What's going on?

A recent Reddit policy change threatens to kill many beloved third-party mobile apps, making a great many quality-of-life features not seen in the official mobile app permanently inaccessible to users.
On May 31, 2023, Reddit announced they were raising the price to make calls to their API from being free to a level that will kill every third party app on Reddit, from Apollo to Reddit is Fun to Narwhal to BaconReader.
Even if you're not a mobile user and don't use any of those apps, this is a step toward killing other ways of customizing Reddit, such as Reddit Enhancement Suite or the use of the old.reddit.com desktop interface .
This isn't only a problem on the user level: many subreddit moderators depend on tools only available outside the official app to keep their communities on-topic and spam-free.

What's the plan?

On June 12th, many subreddits will be going dark to protest this policy. Some will return after 48 hours: others will go away permanently unless the issue is adequately addressed, since many moderators aren't able to put in the work they do with the poor tools available through the official app. This isn't something any of us do lightly: we do what we do because we love Reddit, and we truly believe this change will make it impossible to keep doing what we love.
The two-day blackout isn't the goal, and it isn't the end. Should things reach the 14th with no sign of Reddit choosing to fix what they've broken, we'll use the community and buzz we've built between then and now as a tool for further action.

What can you do as a user?

• Complain. Message the mods of /reddit.com, who are the admins of the site: message reddit: submit a support request: comment in relevant threads on /reddit, such as this one, leave a negative review on their official iOS or Android app- and sign your username in support to this post.
  
• Spread the word. Rabble-rouse on related subreddits. Meme it up, make it spicy. Bitch about it to your cat. Suggest anyone you know who moderates a subreddit join the coordinated mod effort at /ModCoord.
  
• Boycott and spread the word...to Reddit's competition! Stay off Reddit entirely on June 12th through the 13th- instead, take to your favorite non-Reddit platform of choice and make some noise in support!
  
• Don't be a jerk. As upsetting this may be, threats, profanity and vandalism will be worse than useless in getting people on our side. Please make every effort to be as restrained, polite, reasonable and law-abiding as possible.
  

What can you do as a moderator?

• Join the coordinated effort over at /ModCoord
  
• Make a sticky post showing your support, A template has been created here you can use or modify to your liking, and be sure to crosspost it to /ModCoord.
  

Thank you for your patience in the matter,
-Mod Team

Long post so please bare with me 😆 For context I am neurotypical (I assume) and she is diagnosed with ADHD and takes medication intermittently. We are both 22 years old. I am finishing college and so is she, but from what I know she is planning on dropping out and working instead. We are now broken up.
It all started a few weeks ago. Everything was normal between us, no fights or anything. She even said I love you that day (she doesn’t say it often so it’s extra sweet when she does). Then all of a sudden, the next day, no chats. She always had a habit of disappearing from our chats (we only see each other once a month), usually for a day or two, so I wasn’t that much worried at first. I thought to myself “Oh maybe she wants some alone time, I can respect that”. So I continue sending messages on our private discord server so she knows I’m here to support her and am waiting for her with open arms. I send memes, good mornings and good nights, and other stuff to possibly cheer her up. Normally, she’d reply the day after and fill me in on what happened and how she’s feeling. But this time there was nothing. So I waited another day. And another. And another. I even texted her saying I’m here for her, I’m worried, and just text me back when she feels like it. Next thing I know it has been a week already and of course I am worried SICK. She has NEVER gone this long without chatting me.
A little over a week, maybe 9 days of no contact, she sends me one message. It said that she’s “sorry for dissociating, she was job-hunting and she’ll get back to me but she can’t stop the momentum now”. It gave me mixed feelings, to be honest. Of course I was ecstatic that she was okay, and even more so that she’s finally progressing after being in a long “slump”. At the same time I was sad, because I was so worried, so anxious for her for more than a week and her nonchalant message made me feel like I was overreacting to her absence. But I cheered her on and wished her luck, because I was genuinely so happy for her. I thought to myself, “I’ll express my emotions when she’s free, because right now she needs to focus on her job applications”.
And then the next day she sends me another message. She has a job interview near my university tomorrow and she can visit me after class. I literally jumped from my seat when I read that 😆. We chatted for a few minutes and I said we could have a picnic. I’ll borrow a picnic blanket and bring some snacks for us. She said okay! Obviously, I got so excited. I even wore all my new clothes for our picnic. The next day comes, and while I was in class I received a message. She wanted to cancel our picnic because she didn’t consider how long her interview would be, and she asked to reschedule our picnic two days after. I was devastated and I asked her if we could push through because I already had plans the day she requested, but I understood that her job interviews were much much more important. It wasn’t her fault at all.
Two days pass, and she hadn’t replied at all. It was already the day she wanted to reschedule so I messaged her to just send a text if she wanted to meet, because I’ll just be nearby. I wished her good luck on her interviews and all, still no reply. I try not to be smothering and only send her 3-4 messages a day. I knew she probably wouldn’t reply, but a part of me was hoping that she would and that our picnic date would go through. It didn’t, and I ended up returning the picnic blanket to my friend. When I got home in the evening I told her I missed her and that we should talk soon, but still, no reply.
By this time, I was so frustrated, because I’ve been seeing her sharing memes and commenting on Facebook posts while absolutely ignoring my messages. I know I shouldn’t hold a monopoly on her time, and she deserves to spend it on what she wants, but at least send me something to soothe my emotions? Or literally send anything at all, even just a good morning. I had expressed my emotional stress in my messages throughout her “absence”, so I was hoping she’d give me literally any words of affirmation. She had said back then that I should speak up when I felt neglected, and she would drop everything to cater to me, so that’s what I was trying to do for so many days to no avail. But STILL, I knew it was an important phase in her life, jumpstarting her career, so I gave her some slack.
However, I could not go on at the expense of myself. I felt so detached from her, so unworthy of her attention that she couldn’t even spare me one second of her day. The next day I messaged her on Facebook so I’d be sure she read it. I told her that if we didn’t talk later that night, I would assume we were through. Just an hour later I realized I was being too rash, so I messaged her again to take back my last message. Instead, I told her that I would send her a long message and I would give her a week to think and process her emotions about our relationship moving forward. In this duration, I would not send her messages and leave her to organize her thoughts. Sure enough, she read it, but she didn’t send a reply.
I sent her my long message later that night. I told her that I loved her and while I recognized her efforts and was proud of her starting her career, I could still not accept the neglect that she had made me feel in those past two weeks. I knew that she was probably hyperfixated and focused on job hunting, but knowing that doesn’t really take away from my emotions. I told her we should work as a team in managing her ADHD symptoms so that it doesn’t affect our relationship. I made sure to be appreciative and loving to her in the text, since I understood that she might be apprehensive if I was too hostile. She read this message a few hours later but alas, still no reply.
I waited a week just as I had said, still no reply. I just could not take it any more, and with what little self-respect I had left, I sent her a breakup message. I told her how hurt I was that she would not give me the bare minimum, and how I didn’t want to beg for her love, or even just a glance from her. I mean, I am her boyfriend. I don’t think one message a week is enough. I really thought she would say her goodbyes when I sent my breakup message, but she didn’t, she just read it. That’s what hurt me the most, that she would just let me walk away without even talking to me for one last time.
It’s been a week since I’ve broken up now, and I still love and miss her. My question to you ADHD women out there, was I too harsh? Was I lacking in understanding? Was it a “me” problem? Is it normal for ADHD women or ADHD people in general to ignore their partners for days/weeks? I want to be fair to her as much as I can, since she’s already got a lot on her plate managing her ADHD. And while I know my ex-partner’s ship has sailed, knowing your opinions might help me in my future relationships, and my understanding of ADHD in general. Thanks!

...and I'm not happy to be here, but also, glad to find this group.
Awaiting my biopsy but I know, and the dermatology-specialising GP knew, straight away that I have 'subungal melanoma'. What I don't know is if it appeared overnight, like it seems to have, or if it's been hiding for weeks? Months? Years?! So... I wait. Appointment 'within two weeks' apparently, it's been two days so far. But thought I'd just say hi. I'm going back to lurking now until I have anything interesting to say.

Hey, I’m a pretty experienced in dosing, but never have done it 2 days in a row. Usually when I microdose, I’ll do 2-3 doses throughout the day, spaced 3-4 hours apart. Works great for me. I was curious if anyone has any experience with this, and with doing it two or more days in a row. Share your experience? Thanks

​
Quote:
​

What's going on?
A recent Reddit policy change threatens to kill many beloved third-party mobile apps, making a great many quality-of-life features not seen in the official mobile app permanently inaccessible to users.
On May 31, 2023, Reddit announced they were raising the price to make calls to their API from being free to a level that will kill every third party app on Reddit, from Apollo to Reddit is Fun to Narwhal to BaconReader.
Even if you're not a mobile user and don't use any of those apps, this is a step toward killing other ways of customizing Reddit, such as Reddit Enhancement Suite or the use of the old.reddit.com desktop interface .
This isn't only a problem on the user level: many subreddit moderators depend on tools only available outside the official app to keep their communities on-topic and spam-free.
What's the plan?
On June 12th, many subreddits will be going dark to protest this policy. Some will return after 48 hours: others will go away permanently unless the issue is adequately addressed, since many moderators aren't able to put in the work they do with the poor tools available through the official app. This isn't something any of us do lightly: we do what we do because we love Reddit, and we truly believe this change will make it impossible to keep doing what we love.
The two-day blackout isn't the goal, and it isn't the end. Should things reach the 14th with no sign of Reddit choosing to fix what they've broken, we'll use the community and buzz we've built between then and now as a tool for further action.

​
View Poll

Hey, I’m a pretty experienced in dosing, but never have done it 2 days in a row. Usually when I microdose, I’ll do 2-3 doses throughout the day, spaced 3-4 hours apart. Works great for me. I was curious if anyone has any experience with this, and with doing it two or more days in a row. Share your experience? Thanks

You've probably heard of Reddit's plan to effectively kill third-party apps, forcing users to use Reddit's official apps. As a university-centered subreddit, we strive for creativity and accessibility. Reddit's new changes will kill those ideals in the pursuit of profit. Those with disabilities and/or impairments will effectively be shut out from Reddit entirely. Their tactics of slandering third-party app developers (claiming they're threatening to hold apps ransom) is unacceptable. Reddit does not care about its users.
Reddit relies on unpaid volunteer moderators to curate content and keep the site in compliance with laws and regulations. We as moderators processed 10,000+ actions on content in this subreddit in the past twelve months alone, most of which are using third-party apps. Reddit's native moderation tools are abysmal. There is no way to keep up with the hundreds of tutoring spam bots, hazing posts, involuntary pornography, ban evaders, and law enforcement inquiries without third-party apps.

We are joining thousands of other subreddits in locking the subreddit beginning on June 12th. The duration is currently set for two days.

Demographics: Asian Female, Large Public High School, Queer, lower middle class
Intended major(s): Public Policy and Computer Science (specifically Data Science)
Academics: SAT: 1560 Class rank: school only does unweighted GPA so I am unfortunately 48 UW/W GPA: 3.99 UW / 4.48 W Coursework: AP world, AP calc AB, AP comp sci, AP English, AP us history, AP physics, AP calc BC (next year planning on taking: AP statistics, AP gov/psych, self study AP politics, AP english)
Awards:
1). won international app pitch comp (worked with software engineers to develop application centered around the intersection of public policy and app development)
2). Microsoft rising CS award in my State
3). NCWIT awardee x2
4). Regional voted best singles tennis player 3x
5). Won scholarship for activism work
6). national Yale essay competition #1 winner
7). awarded embolden scholarship for entrepreneurship
8). Top 16 in state for tennis and 2nd in district
9). Outstanding Woman Award in School District
10). Pi day top 100 women in STEM
Extracurriculars:
1). Founded Student Led Computer Science Organization that is Policy Driven - created 15+ code.org approved curricula for middle school students, consistently works with 5 schools across state, led and organized a group of student lobbyists to advocate for CS education, wrote bill that is being sponsored by state rep to get CS into every school in state. started district wide program for a week of code
2). Winner of international app pitch contest, pitched a public policy / public health app and ran a large social media campaign reaching over 5M people. Led college students to develop the app. Collaborated with Software Engineers from SAP and Kode with Klossy and coded and self published app on app store. Blue Ocean Competition top 100 w/ Transparent.
3). School Board Rep - position on multiple committees, led the first ever AI/Mechanical Engineering equity policy in district, organized focus groups, led student organized survey collection process, founded and run two subcommittees on district (equity council and youth advisory board). started peementorship process, created a credit for future student reps to make a meaningful impact, created the policies for long lasting student impact
4). City Council Student Advisory Board Founder - co founded first student advisory board in city, work with city council to draft policy, lead the policy development of council, hired consultants and lead training sessions with prospective advisory board members, run board instagram account
5). Climate Action Club President (participation all four years of high school) - organized and lead club meetings, organize projects such as state wide climate conference, waste reduction policy in school that reduced hundreds of plastic in upcoming years, led fundraising efforts (1000+), partnered with local community college to start scholarship program
6). Varsity Tennis Captain (2 years): #1 on team since freshman year, qualified for state every year, top 3 in districts every year, lead fundraising, organize bonding, design team clothing, lead team trainings and conditioning
7). National Youth Activism (MLK principles) Advisor - was a scholar for two years learning non violence activism, eventually was hired to be a mentor to teach scholars around the world on activism projects, attended National Activism projects, spoke at and organized webinars
8). International Non Profit Instructor Assistant: paid data science instructor for young girls around the world, led 2 week sessions, organized scholars, taught curricula, facilitated projects, handled communications
9). Lobbyist - student lobbyist for lobbying group in state, lobbied multiple times for Education, Transportation, Special Education, Free Lunches, organized Lobby days with multiple lobby companies across the state
10). Internship at Capitol in DC - recommended by state senator to intern with U.S. Senator, basically carried around papers for a week, got to meet VP, speaker, learned about National Gov Process
​
Schools: (by priority)
TOP CHOICE: stanford
going to apply to all ivies except for dartmouth, georgetown, UW CS, NYU, northwestern, JHU (legacy), MIT, Wellesley, duke, USC
Question/Comment: I've seen a lot of posts online saying that regular decision is easier than early. Should I apply early for stanford or early for yale and regular stanford?

Hey, I’m a pretty experienced in dosing, but never have done it 2 days in a row. Usually when I microdose, I’ll do 2-3 doses throughout the day, spaced 3-4 hours apart. Works great for me. I was curious if anyone has any experience with this, and with doing it two or more days in a row. Share your experience? Thanks

Today 4 years ago he died.
When I was a kid my mom was nowhere to be seen most of the time, she was high. My step father was abusive piece of sh!t in all sorts of ways but I don’t want to talk about it. The light of my life was my older brother Dylan (4 years older). He always protected me even if he got beaten to h*ll for it. He was always there for me, and basically raised me. It’s with him I felt so safe and warm. He made me smile. He made me feel loved and worthy of love. He was always there to help me and guide me and make me feel confident and comfortable. He always cheered me up when I was down. He was everything. I love him, I love him, I love him so much, I could write it a thousand times and it wouldn’t do it any justice. I love him. I really really really love him. And I wish he was still here.
I don’t want to tell too much of my background but long story short there was some legal ppl involved and so my mostly absent mom made it out that she was a victim of domestic violence (it was a whole freaking thing but it didn’t matter because Dylan was working with some attorney towards becoming my legal guardian after he turned 18 and we planned to move to America together)
Obviously she (mom) had no proof of assault the first time she made the claim so there was a case opened but my father was not arrested or anything. And he got super pissed.
I was 13.5 and Dylan was 17.5 at that time.
My father shot Dylan 2 times.
At the hospital they inserted a tube into his nose to try and suck the blood out of his stomach, and operated on him, but there was some problem of infection and they said he died peacefully but I know that’s bullshit. he died slowly as sh!t and suffered for so many freaking hours.
He did not deserve to die like that. HE DIDNT FUCKIN DESERVE TO DIE LIKE THAT. I want to scream and scream this until everybody knows. HE DID NOT FUCKIN DESERVE TO DIE LIKE THAT. He deserved to go out in real peace, not in pain. He deserved to finally live his life to the fullest. Visit Alaska and snowboard and join dance classes. And put makeup on because it made him feel pretty and confident. He deserved to have a girlfriend that loved him and adored him and a family. And he would have been the most amazing father ever, and I would have been the fun aunt to his kids.
And I… don’t I deserve to have him here with me? Don’t I deserve a little happiness as well after all that sh!t we went through?
After Dylan and father died Mom and I proceeded to move to America, at first we were at the crappiest apartment ever and honestly I was busy crying everyday to notice what the f was going on but then she found some widower surgeon (Thomas) to marry and we moved in his huge ass house.
Thomas was actually alright. But he wasn’t much at home. He had two kids, Mary (my age) and Jackson (1 year older). Mary and Jackson were nice as well. They introduced me to many ppl at school when I just came. But to be frank I was so incredibly jealous of Mary because she had Jackson and I didn’t have Dylan. Lmao I’m still jealous. And back then I used to in secret hate Mary’s guts and tried getting Jackson to fight her and hate her because I was being dumb. I hated her with burning passion when her only “crime” was that her brother was still alive. I grew out of it tho.
My mom died of overdose last year and so I am left with Thomas, Mary and Jackson. In the end he’s (Thomas) a pretty good dad even though he’s working long weird hours and Mary and Jackson are good too. Jackson is actually at college so it’s only Mary and me.
I’m a little over 17.5, which was the age Dylan was when he died.
I have good grades, good friends, I live in a really nice place. I got the newest phone and I got accepted into a really really good university for electrical engineering.
If I dare being sad I get shut down immediately by everyone. “Your dad is rich” “you’re hot/popular” “your grades are good” “you should be grateful for your life” “how could someone like you be sad?”
But honestly? I’d give it all away. Everything. Literally EVERYTHING If I could have Dylan back.
There’s isn’t one day I don’t think about him, I miss his hug, I miss his smile, I miss his voice, I miss his idiotic jokes and sad attempts to cheer me up. I miss him so much. I remember one time he tried on a skirt he bought secretly when our dad wasn’t home and I wish I could tell him again how much he rocked that skirt and how badass he looked. I still have that skirt btw. And you know everytime I see it in my closet I kind of pick it up and hug it and I smile but also it makes me so fkin sad. That’s one of the only things I have left of him. I don’t have any pictures of him at all, and It’s making me crazy. Sometimes I wonder if he actually existed or maybe my memories are false. Sometimes I want to scream until I pass out.
It’s like there’s this huge hole in my heart that nothing can fill. Actually not a hole, half my heart is missing. Literally. Nothing can help it. Not Thomas. Not Mary and Jackson. Not my friends. Not my boyfriend. This void will never be filled. It’s like I’ve been stuck in a nightmare for 4 years and I can’t wake up. I’ll never wake up. Dylan will never come back to me.
Even thinking of saying that he’s looking at me from the sky and I should make him proud and that he’d want me to live my life and be happy without him makes me sick. I just can’t cope with the fact that he’s gone. I can’t. Sometimes I have nightmares and right when I wake up I think about going to Dylan for a hug and then I remember that I’m alone. No matter how many friends or boyfriends or expensive cloths I have or anything. I’m always so freakin alone. I can be at a party surrounded by ppl and lights and I’ll still feel like everything is miles away and I just stand in the middle of nowhere in the darkness and I’m just waiting for someone.
In case anybody asks, I am going to a therapist, I’ve been going for a year because Thomas thought I’d be needing it after mom died.
It doesn’t matter how many hugs I get from my friends. And how many times I talk to them (they don’t know anything but they know my mom died). It will never bring Dylan back.
I’m sorry for this long ass rant, but truly off my chest, I’d give my new family, the house, the cloths, the friends and the grades and my place at that university if it means I could have my Dylan back.
It’s gonna be so lonely today. I will visit your grave and talk to the headstone until it’s dark and hope you are somewhere out there and you can hear me. I miss you, Dylan. And I don’t think it will ever get easier living here without you.

44/f for about two weeks now, my feet, ankles and lower calves have been swelling - sometimes a lot. At first, it was just one foot and I thought it was because I was sitting on the edge of my bed a lot with right leg hanging down. Once I noticed it, I stopped letting it hang down and started to sit at my desk properly (I work from home and work on a laptop 8+ hours a day That's when i noticed both feet swelling. Called my doctor within the first few days, but have been playing phone tag with them for a telehealth appointment, which I didn't think was sufficient anyhow in this case. But for some reason, I always get a text with very short notice that I don't see until it's too late. Finally got frustrated enough to go to urgent care yesterday, because the possible causes are pretty much all terrifying to me. The nurse practitioner I saw there won't win any awards for the most thorough check up. Basically, they weighed me when I walked in (it may be good to reveal here that I recently gained about 40 pounds in under 2 months time for no apparent reason and am now extremely overweight at 178 on a 5'0" frame), took my vitals (BP 147/82)and then waited for the NP. The only thing she did was listen to my heart and lungs with a stethoscope and pressed my leg to check for fluid. She determined that there was fluid, prescribed a diuretic (Lasik) and strongly urged a follow up with my PCC, which I will walk into on Monday morning, hopefully to be seen, but to make an appointment that I'm aware of before it starts. Also, I do smoke cigarettes and drink alcohol and am in recovery for a cocaine addiction (3 years clean, but weight is a trigger and im concerned about that at this point!). Also missed my period this month for the first time in what I believe is onset of menopause. Don't believe I'm pregnant because tubes are "clipped, tied and burned" for last 15 years, but the NP declined to give me a pregnancy test when I asked if she thought it was necessary. My question is what could this be? Is it emergent as I've described, or how will I know if it becomes emergent before Monday? I'm scared and would appreciate reassurance.

Me and my bf are in a ldr. When I was visiting him I also met his family for the first time. Because he’s in the military and lives in a different state. Before I even met his parents I kinda new that his mom had a problem with me but I don’t know why. At the beginning everything was fine. We even went on a little trip to the beach for 3 days. In the evening we decided to go in his family’s hotel room so we could all hang out together. It was me, his mom his sister and my bf. The das was in the grocery store. My bf laid on one of the two beds there. His mom immediately laid right next to him and so did his sister. I was just standing in the room. Hoods mom put his arm around him and started petting his hair. He put his head on her chest. While they were all cuddling together I was sitting where all their feet were. In the corner. No one talked to me. My bf was on his phone cuddling with his mom and I was sitting there like an idiot. After 15 minutes I had enough and decided to go back in my room. I know that my bf hasn’t seen his family in months but I’m still his gf. Why didn’t he cuddle with me or at least said come here or something? When I confronted him and told him that I found it weird he got mad at me. I do not know a Single guy who would rather lay to his mom on her chest than to cuddle with his gf that he hasn’t seen in 3 months. I was only there for 2 weeks and while the family was there I felt like a dog. He wasn’t lovey when they were around and barely even talked to me. And his mom called him “ my baby” a few times what I found weird too. The mom definitely has a problem with me and she’s that type of person who would say “you’re not good enough for my son”. What do you guys think of this? Do you think it’s normal that a 20 year old guy cuddles with his mom when his gf is there?

Okay so I don’t actually go to the gym I just do DIY stuff at home I am just looking to make friends with someone, preferably another girl, so we can lose weight and work on whatever body goals we have.
I’m 140 lbs, 5’6 and my goal is 120 lbs + bigger butt so I’ll be doing stationary biking, leg exercises/calisthenics, and yoga
I usually wake up early in the morning like 5-10am and sleep early like 8-10pm. Hopefully our timezones are close and you’re also a morning owl like me so we can brew some tea/coffee to drink and voice chat and talk about our day before we start working out.
I was thinking this could be a decent starting routine for us:
M-F no weekends: 60min cardio (any kind is okay, and walking is valid, I personally like stationary biking)
M-F + weekends: 30-60min yoga, I personally follow Yoga With Adriene, but we can watch other yoga YouTubers
M-F no weekends: 30-60min calisthenics/weight training so we can be more specific and say like 100 squats, 50 situps, 50 lunges, etc or we can do it by minutes. Up to you, or we can follow a training guide which I’m 100% down for.
And movies/shows - yeah I’m down to watch almost anything. Two shows on my watchlist are Scream netflix series and Euphoria. We could take turns on which movie or show to watch.

For context, our baby is 6 weeks old, and we’ve watched the 7 tips on Taking Cara Babies. TIA for any tips you may have!

1. as of now, we are keeping daytime naps to a 2hr maximum. Just paying attention to about when he falls asleep and waking him up 2 hours after. Depending on the day, those naps will happen at different time. Should we be using a timed schedule instead? For example, 10:00 nap, 12:00 feed, 12:30 play, 1:00 sleep, etc. I know he won’t always follow the schedule, but should we try to keep our times the same or base everything off when he naturally wakes up or goes to sleep?
   
2. If a nap is interrupted, do we still wake him two hours after his nap started? For example, falls asleep at 2pm, wakes up grumpy at 2:30, eats, goes back to sleep at 2:50. Do we wake him up two hours after 2pm or 2:50pm?
   
3. Yawning is a sleepy cue.. but sometimes he wakes up from a 2hr nap and then yawns almost immediately. Does that mean he should nap again right away and only have a 10 minute wake window, or should we ignore his first yawns and really wake him up first?
   

I (23m) was questioning my gender and recently thought I was trans for a bit. This past January I met a guy on tinder (25m) who I told day one I was questioning my gender and he didn’t seem to mind. We talked for two weeks, he visited me for two nights and then we talked for another two weeks before we had a conversation where I basically told him I was considering transitioning. We stopped talking in early February (because he’s gay and couldn’t date a trans woman). Well, recently i’ve been thinking I don’t really want to transition and be a woman after all, and just want to be more fem as a gay guy. Recently, I tried to catch up with the guy as well, my intention was just as friends, and I didn’t tell him yet that I decided to not transition. Well, he has a bf now which I didn’t expect to hurt so much. From what he said it seems like he started talking to his current bf right after him and I stopped talking, and he spends most of his time with him now. The conversation basically went:
Me: hey how’ve you been Him: I’ve been good, just doing an internship lately, hbu? Me: I’ve been good, you still at the same job you had before? Are you still living with your brother? Him: Yea but I’m rarely home now because I spend most of my time with my boyfriend.
And he went on to say that they met in early February (which is when him and I stopped talking), and became official in April. I feel kinda bad that he met someone else and became so involved with him so quickly, or like i did something wrong that this happened and I missed my opportunity with him due to the circumstances of me still figuring out my gender at the time him and I were talking. This is also my first time I’ve really had an ex officially date someone else (that I know of) which makes it feel worse. I’m worried about if I’ll ever find a guy as loyal as he seemed for example.

AITA for going No Contact with my mother?
So, I (28F) was raised by my single father. I have had a rocky relationship with my mother (59F) my whole life, due to drugs and alcohol and gun violence. She is incredibly volatile, and has alienated a majority of her family due to her volatility. I can include more of that in comments if folks would like some backstory. So, my father (M76) had been struggling with esophageal cancer for 2 years, and it was approaching hospice time. Where my mother had been horrible, my father was exceptional. He was an amazing dad. As good and kind of a man as you could possibly imagine. I was taking care of him throughout his cancer, but I put aside the crappy relationship with my mom and called her.
My mother came up immediately to help. My father had been living with me so that I could take care of him, so I took off work to do full time home hospice. My fiancee (27F) had quit her job to help out as well.
In order to shorten this a bit, I’ll have to leave out the drama where she started stealing my liquor. I didn’t know she was back to drinking, she had been sober. I have a normal relationship to alcohol, and thus didn’t think about hiding my liquor from her when she came over.
There was so much manipulation that it would be hard to include everything she did during the month she stayed with my father and I. It was an incredibly stressful time for all of us. I tried to have sympathy for her stress levels as well.
One night, we had a different nurse come by. She told us to put liquid pain meds under my father’s tongue, as his feeding tube wasn’t an option at the moment. At this point, my father was non responsive. He was clearly on his way out. The nurse being a medical professional, I listened. Unfortunately, this caused my father to cough and choke on the meds. My fiancee and I suctioned until he stopped, and he got comfortable again. I called the nurse and explained what happened. She came up with a way to make his feeding tube viable again and that was that. I felt very bad for having made my father cough, but I thought I was doing right, as that is what I had been told. My mother had absolutely zero medical experience, but was incredibly mad at me for not listening to her suggestion not to. I was following medical advice. He was okay after the nurse's mistake. I thought it was over with.
She accused me of trying to drown my father. She kept yelling that I was drowning him. My fiancee politely asked her to stop. She said “this is a really stressful time for all of us, and OP already feels really bad. Can you please stop, this isn’t helping”. Then she started freaking out and yelling at me over everything. I had some martini glasses and a bar mat out to dry after washing. Me putting those away after drying was apparently offensive to her. She screamed at me about not trusting her with medical stuff, and she’s right, I didn’t. She had fucked up the antibiotics multiple times, and gave a medication that was contraindicated despite the nurse specifically telling her not to.
She started to threaten to leave. She was screaming at my fiancee even more than she was at me. The last straw was when she was screaming, and I quote, “I rebuke thee Satan!” directly in my fiancees face. I told her to get the fuck out. She started packing her bags. We had been going through family photos on the couch and coffee table together, she made sure to snatch those first. Then she said I’ll never have photos of my father, and why didn’t HE have childhood photos of me?? (He did. They’re in a large box in my closet.)
Importantly, she left one packet of photos on the couch. I saw them, and, afraid that she’d follow through on not letting me have any photos of my father, quickly took photos of them with my phone. My fiancee then put them on the coffee table between two books. My mom came out of the bathroom accusing me of having stolen photos from the room. I said I didn’t know what she was talking about, because I didn’t. I hadn’t stolen anything or even moved out of the chair I was sitting in. When I realized she was talking about the photos she left behind, I gave them to her immediately. She continued to accuse me of theft. This coming from a woman who has struggled with drugs and alcohol and various crimes her whole life, to her daughter that has never once even had a speeding ticket. But I’m a thief apparently. A normal person would have simply asked if they left those ones out there, but she can’t possibly do that.
All of this screaming while my father is literally on his death bed.
She left after midnight, screaming at me for over an hour. Had she refused to leave I would have called the cops. The next day I calmly asked her to scan copies of the photos. She continued to try to hold them over my head as leverage. Eventually she did, and dropped the copies off.
My father passed a week later. I briefly spoke to her at the funeral. I hugged her, but didn’t accept any apologies. I haven’t answered the phone since. I sent a Merry Christmas text but that’s it. The calls aren’t as frequent now. I think she’s gotten the message. My half brother still tells me to talk to her. I have no desire to talk to someone who would treat me so poorly. I don’t care that she’s my mother. She’s had her own health issues lately. Heart surgery, her own cancer treatments. I don’t care. As far as I’m concerned, I became an orphan when my father died.
Am I being unfair to her? Should I give her another chance?

There’s a bubble tea festival at Swangard stadium. I see some tickets are on sale for $10 one day pass. The website says that you get special rewards or discounts at vendors but that’s vague. Did anyone go last year? Was it worth it?

there are so many posts about being an introvert or an extrovert, attractive or ugly and how it can get u bitches (˵ ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°˵). i feel like many people here might deal with social anxiety or awkwardness ( which i also did for two years) hence i wanna share how i overcome it.
1) smile, it will always help. now im not saying smile like a creep but just have a genuine happy smile going on. it radiates positivity and will yourself in a good mood aswell. it gives you a very approachable look. just imagine if a person is smiling during a convo w you and then there's another person who has a rbf( resting bitch face) with no expression, who would you like to spend time with more.
2) show interest in people's life if you are meeting someone for the first time let them do the maximum talking and ask them more questions. for eg- person a - yea that teacher is an asshole, he punished the whole class for one whole period
person b- omg why tf who he punish the whole class it doesn't make any sense
this doesn't just show that person b is interested in a's convo but also that they are listening to it very carefully which will make person a like person b more.
now the main question of some of y'all would be that how to initiate convos scenario 1- a classmate of urs, if you have any subjects in common you can always ask them for notes, hw, or in general to bitch about the teacher :D. try to sit with a grp of people and not somewhere alone in a classroom. surround yourself w more people and don't be afraid to make a fool out of yourself, you wouldn't remember them in 5 years. people care only about themselves not you.
IMP- collect data about your whereabouts. as in know the drama the gossip the tea or in general any kand that happened. scenario 2- a friend of a friend meeting for the first time- which stream/class r u in? oh i heard that teacher sucks/ that kid got suspended didn't he/ i heard A section walo ne pankha tod diya.
bas hogya chalo bye ily

Ok guys, what the heck is the actual standard on refills?? On our website it says any drink can be refilled as a tea, iced coffee, brewed coffee or hot tea. To my understanding that means that if you get an iced tea you could, for example get an iced tea refill or one of the other 3 options as a refill. But my coworker who is also a shift lead (I’m a shift lead lol) is arguing that no matter whatever the kind of drink someone gets, they can get any of those four options as a refill. 😑 They are interpreting it as, for example no matter the drink someone gets they could get a refill of one of the four, so if someone ordered a latte or a Frappuccino they could get a refill of an iced/hot tea or a hot/iced coffee, but that literally doesn’t make any sense to me.🙄 I feel as though the “standard” for this can be interpreted two different ways considering online it doesn’t specify whether or not it means just those four options or all the options on the menu. What have you guys been taught or believe to be correct?? From what I know, you can only get a refill of one of the four options; those being interchangeable refills, but not any drink being able to be refilled with one of the four options🤔. Curious to know what your guys’ thoughts are on this debate.