Downtown kenosha car show

In anticipation of the season coming up, you can listen to this in your car at 4am when getting out for the hunt. I present you: The Tom Song.
This thing right here Is lettin' all the turkeys know What jakes talk about You know, the finer things in life Haha Check it out
Ooh that hen so scandalous And you know another turkey couldn't handle it So you shakin' that thang like who's the ish With a look in your eyes so devilish, uh
You like to dance, all the food plot spots And you cruise to crews like connect the dots Not just yelp, she like the cluck 'Cause she was Livin' la Vida Loca
She had dumps like a truck, truck, truck Thighs like what, what, what Baby, move your butt, butt, butt Uh, I think I'll sing it again (c'mon)
She had dumps like a truck, truck, truck Thighs like what, what, what All night long Let me see that to-o-om (c'mon)
Baby (girl, I know you wanna show gobble gobble) That tom t-om, tom, tom I like it when the hen goes (gobble gobble) Baby, make your hen go (gobble gobble) (Girl, I know you wanna show gobble gobble) That tom t-tom t-tom tom, tom (uh, listen)
That hen so scandalous And I know another turkey couldn't handle it And she shakin' that thing like who's the ish With a look in her eyes so devilish, uh
She like to dance all the food plot spots And she cruise to crews to connect the dots Not just yelp, she like the cluck 'Cause she was Livin' la Vida Loca
She had dumps like a truck, truck, truck Thighs like what, what, what Baby, move your butt, butt, butt Uh, I think I'll sing it again (c'mon)
She had dumps like a truck, truck, truck Thighs like what, what, what All night long (c'mon) Let me see that to-o-o-m
Baby (girl, I know you wanna show gobble gobble) That tom t-om, tom, tom I like it when the hen goes (gobble gobble) Baby, make your hen go (gobble gobble) (Girl, I know you wanna show gobble gobble) That tom t-tom t-tom tom, tom (uh, listen)
C'mon (Baby, make your booty go gobble gobble) Baby (girl, I know you wanna show da gobble gobble) That tom t-tom t-tom tom, tom Said I (I like it when the beat goes gobble gobble) Uh (baby, make your booty go gobble gobble) Alright (girl, I know you wanna show da gobble gobble) That tom t-tom t-tom tom, tom
Whoa (da gobble gobble) Uh (gobble gobble) Alright, uh (gobble gobble) Whoa, yeah (gobble gobble) Ooh (gobble gobble) Whoa (I like it when the beat goes gobble gobble) (Baby, make your booty go gobble gobble) Uh (girl, I know you wanna show da gobble gobble) Baby (that tom t-tom t-tom tom, tom) Alright (I like it when the beat goes gobble gobble) (Baby, make your booty go gobble gobble) Girl, I know you wanna show da gobble gobble) (That tom t-tom t-tom tom, tom) Alright (I like it when the beat goes gobble gobble) (Baby, make your booty go gobble gobble) (gobble gobble)

Hi All. I had an old Kia sedan and I rear ended another SUV of a lady in the parking lot. I was going pretty slow and then - thud - I hit the car. Luckily , no one was injured. I tried to assess the damage, and the only thing damaged was the rear indicator light. This was in IN state.
I was uninsured at the time of the incident. She tried calling cops, I offered to pay for the damages , but she called the cops and insurance nevertheless. We waited for few hours but the cops never showed up. She took all my DL details. I got scared after she called the cops so I bought a car insurance right there after the incident. And I shared those details with that lady. She claimed that the tail light and rim of backside were damage because of the hit.
After few months, I get a call from my insurance company. I told them that I was not under insurance at the time of incident and would like to know how much for the damage I would have to pay. They quoted something around 1700. I checked with the other insurance company of the lady, and they were quoting around 2000 for everything.
Do I need to pay this whole amount ? I thought the repair charges to fix tail lights would run around 200 to 500. But the insurance is saying I have to pay for rental car also while the car was in the repair shop.

I (23F) have been on and off friends with this girl (23F) since we were toddlers, pretty much. We grew up together, went to elementary, middle, and highschool together. Right out of highschool she got married and I went to college. We didn't text much but would hang out when I got back into town. I got married in 2020 and shortly after got pregnant and she found out she was pregnant just 3 months after me. We didn't see each other much during the pandemic but would still keep in touch.
Her and I have very different views on many things, but are willing to look past them to still hang out and have our kids play with each other. Lately though, I just feel drained and exhausted after hanging out with her and when I reflect on how she treats me I don't think it's normal or healthy.
She constantly makes different digs at me and passive aggressive comments. For example, I got my septum pierced recently and the first thing out of her mouth was, "Oh.. I'm surprised you didn't get a nostril piercing like what I have." Or everytime she sees a picture of my husband or sees him in person she brings up how he has grown out his hair. To begin with it was just, "Wow, (husband's) hair has gotten long." Then, "Do you like (husband's) hair?" Then, "Ugh, I cannot stand guys with long hair." Then, "My husband isn't going to cut his hair until he's done building our house and it has gotten long enough to put it into a ponytail in the back and I just think it is so gross I can't." Don't get me wrong, I don't care if she doesn't like my husband's hair, but it's weird for her to bring it up so many times and insult him in front of me, in my own home, right?
The list could go on with weird examples of things like these: me showing her a project I'm working on and her wrinkling her nose and asking why two things are different sizes, me showing her a dress I'm going to sew and her saying "I haven't even tried to make something like that..." (She has more experience sewing than I do). Criticizing how my daughter walked because she had a deley and went to physical therapy for it, criticizing us for still having my daughter rear facing in her car seat (she's only 2).
The list just goes on and on with different small, petty things and I cannot decide if she means them as digs at me or if she is just oblivious to how they come across as insults. I feel that at this age she should be more mature. With how she treats me, it feels like she doesn't even like me but yet she is the one who texts me and asks to hang out. So, I'm just confused. Do I continue to put up with her comments and let them roll off my back? Am I being too sensitive, or is what she says really reason to no longer be friends with her? I have a hard time standing up for myself and try to see the best in people, so I'd feel bad cutting her off.
TLDR: My friend, who I've known all my life, makes constant digs at me when we hang out together and it is beginning to exhaust me and make me feel bad. Is it worth ending the friendship over?

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The American expansion phase the CFL went through in the 90's is probably the weirdest period in the history of the league.
For those that don't know anything about that era, a little background
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The early 90's were a very tense time in the league. They were down to eight teams after the Montreal Alouettes folded at the start of the 1987 season and it seemed like almost anyone could be next. BC had a lot of instability in their ownership at that time, Calgary's community ownership was barely scraping by until Larry Ryckman bought the team in 1991, Saskatchewan had to have telethons to raise money and keep them afloat, Hamilton had some bad teams and attendance problems having to compete with both the Argos and the Bills in the NFL, Toronto's ownership group fell apart after Bruce McNall had his legal troubles, and the Gliebermans were causing all sorts of problems in Ottawa.
Larry Smith became the commissioner of the CFL in 1992 and while he's often viewed the main driver of the US expansion, the reality was that Ryckman, McNall and the Gliebermans were really calling the shots. The experiment started in January of 1993 when Sacramento and San Antonio were awarded expansion teams. The owners of the teams, Fred Anderson in Sacramento and Larry Benson in San Antonio both owned teams in the recently suspended World League of American Football. Shortly after that announcement, the first problem emerged. It turns out that Benson didn't have as much money as he claimed to have and tried to borrow some from his brother Tom Benson, the owner of the New Orleans Saints of the NFL. That didn't go over well and San Antonio had to abruptly bail. (this should've been an ominous sign of how this experiment would go) Anderson was willing to bite the bullet as the only US based team and thus the Sacramento Gold Miners were a CFL team during the 1993 season. Most of their players were transplanted from Sacramento's WLAF club and the team of mostly CFL newbies struggled early on with a 2-8 record by Labour Day but played .500 ball after that to finish with a somewhat respectable 6-12 record. (of course they missed the playoffs in the West while a 4-14 Ottawa team made the playoffs in the East, screwy playoff formats in the CFL aren't a recent development)
1994 would see Las Vegas, Shreveport and Baltimore added to the mix. The Shreveport case was interesting as the Pirates were owned by the Gliebermans who sold the Ottawa Rough Riders to Bruce Firestone and got the expansion team in Shreveport. The Pirates were awful losing 14 straight games and ending up with a 3-15 record. Despite that awful record, they managed to have some decent community support and attendance numbers. Las Vegas saw the Posse get off to a 2-0 start but the wheels came flying off at ludicrous speed. They ended up at 5-13 and their attendance numbers were abysmal. An October 15 game against Winnipeg saw only 2350 show up at Sam Boyd Stadium and the last week of season saw a home game against the Eskimos get moved to Edmonton. Sacramento in their second season saw them improve their record to 9-8-1 but were having attendance problems. (they also missed the playoffs in a very competitive West Division while 7-11 Toronto and 4-14 Ottawa made the playoffs in the East)
Baltimore proved to be the most successful of the US clubs, but maybe a little too successful (more on that later). They made headlines early on when they named themselves the Baltimore CFL Colts, an obvious reference to the NFL team that have moved out in the middle of the night a decade earlier. People in Baltimore were also a little cheesed with the NFL at that time having lost out to Carolina and Jacksonville in the bids for expansion teams. The locals viewed the name as a nice little shot at the NFL, but the NFL didn't find it all that funny and right before the season started hit them with a court injunction which prevented them from using that name. Despite the off-field legal issues, the team on the field was pretty damn good. Unlike the other US owners, Baltimore's Jim Speros knew the CFL was a very different animal than the American game and got some proven CFL names for his team. A hall of fame coach in Don Matthews, a hall of fame QB in Tracy Ham, and a hall of fame defensive lineman in Elfrid Payton lead Baltimore to a 12-6 record and second place in the East. The first playoff game on US soil saw Baltimore get a 34-15 win over the Argos in the East Semi-Final, then one week later they went into Winnipeg and beat the Bombers 14-12 to advance to the Grey Cup. The title game in Vancouver was a close battle between BC and Baltimore that was decided on a last second field goal by Lui Passaglia giving the Grey Cup to the Lions with a 26-23 victory.
Things got very weird in the offseason between '94 and '95. It looked like the Las Vegas Posse would be moved to Jackson, Mississippi but that deal blew up in the league's face and they ultimately pulled the plug on that franchise. One relocation did take place as Fred Anderson moved the Sacramento Gold Miners to San Antonio to become the Texans. He did that so he could get a better stadium with the Texans playing in the Alamodome and to reduce their travel costs since they'd be closer to the other US based teams. Two more entered they fray in 1995 with the Memphis Mad Dogs and Birmingham Barracudas joining the ranks while Shreveport and Baltimore returned for another year. The Baltimore club also gave up their legal battle with the NFL and dubbed themselves the Stallions. The 1995 season saw the league realign its divisions placing the eight Canadian clubs were in the North Division with the five US teams were in the South Division. The playoff format would see five teams from the North and three from the South getting into the post-season.
The 1995 season was either the high point or the low point for the expansion experiment depending on how you want to look at things. Shreveport still wasn't very good finishing with a 5-13 record and the dumb crap the Gliebermans did in Ottawa happened again in Shreveport which annoyed many of the locals there. Memphis did ok with a 9-9 record but had some attendance issues and the Liberty Bowl really couldn't handle a CFL sized field. Turf sections had to be added to the grass field, the yard makers were 33 inches apart instead of 36 and the endzones were this really weird pentagon shape that was seven yards deep in the corners and fourteen yards behind the uprights. They also got screwed over by the playoff format as they missed at 9-9 with 8-10 Hamilton and 7-11 Winnipeg got in. Birmingham got some solid attendance numbers early on, but they fell off a cliff once the college football season started. They finished 10-8 and played a 12-6 San Antonio team in the first round of the playoffs and the Barracudas got demolished by a score of 51-9.
That brings us back to Baltimore where the Stallions dominated with a 15-3 record. The post-season started well as they got a 36-21 victory over Winnipeg, but their long term future took a massive hit just days after that game. The strong support that Baltimore gave to the Canadian game caught the attention of Art Modell who that week announced his plan to relocate the Cleveland Browns to Baltimore. Fan and corporate for the Stallions dried up almost instantly now that the NFL would be returning to town. They still got over 30,000 people to Memorial Stadium in their 21-11 win over the Texans that sent them back to the Grey Cup, but most of those tickets were freebie giveaways. Despite all that, the Stallions went into Regina and got a 37-20 win over Calgary to make them the only US based team to win the Grey Cup.
While the expansion experiment brought in some much needed cash to the CFL and improved the player pool a bit, the league ended up dumping all the US based teams in 1996. To make up for their departure, they returned to Montreal with a revived version of the Alouettes. Former Stallions owner Jim Speros and GM Jim Popp were put in charge of the Als. This is sometimes labeled as a relocation of the former Baltimore team but that's not 100% accurate. All the US based teams were exempt from the import ratio quotas that the Canadian teams have had for a long time and still have to this day. The Stallions players were all declared free agents and the Alouettes managed to sign about half of them, including Ham, Payton and running back Mike Pringle (although they had to wait a bit on him since he had an NFL tryout with the Denver Broncos) while a makeshift expansion draft was done to supply Montreal with some Canadian content.
Even with that over with, the CFL still had problems. The Ottawa Rough Riders could barely make payroll thanks to their constant string of ownership and management problems and they folded after the 1996 season. The BC Lions went broke for the second time in less than five years and would've folded as well had David Braley not stepped up to buy the team. Stampeders owner Larry Ryckman had legal issues when he was found guilty in a stock manipulation scheme. The Stamps were put into receivership where Sig Gutsche bought the team and fixed their financials issues (until he sold them to Michael Feterik in 2001 which led to a massive gong show of problems in Calgary. I don't want to go back down that road right now, thank god John Forzani came to the rescue in 2005). Saskatchewan had to go down the telethons road again, Hamilton was still on unstable ground until Bob Young bought the TiCats in 2003, Toronto's ownership remained a revolving door until MLSE bought them in the 2010's and Ottawa's return to the CFL with the Renegades in 2002 was plagued with the same problems that killed the Rough Riders (with the Gliebermans making another appearance) until the CFL pulled the plug on them in 2006. (thankfully the RedBlacks have been run fairly well since their debut in 2014)
Even the return of Montreal had some turbulence in the beginning. The Alouettes were a good team but couldn't draw any good crowds at Olympic Stadium. Speros sold them to Bob Wettenhall in 1997 but the attendance issues got even worse and they would've bit the dust if not for a strange scheduling conflict. They were set to face to face the BC Lions in the East Semi-Final (thanks to the league putting in the cross-over rule) but a U2 concert was scheduled for the Big O that weekend and the Als had to find a different place to play. Molson Stadium on the campus of McGill University (where the first version of the Als played from 1954 to 1967) would be the site and drew a bigger crowd for game that then they had all season. This was due to the fact that it was closer to downtown and the Big O has a well earned reputation of being a dump. Molson Stadium remains the home of the Alouettes to this day although Olympic Stadium got some limited use for playoff games and Grey Cups from 2001 to 2012.

I got the chance to watch an early showing of How To Blow Up A Pipeline and thought it was great. The best part of this adaption is that it does not try to sugarcoat or make its message palatable to a larger audience.
If you don't know, HTBUAP is a radical environmentalist manifesto that essentially argues for directly sabotaging major industries responsible for climate change. It can be a very hostile and conflicting read as the author argues for smaller acts like letting the air out of expensive SUVs or keying gas-guzzling cars.
The film and book are not for everyone. Most people would find the suggested tactics wrong and immoral; if you read the book, the author knows it and does not shy away. I respect that the film does not stray from the book's ideology. It does confront some of the obvious questions that arise from an ideology like this. While some may find it a shallow debate in the movie, the story sets these characters up as already so far down their path that the conversations would be this clear and dry.
And that's what I mean by it being a radical film. It does not try to justify itself to anyone. It is not a conversation. It is a call to action like the book it's based on. Some will find this unappealing, and I understand why, but it's refreshing to me when most apolitical books can't even get adaptions that respect their source material or change things for mass appeal.
As a story, it's structured as a sort of Ocean's 8 but with a young and diverse cast of eco-terrorists, breaking up their operation with flashbacks showing how they were all pushed to the point of eco-terrorism.
The characters could've used more development and depth, but the actors all feel so genuine in their roles that the cast works. Specific shoutouts to Forrest Goodluck, Jake Weary, and Ariela Barer, who all wring out every drip of character they can in the limited time on screen.
The cinematography bounces between these breathtaking landscape shots that set up the conflict between nature and polluting industries and handheld shots that feel like they were done by a Vice camera crew following around a real ragtag group.
Finally, the score for this is so well done. It's subtle enough and understated to not take over scenes, but its synthy electronic score builds the tension during some of the most stressful moments.
TL;DR It's an adaption of a manifesto, so go in expecting a manifesto.

My bf and I own our home in our mid 30s with no children. We have a partial in law suite in our backyard. One giant room detached from the house. A year ago we let a friend of my best friend move in to the suite since he was working and moving from his aunt's house which was 45 mins away, to be closer to his job about 10 mins away from our house.
We both hit it off right away, he's 33 gay male. I like to drink, however I had a DUI in the past. It took me about 4 long years to get myself back on track. So now when I drink, I do it in the comfort of my home knowing I'm not driving anywhere. My roommate on the other hand has never had a DUI and constantly drinks and drives. He gets off work and immediately buys a tall can and hides it when he gets home. He's employed as a night auditor at a hotel. Which require very little job duties. About two months ago he was hired at Tesla and had to start working very hard, however he also kept the night auditor position one day a week.l.
Within the last two months, he's developed carpal tunnel in his wrist from Tesla, that was giving him so much pain. He told his supervisors to change his position but because he's still in the probationary period there is not much they can do. Over this past weekend, my family was invited to a quinceanera we all knew about it for about a month. I invited my roommate when we found out about it and he let us know he has to work.
On the day of the quince, he woke up about 12:30 in the afternoon and asked "hey do you want to have a shot before I leave to work?" I said no and asked him if he wanted to go to the store to help me find a dress for the quince.. he immediately starts complaining, "oh the quince is tonight?? I want to go". When we get back home, he continues to drink before he leaves to work.
About 830 that night we're sitting at one of the tables watch the birthday girl do her traditional dance, my roommate calls "hey are you guys still at the party? I just got off work because of my hand and I'm heading over there now." Our mutual friend lives across the street from the party. I go and talk to her about how he's leaving work just to make it to the party, when he walks into her house. Eyes glazed and bloodshot. I told him I was so disappointed in him for leaving work and sacrificing a job just to party.
The next morning I'm still pretty pissed but he walks in the house acting like nothing is wrong. So I brush it off since we have plans later that day to take his niece and my little sister roller skating. The girls are both 9. He leaves for the day and meets me later that day at the roller skating rink. Around 5 pm. He shows up with a girl who is a relative of his by marriage but is also a drinking buddy of his with his niece and the girl's step daughter, who is also 9. We all get our skates on and head to the floor.
He steps out on the floor and immediately falls and smacks his head. So in a rage, he throws off his skates and tells me how stupid roller skating is and starts crying. He and the girls go out and sit in the car. I wait about 20 minutes and go check on him... He's in the car with a bottle of alcohol and I tell him that's why he fell down. Drinking and skating don't mix. He sits in the car for the rest of the session while the girls are having a blast skating. When it's Time to go, he just tells the girls let's go, without telling anyone goodbye. Then he comes back looking for a pair of shoes acting very delirious. I told him he should go to the hospital or let the other girl drive and he ignores me.
After skating, I call our mutual friend again and tell her his behavior. She tells me that he's already called her complaining about his head and how it hurts how he's driving on the freeway thinking of pulling over and calling 911. But he also wants to know where she is at and what she is doing. She's at the laundry mat. He might go over and meet her there instead of calling 911. I go home and am by far exhausted by his behavior. Then he calls me. I ignored the call and he texts me that he might not have a job and he's going to start moving his stuff to his aunt's house. I ignored him because he's not in the right state of mind to discuss a decision that big.
Yesterday I'm stressed all day knowing a big conversation is coming. I called our mutual friend again and. She's doesn't answer. But she's texted me. That is a sign he went to her house telling her his side of the story. My bf was at home and saw our roommate and said "hey I need to talk to you" and he brushes him off and says "wait until she gets home" (me). And he immediately leaves the house. I come home and I'm stressed and upset. I don't want to live with a person who keeps going on binges. My bf finally calls him and tells him to come home and talk to the both of us. Our mutual friend, mind you, starts telling me that its all a miscommunication that the roommate doesn't want to be told what to do and that's why he wants to move out. And that her "mediator fee is $25 per hour". Completely making me the bad guy.
The roommate comes home and immediately says"I don't know what I did wrong?" What did I do?" My bf tells him first of all you're drinking and driving with kids in the car. And the conclusion is that he he was overwhelmed with Tesla and wants to quit so instead of dealing with that and making plans to quit and get back on schedule at the hotel, he decided "fuck it I don't want to deal with it" so he went on a drinking binge. And left Tesla drunk and was so drunk and delusional he didn't show up at the hotel for his shift either. Am I the asshole for calling him out on his shit? Because he and our mutual friend made me out to be this asshole that is "telling him what to do" and it's "none of my business".
Sorry for the lengthy post and thank you for hearing me out and letting me vent... Ugh.

The building which I will be moving to offers the option of purchasing a parking pass for the Grand Circus underground structure. I am wondering if anyone has any experience with this structure – good, bad, or otherwise – that they would be willing to share or feel that others should know about.
Mostly just curious as I try to find a home for my vehicle but I have heard of some (usual?) safety concerns and was wondering the extent to which that is a problem. Encounters with sketchy individuals I’m sure can be limited by avoiding the garage overnight-ish or by walking with another individual – it is what it is. I’m more concerned with vandalism – is there any notable reputation for vehicles being damaged while parked there?
I realize that it’s a pretty common spot for parking downtown. I drive a beater so I’m not too concerned with someone side swiping my car or really any cosmetic damage. My concern is more so with repeated broken windows/stolen catalytic converters/etc., things that require a bit of money address.

I 17(ftm) had moved to a new area within my state and had made a friend (16f) at the bus stop who also lived at the same apartment complex as me.
Sorry this is a bit long
She was always complaining about her home life and how she was treated and one night had called me while she was downtown to see if I was able to come get her, me 16 at the time who just recently got a license and knew downtown was confusing asked my mom who then picked her up and she stayed the night, fast forward and she was placed in my moms care and my mom adopted her and at this point she was showing her true colors, now shes been with us a year and I absolutely cant stand her, me and my mom live in a two bedroom apartment and when she first moved in we shared a room, well I couldn’t stand her so I started sleeping on the couch and then she started complaining about my stuff being in the room we shared so my mom eventually gave her the room she was in and now me and my mom share a room, she’s constantly saying how she cant wait for us to get a three bedroom and she wants us to move somewhere cheaper (where we live is more on the expensive side and my mom lost her decent paying job due to my health reasons and having to constantly leave), she is a total slob and only helps out if told to, she used to treat her dog poorly and eventually said “im done with him”, she gets into other peoples business and tells it to people who are involved wether it be big or small, claims to not have had 18+ acts with guys but we have found pregnancy test in her room and she has talked crap about me to my mother while sitting right next to me, she had also one called my family s***ty after having a fight with my cousin, has stolen from my mom and her sister, I have a feeling she has stolen from me,she was expelled from her school for skipping class and vaping,she has bullied my friends and classmates to the point they cry and then laughed at them for it and had bullied a teacher, she no longer goes to my school(i go to a charter school for really bad social anxiety)there is more but this is already pretty long

Hello everyone,
I rented a Sharetoo car for the past weekend, everything went smoothly and today I was shocked by the e-mail from the company stating that I made 2 damages on the car, and they expect me to cover the expenses of the damage that I didn't do. There is a lot of weird things from their side (photos of the damages on the car are not taken on the parking spot where I parked, which means someone was driving after me, on the application it is stated that I returned the car on completely different location, which is not true) and I am trying to prove that the damage was not caused by me. The only photo of the car that I made after I returned it is on their system, clearly showing where I parked, but it still worries me a little that one of the main evidences that I have is in their hands.
I wrote 7 e-mails to them today, but there is no reply whatsoever. I am curious whether there is some kind of consumer protection association that can help me in this case and what are the steps that I should take to resolve these false claims?

My 2012 Acura TL shows a “battery charge low” signal only when I turn the car off. I recently took it to Acura and they said I had a bad AC relay, my battery was replaced 5 months ago and alternator a year ago. Is this an issue?

Thank you for reading this. This marks the end of the last two days, that is when I chose to go back home after a year and a half of not seeing them, after the crazy shit that went down last year. My likely naive hope was to set the roots on my end for a healthy familial relationship (not that I had much of a taste for it right now, but to throw a bone and scout the waters). The more I was away, the more they pushed with my whole folks and it's holding my progress forward back.
I'm a 25M, only child of immigrant parents of the old-fashioned traditional variety from Eastern Europe. I grew up most all of my life in Ireland. I have ADHD and ASD (also heightened anxiety and depression) that I've inherited genetically and childhood trauma (from infant abandonment temporarily to overly strict disciplinary action at my mother's hand - her OCD and self-image driven perfectionism, being her emotional toilet, project and punching bag. This continued in force till the present day).
I grew up only with the bare necessities as they saved everything with greater costs afforded to education and good clothes so I wouldn't shame her (mostly so with how controlling she was). I had my books for company and comfort for a long time. I was forced to work under her wing at 15 alongside school.
Long before the 3rd of Jan 2021, I was feeling very sick and disillusioned with my home situation and the state of my life and future, especially as I had to live in their house during COVID. Mum did whatever she wanted and used all the typical covert tactics when I later tried to state my needs, or my dad tried to approach her, to get us both in a position to make her "happy." Yesterday she even freely said that she agreed with her therapist that she used me as a surrogate husband, yet with no real remorse. Still, with the help of a uni friend (someone with good experience of maternal abuse) helped me plan my escape and I left with a long letter of explanation on the table.
The reaction in the first two months of '22 was crazy. Trying to force the police to bring me back, then disclose my address, she threatened suicide multiple times, guilt-tripping, love bombing, trying to buy my return, empty promises. In February I dealt with actual physical violence and death threats from my dad and the above. I was being double teamed with my mum on the phone. They called it an "emotional" moment yesterday. When no contact started, they moved to coercion through my extended family and their guilt-tripping and subtle threats, then eventually hiring a private investigator to find my new address, something they freely admitted to the other day, which they saw no issues with. When I told her I'm going no contact, she jumped to "I'm going to have to adopt a child now, I always wanted another child." She didn't.
I broke no contact only at Christmas and New years and that contributed to the loss of my relationship as well as eventual night terrors due to both things and my delressio . So I saw them again for the first time last Saturday! Mum insisted on meeting 1-1 first. A complete denial, lies and lack of understanding about anything on her part, and the moment I questioned her about the PI she went hysterical in the car (basically anything she perceives as an accusation makes her go mental, then she goes into a panic attack). She then began having a panic attack driving on a motorway, where I had to try and calm her. For 15 minutes, I wasn't sure if I was going to die. It was horrendous.
About that, with our short dinner yesterday, she says she does it all the time (which now makes me question if her "anxiety attacks" are fully involuntary). She barely acknowledged my feelings in it when I shoved it in her face. She's so wrapped in herself that she doesn't give a shit about me or even my empathy for her and the both of them. She might technically have a personality disorder, it's possible, but I still want to be more secure and confident in my movement forward. It's her I'm more wary of. She's the director, my dad is just the tool and enforcer though they both don't consciously realise it.
So my dad wants there to be an "understanding" between us and a "normal" relationship. He only got teary when it came to admitting his guilt through gritted teeth, but he said himself it was for his own catharsis. He said mum's health is important at the start, and he gave me his word (which I recorded) to my exact terms that he would never break my privacy again (he personally often did in the past, not so much her) or make me feel unsafe. He seems to agree to the conditions I set to him. She was asking multiple questions throughout as if she didn't understand (I really don't think she did, to her she saw blame and accusations in everything). My dad enjoys coddling her, so I know she won't stop using him. She said in the car she's afraid of being alone and that I need to help her. And she did say she didn't trust anyone. There's so much more to it, which I can expand on.
Right now I want to be more confident in myself, stop listening to her voice in my head and carve my place in the world. I want to build healthy relationships and feel like what I'm doing is meaningful. They keep asking over and over if I need help, and it's statedly conditional on the fact that they expect me to help them with that they need. Obviously there's a balance, but isn't that when there's a healthy level of mutual respect? Plus, I need to practice working with my boundaries and stand up to myself. I'm currently getting mental and professional support. I've come a huge way since the start of last year and I'm not the same person (I'm proud of what I've achieved), and I don't want that to go to waste. Frankly, I'm happy I shocked them with how unrecognisable I was. Night and day difference, they said.
~~~ I don't trust them of course, but to someone who's given folks that second chance after a narcissistic reaction following your first real show of independence, what can I expect? What happened to you and what advice would you give to a first-timer like me? Also with how to deal with the serial flying monkeys this time (the grandparents) and the more reluctant ones (my aunt).

so to simplify things as much as possible, a few months ago, I caught my girlfriend sexting multiple people, after she denied it over and over again for months and called me paranoid and a million other names. Finally I gave in and went through her phone to find out that I was right about everything. Once caught, she admitted everything and that the validation she was getting from these people is what she wanted, because she is deeply insecure, and has other issues. Being that I know her history, I gave her a second chance. Naive maybe, but I decided to try it, due to my feelings for her.
Anyway, since then, things have been decent, but today we got in a big fight. This morning she called me as we were commuting to the gym, and she started talking about a tv show she is watching, where a woman got a hold of her boyfriends phone after he dropped it during a concert and she looked through it. My girlfriend stopped there and said “you guys should hook up, you’re exactly the same” referring to the fact that i looked through her phone. She then continued to say that the woman found sexual texts and a recorded video of her boyfriend and another woman masturbating to each other.
So immediately, my mind goes to what I found and saw on her phone, since it was almost the same exact thing. My tone changes considerably, and she picks up on it, and says “what? Because I said you guys should hook up?, it was a joke. You’re being sensitive.”
I explain that it isn’t funny, and I’m trying to forget about what happened, so why does she continue to bring it up?
She says that the conversation is “stupid” and finally says “sorry for hurting your feelings, but I don’t want to talk about this anymore. This conversation is raising my blood pressure.” And cuts me off.
We finally meet at the gym, and she gets in my car expecting everything to be normal and trying to hug me and act like nothing happened. I’m still upset, so I make a comment back saying “ you and the guy on the show should hook up, you’re exactly the same “ in reference to the comment she made earlier, and all of a sudden she starts crying, saying I’m an asshole, mean, rude, etc. So she leaves and our plans for the day were ruined.
since then she’s called me rude, childish for making a comment back to her, and an asshole for hurting her feelings. I tell her that I’m the one trying to talk, but she cuts me off, and having a conversation is always on her terms, even though I’m the one who is bothered. She continues to say that I’m an asshole “bringing her down to my level” and other comments.
Is there a even a point to continuing this?
She has a good way of making me feel like I’m in the wrong. I didn’t want to make her cry or hurt her. All I wanted was her to look me on the face and sincerely apologize, without me having to ask for it.

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