation
Nobody likes being embarrassed–when this humiliation comes from your own parents, it is especially traumatic. This form of abuse is cruel and performed to cause harm, and does not include the unintentional embarrassment a child experiences if they are reprimanded in public.
Examples of humiliation include sharing personal information about the child to others in an attempt to embarrass and punish them. Children who experience such parental behaviors are more prone to symptoms of depression, shame, and low self-worth, unless they receive the support they need to work through these feelings.
I took an online quiz to see if my parents are abusive, here are my answers:
How often do your parents threaten to hurt you?
- When I do something really wrong
How often does your parent compare you with your friends or relatives?
- Often
How often do you feel it is hard to say no to something you don't like doing?
- Often
Do your parents insult you? call you names you don't like?
- Often, whenever i do something wrong
How often do your parents make you feel bad when you commit a mistake?
- Often
How often do you feel that your parents are ignoring you?
- Sometimes
How often do your parents ignore your feelings?
- Often
How often do your parents make you feel bad about your choices?
- Often
How often do your parents criticize the way you look?
- Often
How often do your parents provoke you to start an argument?
- Often
I was told that my parents have signs and symptoms of emotional abuse. But what do I know? I'm not a therapist.
My parents say that therapy is a waste of time and money. They tell me I'm just crazy faggot who complains a lot.
If I could set up cameras and recorders so you could listen how abusive you are, I bet you'll chalk it up as "discipline".
Criteria of an abusive relationship:
Controlling and possessive behavior
- They check on you all the time to see where you are, what you're doing and who you're with
- They try to control where you go and who you see, and get angry if you don't do what they say.
Being unreasonably jealous
- They accuse you of being unfaithful or of flirting
- They isolate you from family and friends, often by behaving rudely to them.
Put-downs
- They put you down, either publicly or privately, by attacking your intelligence, looks, mental health or capabilities
- They constantly compare you unfavourably to others
- They blame you for all the problems in your relationship, and for their violent outbursts
- They say things like, 'No one else will want you.'
Threats
- They yell or sulk, and deliberately break things that you value
- They threaten to use violence against you, your family, friends or a pet.
Physical and sexual violence
- They push, shove, hit or grab you
- They force or trick you into having sex or doing things you don't want to do
- They harm you, your pets or your family members.
Shit, Frankie fits the entire criteria and even tell me it's all my fault and then treat me like trash. My parents would probably still think I'm worshipping Frankie, because they're incapable of changing their minds and hold grudges.
If I had figured out, or at least understood that I'm emotionally abused, I never would've gotten into a relationship. Suffering parental abuse could lead getting into abusive relationship. Not only that, I feel trapped.
Different place, different kind of abuse.
My abusive partner wouldn't let me earn my own money or become independent and self-sustaining. My parents are the same. The moment I leave, I know I'd be left with nothing because they "bought" all my stuff and I'm just borrowing them. My clothes? My food? my gadgets? It belongs to my parents. I'd die in the street the moment they throw me out.

I unblocked him. Sometimes I feel ok talking to him, other times not. He will talk to me as long as I let him, until he gets bored or meets someone else. I feel sick. I need to learn to ignore him. It's so hard. I was happy today cos he was talking to me and being nice but after a few hours of no reply, the reality sets in and I'm upset again. It is so unhealthy. I know he just talks to me cos he is bored and upset about the girl he moved on with who left him. I am again at his mercy, even if I don't want to date him. He holds a lot of significance. I need the strength to cut him off. I succeeded but then felt bad and unblocked to talk. He wasted my time with no hesitation and has used me for support while upset about another girl and I have allowed it. The past month has been really emotionally hard. I want a hug and some comfort.Having him in my life makes me feel low and almost unloveable. I have a headache and so much to do but my focus is on him. I ignore my family and friends when I'm anxious about him, even though they are the people who have my back and like me. I am sick of intense feelings. I am hurting myself for someone who just wants attention and validation. Last time I saw him I felt in my heart that I still love him, in a deep and caring way. Idk if it's real. I want a hug. All he cares about is this other girl

I have recently gotten into making bread and oh my god, it's so much fun. But I have run into a little issue. If I make a loaf, it'll be gone in like four days and I have to make a new one. The reason I started doing this was because it's cheap, tasty and low effort. But I can't really be bothered with making bread twice a week. But if I bake in bulk, it goes bad too fast.
I store my bread in the fridge in a tight plastic bag. Because it goes mouldy or dries out super fast at room temp for me. And I never really got the hang of freezing and thawing bread without it becoming this dry and crumbly mess.
Tips?

The first time I ever really left my body I was at a very low point in my life with no food, money or friends, and I was just barely scraping along when one night I gave up all hope and decided to try and over do it with acid. I took 3 tabs (can't remember how much each one was) and then proceeded to lie in bed in the darkness and "see what happened" (keep in mind I'd never heard the term 'hero dose' or 'moon shot' before so this experience was completely unfimiliar to me, I just didn't know what to do anymore)
I was approached by three beings of light, humanoid, but they looked like what happens to your eyes when you stare at the sun too long, just pure light. For some reason the whole time they were coming toward me my mind was screaming no over and over.
I then did what I can only describe as falling through my bed, I slipped down a sort of inter-dimensional tunnel of pitch black which led me to an alternate version of my bedroom; I knew it was my room but when I stood up out of bed I realised I wasn't walking, I was floating. I floated over to my bedroom door and opened it to find an artist that I cherish waiting for me on the other side, he seemed excited to see me like he was waiting for me; He said to me with a big grin on his face "yeahhh there he issss" while getting closer and closer the whole time, until he was over me.
Then I slipped again, further into the void.
It felt like I was a fish being let back into the ocean after being in captivity it's whole life, I felt free, I had no bodily form and I could just fly through the darkness forever, it was beautiful.
Eventually I came across what I can only describe as the tree of life, but I was viewing it from a distance, like I wasn't allowed any closer... It had sky blue energy spewing from the branches upward and it was drawing amber energy into its trunk from it's roots, this vision is pretty self explanatory but it also perplexes me to this day and I haven't found anybody that has seen what I've seen.
If somebody could let me know potentially where I went or why I experienced what I did it would mean the world to me, and maybe this story will help someone else get clarity as well.

Hello!
For my headshot photographers out there, I am looking to build a headshot set up and I have $1000 in credit to use at aputure and amaran. I know this is considered low end, but are there any lighting recommendations/combo i should get from these companies? primarily looking to get lighting for headshots and self tapes.
​
Thank you!

I will try to summarise a few key things about my life:

• As a kid, was sensitive - looking back, I can say almost certainly that I had an arrogant, insecure, unaware father, who sort of approached everything with anger (at least in memory now). I remember being aloof at times (during sports sessions, etc.). Always felt "I was not good enough" and ruminated. Was not the best in studies either, though my dad had high expectations in that regard. An introverted kid who would mingle with similars only. Tried to avoid confrontation, had stage fear, etc. However, I was also a pampered kid, in the sense we didn't have any major financial difficulties and mom was very loving and kind. One thing to note, is I always felt weirdly envious about other boys having girlfriends and dating, etc. Always associated that with self-worth?
• In the 9th grade (age 14), dad passed suddenly. And it was a huge shocker. At that moment, I obviously didn't know how to handle it - just told myself I need to be more responsible and work harder.
• That's what I did, but my anxieties were ever-present, we moved to a new city and the new environment had me off-guard in many ways. Used to feel anxious and low. Forayed into spirituality and tried to find answers to all of this (I've always been like this).
• Having scored extremely well in my 10th, got admitted to a rigorous 11/12th course. The demands were way too much and I always felt like I didn't belong and had no motivation. Right after this had my first relationship in which I was super-clingy (associated deep validation with being with her).
• After that relationship broke, had another where she ditched me and went with another guy. Looking back I hardly engaged in that relationship, so she went where she received love. But this left me crestfallen, I felt so insecure and had deep confidence issues. Always had body issues, but this was at the worst, so I began my journey of self-improvement. Almost obsessively.
• This made me a super-perfectionist and my 3rd relationship was majorly to fill the void and feel approved and validated once again. It was beautiful. This was the best phase of my life so far, but due to certain reasons, even that had to break.
• After that, I wanted to focus on my career and worked extra hard and diligently, all while I had not resolved many things internally - almost always told myself positive thoughts and built rules.
• Now after my anxiety has hit the extreme threshold (was frozen during interviews, exams), I feel a part of me is broken and always aware. Always trying to "solve the problem"/"look for the problem".

More importantly, during my second half of sleep, I feel some old anxious moments (though dreams, these are thoughts as I'm quasi-awake) - me comparing myself with another friend, him physically stronger... Me having these insecure thoughts in sleep... Me feeling overpowered while fighting physically, me feeling disgruntled, creating a scene, and leaving. Each time this happens, that anxiety of the situation just gets absorbed into the body (is what I feel). Worry about how I've confronted the past, should have had better-coping mechanisms, and should have dealt with these beliefs earlier... I used to feel insecure about my body, hence I couldn't joke about it... Others laughing felt like a threat, etc., etc. (all of these in said dream-like states that I'm aware of)
I'm really looking to heal the inner child (subconsciously), let him know that things were not in my control and what has happened is the past, and now - the adult me is resourceful and capable. But my body is not capable of this, or at least feels like gaslighting myself. How do I confront this at a subconscious level - I have weekly therapy sessions with a schema therapist and have tried medication in the past (though they left me with side effects, etc.)
Is anyone else out here who can help? with similar experiences? It's very hard to live with this focus on my symptoms, and anhedonia.