The gas giant loomed large in the viewport, ballooning as the ship coasted toward it, the colorful blue hues of its swirling bands reflecting the glow of the system’s star.
Darren could make out the bright, scarred surface of an ice moon drifting lazily past, framed against the rivers of flowing hydrogen and helium. Silhouetted against the Jupiter-mass object was their destination – Halfpoint Station.
Having come from Earth, which was still a backwater when compared to many of the Imperium’s more developed worlds, the sheer size and grandeur of the structure took his breath away.
It was hard to gauge its true scale in the vacuum of space where there was no atmospheric haze, and there were no landmarks for reference, the unfiltered light creating harsh shadows. As they drew nearer, however, he was able to pick out some of the massive fuel tankers that swarmed its ports like clouds of gnats.
Those vessels put anything created by Humanity to shame – their purpose being to dip into the upper atmosphere of the gas giant, harvesting its resources to fuel the ships that made their berth here.
Calling it enormous was an understatement. It must have been nine miles tall, the main hull of the station forming a long, relatively thin vertical shaft. Surrounding that shaft were half a dozen rotating rings, each one connected to the central column by spokes, the pinpoints of innumerable windows glinting as they slowly turned.
At its apex was a dome of immense proportions, sitting proudly atop the structure, the crystalline material that made up its transparent hull glittering in the starlight. Inside, he could make out glimpses of regal skyscrapers and patches of parkland – an entire city encapsulated in a habitat that had a breathtaking view of the planet.
Darren pursed his lips as he looked down at the device on his wrist, the tiny display showing the familiar text of an article he must have read at least a dozen times by this point.
Halfpoint Station was situated on the outskirts of the Imperium’s sphere of influence, a region of space known only as the Periphery. This put it soundly outside of Purp jurisdiction, but the place still saw a lot of traffic, as the station was right in the middle of a relatively well-traveled shipping route between the three big powers.
While it had started its life as little more than a place to fuel up and get resupplied, being located outside any of the major spheres of influence had its benefits, and the station had garnered a bit of a reputation for its more permissive policies. Now, it was said to be populated by hired guns, smugglers, gamblers, and anyone else who might appreciate discretion.
The Human frowned as he looked out the window once more and tried to reconcile the gleaming edifice before him with the dark reputation the article in his hands presented.
He didn’t have long to dwell on it before the pilot’s crackly voice came through a hidden intercom in the cabin, informing the passengers that they were commencing docking procedures.
The woman spoke in accented Shil. What that accent was, Darren had no clue, but he knew it wasn’t the same one spoken by his professors – linguistic or mechanical.
He glanced around at his fellow travelers, seeing a few species that he didn’t recognize, along with the more familiar Shil’vati. The aliens were easily identifiable by the purple hue of their skin, their sharp tusks, and their seven-foot height.
Several of them returned his gaze, some curious, some covetous.
Males were rare in the Imperium.
Hell, males were rare, period.
By the standards of most races out in the galaxy, Humanity were the strange ones for having an equal number of men and women. Even six years into the occupation, most were still struggling to adapt to the new paradigm brought on by that reality.
Darren was no exception.
Still, he managed to ignore the stares, turning his attention to the smart display on his wrist, bringing up his itinerary. He was headed to Hab-Ring Five, and the only information that he’d been given beyond that were some coordinates to who-knew-where.
He sighed, wishing – not for the first time – that he might have a fellow first timer to converse with.
Unfortunately, that was a pipe dream.
The lack of other Humans on his ship wasn’t surprising. The Imperium had only recently relaxed enough to begin authorizing travel visas allowing Humans to leave Earth, and his kind were still a rarity on the Galactic stage.
As to why he was out here out in the ass end of space?
He’d been offered a job.
He was an engineer by trade, at least according to his degree, and he specialized in the combination of alien and Human technology. It might seem like an oddly specific skillset, but it was one that was in high demand, as just about every industry on Earth was trying to take advantage of the opportunities provided by the Imperium’s literal space-age technology.
It was complicated work, but he was quite good at it, if he said so himself – and his professors seemed to agree. His gift had catapulted him through university and had apparently landed him a very lucrative offer to take up a position on Halfpoint.
How they’d heard of him, he wasn’t too sure. Nor did he truthfully know exactly what the job entailed. Apparently, he was to be briefed on-location.
Regardless, off-world work was a rare opportunity for any Human, let alone one fresh out of school, and visiting an alien space station was a lot more interesting than backpacking around Europe for a year.
Whatever happened, it was going to be an adventure.
The ship matched velocity with one of the rotating rings, the structure at least half a mile tall in its own right, covered in tiny windows that made it look like a whole city block had been condensed down into the shape of a donut.
Now that he was a little closer, Darren could see that the station was actually far from pristine. Its hull was pocked with haphazard repairs, the newer sections shining brighter than their older counterparts, its armored panels pitted with little craters from space debris and micro-meteorite impacts.
The ship lined up with a docking port, and an umbilical walkway began to extrude from the ring, reaching out towards them. It looked like the jib of a crane, covered over with a flexible material that bore a suspicious resemblance to a grey tarp.
Surely it wasn’t actually a tarp? No, it had to be some kind of alien supertech – too advanced for him to recognize at a glance.
Right?
His thoughts did little to reassure him as the umbilical connected to the shuttle’s airlock with a tangible thud.
Shaking his head, he retrieved his travel bag, then made his way down the aisle to join the queue of passengers who were waiting to disembark. More of them crammed in behind him, and he tried to ignore their uncomfortable proximity.
He hadn’t actually spent a lot of time around aliens during his schooling. One of his professors had been a Shil, but she had been professional to a fault and had always kept a healthy distance from her students.
Of course, she had still managed to be rather intimidating despite that, her head seeming to scrape the ceiling every time she stepped into the classroom. However, Darren was rapidly discovering that being surrounded by women who stood head and shoulders above him was a different experience altogether.
It was nothing to get worked up over, though. He just needed to-
The Shil standing behind him pressed close – uncomfortably close – Darren swearing that there was room enough in the aisle for her to keep her distance. Suddenly, he felt a sharp twinge in his rear.
Had she just...pinched him? No, it had to have been a mistake.
He turned to glance over his shoulder, looking up at the towering Purp. “Sorry, Ma’am, I must have bumped into you.”
Her sly smile faded as she furrowed her brow in confusion. Before she had time to formulate a reply, the intercom above the exit beeped.
“Oh, looks like we’re moving again!” Darren chimed as he began to follow the queue. “Sorry!”
He followed the procession of towering women into the passenger ship’s airlock. Both of the pressurized doors were open, and before him stretched the umbilical. The worryingly thin material that protected them from the deadly vacuum of space was wrapped taut around a metal frame, and the walkway beneath his feet was made up of a simple grate.
After a short walk, they emerged into a cavernous dock area, so large that it was more like standing in some kind of indoor stadium than anything that could be compared to a space station. There were stacks of shipping containers and unidentifiable machinery everywhere he looked.
It was a challenge not to stop and examine the equipment, each new sight piquing his interest, each strange device begging to be investigated. As he followed the other passengers to the far end of the room – his head on a swivel – he almost bumped into one of the containers. To his surprise, it was floating a foot off the ground, suspended on an anti-gravity cushion.
It was funny – no matter how many times he saw it, it never stopped being surreal to see something just…float.
As he stooped to look beneath it, an irritated dockworker leaned out from behind it to yell at whoever was in her way. She stopped when she saw him, raising a skeptical eyebrow. She was a Rakiri, if Darren remembered correctly. She resembled a towering werewolf, a pair of cat-like eyes peering out from beneath her black fur, her facial features strangely leonine. She was clad in dirty, yellow coveralls that hung loosely from her broad shoulders, exposing the ragged tank top that she wore beneath it. Tufts of her dark coat poked out around the faded garment, giving her a surprisingly fluffy appearance.
“You lost, boy?” she asked as she shooed him out of her path. “Stay behind the yellow warning markings unless you want to get that cute butt smushed,” she added with a nod toward the deck. She continued to push her heavy container, moving it effortlessly on its gravity cushion.
More dock workers were assembling to stare at him, perhaps having never seen a Human before. Or perhaps it was because he was male? It was hard to tell. Either way, a small crowd of yellow-clad women saw him off, a couple of them hooting at him and waving. Not sure if this was some kind of alien greeting, he shyly waved back, eliciting laughter from them after a moment of surprise.
One started to make her way over to him before a menacing growl from her superior made her freeze in place sheepishly. Darren took that as his cue to move on – he didn’t want to get anyone else in trouble by being in the way.
He arrived at a security gate, and after being asked to show his visa, he was subjected to a very thorough – and in his opinion unnecessary – pat-down. Once he was cleared, he emerged into the station proper. He stepped out of the way of the women behind him, then set his travel bag down on the metal deck, taking in the alien sights and sounds for a moment.
Far from being a sterile, clinical environment, he found himself in a bustling bazaar worthy of any city back on Earth. It scarcely felt like he was standing inside a station at all, what passed for the ceiling so high above his head that he could barely make out the crisscrossing support beams and maintenance catwalks.
It was styled like a cramped street, too small for cars, almost like the city center of some old European town had been reimagined in an industrial style. Civilian quarters that resembled apartment blocks rose up towards the ceiling, connecting to it in some places, likely leading up to higher levels of the station.
In every nook and cranny – anywhere there was room – the denizens of the hab-ring had set up little stalls where they were hawking their wares to the tourists who had just boarded. Colorful awnings fluttered in the artificial breeze from the air recyclers, and insulated cables that had been patched from the station’s systems trailed along walls and floors, powering streetside food stands and colorful neon signs.
Speaking of the denizens, they came in all shapes and sizes. Darren had never seen so many varieties of alien in one place before. He could make out a few Shil and Rakiri, but most were unknown to him, the varied hues of their skin and clothes creating a bustling sea of color.
He checked the device on his wrist again, pulling up the coordinates that his new employer had forwarded to him. This was indeed Hab-Ring Five, and he’d been given what passed for an address in this strange environment. Hefting his bag once more, he made his way into the throng, having to dodge and weave between the towering aliens. Many of them barely seemed to register his presence, probably due to his comparatively small stature, though some seemed to stop and stare in confusion.
Well, I suppose Humans are pretty new on the galactic scene, he thought to himself.
The scents of strange, alien food assailed him as he navigated the cramped streets, a few of the criers singling him out. They had sharp instincts, he’d give them that. It seemed the locals could smell a tourist at thirty paces.
Maybe it was all the staring he was doing?
Eventually, he arrived at his destination, glancing up from his display to see a dingy bar. It was open to the street, built into an overhang at the base of one of the many buildings, little more than a long counter with a few stools. Above it was a blinking neon sign in a script that he couldn’t read. As he made his way inside and struggled up onto one of the tall stools, the small handful of patrons who were sitting off to his left paused their conversation to examine him.
They were Nighkru, their goat-like horns and the bruise-purple hue of their skin giving them away. Their silver eyes were striking, almost seeming to glow in the dim light of the bar, as reflective as those of a cat. Their clothing was all tight leather and straps, their skin strategically exposed in places to show off their stunning bioluminescent tattoos, the swirling patterns trailing down slender limbs and across toned midriffs.
He kept his gaze aimed forward, knowing that their kind didn’t think much of the Imperium to which he now belonged.
…Then again, that was true for pretty much every race that wasn’t a part of the massive interstellar empire. Say what you would about the Purps, but they knew how to make an impression.
The bartender walked over to him, leaning on the counter as she looked him up and down skeptically. It was another Rakiri like the dockworkers, her feline nose twitching as she took in his scent.
“You lost, or do you want something to drink?” she asked.
“No thank you, I’m waiting for someone,” he replied sheepishly as he lowered his eyes to his device again.
He was right on time, but as he looked around, there was no sign of his contact. He was supposed to meet them here, right?
The Rakiri shrugged her furry shoulders, then left him to his own devices, moving over to the small group of Nighkru.
Perhaps one of them was his contact?
He certainly hoped not. While he didn’t have anything against a person enjoying themselves with a good drink after hours, it wasn’t a good way to make a positive first impression on a prospective employee.
Fortunately for him, the surprise on one of the trio’s grey skinned faces when she happened to blearily peer in his direction dashed that possibility. Just a trio of young women out for a drink.
Unfortunately for him, after a few hastily whispered words to her friends, the group made their way over to him.
“Don’t see many males round these parts,” one of them said, her faux leather getup creaking as she planted her hands on the bar to his left. Another leaned on the counter to his right, the third posting up behind him.
“A Human, too,” the woman to his right added with a sly chuckle. “Now, what’s a Human doing all alone out on the Periphery?”
“I didn’t think the Purps were letting their pets off the leash.” the one behind him snickered.
“I don’t know,” the first said with an exaggerated shrug. “Maybe he snuck out in search of a real woman? I think we’ve all heard how Humans can be.”
That set the three of them laughing.
All the while, Darren wasn’t sure where to look, turning his head left and right as he struggled to pick a Nighkru. He settled on the woman to his left, having to lift his head to meet her gaze, those reflective eyes shining like a pair of silver coins.
“I...uh...was actually supposed to be meeting someone here.” he stammered, a little of his anxiety bleeding through.
The Nighkru gave him a warm smile that wasn’t reflected in her eyes, leaning a little closer. He tried to pull away reflexively but found another Nighkru waiting for him, something rather soft pressing against his back.
“Well, I don’t see anyone else in here but me and my friends,” one of them said as she tutted dramatically. “Maybe they stood you up?”
“Poor form, that,” the one behind him whispered into his ear. He lurched in his seat, surprised by her proximity. “Leaving a pretty young thing like you hanging.”
The first one nodded, as if that was a piece of sagely wisdom. “I know – how about my friends and I give you a personal tour of the station to make up for it?” she asked, reaching out to brush a piece of errant fluff from his collar. “We’ll even carry your luggage for you – we’re nice like that.”
She signaled to one of her compatriots with a curt nod, who then plucked his travel bag off the deck.
“Oh, that’s really not-”
He tried to stand, but he was cut off as two of the women placed their hands on his shoulders, pushing him back down into his seat. Their touch was gentle, but firm, letting him know that he wasn't going anywhere.
Darren looked to the Rakiri bartender for help, feeling more than a little overwhelmed by the turn of events, but she was staying out of it. She was feigning disinterest, cleaning a glass with a rag that didn’t look clean enough for the job.
It was clear that he wouldn’t be getting any help from her.
Was this really going to be his first experience on the station – kidnapped by a gang of alien grifters?
Just as he was getting ready to – likely ineffectually – start swinging like his life depended on it, he heard a voice ring out in a language he didn’t recognize.
The Nighkru turned their heads as one, and he followed their gaze, seeing another of their kind step in from the street. Her skin had the same twilight hue, her silvery hair pulled back into a long ponytail that trailed behind her as she strode towards them. She wore a jet-black body suit that left little to the imagination, so tight that it might have been sewn onto her, the garment open at the front to expose a chiseled midriff and the beginnings of her cleavage. Her eyes were mesmerizing, his gaze drawn to the glowing tattoos that served to accentuate them.
Oddly, unlike the trio surrounding him, she had no horns.
The stranger walked with purpose, her heels clicking on the deck, her hair swishing behind her as she came to a stop to stare down the three other women. They were already backing off, the Nighkru who had taken his bag setting it back down gingerly beside his seat. Did they know this person? They seemed so wary of her.
“Maybe we’ll see you around,” one of them whispered, her hand lingering on his shoulder for a moment before she followed her friends out into the street.
Once they were finally out of sight, Darren breathed a sigh of relief and turned to thank the newcomer. Before he could utter so much as a word, she beat him to the punch.
“You shouldn’t wander around Halfpoint alone,” she said, skipping the preamble. Her voice had a melodic tone, one that was almost musical to Darren’s ears. She planted her hands on her hips, scrutinizing him with a skeptical expression. “You’re just asking for trouble.”
“I’m just...waiting for someone,” he replied. “Thank you, by the way. I’m-”
“Do you have a weapon on you?” she asked, cutting him off. “A handgun under that jacket? Defense spray? A pocket knife?”
“What? No,” he replied, his brow furrowing. “Why would I have a gun?”
Even with a few inches of titanium-alloy plating between everyone aboard and a messy death by explosive decompression, using a firearm on the station seemed risky.
She snorted derisively, almost as though she couldn’t believe his reply.
“For your sake, I hope that whoever you’re waiting for is smarter than you are,” she said with a roll of her silver eyes. “This isn’t Earth, boy. There are no Shil Marines around to babysit you. Next time you want to play tourist, go somewhere closer to home.”
With a flick of her long hair, she turned about, vanishing into the crowd once more to leave him sitting at the bar in confusion.
Darren felt another hand on his shoulder and turned to see an Edixi wearing grease-stained overalls standing behind him. The tool belt that hung loosely about her hips let him know that she was a mechanic before she’d even had time to open her mouth.
Her kind were evolved for an aquatic environment, and although they were fully amphibious, they retained many of their ancient features. Their bodies were smooth and streamlined, with lean, lightly-muscled frames that made them look like Olympic swimmers. Her eyes were a striking ocean-green, and her azure skin was patterned with faded tiger stripes, darkening as it neared her extremities.
“You’re the new engineer, right?” she chirped excitedly.
“Darren Fogle, pleased to meet you,” he confirmed as he extended a hand. She took it, shaking it eagerly, and he noted that her fingers were webbed.
He was a little surprised by how smooth her skin was. Given the sharklike appearance of the Edixi – and her vocation – he’d expected it to be rough and scaly. Maybe cold and slimy, too. By contrast, it was warm and soft, her small scales smooth like a snake’s rather than sharp like those of a fish.
Odd.
“Oh, it is. It very much is. The boss told me to fetch you,” she said before turning back towards the street. “Don’t get lost, you hear? There are some rough types around these parts.”
Yes, she could say that again. He stooped to pick up his bag, then hurried after her, trying not to lose sight of her in the crowd. He also belatedly realized that she hadn’t told him her own name.
Was that an Edixi thing or was she just in a hurry?
The mechanic led him through the streets, which seemed to be arranged in a kind of grid pattern, always flanked by the towering hab-blocks. It was as challenging as ever to navigate when so many of the station’s inhabitants stood a head taller than him. It made him feel like a bug that was trying to avoid being stepped on.
He could only assume he’d get used to it. His guide seemed to have no problem getting around, and she was a few inches shorter than him.
Their destination was some kind of service elevator – a large platform that seemed designed to carry heavy cargo up from the docks, wide enough that a couple of trucks could have parked on it side by side. There were still a few cargo containers stacked off to one side that hadn’t been unloaded yet.
He watched as the woman hit a touch panel beside the double doors, and they began to slide shut, the platform lurching as Darren felt it start to rise. There was no grinding of machinery, no vibrations, only a sensation of getting heavier. It was obviously gravity-manipulation tech. It wasn’t too surprising – the Shil seemed to use it for just about everything, so it wasn’t too strange that the rest of the universe did as well.
Convergent technological development, he could almost imagine his Shil instructor saying as they started to descend. Good tech is good tech.
The hab-ring’s many levels flashed by one by one, until finally, the elevator slid to a smooth stop. Darren followed the happily humming mechanic out into a garage, his eyes lighting up as he took in his new surroundings.
Were those… mecha?
The bay’s walls were lined with bulky harnesses that were obviously designed to hold the machines in place, a few of the berths already occupied by half-disassembled vehicles.
They were!
“Real life mecha,” he mumbled.
As a mechanic, he wasn’t ignorant of the genre. After all, what kind of engineer didn’t hold a soft spot for giant stompy robots? Of course, as an engineer, he also held an inherent disdain for anyone that actually thought said machines were even remotely practical outside of the realm of fiction.
The Square Cube Law was a harsh mistress.
The long and short of it was that if you doubled a machine's height while keeping it the same shape, you ended up with four times the muscle power moving eight times the mass. As a result, instead of having the same relative agility as the original, the double-sized machine actually had only half.
That was why ants could lift so much relative to their weight. If you scaled one up, you’d end up with a much less impressive power to weight ration.
And, the problem only got worse the bigger you went. Giant robots would be slow, cumbersome, and they would inevitably suffer from exploding ankles if they tried to move too fast. They’d also sink in just about any terrain that was even slightly porous.
All in all, mecha were a cool concept with absolutely zero real world applications.
Which was why he was so stunned to see some in real life. Sure, the Shil military liked to use exos, but they were really just power armor by any other name with thrusters attached. Besides, the only reason those things could skip around like they did was because they had anti-grav generators…
His thoughts trailed off as an idea occurred to him. He jogged over to the nearest machine, peering up at the twenty-foot humanoid monstrosity. Its legs had been detached, leaving only a bulky torso covered in half-stripped sensory equipment, lenses and scanners visible where their protective covers had been removed. The cockpit was open, revealing the pilot’s seat, along with the surrounding neural interface cables that hung loose like the entrails of some mechanical beast. Its weapon attachments were empty, but it was nonetheless an awe-inspiring sight.
Sure enough, there were two oversized humps on the back. One was clearly for the thing’s fusion engine – and the other must have held the anti-grav generator.
“Darren?” the mechanic asked, having only just realized that he wasn’t behind her. “Aren’t you coming?”
“Y-yeah,” he said, jogging for a few paces to catch up. “That’s a mecha!”
The blue-hued alien nodded slowly. “Yes?”
“A mecha,” he reiterated.
Which prompted another slow nod. “You’ve never seen a gladiator mech before?”
“No.”
“Didn’t they tell you what job you’d be doing?” the mechanic asked, cocking her head in a rather adorable manner.
“No?” This time it was his turn to cock his head.
Several emotions seemed to fly across the alien’s face. He saw surprise, confusion, and dismay before she finally settled on irritation.
“Typical,” she grunted. “Just… follow me.”
AN: https://youtu.be/a3Xp1WhRQ9Q

Take $5 off for each additional item purchased. Chat preferred. Everything's always "OBO", feel free to hit me up via chat (worst I can do is say no!)
Mostly looking to sell, but always willing to look at trade/partial trade offers. Current interests:

• Hinderer junk that a sane person wouldn't touch with a 10 ft pole made out of the gold required to afford it
• Full Track would be nice? Full Track for some scales?

Prices are all PayPal F&F (no notes!!!) and includes shipping (USPS, USA-only, USD currency). Ships out via USPS whenever I feel like it. Eh, super busy all weekend so probably Tuesday. Purple Monkey Dishwasher. I'm away from the internet intermittently -- and honestly probably going to sleep for 12 hours right after I post this, so apologies in advance if I don't get back to you for a long-ass time.
Thanks for looking!
A note on the Meton Boss scales:

By design the Meton Boss scales have recessed lock bar access, making the the knife easier to close (huge improvement!!!). Some makers will also do this for you if ask them nicely. Like my buddy Jeff -- he'll Dremel you some lockbar access no problem! Hit me up if you want his number, but don't mention the Jets to him or he'll talk your ear off. He only accepts cash or cigarettes though, none of this Venmo garbage. My wife's always telling me to Venmo people she's buying junk from on FB Marketplace. Man, my bank doesn't even accept that shit -- talk about cash advance fees up the butt! $30 for a set of clothing hangers? A USED set of hangers? I don't care if they're felt, thats nuts! Banks just screwing you because they can. Anyhow, Meton Boss's frag scales are very reminiscent of the CRK Umnumzaan.

>> Timestamp <<
In honor of Easter coming up, I've scattered these all over like an egg hunt! Enjoy!

• XM-18 3.5 Kirkland Signature by R.C. -- Like new / not mounted. SV 69.42
  
• XM-18 3.25 pink frag gelatinated starch LEFTY by R.C. -- Like new / not mounted. SV 69.42
  
• XM-18 3.5 "Rainbow" frag titanium scale by Meton Boss (modded) -- Never mounted, heat anodized in some idiot's garage. SV 200.69
  
• XM-24 Extra Extra Extra Extra Skinny aluminum scale by R.C. -- Like new / not mounted. SV 69.42
  
• XM-18 3.5 Happy Birthday! scale by R.C. -- Like new / not mounted, but has "patina'd" brown. SV 69.42
  
• Jurassic "Dino Butter" Scale by R.C. -- Mounted and carried a dozen times. Mounts on a liner. Brass has a brushed look, but obviously the maker isn't that great at polishing. Hand-made in some idiot's garage. SV 175.69
  
• Eklipse Tactical Celebration Pfefferkuchen scale by R.C. -- Like new / not mounted. SV 69.42
  
• Jurassic g10 "cutout" OD green -- Yes SV 30.69
  
• XM-18 3.5 "Easter Sunrise" frag titanium scale by Meton Boss (modded) -- Unused/unmounted, heat anodized in some idiot's garage. SV 200.69
  
• CLONE XM-18 3.5 "High Quality Knife" scale -- CLONE, used, has a few mounting issues (but would be a great "project" scale). SV 69.42
  
• XM-18 3.5 "Oil Spill" frag titanium scale by Meton Boss (modded) -- Unused/unmounted, heat-blackened in some idiot's garage. Isn't 100% black, has a little splash of color (can kind of see it in the pics, its a bit like the oil slick zirconium). SV 200.69
  
• Eklipse "Pot of Gold" Scale by R.C. -- Mounted, carried about a dozen times. Mounts on a liner. Brass has a brushed look and (AGAIN) the maker obviously isn't that great at polishing. Hand-made in some idiot's garage. SV 175.69
  
• "Containment Series" Bundle by R.C. -- All of these have, uh, "patina'd" quite a bit. Used but not abused, kept in a nice airtight container. SV 420.69 XM-18 3.5 Contoured Nanner XM-18 3.5 Pasteurized Freedom XM-18 3" 2" Thin-Sliced Honey Hamderer
  

Free Add-Ons

• HEAD of a XM-18 3" copper scale screw -- came off when I applied my inhuman gorilla strength to it. Cannot be taken if you are also taking the screw THREADS.
• THREADS of a XM-18 3" copper scale screw -- I swear I barely did anything and it just popped off. Cannot be taken if you are also taking the screw HEAD.
• Hinderer Packing Peanuts -- Real and authentic from the Ranch! 6 available!
• Jurassic "Snap Crackle Pop" scale by R.C. -- Honestly still looking pretty good / edible! (DO NOT)
• Jurassic "NO-SCALE" scale by R.C. -- To hell with all these scales, man. This is true enlightenment.

We are pleased to inform you of more significant progress towards scientific understanding and awareness of Post-Finasteride Syndrome.
Upcoming scientific research: Opening a new line of scientific investigation
As you may have already heard, our first scientific study at The University of Kiel is already underway. The objective of these efforts is to uncover more pathomechanistic clues about the disease - a necessary step to gain a better understanding of why the findings of significant and widespread gene deregulation demonstrated by Baylor might be occurring.
To gain a complete understanding of this disease, however, we are now going to be looking into possible predisposition(s) to PFS. Today, we are announcing new research to support this objective, provisionally titled Investigating genetic factors involved in the development and onset of Post-Finasteride Syndrome.
Tampere University in Finland will begin investigating possible genetic factors involved in developing Post-Finasteride Syndrome. This research will continue building upon the important results from Baylor College of Medicine. These landmark findings demonstrated significant deregulation of gene expression in PFS patient tissue which correlated to observed biological differences in patients and their self-reported symptoms. While Baylor’s results indicate a what, we need to continue expanding into the why with more modern investigative techniques.
These efforts, combined with those already underway at The Institute for Human Genetics in Germany, hope to provide a more complete understanding of PFS, and why some patients experience persistent and severe health problems after discontinuing finasteride.
In this study, researchers will use a technique known as Whole Genome Sequencing (WGS) to analyse a cohort of PFS patients, looking for potential genetic factors that may predispose patients to developing the disease. This type of study has been clearly recommended as an appropriate next step by multiple publications, including Baylor College of Medicine. The aims of investigating possible genetic factors involved in PFS are:

• to understand the genetic predisposition to develop PFS
• to understand why some individuals are affected and some are not
• to prioritise genes implicated in the onset of the most common phenotypes

Understanding possible genetic factors involved in Post-Finasteride Syndrome could provide another path to accurate disease modelling in animals. Insights uncovered through research into patient genetics, along with potential insights from our existing line of scientific investigation, can contribute to establishing a disease model, with the objective of understanding the core pathomechanism and hopefully, an eventual target for precision medicine treatment of PFS. An understanding of the predisposition will also:

• clearly establish which consumers are at risk of developing PFS
• help clinicians diagnose PFS faster and more accurately

Specifically, this study will use WGS to analyse the entire genome of 150 PFS patients compared to a group of healthy controls. WGS in principle allows the detection of disease relevant genomic variants beyond the exome such as DNA structural alterations, deep intronic variants, variants in non-coding regions, or repeat expansions and may improve variant calling in homologous sequences. It represents a novel, distinct diagnostic tool that targets genes and goes beyond the coding region and allows elucidation of established and novel non-coding genomic diseases.
The researchers involved in this project are accomplished in their fields and have a genuine interest in the disease. After extensive consultation and collaboration on our previous project, they are also aware of the multisystemic nature of PFS and other key peculiarities involved. The supervising lead, Professor Alfonso Urbanucci, has previously published in Cell reports evidence that overexpression of the AR is able to drive genome-wide chromatin relaxation and gene expression alteration in refractory prostate cancer. Collaborative input will be provided by Professor Johanna Schleutker, an accomplished geneticist.
We again appreciate any support that patients, loved ones and supporters can provide. We understand the scarcity of resources available in our community and do not take any decision about the allocation of those resources lightly. This is a path that has been recommended by almost every researcher we’ve consulted with, including preeminent researchers operating some of the largest facilities in the world.
Generously, researchers involved have again offered their support at a heavily discounted rate. We will not be required to pay salary cost for the researchers involved, which makes what would usually be quite-costly far more palatable.
As such, we are setting a fundraising target of €200,000. This has again been supplemented by the generous donations that supporters have continued to make even after the Kiel study was funded. While €200,000 is the “breakeven” figure for the study, we must again remind patients that research is largely a chicken-and-egg scenario. The more funds available, the easier it is to begin new research when insights become available.
You can donate here: pfsnetwork.org/donate
PFS Network now a registered 501(c)(3) organisation
After many months of waiting, we are pleased to announce we have received 501c3 status in the United States. This means that all donations made from US tax residents are now tax-deductible. We believe this also means patients can retroactively make tax-deductible claims for donations over the previous years, but please check with a tax expert.
Patient recruitment
We will be prioritising patients who completed the patient survey on Propeciahelp for this study, in order of those most severely affected. If you participated in the survey, you will be receiving an email in the coming days with an invitation to participate. If you receive this email, please follow the link to the form provided. Once we have exhausted this list, we will also be asking newer patients to come forward. When you apply, you will be asked to provide a link to your propeciahelp member story or Reddit profile so we can verify your post history and when you entered the community.
Please do not email or reach out until we have asked for more volunteers. We do not have the manpower to manually sort through applications.
As this study will be conducted remotely, it is vital we validate each participant is in fact a patient. It will also add weight to the study scientifically. For this reason, we are prioritising patients who completed our patient survey. This does not mean that you will not have a chance to participate if you didn’t complete the survey - it is highly likely we will not have 150 responses from survey participants. This study requires 150 patient samples to go ahead. Control data will be provided by a data bank containing healthy controls that is frequently used for genetics studies. The material required will be a blood sample.
Collection can be done remotely, and will be managed by our partner Dante Labs, a highly-respected third-party company that provides sequencing services for large laboratories, hospitals and institutions. If you are interested, Dante will send you a blood collection kit via mail, which you will send back to their lab once complete. You do not need to leave your house to collect the sample and the kit is very straightforward to use. It will not cost you anything to participate.
Faces of the disease: New awareness campaign
After two decades, it finally feels like this disease is emerging from the shadows. While public accounts were sporadic in decades prior, in recent years we’ve seen a surge in patients speaking openly about the devastating effects of PFS. It is immensely encouraging that this is happening beyond our own efforts.
After much delay, we have begun releasing the second season of our patient interview series on our YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCQXyXbJNqxzjEhPp5RVI88A
We will be releasing one episode a month and we encourage you to share them widely, like and comment. These simple actions will help these accounts rank higher in search results on what is an important platform for awareness. Again, we are indebted to our five guests for their bravery.
Our group has consistently maintained that research is only one - albeit very important - path towards understanding and acceptance of this disease. Anonymous usernames on a forum can be easily dismissed, but real humans cannot. We encourage anyone interested in speaking out to come forward as we begin recording more episodes shortly.
This opportunity represents another significant step in bringing this disease out of the shadows. We hope you are able to support where possible.
Thank you again for your continued courage, PFS Network team

During the original broadcast, I didn't discover the Insiders Podcast until season 5. I'm doing a rewatch now, and listening to the Insiders Podcast after every episode.
I made similar threads for seasons 1 - 3.
​
From the 4x05 Insiders Podcast: Quite A Ride.
Cara Pifko (Paige) is a guest host.
* Breaking Bad was shot on film. Better Call Saul is shot in digital.
To help maintain the look of Breaking Bad, the teaser was shot on film. It's the first time on Better Call Saul that a teaser was shot on film.
However, the paper shredder scene was shot on the Red Dragon digital camera, because they needed the higher frame rate, so they could run it in slow motion.
The paper shredder was one of the last things they shot for the season.
They used some colored text on the paper, so the shot looks better. Otherwise, the shot was coming out too much in black and white.
* The set for Saul's office has been on storage since Breaking Bad. They took it out of storage.
* The teaser is supposed to contrast with who Jimmy states he wants to be, at the end of the PPD interview. We can see that he doesn't end up being the type of lawyer he wanted to be.
* Paige has done voices for several Mass Effect games.
She had to do some intimate scenes with a friend of hers, which was a little weird.
She has also done motion capture for a video game, that never got released.
For some of the motion capture, she says it's funny to hold a piece of wood, and pretend it's a gun. She likens it to a kid playing pretend.
* Paige is also doing online teaching acting for Emerge Media.
* It's very hard to bring actors from overseas. They need a work visa, etc.
The last time they did that was on Breaking Bad, when they had two Germans.
* They wanted a contrast between the two engineers. With the French one being composed. And the German one being very open, talking about how he took the dramamine, but it didn't work, etc.
The German's attention to detail, and honesty paid off.
While the French one is like someone who will say anything to get a job.
They also wanted a contrast with Mike's personality, with the German one.
​
​
From the 4x06 Insiders Podcast: Pinata.
Patrick Fabian is a guest host.
* Patrick Fabian explains the Jon Cryer thing. He referenced him in last season's 3x08 podcast.
So Jon Cryer allegedly wins the Malibu triathlon every year.
Fabian also says that Cryer won the triathlon, hosted the Emmys, and won an Emmy, during one of the years.
I still don't know which year he's talking about, as this wiki doesn't have Cryer as an Emmy host.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Pr...ceremonies
Fabian says Cryer might have peaked on that day.
* They wonder if Cryer's life is just an extended role of the Cryer movie, "Hiding Out".
* For the teaser, they like how Kim was prepared to show her legal knowledge to Chuck, while in the mail room, if she ever got a chance to meet him.
And they wanted to show how Kim admired Chuck.
Nothing flirty. It's smart, respectful, not second guessing him, but showing she's been thinking about the case.
* Chuck also tests her, by asking "what's the case"? He really already knows. And she knows the answer.
Chuck and Howard also want Kim to succeed, as they see her potential.
* The teaser also shows of when Jimmy falls for Kim. And when he thinks maybe he can be a lawyer.
* They also point out how Jimmy doesn't notice how condescending Jimmy is.
* Fabian says Chuck isn't condescending, he has a business to run. Not be an Oscars pool guy.
* It didn't really dawn on Fabian that Michael McKean wouldn't be an actor with him, until the first day of 4x01. He knew Chuck was dead at the end of season 3.
It just didn't hit him until they started 4x01.
* The name of the case, Isaacson v. Vakarian Holdings, Inc., is a fake case, with a reference to a video game. "Vakarian" is a character in Mass Effect.
The teaser takes place in 1993.
* Howard's "fuck you" to Jimmy has been a long time coming. Starting with the pilot, when Jimmy interrupted his meeting, and called him "Lord Vader", and ripped a check in his face, and tried to extort him.
* Gilligan is wondering how they allowed the F bomb.
They tell him they're not overusing their privilege.
And how they don't have all the characters constantly dropping F bombs.
* Fabian says between Jimmy telling him "you have a cross to bear" in 4x01, and the Kim scene in 4x02, leads to the disheveled bathroom scene in 4x06.
He was unshaven too.
* Cara Pifko (Paige) has known Ben Bela Bohm (Kai) from before. They are friends.
They were surprised to see each other on the set, as they didn't know they would each be there on the show.
Bohm was about to go back to Germany, and then this part came through, so he stayed.
* They had help from Bohm on how to make the German dialogue more conversational.
* Vince Gilligan is surprised they had to pay editor Joey Reinisch, to be the voice on the other end of the phone line, when Jimmy is on the phone at CC Mobile.
* They say the old Italian spaghetti western movies, pre 1980, would be shot with no audio, or with people speaking in their own language. And they'd add the audio in post production.
* For the pinatas, there's rules on how long the actors can hang upside down. They can only hang upside down for a minute 15 seconds at a time. The actual time is a little less, since it takes a few seconds to tie and untie them. The clock starts as soon as they are off the ground.
When stunt actors are used, the time allowed is expanded to 2 - 3 minutes.
This is all for safety reasons.
* They had to make the pinatas easy to break. So they could break in one hit.
* They bought up all of the pinatas from a several mile range, at that time. They feel sorry if anyone had a birthday or celebration during that week, since they bought up all of those pinatas.
* It's easy to pass out when upside down, and not know one is about to pass out.
* They kind of have to stop filming every 45 seconds.
* The upside down shots are only at the beginning.
* Patrick Fabian says to memorize your pocket dialogue (i.e. when the Germans are playing basketball; drinking beer; etc.)
He says treat it like regular script.
Because there might be a day where the director decides to film you up close for 50 yards, and if you don't know the pocket dialogue, and the cameras are on you, you'll never feel colder on the back of your neck.
Even if the pocket dialogue is in German, you still have to know it.

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Mirrors.
Our greatest fear.
There are no more anthropological demons.
Dark, predatory eyes no longer linger in the deep dark.
Winter doesn’t bring the paralyzing promise of starvation.
A needle, some gauze, and a little liquid removed terms like “blood fever” and "the sickness took him" from the lexicon.
The central nervous system is no longer powered by the night's terror and growls and disease and famine and war; it’s run on existential dread.
We bray, preach, beseech, and all scream, "apathy is the enemy!"
Why?
Because we felt ourselves jade, felt the soft lines of our hearts crystallize with cynicism.
And we want to save our children from the same fate we know, deep down, to be utterly inevitable.
You can't stop what's coming.
We, laughably, reasonably, and inescapably, are afraid of what we see in the mirror.
I am.
You might not want to come to terms with it, but you are, too.
Repulsed. Angry. Disappointed. Whatever.
Save me the thesaurus and just get down to the nitty gritty.
We’re afraid.
And we know that apathy spreads so easily, like a germ in an elementary school lunch room.
But let me tell you.
Don’t knock apathy.
Sometimes apathy keeps you from running that extra step and catching the leading bullet right in the temple.
Sometimes apathy is the time out from the moral puzzles that plague us.
Sometimes apathy is as close to Jesus as you get.
This is the story of how apathy saved my life.
At least, that's how you might see it.
I don't.
I’m not sure you would call of it much of a life.
Sure, I had a heartbeat, a pulse, and was one more clockwork orange spewing carbon dioxide out and stealing my share of the oxygen.
But that was about it.
I was trapped in the paradox of wanting to die fervently and being absolutely petrified of taking my life.
The mind; what a flawless design.
I don’t really want to bore you with my sob story.
Dead brother, health problems, no future.
If you are the sum of all your parts, if everything is shitty, aren’t you just shit?
I hadn’t left my apartment in weeks.
I decided to walk to a local bagel and coffee shop.
I didn’t want either, but I had to leave behind the stale air of my little hamster cage.
The prisons we build for ourselves are made of choices and regrets, and I needed a fucking walk in the yard.
That’s when I saw him.
The Stranger.
Have you seen The Stranger?
Have you met him?
I should hope not.
He was sitting at one of the fading cast iron café tables outside, the sort where the aqua green is slowly giving away to rust and the ugly underneath.
Like us, exposed for long enough, that mask just withers.
I stopped abruptly.
He looked uncomfortably out of place.
Everyone should have been gawking at him.
No one seemed to notice him.
Black cowboy boots with red roosters adorning the sides.
Black slacks, white dress shirt, black tie, black gloves.
Black beard and black hair under wide-brimmed black hat.
I almost snickered until our gazes locked.
Black eyes.
Pure obsidian.
Before I could utter a word, he was in front of me.
I never saw him move.
He held me by the throat, raised me up, his arm growing longer, and longer, and longer, until I felt myself growing dizzy from the thin air and the staggering blue of the sky and mist of the clouds and the scorch of the sun and –
And I woke up.
A blackened, dim room with a single dingy light bulb trying desperately to stave off the dark, like the rest of us.
It was cramped and there were five of us, including me.
In the middle of the room was a transparent glass square, an ominous cage illuminated by what little light was shed here in this dark little corner of the universe.
A single vial of impossibly red liquid lay next to a syringe inside.
I felt a stinging, deadened pain in my right arm.
Before any of us could utter any protestations, The Stranger was among us, speaking, words coming from every corner of the room, his dark visage and image disappearing and reappearing next to each of us, whispering echoes.
“Have you seen The Stranger?
Have you met him?
You have now.
All of you are worthless and undeserving of life.
So I have taken it…
…from four you.
You have all been injected with a poison.
My blood.
Have you seen The Stranger?
Have you met him?
In one hour, it will kill you.
You will rot from the inside.
You will vomit organs.
You will spew blood from your eyes.
You will shit out bones.
You are undone.
Have you seen The Stranger?
Have you met him?
You should have lived differently.
I weigh value.
I do not find you wanting.
I find you repulsive.
And that is so much the worse.
You live by my blood, you die my blood.
And you can live again by it.
Have you seen The Stranger?
Have you met him?
There is enough of my blood in there to save one of you from the blight in your veins.
Inject less than the whole and suffer the same fate as the rest.
Only one of you will live.
Have you seen The Stranger?
Have you met him?
You have now.
And you need his blood.”
And then he was gone, though the whispers lingered in the shadows, taunting and mocking.
I smelled piss.
It wasn’t mine but it was hard to miss that acrid scent.
I watched as my four fellow prisoners wailed incoherently, begged, screamed, impotently threatened.
Hands smashed against unbreakable glass.
I slunk to the floor, sliding out of the last reach of the light, dropping my head in my hands.
My right arm felt like dead weight, the gangrenous limb that would spell out my doom.
Every shift in my weight brought a wave of nauseating pain.
I’d finally found it. That horrible place where the Y and X axis of bullshit finally meet and cross over.
The place where you’re just too fucking tired to be afraid any longer.
I gave up.
Fuck this nightmare game.
The other four set about desperately trying to get into the box.
Quick introductions were made.
John, the pill popping firefighter.
Erin, the sex worker whose kids had been removed by the state.
Alexa, the borderline with cuts adorning her wrist.
Evan, the teacher with the ever-wandering eye. Maybe worse.
At least, that’s what I read between the lines of their half-truths.
They searched for links, argued, pushed, worked together.
They tried to think it out like this was a shitty Dan Brown novel or some 16th chapter of a gore porn horror series that should have had the decency to end.
I don’t know if they ever noticed me, or if they had simply forgotten about me.
I didn’t want to be a part of the world. This one or that one.
I sat in my little corner and waited for my Armageddon.
There wasn’t anything worth fighting for.
That’s when John made a mistake.
And so did I, I suppose.
He ambled over in the darkness, his vacuous machismo ridiculously parading for all to see, even at the end.
I felt myself lifted by my hoodie to my feet, having hardly been able to make him out in the dark.
“And what’s your deal, fa…”
I hit him with a direct jab in his windpipe with my left.
John had at least 50 pounds on me.
But I died a long time ago, killed off by a world of John’s.
And I never said I was a good man.
Far from it.
I had nothing to live for, but plenty to kill for.
John kept choking, hands intermittently clutching his throat and grasping at nothing, trying to find a breath that wasn’t there.
Do you let the half dead animal twitch to death in the street, or do you snap its neck in mercy?
You snap its neck in anger when it’s a piece of shit.
And it takes one to know one.
I screamed, sounding somewhere between a feral hog and a banshee, as adrenaline willed a dying arm to aid me in twisting his neck and putting him down for good.
At least there would be quiet.
I felt dizzy, woozy from the pain, and toppled over.
Somewhere in the deep dark, screams and shrieks.
“Fuck em,” I thought.
I had spent a life putting poison in my body, dooming myself, and I could feel The Stranger’s moving ever closer to my heart.
As the adrenaline wore off, I was beset with agony, the whole of my right side alight with pain.
Suddenly, silence.
“Look.”
Eric whispered and I saw what they were all staring at.
One of the walls of the square had begun to shatter.
In unison, the three begin frantically smashing the weakened glass wall to no avail.
John’s corpse lay inches from me.
I couldn’t tell if the piss was fresh from the kill, or if he’d been the one to wet himself from the get-go.
A chuckle left my lips.
I felt a bit of joy at either revelation.
And then he was there again.
Black hair, black wide brimmed hat, black eyes.
Have you seen The Stranger?
Have you met him?
Next to each of us, gone, reappearing.
Have you seen The Stranger?
Have you met him?
You have now.
“We…we have to kill each other to get into the box.”
Alexa whispered what we all knew.
“Ya think?” I muttered. “There’s only enough for one of us, anyway.”
Alexa ran her hand along the glass. “Maybe we could find a way to share it. Maybe we could…”
Evan began strangling her from behind.
Erica screamed, clawed, struck.
Nothing cleaved his desperation. She begged me to save her.
I wasn’t in the saving business.
Evan screamed like a boxer who finally TKO'd his better in the title bout. A bit much for a worm who’d snaked a girl half his size from behind.
There was a distinctive sound of glass slowly breaking.
The wall began to shatter even more.
Shards flew out, clunking along the hard, sightless floor.
Evan and Erica tried to smash through the square, sliced their fingers trying to reach through the small, oddly shaped holes where the glass had sprayed outward.
I dropped my head and my eyes back into my arms and knees and just waited.
Have you seen The Stranger?
Have you met him?
I could hear him, feel him, smell him, like sewage and lilacs and rotten milk and fresh cut grass, zipping around the room.
I heard the incoherent wails as Erica and Evan jostled and tumbled, a single ball of visceral flesh in the dim light.
Then there were no more words.
Just the sound of squishing and squelching.
Over and over and over.
I felt drops of wetness sprinkle over me.
Even in the pale of the tiny light, I could see Erica standing, like Carrie soaked in pig’s blood, a single thin shard of glass of held tightly in her left hand, slicing and drawing fresh blood to mix with the stew of the others’.
And he was there.
He was everywhere.
The Stranger gingerly ran a gloved black gloved hand across Erica’s cheek.
I felt him tussle my hair.
We heard his condescending laugh, his echoing whispers.
Have you seen The Stranger?
Have you met him?
“You have now.
And you need his blood.
Oh, you need his blood.”
And he was gone.
The glass square exploded, sending shards flying in every direction, slicing and dicing as they want.
Light exploded in the room, filling every corner.
Erica, dripping blood, slipping in the pools of it, tripping over bodies, picked up the vial and syringe.
She filled used the needle to fill the syringe with the furiously red liquid.
“We…could split it. I only killed him because I had to.”
I slowly lifted my head from my arms, still sitting in my little corner, my feet resting on John’s head and milky white eyes.
“Whatever you need to tell yourself. I didn’t. I don’t want to live. This is probably some fuckin’ bullshit lesson in fighting for your life, appreciating it. Take it. I’m good to go.”
Erica paused, looking at me, torn.
She was a good person. Probably.
I mustered a look of phony compassion and sincerity.
“Do it, please. Save yourself. Let me do one thing before I go.”
Truth is, I didn’t give a rat’s hairy ass about doing any good. I was just tired and wanted to clock out.
She stuck the syringe in her right arm and plunged, shooting the red into her veins.
“The end,” I thought, ready to get some fuckin’ peace.
Erica dropped dead instantly.
And there he was.
No zooming, no echoing whispers. Just a stride and a booming, decrepit voice.
The Stranger removed that wide brimmed black hat and knelt beside me, lifting my chin so my eyes could meet the darkness of his.
Have you seen The Stranger?
Have you met him?
“You have now.
And you need his blood.
…But that ain’t it.”
A grin broke out across his visage, his teeth now mangled and elongated and yellowed.
“Ain’t nothing in ya, nothin' wrong with ya.
Just stuck your arm hard with a knife some.
And that vial is poison, ya wretch.
Ya just need my blood to leave this place. To go from one Hell to another.”
I felt panic and bile rise up in me, jockeying for position.
“What the fucking fuckin?” I whined in a strained whisper.
“This ain’t no lesson. No fuckin’ morality tale. This is sadism and entertainment and punishment.
Ya wasted life, all of ya. You’re a horrible mirror and you make me want to puke. The reward for entertaining me a little is the exit it door. The reward for not…well…”
His mouth opened about a foot wide, a cavern of sharpened incisors, and blood and bile and blackness shot out, soaking me, drowning me, suffocating me.
And suddenly, I was sitting at the coffee and bagel shop.
What a horrible nightmare, I thought, until the dull pain in my right arm, barely tangible, snapped me back to the reality of it all.
And I heard a barely audible whisper.
Have you seen The Stranger?
Have you met him?
I looked at my hand.
There was a small red tattoo of a rooster and the word “John.”
I began to cry.

1508

The Knights Hospitaller lead a series of raids against the Ottomans in a mix of galliots and frigates. They were focused on the Aegean territories and more importantly, the shipping therein. There was also a small force under the command of Andrew Barton who struck out at the coast of Morocco, but the great distance needed to sail out and back as well as the small force limited its effectiveness to gather wealth. The Greek and Ionian coastlines are targeted with great effectiveness by the larger Knights fleet, and the Ottomans had not yet prepared a defense force. However, eventually an Ottoman response force was able to defeat and repulse the pirates off the Thracian coast. The Knights also struck out at shipping that looking to end up in Muslim port, and that meant that multiple times they attacked often Italian merchant shipping as well. While they did not enslave the sailors like they often did for Muslim ships, they were still happy to often take its cargo. This would help the Hospitallers return with fat pockets.
Knights Hospitaller gain ƒ335,221 in revenue

March-May 1509

Barbarossa Blues

In the reaction of both the general Italian Wars and in particular the Barbarossa Brother's despoiling of Elba fleets across the Mediterranean Sea had gathered in activity. First, the Spaniards continued their general annual activity throughout the Mediterranean, one of the few naval forces constantly projecting power throughout the Sea. They had already gathered in January, and moved to assist the French and Papal fleet that was gathering in Lazio to remove the Muslim pirates from the Tyrrhenian Sea and follow up with an attack on the haven of Tripoli. Meanwhile, the Barbarossa Brothers had prepared three fleets to strike deep into the Western Mediterranean. The first Muslim fleet was lead by Oruc Reis, attempting to raid the Tyrrhenian Sea directly into the Spanish and French-Papal fleet. However, the latter fleet was having significant logistical and organizational issues as the complicated structure and disparate forces took its toll. The Spanish had prepared earlier than anyone else though, and were able to quickly respond to Oruc's thievery after only a few successful raids. Greatly outnumbered, Oruc was forced to eventually retreat back to Djerba after losing his galleass in a battle against a large group of frigates. Oruc had originally wanted to fall back to another secret base, but there were major issues in its creation and the fear of a retaliation force greatly superior to his own forced his deeper retreat. Additionally, the Papal-French fleet was well aware of the Barbarossa's base on the island of Gorgona. As they torched the base, the second and third fleets struck out to Algeria to take port and attack Spanish shipping on the other side of the Mediterranean. However, the third fleet was caught by Spanish patrols in the region to begin with, and forced to return and rendezvous with Oruc's remnants in Djerba. Only the second fleet was able to make it to the Zayyanids and strike. A force of Egyptian ships and soldiers also make their way into the pirate bases of Tripoli and Djerba, hoping to eventually strike out as well.
At this point, the final fleet to attack Tripoli had set off. The fleet itself was massive, combining the substantial Genovese fleet with the Papal-French force and the Spanish who sailed separately, along side them. Many of the galleys were full of marines and well-paid veterans of the Italian Wars which had just recently died down. The Barbarossa fleets in the area with the Egyptians attempted to slow down the attackers and capture or sink stragglers, but the opposing force was much too massive and concentrated to allow them to make any decisive action. Oruc himself was forced to flee Tripoli days before the Christian fleet arrived, knowing to stay was a death trap. The Christian fleet dropped multiple forces off in different coastal locations both near and far from the haven itself, while preparing a main landing force. Galleys and galliots used ship-based artillery to damage the lacking defenses of Tripoli itself, greatly damaging fortifications at the cost of a fair few ships. The main landing goes smoothly, and the converging attack quickly leads to the fortress and town of Tripoli being brutally sacked. Though Jacopo V of House Appiani, ostensibly the organizer of the reprisal raid for Elba, tried to limit the barbarity of his allies and soldiers it was to no avail. The army taking it was much, much larger than the location could supply or its population was and communication between all the different soldiers and camps made organization downright anarchic at times. As the fires of the first week of looting crackle in the night sky, the Spanish then bid their farewells claiming that they have achieved their goal of helping destroy Tripoli. While the Genovese and the Papal-French fleet remain, the Spanish sail off to Djerba where one of the other major pirate havens remain. While limited to just the Spanish, a similar story is heard there as the Spaniards lay siege. Once again artillery strikes and numerical superiority lend itself to a bloody, but successful series of assaults. Back in Tripoli, Jacopo hoped to find many of his subjects who had been captured and put in chains by the Muslim pirates. By the grace of god, he found his relative Beatrice d'Appiano d'Aragona who had been kept as a prized prisoner. Many of the other captured slaves had been solved off by the time of the return attack, and the razing of Tripoli had killed off many of those who had remained. The lack of supplies and dangerous weather forced the Papal-French and Genovese fleets to return to Italy and Naples to regain supplies, do small repairs, and plan for the future.

Aegean Escapade

The Christians had not gathered the only large fleet in the Mediterranean. The Ottomans had deployed their massive fleet in full force, having been recently rebuilt in one of the only arsenals around. Alongside the deployment of their fleet Sultan Bayezid had called upon an army of tens of thousands to serve as marines, besiegers, and soldiers for hire. The first prize Bayezid had set his eyes on was the Genovese colony of Chios, a relatively small but economically important island. The island was the only location suitable for the growth of mastic), worth its weight in gold. Many involved on Chios itself had their entire lives based around the growth and trade of the good, and Bayezid was happy to threaten the security of such a lifestyle. In this, he had gained the loyalty of the Governor of Chios on behalf of Genoa. Lacking any response from the Christian world, Genoa herself included, that secured a hope of victory and security in the wake of the Ottoman fleet Bayezid found good news when the fortress and town of Chios had surrendered the moment Ottoman troops landed. There were a number of other fortifications established on the island, and many of them either through zealotry or a lack of trust in the word of the Muslim fought to the end. This meant Chios had not been fully secured or conquered until the second week of April. With Tripoli about to be set to siege at that time, the Ottoman fleet then prepared the attack on the true prized jewel Bayezid sought - Rhodes.
The island fortress of the Knights Hospitaller was one of the most formidable defensive structures anywhere. The Knights Hospitaller had maintained a constant schedule of improvements and additions to the fortress, in recent particularly in ways to counter the development of siege artillery from both land and sea. The Knights had a constant cheap labor source - the slaves that their income was also dependent on - and in turn developed their own teams of masons and engineers. Its harbor was protected by a massive iron chain and a recent improvement had doubled the length of the dry ditch. Tenailles were created along both the inner and outside rings of internal ditches, meant to dramatically limit the ability of attacking forces to utilize numerical superiority. They had also established their own artillery force to be used defensively, and the battlements necessary to compliment them. The Ottomans vast strength on both sea and land outside of the fortress, however, meant that they were able to easily land massive groups of men who encamped on the island. The Ottomans offer a no strings attached surrender offer, which is immediately refused by the Knights. The Ottomans return with the digging of their own defensive ditches and earthworks to compliment the siege artillery brought to bear. They had also brought with them one of the largest collections of sappers ever seen in history, meant to undermine the massive fortifications with specifically targeted locations to essentially create weak spots where there otherwise is perfect balance. The back and forth nature of the attacker and defender on Rhodes had meant that the Ottomans were repulsed with relative ease only twenty-nine years ago. Their commander, Hersekzade Ahmed Pasha, aimed to return with their own new developments to challenge the bastion.
This experience lead Ahmed Pasha to adopt a more cautious policy regarding the siege. Hoping to utilize the highly trained and numerous sapping companies accompanying his army, he limits the artillery usage at both land and sea and is careful regarding the use of assaults. The Ottoman artillery is focused on the Hill of St. Stephen where they have the best angle against the Posts of Germany, Spain, and Auvergne. Each Post was a unique "tongue", or in this case an ethno-linguistic group of significant standing within the brotherhood of the Knights Hospitaller. They were each therein their own fortress, often with their own secondary or even tertiary walls, from the shared primary exterior. It was here that progress would be made up until the month of May, when events elsewhere would come close to Rhodes. The Spain Post has a large breach caused by the clever use of land mines on a specific location continuously, something impossible for the defenders to repair mid-siege. Post Germany also has significant wear and tear from effective cannonfire, but Ahmed Pasha is hesitant on its usefulness. Post Auvergne has struggled significantly, with Knights defensive cannoneers wrecking havoc on portions of the Ottoman siege camp. The Ottomans had also set up smaller groups against Posts England and Provence, where the Knights defenders have been able to retaliate in great effect. The Ottoman fleet in many ways serves as a mobile wagon train, shipping in massive logistical efforts to keep the island army supplied and in high spirit.

June-December 1509

The Battle of Rhodes

The Genovese had every intent on attacking the Ottomans and assisting the Knights in defense of both Rhodes and Chios. They needed support, however, to hope to meet the strength of the Empire. Pope Martin VI had lent the Papal fleet, and the French theirs, to save the Knights as well. The Knights fleet still existed in harbor as well, capable of sallying out to assist the Christian fleet in a potential battle. It was then decided that a recovery force would be deployed, in the aim of defeating the Ottoman force in full. There were already troubles brewing as they set off, however, as they soon found themselves entirely dependent on the good will of Venetian ports beyond Naples. They could not make the careful but effective long sail to the non-Venetian Aegean ports, Chios and Rhodes, for the Turks controlled access now. This would continue to be a thorn in the side of the Christians.
In the middle of June, the Christian fleet sprawled itself out against the Ottoman fleet who prepared a defensive position alongside the coast of Rhodes on their left flank. The Christian fleet held a very small advantage numerically in galleys and frigates, and an equal share of galliots, but they were greatly outnumbered in the important supply and transport bergantins. The Ottomans may have a smaller force of galleys, but they had a much superior collection of war galleys, forged in the Ottoman arsenal. They also included a sizable amount of carracks and two galleasses. Both sides have brought on their decks large collections of professional soldiers meant to support the marines in boarding actions.
The two sides go into formation in different styles. Additionally, the Etesian Winds were lighter than normal and at the back of the Christian fleet, giving them some help on the attack. The Genovese and their allies go into a straight line, organized loosely by ranking local commander. The Ottomans oppose them in a Y formation, with the outstretched branches intending to be able to envelop small gaps and prevent retreats while the rear line reinforces. Shortly thereafter, under the scorching sun, cannonfire rings out as the lines approach the first melee. While the artillery in use is still under much need of development and improvements, the Ottoman cannons are able to destroy a large portion of the Genovese bergantins upon approach. This would carry into the initial clash as the Ottoman left and center flanks were able to push into the now V-shaped formation of the Christian fleet within the top half of their Y fleet. The right flank, itself approaching the beach of Rhodes, was nonetheless repulsed by the Knights own fleet. As the melee develops and initial casualties start to escalate, the initial results turn on their head. The Ottomans put extra pressure on their right flank to stem the initial loss and in turn was able to push deep into the Christian fleet, taking a number of the Christian galliots. This came with a loss of support in the center and left, where the Christians had pushed the Ottomans to the point that their right flank was at risk of being cut off. This devolved quickly into a stalemate itself, both sides locked in very bloody combat. This changes when a force of Italian venturieri, commanded to do so by a Perugian Baglioni, landed on the beaches of Rhodes that had been untended by Ottoman defenses focused on the citadel of Rhodes. They were able to outflank the Ottoman ships, as the battle at sea acted in many ways as an extension of the land beside it. This maneuver was able to put pressure on the Ottomans once more, though the smaller size of the Christian fleet was now making itself felt to Andrea Doria and the other admirals. Even though the beach landing had so far been a success, morale within the Christian fleet was not strong against the Turkish tide. This showed itself as the battle waged on and on, where the Christians continued to slowly and painfully gain an advantage. The issue came when a particularly effective deployment of the Ottoman galleasses with a handful of carracks in the center of the Y formation straightened out much of the initial battle line. Both sides at this point had called upon all of their reinforcements, and the Christian fleet was now noticeably smaller though both were much smaller than they had started. The center push could, if not remedied immediately, threaten to potentially cut the Christian fleet in half. Simultaneously, the Ottoman siege camp at Rhodes had gathered a raiding party that had defeated and captured the landed Italian venturieri. The Christian admirals were able to manage an organized fight that consolidated their forces without losing en masse, and they enacted heavy damage to their enemies. Their soldiers, however, eventually cried out for release and were forced to give the day up. The Christian fleet was once again wholly dependent on the Venetian ports of the region and what they could, and wanted to, provide. This allowed the Ottomans to hound them until they were out of the Aegean. There was no attempt to return, with much of the cohesion lost and the Ottomans in an even stronger position.
The siege of Rhodes raged on in the back as well. The brothers Knights had impressively prepared a new set of earthworks had been built in the location of the earlier land mine breach in Post Spain. News was worse elsewhere though, as Post Germany and Post Auvergne have recently had multiple portions crumble against sustained Ottoman bombardment. Ahmed Pasha then ordered the first set of assaults in the siege on those two Posts. Post Auvergne ends up being a bloody affair for the Ottomans, as thousands of Azabs die in the breaches by small groups of Hospitallers. While there were also thousands dead in Post Germany, there the Ottomans had been able to hold a position within the walls. The Hospitallers were forced to give up the first spot within the primary walls.
This situation worsens for the Knights as a strong corps of Janissaries then move into Post Germany, where they kill a force of defending brothers and then make another breach with mines on the second set of walls. Assaults are also held on Post England and Post Auvergne, with the first assault establishing a beachhead before being repulsed by a follow up attack. Post Auvergne shares the same fate, the second time the Ottomans have failed to take it. Post Spain is assaulted, and with the Knights only having earthworks remaining, are easily pushed back. The Ottomans now hold the entirety of Post Spain and Post Germany, but all other Post have either held or are untouched. Morale within the Knights in terms of the strength of their beloved citadel is unbothered. Their morale in terms of the belief that their storehouses will remain full and the Ottoman fleet dispersed by the monarchs of Christendom are not as strong. Ahmed Pasha has successfully taken portions of the citadel, something not yet achieved. Victory is not entirely at hand yet though, and the siege has eaten a terrible cost to the Empire. A cost that would become all the more painful when news hits from Konstantiniyye...

Earthshakes in Konstantiniyye

While philosophers immediately began to ponder the meaning of the earthquake in the capital, the reality was the city was horrendously damaged. A few thousand immediately died in the quake, with the neighborhoods of Galata, Buyukcekmece, and Izmit suffering hundreds of destroyed homes and mosques. Portions of the Wall of Constantinople collapsed and the brand new Bayezid II Mosque had its dome completely destroyed and foundations damaged. Only the Hagia Sophia remained mostly intact. The Sultan's own sickness included, the future certainly does not bode well for calm and serenity for the Osmanoglu. Expectations are for the all the issues of 1509 to be resolved quickly and without fail, lest the patience of some wear thin.
TL;DR

• Majority of Barbarossa fleets destroyed or forced to retreat
  
• Tripoli razed, heavy casualties to Christian forces, Oruc Reis flees
  
• Djerba also falls to the Spanish, Hizir Reis raids from Algeria
  
• Christian fleet primarily lead by the Genovese engage the Ottoman fleet
  
• Ottoman combined fleet and army had taken Chios and set siege to Rhodes
  
• Ottoman fleet wins with heavy loss of ships and men
  
• The citadels of Rhodes are under severe threat with the Ottomans near the interior, but has not fallen yet
  
• Konstantiniyye has been hit by a major earthquake, massive loss of human life and urban development as well as defenses. A certain bridge has been a casualty too
  

Germany, the number one economic power in Europe, launched two world wars in modern times had brought great destruction and disaster to the world, after the war in order to completely eliminate the threat of Germany, Britain, France, the United States and the Soviet Union to Germany and Berlin partitioned occupation, a weak Germany is more in line with the interests of Europe.
However, after the start of the Eastern European upheaval, East and West Germany reunited again under the astonished eyes of the world, why would Europe and the United States allow Germany to reunite? Why did Europe and the United States allow Germany to reunite? Were they not afraid that Germany would become strong again after reunification and threaten the security of Europe? What secrets are hidden in this?
After the end of World War II was divided by the German why can be reunited under the gaze of the powers?
Germany's unification process was relatively late in history, and the German Empire was not established until Prussia completed the unification of Germany in 1871.
Because of the late unification of Germany, the world was basically divided up by other Western powers after the unification of Germany. However, after the completion of the industrial revolution, Germany was in urgent need of developing sales markets and raw material production areas, so it competed with other Western powers.
In order to obtain more space for survival and sufficient markets for goods and raw materials, Germany launched the First and Second World Wars, causing huge losses of wealth and casualties to the people of the world. After the war, the victorious powers punished Germany severely in many forms, including land cession, reparations and occupation. Britain, France, the United States and the Soviet Union kept Germany under the control of the victorious powers through the partitioned occupation of Germany so that Germany would not threaten the security of European countries.
As the international situation changed, the British, French, and American occupations merged in 1948 to create the Federal Republic of Germany, followed by the creation of the GDR in the Soviet occupation zone, and Germany was officially split into two sovereign states.
This division was forced upon Germany, and in the hearts of the Germans they were always one nation, so they looked forward to the day when they would be united again. With the intensification of the Cold War between the two camps, the GDR built the Berlin Wall in 1961, which became a knife in the hearts of the German people and deeply stabbed the nerves of every German until the reunification of Germany.
How could Germany, which was divided at the end of World War II, be reunited under the gaze of the powers?
In the 1970s, relations between East and West Germany eased, and the two countries began to have some constructive interactions. In 1972, the two countries signed the Treaty on the Foundations of Relations between them, establishing good neighborly relations on an equal footing and "mutual permanent representation," and in 1973, both countries joined the United Nations at the same time.
In the 1980s, as the international situation changed, the bilateral relations between the two countries were further developed and a number of measures were taken to ease relations between the two countries. For example, the expansion of highways between the two countries, the relaxation of travel conditions from East Germany to West Germany, the opening of the border between the two countries, and the establishment of an economic community between the two countries were some of the initiatives taken.
In 1989, West Germany proposed a ten-point plan for German reuniication, and later East Germany proposed a four-step program for German reunification, which put German reunification on the agenda.
The news of German reunification caused an uproar in European countries. Britain, France, the U.S. and the Soviet Union did not agree on the reunification of Germany: President Bush wrote in the New York Times, "I'm not worried about the reunified Germany that some European countries fear." French President Mitterrand said at a media conference, "I am not worried about a reunited Germany, and I see the willingness of Germany to reunite as reasonable." British Thatcher, however, expressed opposition to German reunification, and Thatcher expressed strong resistance to German reunification in meetings with both Mitterrand and Gorbachev.
To the Germans, the attitude of the Soviet Union toward German unification appeared crucial. Because the Soviet Union was not only a world power with significant influence on Europe, but also had 150,000 troops stationed in the Soviet Union in East Germany. If the support of the Soviet Union could be obtained, then the German unification would be much smoother.
In order to gain the Soviet Union's support for German unification, Germany supported the reforms carried out by Mikhail Gorbachev, extended the debts due to the Soviet Union, and cooperated with the Soviet Union in various fields such as economics and security. on January 24, 1990, after reading in the "Pictorial" newspaper that the Soviet Union did not oppose German unification, German Chancellor Kohl decided to supply the Soviet Union with 52,000 tons of canned beef, 50,000 tons of pork, 20,000 tons of butter, and 15,000 tons of butter. 10,000 tons of butter, 15,000 tons of milk powder, and 5,000 tons of cheese. To ensure friendly prices, the government subsidized them with 220 million deutsche marks from the federal budget. Thereafter Germany decided to guarantee loans to the Soviet Union totaling 5 billion marks.
The German overtures made the Soviet Union feel that German reunification would not be bad for the Soviet Union and that the Soviet Union could instead use the opportunity to cooperate with Germany in more areas. Gorbachev wrote in his book "I and the Unification of East and West Germany" that the unification of Germany was a matter for Germany itself. The Soviet Union's support for German unification allowed the process of German unification to advance smoothly.
How did Germany, which was divided at the end of World War II, manage to reunite under the gaze of the powers?
Thereafter, the leaders of Britain, France, the United States and the Soviet Union and the two Germans held several rounds of "two plus four" negotiations, and after many rounds of games, on September 12, 1990, the foreign ministers of Britain, France, the United States and the Soviet Union and the two Germans signed the Treaty on the Final Settlement of the German Question in Moscow. The treaty made a series of provisions on Germany's territorial boundaries, political and military status, the end of the rights and responsibilities of the Big Four towards Germany, and the full sovereignty of a unified Germany.
Germany made concessions in several areas in order to gain the support of the Big 4. For example, the Oder-Nice line between Germany and Poland was confirmed, Germany renounced its territorial claims to Silesia, East Pomerania, Danzig and East Prussia, and later "no German territory outside the unified territories has been added to Germany" was written into the German constitution. Germany renounced the manufacture, possession, and control of nuclear, biological, and chemical weapons, and reduced its military to 370,000 within three or four years. A unified Germany was required to remain within NATO and the European Community.
On October 3, 1990, East Germany joined West Germany, unifying the two German states that had been divided for more than 40 years.
In summary, Germany became a world economic power after reunification, but Germany is still limited in military development, the United States still has 34,000 troops in Germany, and Germany has given up recourse to the territories that were ceded to Poland and Russia, which is on the one hand the punishment for Germany to start the war, and on the other hand the price that Germany can pay for reunification.

Shakespeare, Europe's greatest literary master, once described "man" as "the essence of the universe, the spirit of all things". The history of mankind is brilliant, we have created one dazzling and colorful civilization after another. However, there have been "dark ages" in the history of mankind, the most recent of which was the Nazis during World War II, when what they did to the Jews was fully worthy of the standard "dark ages"... ...
Fourth place: religious persecution in medieval Europe
The Middle Ages is an era in European history (mainly in Western Europe), specifically the period from the fall of the Western Roman Empire (476 AD) to the Renaissance and the Age of the Great Voyage (late 13th to mid-14th centuries). The darkness of the Middle Ages, in addition to the continuous local wars and plagues, was focused on the intellectual clampdown and religious persecution.
In order to maintain their independence, the Roman popes established the Papal States, forged the Constantine Gift and set up the Inquisition to punish heretics. They were hostile to everything that was not in accordance with the Bible, including some new ideas and science. Many great thinkers and scientists have been persecuted by Christians throughout history. In the Middle Ages, legal institutions such as the Papal "Inquisition" and Calvin's "Inquisition" persecuted so-called "heretics". The so-called "heretics" were new ideas and people with new ideas at the time.
Number Three: The Black Slave Trade
The black slave trade began in the 15th century, referring to the European colonists who sold black Africans into slavery in the Americas, and a large number of black Africans came to the Americas. In the modern history of mankind, the slave trade has written the most shameful and despicable page. According to the statistics, black tribes were killed by tens of millions of black Africans during the 400 years of slavery in the "Slave Wars".
The black slave trade lasted for about four centuries. Except for a few countries such as Austria, Poland and Russia, almost all European countries and the United States have participated in this evil activity. It was not until July 1890, when the Brussels Conference made a resolution to abolish the African slave trade, that the black slave trade was officially terminated.
Second Place: The Jewish Holocaust
The Jewish Holocaust, the ethnic cleansing of Nazi Germany in World War II, was one of the most famous atrocities of the Second World War. On September 1, 1939, the Second World War officially ignited in the European theater. With it came a new phase of Nazi persecution of the Jews, which was horrific in its cruelty.
The essence of the European Jewish people was lost in the Holocaust, and those who survived Hitler's death camps carried the horror and trauma of the Holocaust with them forever. One commentator has said that the Jews of Europe were a tortured, captive, slaughtered, and divided people. Six million Jews in Europe became condemned to die under Hitler's butcher's knife, including one million children. One third of the world's Jews fell victim to the Nazi racist doctrine at that time.
No. 1: The Mongol Armies' Western Conquest
For nearly half a century, from 1217 to 1258 A.D., the Mongol Empire, with the Mongol Khan at its center, spread its iron heel over vast areas of Europe and Asia through three western conquests. On his way back from the western conquests, Genghis Khan educated his descendants with the famous maxim: "The greatest pleasure in life is to cut down your enemies, rob them of all their possessions, and watch their relatives cry tears of pain."
Everywhere the Mongol soldiers went, they tried some way to kill the local population clean. Besides outright massacres, they also burned all granaries and houses, making the fleeing civilians freeze to death in winter; trampled and destroyed farmlands and irrigation systems, making the locals starve to death later on when they had no food source at all; and contaminated water sources with rotting corpses, making a large number of people drink the water and catch diseases and die. During the establishment of the Mongol Empire, Mongol armies slaughtered 200 million people during their conquests in the 13th century, a figure that became the most ignominious and bloody Guinness World Record in human history.

TW: MENTION OF SELF HARM AND A KNIFE. Hi reddit, I come to you for advice and I’m sorry in advance for the long post, I’ll try to add a TLDR at the end. Im also welcoming harsh or constructive criticism also so please don’t think I’m here to be validated in my situation.
For some context, “John” and I have been together for a total of just over 5 years, not counting a recent 1 year time apart. We met under weird circumstances, where a close friend of mine lived in a share house and I needed a place to stay as my current boyfriend was being physically abusive and I needed to escape. (There were later assault charges laid against him which he was found guilty of after court hearings)
My friend organised for me to move into a room in this sharehouse and John was a regular visitor there of one of the housemates and he spent a lot of time in the loungeroom with them smoking weed and playing video games. John and I instantly hit it off and became very close, and became romantically involved very quickly. He helped me a lot with getting a bed and furniture for my new room.
John came from a pretty well off, stable family, who are pretty conservative and really value family. They also all have really good educations and careers with well paying jobs. John is sort of a black sheep where he dropped out of college and sort of slipped into casual drug use and partying which overall isn’t the worst but it’s something unheard of for his family and they just don’t understand the lifestyle. I really came to love his family over the years however and really got along with his mother.
We ended up moving in together after a few months, but after about 6 months John asked for us to live separately and he moved into his own apartment and I lived in my own. We continued like this for almost 2 years until I moved back in with him after my landlord asked to take back the apartment so his son could move in during COVID.
John and my relationship was full of love but at times kinda toxic, and we had a lot of external stresses going on especially with me recovering from the trauma of that past abusive relationship as well as more trauma from family/childhood. John also had his best friend pass away unexpectedly from a drug overdose and it was really hard on him. We were both also in dead end, high stress jobs which I think overall made us miserable.
We would often argue, mostly about misunderstandings and feelings being hurt. In retrospect we were both just feeling hurt and insecure constantly. These fights mostly happened under times of stress eg getting ready to go to a family dinner. The arguing got worse when we decided to quit weed and cigarettes, as we were both determined to get sober completely. these were the only drugs we used during our relationship, apart from those and junk food we were pretty much going well working towards a healthy lifestyle together.
Now I have a history of self harm, it happened frequently during childhood, long story short my mother was a drunk and physically abusive and whenever I managed to get the police over, she would act and make everything seem fine. She often wouldn’t allow me to leave the house. I started self harming as a way to deal with the frustration and I figured out quickly that if I showed the police any cuts on my body, they legally had to remove me from the house, which they did multiple times until I left home at 17. I guess this overall has created an addiction in my brain and a very bad way to deal with stress. It’s a lot better now, hasn’t happened in over 6 years but I do have a very visible giant scar on my arm from a particularly bad instance in my early 20s.
There was a situation during John and my relationship however where I almost self harmed. Due to my ptsd, if something intense, violent or aggressive thing happens towards me, my body seems to go through a response that can last days or weeks. I get progressively more tense, paranoid,can’t sleep or think ect. It would often lead to self harm, and more often than not would be relieved after self harming. These are all things I regularly spoke to doctors and psychologists about. I had medication prescribed for these episodes. John started asking me to tell him before I took the medication (it’s prescribed as needed not a set one day dose like anti depressants so I will only take one or two over two or 3 days to allow my body to calm down then stop)
He then started convincing me to not take it when I said I needed it. One night I had brought up taking it a few times due to an incident at work. I worked cleaning public toilets and a drunk person threatened to punch me. This caused my stress and anxiety to build up over a few days so I wanted the medication. After a few times of him talking me out of it that night, I couldn’t take it. I was laying there trying to sleep having brutal images in my mind of my own self harm and I couldn’t stop panicking. I got up and took the meds. John found out and got angry at me, which made me snap.
I ran to the kitchen and grabbed a knife and tried to run to the bathroom with it . I stopped in the hallway when I saw his face and I dropped the knife and said you might need to call an ambulance and have me sectioned. It didn’t end up happening as the meds kicked in and I calmed down and no one was sent out.
This incident was probably the worst thing that happened during our relationship and weighed on us pretty badly. We were unable to talk about it or move past it . We wanted to get relationship counselling but we never got there before we broke up. It was sad and awful. We both loved eachother so much but didn’t know how to move past all this bad stuff.
It’s been a little over a year since then, and our lives have changed a lot. We are actually at the same college now after leaving our full time jobs. He is studying engineering and me IT.
We started talking again a month ago and we realised we still very much want to make it work. This time with healthy boundaries and couples therapy. We want to continue to live separately too while we work on things.
John’s parents seemed happy we were back together but his brother and SIL aren’t. They called johns dad and said if I continued to go over their house (john is living with his parents currently) then SIL would not allow johns parents to baby sit their baby anymore as they didn’t want the baby around me .
John told me this is because when we were broken up he told his brother about the self harm attempt and they were scared that I am emotionally unstable and bad to be around their child. John feels bad about this and said he shouldn’t have told his brother this without full context.
But I also sort of understand. I’m not mad. Just very sad and feeling like a very bad person.
I guess I’ll end here, this is already too long. What do I do? This has caused everyone a lot of sadness.
TLDR: bf and I have A rocky past, we are trying to repair. His Brother and SIL don’t want me around after hearing about my history of self harm.

A Fanfic of u/SpacePaladin15’s work “The nature of Predators” Thank you for the story!
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Memory transcription subject: Kilousai, Kolshian Head Genetic Biologist
Date [standardized human time]: REDACTED
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Something that has always amused me was how primitives talk and act like people. Yet are so easily manipulated into being whatever you wished them to be. Take Female Venlil Feed Subject #387V-42. She believes herself to be one of the foremost Genetic Biologists in our field. Yet all she has done is make a poor, pathetic version of what my own species and the Farsul have mastered centuries ago. Sure her nanites could cure cancers in a matter of minutes, but it's just such a waste of resources to make these for primitives.
However there are a scant few primitives that are worthy of truly being uplifted to the same status as a Kolshian or Farsul. Take Venlil Test Subject #12v-01. By all means he should have been caught by the Exterminators and burned to death with a flamethrower. Thankfully we caught this gem of a being with early screening and gently had his life altered to ensure that didn’t happen. With a few small interventions, such as the removal of his parents and ensuring that he was always in the right place at the right time, we were able to take advantage of his aggressive behaviors, and alter his beliefs to align with our own. He truly was something special. I do hope we don’t have to purge this one. The Venlil experiments have shown great promise.
“Oh I am so glad to be able to work with you directly Kilousai! I hope you don’t mind but I would like to get a photo with you to show to my friends back home! Well, show them once we’ve cured Humanity!” Go on you stupid piece of meat just keep talking. It’s one of the two things you will ever be good for.
“Of course! We are going to accomplish so many good things for the Federation today! In this very facility we have made great strides into ensuring that our future will be prosperous and safe!” I do so love how Subject #12v-01 reacts so differently than the feed. His tail muscles gently tighten at the base, his ear slowly pivots to listen to my words. Yet he doesn’t even feel for the knife hidden just in his fur under his right arm. I could tell he knows that when I say ‘we’ I am not including the feed in that statement.
Finally the elevator reached the bottom. “Oh! Finally we are here!” The doors opened to reveal Subject #592A-01. The large Arxur made for an imposing presence in the doorway. His deep blue tactical gear would almost be completely invisible in the dead of night. Yet in the clinical white hallways almost appeared as a slightly blue void.
As predicted the feed began to hysterically try and flee while screaming and alerting anything that might have wished to harm her of her presence. Typical. “AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!! NOOOOOOOO NONONONONONO!” Subject #592A-01 did not flinch or move as instructed. Good.
What wasn’t good was the ear splitting wail from the feed as it desperately tried to flee. It was setting Subject #12v-01 on edge. He hadn’t reached for his knife yet, but had simply taken a defensive stance. I imagine my calm demeanor clued him in on how to act. Clever.
I strode forward past it. “Come along now! We haven’t got all day! 592A-01 help them along, please and thank you.” Subject #592A-01 surged forward and quickly seized the feed. She began to frantically hit the muscle laden arms of Subject #592A-01 yet her claws were unable to even tear the cloth covering his armor. Small traces of orange blood started to cover Subject #592A-01’s gear before he pinned the feed’s arm behind it to stop it from damaging itself further. The wailing sound was starting to give me a headache but it wouldn’t last much longer
Subject #592A-01 turned and grabbed Subject #12v-01’s arm and began to drag them behind me as we walked down the corridor. Subject #12v-01 was barely able to touch the ground but complied and walked with us, while the feed was drug kicking and screaming.
This right here. Any primitive other than Subject #12v-01 would be just like this feed, panicking like the dumb animals they are. Yet here he was. Someone that was paying attention, fully intent on surviving and taking advantage of any opportunity to the fullest.
I turned into the activity room I set up for this demonstration. 10 of my hand raised Arxur soldiers stood at attention waiting for me to give any order. Their gear almost making them indistinguishable from Subject #592A-01, who came in and deposited both Subject #12v-01 and the feed into the center of the room and stood back to guard the door as instructed previously. The feed desperately clung onto Subject #12v-01 who almost seemed to console the feed but simultaneously arranged himself to be able to use her as a shield if needed. Clever.
“Ahem…” The feed jerked her head to be able to see me, while Subject #12v-01 kept the Arxur Soldiers and Subject #592A-01 in his field of view, yet couldn’t see me as well. Clever. “Welcome to the labs! Here I work diligently to ensure that the Federation has all the tools necessary to keep everyone safe!” I grasped my tentacles together in a giddy excitement. It was always great to share my work with others!
“SAFE! SAFE? These are fucking monsters! We aren’t safe!” I grimaced at that statement. An expression that thankfully Subject #12v-01 was able to see when he turned to face me. He was now focusing his attention on me. He clearly knew I was in charge and thus was the biggest threat to his safety. Clever.
“Sorry, I wasn’t referring to you Female Venlil Feed Subject #387V-42.” Her ears drooped and her jaw hung loosely from her head. I could barely make out the faintest sound from her mouth. Subject #12v-01 seemed to recognize the feed as a liability now. Good. “You see. In order for there to be prosperity there must be safety. For there to be safety there must be control.” Subject #12v-01 seemed to calm down and while he was still tensed ready for action, took a more neutral stance. The feed simply stared in abject horror and disbelief. Pathetic.
“When we, the founding species, discovered the third race of intelligent beings, we were aghast at their barbaric and primitive natures. They were still killing each other with sticks! And for what? Land? Water? Food?” I started to pace back and forth as I taught my history lesson. “NO! They killed each other in the thousands because the other members of their species were simply their enemies! Couple this with the disgusting act of eating corpses, fish and other small animals, every attempt to make them into something respectable failed. They were just too aggressive. Too… predatory.”
The feed just started to shake and sob. Subject #12v-01 looked to understand where I was going with this. I gestured to the squad of Axur in the room. “Take the Arxur for example. When we discovered them they were locked in a civil war over ideals. The ideals of, is it better to be feared, or to be loved? The dominion believed that cruelty was the best way to control and keep their people safe, while the Northwest Bloc tried to be transparent with their people, tried to let them be free, even if that made things dangerous.” I felt another wave of excitement rush over me as I started to bounce on the spot.
“The best thing happened when we made contact! They declared peace! They started to work together! Both sides desperately strove to incorporate our technology and follow our uplift plan! They desperately wanted to be like us! To live in peace and harmony! The only uplifts to ever do so without us having to prune their primitive cultures first!” The feed just shook her head in disbelief.
“The only mistake we made with them was not realizing that they were incapable of digesting plant matter at all. They were the first sapient obligate carnivores that we had ever found! So when the time came and a famine struck Wriss, we gave them a cure to end their dependence on meat." I animatedly shrugged as I kept teaching "Ooops! Killed nearly a fourth of their population! Thankfully it didn’t kill all of them. Though something strange happened. All of their livestock died. When we realized what had happened we already began to draft an extermination plan and got our fleet into position when the oddest thing happened.”
I held my tentacles wide in excitement. “Their PROPHET contacted us! Let us know that the dominion had taken control! That they used our ‘cure’ to kill their livestock. He made his people doubt the way of the Northwest bloc, and reinforced that the Dominion is in the right. He gave us proof of what we always knew. FEAR. Fear rules unchallenged. So we gave the Prophet’s most loyal weapons, and they purged the Northwest Blocs staunchest defenders. Then came the time for them to return the favor they owed us.”
Subject #12v-01 was completely calm now. He knew what was coming. The feed looked lost, distant. Worthless. “We moved our fleets out of the way. After all. We had no idea we were about to be attacked! Then the dominion launched its campaign and worlds fell. People fled in fear, and our control went from being loosely held by us to being a noose around the primitive's necks.”
“My soldiers here are a gift from the dominion.” I gestured around to all of my children. “I raised them from their eggs. Made them the perfect soldiers. With them we can ensure that if we, or the dominion, need someone… erased or need just a little bit of chaos to remind the mindless masses who is in charge, well… they will ensure it always happens flawlessly.”
The feed looked up in horror. “You.. You're a monster!” I just laughed. What a stupid notion. “ME?! A monster? Monsters hurt sapient creatures without a single care. There are four sapient races in the galaxy. The Kolshians, the Farsul, the Prophet descendants, and Humanity.” I expected Subject #12v-01 to react to my statement but his demeanor almost seemed to… agree? Good.
“The dominion keeps its people scared of starving and thus in control. Sadly that leaves them as sub-sapients, but every so often they get a useful tool and we authorize an uplift to our status.” Subject #12v-01 looked down at the feed in almost a state of disgust. He was putting the pieces together flawlessly! Time to test that.
“I grow bored of this. I was hoping that maybe you were worth something. I guess I was wrong…” I slowly paced away from the center of the room. Distancing myself just far enough away if either of them rushed me they would never be able to get to me. “My children. Eat.”
In one motion every one of my children turned to look at the two Venlil. With one step heard, all of them put a foot forward and then… Subject #12v-01 decided to act.
With one fluid movement he brandished his knife from its hiding spot. My children took a moment to ensure they could strike without being struck. I swished my tail and gave a silent order to not kill Subject #12v-01… yet.
He grabbed the feed in a manner almost like he was taking a hostage. Then his knife slid into the base of its spine. It let out a blood curdling scream as it fell to the floor. Tears poured from its eyes as it looked up to Subject #12v-01 and then to its legs as it failed to move them. It began to sob hysterically and tried to crawl to the corridor we entered from.
As it slowly made its attempt to escape, Subject #12v-01 cast the knife aside, letting it slide harmlessly across the floor till it came to a stop at my feet. I gave him a quizzical look. He stood proud and stated “I am more use to you as a tool than as feed for your soldiers. I know the inner workings of Venlil Primes government better than Tarva herself. I know how to wrap Humans around my fingers and make them do my bidding without them having a clue it's happening. Use me. I guarantee you that you will regret letting them eat me.”
After his defiant statement was over he stood still and lowered his arms from their elevated position. He seemed to relax as I picked up his knife and walked to him with my tail flicking happily behind me. “YES! I knew you were truly a sapient being! I am so relieved that I was right about you! You saw it, yes? How she wasn’t like us? How she couldn’t act beyond what she was taught?” Subject #12v-01… No Wisterly. “Wisterly, a lot of races consider yours to be weak. Do you know what I think about your race?”
Wisterly took a moment to ponder my question. With a slight tilt to his head he responded “No Sir. I do not know what you think of my race.” I couldn’t help but let my tail flick with excitement. “I think your race has always had great potential. Sadly a lot of your race are gullible to say the least, but you? You are something special. You don’t just accept your fate!”
I waved a tentacle at the crawling, sniveling feed. “You aren’t like them! You ACT! You think! You change your fate! Come now! We are in great need of your skills!” I handed him back his knife. “Oh. #592A-01. Feed.”
I started to talk to Wisterly about our plans and how he would be fitting in to it as #592A-01 approached the feed. He placed a foot on its legs pining it in place. It left streaks of orange blood across the floor as it ripped its claws out trying to escape. Then #592A-01 failed its test. It bent down holding the feed still, locked its jaws around the head and bit down crushing the skull and killing the feed instantly.
“STOP. STOP STOP STOP. WHAT IN MY NAME WAS THAT!” #592A-01 froze, before it stood to attention. “I killed the feed Father.” I let out a long defeated sigh. “Did I TELL you to kill the feed?”
“No Father.”
I took a step closer to him “Why did I tell you to feed? And Why did I not tell you to kill?”
“So that when the time comes I can flawlessly imitate the Dominion’s Arxur, Father.”
I turned away and threw my tentacles into the air. “Children. Feed.”
Failure #592A-01 stood perfectly still as its siblings approached. Subject #592A-02 held Failure #592A-01’s arms still as she locked her jaws around his abdomen and ripped his intestines out. The others descended on it as I led Wisterly out of the room and gave one final order. “Don’t eat the head. Bring that to the lab before it starts to rot.”
​
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Memory transcription subject: REDACTED
Date [standardized human time]: REDACTED
​
Something is off with all of this. I don’t know how to tell Kila that we are in grave danger without alerting Dr. Kilousai that I was aware of his deceitful nature. He answered her every question as though she wasn’t part of the herd. Something was very wrong.
The elevator reached its destination and the doors opened to reveal what was clearly an Arxur in full military gear. He didn’t move from his position and Dr. Kilousai didn’t even seem to care that it was here. Like he expected it. Kila was freaking out trying to get the doors to close, busting her finger bloody as she tried. I choose to stay as still and calm as possible. I knew my knife was still in reach. I can’t let the Arxur know it's there or I am dead.
Dr. Kilousai ordered the Arxur to grab us. I had the thought that maybe the Humans had allied with the Arxur, who made it behind Fed lines and took control, but that theory just got killed when a Koloshian ordered an Arxur. The Human's wouldn't let someone from the Cure Program in a leadership position.
It had to restrain Kila to stop her from hurting herself, but simply drug me by my arm. I chose not to resist. Not the right time. No escape route yet.
Dr. Kilousai led us into a large room with 10 more Arxur in it. The one holding us threw us into the center of the room. Before I could charge Dr. Kilousai and take him hostage, Kila grabbed hold of me and wouldn’t let go. Not good. I gently took hold of her and moved her in such a way that she would feel safe but could easily be moved to defend myself. Sorry Kila. It's you or me in this situation.
Dr. Kilousai cleared his throat to speak causing Kila to jerk and look at him. Stupid. He isn’t the threat. I kept my eyes on the Arxur. They didn’t flinch.
“Welcome to the labs! Here I work diligently to ensure that the Federation has all the tools necessary to keep everyone safe!” He grasped his tentacles together in a giddy excitement. He looked genuinely pleased to share this with us. Odd.
“SAFE! SAFE? These are fucking monsters! We aren’t safe!” I couldn’t stop Kila from stupidly blurting this out. It was clear that upset Dr. Kilousai. Not good. I kept my eyes on him. The Arxur clearly wouldn’t move unless he ordered them to. He was the threat in this room.
“Sorry, I wasn’t referring to you Female Venlil Feed Subject #387V-42.” Spehg. He assigned her a name like that. Likely to distance her being from the idea of her personhood. I wasn’t stupid. My name right now is likely not too far off from hers. Need to change that. He continued “You see. In order for there to be prosperity there must be safety. For there to be safety there must be control.” He wasn’t wrong. It oddly made sense. I knew the federation could field billions of ships for every single one the Arxur could, but they never took the initiative to exterminate them.
“When we, the founding species, discovered the third race of intelligent beings, we were aghast at their barbaric and primitive natures. They were still killing each other with sticks! And for what? Land? Water? Food?” He started to pace back and forth. “NO! They killed each other in the thousands because the other members of their species were simply their enemies! Couple this with the disgusting act of eating corpses, fish and other small animals, every attempt to make them into something respectable failed. They were just too aggressive. Too… predatory.”
Kila just started to sob. He gestured to the squad of Axur in the room. “Take the Arxur for example. When we discovered them they were locked in a civil war over ideals. The Ideals of is it better to be feared or to be loved? The dominion believed that cruelty was the best way to control and keep their people safe, while the Northwest Bloc tried to be transparent with their people, tried to let them be free, even if that made things dangerous.” I thought about it. Thought about the Federation's early history. The Krakotl were a problem. Nikonus said so himself. The federation was trying love and found it failed. Then comes the Arxur fighting for an answer to the same question… I think I knew where he was going with this.
“The best thing happened when we made contact! They declared peace! They started to work together! Both sides desperately strove to incorporate our technology and follow our uplift plan! They desperately wanted to be like us! To live in peace and harmony! The only uplifts to ever do so without us having to prune their primitive cultures first!”
Kila shook her head in disbelief. “The only mistake we made with them was not realizing that they were incapable of digesting plant matter at all. They were the first sapient obligate carnivores that we had ever found! So when the time came and a famine struck Wriss, we gave them a cure to end their dependence on meat. Ooops! Killed nearly a fourth of their population! Thankfully it didn’t kill all of them. Though something strange happened. All of their livestock died. When we realized what had happened we already began to draft an extermination plan and got our fleet into position when the oddest thing happened.”
He held his tentacles wide in excitement. “Their PROPHET contacted us! Let us know that the dominion had taken control! That they used our ‘cure’ to kill their livestock. He made his people doubt the way of the Northwest bloc, and reinforced that the Dominion is in the right. He gave us proof of what we always knew. FEAR. Fear rules unchallenged. So we gave the Prophet’s most loyal weapons, and they purged the Northwest Blocs staunchest defenders. Then came the time for them to return the favor they owed us.”
“We moved our fleets out of the way. After all, We had no idea we were about to be attacked! Then the dominion launched its campaign and worlds fell. People fled in fear, and our control went from being loosely held by us to being a noose around the primitives necks.”
“My soldiers here are a gift from the dominion.” He gestured around to all of the Arxur. “I raised them from their eggs. Made them the perfect soldiers. With them we can ensure that if we or the dominion need someone… erased or need just a little bit of chaos to remind the mindless masses who is in charge well… they will ensure it always happens flawlessly.”
Kila looked up in horror and opened her stupid mouth again. “You.. You're a monster!” He just laughed this time. Not a good sign. “ME?! A monster? Monsters hurt sapient creatures without a single care. There are four sapient races in the galaxy. The Kolshians, the Farsul, the Prophet descendants, and Humanity.”
“The dominion keeps its people scared of starving and thus in control. Sadly that leaves them as sub-sapients, but every so often they get a useful tool and we authorize an uplift to our status.” I think I understand what he was talking about. Kila. She wasn’t really a person was she?
“I grow bored of this. I was hoping that maybe you were worth something. I guess I was wrong…” He slowly paced away from the center of the room. Distancing myself just far enough away if either of them rushed me they would never be able to get to me. “My children. Eat.”
In one motion every Arxur turned to look at us. With one step heard, all of them put a foot forward and then… I decided to act.
With one fluid movement I brandished my knife from its hiding spot. I grabbed Kila. Then I slid My knife into the base of her spine. She let out a blood curdling scream as she fell to the floor. Tears poured from her eyes as she looked up to me and then to her legs as she failed to move them. she began to sob hysterically and tried to crawl to the corridor we entered from.
As she slowly made her last attempt to escape, I cast the knife aside, letting it slide harmlessly across the floor till it came to a stop at the Doctor’s feet. He gave me a quizzical look. I stood proud and stated “I am more use to you as a tool than as feed for your soldiers. I know the inner workings of Venlil Primes government better than Tarva herself. I know how to wrap Humans around my fingers and make them do my bidding without them having a clue it's happening. Use me. I guarantee you that you will regret letting them eat me.”
After he picked up my knife and walked to me with his tail flicking happily behind him. “YES! I knew you were truly a sapient being! I am so relieved that I was right about you! You saw it, yes? How she wasn’t like us? How she couldn’t act beyond what she was told?” I could. That wasn’t a person. It was a scared stupid animal. Not worth my care. “Wisterly, a lot of races consider yours to be weak. Do you know what I think about your race?”
I took a moment to ponder the question. With a slight tilt to my head I responded “No Sir. I do not know what you think of my race.”
His tail flicked with excitement. “I think your race has always had great potential. Sadly a lot of your race are gullible to say the least, but you? You are something special. You don’t just accept your fate!” He waved a tentacle at the crawling, sniveling animal. “You aren’t like them! You ACT! You think! You change your fate! Come now! We are in great need of your skills!” He handed me back my knife and ordered. “Oh. #592A-01. Feed.”
He started to talk to me about their plans and how I would be fitting in to it as #592A-01 approached the food. He placed a foot on its legs pining it in place. It left streaks of orange blood across the floor as it ripped its claws out trying to escape. Then #592A-01 apparently failed its test. It bent down holding the feed still, locked its jaws around the head and bit down crushing the skull and killing the feed instantly.
“STOP. STOP STOP STOP. WHAT IN MY NAME WAS THAT!” #592A-01 froze, before it stood to attention. “I killed the feed Father.” He let out a long defeated sigh. “Did I TELL you to kill the feed?”
“No Father.”
He took a step closer to him “Why did I tell you to feed? And Why did I not tell you to kill?”
“So that when the time comes I can flawlessly imitate the Dominion’s Arxur, Father.”
He turned away and threw his tentacles into the air. “Children. Eat.”
#592A-01 stood perfectly still as its siblings approached. Another of the Arxur held #592A-01’s arms still as it locked its jaws around his abdomen and ripped its intestines out. The others descended on it as the Doctor led me out of the room and gave one final order. “Don’t eat the head. Bring that to the lab before it starts to rot.”
​
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Memory transcription subject: Subject #592A-01
Date [standardized human time]: REDACTED
Current Order: Wait at elevator door to enact further instructions.
The door opened. Father was there with two Venlil. One began to panic. The other froze.
Current Order: Bring Venlil unharmed with Father wherever he wishes.
I grabbed them and had to pin the screaming one's arms to stop her from harming herself. The scared one was easy to pull along. I like that one. Its fur is soft. Maybe if I am good Father will let me keep it? Like the sleeping Sivkit.
Current Order: Leave Venlil in center of room for feeding exercise. Guard door.
I stood still waiting for Father to issue his orders. Crying Venlil was Crying. I couldn't make her feel better. I felt sad as the other one was rather cute. Wish we didn’t have to eat that one. He was rather warm. Would have been nice to sleep next too.
Current Order: Fake step towards Venlil.
The calm one was not nice. He stabbed the crying one in the spine and paralyzed her from the waist down. I wish we could fix her instead of eating her. I bet she is nice. Maybe Father might let us have her now? I would have to clean her as she likely can’t control her bowel movements but that's ok! It would be nice to have a friend!
Current Order: Eat Crying Venlil.
I am sorry little one. I will make this as painless as possible.
Current Order: Don’t move, Answer questions.
Father is so mad at me. He was testing me and I failed. I am a failure. I deserve this. Mate approaches me now. Mate will eat me. Grow strong from my body mate. May the next mate Father selects for you be better than me.
ERROR: UNABLE TO PARSE TRANSCRIPT: CAUSE: DEATH OF SUBJECT
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Happy April Fools Day! I hope you guys are having fun! Uh… APRIL FOOLS! This wasn’t a joke at all! It was the start of my Bonus series. A collection of small stories that are definitely AU and explore Ideas I have. This may or may not have a sequel. So fell free to continue it if you like the Idea as you may be the only one too!
As with all of my fanfics this is considered creative commons by myself so feel free to grab anything from my stories to use in your own works! I would appreciate a shout out for this but that isn’t required.

I am 22 years old and I only write with those 18 and over. If you're a minor, do not interact. The topics are only suitable for adults.
In regard to my experience as a writer, I have been roleplaying off and on for about a year, so still pretty new to all this. I enjoy the build-up from writing (and reading!), and strive to provide high quality responses. I can easily play fluidly with my gender and sexuality; and don't mind shedding away gender norms. I can play masculine women, feminine ladies, or be more fluid as the scene dictates. All of my characters are made from scratch, so who I play as is tailored specifically for our roleplay. I usually play F4M/F4F, or group situations.
Outside of roleplaying, I invite OOC friendship. I love chatting with my partners about our roleplay and in general, but it isn't at all necessary if you're not okay with it.
Time-zone and availability
I am located in the MDT time zone. If you are too, that's great but not a requirement. Like many other adults here, I have a full-time job. I strive to provide at least one response to our roleplay a day and at times several. If something comes up I will communicate with you and let you know that my response times may be sporadic and all I ask is that you do the same. Sending a reminder if I haven't replied for a while is fine, but please don't spam.
Regulations and my writing style
I am very kink friendly. I am very switchy in real life, but can play as a either extreme. I tend to prefer the submissive side in general, but that's role and character dependent. I am open to almost every idea out there, but I do have three requirements that will make or break us being a good fit. I only roleplay on reddit via messaging - or discord. Feel free to get in contact with me in chats or DMs, whichever you prefer is fine, but please know once we've established compatibility I will ask to move to one of those two mechanisms. I will not write on any other platform. Please be willing to write in both third and first person. We can determine which style makes sense, but I tend to flow between them as the particular roleplay seems a fit. Please also be willing to write multiple paragraphs. I want our words to come alive through the details of our actions.
Prompts and ideas * Links forthcoming
Kinks/Limits
Nothing you see is mandatory, but if your limits contain most of my kinks we probably won't be a good fit.
Here is a kinklist if that's easier to digest: https://i.imgur.com/LI7tyE4.png
Kinks:

• Groups/Gangbangs
• Creampies
• Non/dub-con
• Degradation/humiliation
• Pegging (if I play male or for male subs.)
• Corruption
• Screaming/crying/begging
• Sadism/masochism/sadomasochism
• Kissing
• Face fucking
• Worshiping
• Impact play
• Established dynamics (whose the dominant/submissive. Daddy/mommy/mistress etc.)
• Obedience
• Submissive to me, dominant to everyone else
• Manipulation
• Psychological and physical abuse
• BDSM
• Misogyny and reverse misogyny
• Realism.
• Saliva/droll/spitting.
• Sexually submissive authority figure characters.
• Anal
• Extreme abuse (slapping, kicking, punching, beating, burning, branding, etc.)
• Freeuse
• Groping
• Blowjobs
• Being shared
• Objectification
• Facesitting

Maybe

• Denial
• Cuckqueaning
• Cuddling
• Asphyxiation/choking/breath play
• Squirting
• Overstimulation
• Drugs
• Toxicity
• Rimming
• Mind breaking
• Violence
• Torture
• Race play

Limits

• Scat (any toilet play)
• Vomit
• Gunplay/Knife play
• Blood
• Beastiality
• Unrealistic proportions/hyper.
• Filthy characters (being unclean/musky etc.)
• Snuff
• Gore
• Necro

There you have it. If you want to include a kink that you don't see (as long as it's not a limit,) or have any general questions, feel free to ask.

As it says in the bit you clicked on: I’m delightful. Read further for a small sample of the many ways in which I am wonderful, and find out how you, yes YOU, can take advantage to the amazing limited time offer. Also, we're social distancing, so I suppose this is a good time for torrid correspondence.
Offer includes:
Wit: I’m funny. Sometimes dry and biting, as when hanging out over drinks and I’m making acerbic sotto-voce comments about the dipshits at the other end of the bar, declaiming upon how Democrats are just as bad as Republicans and anyway Hillary is super corrupt. Sometimes absurdly silly, as when we are in bed, and especially in those awful moments during kink when pushing our emotional boundaries has inadvertently shattered the shared intimacy whereby situations that might otherwise be horrifying turn unbearably hot and sexy and intimate; (because you are firmly bound, suspended from a hook in this door-frame, with a ball gag distending your mouth and a large man is selecting amongst his toys for what to hit you with, now that you’ve been worked over with the crop that he’s still using to caress your clit. For example). Talking about the kink is supposed to be further down, but I’m proud of my ability to notice those moments and pull the gag and start improvising a progressively more absurd re-telling of the constitutional convention as a poorly organized swingers convention, using the contents of my pockets to represent the various founding fathers and their outhouse assignations with Jefferson.
Frightening intellect: I’m really, really bright. I read, constantly and voraciously and indiscriminately, at least as far as subject. I pay attention to news and politics and policy and everything else and I’m always glad to spend time with someone else who is as interested in the world as I am. I adore — really, deeply adore— doing kink with terrifically intelligent women; having the kind conversations where I feel like I must be a genius just because I can kind of keep up with you. Kinky sex is by nature pretty intimate, at least when it is something two people are doing together as opposed to some dude who figures kinky girls are easy and thinks being a dom means not caring if she comes and yelling bitch a lot. But I am not that guy. I fucking hate that guy. I spent years being miserable and basically at war with my sexuality because I thought being male and dom meant I had to be that guy and oh my God I think I’d rather just remove the entire apparatus using a rusty spoon from my Swiss Army knife rather than be like that walking indictment of humanity. So I need to like the person I’m performing misogyny at. She needs to be someone I can talk to before and after and not feel like I’m robbing an intellectual cradle. My capacity to be the most amazing dom you’ve ever invited to cross you boundaries — which I can totally be — is tied directly to how much I respect you as an equal making a choice and my assessment of your respect for me in the same way.
Sexy: There is no one true standard of hotness, and I don’t hold myself forth as the platonic ideal of the male form (for one thing? The Greeks were super into tiny penis. I’m serious. Had to do with their ideals of balance, apparently). I’m a big guy, 5’11, white, with a broad-shouldered sort of frame that leads people to think I’m taller than I am. I have a bit of a gut, but not so much that you’d call me fat, walking down the street; I suspect that the gut is something I notice but mostly no one else does. I get more compliments on my ass than I know what to do with.
I’m fit and active, I have nice eyes, a good smile and a better laugh. I’m currently clean shaven, although I’ve been known to grow a beard from time to time. (It is a small, neat Van Dyke sort of thing - I couldn’t grow a hipster lumberjack beard if I wanted to. Something else the Greeks would have had opinions on). Brown eyes, brown hair, and bespectacled. Nerd, but sexy nerd. And admit it: when a dude is tying you up and saying demeaning, degrading, frantically arousing things to you, wouldn’t you rather, when drops the crop and your world collapses to the feeling of his fingers (HOW many fingers? God, can you even tell any more, you are so wet...) moving inside your pussy and his thumb on your clit, when you suddenly feel his free hand up under your hair, right along the scalp, in that good, firm grab that makes you feel small and helpless and sexy and dirty and nasty and so, so good (and HEY! Did I tell you you could do that? If I wanted you to fuck your filthy hole on my fingers I’d have told you to, wouldn’t I? So stop, or I’ll have to take them away) ... in that moment, I have to believe you’d rather have the person whispering sweet, dirty nothings in your ear be one who can use words like “wanton” and “harlot” as well as “skank” and “hoe” or strangely popular “bitch”. Who can capture your imagination even more thoroughly than he’s bound your hands and ankles. I don’t know. I’m not even just a little bit submissive, and even if I was I’d still be a dude. But I have to believe -and user feedback surveys seem to support - that it is better when the violence of action is matched by wickedness of mind and quickness of wit.
Liberal: I’m not imposing a political litmus test. But because I only screw people I like and who I at least believe like me, and because the politics of the moment are centered around such a toxic person leading an even more toxic movement it matters: If you are on board with the current conservative movement in America, just... no. Because while I might get past the stupid policy, maybe. I mean probably not, but I can forgive well-meaning and ignorant, at least in principle. But I could never accept the cruelty.
Feminist: As much as I enjoy deploying the tropes and language of misogyny in bed with a likeminded partner, my enjoyment of that for that performative misogyny hinges on you being in on the joke (if you’ll allow). It isn’t just about “being good”; virtue has nothing to do with it, at least in this context. It is because as a dominant I get off, in large part, on your desire: controlling it, restraining it, heightening it, sustaining it and ultimately satisfying it (or not, as circumstances dictate). If we don’t start from a place where we both see ourselves as peers, I can never be really sure that desire is authentic or authentically mine. And I am egotistical enough, or maybe just have enough self-respect, to demand that I be certain that your desire is for me, specifically, at least in the time we are in “bed”. (although the bed is only the actually relevant piece of furniture at most half the time. Really, beds are actually terribly designed for good sex. Post coital cuddle and bullshit sessions, while we discussed what worked, what really worked, and what needs work? That is a fine use for the bed. For fucking and fucking related program activities? At best a poor second to a good couch or any of a wide variety of chairs.
Stoned-sex: I love the way it affects my physiology, keeping me aroused and in the moment for hours and hours and the way it drops my refractory period down to only a few minutes or a half an hour before I’m in the mood again. And I love the way it slows down my otherwise sometimes too quickly racing mind, so that I can slide effortlessly into the dominant analog of subspace; that mental space where calling a pretty girl who I like and respect and admire a lazy no good whore, where yanking her up by her hair, slapping her face and telling her to get her greedy little mouth all the way down my cock or I’ll show her what rough really means... Weed helps me be in that space without quite so much second guessing or worry that I’m going to hurt you. It lets me trust my instincts and you and your ability to safeword out, and that is good for both of us.
Kinky: Obviously. And obviously, this is shot through with examples. But: I like power and control. I like, more than anything getting to know you and your mind and being able to figure out how to wrap you around my fingers so thoroughly that I hardly have to lift them to have you dancing my tune. I can be rough, and cruel, and I love causing pain, even to the point of tears and balancing that against urgency and a desire to please and an orgasm that I can hold just out of reach until the moment I don’t and just as your are falling off from that peak ratcheting the sexual energy back up so that even though you just came call over my hands or cock or mouth you’d do anything-Anything-ANYTHING for one more caress, one more thrust, one more slide of my tongue (inside: that specific, delightful acid tang of the inside of a cunt that you only taste when you push your tongue deep inside - it never lasts on a finger, for some reason - then out and up and you can feel her tremble, strong and subtle and if it were a song this bit would be almost subsonic and then under the clit and around and there she goes, she’s starting to beg again and now I kinda have a crush on her because she is learning me back, harlot instead of whore, and an under-undercurrent of mirth beneath it all: the power is real and the desire is real but we also both know it is a joke, a shared secret: we can do this and still be friends and isn’t that fucking awesome?).
I have a few specific fetishes: I like to decide what you wear, when we are together: I love being able to look at you and know, not just that you’ve made yourself into an expression of my ideal of high femme sexuality, but that as you did so, with every little bit, anticipation was building. That I’ve been teasing you, maybe for hours, without doing a thing or saying a thing. (And of course, it plays back into desire and its close cousin, consent. If every stitch you are -and every stitch you are.- wearing was chosen with an eye to my desires, that is an implicit declaration of enthusiastic consent). I have a bit of a twist for deviance. Sitting next to a woman who I know has got nothing on under her panties but the butt plug I told her to wear is hot; hotter still if I handed it too her at the bar and she returns from the bathroom and hands me her panties. Hotter still if I hand it too her and she doesn’t go to the bathroom, but just looks around and then slides it up her ass with a smirk and a “Thank you SiDaddy”. I like being called Daddy, sometimes. There is something inherently provocative when the kind of woman -scary smart, self-confident, and self-aware - that I am drawn to lets a breathy, anxious “Daddy” slip her lips. There is something inherently filthy about hearing that word, with all its baggage, demeaning, infantilizing implications fall from the lips of someone who is alive to those implications and is calling to me in that way not despite them, but on account of them. (It isn’t my revolution if I can’t dance to it. And it isn’t my feminism if we can’t repurpose our cultural baggage in order to have a spectacular sex life in a magnificent relationship).
I have more than a bit of the daddy in me. A bit physically — I’m solid like that. And still more in attitude. As much as I demand of a partner, I cherish knowing I can be a very particular kind of safe place to stand for her. I enjoy, even need, to be protective and caring, supportive and nurturing. Not only in that quiet place after we have hit the climax (or between the first, easy release and starting the next assent — which is very much part of why I like being able to combine weed with my kink. As much as I love giving reign to some of the darker parts of my personality during the rush of kink, I also exulting that aftermath; when your head is on my chest and my arm wraps around you, and my hands explore your body without any urgency or any hesitation. I love that feeling of being a place of safety and feeling you relax into my size and my strength. It is the only feeling that I have that I identify as definitely masculine (in and for myself: I’m not trying to claim that experience as uniquely belonging to those issued a penis and number of testicles at birth).
It extends beyond sex; really, that is only the tip of the iceberg. Vital, and you sure as shit are going to sink if you miss it in the dark. But it runs all through my relationships. Arguable without the sexually charged overtones, it is just a over complicated way of saying “I like being a good boyfriend”. But where would we be without our sexually charged overtones? And it cuts both ways: if you are pulling from that part of me without returning the counterpoint of submission I need (or I feel I’m constantly reminding you that I need it and your compliance thus feels grudging) we are going to crash and burn. If you fail to make certain it is clear to me that you are as happy to give me what I need as I am eager to give you what you need, I’m going to feel really ill-used.
Having said all that, I’m not remotely a good fit for anyone who defines themselves as a little. A Daddy/daughter dynamic without the explicit embrace of childishness has an intense pull because it combines taboo violation with a power exchange dynamic that comports well with my personality — being both protective and demanding, authority and comfort works well for me. But I find that the idea of trying to be sexual with someone locked in to portraying a prepubescent very uncomfortable and suspect that I would still feel that way with someone who’s “little” age was more mature. That is a squick, rather than a value judgment. With me, that sort of age play (or even worse pet play) works strongly against the kind of intimacy that I value in kink. Role play can be a blast, and I love it, but I need it to clearly be play, something that can be stepped into and out of without stepping completely out of the kink dynamic. I bring the entirety of myself to everything I do, and I have enough self-regard to demand the same from my partner. If I like you enough to take you to bed, that necessarily means that I value your mind enough to lust after it — no matter how lovely you may be in repose, if you can’t or won’t turn me on with your intellect you will lose my interest so quickly as to acquire a visible redshift as you exit my life. Accordingly, when I reach for your mind, be it too discuss housing policy or my difficulty with a binding, to check on your well being or learn how your dissertation is progressing, (and I’ve done all of these during a scene) I deserve to be able to find it, and you, there reaching back.
If you’ve gotten this far and if you are at all the target audience: (cis-female, like weed and kink together, comfortable in yourself and your kinks, think you’re sexy) send me a PM. Don’t think yourself out of it or wait and see or anything. For fucks sake don't read the following Just put together a couple of paragraphs of message and fire it off. I don’t know what will happen, but I know for sure you won’t regret having done so. After all, like I said right up top: I’m delightful. I bet you are too.
I used to try and assert that I don’t have a type. That isn’t true, though: I have several even beyond the implicit, willful intellectual type suggested above. And the list keeps growing: I’m forever delighted by the variety of women who've made my hindbrain start barking and trying to do tricks, at one time or another. Granting that, my abiding lust objects resemble 40’s pin ups far more than 00’s porn stars, at least insofar as body type goes; tattoos and piercings can be wonderfully sexy. Likewise, though a wonderful rack can be a wonder to behold a girl in an A-cup who has that warm flare of hip and legs that go all the way down can lead to me walking into traffic. Finally, my experience of myself is sufficient for me to say confidently that race isn’t a factor in my libido, either for or against.
I live in Chicago, love my city, and for all I value the intellectual aspect of all this, I want ultimately to meet one (or more, I suppose;) women with whom I can spend time with both doing sexy things and the kind of things that make us both so terribly sexy. If that means an intense but memorable two days while you are visiting your great aunt Wilma, that is worth doing. If that means ongoing encounters frequent enough to keep us both sated, great. And if those are intermixed with enough non-sexual shared activities that the phrase “friends-with-benefits” is a fact and not just a more polite way of saying fuckbuddies? Even more great. Super, even. And if that last develops into a passion that carries us through the next three or four decades, both of us slightly bemused that we got along so well during the benighted days before first we fell upon one another, carried away on a passion so intense it is visible from orbit? Well. Wouldn’t that be delightful.

I used to pitch my tent wherever. If it looked interesting, I was setting up camp. I kept a tent at the ready in my trunk. There’s nothing exciting about a park; there’s no adventure in that. I didn’t camp out near someone’s house or anything like that, but I have found myself in some precarious situations. The worst yet, happened in East Tennessee.
I was traveling back to campus after spring break. There’s a spot of hills that I’ve always thought interesting. Between those hills runs a long valley. As I drive back and forth between Knoxville and Nashville, I always tell myself that I’m going to camp in that spot, but I never do it. I’m always pressed for time. I never leave in time though. Class is always the next day. Lost in music, I started ruminating on how boring my life had become. To hell with it, I was going to do it. I didn’t much care to do Calculus at eight in the morning anyway. I could afford to miss one day.
I pulled over to the side of the interstate, got my tent and backpack, and started hiking downhill to the valley. It was still early afternoon. The sun was still high enough in the sky to illuminate my way. The vegetation was thick. There was no human-made trail, no way to easily traverse the terrain. As I hiked through the briars and whipping branches, I reminded myself to buy a machete for instances such as these.
I found a perfect spot under a thicket of red cedars, with a nice flat area and no undergrowth. I pitched my tent and laid out my sleeping bag. I didn’t carry much on these excursions. I had a backpack with some crackers, a knife, lighter and a flashlight. It was usually a one-night affair and I’m gone the next morning. I spent most of the day exploring, but on this occasion, I was a little late. My main desire was to hike to the top of the largest hill to see the view and discover what was on the other side.
It took me about an hour and a half to make it up the hill. There on the other side was a wide expanse of nothing but trees. It looked like a green shag carpet rolled out across the landscape. I noticed directly at the bottom of the hill was an old wooden shed. What an odd place for a shed. The sun was farther down but I still had time to check it out.
I descended down to the other side of the hill, with a little haste. I wanted to make it back to my tent before it got too dark, but I couldn’t pass up this opportunity. My curiosity piqued. I was excited for some adventure. I got to the shed, opened the door and walked straight in without surveying the inside first. I felt the earth beneath my feet give way, my gut lifting up as if on a roller coaster, and then fell hard to the ground, breaking my tibia. The pain was excruciating. I rolled around in agony, feeling the dirt and rocky bottom. I looked up and realized I had fallen down into a deep hole, not so deep that I couldn’t see the shed walls. The shed was only big enough to encompass and hide the hole. The hole seemed to be about twenty feet deep, no way to climb out and escape. There was still enough light to see up top, but down in the hole it was dark.
“We’re dead. You know that don’t you?”
I was startled. Someone else was down in the hole with me. I grabbed my flashlight out of my backpack. There on the other side of the hole was a young woman. Her whole being- body, face, and clothes were filthy with dirt and grime. Her lips were dried up and cracked.
“You almost hit me. Watch where you’re falling next time,” she said with a weak chuckle.
“How long have you been here?”
“I don’t know. I’m in and out of consciousness. Sometimes I wake up and think I’m home in bed, then realize I’m in this damned hole.”
“How did you get here?”
“I was abducted… and you?”
“I was camping and found this shed.”
She laughed. “So, you saw a creepy shed in the woods and went to see what was inside. Man, you’re a dumb fuck.”
“There’s no way out of here?”
“No, I’ve tried. Nothing we can do. I know you’re hurt pretty bad. I heard your leg snap as you fell. Man, what a sound. I hate to say this, but I’m glad you’re here though. I was getting lonely. I don’t mean I want you to go through what I’ve been through. I mean, I’m just glad you’re not him. Well, might as well introduce myself since we’re going to be spending a lot of time together. My name is Mary.” She widened her eyes and tilted her head forward, trying to evoke a response.
“I’m Gary.”
My leg was bent awkwardly, but no bone was exposed. Even though there was just me and Mary in the hole there were piles of clothing, a thrift store in the middle of the woods. I grabbed some blue jeans and a tee shirt. I tied it tight around my shin. I didn’t know how to make a tourniquet or even if I should. I just wanted to stabilize my leg the best I could.
There was an uneasy silence. What do you talk about when you are trapped in a hole?
“Him… you said him. It’s just the one guy?”
“Yeah, but I don’t know if I would call him a guy.”
“What do you mean?”
“You’ll see.”
“What do you mean? Does he come down into the hole?”
“Yes, and he takes you out of the hole and does things to you… experiments.”
“Then that’s our chance. That’s our only chance, is to knock the shit out of this fucker and get out of here. He’s not expecting me. He doesn’t know I’m down here.”
I started formulating a plan. There were enough clothes that I could hide underneath, and I had my knife.
“Mary, I want you to move forward. I’ll pack some clothes behind you. I’ll be buried underneath with my knife. You lean back on that pile… you know like you had made yourself a comfortable little bed or something. Ok?” She nodded her head. “When does he usually come?”
“I don’t know but it’s pretty regular.”
“How does he get down here?”
“He has a rope ladder.”
“Is he big? Have you ever tried to fight him… to escape?”
“No, he has some…” she hesitated, “some kind of power. It freezes me. I can’t move. I hear a ringing in my head and then I’m paralyzed. Don’t let him see you. We’ll know when he’s approaching. There’s always a humming sound and a clicking.”
I wasn’t believing anything she was saying. She had been trapped in a dark hole for who knows how long. She was losing her mind, starved of vital nutrients. Her imagination had started to create a different reality for her, one that I was unwilling to participate in.
I laid against the wall of the hole on my side. My broken leg was throbbing, as it was laying on the floor with my other leg on top. I couldn’t switch around though. I had to be facing the side the hole he would be climbing down. Mary threw a bunch of the clothing on top of me, leaving my face exposed so that I could breathe and not get too hot. I held my knife up to my chest. It was the old-fashioned survival knife, with a compass on the handle. I had long since lost the matches and string that came with the knife, tucked away in the hollow of the handle. But for my present purposes, the blade was, hopefully, all I needed. Mary leaned back against me. We waited.
After a while, I heard a humming and a clicking. The thought ran through my head that maybe Mary wasn’t crazy after all.
“He’s coming.”
“I know. Go ahead and cover my face.”
The humming subsided, but the clicking grew louder. I heard the door open, then the unrolling of the rope ladder with the wooden rungs tapping out a rhythm as it fell to the floor of the hole. Mary started to whimper in fear. I heard the man make his way down and then the thump of his feet as he jumped to the bottom. The hole lit up with a blue light. I felt Mary’s body go limp and then I felt her lifted up off of me. I slowly, quietly pushed away the shirt that was covering my face.
The man had his back towards me with Mary slumped over his shoulder. He was about to climb up out of the hole. He wasn’t that tall, but thick like a Neanderthal. He wore all black, with a long sleeve turtle-neck shirt. He was bald, but the oddest thing was where the blue light was emanating from. What skin I could see, on his head and his irregularly long hands, was glowing blue.
I was scared as hell. What was I about to tangle with? Yet, I knew now more than ever this was our only chance. I let him climb a few rungs before I sprung out and hobbled as fast as I could to the other side of the hole. He didn’t hear me. I know I had made too much noise, but he never reacted. I shoved my knife into his lower back. The clicking grew loud. I grabbed his shirt and yanked him down the ladder, pulling my knife out of his back, and thrusting it in the back of his neck. Mary fell hard to the ground.
He turned his head revealing large black eyes, devoid of pupils. He didn’t have a nose. His mouth was huge with mandibles projecting from each side. The mandibles fluttered angrily, clicking and humming, increasing in frequency. He, or it, pushed me to the ground, pulling my knife out of his neck and throwing it to the ground. It looked into my eyes, making a hypnotic contact that I could not shake. I heard a ringing in my head and my body went limp. I had no control over my limbs. I was frozen to the bottom of the hole, my plan unraveling.
Everything was a haze. I was barely cognizant of my surroundings so I don’t know when or how Mary regained consciousness, but I could see her sneaking toward the knife. My vision was blurry. I was fighting to not to pass out. I saw Mary get the knife and move quickly toward the being. She grabbed a handful of dirt and slung it at his head. He turned and she landed the knife in his face. He pivoted back toward me, and I could see she had stabbed him directly in one of his eyes. Black and crimson fluid streamed down his face. I could feel my body again, slowly able to move my limbs. I got up as fast as my recovering body would allow and started towards the ladder.
“Go Mary. Go, go, go. Get the hell out of here!”
She went up first and I followed pushing her in the rear as we went up. We were half-way when I felt him grab my broken leg. I shrieked; the pain was unbearable. I instinctively kicked with my other leg and landed a shot to his mouth, breaking off one of his mandibles. The creature fell back down into the hole. Mary and I made it out of the hole and quickly pulled up the ladder.
The creature recovered from its fall. Realizing it was trapped, it tried frantically to climb up the wall. I was relieved to see that it didn’t have any power of flight or levitation or some other weird alien power that would get him out of the hole. Mary and I watched as the blue shimmer of light banged against the walls, like a firefly stuck in a mason jar. There was nothing to do but leave it there and hope it starved to death.
It took forever, but we finally made it to my car. Mary drove me to the nearest hospital. She called the police and told them that we had escaped from an assailant with long black hair and a big bushy beard. I don’t know what else she could say. Who would believe the truth? She pushed the officials in a different direction from the shed, claiming that we had escaped from a house somewhere about ten miles from the actual location. I suspected she knew more than what she was saying, or even more than what she had told me. Maybe she knew that the creature would no longer be there, that something would have come and retrieved him. I don’t know. I do know that I never travel that way anymore and I sure as hell don’t ever go camping. Gaming is all the adventure I need.

Greetings everyone! I've recently released the 2100-2150 lore, but I'll also try to summarize all the good bits here in case you don't want to read all that. I'll also summarize the stuff from WW4 onwards, since that may not be perfectly well understood as well as the stuff from 2022 to 2068.
Here we go!
- After the devastating fallout of nuclear winter and great floods, the world huddles together and waits for the cold to clear up. Many more continue to die between famine, floods, and general devastation as many areas have fallen into anarchy.
- The Global Defense Coalition is set up as basically a slightly better United Nations, which has its own army, as well as the fact that most countries are now democracies help the GDC function better. Though currently it’s just a diplomatic forum.
- The Absurdist Era runs from roughly 2068 to 2080. It’s also known as the 2nd Progressive Era, where decades of repression lead to a few bright decades of reform. Politicians during this time include Alisha Crowder, who undid most of the religious nonsense of Cortez, though not all of it. She is the leader America needed, properly reconstructing democratic institutions after the Jackson administration had to cannibalize many of them to win the war without bureaucracy slowing things down. He was only half-done reconstructing everything before his term ran out, and elections came back. The USA could have legitimately fallen to autocracy when the next leader took power with only half restored checks and balances. But Crowder was the one who restored it, and she got the US back and running on democratic values. Later on she would be disillusioned with the United States, became an anarchist, and would be the only ex president to assassinate another ex president (Julia Land). This either is a sour ending for what was otherwise a great leader, or something that makes her even more unfathomably based.
- Many movements, such as Postsocialism (Neo-socialism), Postcapitalism (Hypercapitalism beyond corporations), and the Solarpunk movement would come out of the experimental vacuum that was the Absurdist Era.
- The “Progressive Three” are a group of countries that are well… Progressive when it comes to social change and “the new thing”. These are Dravidia Nadu, inventor of psychic autotranslators and a hotspot of linguistic diversity, the Argentine Confederation, center of the new Progressive Catholic Church that schismed from Rome, and the Union of South Africa, who have managed to make many races and cultures intermingle while aggressively addressing systemic oppression.
- In 2080, the Absurdist Era stopped due to expanding lifespans and healthspans of humanity, with the expanding lifespans greatly tipping the balance of power towards older generations, leading to a halt of progressive reforms, as reform stagnated.
- That said, it was still a time of great space colonization. Humanity’s energy primarily went towards space colonization and reconstructing the Earth. President Snowden (2084-2192) is basically Sundowner from Metal Gear Rising Revengence, singlehandedly destabilizing the entire world with PMCs and copious amounts of guns. He does however also fund space colonization and start the mass colonization of Mars.
- Bernie Sanders is elected in 2092, literally the only thing he does is pass free healthcare before collapsing on the Resolute Desk. Reed, his vice president would take office afterwards, and stop President Snowden’s PMC adventures. The reforms may have stagnated, but they haven’t stopped.
- The Century Message is a message received by Earth in the year 2100, telling humanity that they are loved. The intent and specifics behind the message remain a mystery, though it seems to come from the star of Vega.
- The Global Defense Coalition is empowered to be the face of Earth when it comes to aliens, and is given a lot more power to have its own spacefleet and be a force in its own right. This was done after fear of alien life was confirmed.
- The Noosphere is discovered in the same year. For now it’s an unknown other dimension, but it is later discovered it’s the realm of human thoughts, consciousness, and souls. It is almost like a cloud where the collective consciousness of mankind is stored, and where past information can be accessed. The Noosphere is the source of psychic powers, though for now it only allows people to read memories from written records.
- The Fatalist Twilight Wars is triggered when East Germany tries to reunite with West Fatalist Germany, which results in a war between FATES, the European Intermarium, Nigeria and Russia. The war sees the reunification of Russia, the reunification of Germany (including both Austria and the Rhineland), and France giving reparations to Africa. The European Intermarium is renamed to the European Commonwealth, as the banner of democracy flies over Europe once more.
- FATES escapes to the Metaverse, but it goes wrong, and his consciousness is shattered. A great hunt begins for his remaining pieces.
- In 2117, the Immortal Era begins, with aging being eradicated by Nigerian scientists. This change is quickly pushed on the entire population, and now those now living may never die. This starts a great decline in religion, with Irreligious people now making up 30% of the population, mostly in the Old World, with the Islamic countries and the New World remaining more religious.
- Healthcare spending drops immensely, and social security is abolished. Countries use the extra revenue to colonize space, build up their military, or fund generous social welfare programs.
- Uplifts are created where animals such as dogs and cats are given implants to reach around human-intelligence. They’re somewhere on the level of stupid humans but can now understand human language. These uplifts would eventually be integrated into society on a small scale, but much like disabled people the infrastructure was not designed for them, and they require special care. The uplifting of cattle creates a hypergenocidal race hellbent on destroying humanity for the sins of factory farming.
- 2120 to 2138 is the Golden Age of Mankind, and the peak of democracy on Earth. Nearly every grand power was a democracy, and nearly every human lived under a nation with liberal democratic values. The benefits of immortality led to a massive surge in productivity, which Earth channeled into colonizing the stars. The United States works on something called the “Martian Lifeseed”, a modified version of the Pyongstrocity organism that could slowly infect and partially terraform Mars. Though experimental, it accidentally became contaminated with Mars.
- The Eden Treaty is established between several nations to slowly terraform Mars with the Eden laser. America had to give up much of its land on Mars to other nations to get their cooperation to terraform Mars, but they still own somewhere around 60-70%.
- First contact would be made in 2138, marking the end of the Golden Age of Mankind. Miscommunication and misunderstandings would lead to the First Solar War, a massive war that would devastate the two greatest powers on Earth; Nigeria and the United States. 80% of the invasion force was sent to deal with Nigeria alone, while a contingent force was sent to try and destroy the United States. Nigeria would shatter, and Pax Africana would end, but not before taking out the might of an entire alien planet out with them. The surviving powers would create a new world order centered around Asia, and especially the city of Hong Kong. (Islam, ASEAN, India, China, the Asian Quadrilateral)
- The United States would unite with other countries in North America into the North American Federation to pay for reconstruction. The scorching of the Midwest horribly devastated its industrial sector, and much of the might of the United States had been broken. The Federation would represent democratic backsliding of the North American continent, as the government that replaced it was less egalitarian and far more militaristic than the old government.

I promised to start posting my novel this week but instead, I figured after the encouragement from the Nature of Predators Subreddit, I would post one other thing I've written.
This is already written simply published in smaller digestible bites for readers.
Please let me know what you think, it would be appreciated.
-------------------------
I, V’lkaar, the Minister of War for the proud Avian species, The Lechinu, the largest and most powerful star empire in the galaxy, have a difficult task. One that I must explain to our diplomat in terms she will understand, based upon our intelligence reports of the United Human Confederation.
Allow me to begin by recalling the events that led to this moment. Our diplomat, Vul’mirria, came into my chambers in a rage. You must understand that when a hierarch of our species is in a rage, they destroy their environment with their very sharp talons. In this case, two vases and an antique desk that was a gift from the UHC Admiral Hirohito of the United Human Confederation. A show of respect given to me when she was but a captain.
She demanded my intelligence reports on the UHC and the earthlings’ military resources. When asked why, Vul’mirria grabbed me by my throat with those talons and nearly lifted me from my chair. Our species having hollow bones, this means that we are still rather light to move or lift. The fire in her eyes told me she intended war and wanted to know how feasible war was for us.
I eventually slapped her talon away and simply told her, “I would advise against war with the humans.”
She punched me. Not in the way that say, a human with their blunt fists would, but in the way that a bird of prey would prefer, what humans call a falcon punch, just without the killing velocity to it. You see, in Lechinu culture, this is a direct challenge to our honor, pride, or right to exist. One does not challenge an avian race to prove its pride.
I reluctantly agree to make this report, but I wish to begin this report by saying the grave insult and expected apology of our diplomat, Vul’mirria of the House of Clouds, before the end of the day, lest she find herself given the same challenge.
Note for my report briefing for any would be diplomat reading this.
I, Admiral of the Fleet, V’lkaar, need you to understand that the human military is not organized nor composed like ours. We have The Fleet, which means our entire military. I will start by saying, yes, we are more technologically advanced than humans in every way from plasma weapons, to shields, to metallic alloys, to the speed of our engines. But I will not fight the humans.
I am no beta male coward, I would not have arrived in this position if I was not willing to kill without hesitation. If my military arm and guile ever faltered, I imagine no end of my successors would seize the opportunity to remove me politically or physically, depending on if my skill in battle failed me or my skill in the war room among our politicians faltered for a moment.
We did not become the greatest, largest empire in the galaxy without extensive military strength and strong leaders. That being said, if we go to war with the humans, I begin this report by saying, I will resign in protest. Not only because many in the human admiralty are my friends and therefore my judgment will be compromised, but because I will not order the slaughter of our own warriors and quagmire that will be such a war on our friends, family, soldiers, and colleagues. Simply put, I will not issue orders I know will result in the deaths of millions upon millions of Lechinu for no gain.
Allow me to begin by stating this: unlike our Fleet, which comprises our space, ground, and defensive forces, the human military is composed of five separate divisions. Please understand none of what I’m about to say is exaggeration, nor is it unverified without extensive intelligence and cooperative exercises conducted in cooperation with the galactic council. I am merely providing the required commentary to put the numbers and citations into perspective. As with any military report, it is required to give context to the politicians so they can understand what exactly they are reading.
I will now explain the introduction and then give an extensive discussion of each of the military divisions of the Human military. Please note, I will be discussing this in the order in which our intel reports judge each division as most sane to complete madness.
The first of the human military divisions are The Army–yes, they still keep a dedicated ground fighting unit whose sole purpose is actions on planetary bodies. Yes, they possess and use mechanized suits, power armor, tanks, and infantry. I assure you, they are not something I wish to see our birds fight.
Second is the Blue Water Navy. As outdated as the concept may seem to us, on every single world with liquid water bodies of any sort; water, methane, nitrogen-oxide, or even sulfuric acid, the humans have deployed blue water vessels to surprisingly great effect. We will go over this and its abilities. Despite the fact that no human has the biology to dive deeper than 50 human meters before encountering difficulties.
Third, the Human Air Force. Yes, you heard me correctly, humans maintain an extensive ground based air-to-space and conventional in atmosphere aircraft force whose job is to protect the skies and maintain total terrestrial orbital air-space control. As well as launching fighter and bomber craft from planetary bodies without vessels present, some of their aircraft even have space-fold drives for limited hyperspace jumps. This I will explain further momentarily.
Fourth, the Black Water Navy, referred to as the UHN–United Human Navies–is in fact a collection of thousands of different ship philosophies built by individual shipyards and colonies with one core aspect across all ship types: railguns, which I will explain why this is a threat that our diplomat has lightly discounted; and the trademark “Honeycomb” hull design of human ships, which some vessels have overcome 90% structural integrity damage and continued to fight because of it. We will discuss this momentarily.
Lastly, and by far the most insane of the human military divisions, The Marines. They are an animal all their own. Yes, the human military has a separate division away from their navies for counter-boarding, boarding actions, planetary landfall operations, and amphibious assaults within terrestrial grounds still in service.
Let us begin with the Human Army, referred to as UHFA, United Human Frontline Army.

Official Report Upon the Human Military for Diplomatic Intelligence Action

Section 1, The Army, Part 1
The Human army is composed of thousands of variants of units. They are the least uniform military in the entire galaxy, and you would believe that would be their weakness. Any cursory glance at them would determine they are in fact a divided rabble of different levels of training that could easily be swept aside, but let me assure you, that is the most incorrect determination. Their variety and unique unit formations are their greatest strength.
Let me highlight some of these units for you, the four most troubling and most enduring of their army. First is the Scottish and their Royal Black Watch in particular. The Royal Black Watch in this year of 2503 can trace their history back to the pre-literature production of the humans, literally a unit that has evolved and changed over the over 1500 years of its existence.
The Royal Black Watch on the surface looks like a parade unit. Defenders of the human diplomats, they act as their escorts both figuratively and ceremonially for diplomats, politicians, and high ranking members of human societal government. Let me assure you that the nearly two demi-macro blades that they carry upon their backs are not for show. They make wicked use of them.
Every single one of these blades can be swung as nearly 18 kilometers per hour and redirected upon a miss with a precision we would have only found possible with the purification machines encountered in the Maldeese Nebula. Yet these humans wield them as easily as you or I would wield a knife or dagger.
Further, every single one of their number isn’t just power armor certified, but has passed the human’s gunslinger program. The human gunslinger program requires super-sentient reflexes for most species to pass and has a wash-out rate of 98%. This means that members of this Black Watch Unit must pass this program to even apply for consideration. Every single member of a unit is able to operate a human vehicle, usually a variety of space, air, mechanized, and naval, and at least two other species whom the humans may encounter vehicles of a similar purpose and type.
Some would argue the diplomats in the room are the best educated and highest trained, but those who have read the intelligence reports know that is a lie, it is these humans in their black armor and wearing the plaid patch of Highlanders that are the pinnacle of training, education, and preparation.
Let me tell you a story of the Black Watch, a legendary act of defiance in the early days of humanity’s joining of the Galactic Community and its Senate. In 2304, just two years after their acceptance, we were in the midst of the Hive Treyarch war. No one had managed to land upon one of the Hive’s planets alone. Orbital bombardment can only get so much done and anti-orbital weapons eventually win against ships. After all they have a whole planet to take hits, you have a ship hull.
It was determined a joint effort would be made. The human ships were not allowed to join, we felt they were too few to defend their own worlds and extended to launch an assault. However, seeing as dedicated ground troops were rare among species and the Terrans abundance of such ground troops, we decided to allow their army to send several units to support the ground actions.
What they sent looked brutish and primitive. Power armored troopers in heavy thick titanium plate. They mounted these exosuits with a variant of weapon systems. Our logistic technicians had a devil of a time supplying such vehicles. Considering the humans hurled physical objects from their primary weapons instead of energy pulses.
When we landed upon Arrat III. The Hive descended upon us with a ferocious might of billions. For seven days we fought for our beachhead, and then the admirals were given permission from the council to prove our resolve and bombard the site to dust so we could established a beach head even if it were irradiated. Now, the problem: we had nearly six million troops on-world and would need to evacuate.
The Black Watch stepped forward with 4 companies and informed us that they would be the last off the planet. They had been the first to step foot upon the world at their insistence, and they had suffered one casualty in their division, just one. I want to remind you by this point, we had entire army groups that were disbanded out of mercy. Their casualties so high that even combining multiple damaged units was deemed too psychologically devastating to continue to use the few survivors.
Those four companies made a perimeter around the starport and prepared as we fled and fell back. Other units joined them but were actively being withdrawn, so the battle lines were getting thinner as time wore on.
When their battle began, the legend of the Black Watch was proven. For six days, we were allowed to evacuate, even after every single other being but the hive and Black Watch were off the planet, they kept fighting. The Black Watch were cut off, and for two final days we tried to figure out how to evacuate them. Terrans being a relatively new race at the time, we did not wish to report that one of their elite units were utterly destroyed. The Black Watch held that line.
Even against the elite guards of the hive, towering monstrosities of arthropods. They possess exoskeletons that can stop some capital ship low caliber weapons. These massive creatures can break buildings with a single blow. The Black Watch held the line.
The Treyarch became scared of them, the telepathic transmissions we picked up from the planet were warnings against the ones in black armor. Imagine that, a species whose war tactic is the endless swarm of pincers, incisors, claws, and chitinous armor plating being terrified of barely four-hundred and eighty soldiers. The Black Watch held the line.
The Black Watch told us to nuke the planet with them on it. With great reluctance we did. We bombarded the world until it was a tomb. Nothing should have survived. We lost nearly two hundred vessels performing the bombardment but we hardened ourselves.
Every single micron of the soil was blown apart and the planet was surrounded by an ash cloud. The radiation alone would have killed entire galactic civilizations across one thousand colonies.
But humans are from a death world. As the fleet made transit to leave the system and the devouring hive was mourning the destruction of the world, we received a transmission from Arrat III. Garbled and hard to understand, we sent a scout ship back. The scout ship returned with three and a half companies, all but twenty beings of the four hundred and eighty we left there survived. The Royal Black Watch we had thought dead upon that world.
As the commander stepped from the decontamination unit. I asked how they survived, the unit commander whom we did not realize was female to this point; removed her helmet. Yes, the human military has fully integrated its females into the military. Imagine that Ambassador, their females are just as capable of frontline warfare as our males! But her reply was only five words, “Nukes are merely an inconvenience.”
End Section #1 The Army, Part 1
Sincerely,
Admiral of The Fleet
V’lkarr
Admiral of the Fleet from Circa 2223-2504

Thanks all for reading! Sorry this chapter took longer than expected, but I didn't know where to stop, so this chapter is a little bit bigger than usual, I hope you all enjoy it!
Thanks to u/Frame_Late for my new profile picture, sadly the mods deleted the image from the main sub because they thought that it was a random image, but you can see it in his profile
Also, sorry for any mistakes, Im not an english speaker
And of course this is a fanfic from a story from u/SpacePaladin15, and the story is The Nature of Predator
Also, here is the whole NoP universe
(First) (Prev) (Next)
Memory transcription subject: Halai, ex-cattle prisoner N° 240524
Date [standardized human time]: November 13, 2136
As the demon ordered, I stood up and once again began pushing myself up the tube, and same as before, once I was probably halfway in there, every wall around me began pushing me upwards
Soon I felt how I entered his mouth once again, but unlike last time where I stopped there, I now passed through the terrifying saw-like teeth to get to the exterior
Cold
It was very cold, very different from the inside of the demon. Now I was cold and somewhat wet from the saliva of the demon, fortunately I heard the cracking of fire and I felt his warmth
But now, I was scared, not of dying of hypothermia, but from what was behind me
Something pushed himself around me, for some moments I thought that the demon had pounced me, but fortunately it seemed that it was only a blanket of some kind
"Well, I think you are dry" The demon said removing the blanket, then another blanket surrounded me, but unlike the one before that was white with dark spots, this one was silvery "That's a thermal blanket, it will keep you warm"
After that I heard footsteps from behind me, they were heavier than any creature that I had heard… Well, considering that he could eat me whole and without problem that would mean that he was huge
I fearfully closed my eyes as I heard the demon pass beside me. Then it sat down probably in front of me besides the fire
'Growl'
My muscles tense at the noise, my mind accelerates and my body began to pump even more fear chemicals through my veins
Fortunately, it wasn't the growl of the demon, but my own stomach
"Oh yeah, you will be hungry, tell me, you eat plants, like, any kind?" The demon asks such a stupid question, of course I can! Normal people eat plants
"Y-Yes"
"Well, the only thing here is either frozen grass or leaves from the trees. If you can't eat those, I can create some pastes"
"L-leaves?" I ask mentally kicking myself, after all, I just asked a preda-
"Okay, wait a moment" Eh?
I can hear the demon standing up and then giving some steps. Then I heard the crack of branches being torn apart
"Here, take" The demon said
Without much else to do I opened my eyes slowly while looking at the ground, I could then see the sharp claws of the demon under a white cloth of some kind
I wanted to scream and run, but unlike before where the walls were visible, now they were invisible
Without fur or a warmth source I would die in minutes, so I had to bite my own tongue if I wanted to live
I looked a bit higher finding a whole branch being offered by sharp metal claws
My paws slowly grabbed the branch hoping not to trigger the instincts of the demon, then after his claws were free he grabbed another branch and sat down relatively far away from the fire
I didn't dare to look at his eyes, last time I looked at a predator's eyes I almost lost mine. Apparently that was supposed to be a defining gesture and the gray that I had looked at didn't like it. The only reason that I survived was because the demon feasted on someone else's corpse recently
The noise of branches being broken caught my attention. Not having a death wish I began eating slowly my own leaves
They were decently, especially after eating that tasteless kibble that the grays gave us for so long
Still curiosity got the better of me, and discreetly I stole a small glance at the demon in front of me
And to be honest, it wasn't what I expected
If my blurry memories served me well, the demon was supposed to be black as the night with red glowing eyes
But now? He was dressed in some kind of white clothes with a white mask that looked like a skull. I guess it made sense, after all, a black mass in a white forest stood out
But what caught my attention was what he was doing
Confused, I looked at him. He was bigger than even the gray that was about to eat me not so long ago. But the interesting part was what was eating
Despite being a predator, he was eating the branch. Not only the leaves, but the whole branch, wood included, and it was doing it with those sharp teeth designed to eat meat with surprisingly ease
But something else that I noticed was that it was a machine
A predatory machine
The nightmare only found in movies that didn't wanted to use the grays as antagonist, or direct antagonists was now sitting just before me
The thing ate in relative silence being the noise of the branches breaking under the power of those jaws,
the only noise
"You aren't eating" It said once again without moving his mouth "You can't eat it?" It asked turning his head to a side "Oh, wait, I didn't saw the tag" The thing stood up once again and began walking towards me
I froze as he passed me to be in my back, during that moment a sharp-flat tail passed by me at eye level
"Let me just…" The thing spoke softly behind my ear. I just stood there waiting for the blow
Clink
A metallic noise broke through the silence and with my side vision I could see the tag of my prisoner number that was connected to my ear through a metallic ring was now gone
The familiar weigh of my ear was now gone
"This is yours, you can toss it if you want" It said, giving me the tag in my paw "... So… Can you eat that or..?" It spoke softly, he then sighed and sat down "You should really eat"
I couldn't respond, I was frozen in fear by just looking at him
The thing eyed me through the tinted dark glasses that his mask had. But after some moments where we both looked at each other, he sighed once again before standing up
"Eat, if you didn't finish that once I return, I will be mad" The voice wasn't no longer trying to be gentle, but now it released his true form
Fortunately it left walking to the frozen forest and soon enough I lost complete visual of him, and to be honest, I didn't know if it was more terrifying to see the monster than not seeing it but knowing it was close
​
​
Memory transcription subject: Leon, UN "Jackal" special forces
Date [standardized human time]: November 13, 2136
​
​
After I left Halai behind, I dropped to the ground mentally exhausted
"What even am I doing?" I asked to no one
My mind wanted just to go to sleep, but I knew I couldn't. I had to watch out for Halai, even though he's terrified of me…And I thought that the camouflage clothes would help… Well in that case I don't this much clothes to cover me
I took off the hood that covered the back of my head and my antennas. Now I had a new camera available, I also let my colorful antennas to the exterior, and finally the fox tail that I had hooked under the camera so it didn't stood in the way, was now once again free
I began eating the branch that I took from the tree. It's leaves looked very similar to the pine trees that were in earth, but they were different, I couldn't pinpoint what, but it was
The reason that I was eating not only the leaves, but the wood too was because it gave me some biomass fuel, not nearly half as much as meat would, but it would be enough as long as I didn't do much moving or doing stuff in general
But now with the problem where I have an alien who's life dependeds of me, and at the same time, it's completely terrified of me…
I could try getting his trust… But how? Hmmm, well for starters I should patch the wound on the back of his head, the poor bastard had a very deep and nasty wound
I didn't do it before because I was scared that he wouldn't trust me, and I didn't want to sedate him
Well, he has no other choice, either he trusts me with that nasty wound, or he's getting into forced coma with sedatives
I could definitely keep him in my medbay unconscious while I feed him through his veins or with a tube going directly to his stomach
But that was something that I didn't want to do… But if it was something that I had to, then so be it
…
Now, it's going to be 3 months in this frozen hell hole, 3 months that I have to take care of him… Why did I even brought him with me anyway? Wasn't his species going to be rescued soon anyway?
…
Bah, what's done is done. Now I have to make sure he doesn't die
Food it's easy, if he's able to eat leaves then that's covered, if not, I will have to feed him through tubes from my medbay… Still, don't know if I have that much supply anyway
Then the next problem is water… We are surrounded by fucking snow, well, I will have to melt it, it's bad to eat a lot of raw snow if I remember well
Hmmm, my torch still has some ammo, so for now fire isn't a problem… The problem would be 'Where?' Where could I melt it?
I don't have a canteen nor somewhere to boil things… Yeah, he will have to get it through me, but how?
Hmm…
Well, my saliva is basically lube, it's something that can be eaten, and because it's a majority of water, he could get water from it… But I won't be spitting in his mouth anytime soon… So that's a last resort
Oh! I have 2 systems to refrigerate my internal components, the first one is the standard one, and the second one is the liquid one
I use a special liquid through a system of tubes through my whole body in case that I can't use air to cool myself down, for example this would be used in space where there isn't air, or in dust storms where sand gets everywhere. And as a bonus, it practically renders the federation flamethrowers as nothing more than 'bright smoke'
The liquid obviously isn't drinkable, but I don't think that I would be using this system anytime soon, so a good option is to replace the cooling liquid with snow, then use the little heat that I have to melt it down
Fortunately because this wasn't supposed to be used like that, the entry and exit point of the liquid was my tail, so every time Halai needs to drink, he won't need to enter my medbay, unfortunately because it isn't supposed to work like that, fill it with snow will be a pain in the ass
Also, because it's water, I will have to keep the system 'on' constantly so it doesn't becomes ice
Oh, I finished eating, well, let's check how Halai is doing
After walking the way back, I could see him eating the leaves of the branch that I gave him, but I could see and hear him sob uncontrollably, silent sobs that I could hear clear as day
He also looked all around constantly in every bite
That might be my fault, after all, I've just recently threatened him with me 'getting mad'. Obviously I wouldn't be, I've just used that so he ate. But I didn't took on account that despite how adorable he looks, he isn't a child, and I'm a Jackal
God dammit, well… I will wait a little so he finishes. In the meantime I will check what I have on me
>Clothes
>Arm bandages
>Survival kit
>Tracker
>Twin plasma pistols
>Repair kit
>1 Jackal MRE
>Four extra plasma cells
>Shoulder armor
Hmmm, well, I've got something at least…
The Jackal MRE it's something that only jackals can eat, that's because of the high amount of stuff that's in there, some of them are even poisons, but thanks to my robotic body I'm able to eat it without problems. And yes, it tastes like shit. I thought that there wasn't any worse food than the one the school gave us in 4th grade. But whoever created this piece of shit had done it
Congratulations asshole
Now, my survival kit has a manual flashlight, pen and notebook, watch, compass, Whistler, knife and a long rope
Meanwhile my repair kit has my torch and a few tools. Something very simple but that can help me do some emergency repairs. Okay, now how do I deal with putting water in my tail?
…
Oh, I've got an idea!
I open my med bay and with the knife I take a plastic tube that’s used in case I need to exchange the ones that I have equipped
With a small and quick bite I cut a small part, then I placed it in the relatively small hole from where the liquid is inserted. Fits like a glove. Obviously I wouldn’t be able to put much snow through that tube, but it will help Halai to drink like it was a bottle
Now, I take another tube part and this time bigger, this time with some heat and my hands I would expand the tube until it becomes a cone where I can stuff more snow more easily
Sadly the fire is with Halai and I don’t want to use my torch, so without much else to do, I grab my things and I walk towards him
He immediately after noticing me begins eating faster than before
“Relax, I won’t do anything” I say walking past him
I sat down by the fire and I immediately began heating the tube and with my claws i began expanding it slowly so it doesn't break, from time to time I stop this process so my claws don’t stuck with the hot plastic
Once I finish I get something that resembles an cone, it’s very crude, but it will help
“Come” I say to Halai who has been looking at me the whole time unblinking “I said come” I order while extending my clawed hand to him
As much as I don’t want to be like this, talking like my drill sergeant is the only thing that can take him out of his trance
Shaking from fear he stands up and slowly walks to me
"I won't do any harm, I'm going to check that wound"
Halai hesitates, but after some moments he finally grabs my clawed hand. As gentle as I can, I close my hand while I pull Halai towards me
Eventually he's right in front of me, even though I'm sitting, I still tower over him a little, still, I don't want to have him standing all the time, so I retract my legs until I'm sitting with my left leg over the right one
"Sit down" I say, he's in the space in between my legs, so I wait until he sits in on-
"Sit on my leg" I say as I see Halai began sitting on the cold ground, he once again hesitates, but eventually he sits "Turn around" I say
Once Halai turned I began evaluating the wound
And for 'evaluating' I mean let one of the AI do all the work
The wound is closed thanks to a thin string, but whoever did it, did an awful… Well, he was supposed to become a snack, so as long as he didn't bleed at the moment would work
Obviously I wasn't planning on eating him too… Well, in a lethal way at least. So to prevent any infection nor any more bleeding I would have to cut the string and sew back
Without much else to do, I grabbed Halai through the arms so he doesn't move with my lower arms
"W-Wha-"
"Don't move, I need to sew"
"S-sew?!"
"Your wound will infect with this awful sews" That seems to silence Halai, and because he isn't struggling I open my medbay. For something so simple I wouldn't have to get him fully inside, even though it's the best way to heal him
Halai's heart goes up quickly, but surprisingly he isn't resisting my grasp, so to end this quickly and not stress him more I began by the most important part of all, anesthesia
From my medbay several small arms that are connected to all kinds of medical equipment appear, and from one of them, the anesthesia one injects its contents in Halai's neck
…
Okay, let's do this

I used to build PC's regularly, but my last system was meant to be sorta 'future-proof'. The parts were good for the time, and it lasted me 9 years, so I feel like that was a success.
I wanted to build during lockdown but GPU prices sucked. My old GPU was $300, and and when I shopped around, I was shocked to see it was selling for more than I paid for it. Now it can be had used for like $70.
I want this PC to last a while. I gradually turned into one of those guys who mostly replays the same old favorites (FO, skyrim, etc)... but now that I can run good AAA titles, I will try some modern games. Maybe see what emulation is possible.
It took some troubleshooting, mostly dumb errors from being VERY rusty in PC building. Details below. Also, obligatory pics with cat tax included: https://imgur.com/a/WAadEsM
PCPartPicker Part List

Type	Item	Price
CPU	AMD Ryzen 5 7600 3.8 GHz 6-Core Processor	$229.00 @ Amazon
CPU Cooler	be quiet! Pure Rock 2 Black CPU Cooler	$44.90 @ Amazon
Motherboard	ASRock B650 PG LIGHTNING ATX AM5 Motherboard	$199.99 @ Amazon
Memory	G.Skill Flare X5 64 GB (2 x 32 GB) DDR5-5600 CL36 Memory	$219.99 @ Newegg
Storage	Western Digital Blue SN570 500 GB M.2-2280 PCIe 3.0 X4 NVME Solid State Drive	$32.99 @ Amazon
Storage	Seagate Barracuda Compute 2 TB 3.5" 7200 RPM Internal Hard Drive	$47.00 @ Amazon
Video Card	Zotac GAMING Twin Edge OC GeForce RTX 3060 Ti LHR 8 GB Video Card	$409.99 @ Newegg
Case	NZXT H510i ATX Mid Tower Case	$106.99 @ Amazon
Power Supply	EVGA 650 GQ 650 W 80+ Gold Certified Semi-modular ATX Power Supply	$102.08 @ Amazon
	Prices include shipping, taxes, rebates, and discounts
	Total	$1392.93
	Generated by PCPartPicker 2023-03-31 21:41 EDT-0400

. . So in terms of purchasing, I dunno if I was optimal. I basically trust Logical Increments to do the homework. Their builds always work, take advantage of specials where possible, and fine tune carefully for each budget. For example, out of the 16 'tiers', this build used an AMD CPU, but most of their builds use 12th/13th gen Intel (including the tier above and below mine). I guess the R5 7600 hits some sweet spot.
It was supposed to cost $1200. But I fucked up and overbought RAM. I thought my apps used mode than they do. I do some video editing, 3D rendering, lots of photo editing, and generally just run a lot of stuff at the same time, with many chrome tabs. But I can't seem to even get to 25% RAM usage. Probably 32 GB woulda been fine (even overkill). The extra $100 should have gone to a nicer GPU.
$1400 is more than I ever spent in the past, but we're in a time of inflation and when you factor that this might last another 7-10 years, it's OK. GPU prices are finally back in line.
Boring build story: I always do a breadboard. Well, it's a bit more than the bare minimum to boot. but I try to get it boot with just CPU, 1 stick of ram, and in this case GPU. The motherboard has integrated graphics but I'm not using them.
When I flipped the switch on my PSU, I got nothing, no post, and wondered if I missed a step.
Didn't panic. Reseated everything. Then I remembered you could run a wire between two pins of the CPU's main power connector, to see if it's functional. I got irritated when I realized I had no paper clips in the entire house, but biting off the ends of a twist tie works. Watch this guy with the coke nails explain the trick: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nfYwKPtDiw4&t=242s (4:03)
So the PSU was fine. What I finally figured out is... I needed to actually turn on the computer. I know that sounds retardedly obvious, but when I flipped on that PSU, I truly expected to see SOMEthing, a light or a "good morning" fan spin. This rig doesn't do any of that. Maybe I misremember seeing that in the past.
Anyway after using a screwdriver to bridge the motherboard's power pins, it booted right up. Got windows installed. I was a little worried that the PSU didn't include a secondary 6-pin connector for the socket next to the CPU's main 8-pin connector. But I guess that's for a beefier CPU than mine, the 6-pin connector is fine by itself.
Side rant: I hate how power connectors are WAAAAY too snug and the CPU clamp is WAAAAAY too tight. I know the CPU can't move at all or instant BSOD/shutdown/whatever. But it weighs as much as a tennis ball and sits still on a desk. It doesn't need a clamp that can hold a canoe to a roof rack. And reseating the main power connector is a huge pain in the balls. I had to break off the plastic latch/ckip and wedge a knife blade into the seam to gradually work it back out of the socket. Mountain climbers could use it instead of caribiner clips. In fact, from now on I'm breaking off that pointless plastic clip, I've never seen a main connector or molex that wasn't absurdly tight.
I got errors running an old installer for a game (one that worked fine on the old PC), which I found alarming. Googling suggested installer used a ton of ram. One smart poster said it might be sensitive not just to ram amount, but timings. I installed premiere and edited some video... BSOD. A really weird, annoying kind of BSOD: the crash screen and text appeared on top of premiere as semi-transparent, and the text was white sitting on a white background. So I couldn't read it. I got it again but this time could make out the word "memory". I was concerned I had a defective RAM stick.
I remembered a previous build problem where a PC would only boot when paired with older RAM. I theorized that was because when it detected the old ram, both sticks were forced to run at lower speed. So I went into BIOS to see what the RAM clock speed and timings looked like. It was set to "Auto" so I manually set it to the speed it's rated for, 5200, and that surprisingly worked. Every since changing that single setting, the game that failed to install like 5 times, installed fine. Premiere has never crashed since (several weeks now). So I'm pleased to have figured that out and not wasted money buying different RAM when this batch is fine. . . Parts sorta-review: At first I was at first disappointed at how the video card didn't seem to be that great. First I tried one of my simple 3D renders and it was weirdly slow. But then I found out blender not only has the option of using CPU or GPU, it has options for different API's to talk to your video card. I set it to CUDA (which is specific to Nvidia cards) and it was over 10x faster. Fallout 4 load screens sucked, but that's because load screens are tied to frame rate, which is locked at 60 fps. This mod unlocks framerates during any load screen and now it's done in seconds.
The only part I don't 100% love is the case. It's made to look as simple and minimal as possible. So they hide the power and USB connector on top instead of in front. And they only put 2 USB in front. So it's less convenient to reach and a couple of items I usually plug into the front, now go in back. It also weighs a ton, and has rubber feet, so it won't move easily when you're trying to scoot it around on the desk during the building process. There's a big flat metal strip for hiding/organizing cables but it's just in the way. Also the hard drive cage can be removed, but you gotta get underneath the case and undo two screws. My old build, simple plastic clips held the HDD's and you can just slide them into place and they'd lock. I had to remove the cage to screw them in place.
Other than that, no complaints, running smoothly, only slight concern is GPU idles at 47°C doing nothing but browsing. That seems to be a hair above the high end of normal. I never messed with fan curves or overclocking it, so I'm gonna run DDU and update to the newest driver, see if it helps. The fans apparently don't kick on until 50° but it still seems like something isn't optimal. Maybe bad case airflow.

I'm watching Marie Antoinette on PBS. Since it's historical, I was curious if she ever produced an heir for Louis XVI. So Googling turned up this old Reddit posting: = = =
User spl1ff_
·
10 yr. ago
It is widely believed that Louis XVI had phimosis, a condition that made sexual arousal very painful for him. Even in those days there was a relatively simple surgery to relieve phimosis, he was deathly afraid of going under the knife until he was convinced to do it after those few years between their marriage and the birth of their child.
​
Allow me to go out on a limb here, as this is my personal opinion. I don't think he was gay. There was an enormous amount of pressure on him to produce an heir and even if he were gay, I think he could have...taken one for the team, so to speak. Even though he finally did produce an heir, the length of time it took irreparably damaged his reputation. Locksmithing was a hobby of his and there was a popular joke that he was having difficulty putting his "key" in the right hole.
​
spl1ff_
·
10 yr. ago
Actually after looking deeper into the matter, it seems that he did not have surgery.
​
"However, it is agreed amongst most modern historians that Louis had no surgery[14][15][16] – for instance, as late as 1777, the Prussian envoy, Baron Goltz, reported that the King of France had definitely declined the operation.[17]" (Wikipedia)
​
Sources: Fraser, Antonia (2001). Marie Antoinette: The Journey. "Dictionary of World Biography". Author: Barry Jones. Published in 1994.

"The Return of the Time-Honored Classic Lit Club"

Episode Summary and Some Notes

Welcome to the Classic Literature Club!
We Open this Episode with an opening Monologue that for many modern anime fans and Light Novel readers will be very familiar, and perhaps fill a few of you with dread in what has now become a cliche.
The Loner Protagonist amidst happy blissful classmates filled with Youthful Zeal and Passion has a Dark Cloud Hanging over him. You can see it in how the colors he's saturated in are in stark contrast to the bright and sickeningly warm and pink tones the envelope the rest of the scene.
He cares not to excel in Academics, Not join a Sports Team, or Pursue Romance.
I'd like to point out as he names off each thing, the Studies thing is self-explanatory he does not want to apply himself in Academics showing a lack of ambition in sharpening his mind, the Sports teams are not necessarily meant to be sports or athletic activity per se, but as we will see later a more general metaphor for developing an interest based on talent, the final one Romance has a double meaning in not just romance in our more modern sense per se, about Love, Dating, and Intimacy but a more classical sense of romanticism, the clubs he is passing are as he states this monologue during this segment are about frivolous and some would say pointless and nonsensical activities with very little practice purpose (Such as Fortune Telling), as opposed the Academics or Athletics. Which represent Diligent Study and Honed Talent respectively.
With that we have three pillars of what our Protagonist calls "A Rose Colored Life" he has directly rejected, re-enforced visually thought animation, coloring, and camera cuts.
As the series goes these three pillars, often in tandem with one another, will directly challenge the worldview of our protagonist.
As Oreki lays all this out, which is revealed as him chatting with his best friend (and only friend) Satoshi Fukube, he admits that such a life he seems to want to live (A Grey Life) does seem sad and lonely.
Of which his friend playfully chides him for it being self-destructive behavior. At this we are prompted for our main boys self proclaimed "motto"

"If I don't have to, I won't, If I have to, make it quick"

Choosing a life of so-called "energy conservation."
We also learn that the School Oreki attends is famous for their large selection of clubs despite how small and rural the region seems to be, he then defies his friends expectation by deciding to join the Classic Literature Club, strictly as a favor to his Elder Sister to keep her old club from closing down to lack of members.
Of course this still works out since as long as he basically squats in the Club Room it can serve as a personal space to laze about and not having to deal with others. As he is explaining to the audience he has nothing against people that expend energy but that it just "isn't for him" we see him go out of his way to wait outside until the teacher and a student leave the room to get the key as if too avoid a possible confrontation of needless interaction.
Then as we pass by a Janitor and we see he has to use his Key to unlock the room, we come across as what can only be described as the Quintessential Boy Meets Girl as a Young Wide-Eyed Raven Haired Beauty and Our Boy Look eyes for the first time.
With that two things happen.
One the OP by ChouCho, Yasashisano Riyuu plays.
Second, Hotaro's Energy Conservation Life is Now Doomed to come to an end.
Sadly this is not in the Crunchyroll Sub but Satoshi after making his (Not completely insincere) Joke about Oreki having a rendezvous with our Raven Haired Beauty, states his own motto

"A joke last a minute, if it continues longer it becomes a lie."

Keep that quote in mind.
From there Oreki despite his will, is utterly enchanted by his young girl, Eru Chitanda. Despite her being pushy, a little childish, and seemingly airheaded despite her excellent academic achievements, sharp senses, and impressive memory he can't help but expend his precious energy and show his talent, and what is going to be an established set-up in the series, His Deductive Reasoning.
Oreki ends up joining (Almost against his Will) and Satoshi apparently joins, with a knowing smile, to see how far the ship with go.
The Second Half Oreki basically invents a M\mystery to distract Chitanda from a true mystery. Claiming this way would require less energy expending due to the physical distance traveled, but Satoshi rightly points out that is complete bullshit, he could have just told Eru No. (Or as the Crunchyroll subs states claim "He Doesn't Know.")
And interesting way to translate that, one way to read it, is despite what he claims, he wanted to also show off for Eru even if he didn't want to put in the work to do so. Especially given Oreki's quote to Chi about the so-called "Spider Society" Freshmen.

"The inexperience can't help but want to show off"

which Satoshi throws back at him.
As a final note before the discussion questions. I love the visual of Oreki being visibly overwhelmed by the activity on the Bulletin Board, even before the letters consume him there is a de saturation and grainy effect on the visuals in the shots, before we are called back to the more crisp and neutral colored "real world."

Questions of the Day

To Clarify there will be three sets of Questions, One for First Timers, one for Rewatchers, and one for our few Source Readers, the latter two sets will be more often than not spoiler tagged, and be sure to spoiler tag your answers. Even some first timer questions being answered by our rewatches might need some tags. So bear that in mind.
QOTD
First Timers:

1. Its become a stable for loner snarky protagonist to give a similar speech. Such as Hachiman's "Youth is a Lie" or Tomozaki's "Life is an unfair game." I've often stated that such protagonists and set-ups took heavy inspiration from Hotaro Oreki and Hyouka and this show is responsible for popularizing the tropes and concepts. HOWEVER much like how Minecraft might had caused an explosion in building sandbox games and elements but it was itself borrowing elements from Dwarf Fotress and Infiniminer. What works do you think Hyouka is borrowing from?
   
2. Even Before Satoshi tells Eru that Oreki has a knack for solving things as opposed to he himself being a Database, Eru seems very determined to get Oreki to help her solve what happened with the locked door. Why do you think that is?
   
3. What exactly is Oreki "putting off" when he tricked Chitanda with the fake mystery? And what does it mean that he seems to realize that he is doing so, almost like an epitome.
   
4. What do you think of the OP? (We will talk about the ED tomorrow.)
   
5. Last Question for newcomers, in the ED and the next episode preview we are going to be introduced to a new girl, what do you think she is going to be like and what is her relationship to our other three cast members?
   

Rewatchers:

1. How does Satoshi's Line about Jokes and Misunderstands up above foreshadow what is going to happen later in the series?
   
2. Is there anything in the OP that you think has reference to what happens later in the series?
   
3. How well does this episode do in setting up [Spoilers]The Solution to the Mystery of the First Volume of the Anthology and the fate of Eru's Uncle ?
   

Source Readers:

1. In the Source Material there was [Spoilers]Less explicit romance between Oreki and Chitanda with various direction choices, visual imagery, and the fact that Oreki had already handed in his application rather than being under Eru's spell in handing it over personally in the anime Why do you think they changed that?
   
2. In General the Novels [Spoiler]Are much less explicit with the romance between Chitanda and Oreki, where one could argue its not even present in the first Novel and was only added in later Novels, do you agree? If Not why do you think there was a change? Was it planned from the start or did the author change their mind? In Either case why choose to do it this way or why the change of heart? Why did the anime make said romance more explicit?
   
3. This is the only episode where [Spoilers]They have content from both the first proper Novel and the Fourth Novel as a Collection of Side Stories due to the anime choosing to go Chronological If you watched this as an anime only once could you tell? How does it stand out from the rest of the series?
   
4. What other changes have been made in this first episode as opposed from the Novels, do you approve or disapprove of these changes? Why so?
   

See you on the Next Meeting of the Classic Lit Club!
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