There have been multiple arguments made by left-wing politicians as to why we need more immigrants and I will address some of the common ones.
“People do not want to work certain jobs that immigrants would happily do.”
People do not want to work these jobs because they pay nowhere near as much as they should or enough to be able to live comfortably. These jobs are usually blue collar, which increases your chance of injury and general health degradation. People should be paid very well and provided with health care instead of importing cheap labor.
“We need immigrants because our birth rates are too low.”
Birth rates in western nations are too low because people do not have enough money to have kids. Bringing in immigrants is a band-aid solution because they will not have enough money to have enough kids to keep birth rates stable. Meaning that we need even more immigrants later on. Also their kids will be encouraged to work different jobs by their parents meaning that there will still be a shortage of blue collar works. Instead, workers who are underpaid should get paid enough to comfortably have multiple children.
“There is a shortage of specialized workers.”
There is a shortage of companies willing to train employees. It’s that simple. But it costs money for the companies to train employees and they can pay immigrants less money.
“It’s racist and inconsiderate to not accept immigrants.”
It’s racist and inconsiderate to your nation’s citizens and marginalized communities to not create laws that force companies to match their employees salary with how much their productivity has increased over the past 50 or so years.

My mom's boyfriend is constantly yelling at her, my mom is crying every other night, she's 30 pounds underweight because of him. Im scared for my mom's health, but he doesnt care. He yells for hours on end and breaks stuff. Im so scared for my mom, tonight he grabbed her arm. I don't know what to do to help her, she wont give him an eviction notice, she wont file for a protection from harassment order. She wont help herself at all and I don't know how to help her, my sister tries but she just wont listen to us begging her to save herself from him by filing for a protection order.
He wont leave the house when told, he said 'no' when she said she wanted to break up, Im only 18 I don't know what to do. Im debating just refusing to let him in the house if he leaves but I don't know if thats a good idea or not. Legally he's an at will tenant here, and cops can't legally do anything. I want my mom safe and I don't know what to do.

The day seemed like it would be ordinary until the aeronautical community’s most sought after document showed up on my doorstep.
It came wrapped in brown kraft paper tied off with twine, and the exterior packaging had no return address nor any indication of a postage stamp. It was as though it had been simply bundled up and dropped into my wall-mounted mailbox by a random passerby.
No part of me was willing to surrender the strange parcel without opening it first. Regardless of who its contents truly belonged to, my eyes would be the first to see it. I removed the twine and then dug a thumb under a fold in the packaging paper before clawing it away to expose a brown tan notebook circa 1900. It was full grain buffalo leather with a crisscross of cord for the spine and a thick hand cut string keeping it sealed shut.
When I undid the string, the pages that had been gripped tight by the leather fanned out gently then returned to their original position, my eyes landing on the front page. It was without a printer’s mark and read in big handwritten type: “THE DIARY AND RECORD OF HENRY H. HELGELAND.”
I knew in that instant the package was in the hands of who it was rightfully sent out for. Not just because I’d recently lost my job as an associate at our city’s art museum but because of a separate, much deeper connection to the diary’s author.
Perhaps it’s in my best interests to turn it over to the National Archives, or the US Arctic Research Commission, or maybe even the U.S. Capitol Visitor Center, but at the risk of seeing it blue-penciled to death, I’ve elected to instead share it here and now.
The world needs to know what happened.
---
Henry H. Helgeland — my great grandfather — was a severe looking man with a walrus mustache and a bone to pick with anyone who ever doubted him. He was born in Oakland, California in 1871 and was, by all available accounts relayed to me, well-behaved and well-liked. His father worked a lucrative job in the shipping industry, transporting timber between San Francisco and the Central Valley. Two years into Henry’s life, his mother would contract a fatal case of diphtheria and die shortly thereafter; when he was old enough to understand what had happened, Henry “yearn[ed] fervently for a reunion to mend [his] great anguish and sorrow.”
Near the turn of the 20th century, Henry attended Stanford University’s Department of Mechanical Engineering, where he learned everything from thermodynamics to machine design. But it was a lecture about polar transportation that would ultimately kindle his interest in a separate enterprise: arctic exploration. Indeed, the race to the North Pole was well underway, with naval officers, geologists, and aeronauts around the globe vying for the chance to make history. My great grandfather, like many of his peers, propounded the theory that he, and he alone, would be the first to reach the Great White North.
In 1895, Henry graduated with a Bachelor of Science degree in mechanical engineering and sought to expand the member list of the so called Ascension Society, a student organization he’d assembled to aid engineering graduates with materials science. Many of its constituents had engaged in research projects and experimental setups to hone their craft of mechanical systems, but in time, however, the venture would instead prove a hotspot for investors and philanthropists. Donations averaging up to $5,000 helped fund and promote the fantastic ambitions of my great grandfather. So long as the Ascension Society was gracing him with their support, he’d be the first to reach the North Pole.
In early 1898, armed with enough capital, Henry used the proceeds to purchase the materials required for the balloon.
---
A notable circus at the forefront of traveling attractions in the early twentieth century was The Fielding Troupe. With its impressive lineup of talent — from fire eaters and aerialists to equestrians and strongmen — the ensemble drew crowds from nearly every town in western America during its historic run. Its wide reach would ultimately reel in many notable faces, including my great grandfather.
Prior to a performance in Oakland, the Fielding Troupe led a procession through the town around Stanford University, announcing their arrival with a parade of wagons, floats, and animals. The strategy, as it were, was to drum up as much publicity and fanfare as possible. Evidently it worked, as a healthy fraction of the faculty and student body at Stanford made the trip over to Oakland in order to see the troupe in action.
Surrounding their arena with two hundred feet of heavy duty tent canvas, the troupe put on a show for the ages the night Henry was in attendance, with extravagant acrobatics, trained animal performances, and a special appearance from Curtis the Clown. Following a skillful display of juggling and good natured audience ribbing, Curtis’s master stroke was an intricate stunt involving balloons and wire flying. Firstly, he would inflate several multi-colored balloons and tie them off with string, securing them firmly in his grip. They served as a flashy distraction from the piece of flexible metal snaking out from the harness he had concealed under his equally flashy costume. Then, with a whisper of strength, a couple stagehands hoisted the balloon-carrying clown thirty feet into the air to make it appear as though he was levitating by virtue of the balloons alone. A separate performer — a marksman — showed off his sharpshooting skills with a Winchester model rifle and gunned down the balloons, exploding each one as the stagehands loosened their hold on Curtis’s harness until he was eased to the ground.
Henry watched the routine with eager delight. Seeing Curtis the Clown float above a hundred or so onlookers helped stir within him a plan. The ceiling of the Big Top Tent where Curtis had concluded his ascent represented more than the centerpiece of a traveling circus.
“Ascendancy,” Henry muttered to his wife Ruth. “This is how we get to the top of the world.”
---
The spherical vessel measured sixty-five feet in diameter, with a capacity of over 200,000 cubic feet. Its construction was overseen by Henry and a couple french engineers who installed in its gondola three berths and ample ballast to keep it stable. The gondola, a carefully constructed assemblage of wicker and chestnut wood, was built as such to bar any interference to the magnetic instruments of the explorers. Keeping it shielded against severe weather conditions was a varnished silk calotte and a vaselined net composed of over four-hundred hemp cords. A bamboo pole was attached bellow the carrying ring to attach the side sails and, perhaps most notably, the balloon was fitted with hemp and cocoa nut fiber guide ropes to help steer and maintain a consistent altitude.
After two years of exhaustive construction, work on the balloon was completed in 1900. Henry named it Ascension, after the society that funded its creation.
---
What follows are several selected passages lifted directly from Henry’s memorandum, transcribed by me. The first entry reads:
“At nine o'clock on the forenoon, May 5, 1900, under the auspices of the Ascension Society, we embarked from the 71st parallel on our quest of the Pole. Our great journey sets off from Point Barrow, Alaska following a grueling adventure aboard the steamer Sursum. I, Henry Helgeland, travel forth, accompanied by Charles Ringvold, esteemed navigator, and Edward Meyer, long celebrated physician, into the arctic wilderness. Together, our efforts will generate a most formidable team and an unwavering spirit. We will ascend.”
Indeed, the SS Sursum disembarked from a port in San Francisco in mid May of that year; it offered easy access to the Pacific Ocean and sailed through the Bering Strait, covering over 3,000 nautical miles before reaching Point Barrow on July 2.
When the balloon took off, carried by a fierce north east wind, it was to a thunderous applause from those that had come to bear witness to the bold endeavor. Among them were crew members of the SS Sursum, high ranking associates of the Ascension Society, and carpenters tasked with helping the balloon reach its initial phase of liftoff.
As it elevated to 300 hundred feet and passed around an onlooking whaler, Henry was reported to have shouted: “To the top of the world, hurrah!”
---
36 hours would elapse before a second entry was made.
“July 4, 1900, Lat. 77° 48' N, Long. 143° 4' W. We are soaring at a height of 600 feet above the Earth's surface, traveling at a speed of approximately seven kilometers per hour. Our morale remains similarly aloft. Charles relayed to me that, God willing, we anticipate reaching the pole in roughly 800 miles. Beyond the drag ropes lending their ballast to our journey, optimism is our guiding force. We will ascend.”
Turbulent air currents had a different plan in mind, however.
“July 5, 1900, Lat. 80° 8' N, Long. 138° 37' W. Alas! Our aerial journey came to an abrupt halt yestereve on the 80th parallel. We voyaged as many as 500 miles before a forceful downdraft spun our vehicle on its vertical axle and compelled it into a sharp descent; we had lost what we estimate to be just over 100 cubic feet of gas.
“Edward suffered severe injuries during the initial impact and claims his vertebrae have been shattered, leaving him immobile. We’re at the mercy of the floe on which we now rest, at the mercy of the Polar Sea. Should we face the specter of death, we shall meet it with unwavering honor. We will ascend.”
---
“July 6, 1900. We find ourselves solitary in the barren expanse, accompanied only by bergs, ice-fields, and majestic glaciers. Our rations encompass a container’s worth of hardtack, enough salted beef for approximately one week, canned stew, dried apricots, some chocolate bars, and seven bottles of ale.
“Edward’s outlook remains grim; he suspects he’ll never walk again. In witness of his current state, I’m beginning to share in such apprehensions. Edward, whom we have reposed on on of our sledges, fears that the opportunity to make known the great love he holds for his mistress Rebecca is one he’ll never be granted. ‘You shall be reunited at once,’ I assured him. ‘Our journey to triumph will not be thwarted by minor inconveniences.’
“We’ve plotted the course to our next destination: that being Herschel Island, located off the coast of Canada in the Beaufort Sea. Charles — who shares in Edward’s dismay — estimates a three month footslog spanning just under one thousand miles is in store for us, perhaps more given Edward’s ailment. I am determined to see this mission to its completion, yet survival remains a paramount desire. Who’s to recount our extraordinary journey should we fail?
“While establishing our encampment and scouting the local flora of the area for additional sources of sustenance, I happened upon a plant of an unknown species. Half a meter tall, bulbous tubers, and thin roots terminating in clusters of white flowers; intuition suggests this is a water hemlock, which precludes it from edibility. Nevertheless, I shall regard this finding as one of great fortune. A portent of divine value. We will ascend.”
---
Two days later, gold prospectors off the Alaskan coast at Nome beach were in the process of emptying their sluice boxes when from the sky flew a carrier pigeon directly to their mining site. It bore a label with the inscription “Helgeland” and contained the following dispatch:
“July 7, 1900. First dog watch. Three southerly traveling carrier-pigeons were sent off at approximately 7 h. 40 p.m. Pacific Standard Time, the following among them. This is Rear Admiral Charles Ringvold of the United States Navy and the Helgeland Balloon Expedition of 1900. Our hopes of reaching the pole have been reduced to naught. Assistance urgently needed. Our destinies have hitherto been unknown, and now my fears have been actualized. GO IN TERROR OF HENRY HELGELAND. He is not who he proclaims to be. I volunteered for a man of honorable stature and venturesome drive. The man before me betrays neither.”
The remainder of the message was a hasty scrawl, decrypted only by the best in linguistics and modern codebreaking.
“UNASSISTED WE WILL PERISH HELPED WE WILL PERSEVERE PLEASE GOD HELP US HENRY WILL KILL US ALL DO NOT BELIEVE WHAT HE PROCLAIMS.”
The communication was immediately passed off to the Smithsonian Institution, where word fell within the earshot of Ascension Society proponents and additional members of the US Navy. A follow-up expedition — a rescue team led by Captain S. P. Matthews — was put together at once with the authorization of the Secretary of War.
Months later, after a congressional bill introduced to secure grant funding for arctic exploration — and thereby a rescue mission for Helgeland’s lost expedition — was successfully passed, the USS Greenwich departed from the San Francisco Naval Shipyard with a crew of thirty boatswains, medics, and deck officers among others.
What they would ultimately uncover puzzled them all.
---
“July 7, 1900. The team has fractured. We are without our provisions and without the morale that has served us thusly.
“Charles and I set upon the pursuit and capture of a walrus, a most strenuous task in the Arctic Circle. Furnished with a Winchester model .40-82, the sport skews in our favor but we are in no short supply of peril. These are one ton beasts with the strength of a hundred strongmen as they stave the ice, and yet it is not them I should have feared.
“’I can’t allow you to proceed further.’ I heard the click clack racket of the Winchester as Charles chambered a round and raised the rifle, training its twenty inch barrel toward my back after I had volunteered — quite ignorantly — to take the vanguard.
“’Charles?’ I managed between clattering teeth.
“’You’re a man of bold stature. An honorable man at that. But not honorable enough to die for. And that’s it, Henry. I will not die for you.’
“’You speak out of distress, not rationality.’
“’I’m as rational as one permits when I say we won’t all make it to Canada. You can’t expect us to sledge Edward for the next month and retain our strength. Our sanities.” I could hear him gulp, ‘our lives.’
“’You’re not who you say you are.’ I realized in that moment. ‘Not even an ensign would renounce his own crew. Who are you really, Charles?’
“His credentials were a farce; a clever scheme to scrape through the expedition’s vetting process. He was no navy-man nor expert nor navigator and if you piled his life’s accomplishments on top of one another, they’d be equal to that of a cretin.
“’Doesn’t matter any more, Henry.’
“’Then why haven’t you shot me?’
“I sensed beyond his terror a hint of reluctance and felt within him the trepidation of an amateur. The man had never wielded a firearm in his life and wouldn’t start hence.
“’In Your infinite mercy, hear my prayer. In Your boundless grace, grant me Your forgiveness,’ he muttered below his breath. I could’ve believed he’d have squeezed the trigger if not for the unexpected convulsion that suddenly brought him to his knees. Befallen by the strange attack, Charles unhanded the Winchester and collapsed to the ice in the midst of a crippling seizure. And in a matter of moments, he had succumbed to death.
“With some activated charcoal or perhaps an emetic, he could have eluded such a painful demise. I stepped over to look upon his body, his pupils dilated to the size of dimes. Reviewing the immediate symptoms, intuition tells me he’s become the latest victim of hemlock poisoning, the kind of amateur mistake I’d expect from someone such as Charles. Ideal timing, if I may speak candidly.
“Hope remains alive. I will ascend.”
---
Investigators with the crew of S. P. Matthews found everything except answers.
It took them all of three months to zero in on the campsite left behind by Helgeland’s expedition. Any prospect of finding the balloon itself was dropped by the wayside to preserve manpower and time.
The camp was discovered on the 79th parallel, not in any particular state of disarray but with enough evidence to suggest conflict had broken out between the members. Edward was discovered in a tent with the rest of the rations and a bullet hole stamped in the side of his head. There was no telling how long he’d been dead for.
Forty-five meters away from the camp, buried under a stalagmitic gathering of ice and snow, was the body of Charles Ringvold. A followup inquiry would prove my great grandfather’s claims that he was a fraud, but like Charles himself, the truth is buried deep under the surface. Edward and Charles are commemorated for their failed — albeit honorable — efforts in the face of great opposition.
The body of my great grandfather, however, was never found. Theories thus abound in the saga of Henry H. Helgeland and we are no more the wiser now than we were a century ago. He is remembered for murdering his men in cold blood, deserting them, and then yielding to the elements somewhere in the frozen hell of the arctic. The carrier-pigeon message sent by Charles corroborated the apparent facts.
But I know the truth. Because only I have the answers.
“July 8, 1900. All that remains is me, for everyone else has vanished. Edward and I regaled each other with stories of our mistresses as night fell upon our place in the arctic wasteland. Rebecca, Edward’s beloved, works as an expert seamstress in San Francisco and will no doubt be devastated when news of his fate reaches her. But the great memories they shared together, I assured him, will serve her well in the years to come.
“‘You shall be reunited at once,’ I whispered to him once more before executing the dying man with the Winchester. It is my turn to face whatever awaits me on the ice.
“My great anguish and sorrow have been mended.
“Ruth is calling to me now. Our son promptly requires our presence.
“I shall go to them."
The fruitless search for my great grandfather peaked at last with the unearthing of a path of footprints snaking away from the tent where Edward’s body lay. Investigators followed them for approximately ten meters before they abruptly ceased. Captain Matthews is quoted as saying: “it was as though the walker had simply floated away.”
And indeed, it was our family that won in the end, for my great grandfather received exactly what he wanted. The final, undated entry of his diary is comprised of but three simple words:
“I have ascended.”

My health has been in a slow decline throughout my adult life I used to be pretty athletic. I used to do martial arts, swimming, running, and biking, and I was sharp too. I got A's in university both when I was studying the humanities, and when I switched to a field involving a lot of programming.
It started with depression, anxiety, and insomnia. So, when I started developing severe systematic pain, stiffness, and exhaustion, the doctors didn't take it seriously. The pain was worst in the beginning. I was bedridden for stretches, but gradually saw improvement with improved ergonomics, stretching, exercise, lower stress, improved posture, and a change in sleeping position, and psych medication--not that it was trivial maintaining such a disciplined regimen. Over time though, my body was still getting worse. A doctor finally diagnosed me with fibromyalgia.
Three years ago, I was also diagnosed with ankylosing spondylitis. My spine is fusing together and causing a bunch of the systematic pain and inflammation issues I'd been experiencing, but I had the fibro-fog really bad, so it seemed like I had both. Looking at the symptom list though, I'm wondering if chronic fatigue might better explain my other symptoms.
Certainly, the way I'm all but bedridden for days with flu-like symptoms every time I jump on a bike for a wimpy beginning of the season ride just to start getting back in shape fits that bill, or the way I'll be sick with a cold for a month at a time. It all started when I'd get migraines after exercising for two or three hours... But over the years, the threshold before hitting migraine territory has only shrunk. Today, I get too tired too quickly to exert myself enough to get migraines. Literally everything is exhausting--the usual housework, yes, but also the things I LOVE doing--writing, painting, programming, reading novels, listening to music... If I want to get anything done I literally have to take Ritalin just for the basic attention necessary to blank out.
So how can I know whether it's fibromyalgia, or if it's chronic fatigue? In my area, given my lack of social capital, my doctor essentially doesn't care. In her eyes, it doesn't make any difference.
... Also, what do you do with your life when can't do any of the things you like? I'm on disability and don't have to work, which makes things barely livable, along with having a good spouse, but otherwise, I haver a serious eye on my country's Medical Assistance in Dying.

What is the most meaningful experience you have had while practicing self-care or taking care of your mental health?

I don't know why this whole debate has to be an "either-or" thing.
I'm gay. It's nasty out there for us sometimes. Most LGBT just want to live their lives, get married, adopt a few kids that need adopting, etc. Yet we're still somehow debating whether being gay is some abhorrent mental illness, if gays should be allowed to adopt, etc.
I'm also a man. I have the privilege as a gay dude that I can hang with the girls safely without any pretext, and even that's enough to know that men (particularly straight men) kind of have it rough. Society says that men can't express their feelings or demonstrate weakness; men get beat up with shit jobs. Women routinely, and not entirely politely ask or tell me to "use my man strength" to help lift boxes or do labors at work and elsewhere. I've had my problems dismissed outright. I've been sexually assaulted -- by men sometimes, sure, but also plenty of women -- and I've been laughed at.
Black people have had a rough go of it. Listen to your black friends; they experience their world a little differently, but it's enough to be different sometimes. I've always lived in lower income areas that are predominantly black, and I've been surrounded by that culture. I'm also white. In the above case, I also got shit on for being white. It created the perception of weakness, of "vanilla-ness". I lacked "culture". Casual racism against whites has been normalized in many ways, even if all of us in those neighborhoods were bound by a commonality of being low-income.
The point is, we've all got problems. Focusing on one set of problems does not mean that we don't care about another set of problems. All of us are a part of multiple groups; this is what intersectionality really means. Being in a majority doesn't make anyone's problems less valid, it's just that being in a minority group makes it easier to be discriminated against or mistreated.
Human rights and improvement of our collective lives isn't a zero-sum game. We can address the problems that exist for various groups regardless of whether they are a minority or a majority in society. We can't talk about them all at once, of course; that's why you've got groups that advocate for LGBT rights, groups for Men's Rights and mental health advocacy, Black Lives Matter and similar affiliates, etc.
By recognizing that we've all got problems and we can all help each other improve our conditions by working to fix those issues, we can create a freer and better society.

I’ve posted in here before and you guys were super helpful and a lot of the threads I read have lots of info so I figure, while I’m thinking about it, I’ll ask.
I have never ENJOYED being active. I hate feeling sweaty, I hate the jittery feeling, I hate the soreness afterward. For a good 6-8 months a few years ago, my husband and I were lifting weights in our garage and I had gotten up to a 90lb deadlift, was able to carry 40lb bags of dog food and 30+ bottle cases of water by myself. Mind you, I’m 5’1”. Then I had an incident where I passed out, threw up ( I’m emetophobic ) and I immediately quit after that. In 2021 I walked with my mom multiple times a week but then at the end of 2021 I got Covid. After I recovered, I was winded walking down the halls of my house, taking a shower, you name it. Since then, I’ve basically completely refused to move because even walking around the store for an hour grocery shopping spikes my heart rate and breathing. My therapist and my husband both want to get me back into at LEAST walking but the moment I feel my heart and breathing rate increase, pounding behind my chest, I immediately get anxious about my heart seizing up and it makes it all worse.
Any tips for getting back into being active again? I’ve developed serious heart and health anxiety after a new palpitation two and a half weeks ago to the point where I feel like I am going to die every day of my life and it absolutely terrifies me. I know being active is healthy but I can’t get past the idea that I’ll pass out or die from my heart rate getting too high. They tell me to take it slow but again, even doing chores around the house scares me, I can only do a little bit at a time.
I’m waiting on a cardiologist referral, but my primary care physician says everything with my heart sounds and looks just fine.
Thank you all.

Hello! I am a employee of a non corporate Starbucks that is inside a Target shopping center. So I technically work for target and get Target benefits. However a bunch of things have been happening since I was hired 11 months ago.
So my main team lead for Starbucks (we can call her bossy), doesn’t know how to do her job. That’s right, she has worked at the SAME position for 25+ years and doesn’t know how to do her job (that’s not even the worse part). Just today she clocked out of her shift 20 mins early without telling ANYONE! Then she went to sit with her friends as I am now by myself struggling to make and take orders with a long line with about a 20 min wait time. Bossy and her friends just WATCHED me struggle with the orders. She never told me why she clocked out early even, she was NO WHERE NEAR overtime for the week. Besides that, she left us alone off and on four times for a total of 3ish hours. Didn’t have a reason but “emails”. My other team leads said it only takes 20 mins PER WEEK to work on emails, she takes 2+ hours PER DAY, and she won’t say when she is leaving to do it. If I ask where she was, she just says emails and not to worry.
She also doesn’t give us barista’s free drinks or food, yet claims to her Starbucks bosses that she does. Since I’ve been hired, I’ve never gotten a free drink from her, she is supposed to be doing it more often, but doesn’t. Even worse though, us baristas are NOT allowed to have water on hand. By state law we are supposed to have a designated area for water to go. We do not have one, we brought this up to her and Bossy ignored us. So we are LUCKY if we get to drink ANYTHING between breaks (about 4 hours), and our Target isn’t cooling off fast enough to beat the heat, so it’s humid and hot inside the store. We brought this up to a higher team lead and they also ignored us. Hell, even HR ignored me!
Now the team lead above bossy and is the front of the store team lead who is responsible for scheduling (let’s call him EL for entitled leader), has refused me to be trained in other parts of the store. I’ve been BEGGING for 2 months to be trained in ANY position and no longer work Starbucks, and that I don’t care where and I won’t complain. Plus we are in dire need of staff however the store refuses to hire new people and instead burns out it’s own employees. He moved me to lanes 2 times, other then that I’ve only been in Starbucks. I tried asking again and he ignored me. There is 3 team lead positions opening up within the next 2 weeks and I feel like if I ask they won’t allow me to apply just because. ALSO EL hates giving vacation time or days of, even though your not available that day for whatever reason, he will still put you on the schedule. I requested a weekend off 2 months in advance, and he kept denying it for no reason.
I wish there were other jobs near by that paid as much or better then Target, but none of them come close, and as a person finishing high school, I prefer a higher paying job. However the management at Target, in the part of the store where I work, is so bad I want to quit.
ALSO!!!! Almost all of the baristas are DRAMA! And I’ve been so mistreated over my mental and physical health that I can’t take it. As a person who gets triggered and can easily get panic attacks I did warn them that if I run to the back randomly I just need a min. One time I did that after a miserable week, I ran to the back struggling to breathe. One barista that was about to clock out for lunch turned around, looked at me, and said, “What the f*ck is wrong with you?!” I slowly said panic attack through gasps and shaking and all she said was “Well get back to work then, it’s not that bad.” HUH!? I’m barely able to stand in front of you, wdym?
There is another barista that makes fun of me because I can’t spell names for the life of me. So I often ask customers to spell it for me and I always hear behind me, then spelling it super slow interrupting the customer as they are making drinks.
Now, is this normal and I’m frustrated over nothing, or are my feelings accurate. Cause to me it’s EXTREMELY infuriating.

[M]/Doing retro just in case, coz it took me much longer to lay this out lol/[M]

Canadian Federal Elections 101

Canada has inherited its political system from the United Kingdom, sticking to Westminster parliamentary system ever since. This means, that unlike in the United States, the outcome of Canadian elections are won by whichever party manages to elect the greatest number on Member of Parliament to the House of Commons of Canada, allowing the leader of this party to assume the office of Prime Minister.

The Senate of Canada provides for a stark contrast, since despite being originally designed to ensure provincial representation, the upper house remains unelected and is largely subjected to the politics in the House of Commons.

When no party is able to secure more than 50 per cent of seats in the House, a leader of a political party that is able to command more than 50 per cent of MPs, for example through singing supply and confidence or coalition agreements with other parties, becomes Prime Minister instead. Historically, however, the largest party in the House of Commons tends to form a monitory government, when it commands a plurality of MPs, rather than an outright majority. This allows the largest party to remain in power, but it has to rely on MPs from other political factions to pass crucial pieces of legislation, especially when it comes to votes that indicate parliamentary confidence, such as federal budgets. Losing those votes, would effectively mean that the current government has to either be completely re-staffed with new Cabinet Ministers, or call a snap election.
However, minority governments remained fairly uncommon in Canada, since the current voting system, called First-Past-the-Post (FPTP), allows for individual MPs to win their respective ridings - also known as constituencies - to be elected into the House of Commons with a simple plurality of votes. Thus, a political party can win most seats in the House of Commons through strategically placing their bets on ridings with very tight margins, where just one extra vote may allow their nominee to win a permanently seat, effectively making all votes for the opposition candidate in that riding meaningless.

General Backgrounder

For example, the Liberal Party of Canada has won the last two federal elections with a plurality of seats in the House of Commons, despite coming only 2nd to the Conservative Party of Canada during popular vote. The Liberals, despite becoming the largest party in the House still fell short of winning the majority of seats, being forced to rely on the New Democratic Party, that represented are more progressive social democratic part of the electorate, for crucial votes. Later, the Government has called a snap election aiming to get their desired majority, but failed, and had to sign a formal Supply and Confidence Agreement with the NDP, that included a massive package of social programmes, such as the recently implemented national dental care and prescription drug insurance.
However, while enjoying a steady lead in polls vis-a-vis, the federal Conservatives during the pandemic, the Liberals had experienced persistent slump as post-pandemic recovered coupled with sticky inflation and rapidly deteriorating housing crisis. As the Federal Conservatives have moved to the right following the election of a new leader, they have utilised concurrent economic challenges and liberal economic policy, blaming the current government's pandemic related emergency spending coupled with expansion of social programs as the root cause for inflation into collapsing housing affordability. As Canada had to respond to America's Inflation Reduction Act with a new public investment into green transition, conservative criticism of the Trudeau government has become ever more vocal, with fiscal deficits presumably exacerbating, concurrent inflationary pressures.
Liberal policies, especially introducing the federal backstop mechanism for carbon pricing, has also spurred, vicious opposition, among Conservatives, especially those living in the Western Canada, that culminated in the razor-thin re-election of the United Conservatives in the oil-producing province of Alberta. The federal response to the freedom, convoy protest, as well as the general push, forever wider collective community during the pandemic, has created some fertile soil for the opposition, Conservatives to capitalise on, especially as the more moderate leader of the party had been ousted shortly after the convoy protest.
After more than eight years in government, the liberal party has also been embroiled in several corruption and ethics candles, including the SNC-Lavallin affair, the pandemic-era ArriveCan App scandal, and, most recently, the accusations of Chinese electoral interference, and Chinese police stations operating in Canada.
In fact, the situation for the current government has become so dire. It's a point, but more than 80% of forecasters projected a Conservative minority government has the most probable outcome for the next election. According to some polls, the Liberals would be unable to form a government, even with the support of the New Democratic Party. The liberal convention in late spring 2023, didn't provide much of a relief either, how's the party continued to lack a comprehensive platform to combat the issue of housing and affordability - something that steadily climbed the rate of priorities for many Canadians, to become the most pressing issue, when deciding who to vote for. If anything, the Conservative party has become the most popular political force, among younger Canadians, with their laser, sharp focus on the issue of inflation and housing affordability.
The issue of housing affordability has become central to the Conservative Convention, where the Party has committed to "restoring" home ownership across the country, through planning laws deregulation and "removing resections on the supply of housing". This would see the federal government to tie federal spending on housing to municipalities shortening approval times, waive HST/GST for housing, as well as allow landlords to re-invest their profits into new housing tax-free. The Conservative convention also proposed federal infrastructure funding to be linked to higher-density housing construction.
What did, however, play in favour of the current government, what is the time. Within Canadian Parliamentary system, the Prime Minister can call an election effectively anytime, so long their term doesn't exceed the four year threshold, that was approaching at Fall 2025, supported by the Supply and Confidence Agreement with New Democrats. As inflation in North America has started slowly subsiding to return to the 2% target in early fall 2024, Trudeau has managed to re-gain some the economic credibility his government has seemingly lost. The Liberals have also continued their tilt to make some inroads into the NDP camp, with the Federal Budget 2024 going heavily on Net Zero and Green Transition.
However, the Liberals also had to deal with a political deadline, whether to call and election before or after the Budget 2025 would've been published. The former might allow the LPC to avoid the criticism of "buying up votes" that the party received after calling the snap election shortly after introducing their Federal Budget in 2021. However, Trudeau also had a stake at deferring the election for long as possible, hoping that waiving inflationary pressure might open up more space for the Liberals to re-gain the economic ground over the Conservatives.

Federal Election 2025

After long deliberation, the federal Cabinet has opened to hold an election in late March 2025, right at the time when a government would have normally tabled their budget. The election that both the Liberals and the Conservatives have approached after almost a year or neck-and-neck perforce in the polls, with Trudeau having a minuscule advantage in personal ratings.
The economy, especially housing affordability, have become two main issues during this election, closely followed by healthcare - namely access to family physicians and waiting times for selected procedures - and the issue of inflation still lingering at the back of the public debate.
Trudeau himself because a matter for the debate, with the Liberals banking on his personal likability, while Federal Conservatives continuously pressed with corruption and ethical scandals and corruption allegations, combined with the Liberal campaign continuously bringing up the "electability issue" of their opponents.

Housing

With the Tories enjoying slight lead on the matter of economic competence, the Liberals opted to treat the housing crisis as a matter of social policy, while banking heavily on personal popularity of Trudeau himself. From the policy-standpoint, LPC Election Platform has effectively copied the proposal originally voiced during the Conservative Convention. Namely, waiving GST/HST for housing construction, allowing landlords to re-invest their profits into constructing more units tax-free, as well as linking federal spending to new housing development and liberalising permitting process. The difference with the Conservatives was the focusing on new federal spending to combat housing affordability.
Liberal election promises involved the commitment for new federal housing construction to exceed population growth by the end of the first term, through the government directly contracting private developers to build more affordable housing, and task the Canada Infrastructure Development Corporation to provide funding to non-market housing in numbers meeting or exceeding population growth in larger metropolitan areas on Toronto, Vancouver, Calgary, Montreal, and across Atlantic Canada.
Unlike the Tories, Trudeau also went further, promising the government would cover development charges for projects that included affordable housing. The Liberals have also committed to conducting of affordable rental housing, aimed at younger Canadians and those who are yet to start cloning the property ladder. Conservatives on the other hand emphasised Trudeau's poor track on housing affordability, combined focusing on making home ownership more affable through market-driven construction of new units for sale.
Both Team Blue and Team Red have committed to expediting the arrival of new skilled trades professionals, especially those working in the housing sector, including interest-free loans to have their qualifications recognised or to up-skill their existing credentials. Liberals however, took a step further, promising automatic Permanent Residency who has worked in residential construction after 1 year, as well issuing Open Work Permits - exempt from the Labour Market Impact Assessment - to anyone with construction work experience willing to come to Canada, so long they continue working in the construction sector for the majority of their time before obtaining permanent residency. The Tories on their part suggested granting PR automatically after they've worked in construction for at least 5 years.
On the matter of banning foreign buyers, both parties have committed to banning home purchases in Canada for those who do not hold Canadian citizenship or are not Permanent Residents of Canada, with Liberals maintaining existing exemptions, so long the person buying has invested an equivalent amount in affordable housing construction.
Rhetorically, the Liberals have echoed the National Housing Act 1938, suggesting their government would run fiscal deficits to finance nation-wide home construction, especially affordable rental units. CPC has openly accused Trudeau of "policy stealing" choosing to emphasis permitting deregulation, subsidies for new units, and investing more construction professionals.

Healthcare & Social Care

Federal Conservatives have focused their attack in increasing waiting times, as well as increasing shortage of medical professionals across the country. Liberals, however, aimed to conservative proposals to introduce more private providers into the system, while emphasising their expansion of public health insurance that now covers both dental care and prescription drugs. Both parties suggested increasing the immigration intake for doctors, nurses, medical researches, providing financial support to have their credentials recognised in Canada as well as to update their skills.
The Liberals have however suggested lowering tuition rates international students who come to study health, social care, and eduction, granted them access to domestic rates of tuition, as well as a designated pathway to Permanent Residency for health, eduction, and social care who have obtained at least 1560 hours of Canadian work experience, and received at least part of their eduction in Canada. This would come as a supplementary measure, with domestic students becoming eligible for federal student loan write off if they have accumulated at least 1 year of post-graduation work experience in health, social care, or education - so long their degree is in the same field.
The Liberals have also committed to covering a Royal Commission to introduce a national social care insurance programme for seniors and people with disabilities.

The Economy

The Conservatives suggest introducing "full expensing" allowing companies to deduct up 120 per cent of their expenses on machinery, equipment, and non-residential property, akin to UK's Super Deduction, to combat Canada's low investment levels. They also propose to introduce tax credits for Canadian companies to up-skill their workers, as well as increased federal funding to provinces to support job training and second career programmes and labour market integration.
The Liberals suggest increasing the minimum wage in federally-regulated institutions, linking as a proportion of executive pay. LPC also pledged to introduce at least 4 weeks of paid vacation after 1 year on employment, with additional increases in line with employee tenure, as outlined in their Convention 2023, while brining paid leave of up to 6 weeks a year, allowing recipients to tradition onto disability payments after that.
Both parties have committed to supporting Employee Ownership Trusts, as well as introduction of worker representation on corporate boards in federally-regulated industries. Team Red however to it a step further, suggesting they will employee ownership mandatory for large corporations , with the only exemption provided for profit-sharing schemes.
Both parties have also supported reforming Canada's Employment Insurance Program:
The Conservatives suggest introducing Individual EI Savings Accounts that any Canadian can access whenever they are let go of their job or decide to quit. The proposed accounts would be funded through mandatory employer and employee contributions and could also be used to pay for labour training and re-skilling, with means-tested federal assistance available for those who's exhausted their accounts. Tories also suggest expanding current marginal earnings projection to apply to both individual and household income. The party also suggests waiving EI Premiums and provide rebates for C/QPP Contribution rebates to those not paying federal income tax, to guarantee every Canadian can earn at least $1000 a month free of payroll deductions.
Trudeau on the other hand suggested making EI coverage universal, and providing up to 90 per cent wage replacement in the first month of claim, while also introducing EI Benefit Floor, where every Canadian would be entitled to a minimum benefit equal to federal minimum wage regardless of their original earnings, for as long as they have enough insurable hours. The Liberal plan also introduces expands "working while on claim" provision, allowing people collecting EI benefits to have their wages supplemented through the program so their total paycheque reaches at least 90 per cent of their average 5-year earnings at all times, regardless whether the claimant is eligible for EI Regular Benefits. EI Parental Benefits are set to be fixed at at least 60 per cent of the family's income, subject o the benefit floor. Liberals suggest paying for the programme through waiving maximum insurable earnings to levy EI Premiums on all income of an individual, while introducing cap on benefits linked to median regional wages. However, the basic exemption shall be aligned to the federal income tax minimum threshold. Surpluses generated should be used to pay for expanded WWoC provisions and putting EI Operating Account back into surplus.
Both parties also committed to brining in a Canada Savers' Credit that mirrors both the amounts and eligibly criteria of the GST/HST tax credit, but is instead deposited in people's Tax Free Savings Accounts (TFSAs) and automatically invested into corporate equity. Tories and Liberals also support introducing automatic enrolment for Registered Retirement Savings Plans (RRSPs), Registered Eduction Savings Plans (RESPs), Registered Disability Savings Plans (RDSP), First Homebuyer Savings Accounts (FHSAs) and TFSAs upon either birth of obtaining Canadian tax residency for eligible non-Canadians. While the Conservative proposal would new accounts automatically linked to existing financial institutions the individual already has an account in, the Liberals instant new accounts should be automatically assigned to a new independent crown corporation, so long the primary account holder haven't decided to the move their registered accounts to an eligible financial institution.
Both parties pitch the policy as a potential interim solution to address Canada's sky-high household debt, through increased asset ownership and participation in stock markets.
When it comes to fiscal policy, the Liberal Government suggests they'll keep their "structural deficit" - as defined by tax revenues versus programme expedites - bellow the rate of economic growth over the 10 year period. LPC however is open they'll not restrain their spending on new housing construction, Ottawa set to absorb almost all the costs of housing under the liberal plan. The Conservatives on the other hand suggest introducing the $1 for $1 rule for federal expenditure, where every dollar of new spending has to be offset by a dollar in spending cuts or increased taxes, suggesting to balance the budget in their first 5 years in the office.
Somewhat comically, the Liberals seem to be attacking Conservative proposals on the grounds it may bring back the pain on the nighties - referring to the Chretien austerity era - especially in Atlantic Canada and the Regions of Quebec where benefit dependency ratios have traditionally been elevated.
The Liberals have also committed to expand existing childcare agreements, to make childcare services and spare available to anyone, and drastically reduce wait times for subsidised spots.

Energy & Environment

The issue has surprisingly played a somewhat muted role during this election, as CPC has contained to opposed federal price on carbon, pressuring the idea of turning Canada into a "natural resource superpower". Liberals on the other hand boasted about their massive investment into Net Zero Transition, while also attacking the Tories one potential fiscal penalties that the government would assume after cancelling the carbon tax. Team Red had also opened to cling to previous commitments of the Conserve Leader to ban overseas oil, which Ontario, and Quebec, as well as Atlantic Canada remain fairly dependent on, due to lack of oil transportation infrastructure from western oil production facilities. Considering the fact Quebec has remained one of Liberal strongholds even at the lowest, as well as the party's perceived electability in the province, CPC would've had even harder to fight for the votes in Quebec.

Tipping the Scales

However, what truly decided this election, was something that may in the future divide the country even more, namely the issue of the French language. Something that has been present in Canadian politics for generations, but something that this time brought a party over the finish line, while completely tanking their opponents.
While both leaders fluent in French, having French Canadian roots, combined with an almost unchallenged dominance of the local Bloc Québécois, it seemed quite unlikely either party would be able to gain any meaningful advantage in Quebec, until both parties have revealed their election manifestos.
Here was the moment the Liberals played their cards best. Namely, the party has committed to supplying French language both within and outside Quebec, through drastically bolstering access to Francophone eduction across the country. The Liberals has committed to introducing a brand-new federal agency tasked with facilitating access to French eduction and integration services - Francisation Canada.
The agency was set to provide free-at-use eduction in French, while also providing up to $1000 a month in finical assistance to immigrants who were willing to learn French. On top of that, the Liberals have committed to make existing Explore and Odyssey Programme universal, integrating them into school curriculums across the country. The Party has also committed to negotiating bilateral agreements with all provinces to provide additional funding and guarantee access to services, including eduction in French across Canada, while making French a mandatory subject for Early Learning & Childcare, as well as in secondary education. LPC would also waive tuition fees for post-secondary eduction in French, and negotiate agreements with other francophone countries, to facilitate French-speaking immigration into Canada and Quebec.

Conclusion

Thus, on the night of the election, the sudden realisation waived through the country. The Liberal Party managed to protect their urban ridings, even in West, as their pledge to "spend whether it takes to make houses and rents affordable for everyone" managed to persuade swing urban voters across the country, combined with their massive investment in green transition. The Tories has also lost their lead in Atlantic Canada, where an idea of a massive EI expansion has resonated with voters much more than the concept of individual accounts. Massive subsidies in battery production have also helped the Liberals to protect their seats across Ontario, especially in former industrial towns. However, what actually brought Trudeau over the finish line, was Quebec. The Combination of absolutely massive investments into green tech, coupled with new social programs, and proposed childcare expansion, on top of the Liberal pledge to "protect and promote the French language from Coast to Coast to Coast" allowed the party to make some significant inroads across the province, despite loosing some suburban ridings, Central Canada gave Trudeau yet another chance to form yet another minority Liberal government.
​

Party Name	Popular Vote	Seats in the House of Commons of Canada
Liberal Party of Canada (LPC)	33.8%	158
Conservative Party of Canada (CPC)	35.8%	140
New Democratic Party (NDP)	19%	20
Bloc Québécois (BQ)	6.2%	21
People's Party of Canada	1,5%	0

​

Acknowledgements

• https://energynow.ca/2022/04/energy-east-will-not-live-again-heres-why-jean-francois-thibault/
• https://2023.liberal.ca/policy/
• https://macleans.ca/politics/ottawa/erin-otoole-socialist-crusade
• https://www.cbc.ca/news/politics/grenier-election-results-1.5330105
• https://tnc.news/2022/03/25/pierre-poilievre-proposes-ban-on-foreign-oil-within-five-years/
• https://nationalpost.com/news/why-does-pierre-poilievre-appeal-to-young-canadians-its-all-about-economics-2
• https://www.theglobeandmail.com/politics/article-conservatives-more-trusted-than-liberals-to-manage-federal-finances/
• https://centre.irpp.org/research-studies/amending-the-official-languages-act-a-new-vision-of-bilingualism/
• https://energynow.ca/2022/04/energy-east-will-not-live-again-heres-why-jean-francois-thibault/
• https://tnc.news/2022/06/22/poilievre-pay-as-you-go/
• https://www.ctvnews.ca/politics/where-the-six-conservative-leadership-candidates-stand-on-key-policy-issues-1.5888530
• https://newsinteractives.cbc.ca/elections/federal/2021/party-platforms/
• https://338canada.com/sim.htm

40 year old woman with two boys on the spectrum, the worlds laziest husband, three terminal illnesses, & a ridiculous number of health problems. I have endured one traumatic, horrific situation after another since 2017, and I’m just exhausted. For three years I’ve begged my husband for support and to help me out around the house and getting healthier. He’s a nurse I want to point out. So when I originally got sick he quit his job to care for me. He did wonderful for about six months and then he just stopped giving me my meds, cooking my meals, or helping me in any way. I was so sick I almost died. I was bedridden at the time so what he did to me was beyond cruel. Then he decided to go back to work to care for others and leave me to fend for Myself. I was so sick and weak that I just focused on survival: it wasn’t until later that I realized the severity of what happened. I’m too sick to leave but I know I can never heal in this environment. He controls me by not giving me access to a vehicle so I’m pretty much a prisoner in my home. There are no resources for victims of narcisstic abuse. I can’t go to my family because they are equally abusive and honestly don’t care about my life. They are too busy living theirs. I’m so scared if something doesn’t change I won’t survive. And I have felt so invisible since I got sick, life can feel so hopeless. I just want a real chance at living. The way I have been treated and what i’ve endured is mind blowing. I truly believe nobody cares about me anymore. And i’m here I guess, in hopes that maybe somebody will care and get mad about this horrific set of circumstances with me. And it really think I need that right now. Xoxo

Hello! I am a employee of a non corporate Starbucks that is inside a Target shopping center. So I technically work for target and get Target benefits. However a bunch of things have been happening since I was hired 11 months ago.
So my main team lead for Starbucks (we can call her bossy), doesn’t know how to do her job. That’s right, she has worked at the SAME position for 25+ years and doesn’t know how to do her job (that’s not even the worse part). Just today she clocked out of her shift 20 mins early without telling ANYONE! Then she went to sit with her friends as I am now by myself struggling to make and take orders with a long line with about a 20 min wait time. Bossy and her friends just WATCHED me struggle with the orders. She never told me why she clocked out early even, she was NO WHERE NEAR overtime for the week. Besides that, she left us alone off and on four times for a total of 3ish hours. Didn’t have a reason but “emails”. My other team leads said it only takes 20 mins PER WEEK to work on emails, she takes 2+ hours PER DAY, and she won’t say when she is leaving to do it. If I ask where she was, she just says emails and not to worry.
She also doesn’t give us barista’s free drinks or food, yet claims to her Starbucks bosses that she does. Since I’ve been hired, I’ve never gotten a free drink from her, she is supposed to be doing it more often, but doesn’t. Even worse though, us baristas are NOT allowed to have water on hand. By state law we are supposed to have a designated area for water to go. We do not have one, we brought this up to her and Bossy ignored us. So we are LUCKY if we get to drink ANYTHING between breaks (about 4 hours), and our Target isn’t cooling off fast enough to beat the heat, so it’s humid and hot inside the store. We brought this up to a higher team lead and they also ignored us. Hell, even HR ignored me!
Now the team lead above bossy and is the front of the store team lead who is responsible for scheduling (let’s call him EL for entitled leader), has refused me to be trained in other parts of the store. I’ve been BEGGING for 2 months to be trained in ANY position and no longer work Starbucks, and that I don’t care where and I won’t complain. Plus we are in dire need of staff however the store refuses to hire new people and instead burns out it’s own employees. He moved me to lanes 2 times, other then that I’ve only been in Starbucks. I tried asking again and he ignored me. There is 3 team lead positions opening up within the next 2 weeks and I feel like if I ask they won’t allow me to apply just because. ALSO EL hates giving vacation time or days of, even though your not available that day for whatever reason, he will still put you on the schedule. I requested a weekend off 2 months in advance, and he kept denying it for no reason.
I wish there were other jobs near by that paid as much or better then Target, but none of them come close, and as a person finishing high school, I prefer a higher paying job. However the management at Target, in the part of the store where I work, is so bad I want to quit.
ALSO!!!! Almost all of the baristas are DRAMA! And I’ve been so mistreated over my mental and physical health that I can’t take it. As a person who gets triggered and can easily get panic attacks I did warn them that if I run to the back randomly I just need a min. One time I did that after a miserable week, I ran to the back struggling to breathe. One barista that was about to clock out for lunch turned around, looked at me, and said, “What the f*ck is wrong with you?!” I slowly said panic attack through gasps and shaking and all she said was “Well get back to work then, it’s not that bad.” HUH!? I’m barely able to stand in front of you, wdym?
There is another barista that makes fun of me because I can’t spell names for the life of me. So I often ask customers to spell it for me and I always hear behind me, then spelling it super slow interrupting the customer as they are making drinks.
Now, is this normal and I’m frustrated over nothing, or are my feelings accurate. Cause to me it’s EXTREMELY infuriating.

So we have been operating under the assumption/suspicion that I have endo for a few years now, but there has been no "smoking gun" in imaging. One ultrasound found a complex cyst that has not been seen again, that was years ago. Another saw what they thought was maybe a fibroid. Other than that, nothing. The last experience I had was so demoralizing and upsetting I have avoided doctors for a couple years.
Starting right around ovulation last month I had this really horrible right sided pain. I dragged myself in to see someone (at urgent care) for the first time in a long while. They ordered a CT mostly to make sure it wasn't a massive cyst or appendicitis I guess. It came up clear so "no explanation for pain." Over the next week the pain faded but didn't go away completely.
I started my period a week early today and the last couple days the same pain was back so bad I could barely sleep. It must be cycle related. But it is not around my uterus, at all. It's up where my right kidney is, between the bottom of my ribcage and the top of my hip. It hurts where I hurt when I had a kidney infection during pregnancy a long time ago, but just on the one side. I assume if I had kidney stones the CT would have seen it but idk?
I'm contemplating another trip to urgent care if it doesn't go away tonight. I just want to know if anyone else has had something like this, and if so, what it ended up being. And what tests I should ask to do to figure it out.

I'm a PRN DPT in home health (HH). I love the flexibility, autonomy, and not having to be in a building all day. But I must be honest, although I still have a deep passion for helping the elderly, I am over traditional physical therapy. #1 I felt like I was lied to through school. I don't feel like I got the real taste of reality when in clinicals. It one of those things where you know something isn't for you, but shoot I was already 2-2 1/2 years in. I'm tired of getting emails about limited visits regarding insufficient insurance coverage, even when the patient really needs it; having to fight for visits with other disciplines; not truly feeling valued; imposter syndrome occasionally due to admins questioning my decisions on how many visits I plot. Like HONEY I went to school for a purpose! I wouldn't waste visits on those that don't need it as well as jeopardize my license with waste of services! So insulting. To add additional insult to injury, it doesn't help seeing the coordination notes on how much they make off PT with the insurance companies (although I understand they may not receive that full amount, but still).
So, I want to start my own business with Medicare part B and cash based services. I admittedly have been self sabotaging myself by getting comfortable off the money I make with HH and life in general. I do not care for any other setting than HH. Tried them all, HH is better fit despite paperwork. I've been saving, needing to establish LLC, liability on business, logo, all that.. I believe I have reached my last rope with traditional therapy. I want to bring an ADAPTIVE way for the elderly to remain functionally mobile. I've been having this urge to leave for a few months, and based on how my stress has been with HH, it's time for a change.
Does anyone know different occupations that I can look into part time? Even if I needed to take some courses and get certificate for? SOMETHING QUICK! Like 6-12 months or less if courses are needed. I would hope for the salary to continue to be above $70,000 if I could help it (although I make more) but I do understand I may have to bend with salary.
TIA!

tl;dr wife treats me like her servant and not husband
Me (M29) and my wife (F25) have been married for 5 years and have a 15 month old son. We currently live out of state from our family and close friends so we don't have a lot of help with our son. Little background, before our son was born I was having severe mental health issues and was able to get healthy and am on medication and go to therapy. I remember talking to my wife before our son was born and telling her that my fear is that my wife will get 'bored' with having a baby and move on to the next thing that interests her.
My fear has become a reality. My wife is an 'Influencer' she says, but she doesn't make any money and has a small following. ALL of her time is dedicated to this. Now everything is on me to do. I do all the cooking (Breakfast, Lunch, Dinner) most of the cleaning (outside her cleaning videos), am the only income, and am the primary caregiver to our son most days. I work remotely from home, but that ends up with me taking care of the diapers and nap time and comfort.
Last week I hit a breaking point and I told my wife I need a break. She said quote "you get a break twice week on your days off during his nap, what you need more?" I was appalled. This led to a huge argument as I stated that I work 11 hours day, 4 am to 3pm, sleep about 4 hours a night, and just need some time to get some things done. She stated that I need to do more around the house if I wanted a break because "work is your break". The other weekend I asked if I could sleep in a little on Saturday since I wake up so early and she said "well I get up with the baby every day you don't deserve it".
We dont have any intimacy and if we do, she wants it done as fast as possible and makes me not want to do it anymore. I can't talk to her because she breaks down sobbing everytime. I tried to get her to go to therapy with me, but "therapy is for people who are just complaining", even though I am in therapy. I am relapsing mentally over the past few months and we got to a very dangerous point. I told her everything I was feeling and what I wanted to do, and all she did was run away and tell me to get over it.
Is there any hope left? Thank you.

I’m currently not talking to anyone anymore but really one person and like idk I’m just kind of reading it and trying to show that I care but I just don’t even give a single fuck about what they are saying unless I can contribute or ask questions or maybe see something that specifically interests me but idk I just want the conversation to be over and go back to either talking about myself and my mental health or my own little bubble. I haven’t even been diagnosed but am trying to maybe get to one and isolating is a horrible thing probably I need to apologize to all my “friends” that are kind of still friends but my ego is getting in the way. I’m hopefully going to tomorrow morning though. I hate that everything has to be about me though. Or that’s an exaggeration but I don’t know I’m want to cry typing this as the days go on/I find out more about myself and how I’ve been/my brain has operated I just want it to freaking end but I know that’s living in a victim complex. This is hell and a defense mechanism right but if anyone has any suggestions/advice let me know.

My Reddit post wasn’t to hurt you, it was to make sure you knew I was fucking devastated so you didn’t think I didn’t care because your response made me feel like you just turned everything off and that hurt me deeply so I didn’t want you to go through the same thing. In fact, that’s one of the things I sent you that I worried was “cringey” when you had me blocked. I felt like it wasn’t appropriate to reach out to you but I did then regretted it when you didn’t respond. The other thing was just me being a sad sack that I had hoped and believed you would come to me and try to fix things like I had done last year.
When I said you walked away, I meant on the phone during the first call. I asked for a back up plan and you didn’t want to make one after cutting two months off the search time we had and then when I was sitting there telling you how alone I was and how hard it had been, you got off the phone to run errands for the boys and just left me crying all alone.
You told me you didn’t want to “be on a rollercoaster” but it felt like you put me on one with constantly making these big plans then changing them because it got hard for you. When I said it wasn’t healthy for me, I meant that feeling like I wasn’t being treated like a partner and that the longer we were together the less I could rely on you was bad for my mental health. Instead of hearing that as a plea, you heard it as a dig and a hard boundary to go away. I wanted you to come closer to me and reassure me and tell me that things would be okay and we would find a way to make sure my needs were met but instead you turned your back on me.
Every time I gave you an out, you took it. Being vulnerable and sharing struggle is hard. I am afraid of dumping on you and being a burden. You would tell me you wanted to be there for me when everything was fine but when it was hard and I basically asked if you were sure, you essentially said no.
You relied on me to be circumspect and thoughtful and patient and there for you but I think you expected that that was just who I was and didn’t realize what a huge effort that was to be perfect all the time. I desperately wanted to be able to relax and lean on you but you didn’t think I needed it or know how to give it. I just wanted you to tell me to let it out once in a while and listen and hold me tight while I cried and know that it’s just how I process, but I know you would have recoiled and taken it all personally and lost respect for and trust in me. It felt like the one time things calmed down and you had space at the end of last year, my struggles went up and instead of supporting me, you started looking for new big changes for you to fill your bandwidth.

Posted in another sub and it got removed.
My (28m) best friend (28f) has got me at the end of my rope, and I didn’t know what to do but give her an ultimatum.
We live fairly close to each other and are pretty big presences in each other’s lives. The problem recently has been her alcohol consumption, and I feel like it’s ruining our friendship.
Recently, she had a serious mental health issue that needs regular medication and therapy. The initial diagnosis was expensive, and took out most of her savings and she needed to rely on us for support, both financially and emotionally.
She has been told repeatedly that she should not drink with her medication, as it can weaken or counteract the effects. However, she has not stopped, and occasionally my partner and I have had to help her get home or take her to her psychiatrist when her medicine no longer managed her symptoms because of the alcohol.
Making it worse is the financial effects of both the condition and her drinking. She struggles to afford the therapist and medicine. After discussing it with my partner, we decided to support her with the medical bills (I can afford to as I have a well paying job and my parents are quite well off and left me with significant savings). However, even with us supporting her, she often struggles to make ends meet, despite having money for alcohol daily.
Two months ago, my partner and I sat down with her and suggested she may need help with her alcohol consumption. We tried to be as unbiased and open as possible, and after some initial resistance she said she would like support to overcome it. We gave her resources and people to contact to support her, and offered to pay any costs that came up.
We thought it would be a positive step, but over the next few weeks things degraded. She simply tried hiding her drinking from us, didn’t contact any of the resources we gave her, and didn’t tell her therapist either.
The straw that broke the camel’s back came when she forgot her wallet after drinking and couldn’t attend a dance class she wanted to go to. She called me, very clearly drunk, and asked me to come and give her the funds to get to class. I said I couldn’t, because I was about to take a family call, and she told me to go fuck myself and that I was a shitty friend.
i called her the next day and told her I couldn’t handle the emotional and financial stress of supporting her to be treated this way. I said she needed to decide to either make a real effort to kick the alcohol, or I would be cutting her out of my life. She asked if we could discuss it in person, and I agreed.
The in person discussion was me talking to her and three of her friends. The four of them proceeded to call me a massive jerk for multiple reasons. I was not her parents and had no right to control her life. It was cruel of me to threaten her financial security and access to mental health care, especially as it was “not even my money.” I left without raising the issue as it was basically shouted down whenever I tried to raise it.
Following all of that, I got messages and photos from her friends in a nightclub, with my best friend sitting at a table. The accompanying messages said “she’s not drinking, we made sure for you since you’re her mum.” Over the next few days I’ve received similar messages with her at social gatherings from her friends, and it’s really starting to get under my skin.
How do I maintain support or have a constructive conversation to move forward from this? Is this just a sign I should cut things off?
Tldr: I feel like my friend has a problem with alcohol, it’s negatively affecting our relationship. After some rough times I gave her an ultimatum, but it’s just pushed her into getting people to back her up and attack me, without breaking the ultimatum, to get me to see some perspective.

Hello! I am a employee of a non corporate Starbucks that is inside a Target shopping center. So I technically work for target and get Target benefits. However a bunch of things have been happening since I was hired 11 months ago.
So my main team lead for Starbucks (we can call her bossy), doesn’t know how to do her job. That’s right, she has worked at the SAME position for 25+ years and doesn’t know how to do her job (that’s not even the worse part). Just today she clocked out of her shift 20 mins early without telling ANYONE! Then she went to sit with her friends as I am now by myself struggling to make and take orders with a long line with about a 20 min wait time. Bossy and her friends just WATCHED me struggle with the orders. She never told me why she clocked out early even, she was NO WHERE NEAR overtime for the week. Besides that, she left us alone off and on four times for a total of 3ish hours. Didn’t have a reason but “emails”. My other team leads said it only takes 20 mins PER WEEK to work on emails, she takes 2+ hours PER DAY, and she won’t say when she is leaving to do it. If I ask where she was, she just says emails and not to worry.
She also doesn’t give us barista’s free drinks or food, yet claims to her Starbucks bosses that she does. Since I’ve been hired, I’ve never gotten a free drink from her, she is supposed to be doing it more often, but doesn’t. Even worse though, us baristas are NOT allowed to have water on hand. By state law we are supposed to have a designated area for water to go. We do not have one, we brought this up to her and Bossy ignored us. So we are LUCKY if we get to drink ANYTHING between breaks (about 4 hours), and our Target isn’t cooling off fast enough to beat the heat, so it’s humid and hot inside the store. We brought this up to a higher team lead and they also ignored us. Hell, even HR ignored me!
Now the team lead above bossy and is the front of the store team lead who is responsible for scheduling (let’s call him EL for entitled leader), has refused me to be trained in other parts of the store. I’ve been BEGGING for 2 months to be trained in ANY position and no longer work Starbucks, and that I don’t care where and I won’t complain. Plus we are in dire need of staff however the store refuses to hire new people and instead burns out it’s own employees. He moved me to lanes 2 times, other then that I’ve only been in Starbucks. I tried asking again and he ignored me. There is 3 team lead positions opening up within the next 2 weeks and I feel like if I ask they won’t allow me to apply just because. ALSO EL hates giving vacation time or days of, even though your not available that day for whatever reason, he will still put you on the schedule. I requested a weekend off 2 months in advance, and he kept denying it for no reason.
I wish there were other jobs near by that paid as much or better then Target, but none of them come close, and as a person finishing high school, I prefer a higher paying job. However the management at Target, in the part of the store where I work, is so bad I want to quit.
ALSO!!!! Almost all of the baristas are DRAMA! And I’ve been so mistreated over my mental and physical health that I can’t take it. As a person who gets triggered and can easily get panic attacks I did warn them that if I run to the back randomly I just need a min. One time I did that after a miserable week, I ran to the back struggling to breathe. One barista that was about to clock out for lunch turned around, looked at me, and said, “What the f*ck is wrong with you?!” I slowly said panic attack through gasps and shaking and all she said was “Well get back to work then, it’s not that bad.” HUH!? I’m barely able to stand in front of you, wdym?
There is another barista that makes fun of me because I can’t spell names for the life of me. So I often ask customers to spell it for me and I always hear behind me, then spelling it super slow interrupting the customer as they are making drinks.
Now, is this normal and I’m frustrated over nothing, or are my feelings accurate. Cause to me it’s EXTREMELY infuriating.

I feel suffocated. I don't know what it feels like to be truly loved. When I learned about NPD and saw what other parents were like - it was eye-opening and I realized that all my beliefs of my parents behaviors and attitudes being extreme and abnormal were true. I feel betrayed in many ways. I read posts saying that nparent love isn't real love because it's conditional. That makes me wonder what real love really is. I've caught mine lying to my face almost perfectly, saying that they didn't do xyz or spread lies about me to others right after they did exactly that! And they say it with such a straight face too it's almost believable! Followed by complete and utter denial and blaming when caught. Don't even get me started on the insanely fragile ego.
And since they're older, people would rather believe the elderly parents lies than the sane offspring. All the times they were nice to me - was it all fake? Was it just because they wanted something in return? Like the security of having their own adult adult who would take care of them, nod silently when they complained, serve as a punching bag, sacrifice everything in life for them, and put my own happiness on the back burner? Was even a little bit of the niceness they showed real??? All these years was it ALL just an act? It makes me wonder if there's a spectrum to NPD - like some parents having more severe NPD than others and maybe those with slightly less extreme NPD are capable of showing little bits of true love to their kids? Maybe I'm just being hopeful...and my parents likely have it really bad.
I feel so lost and helpless - people tell me I'm "too kind" and I don't know how to be selfish (even in a good way by taking care of my own needs). I know if I abandon my nparent, word will spread like wildfire and confirm all the lies this narc made up about me being "selfish, spoiled, argumentative, etc" and God knows what else. If anything, I've been the opposite - quiet, obedient, the type who wouldn't even complain while sleeping on the floor for years and living penny-to-penny, the type who'd take a bullet for others without saying a word...I'm not perfect but I've always been compassionate and understanding even to my parents. But I just want to be free and not have to worry about all of this anymore. I want to finally live my life and it's long overdue. Part of me doesn't even know where to start mentally speaking.
It's like growing up in a cage and then finally when you break free, your mind is still imprisoned. Even if I'm physically removed from the environment, I can't find the stamina nor the method to break free from this mental cage I'm in to achieve the goals I've always dreamed of partly because I'm so burnt out. I feel very sad. It's not just the rumors spread to people that I'm worried about, nor the unnecessary drama that may be created and dumped on me while I'm dealing with my own struggles, it's also the fact that I can't bring myself to fully break contact. My parent is very old and needs someone to be the caregiver and do everything. But we don't have the money to hire a caregiver, even if we pay for the caregiver to come for a few hours per week, most want full-time work, which we can't afford to pay them; and my parent is picky about who to let into the place. Parent doesn't have any real close friends or family who'd help either and a nursing facility is not an option for us. Any advice on this would help.
And how does one go "low contact"? When I've tried in the past, low contact always ends up being "high contact" with the parent causing a fuss or constantly demanding me to do several tasks, terrible name calling, or making the situation seems so incredibly dire by calling multiple times or reaching out to others who try to contact me - it seems like the parent is going through something so extreme, but when I reach out again it's nothing. Just attention-seeking behavior and wanting to ruin my days. If I went no contact - that would be explosive. If I go low contact like before, it's a repeat of the cycle. I really don't know what to do. I already have a very stressful life outside of my parent, I don't want to make it worse. But I know if I continue like this, I'm just going to break in this cage I'm in. I would really appreciate any kind advice.
Also, I'd really like someone who's gone through having parents with NPD to talk to. It feels lonely sometimes when people don't understand the gravity of what I've gone through and just can't empathize. Have any of you found support groups that you recommend?

I've burnt myself out this semester carrying multiple assignments for lazy group members, sacrificing work, relationships and most importantly my mental health so I can learn things and achieve my goals in this course.
I don't care that my team members who contributed nothing are going to get marked down, it doesn't affect me, but at the very least I think those marks should flow to me for all the extra effort.
How is this not unreasonable?