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Victor sat at his kitchen table and stared at the tablet in his hand as he blew on his morning coffee. It had been a busy week, setting up areas for construction with enough room for the nano-forge, then using it to build auto-factories to build more mining drones and more forge spiders to gather more resources and clear out more areas.
Thus far he had Ingot Storage 1 complete and the forge spiders pathed to bring back and sort them. Then Hydroponics 1 was complete, the auto-farmers were programmed and with any luck in about six weeks he’d have wheat, oats, barley, corn, beans, rice, cabbage, potatoes, tomatoes, okra, mushrooms, squash, and many more fruits and vegetables.
Today he was working on Meat Lab 1. Set up was pretty straight forward, the equipment and power were in place, and the specimens were brought from dimensional storage to the grow labs, it was just the pathing necessary to cultivate, harvest and can the meats. His budget was limited here, he had chicken, beef, and pork cultures, and that was it.
Who would have thought his life savings, his parents life savings, and the sale of his ancestral home still couldn’t get him everything he wanted to start a new life on a colony world? He tapped his tablet a few more times before he was satisfied with the pathing, he pretty much copied it over from Hydro 1, they both canned the food in the end anyways.
He then checked on his mining drones, they were busy little beavers, and had found a remarkable amount of usable materials. More than even the satellite estimated for this location, he sent a few of them two days ago to cut a shaft down to the petroleum reserves, it appears that they had indeed succeeded in locating it.
He brought up the auto-factories that he had built from the nano-forge, numbers three and seven were idle, so he started constructing hauler drones to pump the raw petroleum into their internal tanks and then bring them up to Storage 1, where they can unload into new tanks. This will solve my plastics issue… I hope.
Yup, everything was going smoothly. Even if he never made it back to the empire, at least here he could have a little piece of it, with all the modern conveniences he was used to. “Screw living in places like Wuzhen. They didn’t even have indoor plumbing!” He muttered as his attention was brought to a notification on his tablet. INTRUDER ALERT. ____________ Pan ran as though her life depended on it. Well, actually it did, for the instinctive Ox-Kin that were chasing her would kill and eat her if she were caught. Being Rabbit-Kin her small and agile frame allowed her speed and maneuverability, but the Ox-Kin instinctuals didn’t have to run around trees, they could just push them aside!
Her wagon and all her goods were lost, she was dirty and scared. There was a clearing up ahead and her heart dropped, nowhere to hide, and the stream would slow her down, she was trapped now! She frantically looked from left to right as she continued to run, looking for some way out as the Ox-Kin roared behind her tearing up the ground as their razor sharp hoofs slammed into the ground.
She heard a sound as if there were thunderstorm raging, but it did not end, it simply got louder. She looked up in time to see a black figure on wings of fire plunge towards the ground. She didn’t stop, if it would distract the instinctuals then she would use it to her advantage and hopefully escape this terrible fate.
Suddenly she heard a sound as if someone were rubbing the rim of a meditation bowl, only hundreds of times louder, then screams of pain, several thuds, and then silence. She turned her head to see the black figure stand upright and to her astonishment, all the Ox-Kin were down.
No, not down, dead. Cut in half, obviously in mid gallop for the halves of their bodies were separated by meters. She slowed to take in the strange figure, its helmet magically disappeared behind him, showing a foreign face with short cropped black hair and eyes she had only seen on portraits of the Eternal Empress. _____________ “It’s ok, they’re all dead now. Waste of good beef if you ask me, but it’s a little too close to cannibalism for me. Had enough corpo-starch in the guard to last me a lifetime.” He said as she stopped to take a breath. He slowly started walking over to her.
Pan backed up, rather involuntarily, as this man had just slaughtered half a dozen instinctual Ox-Kin in the blink of an eye.
“Whoa, calm down, not gonna hurt you. Just want to ask you a few questions, I’m Victor by the way, what’s your name?” He asked, hands out to show he meant no harm.
Pan finally caught enough wind to take her hands off her thighs and straighten up, one of her bunny ears fell across her face, a sign of how exhausted she truly was. “I’m… Pan… Sorry, still trying to catch my breath.”
The strange man cocked his head to the side and she noticed it wasn’t just a helm he had been wearing, At first she thought he was wearing all black clothing, but it was actually armor, very intricate armor. “Are you a cultivator? I’ve never seen a male cultivator before.”
Victor chuckled, “I’ve been getting that a lot lately. The answer is… complicated. Now, about those questions. Shall we walk back to your home while I ask?”
Pan shook her head, “The only home I had was my wagon. I was a trader who bought and sold goods. The instinctuals destroyed it while I was gathering water. I heard my Ox bellow and when I came up from the stream it was being eaten, the wagon destroyed, my wares nothing more than shredded trash.” She looked down and started to cry as the realization that she had just lost everything took hold.
Victor put on his officers face, oh boy. Here come the water works. “Shh, calm down, it’s only a wagon. It’s a thing, and things can be replaced.”
She looked up to him and lowered her hands, “Perhaps to a powerful cultivator, but I am but a lowly peasant girl. I will have to sell my self on the streets to eat now!” She buried her face back into her hands and wailed.
“Oh for Emperors sakes!” Victor thought as he scooped the small woman up in his arms. This prompted a sharp “Eeek!” From her as he activated his jump jets. _____________ Pan was terrified. Rabbit-Kin were not made for flying. The strange cultivator had scooped her up in his arms as though she were a small child and launched them into the air. She tried to scream, but the air screeching by her face seemed to carry the noise away. Though she doubted anyone could have heard over fire erupting from his wings.
Suddenly they landed and she was set down. She looked around and saw they were on a ledge, far up the mountain where the Ox-Kin had chased her. The ledge had a metal rail all the way around it but she saw no way to reach it other than flight.
The strange man must have brought his helmet back up before they launched into the air, because he had it up now. He turned to the mountain and it split open before him! After retracting his helm he simply said, “Follow me, since you don’t have a home, I’ll bring you to mine.”
She followed him into the mountain, expecting it to be dark and cold, but to her surprise it was warm and light shown down from the ceiling as if it were daylight! The walls were smooth stone, and after a few meters in the mountain closed behind them, only it seemed to do it twice, once inside and once outside.
She continued to walk until they came to a strange door with a wheel in the center. The cultivator spun the wheel and opened the metal door. She had never seen so much worked metal in all her days. Even the blacksmith shops lacked the amount, or skill she saw here.
After she entered into a small chamber, Victor closed the door behind them and walked to a strange outcropping on the wall and turned around. The armor up close was neither new nor perfect, she saw dints and dings, and scorch marks in places. Then she jumped back as it split in half and Victor stepped out in nothing more than short pants covering his man-hood.
She blushed and diverted her eyes, but not before noticing the rippling muscles, scar tissue, and little round metal discs at regular intervals all over his body. He covered himself with a very plush white robe and slippers before opening another door that was identical to the first. “Should I wear slippers as well, Master Cultivator?”
Victor looked back, “That won’t be necessary, the cleaning drones will handle any mess we cause.” Pan pondered on what a drone was. A servant perhaps? Was that why he brought me here, to be one of his servants? Or was it something else? Oh no, she mentioned having to sell herself, did he expect her to be one of his mistresses? She wouldn’t be opposed, for he was a handsome man, but what kin was he?
She almost missed what was said next. “This is my humble abode, you’re welcome to stay here for a time while I get my bearings on this land.” Victor said as he walked over to the table and picked up a piece of see-through glass. Magical runes and pictures flared into existence as he tapped at it before setting it back down.
Pan could barely speak. This place was what she would expect in the Imperial palace. There was no kang, or open fire, but it was the perfect temperature and humidity. She saw a large couch, tables, chairs, cabinets of wood, a countertop with a strange steel bowl and what looked as if it were a well pump above it.
The back wall had multiple doors, the two that were open showed one to be a bed room, with a huge bed, the other was tiled with a white chair, it almost looked like a throne? How strange she thought as she peered into the room to see a chamber of fogged glass also inside the room.
Victor noticed her curiosity, “That is the bathroom. Come here, I’ll show you.”
Pan followed Victor into the bathroom as he demonstrated the toilet, explaining rather embarrassingly how it worked and how to use it, he then showed her the glass chamber with the odd steel handles.
“This one is hot, and this one is cold, you turn them both on until you get the temperature just right to clean yourself. On the wall there is liquid soap, shampoo, and conditioner, though I keep my hair close, so the conditioner wouldn’t be as necessary as say someone with your long hair.” He explained.
Pan was shocked as the saw the stream of water pouring from the wall. What manner of magic was this? “I have never seen a male cultivator, but it is known they are master craftsmen, can you all create such magical wonders?”
Victor shrugged, “No idea, I’ve never met another, uh, male cultivator.”
Pan considered, “Could I, maybe use this chamber to clean up? This mornings activities have left me a little soiled.”
Victor nodded, “Of course.” He reached into a small cabinet and produced a large piece of fluffy cloth and placed it on another steel rail outside the chamber. Before placing a smaller version of it inside the chamber on a rack. Finally he reached back into the cabinet and produced a robe much like he was wearing and placed it on a hook behind the door.
He then pointed to the small one inside the chamber, “That is a wash cloth to clean yourself with the soap, use the shampoo here on your hair, and then after rinsing it out, rub the conditioner in and let it sit a bit before finally rinsing it out. Then dry yourself off with this towel, and put on the robe I placed on the door.”
Pan nodded, “What will you do with my clothes after I remove them?”
Victor sniffed “Probably burn them.” He thought to himself. “I will provide you with clothes to lounge around the house.” He turned around and closed the door behind him.
Pan used the ‘toilet’ surprised at its efficiency to clean itself with water before turning on the water stream and adjusting the knobs until it was pleasant. She took to cleaning herself with gusto, for she had never had such luxury. Even the tubs at the inns she could sometimes visit were not this nice.
She heard the door open, and through the smoked glass she could see that Victor seemed to be gathering her things from the floor and leaving behind something on the ‘toilet’. After getting herself more clean that she thought she ever had in her entire life she sighed and decided she needed to get out.
After fiddling with the knobs and nearly freezing herself before turning them the proper way she reached out and grabbed the ‘towel’ and found it did an amazing job of drying her. Afterwards she tied the cloth up in her hair, careful not to get her ears and examined the clothes he brought her.
There was an article of clothing like what he wore, the short pants, but smaller, and tighter. She assumed it was for the same purpose and put it on, then she found a soft pair of pants, like men would wear, but of much finer and softer material. Finally, there was a form fitting shirt that she found left little to the imagination, but she had little choice to but to put it on. Finally there were thick, luxurious slippers on the floor and the robe on the back of the door.
She came out of the bathroom to find him at the strange counter, cooking. “A man who cooks for a woman? I know he is a foreigner, but I have never heard of this happening.” She thought as he waved her to the large table.
“I missed breakfast this morning, your little tussle with the Ox-Kin ladies kind of put it on hold, have you eaten?” He asked.
Pan felt the hunger pains when he asked as she shook her head.
He chuckled as he continued his work, “No, I guess you didn’t get a chance to eat this morning either.
How do you like your eggs?”
Pan was confused, “Um, I prefer them cooked?”
Victor looked back before saying, “Scrambled it is then.”
After a few minutes and some toiling around the cupboards he dropped off a huge plate in front of her. “Normally I’d let the auto-cook prepare the food, but since I’m getting everything up and running at the moment it’s missing a lot of ingredients. So, I worked with what I had, scrambled eggs, bacon, grits, and toast.”
She stared down at her plate, it mostly looked familiar, but the white porridge was a bit different. He handed her strange utensils before pushing two strange bottles with seasonings in them with holes punched in the top. She watched as he used the utensils to eat, and attempted to do the same.
The spoon was easy, she had used those for soup, but the tiny pitch fork and knife were difficult. Victor noticed this and stood up, went to a cabinet and pulled out a drawer and brought back metal chop sticks.
Pan stared at them, they were perhaps brass, possibly even gold, her mouth dropped, these utensils would have been worth more than her wagon! Victor looked up from his food, “Is everything ok? Is there something wrong with the chopsticks?”
Pan hurriedly put the chopsticks to work grabbing up the slivers of pork. “No, no. This lowly peasant girl was merely in amazement at the quality of the utensils.”
Victor nodded as he watched her eyes go round with amazement after chewing on the bacon. Before she dug into the eggs and tried the grits, deciding they needed the seasonings, which she found was salt and a form of pepper, she nodded before cleaning her plate.
Victor sat back, his own plate clean, “Now that’s a healthy appetite, I wasn’t sure a girl your size could finish a plate like that.”
Pan flushed, a bit embarrassed, “It was no doubt due to your cooking expertise. But I still don’t know why you brought me here.”
Victor stood and took her plate and utensils and opened a strange metal door under the counter and placed them into a metal chamber before closing it back. “You said you were a traveling merchant, which means you go places and hear things. I’m new here and have questions. Therefore we can help each other.”
He ushered Pan to the plush couch and sat down, she took the time to pull her hair out of the towel and he took it from her and went into the ‘bathroom’ a strange name as there was no bathtub inside it and returned to sit at the opposite side of the couch.
Pan let him sit before asking, “Ok, you have questions, what do you want to know?”
Victor took a moment to gather his thoughts before speaking, “Why do you have rabbit ears? Why do people in the villages have monkey tails or goats eyes? And what the hell is up with these instinctuals that are more animal that people?” _______________ It had been hours and Pan was actually feeling mentally drained. The man before her was not a cultivator. Whatever he was, she doubted many cultivators except the Empress could hope to match him. The more he showed her, the more she was certain his powers were unlimited. She didn’t know whether to bow in awe, or run in terror.
Not from this plane of existence is how he put it. Meaning from the realm of the divinities maybe? She did not know for sure.
“So, this Eternal Empress came along a few thousand years ago, united the lands, built a wall and a government, and now uses her armies and cultivator sects to maintain law and order across her lands?” He asked.
Pan nodded, “Yes, before her we were broken into tribes that warred against one another constantly.”
Victor paced in front of her, “So she is immortal, like me. That’s good and bad, good in that she may have the knowledge to get me home. Bad, that she could see me as a threat and has tons of resources.” He suddenly stopped pacing. “I’m hungry, are you hungry?”
Pan was not going to say no to a free meal, as she literally had nothing to her name now. Not even her clothes. “I could eat master… er Victor.”
He started off to the ‘kitchen’ and opened the top to the large metal door and produced a round item wrapped in flexible glass? Or was it cloth that looked like glass? “Victor is fine, I’m going to make a Pizza, I doubt you’ve ever had one, but trust me, they’re great.”
As he worked they continued the questions, “So cultivators are broken up into sects, each one with its own goals and agendas, but all loyal to the Empress?”
Pan nodded, “Yes, and then the Iron Legions are armored mortals who keep the peace throughout the empire, although none of the towns around here are large enough to boast a garrison.”
The metal and glass hinged door was opened and the round cake like object that was placed on a pan was put into it and the door closed. “Ok, twenty minutes and we eat. So tell me, what kin is the Empress?”
Pan looked confused, “The Empress is the Empress, she has no kin.”
Victor wiped his hands on a small dish towel, “So you are rabbit-kin, I’ve met tiger-kin and boar-kin, and others, but she has no kin?”
Pan made a sudden connection, “No, she is like you. She has no kin.”
Victor dropped the dish towel on the counter, “So she’s human.” ________________ “Curse that damnable Victor Cane!” Mei swore as she and Xiang pushed the wagon to free it from the mud once more as the Ox pulling it simply lacked the strength to free it.
Xiang looked to her sect sister, “My my, Mei.” She chuckled at her own word play. “If I didn’t know better I’d say you were getting fixated on the male.”
Mei stared daggers at her companion, she knew she could feel the killing intent, but as they were both second tier, it did little. “The male was aloof, arrogant, cared nothing for face, and ignored me on the battlefield!”
Xiang grinned even more as she climbed aboard the wagon and took the reins. “Don’t think the rest of your sisters haven’t noticed the way you talk about him, you cover your interest with complaint, but it is a thin sheet.”
Mei reached down to her left hand, “He put his hand on mine in the Inn before he flew away on wings of fire. He was trying to comfort me on the loss of our sisters.”
Xiang turned her head sharply, “You didn’t put that in your report, this is the first any of us have heard of it.”
Mei sighed, “I don’t know what to think of it. Male cultivators are so rare, just seeing one outside of the the sect inner circles is a rarity. Most of us never get to even speak to a male cultivator unless we ascend to a high tier within the sect, making us worthy of being in their presence. I wanted to cherish it.”
Xiang smiled as she looked back to the ox before snapping the reins, “I would cherish it too, this is a hard life, mortal men would break in our embrace, but a cultivator male would not. He was a good looking man for a foreigner too.”
Mei shuddered, “That he is, even if a bit rugged, he is evidently a soldier after all.”
Xiangs mischievous grin was back, “I knew it, you were pining over this Victor!”
Mei’s killing intent was definitely felt by Xiang this time as she laughed uproariously at her friends discomfort.
“Fear not my OLDER sister, for in one passing of the moon we will be in the Celestial City and you can deliver your prize to the Empress. I am sure after this you will get to see your handsome soldier again. That is, if the Empress doesn’t take him as her own.” Xiang sang the last part with glee.
Mei stopped glaring, “You don’t think she would do that do you?” She asked.
Xiang laughed so hard she almost fell off the wagon.

My husband, myself and our 3 kids currently live with (co-own the house) my SIL, her husband, her child and their 3 dogs. It's a 9 bedroom farm house on 18 acres that my husband and SIL inherited years ago. The bills are split as followed: SIL and her husband cover land tax, all streaming services, home insurance and internet ($1400 a month). My husband and I cover water, electric, heat and all food ($1300-$1600 a month). It's usually split pretty evenly. The small chores are split between the kids. The big chores generally fall off on me and me only- as my SIL, her husband and my husband all work 12 hour overnight shifts (they wake up at 4pm, leave for work by 7pm, get home at 6am to sleep), whereas I own and operate my own business from the house that requires very minimal working (though I wouldn't consider it a job because I absolutely fucking love it and it doesn't feel like work). I also take care of their kid and dogs during the day. The arrangement has ALWAYS been that my SIL cooks every meal. Her idea, because her husband won't touch anything unless she cooks it. So I cover all food cost and cover all household chores/her dog and kid maintenance, she cooks all the meals.
Lately she has been complaining every single night about having to cook. For the past 2 weeks alone she has been ordering take out pizza or insisting we have a "fend for yourself" night. On the nights she buys pizza, we all eat together, but on the "fend for yourself" nights, I ONLY cook for my husband and kids (and I usually fed their kid too, I have no problem with that). My husband would cook if I asked but usually he is busy with home or vehicle maintenance or playing with the kids, since he hardly has any time with them. SIL is now complaining about me not cooking for them as well. Saying "you couldn't just cook extra portions?" Or something along those lines. I told her no. I absolutely will not cook for them. As it is, I carry damn near every load in this house so no, I'm not cooking giant meals as well. I mean, I take care of their kid, their dogs, all chores, my own kids, cover all food cost and I work for my business on top of it and all they do is sleep and work. She said she is experiencing burnout and I have no doubt that she's telling the truth. However, I still told her it wasn't my job to prevent that from happening either and I'm not willing to do more just because she's burnt out. My husband and even my BIL are on my side (BIL only because he won't touch food that his wife hasn't prepared) but my SIL is pissed, saying it's a dick move for me to not want to cook for everyone.

Hey, folks! Chapter 6 is here! Sorry for such a long wait—I decided to go ahead and give myself some extra time to write and edit (and deal with irl shenanigans). This is my longest chapter yet—nearly 4.4k words! o_O
Anyway, thanks to u/CruisingNW for the title, and of course, thank you u/SpacePaladin15 for this wonderful universe! Well, without further adieu, let's get into it!
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Memory Transcription Subject: Meyra Yeirel, Spacecraft Engineer Apprentice
Location: Veyr, Veyrian Homeworld. Outer Orion Spur.
Date: September 11, 2182.
I pushed myself away from the table, staring at the unconscious Veyrian. In my hysteria, I hadn’t been able to process much aside from what she had said. But her golden eyes… there had been something wrong with them, but I hadn’t caught precisely what it was. I glanced around at the trio. I wasn’t an expert at reading predators’ expressions, but they were undeniably shocked. Galya as well. She sat frozen in her seat, her blue eyes staring into space. I couldn’t fathom why they were so shocked. Was it what I had told them? They should’ve known everything already. Did the Veyrian say something particularly important? If so, why was it so important?
The predators snapping into action derailed my train of thought, causing me to flinch. My heart seized up as I saw they were going for the Veyrian.
Oh, Myern, they’ve snapped, haven’t they? I thought frantically as they crouched next to the Veyrian. I closed my eyes and grimaced, preparing to hear the horrid sound of flesh ripping and the pain-filled screams of the Veyrian.
. . .
. . .
I opened my eyes. To my surprise, the predators had flipped over the Veyrian and were apparently checking if she was alive. I put my paw on my chest, trying to calm my breathing. At every turn, these predators subverted my expectations. Not killing me on sight—both last night and today, not killing me in my sleep, preventing the house from burning down, and remaining calm despite me apparently rocking their entire worldview. Next thing I knew the gray would tell me that it was a herbivore.
“Connor,” the gray growled, “help me out here.”
The ape moved to the other side of the Veyrian and helped the gray. They hauled the Veyrian to her feet and dragged her to the couch. I tried to catch a glimpse of her face, but I couldn’t see anything since her head hung low. They laid her on the couch. The gray tucked a pillow under her neck.
“Go get some water,” the gray commanded, swatting the primate’s arm. It obeyed, hurrying away to the kitchen. “Hey, Galya.” It snapped its claws. Galya flinched and looked at the gray. “Get some pillows.”
Galya put a paw to her head. “Y-yeah. Alright, then.” She stood and got the gray the pillows it wanted. She sat down as the gray tucked the pillows underneath the Veyrian’s legs.
“Thanks, by the way,” the gray added, glancing at Galya.
“You’re w-welcome.” The Venlil stared into space, obviously perturbed by something.
I couldn't believe the brainwashing on Venlil Prime was so overbearing that the Venlil were completely unaware of the galaxy around them. Same for the Terrans and the Arxur. I shuddered to imagine what sort of techniques their governments used to subjugate their populace.
The ape returned with a glass of water and handed it to the gray. The gray took it and stared down at the Veyrian, apparently watching for something. From my place at the table, I couldn’t the Veyrian’s face. The gray didn’t seem to be particularly disturbed by anything, so maybe I had just been imagining things. But… my mind still couldn’t shake the feeling that something was wrong.
I shook my head and gathered my nerves. “H-how did you learn to do all that?” I shuddered as the gray laid its eyes on me.
“My mom was a nurse,” it growled. “She taught me how to handle this sort of situation. In case of emergencies, you know?”
The ape made a strange, sharp chuffing as if something was caught in its throat. I stared at the ape, trying to guess what that sound meant. It was baring its teeth—was it angry? Did the gray say something wrong?
“Looks like it paid off, eh?” The primate swatted the gray’s shoulder. “You always complained about your mom lecturing you on how to perform CPR or how to do the Heimlich m—”
The Veyrian bolted upright, gasping for air. Everyone in the room flinched in unison. The gray acted immediately and handed the Veyrian the glass of water. She took it and began drinking with reckless abandon, spilling the majority of the water on herself. She breathed deeply and put her arm over her eyes. The ape sped away to the kitchen once more.
The thought of a gray possessing medical knowledge shocked me. They only knew how to maim, maul, and murder. They weeded out the weak, making no allowances for undesirables. No amount of UN and Dominion propaganda could change the fact that the gray were bloodthirsty monsters. And yet… here one was in my home. No one was dead. The walls weren’t painted red and orange with the blood of Veyrian and Venlil alike.
The primate returned once again and sat in front of the Veyrian. It gave the glass to her and leaned forward, steepling its long, gangly fingers in front of its face. It looked like it was struggling for words as the Veyrian drank—much slower this time. As the Veyrian finished, the ape lowered its paws.
“So, uh, how are you doing?”
Despite not understanding primate body language, I could tell it had just died inside.
“I mean uh… damnit.” The ape’s head hung low.
The Veyrian removed her arm from her face. “I have not… have not been d-doing well.” Her voice was raspy as if she hadn’t used it in a very long time.
“You uh, you don’t look the best either,” the ape commented. It gestured toward the Veyrian as a whole.
It was right. The Veyrian’s fur in the morning light looked even worse than it had the night before. The Veyrian coughed and turned her head to look around the room. That’s when I realized. I stared at her head, expecting to see her eye appear on the side of her head, yet it never came.
Not until she had turned to look
right
at
me.
I felt a bolt of terror through my chest. I staggered backward, knocking my chair down. A scream built in my throat as I stumbled and fell against the wall. They all stared at me, a mixture of shock and confusion scrawled across their faces.
But they were all a blur. Those two golden eyes stared right into my soul, delving into my psyche and shattering it.
I sunk to the floor, tucking my head between my legs. I hyperventilated, my heart racing. All outside sounds were faint. I barely registered them. Calm down, Meyra, it’s ok. You’re ok. I thought frantically. No, you’re not ok. You have several predators in your home, and she has something extremely wrong with her. They must’ve been torturing her. Changing her DNA. I should’ve snuck out in the middle of the night and run down to the exterminator’s office. Oh, Myern, I’m next aren’t I? I started rocking, unable to control myself. You’re fine, it’s fine, I’m fine. It’s all just a dream. It’s all just a dream. It’s all just a dream it’s all just a dream it’s all just a dreamit’salljustadre—
I flinched as a paw touched my shoulder. I looked up, shaking.
“H-hey, ma’am, are you alright?” Galya asked gently. “What’s wrong?”
I pointed at the twisted Veyrian and curled back into a ball. “Her—her eyes. Wh-what did you d-do to her?”
Galya’s ears drooped in confusion. “Her eyes? What’s wrong with—” she glanced at the Veyrian and back at me. She took a step backward, her eyes widening. “W-wait, what’s wrong with your eyes?”
“Galya, can’t you see that she’s pani—wait, what?” The primate growled inquisitively.
I took a glance around the room. Fear had dawned on their faces. They stood in a semi-circle, stuck in a state of tension. I couldn’t understand why.
But those eyes.
Those two golden eyes.
They stared at me, echoing the horrors of the cruelty of the UN and the Dominion. Myern knows how they had done it. And I was sure I was about to find out. To my horror, she stood slowly, baring her teeth as she went.
Oh, Myern, I thought helplessly. They’ve brainwashed her, too.
“I apologize for thy situation,” she rasped. The trio snapped to look at her, causing me to flinch. “I know… I know this must be quite a shock. To all of thee.”
I breathed shallowly, listening as she spoke. She had a strange accent, alongside her deeper, raspier voice. I had never heard her accent before. Despite my sheer terror, I was intrigued.
“I am Xertalis, goddess of time and space,” she proclaimed. “The former goddess, I should say.” Her head hung low as she stared at the ground.
The trio glanced at each other. The ape closed its eyes and waved its paws around. “Woah, woah woah—hold on. Let’s take this one step at a time. First off, what the ffffffuck? You’re saying all that back in the library really… really happened?”
Xertalis’ silence was enough of an answer for the primate.
“And so… and so all the stuff on TV is real?” It glanced at me. “And that I’m not imagining things?”
“You sure as hell aren’t imagining things,” the gray growled. “I’m seeing this shit.”
Their lack of disturbance surrounding Xertalis and her eye placement was almost more terrifying than the situation I was in. I mustered the courage to speak, despite the voices in my head screaming for me to shut up. “Wh-what the farrik is wrong with you?!” My voice faltered as three pairs of binocular eyes stared at me. “Why are you s-so concerned about my eyes? What about hers?” I waved an indignant paw at Xertalis.
“There’s nothing wrong with her eyes!” The gray roared, causing me to flinch. It put its claws on its head and paced back and forth. “This is fucking insane! What the fuck happened last night? Did our drinks get spiked? No, we didn’t bring drinks. Was it the snacks?” It sat down heavily on the couch, holding its head in its claws. Its knee bounced erratically as it sat.
Nothing the gray had said made sense to me. What drinks? What snacks? Did Galya feed them in the middle of the night?
Galya put her paws in front of her in a placating gesture. “Guys, let’s—let’s just eat some food, and then talk about this. I get that this is pretty insane, b-but yelling isn’t gonna get anything done.” Galya glanced at me. “Besides, I’m sure we’re all starving. Right?”
“Y-yeah,” the ape said. “Let’s do that. Maybe a hot bowl of oimal will help clear our minds.”
Galya put her paw on the gray’s shoulder. It looked up at her, its eyes glossy. “I’m sorry to interrupt you, Kiile. You’re the only one who knows how to cook, and well, you saw how well it went when Connor tried.” She bared her teeth. “How about it?”
The gray took a shuddering breath and bobbed its head. “A-alright. Okay.” It stood and closed its eyes for a moment, breathing deeply. “Let’s g-get this.” And with that, it headed towards the kitchen. As it left, it wiped its eyes.
I stared at Galya, completely floored. A gray. Crying. No, grays can’t cry. They don’t have emotions. They have two modes. Murder, and Stalking. They don’t feel panic or sadness or fear, I thought. But a small, creeping voice asked, Then what was that? I shook my head, trying to shake it off. That was fake. Manufactured. The apes must’ve been teaching the gray how to fake emotions. And yet, the voice persisted.
Galya didn’t notice me staring and instead walked up to Xertalis. Her snout scrunched up as she approached the filthy Veyrian, yet still attempted to speak to her.
“We uh, you should probably get showered,” Galya said. She stood as if she were uncomfortable.
Xertalis didn’t pick up on her discomfort. She flicked her ear inquisitively. “I know not what a… shower is. But I shall dine, for I am quite starved. My long slumber has taken all my energy.” As if to accentuate her plight, Xertalis swayed on her feet.
“Okay, then,” Galya muttered. “Um, well, let’s get you some clothes? Or a blanket at least?”
Xertalis tilted her head at Galya. “What are clothes?” She echoed my thoughts exactly.
“You know what? It’s fine. I’ll just go get a blanket.” Galya grabbed the primate’s paw. “Connor, c’mon.”
Xertalis sat down and watched as the two sped down the hallway. She looked around the room, her ear flicking as she laid her eyes on something new. She seemed particularly interested in the analog clock hanging on the wall. It wasn’t anything special. The numbers and the claws glowed faintly. The [seconds] claw ticked constantly. I swore I could almost hear it over the sound of the gray cooking in the kitchen.
The gray cooking in the kitchen, I thought, amused. I chuckled. The gray cooking in the kitchen. I let out a short laugh. The gray cooking in the kitchen! I started laughing uncontrollably. The absurdity of the whole situation finally got to me. I rocked back and forth, gesturing helplessly with my paws. At some point, my laughter turned to sobs. I put my head in my paws and cried, my tears running down my snout. The gray cooking in the kitchen. Oh, Myern, what am I going to do?
I looked up, and Xertalis was staring at me, perplexed. “What is thy sorrow? Why dost thou act in such a way?”
I gestured vaguely at everything in the room. “Wh-what can I say? I… I’m fucked! I have two p-predators—three predators—in m-my home, and I sure as Xyek c-can’t call the exterminators, otherwise I’ll b-be accused of harboring pr-predators!” I splayed my paws in front of me helplessly. “H-how in the ever living fuck did they g-get here?! The closest UN planet is-is-is—” I gesticulated wildly “—I d-don’t even know how far. Did they u-use FTL? But how did they g-get planetside?” I put my paws on my face and screamed. The sound came out muffled.
I looked up at Xertalis. I could barely hold her gaze, yet her eyes held undeniable sorrow and guilt… and an odd hint of fear. “I will explain,” she said quietly. “Everything. Just… wait.”
I put my paws on my chest and breathed deeply. I tried to calm my mind, yet it was near impossible. All these thoughts bouncing around in my brain like stray bullets. The voices telling me to run away screaming, and the voices telling me to stay and learn. Should I stay or should I go? Should I stay or should I go? Back and forth, back and forth! I wish I could make it stop. I wish I could just wake up, and wake up to a nice, hot bowl of oimal. I wish I wasn’t alone. I wish they were still here.
My thoughts were interrupted by Galya and the ape returning. The primate was carrying a blanket—one of the blankets from the guest room. It approached Xertalis and held it out.
“Sorry we took so long,” Galya apologized. “We sorta had to dig around for it, and we didn’t figure she’d like us going into her room.”
I cringed internally as Xertalis took the blanket and wrapped it around herself. That’s not going to wash out very well, is it?
“Thou are fine,” Xertalis said, taking the blanket. “I thank thou, for it is quite cold in here.”
The gray came around the countertop with a steaming pot in its claws. “You guys came back right in time,” it growled. It placed a pad on the table and set the pot on top of it. “I found some [brown sugar], thankfully, so it’s not gonna be too bland.” It hurried into the kitchen and returned with a bowl. “There were also some [apples], but there wasn’t any milk, so we’ll just have to do with water.”
The ape stopped Galya in her tracks. “You go and sit down, alright? I’ll help get the bowls and stuff.”
Galya stared at the primate for a moment. “Are you sure? This whole thing has been pretty stressful for you, I imagine.”
The ape made the same, strange chuffing noise. Except it somehow sounded… sadder? I tilted my head. “I’m fine. Just almost became a human flambe last night. At least the mattress downstairs was comfortable.” The primate glanced at me before moving into the kitchen.
Galya took a seat at the table. Xertalis sat across from her. “So you weren’t uncomfortable?” Galya asked.
I pushed myself up and leaned so I could see into the kitchen.
The primate shrugged and glanced at the gray. “Well, as comfortable as I could be while sharing a mattress with Godzilla over here.”
“Ha!” The gray barked, causing me to flinch. “That’s rich, coming from King Kong, Lord of Mattresses.”
My gaze bounced between the two nervously. Their words didn’t seem friendly. But… their tones. I didn’t know ape or gray social cues, but they almost sounded friendly. Yet another piece of a constantly shifting puzzle. Their moods seemed to have gotten better while I was having my breakdown, which struck me as oddly ironic. Slowly, I moved to the table and took a seat at the far end. The primate and the gray returned with bowls, spoons, and cups full of water, which were being transported on a tray.
I watched in surprise at how deftly the gray moved the cups to the table. I had only ever known gray to be clumsy and brutish. But there was almost an artistry to its movements.
“How did you do that?” I blurted. I cringed as everyone turned to look at me.
“Put the cups on the table?” It shrugged its shoulders. “I don’t know. Practice? I’m a waiter at the Toreros on main street.”
Toreros? That’s not a real restaurant, I thought, perplexed.
I watched as they passed the oimal around themselves. Galya, who was closest, pushed the pot and [apples] toward me. I sniffed it suspiciously. It didn’t smell any different, but I knew some drugs didn’t have a smell. But… I was hungry. Reluctantly, I served myself and pushed the pot away. Everyone began eating—aside from the gray. The fact that an ape was eating oats and fruit surprised me. I almost couldn’t believe it. And yet, there it was, right in front of me.
Xertalis scooped up some oimal daintily and blew steam off it. “I suppose I shall tell thou my story, and explain thy plight.”
The change of mood was palatable. The entire table stared at Xertalis, prepared for what she had to say.
“As I have said, I am Xertalis, the former goddess of time and space.” She raised her paw as the gray opened its mouth. “Many centuries ago, mortals believed in gods. They believed that they could bestow miracles, rend mountains and valleys to pieces, and offer enlightenment. Alas, those beliefs have faltered. That is why I am so weak.”
She took a slow sip of water.
“My powers have waned as mortals’ beliefs have waned.” She held an [apple] slice between her paws and turned it over. “I could not even age this fruit if I desired. If I tried to open a portal to your universe, it would kill me.”
The primate steepled its paws in front of it. “So how did we get here? Why did that book teleport us to… wherever the hell this is?”
Xertalis pondered the [apple] slice for a moment before popping it in her mouth. Once she had chewed, she spoke. “I would not rule out the fact there might be other forces at work. I might have been the goddess of time and space, but I am not the only deity with the ability to twist reality.”
The trio glanced at each other. “That’s not concerning at all,” The ape stated. “So… what do we do?”
“There is not much,” Xertalis said quietly.
“So we’re stuck here?” The primate cried. “Stuck in a universe where humans and gray are being genocided? Where the police shoot at innocent people? Where crazy bastards with flamethrowers run around?!”
“Wait,” Galya butted in, “what if we like, spread word of your existence?”
Xertalis stared at Galya. “And who would believe? Who would believe that a god walks amongst mortals?”
Galya tapped the table with her claw. “Uhhh… shit.”
“Well, there’s gotta be some sort of religious group somewhere, right?” The gray asked. “There’s the Church of Myern just down the street if I remember correctly.”
I flicked my ear affirmatively. “Yes, there’s a church. But… they might not be t-too fond of her eyes.” My voice faltered as they all looked at me. “Her eye placement? It’s abnormal.”
“So you’re telling me that normal Veyrians in this universe look like you?” The gray growled.
“Y-yes…?”
The gray rubbed its eyes. “Holy shit.” It held its claws up. “Look at this. I’m shaking.”
As the trio was processing what Xertalis had told them, she ate her oimal. Despite the fact she must’ve been starving, she ate slow and daintily, as if she had practiced eating in such a way for years and years. The fact she was eating calmed my nerves a little. But she’s a goddess—apparently—she might be immune to drugs. Or was she a goddess? Xertalis’ monologue confused me.
Nevertheless, I was hungry, and I didn’t function properly when I was hungry. I lifted a spoonful of oimal and ate it. The flavor caught me off guard. It was sweet and perfectly cooked; masterfully put together. I hadn’t ever expected oimal to taste as good as this. I found myself taking bite after bite.
The table was silent as everyone mulled over the information that Xertalis had disclosed. I glanced around the table. I felt a pang of bittersweet nostalgia as I watched the four of them eat. I physically recoiled in surprise. Galya glanced at me, perplexed, but I ignored her.
I turned over the feeling of nostalgia in my mind. It was strange. I shouldn’t be feeling this way about my literal enemies. And yet…
I looked at the wall opposite me. Among the paintings was a frame. And inside that frame, a family portrait. I stared at it for a long moment, emotions boiling in my chest.
You shouldn’t be feeling like this, Meyra, I thought half-heartedly. These are your enemies. They’d gladly rip you to shreds or stab you in the back if given a chance.
I glanced between the portrait and the small group at my table. It’s been so long… surely I could…? No. I took another bite of oimal, burning my mouth. I sipped my water quickly. No. That would be a death sentence. But the way Galya elbowed the gray and the primate playfully, and how they talked as if they were good friends…
Lost in my train of thought, I hadn’t noticed Xertalis had finished her food until she had stood up. “That was a most delicious meal,” she said. “I thank thee for thy culinary skills.” Xertalis bowed her head to the gray, who bowed its head in return.
“You’re welcome,” it growled. “It’s the least I could do.”
“I must now bathe myself. Where might your bathing room be?”
I pointed down the hallway. “Last door on the right. You can’t miss it.”
“Most appreciated.” And with that, Xertalis left the table.
I noticed the trio watching her as she left. I felt another pang of nostalgia in my chest. I immediately quelled it. Now wasn’t the time to be feeling sentimental.
The primate turned around. “She’s got an interesting way of talking, huh?”
The gray bobbed its head. “Yeah. But she’s a goddess apparently.” I tilted my head as I recognized the sound of skepticism in its grating voice.
Galya furrowed her brow and flicked her tail. Before she had a chance to speak, she was interrupted by Xertalis.
“I require assistance,” she said. “This bathing room lacks water.” She tilted her head slightly. “I know not how to draw it. Perhaps the girl could help me?”
Galya choked as she was taking a sip of water. Water dribbled down her chin. She recovered and turned to Xertalis, her cheeks tinted orange. “Uh—I’m sorry, b-but that’s like, not um… that—I don’t…”
Xertalis looked at the predators. “Perhaps one of the boys, then?”
I gawked as the primate’s face turned a bright shade of red. The gray’s face had grown noticeably darker as well. They glanced at each other and exchanged a silent conversation.
“Um, couldn’t—couldn’t she d-do it instead?” The primate pointed a long, gangly claw at me.
I stiffened. Me? I thought. “I-I can’t,” I blurted. “There’s, uh—I hurt my leg when I fell.”
“Your leg’s fine,” Galya said. She squinted at me. “It’s not really appropriate for kids to help an adult, anyway.”
“She just wants someone to help her figure out how the bath works!” I said indignantly. “That’s hardly inappropriate.”
“You’ll know how your bath works better than we do,” the ape interjected. “Besides, it is a little, uh, odd to make us do it.”
“But—” I began.
“I do not care who assists me,” Xertalis said in a low, steely voice. “Stop thy bickering and make thy choice.”
The trio stared at me. I stared back in disbelief. Did they want my heart to fail? Galya flicked her tail, indicating for me to hurry up. It was obvious that they weren’t going to move.
So it was all up to me.
I took a deep breath and clenched my paws. With great effort, I pushed myself away from the table. I tried to keep my breathing stable as I walked over to Xertalis. I avoided her eyes and motioned down the hallway.
“J-just this way,” I muttered. I glanced at the trio. Galya swished her tail supportively. The primate displayed its thumbs and bared its teeth. The gray whipped its tail across the floor erratically and flashed its razor-sharp fangs.
Suddenly dealing with Xertalis’ eyes didn’t seem like such a bad deal. Without another word, I speed-walked down the hallway.
Meyra, how in Xyek did you get yourself into this situation? I thought helplessly.
[Next]

Three days ago, my housemates were alive.
And I wasn't losing my fucking mind.
Three days ago, I awoke to my housemate, Misty, shaking me.
“Get up!!”
Misty was usually the last to roll out of bed out of all of us, so I figured it was something important. My housemate wouldn’t get out of bed for nothing. She valued her sleep—often comparing her bed to a safe haven. Her place of solitude. I was right there with her, until she startled me out of slumber. I opened my eyes to find her face roughly three inches from mine, her expression lit up with excitement I couldn’t justify this early in the morning.
She smelled of toothpaste breath and her raspberry scented body wash. Her thick black curls framing her face were still damp from what I presumed was a shower, hanging in tangled knots in front of wide, almost unseeing eyes. When I first met her, Misty Kang had been my crush for a while. With a Korean father and a Texan mother, she definitely caught eyes when we hung out. We had a thing in freshman year, which quickly fizzled out once we started living together. Never date your housemates.
I will just say that.
Over the last few years, Misty has become one of my closest friends.
When she knew I was at least conscious, my housemate was grabbing my arm and yanking me out of bed. “Get up!”
I was barely awake, and those were the only words I could fully distinguish.
I shooed her away for a moment and swung my legs out of bed, taking a minute to blink sunlight out of my eyes coming through the blinds. “Sam.” Misty was in front of me again.
I don’t think she understood the concept of being half asleep.
She wouldn’t leave me alone, waving her arms wildly. Her shadow under the soft morning light almost reminded me of one of those inflatable tube guys.
“Huh?” My voice was a low croak, and her smile widened.
“Guess who’s just scored tickets for an actual screening of the first five minutes of gameplay for the most anticipated game of the decade?”
“What?” Her string of words wasn’t making sense in my caffeine deprived mind. It just sounded like gibberish to me, initially.
Like we were in some cheesy commercial, she was the lead, and I was the confused NPC with the WTF expression. But when I went over it in my head, words started to slide together like a jigsaw puzzle. Misty didn’t get excited about video games. Well, she did. Though, my housemate was one to get excited on behalf of someone else. After living with her for a while now, I had concluded she was a follower.
By that, I mean whatever others thought or did or said, she copied it. If her Twitter followers were mad at bad takes, she would drop all of her own opinions on said follower and focus on what other people said. We had Korean barbecue for takeout the other day, and Misty clearly did not like it from the creased look on her face, and her very obviously spitting it politely into a napkin.
Jay, my other housemate, liked it.
And so did I. So, naturally, Misty announced she wanted more.
I had to watch her suffer through two more portions before she excused herself—presumably to throw up. Blinking at my housemate who was clearly excited for Jay, I resisted the overwhelming urge to roll my eyes.
“Slow down. What game? What are you talking about?”
I got out of bed and threw on my robe, half aware of the mess from last night on my desk. Another attempt to finish an essay which just wasn’t happening. The monster energy cans and takeout Chinese wrappers were embarrassing. I got a basic run-through as I headed downstairs with Misty right behind me, practically breathing down my neck. From what I understood, there was a Reddit post.
That was all I got from Misty’s squealing. She leapt down the stairs after me with a spring in her step. The clock above the front door told me it wasn’t even 9am. The smell of bacon, however, was quick to arise me from the dead.
Jay was in the kitchen making breakfast. I noticed his laptop was open on the table, and every so often he’d peer at it with wide, almost disbelieving eyes. Jay and Misty were complete opposites, which made them great people to live with. Jay was a quiet book who was slightly on the pretentious side, routinely quoting something philosophical to piss me off.
He had rich parents on the other side of the world, but the guy himself was fairly humble and had mostly detached himself from said family.
My housemate was usually well put together. In fact, I barely saw him in his pajamas, excluding game nights. That morning, however, he was a disheveled mess, still in yesterday’s clothes.
He offered me a grin. I glimpsed sauce from last night’s dinner still staining his chin. Jay hadn’t brushed his hair or even put on deodorant.
I caught a whiff of BO when he ducked in front of me, his gaze glued to his MacBook. It was rare when Jay ignored basic hygiene, so yeah, I was going to guess this was a pretty huge thing. “I did tell her not to wake you up, y’know.”
His slight aussie accent was always refreshing on a morning. Born in Australia and moving to the states when he was ten years old, Jay still had a slight tinge in his accent. I had seen pictures of his family, and the guy had definitely gotten most of his dad’s genes, thick brown hair, and freckles. While his dad was built like a pro wrestler however, Jay was leaner like his mom.
I shrugged. “I was already awake.”
“Liar.” He didn’t look away from his laptop.
Looking closer, I glimpsed the Reddit homepage.
“So, you have won something.”
Jay didn’t answer. I could tell he was excited by the way he could barely keep still, bustling around the kitchen, barefoot. “Coffee?”
His voice was more of a Misty-like squeak, and I half wondered for a moment if they had switched bodies, or he had at least become one with my other housemate through a chemical explosion. In our kitchen, which was yet to be cleaned after a cooking disaster several nights ago, I wouldn’t be surprised if something was living on the countertop. I nodded, slumping into a chair. “What’s going on? Why is Misty freaking out?” I nodded at his laptop. “She said you’ve won something?”
As if my housemate couldn’t hold it in anymore, he nodded, turning his screen towards me. “You know____, right?”
“Yes.” I sipped my coffee, eyeing a toaster strudel sitting on the countertop. "You mean the game which has been coming out for a decade."
He ignored that. “Well, what if I told you one of the developer’s posted on the official sub this morning?”
“For _____?"
He nodded with a grin, and I wondered it this was one of those rare times when Jay was blindly looking through a red flag to see what he wanted. I had heard of these types of scams, and Reddit was a breeding ground for them.
Gamers were pretty intense. I didn’t realize I was pulling a face until I caught his lips curving into a smile. Jay was usually the skeptical one.
“You don’t believe me.”
I downed my coffee to avoid replying. When I had drained the cup, he was still staring at me with amused eyes.
“What?”
“You think it’s bullshit.”
I shrugged. “You said it,” I said. “I’m pretty sure that game isn’t even partway through development. Didn’t Twitter leak a still last year? Also, they’ll be bringing out a new console before that game comes out.”
I leaned back in my chair. “It’s more of a pipe dream, at this point.”
“The leaks were fake,” Even he didn’t look sure. “Anyway, that’s not the point. One of the dev’s posted on the official sub this morning. He asked if we were all excited for the new game, asked if we could post some of our favorite NPC dialogue, and he’ll DM winners.”
“Uh-huh.” I nodded at the screen. I had already checked my phone for an internet meltdown concerning this post, but there was nothing. “And where is that post now?”
Jay didn’t look at me. “It was deleted. So it only reached a certain number of people.”
“Oh, it was deleted?” I couldn’t resist a smile. “What a coincidence.”
When I laughed, Jay scowled, showing me his screen—navigating his trackpad to his Reddit DM’s.
To my surprise, there was actually a message from what I guessed was a throw-away account.
While I was skim reading the DM, Misty hurried in, all dressed and ready for the day. I peeked at her outfit from Jay's laptop. Cute.
Extravagant, but cute. My housemate cranked the radio up before bouncing between us, a toaster strudel hanging out of her mouth.
Misty was a living animated character. Ignoring her wide smile, I turned back to the screen. “Congratulation!!” The DM started with capitals.
It took me reading it twice to realize there was a clear spelling mistake. I sent Jay a pointed look, but he was too busy practically vibrating with excitement. If the guy had any more caffeine, he was going to explode. “Since when did winning DM’s start with a typo?”
“I knew you were going to say that.” Jay curled his lip. “They were clearly excited when typing the message.”
“But this is supposedly an official,” I said. “Surely they would make sure it’s professional?”
My housemate didn’t reply, shooting a look at Misty, who rolled her eyes.
“Wow.” I squinted at the screen. “I am so sorry for caring about your safety. You do realize these types of scam’s usually end up with you being sold on the black market, right?”
I shuddered. “I’ve heard horror stories about underground markets specializing in illegal organ harvesting.”
“Or…” Jay’s eyes were glued to the screen. “You could be happy for me?”
I frowned at the rest of the message, which was just a capitalized freak-out about the upcoming release of the game, before inviting Jay (and a friend!) to a five-minute preview of gameplay, as well as a Q&A. There was a location and a time, which was brow-raising. “10 at night.” I said. “Who hosts a gaming convention at 10pm?” I leaned my chin on my fist. “Unless they wanted to lure as many gullible people as possible, and ship them to some organ harvesting factory on the other side of the world.”
Jay scoffed. “That’s dark.”
“You’re actually considering going to a 10pm gaming convention in the middle of nowhere. I’m trying to wake you up.”
Jay nudged me that time. “It’s real. Relax.”
“And.” I pointed to the screen. “No phones? Why would they ask you not to bring your phones?”
“To stop us filming content,” Misty sang. “Duh.”
I groaned, leaning back in my chair. “You’re on his side? This is clearly shady!” I didn’t get mad unless something was seriously pissing me off, and this was one of those times. Jay was a smart guy. There was no way he was falling for this bullshit. I thought he was joking around when he spent the day tracking the location on Google Maps. I went to class like normal and got updates through text. At lunch, Jay agreed with me and said it was in fact shady, and he wasn’t going. By afternoon classes, he was texting me in paragraphs explaining his own skepticism but had found several “friends” on an online forum who were also going and had changed his mind once again. The guy couldn’t make up his mind. He was driving me crazy.
Misty sent me several videos of Jay pacing the kitchen with his MacBook in his hands. She was broadcasting his mental breakdown via Instagram stories. But then she started to send me pictures of herself in different outfits, asking me for my opinion on each one. At that point, I turned my phone off. My housemates had lost their fucking minds. I did my own research though, just to make sure I wasn’t actually going to lose them to a shady cult.
I searched for the game itself, but just as I thought, it was shown as still in development. Every “update” was just fan speculation.
There were YouTube videos and TikTok’s of fake leaks, but nothing was real. It was either AI generated, or badly edited. By the time my classes had ended and I had turned my phone on, I had a barrage of missed calls and texts.
Most of them were from Misty with her outfit changes, and Jay changing his mind again.
This time he was convinced it was all a scam, his texts full of typos and crying emoji's which he never used. Before it hit me that Misty was most likely using his phone to text me.
I was right. When I walked through the door, I was greeted by both of them sitting on the stairs. Misty was scrolling through Jay’s phone, while the boy had his head in his hands. According to Misty’s last text, he was back to being excited to go.
From the look on his face, eyes shadowed with sleep circles, light brown curls slipping from under his hood, I wasn’t sure what Misty meant by “excited”. The guy looked the complete opposite. His mind had been consumed by the game, and the idea of seeing new content.
When I dropped my bag and folded my arms, fixing the two of them with my best disapproving parent look, Misty jumped to her feet. “Sam!” she waved Jay’s phone at me. “Did you get my texts? We’re actually going now!”
The 100+ texts on both messenger and iMessage said otherwise.
I nodded, my gaze on Jay. “Both of you do realize it’s a scam, right?” I softened my tone despite growing progressively more irritated. We were grown adults, not kids. I could understand a group of teenagers falling for it, but two twenty-three-year-olds?
This time, I ducked in front of Jay. “Hey.” I pulled down his hood, and he groaned, burying his head in his knees. “I don’t want to freak you out, so listen to me, okay?”
I exhaled out a breath. “I’m not saying something bad is going to happen to you, because it most likely won’t—and yes, I admit I’m being paranoid.” When he lifted his head, blinking through bedraggled curls, there was a faint smile on his lips. “But.” I said. “You are most likely going to end up disappointed. Which I don’t want, because you won't shut up about it for weeks."
I was only partly joking.
For a moment, I thought my housemate was going to wake up, and nod, laughing at how crazy it was.
Before shook his head and jumped up.
“I’m going to take a shower, alright? I should start getting ready."
I admit, I exploded at him.
We argued while he was in the shower, and I paced up and down the hallway, coming up with multiple reasons why he was definitely going to die, and only two positives if it was in fact real. In the end, I gave up worrying all together. I didn’t say anything when the two of them were hurrying around looking for shoes and missing car keys. I didn’t realize they were gone until the door was clanging shut, and a text was coming through. I didn’t look at it until an hour later, and I had calmed down.
Jay: 1h ago: Stop worrying, lmao. We’re good! I’ll keep my phone just in case. I’ll make sure to avoid the organ harvesting 😉
Another from Misty a few minutes later: “Love you! Chillll, kay? 😭😭 It’s going to be fun! I’ll take pics!”
…
Followed by: “Oh shit, we can’t. I’ll try to sneak some!"
Attached to the text was a photo of the two of them. Misty with a wide smile and a peace sign, and Jay who looked like he was mid-shout, his eyes on the road.
Those texts were… at least comforting, I guessed. Maybe they were right. I figured I was paranoid, and they in fact would really be okay.
But that didn’t stop the anxious coil in my gut when I tried to force down takeout pizza. I attempted to focus on my essay to distract myself, but I couldn’t stop glancing at my phone, and checking Twitter. There was a hashtag on the DM, which was just “PlayStationGO.” When I searched for it, however, nothing came up.
Sure, it was a private convention and only a select few knew about it, but nothing could escape Twitter.
Somewhere, someone must be talking about it. After scrolling through endless tweets though, I realized I was wrong. There was nothing.
That put a bad taste in my mouth.
10pm came, and I held my breath all the way through a Netflix TV show I was forcing myself to watch, half asleep, slumped at my desk.
I could barely distinguish the plot.
I just had a vague idea of the character names, and some of their motivations.
Midnight passed, and I was struggling to stay awake.
I glanced at my phone.
No messages, just a notification from Spotify reminding me my favorite band was playing nearby.
1am.
Still nothing. I fell back to sleep.
2:48am.
This time, I stayed awake for a few minutes glaring at my phone before my eyes grew heavy.
3:16: am.
My phone buzzed with a text from Jay, but I could barely desipher it: "can't feel help my head hurts Canshdhsn727272_6798mi/!! _&go home please. (Sent from: PlayStationGo™️ BETA)."
3:27: am.
3:54: am. I was wide awake, blinking at a notification which had popped up from an unknown number. I was trying to figure out what number it was, when my phone vibrated again and I almost jumped out of my skin.
After a moment of hesitation, I answered it.
I was trying so hard not to think of the possibility of it being the emergency room, or even worse, the cops.
All of my worst nightmares had come true in a single second.
“Hello?” I whispered in a croak.
“Are they in the house with you?” The stranger’s voice came through in a hiss of interference.
His words sent my mediocre dinner lurching back up my throat. “What?” I managed to get out. “Who?”
“Your friends.” He said, and I leapt to unsteady feet, my gut twisting and turning.
“No.” I found myself taking slow strides toward the window, brushing back the curtain and peering out into the night. “Why? Did something happen to them?” I paused.
“How did you get my number?”
“That does not matter.” His voice rattled in my ear as I rushed downstairs, almost stumbling down the bottom two. “I need you to get out of that house. Now. Get as far away as possible.”
I could hear his rapid breaths.
He was driving. I could hear the rumble of the engine. With my phone pressed to my ear, I obeyed his instructions, pulling open the door and stepping out into the cool night, a brisk breeze grazing my bare arms was just enough to stop my thoughts spiraling.
I was barefoot, in nothing but a robe, staggering down the driveway. The night was calm and silent; our neighborhood was asleep, each window drowned in darkness. I couldn’t breathe, my clammy fingers wrapped around my phone, as this stranger broke down over the phone. “Whatever you do,” he gasped out.
“Do not, I repeat DO NOT remove the PlayStationGo—shit!! He hissed out, static rattling the call. The guy seemingly got ahold of himself, and the wheel, and continued. I started to walk—where I was going, I had no idea.
The stranger lit a cigarette. I heard the click of a lighter and his exhalation of breath. “It was a BETA version, but we had to rush it. This was not my idea. My boss is a greedy man. He wanted to release the game last year, which would have meant widespread infection. Luckily, that did not happen. We did manage to delay it, but only by a year.” His words barely made sense to me as I struggled to get a word in, peering in the dark. “It was supposed to be a virtual experience of the game—a whole new angle of gameplay. But testing was difficult. First, on monkey’s, we lost multiple subjects. Tonight was supposed to be a…well, I guess you could call it out first attempt on human subjects,” his laugh was bitter. “I knew the tech wasn’t finished. And I tried. Believe me, I fucking tried. I tried to blow the whistle, but these bastards know where my parents live."
Something squirmed its way down my spine.
“So my friends were lab rats?” I said stiffly. “You used them?”
I fucking knew it.
I knew it was too good to be true.
“Yes and no. Listen to me, the people I work for are hunting them down. Trust me, I don’t want my bosses to find them because a life of experimentation will await them. Torture. Do you hear me? It does not matter if subjects fail. They don’t care. As long as there is at least a light at the end of the tunnel for them, they will see it as a win, and bring the publication date closer. They will not be treated as humans. Your friends signed a contract before trying out the tech, where the small print stated that, under section 3, player engagement, all subjects must agree to offer themselves as participants in later updates. I silently cursed Jay for always skipping the terms and conditions when buying games." The man stopped to breathe.
“I have told you multiple times, and I won’t say it again. Get as far away from that house as possible. I will take care of them. I will make sure of it." The sound of squealing engines, and I stopped power walking, coming to an abrupt stop. The silence of the night around me, compared to the sound of the highway he was on, traffic horns and the wind rushing through the window was an eerie contrast, a disturbance to the heavenly bubble we were trapped in.
“What do you mean ‘take care of them?” I had to swallow a yell. “Hey! What are you talking about?
“I’m sorry.” Was all he replied with. “I’m afraid it is too late. There was once an opportunity to save the mind during the initial level of the demonstration. However, once the PlaystationGo has been fully attached to the base of the subject, we no longer have control of it. Once integrating itself into the cerebral cortex, the PlayStationGo can only be removed by signing out of the player’s account,” his breath was heavy. “On this unfortunate occasion, however, your friends are unable to navigate the system due to a malfunction which scrambled their brains,” He trailed off. “Which has left them stranded in the game."
I let out a breath. “Right.” I said. “That’s.. bad. I mean, it’s a fucked-up piece of technology, but they’re just playing a game, right?”
There was a pause, before the man laughed.
“Young man, I don’t think you understand,” he said. “The PlayStationGo was created to give the player a full virtual experience of our game. The PlayStationGo is not a physical object. Created with nanotechnology, it attaches itself to the subject’s brain and is supposed to create a personal gaming experience for each player. As I said, however, it is not finished. It is yet to be released to the public, and of course, we are expecting certain ethical arguments due to the controversial—”
I pulled the phone away from my ear, shaking my head. I didn’t need to hear his attempts at trying to save his own skin.
“You need to help them,” I whispered. “Do you hear me? Can you do that? Can you help them?!”
“That is what I am trying to tell you,” He said.
“I know you are upset and confused, and believe me, I offer my apologies. But you need to listen to facts. During initial testing, our subjects were conscious enough to know where their home was. We are unsure why this happens, though we have linked it to territory, as well as the main character of the game heavily influencing their actions. I have been tracking them from the testing facility, and they are incredibly close. Please get as far away from there as possible. If you are no longer in the vicinity of the house, I can end this quickly and quietly before we gain attention.”
I wasn’t sure what I was going to say. Maybe start fucking screaming at him, because he was talking about getting “rid” of my friends, after their mistake.
“Do you understand me?” He said, when I couldn’t reply. “Your friends are lost causes!”
Before I could answer, though, headlights were suddenly coming around the corner, and I found myself paralysed to the spot. The car which swerved twice, crashed into several trash cans, before reversing and coming straight towards me, was not Jay’s car. Jay’s car was an old hunk of junk he’d gotten from a scrapyard. Jay’s car had doors which were practically hanging off, and a stereo which exclusively played either static gibberish, or old tapes I had no idea how to use. This car was bright yellow, and definitely had an option to drive itself. When the car came to a stop, inches from careening into me, I lost all control of myself.
I was vaguely aware of my phone slipping from my fingers and hitting the sidewalk. But I was too busy staring at the two shadows in the front of the car. The driver, and the passenger.
And the muffled screaming coming from the trunk.
When the door swung open, a figure stepping out, I did not recognise my housemate.
The stranger told me I wouldn't, but I didn't believe him.
Jay had left the house in casual jeans and a sweater, bearing the game's logo.
Now, I found myself face to face with a man with my housemate's face and features, his smile and eyes-- but something had been severed in his eyes and twisted in his expression. For one, Jay was wearing a suit I knew he couldn't afford, the sleeves torn, collar pulled open, smears of red staining the front.
His pants had cufflinks, and the Rolex on his wrist had definitely been pulled off someone's corpse.
The silver was stained a revealing scarlet. Drinking in his face, he looked like Jay. His curls hung in front of his eyes, freckles speckling his cheeks, but everything else wasn't. It wasn't until I was glimpsing what was moulded into the flesh of his hand, did I remember how to move. But then I was taking all of him in, everything my mind had intentionally skipped, because I didn't want to believe the stranger on the phone. Nanotechnology, the man had said in a hiss.
Fiction, I had thought.
Before I saw the reality of it, a writhing metallic like substance glued to the guy's temple, and slowly, very slowly, inching down his cheek, already forming around the bridge of his ear, a very faint blue light flickering.
Something must have alerted him. His cavernous eyes left mine, and he twisted his head—and I heard the sound of his neck snapping, his head lolling to the left slightly, his eyes flickering. I watched his whole body seem to sway back and forth, ready to fall forwards.
Before the newly formed device on his ear turned red, then green.
It was almost like he was… rebooting. As if coming back to life, Jay lifted his head at an awkward angle, before looking straight through me. The blood vessels in his eyes had popped, rivulets of red beading down his face. He should have been dead, I thought. No. No, he was dead. That… that thing was keeping him alive. “Well, shiiiittt,” he said. I could sense the game dialogue which had taken over him, forming on his mangled tongue.
“I’m a man on a mission.”
In jerking movements, he turned and marched back towards the car, opening the door, and sliding into the front seat.
I remembered how to move, ducking to grab my phone, before something slammed into the back of my head—and I saw stars.
I didn’t remember hitting the floor, only the soft sound of her voice, a seductive murmur repeating NPC dialogue, and her kitten heel sticking into my spine, forcing me onto my face.
Misty. I was expecting her to get it over with. But when she dragged me to my feet, sticking the barrel of a gun into the flesh of my neck—I figured she was still playing the game.
Twisting around to meet her eyes, lifeless and empty, only filled with light from the device which had taken over half of her face, I felt sick to my stomach. This thing wasn’t a games console or a virtual reality headset.
It was an attempt at coercing and programming something you already don’t understand, to do something impossible.
I could see that in the way the things had visibly chewed and eaten through her flesh, devouring her from the inside and out. I could see what was left of the dress she had worn earlier, but something must have gone wrong with her too. Because Misty had thrown on another outfit over the top, a diamond necklace hanging from her neck.
I caught a thin river of red pooling down her right temple, trying to ignore the twitchy way she moved, just like a character. From the way Misty walked, stumbling, I already knew she was gone. My housemate had newly acquired strength, throwing me in the trunk of the car where three other hostages were, and slamming it shut on my attempts to reason with her. She didn’t tie me up or restrain me.
In the dim light I could just make out though passing streetlights, I could see the trunk opened from the inside. Which was too easy.
Still though, Jay was driving recklessly, and every time I tried to throw the damn thing open, I was knocked backwards, rolling into a screaming girl, who was bound by her hands and feet. It took me multiple attempts before I had the trunk open, freezing cold air blasting me in the face. I untied the other hostages, but when I told them to come with me, they just stared blankly at me, and continued begging for their lives—and it only took me glimpsing what was attached to their temples, a familiar writhing metal plate, for me to understand. They too were playing the game. This time, as NPC hostages.
I found myself gingerly touching the trembling metallic flesh of the girl's fingers bound in rope. It had a slimy consistency, and I swore, I felt something bite into me.
No way, I thought.
This thing was sentient, yes. But it wasn't living.
Listen, I wish I could tell you what it was like to jump out of a moving car, but I can’t.
I remember it as lunging out of the trunk, hitting the freezing cold air, before hitting the ground head first, neutron star collisions exploding in the backs of my eyes.
What I do remember is waking up on the side of the road. Hours later. The sky was bright blue, a scorching sun blinding me when I managed to force my eyes open.
The early morning rush hour flew by as normal, and I wondered how ignorant American people had to be to ignore someone knocked out on the side of the road.
It’s not like I was nowhere near civilization. There was a fucking Subway right next to me.
When I had gathered myself, I remembered I had no phone. I couldn’t go home in fear of running into my rogue housemates playing their own fucked up version of _____ in their head. My plan was to try and find my phone, get in contact with the stranger who blew the whistle on my friends being dangerous, and find them. They couldn’t be far., right? And even if they weren’t themselves… someone would be able to save them.
If someone could do this to them, surely they could reverse it.
I felt sick, tired, and I was starving.
So, with some loose cash I’d found in my pocket, I bought a Subway and a Coke.
The woman at the counter smiled widely at me. She leaned forward, with a wink. “Nice cosplay!”
Cosplay?
I didn’t understand what she meant until I swore I felt something… move its way up my pant leg. I ignored it, and it happened again, this time it felt like something was… biting.
A bug, maybe? I had been laying on the side of the road for around six hours.
When I went to the bathroom, though, I found myself staring at an all too familiar glint of silver creeping its way across my temple. Like it was sentient, parts of it sider webbed towards my ear while the rest writhed into my hairline.
I pulled up my pant leg again, and there it was, a fungus-like metal substance which had already formed in two solid metal masses on my knees. I remember grazing two fingers across the thing beginning its slow feast of my flesh. I remember trying to pull it off, hissing in pain when I risked ripping off my own skin with it. I remember shaking my head and being in denial, even when the lights dimmed above me, and the bathroom door in front of me became more of a shadow. When I strode back through the Subway store, I began to see slight flickers of light above each person, highlighting something not quite there yet.
I could see it already starting, beginning to take over my thoughts. Cars which sped past were suddenly highlighted, and at the corner of my eye, if I concentrated, the outline of a map was starting to appear. Even now, when the room is almost completely taken over by shadow, and my thoughts are half my own, and half not—when a metallic device is beginning to form over my eyes—I know if I hold on, this thing won’t take me. I have considered killing myself, but that wouldn’t… be right.
How could I kill myself when there is so much left to do?
This developer was right. I don’t even know where I can sign out. There’s what looks like the beginning of some kind of index when I look up, but it’s not… finished. I can still see entangled pieces of code struggling to load what I’m guessing was log out. Whatever this thing is, it’s taking over me. Fast. Like a fungus, like a virus, it will not stop until it’s dragged me into the game, until it's leeched itself onto me.
I can feel it happening right now. It's been slow.
Almost painfully slow.
But maybe that is the point. Maybe part of the game is to feel my own thoughts beginning to unravel in favor of something else entirely.
Fuck.
Time is going by…. Fast.
Five minutes ago… I was trying to get home. But I can’t remember where I live.
I can’t concentrate.
I can’t think straight.
I have a phone—but I don’t know how I got it. Did I steal it?
Every time I move, the slowly emerging map comes to life at the corner of my eye jerks with my movement. There is a car parked nearby.
I know it belongs to the man with a child.
But a confusing blur of light is highlighting it to be something of importance. Reality is crashing in front of me, replaced with contorting shapes and bursts of color I have to blink through.
I keep hearing... sirens.
Jay is messaging me.
On what, I'm not sure.
But I need to find him.
I’m sure one mission won’t hurt, right?

OK, time to sit up straight because I am going to spill some tough love on the men in the community.
This is regarding online dating. This is supposed to serve as a compass for you to navigate yourself correctly through the journey.
This piece is based on three things:
- My own experience with online dating.
- Insights uncovered while helping three cis-gendered, male friends with their dating-app profiles to understand the 'why'(s) and 'how'(s) of Communication and Perception in dating.
- Over a decade of being a Communication and Strategy professional in the corporate sector.
​
(However, if you use dating apps for one-night stands and casual relationships, you can stop here. This post may end up wasting your time.)
​
1) First of all — treat yourself like a 'product' and position yourself accordingly in the market.
Take time to:
- Understand your SWOT.
- Understand your competitor (it is not who you think it is).
- Understand your consumer.
I will elaborate on each one of these later.
​
2) Understand your SWOT:
SWOT stands for Strength, Weakness, Opportunity, and Threat.
Map it out for yourself, and then...
Work on actually having a personality.
What does not count as 'Personality'?
Going to the gym is not your whole personality.
Your bike/car, or your love for them cannot be your whole personality.
Your height, colour of your eyes etc are not your personality.
BladerunneRPG is not your whole personality.
F.R.I.E.N.D.S. cannot be your whole personality.
And your job, definitely, is not your whole personality.
Therefore, when you put 3 out of 5 pictures from your gym, it puts you in a very crowded room that is jam-packed with other gym-goers, lumping your whole personality as a 'Gym Bro'.
When you lack personality, then it is not that you aren't 6'3" tall and hence women aren't choosing you. Learn to see things for what they are.
Ok, but what is Personality then?
Personality is a combination of goals, fears, aspirations, dreams, hopes, likes, dislikes, beliefs etc — attributes that make you 'you'.
Capitalize on each one of these.
Learn to leverage even your weakness by leaning into it.
For example, if you are a guy who is not a fan of English language, and can't for the life of you understand why people don't speak in Hindi, then why are you writing your profile in English, and slogging your posterior off to attract a Starbucks-sipping chica who may not value what you bring to the table?
Instead, channel your inner Harishankar Parsai and write your profile in Hindi.
When you do that, you will have automatically sifted out anyone who is judgmental about your preferred language, and in fact, you may end up attracting someone who will help you paint the town red over this shared interest!
So, keeping everything aside, understand who you are. The better you understand yourself, the easier the dynamics are going to be.
​
3) Learn. To. Write. Sentences.
Complete sentences. With commas, em dashes, and colons.
Do not put five pictures on your profile with one or two words answers to prompts. Learn to put together coherent thoughts.
It shows your ability to express yourself.
Also, expressing yourself is cool.
Stoicism is fine but Zeno of Citium and Marcus Aurelius did not have to spend their life getting left-swiped in the era that is striving to ensure gender equality. Nor were they fighting battles in a hyper-individualistic world.
They had armies to keep them together. Remember this.
​

Language was invented for one reason, boys--- to woo women---and in that endeavor, laziness will not do.
Dead Poet Society

​
4) Re-evaluate your brand-messaging. (Understand your consumer)
Do all/most of your pictures have you posing next to a Merc/BMW etc, and then you cry about attracting gold-diggers?
If you are not looking to attract gold-diggers, tell us what do you bring to the table? Do you have skills required for 'adulting' like keeping a house, planning a meal and ordering for grocery? Do you know basic cooking? If your mom (or someone else) does it all for you, pause dating for a while and contribute to unpaid efforts that go in keeping you alive.
What does it do, you ask?
It softens rough edges of your personality, develops emotional maturity and an ability to estimate and take on the impact of silent mental load. It gives you something real to talk about. It gives the other person something relatable to benchmark you against.
Relationships are much more than booking OYO for a few hours.
(There is a reason your cool collection of Legos cannot be a part of this 'what you bring to the table' exercise. I will explain it later.) Assess if you actually have a personality or are you a humanoid who can code (or whatever else it is that you do), and otherwise bring very little to the table.
​
5) Speaking of Gold Diggers...
Some of you men disintegrate and combust into flames the minute a girl tells you that she is looking for someone who is better off financially (or has a benchmark that requires money).
Why?
Do you not switch your job for better prospects?
Do you not look for someone way hotteprettie smarter than you are?
How are women not allowed to have a richer partner? Please explain.
(I am not asking whether she is a student, banking on dad's money, or hustling at work herself in this case. It does not matter. If you have a wishlist, she too has one. Can you match up? No? Move on then. What is the logic behind becoming bitter about it?)
​
6) To attract the right mate, you need to become the right mate.
For some weird reason, one of the friends I was helping said something that meant something like he will straighten up for the right girl.
Bro, what.
This is not how it works. It, in fact, works the other way round.
You focus on becoming the right person and that takes you one step closer to finding 'the one'. If you are a mess when the right one comes along, they are likely to walk right past you.
You dress up and then go to the bus-stop, wait for the right bus, and board it when it reaches the bus-stop you are at. You don't show up at the bus stop nude and start dressing up the minute your bus pulls up.
​
7) "bUt dOn't wOMEn waNt eQuality?"
They do.
Plus, nobody is trying to rip you off of the four pennies you have saved after 5 years of grind and hustle. Last of all women who have worked their *ss off and fought centuries of patriarchy to get a seat at the table.
Women like to pay for their meals happily, at least the ones I know. However, there will be some who will expect you to foot the bill. It is possible that she is looking for a mate who can afford to take her out for dates totally on his own. She is well within her rights to have this expectation. And you are well within yours to refuse to meet it.
If such is the case, do not let this make you salty and call her a 'gold-digger'.
It is indicative of a poverty-mindset towards money. Instead, use it as marker to understand your relationship with money.
But that aside, if you cannot afford to take both of you out for a coffee/desserts date, take a break from dating and work on your financial health first, because it will keep you stressed and while you cry about having to pay for coffee, another dude would sweep her off her feet because...
...most women may not be looking for you to have 10 billion dollars in your bank account, but in case you both intend on getting married and having a family together, they have a right to assess if you can afford the fact that she can take some time off her work and look after herself (after the delivery) and the baby without your family getting driven to poverty. I understand Maternity leaves and all, but women's brains are prepared to deal with the worst, and they factor in everything and more, even if subconsciously. It contributes to them feeling 'safe' regarding the future. (Not all women, but many. And this is no sin.)
(I am talking about an average scenario. If you are a person whose dynamics worked out in a circumstance different from this, good for you. I have approximated this basis what my guy friends came across in the dating pool. This depends on the privileges, level of education, upbringing, mindset etc, and sometimes varies from person to person within the same family.)
​
8) Speaking of Equality...
... I hope your house-keeping, care-taking, and cooking skills are in alignment with the kind of contribution you are expecting from your partner in terms of finances.
Equality is not a one-way street. And no, I 'let her' drink is not Equality.
​
9) If you are looking for a one-night-stand, state it upfront, the first thing. For some weird reason, the max amount of respect is garnered by guys who mention this right in the beginning. Or, better still, mention it on your profile itself, saves everyone the hassle.
​
10) Emotional Intelligence
There will be m-a-n-y things, in life and on the internet, that you may not like. If at all, this is where you need to practice Stoicism.
Don't believe that there should be more genders than two? Cool, keep scrolling.
Don't understand what is this 'they/them' business in pronouns of individuals? No problem. Put forth your point in a civilized manner and move on. You don't have to dunk on people.
See a 43-year-old unmarried woman asking for advice regarding her love-life? Do you have something constructive to contribute? No? Keep scrolling.
Some lady wore sleeveless to the office? Unless you have something positive to say, keep your opinion to yourself.
See a 63 YO 'aunty' on a dating app? Are you interested? No? Keep Swiping.
Understand that the world does not need your permission exist. (Yes! I know! I am equally baffled!)
​
Your inherent need to straighten the World does two horrible things to you:

• You end up focusing on things that should be none of your business, thereby adding no value to your own life. At worst, you become an outdated version of your parents (who, by the way, might have still been relevant in their times) in a world that needs you to be hyper-agile in your mindset (and regarding your ability to change your opinion and understand the other person's perspective). But I understand that this may be quite a tall order for the majority of the people.

​

• Every time you hyper-fixate on fixing things outside of you, you lose the opportunity that could have either given you a better understanding of something you don't have the first-hand understanding of, or helped you focus on yourself.

​
There is no magic wand to becoming an emotionally intelligent person. In the era of tech and ChatGPTs, your EQ is what will make you stand out. Period.
​
11) Self-worth.
Pause, and understand your worth, (or the lack of it). Don't just randomly hope to be swiped right by anyone. If you are marred by low self-worth, it reflects in every aspect of your life, including how you talk. Take a break from dating and work on your self-worth.
Building self-worth is an inside job.
There is a friend I have who is a Coder by the day and a Baker by the night. Once or twice every month, he invites us over for an evening of chilling around where we also get to sample the latest recipes of cake, quiches, pizzas, and breads he has tried.
The dude is 35YO, the most zen person I know, has never had to be on dating apps because his hobby has everyone chasing him for recipes, 'let's bake together?' (s), ingredients etc. Not a one-night-stand sort of guy, so the street-cred works in his favor. When he dates, he sticks to a lady until things don't work out for whatever genuine reason there is. Once he and the lady part ways, both of them never bad-mouth each other.
Take from that what you will.
Working on your self-worth is stacking up of favorable actions, one after the other. There is no abra-ca-dabra to this.
Also,

• Refrain from becoming someone because of whom women have to close their DMs. Over time, you will lose respect for yourself, and that happens very silently.

​

• There is a difference between speaking the truth and being harsh. Your ability to learn the difference and the art will single-handedly be responsible for success in your profession as well as your personal life.

​

• For some weird reason, a 25 YO man from a Western country is far more emotionally evolved as compared to an Indian man. That is one part of it. The other part of it is that most Indian men are so surrounded by their own type, that they r-e-a-l-l-y will have to break a lot of cycles to even fathom what is expected of them. To break this cycle, educate yourself ruthlessly. Accounts like this may help you break the mould to some extent, but you will still need to break the cycle with respect to your surroundings. Hangout with men who see women in positive light.

​

• The women you are trying to woo, have their standards constantly reset by content from all over the world. You have to understand what you are up against.

​
12) Understand how Reticular Activating System works regarding attracting the right mate.
Reticular Activating System is explained the best here.
And how to hack it is explained here.
From Marketing and Communication stand-point, no brand spends h-o-u-r-s ridiculing and hating on the prospective consumer. Instead, they spare no efforts in getting to know their consumer and then tailoring their offerings to ensure that the consumer sticks around.
This is what I mean when I say know your Comsumer.
(Anyway, what is the point of hating on women throughout the day, and then crying here in the group at night asking for feedback on your dating profile to woo, drumrolls, those same women?)
When it comes to women, your competition is not another man. It is her peace of mind. This is what I mean when I say 'know your Competitor'.
​
13) What makes dating difficult?
Not the process.
It is you hoping that it was easier.
But this is one aspect that demands ruthless growth. Just embrace the pain and hardships of getting left-swiped on and use it to upgrade your mindset and mentality. But all the while, be kind to yourself and know that you are doing your best.
​
14) One last thing...
Analyze if any part of your childhood/teenage was chaotic or traumatic. What we experience in our childhood, if left untreated, goes on to become our 'normal' in adulthood.
So, if you grew up in chaos, peace would seem boring to you. You will constantly look for 'spark' instead of comfort and end up attracting damaged goods.
If your childhood was not peaceful, it may be worthwhile to consider therapy. Therapy is good, it brings out the gunk of the soul that you did not know you were carrying around, all the while stinking because of it.
If you are interested in understanding this better, read Letting Go and Attached.
The thing is, you attract your tribe.
If you are attracted to someone, something in them must have resonated with you. Surprisingly, many times, it is the toxity that binds two people together.
And toxity in oneself is the most difficult to accept.
To stop attracting damaged goods, you will have to heal yourself.
You will be surprised what a therapist can do. You may have to look around for a while before you chance upon a good one though. Twitter has two crowd-sourced list, in case you need: List 1, List 2.
​
Notice how I haven't touched upon topics like what you should write in your bio/profile or what you should message her because these things are a direct manifestation of who you are. They can be 'manufactured' but only to some extent. The mind games last only for so long. After that, you will have to work on yourself.
I hope this makes sense to some extent and someone. Take time to read this. I don't expect anyone of you to get all of it in one go.
If you disagree, happy to hear your point of view.
Thank you for reading!
Have a lovely dating journey.

Griddle grates are an essential part of any outdoor grill, providing a flat surface for cooking food and preventing it from falling through the grates. There are two main types of grill grates: stainless steel and cast iron. Stainless steel grill grates are popular for their durability and resistance to rust, making them easy to clean and maintain. They are also lighter in weight compared to cast iron grates, making them easy to handle and move around.
Cast iron grill grates, on the other hand, are heavier and more durable, making them ideal for high-heat cooking. Cast iron retains heat well, allowing for more even cooking and providing grill marks on the food. However, cast iron requires proper maintenance, including regular cleaning of grill gates and seasoning, to prevent rusting and maintain their non-stick properties. It's also important to consider replacement grill grates if they become worn or damaged, as this can negatively impact the cooking experience. Whether you choose stainless steel or cast iron grates for a grill, proper care and maintenance will help ensure that they last for many grilling seasons to come.

THE PIZZA BURGER PIE
Ingredients
Dough:
2 cans of pizza dough or your favorite pizza dough recipe you will need two dough rolls.
1/2 cup tomato sauce for pizza
For the stuffing
1 pound ground beef
1 teaspoon table salt
1/4 teaspoon black pepper
1 tablespoon chopped onion
1/2 teaspoon dry Italian seasoning
3/4 cup tomato paste
4 oz sliced canned mushrooms optional
Toppings:
2 cup mozzarella cheese
1 cup cheddar cheese
1 sliced tomato
pepperoni to taste
1/2 cooked chopped ham or bacon
Instructions
Heat oven to 375°F
Prepare stuffing and set aside. Make a large hamburger patty (9 inches in diameter and 1 inch high).
Cook the giant patty in a skillet until cooked but juicy but not dry.
Spread one of the pizza cups in a greased 9- or 10-inch pie pan to make a crust. Place the hamburger on the crust, top with the cheddar cheese.
Roll out the second pizza crust and place it on top of the hamburger.
Top with pizza tomato sauce, mozzarella and pepperoni.
Bake for 30 to 35 minutes, or until lightly browned. Sprinkle with bacon. Serve immediately.

Meeting and first dates

I (29m) met a woman (26f) on OkCupid. She's really pretty, and she makes these amazing cosplays. While I don't really have the time nor skills to make my own cosplays, I've always greatly admired them.
I'm definitely an activity-oriented person, and I love doing stuff like board games, amusement parks, and other fun things (well, I think they're fun, at least). So, for dates, I always try to plan an activity, so that if it doesn't work out, at least I had fun with the activity, and it doesn't feel like a wasted night.
For our first date, we went to a brewery where we had drinks, ate pizza, and played board games. The next week, she was too busy to hang out in-person, so we had a video chat. For our second date, we went to a small amusement park where we played mini-golf, did bumper boats, and ate ice cream, before going back to my place where we ate takeout and played her favorite video game that many of her cosplays are based on.
While I really struggle reading people, she seemed into me, and it seemed like she wanted to get together again.

Planning the third date

She was busy the next week, but we made plans to hang out the Friday after that (two weeks from our second date) when we were both off from work. I was going to cook her dinner, and we would play more her favorite video game. The only snag was that she didn't yet know what time she was coming. As a meticulous planner, this really bothered me, but I decided to let it go, since at least I knew the day she was coming.
It wasn't until the day before (Thursday) that she told me she was driving her dad to the doctor at about 3:30p, and she wouldn't be available until that was done. While I was disappointed that she wouldn't be coming until late (I thought we would spend the whole day together), I am family-oriented, and I know the importance of helping family, so I told her I totally understood.
When Friday came, the forecast said there was going to be thunderstorms, so she said she didn't feel comfortable driving to me. I was really disappointed, but she said we could still video chat. So, I put the chicken I had defrosted for her into the fridge, and we hopped on a video call.
She was working the next day (Saturday) until about noon, and then on Sunday she was going to an art museum with her friends. I asked if she wanted to come over after work on Saturday, where I could cook her that meal I had promised, and she said she would see if she was too tired or not.
When I reached out to her the next day, she said she was too tired to come over. I expressed sympathy, but I really wanted to see her, so I asked what time she was coming back from the museum the next day.
And I never heard from her again.

Thoughts and reflection

I reached out late on Wednesday to say "Hi", but she never got back to me. It looks like I was being too pushy about hanging out, and I scared her off. But, maybe this is for the best? I am a meticulous planner, and while I'm definitely an introvert, I like to go out and do fun things with people. While I enjoy the planning process, and I'm totally fine doing all of the planning myself, all I ask in return is that I get a date and time when they are available, and she couldn't even do that.
Maybe I'm just crazy, and people are never going to be willing to make plans. Maybe I'm right, and asking for a date and time to hang out is reasonable. Maybe getting together in-person at least once every two weeks is unreasonable, especially when you've only gone on two in-person dates? What does everyone think? Should I just lower my expectations of planning (especially that early in a relationship), or should I try to find someone who can make that kind of commitment? Is there something I need to work on about myself?
Note: This is an edited version of the original I wrote that was around 1,300+ words long (this is about 700 words long). I tried to cut it down so it is not too long while still explaining the important points, but if anyone thinks I should post the long version, please let me know!

Hi all,
Making pizza for a group tonight. Followed Vito's youtube video (apart from final quantities.. adjusting down). Made my poolish at 8:30 PM, left out til 9:30 PM, then fridged.
It is now 1PM, I checked on it and it smells yeasty, and has bubbles on top, but has not really grown in volume.
My original plan: Remove from fridge @ 4pm, let it come to temp for 45min, then mix remaining flour, water and salt to make dough. Then I'd give it an hour, ball, and let them rest for 2 hours before baking (coming to 8pm).
​
Given no rise, I've taken it out of the fridge and am attempting to let it grow a bit.
Does it make sense if I: unfridge it from now (1pm) until 4:30/5pm and proceed from making the final dough, same timeline? So make final dough @ 4:30/5pm, let it rest for 30m-1h, ball up, and let those rest for 2h before cooking?
https://imgur.com/a/m3jiJm1 IMG of poolish for reference

Many of my customers often ask me why their pizzas don't turn out as beautifully as mine, even though they're using portable propane ovens similar or identical to the ones I use for some of my catering events. However, achieving excellent results and impressing your guests is not difficult if you pay attention to some key aspects that these relatively inexpensive ovens, priced at around $500, require.
Below, I will list what you need to do to obtain a fantastic-looking pizza by following some simple rules:
• When should I turn on the oven? The oven should be turned on approximately 30 minutes before starting the baking process. During this time, it is advisable to leave the flame at the lowest setting so that the oven heats up evenly.
• What kind of peels do I need? Typically, two peels are used: a large and perforated one to insert and remove the pizza and a small and round one to turn the pizza. Beginners can use only the big one, as it is possible to turn the pizza with the large peel during cooking by taking out and rotating it with your hands and then putting the pizza inside the oven again. It will take some practice to learn how to use the small peel to turn the pizza. Note that the holes on the peel are used to remove any residue or excess flour from the pizza base. If you live in the Los Angeles area, you can contact me to arrange a private class.
• What should I check before baking pizzas? Check the temperature of the oven stone! External factors such as wind or low temperatures can prevent the oven and its stone from reaching the optimal temperature. If you don't have a laser thermometer, use the thermometer that many manufacturers often include in the oven. In the case of the Gozney Roccbox oven that I use, the thermometer is located on the left side. To ensure that the oven is at the right temperature, the needle should be positioned at least halfway or three-quarters of the way up the yellow range. If you have a laser thermometer, the temperature of the stone at the bottom of the oven should be around 750 degrees Fahrenheit or 400 Celsius.
• When should I not insert the pizza? If the oven is too hot or too cold! If the needle on your Roccbox oven is in the red zone and you insert your pizza, you will be forced to turn it after a few seconds to avoid burning it. This sudden operation performed by inexperienced hands could cause a hole in the pizza base and the leakage of the toppings, resulting in smoke and dirtying your small oven. Therefore, especially for beginners, it is recommended to avoid inserting the pizza when the oven is too hot. On the other hand, if the oven is not at the right temperature, and the needle on your Roccbox oven is in the green zone, you risk piercing the pizza as soon as you try to turn it.
• How long should I wait before turning the pizza? If you have inserted the pizza at the right oven temperature and set the flame just above the minimum, it will take about 40 seconds before turning your pizza. Pay attention to the fact that the edge of the pizza facing the flame is rising, and the edge opposite the flame is slightly drying. At that point, you can turn the pizza by 45 degrees and, when needed, repeat the operation three times, always being careful of the edge facing the flame. When the entire edge is cooked, and the underside of the pizza is slightly cooked like a leopard spot, your Neapolitan pizza will be ready to be removed and served.
• Why does the oven lose temperature? After cooking some pizzas, especially if your dough is cold, or there are adverse weather conditions, your oven will tend to lose temperature. If you continue to insert pizzas, you risk piercing them, causing the inconveniences described earlier.
• What should I do when the oven loses temperature? If you still have pizzas to cook, and the oven has lost temperature, you can turn the flame to maximum when there are no pizzas inside, bring the oven back to temperature, then lower the flame just above the minimum and resume cooking.
In conclusion, obtaining a fantastic-looking pizza with portable propane ovens is not difficult, but it requires attention to some rules. First of all, turn on the oven approximately 30 minutes before starting cooking and leave the flame at the lowest setting to allow the oven to heat up evenly. It is also essential to use the right peels, a large and perforated one for inserting and removing the pizza, and a small and round one for turning it. Additionally, it is crucial to check the temperature of the oven and the stone at the bottom before inserting the first pizza and to avoid inserting the pizza if the oven is too hot. After inserting the pizza, wait approximately 40 seconds before turning it and repeat the operation three times. Finally, if the oven loses temperature after cooking some pizzas, you can bring it back to temperature by turning the flame to maximum when there are no pizzas inside, then lower the flame just above theminimum and resume cooking. By following these simple rules, even beginners can prepare delicious and beautiful pizzas with portable propane ovens. If you need practice or further advice, you can contact an expert like me to arrange a private lesson. Ultimately, the key to achieving perfect pizzas is patience and attention to detail. Good luck and enjoy your meal!

Does anyone with a weber crafted carbon steel grill top ever use it for cooking pizza? I know there is a weber crafted pizza stone however I feel the griddle is more versatile for my use than the pizza stone. What are your thoughts? Could anyone provide insight with their experiences?

This sounds mean but I can explain. I (21F) share an apartment with Dina (19F). We also have an additional roommate (21F).
I and my other roommate love to cook and bake, and we’ve offered each other food/shared baked goods/etc. When Dina moved in we also shared with her. Dina never had anything homemade to share because she doesn’t cook and “doesn’t know how to” (her words). But, she expressed interest in learning and said she was going to begin making more food at home. I haven’t tried anything of her’s yet, but a couple weeks ago she was supposed to make dinner for me, her, and her boyfriend and we were going to hang out. Plans ended up changing last minute because Dina forgot to defrost the meat for the meal. She texted to tell me the dinner night may be postponed to tomorrow or might happen later that night. I told her either was fine and I could feed myself if we had to do it tomorrow instead.
When I got home from work that day, I saw a pack of frozen meat in a bowl in the sink. The bowl was full of water that was tinged red because the package the meat was in had a hole in it and was leaking. It was gross and unsanitary and made me uncomfortable. I asked Dina if she knew the package was open and she said it ripped when she pulled it out of the freezer. I left it be and decided I’d rain check on dinner with her and her bf. They ended up being gone and busy with friends until late, so it worked out.
What cemented my discomfort was the day after. Dina had gone on to cook the night before anyway and just ate with her bf, and then putting away the leftovers. I came home and decided to make a smoothie and go for a walk. I open the freezer to get my fruit mix, and there is the meat package, open, with half the raw meat still in it, sat on top of my fruit bag and a couple other things of mine. I wanted to vomit. I have a certificate in food safety and preparation. This is so unsanitary and dangerous, especially considering the outside of the package is contaminated due to the way she defrosted it. I put the meat in a bag and back in the freezer (if she wants it there despite food safety rules on te freezing raw product, that’s her choice), cleaned up, and tried to go about my day.
The other day Dina brought up wanting to make something for us to share. I told her I wasn’t feeling hungry for why she had in mind. She asked why I wasn’t excited about her cooking like I was last time, and eventually the truth came out that her food safety (or lack thereof) made me uncomfortable and that I would not eat anything she cooks going forward. She called me an asshole for being so critical and judge-y of her when “she doesn’t know what she’s doing and is at least trying”. I told her the way she handles food is scary, especially considering she works at a restaurant and handles/preps food. She called me a bitch and hasn’t spoken to me since. Was I the asshole here?
EDIT- for everyone insisting I offer to help her, I HAVE! When she first expressed interest in learning how to cook I offered my help and reminded her of my certification. I occasionally gave her advice about food safety when I noticed her do/mention something unsafe. She told me she didn’t need help and wanted to learn on her own. She insisted if she needed my help she would ask and that she was an adult and could do it herself. I didn’t want to step on her toes so I backed off. She said she works in a restaurant so she’s pretty sure she can “figure it out”.

I think it could be a color mismatch. It only shows up when enb effects are enabled. Here is the screenshot: https://imgur.com/a/px4EXt0
Modlist:
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"Modern Female Sitting Animations Overhaul"
"Take a Seat - New Sitting Animations for OAR or DAR"
"Feline Movement Animations for Khajiits Only (FMAK) SSE"
"Leviathan Animations II - Male Idle Walk And Run"
"Leviathan Animations II - Female Idle Walk And Run"
"Improved Table Transition Animations"
"Movement Behavior Overhaul SE"
"Smooth Moveset"
"Relaxed Sneak Animations"
"Immersive folded hands (DAR)"
"True Directional Movement - Modernized Third Person Gameplay"
"True Directional Movement - Tail Animation Fix"
"True Directional Movement - Diagonal Sprinting Fix"
"Immersive Interactions - Animated Actions"
"Dynamic Lowered Hoods"
"Better Jumping SE"
"NSFW - Frameworks and Quests_separator"
"OSA for Ostim"
"OStim NG"
"Open Animations Romance and Erotica (former OpenSex)"
"OSound"
"OSound Expansion"
"Vampire Feed Proxy"
"Devour - Vampire Feeding Animations for OStim NG"
"Excitable Subs for OStim"
"Sswaye's OAhegaoNG"
"OComfort - OStim Lovers Comfort"
"OMerchants - OStim merchants with benefits"
"OStim NPCs - NPC Sex Lives Improved"
"Smooches of Skyrim"
"That Night on the Lake"
"Fertility Mode"
"Fertility Adventures"
"Fertility Mode v3 Fixes and Tweaks"
"OCum Ascended"
"More Adventures For OStim"
"Various States of Undress (VSU) Framework"
"VSU for OStim - Enhanced Undressing"
"Pantheon - Coralyn - Bosmer Shaman - 3BA"
"Nordic UI bars for OStim"
"Drago's Enchant Those Potions Opensex Add on"
"Night-blooming Violets for OStim NG"
"OStim Lovers"
"OStim Solutions Revisited SE"
"Valerica - Lust of a Mother - Sexlab and FlowerGirl Editions"
"Valerica - Lust of a Mother OStim"
"HALOS Human HDT Tongues"
"Halos HDT Tongues for OStim NG"
"Bodyslide Presets_separator"
"My Tasteful Body - CBBE 3BA Bodyslide Preset"
"D-sney Mommy - 3BA Edition - Bodyslide Preset"
"Racemenu Presets_separator"
"Miggyluv's Presets - Ro'ari (Khajiit)"
"Sswaye's Mom NG - Highpoly Nordic Preset"
"My Saved Presets"
"Lia - HPH Racemenu Preset"
"Pride of Skyrim 13 - Androgynous Male Presets"
"Gigachad Dunmer Racemenu Preset - EFM"
"BnP - Male Presets"
"NSFW - Male_separator"
"Paramount - FPS Galore for Newrim"
"SAM Light"
"SAM Light Texture Add-on"
"SAM High Poly Conversion SE"
"XPMSSE 1.15 genital size"
"Lunar Guard Armor for SAM (Refit)"
"NSFW - Female Body_separator"
"Breton NPCs Have Elven Ears"
"Caliente's Beautiful Bodies Enhancer -CBBE-"
"CBBE 3BA"
"3BA Vanilla Clothes and Armor"
"Bruma - CBBE 3BBB Conversion with Uniboob"
"3BA Vanilla Clothes and Armor - Immersive Slider Group"
"Demoniac_Texture"
"Pregnant Normal Map 20%"
"P.A.I.A"
"NSFW - Physics_separator"
"CBPC - Physics with Collisions"
"Faster HDT-SMP"
"Faster HDT-SMP - Ultra Perfomance Config"
"CBBE SMP (3BBB)"
"MCM Recording_separator"
"MCM Recording"
"LOD_separator"
"DynDOLOD Resources SE"
"DynDOLOD Scripts"
"DynDOLOD DLL"
"ENB Helper SE"
"Lux Via"
"Lux"
"Lux Variants"
"Torches Cast Shadows SE"
"Rudy ENB Cathedral Weathers ADDONS and REQUiRED Files"
"Obsidian Weathers and Seasons"
"Performance_separator"
"SSE ReShade Helper"
"Mfg Fix"
"Tools_separator"
"Project New Reign - Nemesis Unlimited Behavior Engine"
"BodySlide and Outfit Studio"
"Outputs_separator"
"Bodyslide Output"
"OAR Output"
"Nemesis Output"
"TexGen Output"
"DynDOLOD Output"
"Landscape LOD Output"
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"Weapons Armor Clothing and Clutter Fixes"
"3BA Weapons Armor Clothing and Clutter Fixes - 3BA WACCF"
"Tavern AI fix"
"Dragonactorscript infinite loop fix"
"Flora Respawn Fix"
"Flora Respawn Fix SE for Beyond Skyrim"
"Sprint Sneak Movement Speed Fix"
"NPC AI Process Position Fix - NG"
"Face Discoloration Fix"
"Instantly Skip Dialogue NG"
"CACO - Beyond Skyrim Bruma Patch"
"RS Children Patch Compendium"
"SIC SE - Add-Ons and Patches"
"Immersive College of Winterhold Patch Collection"
"RS Children Overhaul Helgen Reborn Patch"
"MuJointFix"
"First Person Camera Height Fix"
"Unofficial Moonpath to Elsweyr Patch"
"kryptopyr's Automated Patches"
"Interesting NPCs Alternate Start Patch"
"Interesting NPCs SE - Cutting Room Floor Patch"
"Falskaar - Addons and Patches"
"RDO - iAFT SE Patch Final"
"Miscellaneous Embers XD Patches"
"Lucien - Moon and Star Patch"
"Lucien - Moonpath to Elsweyr Patch"
"Patch for RS Children Overhaul"
"Prisoner Cart Opening Fix SE and AE"
"Dual Casting Fix"
"Don't Talk With Your Mouth Full"
"Clams and Oysters Clipping Fix"
"Better Dirt Cliffs and Alphas"
"Animation Queue Fix"

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Hi everyone,
Thanks for all the amazing questions you’ve submitted for our Q&A with Assistant Game Director, Adam Whiting. We’re delighted to have received so many. So many, in fact, that we couldn’t possibly have taken so much of Adam’s time to answer them all – maybe we’ll have to do a part two one day soon.
We sat down with Adam this week and got some answers for you. We’re sure you’ll be happy with what Adam did manage to answer; he’s really gone above and beyond for this one.
Here’s a few words from Adam:

“I really appreciate all the kind words for the studio, we’ll be sure to share them with the rest of the team. It was also nice to see some familiar faces from over the years – thank you for remembering me and saying hello! It’s always a pleasure interacting with our wonderful community, and we look forward to doing more things like this in the future.”

And with that, we’ll dive into the Q&A. Enjoy!
/EVERYWHERE Community Team

Life as an Assistant Game Director at Build A Rocket Boy

Q: Hi Adam! Thank you for participating in this, it's so great to see the relationship Build A Rocket Boy has established with the community!

• What are your daily tasks as Assistant Game Director, and what would you say is the aspect of game development that you give the most importance to? (Game mechanics, narrative, visuals...)
• What are your favourite games and how do you think they influenced you when working on EVERYWHERE oand MindsEye?

Keep being awesome! – From u/NestorSite
A: Well, thanks to you as well NestorSite, it’s exciting for me to get to talk to you all about what we have been working on (finally!) and we really care about our community and are delighted to get to share more info.
As Assistant Game Director my day can vary greatly, and each day presents new challenges and opportunities to help progress the project. Primarily in Game Direction we are ensuring that all the teams are aligned on the bigger picture and goals of the project. Historically, this has been working mostly with Design on the core game mechanics and systems, but now we are at a point where a lot of the design work is complete, its more about checking progress, playing the game every day, and making sure everything is trending correctly.
It's hard to pick an area that is most important as what makes games development special is how it’s a convergence point for most of the artistic and engineering disciplines we know of, and all of them contribute to the whole, so they are all equally important (plus I would hate for any of our teams to feel like I had any favourites 😉). That being said, games are primarily meant to be fun, so I am particularly passionate about the core mechanics. We want our players to have a great time in EVERYWHERE and MindsEye – though each of these have their own specific requirements that present interesting challenges and drive all our departments to push the boundaries of their respective areas of expertise.
I’ve given a lengthy answer about my favourite games elsewhere so I’ll try and keep this short and point you in the direction of that, what I would say though is that generally we don’t look at other games in particular when working on the design of EVERYWHERE though it’s impossible not to be influenced by the things you have enjoyed (such is the nature of art).
Q: Hey Adam! Could you tell us what is the most challenging task you had to face in the last few years? – u/Gab1024
A: Hey Gab, thanks for your question!
One of the biggest challenges we’ve faced throughout the project has been building the team – building an exciting, ambitious, and new type of project is a huge challenge but building the company in tandem has been very tough as we’ve always aimed to bring the quality talent that the project requires. That can be tough when you are trying to attract talented devs, who, in many cases, can choose where they work. They are often choosing between established studios and established projects which can be very tempting. However, we’ve been very fortunate and have built a team of very talented and experienced devs (with a healthy dose of people fresh to the industry) who are really delivering on the ambitions of the project, and we are all excited for you all to see and play the game as soon as possible.
Personally, one big challenge for me was the whole Gamescom experience – I never thought I’d find myself on stage with Geoff and talking in front of so many people, especially having grown up watching countless game announcements and reveals, it was both terrifying and extremely exciting though pretty far from my natural environment behind a PC in a studio 😊
Q: Hiya, I’m curious if you started out in another role in the gaming industry that led to being a Director? - Thanks, u/voodoolady94 xx
A: Hey voodoolady – unsure if your name is a Ween or Hendrix reference but either way, I like the handle!
I started in the industry, as many people did, in Quality Assurance. QA is a fantastic starting point for two reasons; Firstly, it isn’t a role that requires a lot of specialised experience to get started. In fact, one of the key things we are always looking for with new QA roles is a passion for gaming, strong attention to detail and good communication skills – don’t get me wrong it can be very intense and challenging working in QA but if you have a genuine passion for making games it can be highly enjoyable and rewarding working in part of a team that is so intrinsic to releasing any quality project. Secondly, everything in every game needs some form of QA support – meaning that you are exposed to every department/facet of games development which can be really useful for finding what you like and what you are good at. Often you can naturally progress into a more specialised role that can lead to moving to another team entirely (or becoming a stalwart experienced QA that will always be in demand within the industry) – there are countless examples I can think of from across my career where people have gone from QA into writing, AI coding, concept art, audio design – pretty much every department has someone within it that started in QA.
My personal journey was rising through the ranks of QA to a QA Supervisor and then moving towards Production before eventually moving to Game Direction – and I’m honestly still learning and growing every day as I get to interact with truly exceptional and talented people who are each extremely knowledgeable and experienced in their own areas. Each interaction is an opportunity to learn and grow, and if you approach the industry with that spirit, you will definitely do well.
Q: How hard is it to turn your game ideas into reality with the help of developers, how do you explain to them what's on your head in terms of game direction? – Thanks, u/vassirbl. From Morocco.
A: Hey vassirbl, thanks for taking part!
This is a really interesting question and one that is hard to answer directly as it depends on the idea – some things can require just a few lines of code, some can require multiple teams working in tandem to bring it to life – and that is part of the challenge with games development, something that seems quite straight forward might be really challenging to manifest. On the flipside, sometimes something that may seem to be really complicated and taxing can actually be done very quickly and efficiently.
The thing I’d say about this is that having ideas is one thing, everyone has ideas and I believe everyone is creative, but in a position like games direction it isn’t always about throwing around big ideas – you need to have a vision for what you are wanting to make and achieve and you need to ensure that your ideas are in service of that vision and are supplementing/augmenting/enhancing the direction of the game. You aren’t always making a game for yourself and your own niche interests, you are in service of the vision and trying to ensure that there is congruence between what is going into the game and what the game is trying to achieve.
In terms of explaining things that can often be more straight forward than it might seem, you are interacting with people who aren’t just gamers, they have made gaming their passion/vocation so you are speaking about the game in a similar way to when speaking to a friend about a game you are both playing together – and generally if the idea is good then it's going to generate some excitement. Then you are in an ideation process where the person you are talking to, often someone who is passionate about an areas of games development (their discipline), will then have some suggestions for flourishes and tweaks that can help improve the idea. This is really important because you want the game to be as good as it can be, and there is no silver bullet that magically makes a game feel special, fun or unique, normally its countless little tweaks and adjustments and suggestions from everywhere within the studio that create the end result which hopefully is something that feels like it has been made with love, care and attention. You can’t fake that or even articulate what it is that makes a game feel like that, but you feel it when you play a great game and that is what we are always striving to achieve.
Q: I was waiting for this because I'm on the mailing list. I appreciate this. Hello Adam. I guess my question is what is one of your favourite things about being an Assistant Gaming Director at Build A Rocket Boy? – u/EducationalCook9570
A: Thanks for signing up, EducationalCook, really pleased to get to answer your question so thanks for taking part.
It’s really hard to pick one particular thing but over the years I’ve been asked some variation of this question and my answer generally is the same – it's getting to work with such an amazing team of wonderful and talented people who are giving their all in service of the same common goal – making EVERYWHERE and MindsEye the best possible game(s) they can be.
When I was growing up gaming was still a bit of a niche hobby so anyone I met that was a gamer was instantly a friend, someone I could share my passion with, and now I get to spend most of my time with people like that – it's truly a blessing and I feel fortunate every day I get to interact with all of my wonderful colleagues.
Q: Howdy Adam! Most people will ask about the game, but for a Q&A it's really about the person. So here are my questions.

• Were there moments where the development struggled? If so, how did this affect you?
• Now the last ones might be too personal buuuut, is pineapple on pizza justifiable?

Thx in advance for answering these questions. I really hope you do. – u/MikaStr0L
A: Hey MikaStr0L, thanks for your question(s)!
I wouldn’t say there were any parts where development struggled but along the way there are always challenges to overcome, the main one for us was building a company at the same time of building a brand new and exciting project.
Generally speaking though, if things aren’t going quite as planned I try not to let it bother me – though that can of course be hard when you feel very personally invested in something – but I’ve found that it doesn’t help to let the negative feeling linger and instead try and push on, games development – like life in general – doesn’t always go according to plan but you just have to focus on solutions and moving forward and not let things hold you back. If you can do something about an issue, then deal with it and fix it, if you can’t do anything about it then move on and try not to let the negatives/setbacks hold back progress in other areas.
Now the truly important question… I must admit that I am not a fan of pineapple on pizza, although I do like pineapple generally, I’m more of a pepperoni kind of guy 😊
Q: Hey Adam, first, let me say I admire the work you all do a lot. Not only you guys at BARB, but also in the whole industry. I'm really looking forward to getting my hands on MindsEye and EVERYWHERE.

• Working within the QA part for many years, was it difficult the transition to a different role? Would you say it was a positive change?
• Do you think EVERYWHERE and other games/experiences with a similar concept are the future of gaming?

Thank you and I hope you keep succeeding at your career, can't wait to play both projects’ you guys have been working on. 💙 – u/Fabry06
A: Hi Fabry, thanks for taking part and for your kind words and sentiments. I’ll start by saying that I also admire the work that takes place industry wide – the games industry is full of amazing and talented people who are all helping to further this artform we all whole dear forward, and I believe we are only just now realising the potential that video games can achieve.
I would say that transitioning from QA to another role felt very natural, even in my current position I’m still playing the game all the time and entering bugs, they might not be as well written as they once were but once you’ve cultivated a QA mindset it is not easy to turn off (this can make me a very boring person to watch play in my spare time as I’m always poking and prodding games to see what might happen…). I would say it was also a positive change for me personally but everyone's path in the industry is different and you kind of move with the tides and get swept up in a project and who knows where you end up within it – I always took the approach of wanting to be helpful/productive/useful in furthering the ambitions of the studio and the project and have always been happy to do that regardless of what that entails (in the very early days I was building PCs and writing design docs as well as doing QA work, whatever was required).
I do think that EVERYWHERE is a new type of project, but one that isn’t entirely unfamiliar, there are probably aspects that you recognise and some that are a bit different, I think the way everything ‘fits together’ is quite elegant and hasn’t been done before. The industry in general though is continuously evolving and I think that’s what makes it an exciting thing to be a part of. I do feel that the way people are consuming entertainment has fundamentally changed within the past decade and I believe that EVERYWHERE is a reflection of that – perhaps games in general are a bit to beholden to established paradigms and ways of doing things in ways that I think we aren’t.

About EVERYWHERE and MindsEye

Q: What is the inspiration to create EVERYWHERE and MindsEye, and why did you decide to make them two different games? – u/Zgangstas
A: Hi Zgangstas, thanks for your question.
This is a really interesting question and I think this is part of the magic of games development, when you are ideating/experimenting in the early stages of a project you can happen upon some magic that can alter the way you approach things, even if the vision has remained the same throughout perhaps the way to achieve it evolves.
I think that one of the main things we always wanted to do was create a space where players were in control, where they could be who they want to be and have the experiences that they wanted to have – but then as experienced game devs there is a natural inclination towards curating an immersive experience that captivates and enthrals players – this was a tricky thing to balance and trade off and I think ultimately it lead us to our current path.
EVERYWHERE is a space where players are in control, where they can build, share, compete, and explore in numerous different ways – and MindsEye is where we can construct an immersive and cinematic experience – with shared DNA between the two so we aren’t reinventing the wheel constantly, and we are at the place where we are now where work on one project is benefitting the other and vice versa.
So, I guess the true answer is that they both demanded to be different game organically through the course of development and we pay attention to what the game is telling us and let that guide us.
Q: Hi Adam, there’s the audience that fantasize on stylized and cartoonish games and the ones that are focused on realistic, story-driven experiences. How challenging is it to deliver the best game as possible to both audiences, and how confident do you feel about the shape those two games are in? – u/Treyboss2001
A: Thanks for your question Treyboss.
I think as you say there are probably distinct audiences for both, some that prefer or only enjoy one style or the other, but there are others (like me!) who enjoy both stylised and realistic games – often depending on my mood.
It may seem challenging to be constantly shifting gears between them both but ultimately, it’s more natural than it may seem. They have very distinctive and different requirements and demands that make decisions intuitive – though careful thought and consideration is required for each.
However, the way we think about it internally is that we get to have our cake and eat it, we aren’t locked in to one style or gameplay type, which can be fun and refreshing – perhaps you hit a creative roadblock with one and you can move on to the other and come back with a fresh perspective to the original issue you were having. Projects of this scale can often take many years to make so not being too locked in to just one thing is a blessing.
In terms of the progress we are making, I have to say that I am constantly delighted – either one project is delivering something new and wonderful or the other one is (often both at the same time!). Now we are getting to show people them both for the first time I’m truly humbled by the very positive reactions we are receiving.
Q: Hello Adam from the Build A Rocket Boy team. What was the original plan when EVERYWHERE was being developed in lumberyard engine and back when yah were using the lumberyard engine what were the challenges and roadblocks?
Keep being awesome Adam. - u/Lonelyfades
A: Thank you Lonelyfades, I will do my best!
I think back when we first started with this project the industry was quite different, the game engine landscape in particular was very different. We always had lofty ambitions for this project and at the time Lumberyard seemed to be the only engine that could deliver what we needed to even scratch the surface of what we wanted to accomplish. Since then, things have progressed somewhat and now we are in UE5. I believe UE5 is clearly the cutting-edge technology that we need in order to deliver the best possible results.
That is the strange thing with life and games development, sometimes an old decision was the correct one at the time even if it is not correct for right now, and even things as disruptive as engine swapping is ultimately worth it if it unlocks the creative potential you are aspiring towards.
I think this is ultimately a tribute to our core strength as a developer which is our unwillingness to compromise, we are eager to undertake difficult or even painful changes if it helps move the needle closer to where we want it to be.
Q: Hi Adam, so something I was confused about, is EVERYWHERE and MindsEye the same game? Or is it a game within a game? – u/Jozza141
A: Jozza thanks for asking your question and I am happy to try and relieve your confusion.
EVERYWHERE and MindsEye are distinctly different, but also inextricably linked. One way to think about it is that EVERYWHERE is ultimately a platform for games, entertainment, and different types of fun – and MindsEye is a story-driven, action-adventure game that could reasonably exist on its own but is enriched and elevated by its connection to a larger social space. A connection that I believe is deep and meaningful. The possibilities are endless and there’s so much to share, but we will reveal more when we are ready.
Q: Both u/iPeluche and u/Bobby_Boy301 had some questions about PC vs Console release. Why has BARB opted for the separate release between PC and Console. And does this mean Console won’t get the same treatment as PC after release?
A: I don’t think we are completely locked into this type of approach; we want to do that which makes the most sense for both projects whilst also working within the constraints of their paradigms.
PC is certainly a very open and creatively liberating space in which to operate, sometimes key innovations in gaming take place on PC because of its open nature and I think this is an example of that.
Rest assured we are passionate about both PC and Console development, and we would always aim to ensure parity between both releases of either project – platform holders permitting.
With all that being said, I would look forward to future announcements as we are very pragmatic as a company and always move forward in a direction that makes sense both for us and for our players.

Advice for aspiring Game Developers

Q: Ok, ok, here goes:
What advice do you have for those aspiring to pursue a career in game development?
What excites you the most in terms of future game development and where do you think the industry is headed? – u/RazorDarkness
A: Thanks for your question RazorDarkness.
My biggest advice for anyone trying to pursue a career in games development is to always remain humble, this is the cross section for all the artistic and engineering disciplines we have in media, as such it is impossible to be an expert at all things. You are always going to be working in a team and you are always going to be relying on your peers to achieve whatever it is you set out to achieve. So always keep your eyes and ears open and try to absorb as much knowledge and information as you can so you never stop learning. The moment you think you know it all is the moment you become a dinosaur and you will be immediately surpassed.
My second big piece of advice is to never lose sight of why you are making games in the first place – I often keep some mementos on my desk from favourite games and things that inspired me as a child to keep me grounded, as even on the hardest of days I can take a step back and realise that I’m getting to do something that I’ve loved my entire life and despite its difficulties my overriding feeling is always gratitude that I’m even able to earn a living doing something I love.
Q: Hello Adam!
First, I really hope you and your team are getting enough sleep after all the hard work you guys put into these projects. I just want to say on behalf of the EVERYWHERE & MindsEye Community, we really appreciate all of you that are involved with these two major projects, and also sending much support to every single one of you on this journey!
But my question is ... Where do you see yourself, the team, and everyone over at BARB in the next 10 years after both games are officially out? – u/TheRealRocketBoy
A: Well thank you TheRealRocketBoy – your support and encouragement means a lot, excited for you to get to enjoy the fruits of our labours!
This is a great question – I see us still working on this project, both aspects of what we are doing have far reaching plans and if all they all work out, we’ll still be working on both – and we aim that this will be in tandem with our community and players.
What things will look like at that point though I have no idea, EVERYWHERE in particular isn’t the kind of game we want to prescribe to people, it's something we want to further improve and refine in collaboration with our players – indeed the launch of EVERYWHERE will truly just be the beginning and I know that the creativity of gamers will always thrill and surprise so I think we are going to go on a wild ride together and I can’t wait to see where we end up.
MindsEye on the other hand… well who knows where in space or time we may be with that story by that point… I could write down on a piece of paper now a phrase for where MindsEye will be in year 10 and whilst it would almost certainly hold true, how we get there, and the specifics would surprise even me, I’m sure!
Q: Hey Adam, appreciate you taking the time to do this Q&A!
You have a great name! I may have a bias though as I'm also an Adam. In my spare time I've been creating a game design document for a game I'd love to create. This document has been growing and expanding over the past couple years. Ideally, I have aspirations of becoming a creative director for a development studio but have no experience working in the gaming industry (I'm a project manager in the residential construction industry).
Given your experience in the industry and your current position as BARB's Assistant Game Director, what advice would you give someone such as myself about how I may go about potentially pitching my design documentation to a studio and ultimately becoming a creative director? Do you personally feel as though people aspiring to become involved in the gaming industry need to start in an entry level position? Or perhaps there are alternative pathways to achieving such goals?
Thank you! Well wishes to you and everyone at BARB! – u/EndgameEmporium
A: Hey EndgameEmporium!
I admire your enthusiasm and you clearly have a passion for games which is something you want to hold on to as it will always keep you right and steer you correctly.
That being said I think there are two ways to head in if you want to be a creative director – firstly you can go down the studio route – however keep in mind that games are big expensive things to make, and it would be pretty remarkable for someone to have an idea so strong that a studio would trust in and fund it. Generally speaking I think going down this path would require you joining a studio and working your way up, and in particular showing a willingness to work towards someone else’s vision and showing that you can see the big picture when it comes to games development, then you will get creative opportunities with an established project or studio to show what you can do and from there more and more creative freedom until you are able to pitch your idea. With that path you may very well find that working with other creative brief’s and visions can be both challenging and rewarding, as essentially they are ‘creative restraints’ you are operating within and learning to work within these restraints will teach you how to be economical and efficient with your designs and ideas (sometimes a good idea can cost millions of dollars and sometimes a great idea can be brought to life with existing resources, the latter is where the magic really is, and will make you very popular to work with!).
The second path to take would be to try and build out a vertical slice or gameplay prototype or concept yourself, with that I would try and refine your idea to its core components, understand what things fundamentally you need for another person to be able to experience or understand your idea, and go from there. If anything, EVERYWHERE might be the perfect thing for you as empowering the great creative minds of the next generation is something we are very passionate about and you may be able to bring your idea to life with ARC-ADIA.

Emerging Technologies in Gaming

Q: u/Main-Department9806 and u/Dirty_Worka had some interesting questions about AI. Adam, as AI learning and functionality accelerates, what’s your read on the level of disruption we should expect with regards to game development? And do you think we can leverage AI such as ChatGPT into games, for example, so that NPC’s dialogue could be vast and ever changing?
A: I think that AI is going to fundamentally change the way in which we interact with the world and each other, it's going to be a transformative technology over the coming years and every industry and sector will feel it.
In terms of game development, we can see how this might play out already, things like ChatGPT etc. will streamline and accelerate the game development process exponentially – this should hopefully lower the costs and requirements for making larger projects. This could mean many more larger and ambitious games that are taking more risks emerge as they won’t be as expensive and time consuming to create – instead of a lot of talent being funnelled in to a few large studios and creators it will allow us to go back to an older style of games development where a small team with a big idea has some chance of bringing it to fruition without having to compromise on the scope/scale.
From the consumer perspective yes, I think we will soon have realistic interactions with NPCs where we can really build deeper and more personal connections with the characters we interact with in these virtual worlds, possibly even allowing us to alter how events and stories may play out, maybe in the future the way I play a story driven game may yield entirely different results and a different ending to how your story may finish – and maybe these aren’t just branching paths but completely different forks in the road we are creating dynamically – maybe then watching each other player story games has value beyond the personality/skill of the person playing.
I think this something that games developers have always wanted to have access to, a future where we can create entire worlds that feel unique to the individual because the way you are experiencing it is unique to you, in the same way that each of our journeys through life are unique and different even though we all inhabit the same world within the same physical universe.

Off-Topic

Q: Hey Adam, first I would like to thank you and the team for the great effort on EVERYWHERE and we can't wait to play what you're working on.
Second, my question is what's your favourite game (or games) of all time (excluding games you worked on). - u/Punisher_27
A: Firstly, thank you for your kind words, Punisher!
Secondly, what a fun question! I’m going to end up kicking myself later when I realise I missed something but here are a few of my faves from a lifetime spent playing video games:
Mario 64 – it is tough picking one Mario game as he’s the reason I got in to games (playing on my parents imported NES at the age of 3 changed my life!) but something about Mario 64 is just so magical and wonderful, the first time effortlessly moving through a 3D world, the joyous nature of the gameplay and the level design, I just adored this so much and despite later entries (e.g. Galaxy) being more refined and objectively better this is just such a special game I don’t think it's possible to calculate the impact it had on the industry and on entertainment when it first came out.
Quake 3 – I have probably played this more than any other game (with the possible exception of World of Warcraft) but this was my first foray in to the world of online games and that was a life-changing moment, realising that no matter how good I got there was always someone out there better… well that was a challenge I duly accepted and I have met many wonderful friends I hold very dear to me along the way across many different online games but this was the one that really blew me away
Bloodborne – I do adore the whole Soulsborne franchise(s) and as a game dev I really admire how FromSoft do things their own way and stay true to their artistic vision. I can’t think of a game that is more harmonious and congruent than Bloodborne, every pixel/sound is working in perfect harmony with each other, and the end result is something truly staggering. If I could wipe my memory and play one game over and over again and recapture the same feeling I had when I first played it, it would be Bloodborne.
Final Fantasy VII – I was queueing outside Electronics Boutique the day this came out, the first FF game to get released in Europe and I’m so glad we didn’t miss out on this one (though 6 was great and we had to import that…) – I can’t put into words what it was like encountering Sephiroth for the first time thinking I was at the Shinra HQ to complete the game and then the world map opens up and my mind was so utterly blown I couldn’t believe my eyes. As for Aerith/Aeris – well… aside from the fact she was the group healer… I was just floored; I didn’t realise how potent games were at eliciting an emotional response until that scene and I doubt any game could ever have that impact again.
Street Fighter 2 – when this first came out it was unlike anything I’d ever seen before – encountering at an arcade machine it's what the “cool older kids” were playing and its always retained that allure, this was a game that was cool and badass. The way you compete against others in fighting games has a certain purity to it that I just love, and I sorely miss having arcades to go to as they were a staple in my life growing up and there was always a great fighting game a community would build around. Getting to have the SNES version that was as close to arcade perfect as we could fathom at the time was a real joy as well and I guess this is widely regarded as the beat ‘em up that started it all and with good reason, because it did!
Q: Hey Adam and the community team, hope you're all doing well!

• Are you a cat or a dog person? xD
• When the game was announced in 2017, Everywhere was only the working title of the game. Why did you keep the name? What were some of the suggestions?

Thanks in advance! – u/thewhitewolf35
A: Hey thewhitewolf! Thanks for your fun questions 😊
I am definitely a dog person, I’ve grown up with dogs my entire life and despite being fond of cats I just adore dogs – quite a few people in the office have them and I am always happy to meet them, and due to my lifestyle I am not really able to be a good and responsible dog owner right now so I am very grateful when I get to interact with any of the BARB doggos. 😊
EVERYWHERE has always been called such and I think we liked the title straight away, I think it speaks to the potentially unlimited nature of what we are trying to achieve and we want this to be a game that anyone can play, wherever they are as I think we see games as more than just ways to spend your time, they are ways to connect and socialise and learn from each other – but even more than that they are a way to share experiences and that spirit of creativity has always been our guiding star with the project.
Q: u/MightyMax_1988 would like to know more about what you do in your free time. Do you like retro consoles such as Sega Master System, Sega Genesis (mega drive), Super Nintendo (snes)? And do you like the movie Ready Player One?
A: Hey MightyMax! I am always happy to talk about my hobbies 😊my friends often wish I would shut up about them!
In my free time I do enjoy watching team sports, specifically football (lifelong Nottingham Forest fan) and I adore the NBA (big Lakers fan) and live sports are a good way to stay connected to my friends and are something I always try and make time for. I also try and stay on top of the latest greatest TV Shows, Movies and Anime (just finished Ted Lasso which I thought was such wholesome fun and I also recently finished an anime called Chainsaw Man that was just… exhilarating!).
In terms of games I’m a lifelong gamer so I’ve had every console (apart from the NeoGeo…) over the years (even a VirtualBoy), though I would say that I don’t really do much retro gaming these days as I struggle to keep up with all the modern games coming out, and I think I prioritise online gaming as it helps me stay connected to my friends so I’m always playing something with them and then trying my best to play the cream of the crop of single player games (currently trying to finish off Octopath Traveller 2 so I can move on to the new Zelda!).
And yeah, I liked both the book and the movie Ready Player One – I love a good mashup of different IPs and art-styles, I really enjoyed Wreck It Ralph for the same reason, and anything with lots of pop culture references makes me happy (even stuff like Scott Pilgrim etc.).
Q: How bad were you at Quake? – u/tyj
A: I was so terrible I had to go to tournaments and captain the UK RA3 team… it was a tough time 😊 but back then when I told people I thought Esports would be played in stadiums for millions of dollars people thought I was an idiot… I’m so delighted to see how things have ended up and really excited that future generations can actually become pro gamers as a viable path in life – how far we’ve come!
Q: Also, what’s your favourite colour? – u/voodoolady94
A: Another question from the voodoolady…. Well, this one is an easy one and I can be uncharacteristically succinct.
Pink, my favourite colour is pink 😊

So I got a pizza stone insert accessory for my propane grill and have been making a lot of pizzas recently. I've been using pizza dough from the grocery store (similar to this, but a different brand). For sauce I've been using a can or jar of store bought sauce. Toppings have been just shredded mozzarella cheese, pepperoni, black olives, pineapple, and torn up mozzarella balls.
We heat up the stone on the grill for about 20 minutes while we assemble the pizza. Then I transfer the pizza to the grill and cook for about 10 minutes. The bottom of the pizza comes out perfectly. Everything is great except that the center of the pizza is absolutely SWIMMING in water. Like, a lot of it. I've been opening the grill about 3 minutes before it's done to mop up the water with a paper towel before letting it finish cooking. It still tastes great, but I'm wondering what I'm doing wrong to make so much water on it. After the first pizza we started drying off all the ingredients with paper towels before assembling, but that doesn't seem to be helping much.
Anyone have any suggestions/advice?

So I got a pizza stone insert accessory for my propane grill and have been making a lot of pizzas recently. I've been using pizza dough from the grocery store (similar to this, but a different brand). For sauce I've been using a can or jar of store bought sauce. Toppings have been just shredded mozzarella cheese, pepperoni, black olives, pineapple, and torn up mozzarella balls.
We heat up the stone on the grill for about 20 minutes while we assemble the pizza. Then I transfer the pizza to the grill and cook for about 10 minutes. The bottom of the pizza comes out perfectly. Everything is great except that the center of the pizza is absolutely SWIMMING in water. Like, a lot of it. I've been opening the grill about 3 minutes before it's done to mop up the water with a paper towel before letting it finish cooking. It still tastes great, but I'm wondering what I'm doing wrong to make so much water on it. After the first pizza we started drying off all the ingredients with paper towels before assembling, but that doesn't seem to be helping much.
Anyone have any suggestions/advice?

Along the same lines as the foods you crave that don't exist anymore post...
What foods (homemade or storebought) do you strongly associate with your childhood visits with grandparents?
For me:
Paternal grandparents: Ho-Hos, Doo-Dads, Fig Newtons, cereal with Half and Half, homemade apple pie, crown roast of pork with sauerkraut and black-eyed peas for New Year's Day, shrimp cocktail, Mandarin orange jello salad, Chicken Divan, Filet Mignon on the grill (my paternal gpa was a complete jerk, but the man could grill a perfect steak)
Maternal grandparents: Pepperidge Farm sugar cookies, Keebler Grasshopper cookies, potato sticks in a can, Saltines in the old-fashioned metal tin, Push-Ups, Morton's frozen mini-donuts, homemade candied pecans, cream candy, poached eggs, green beans cooked in beef broth, fresh-picked tomatoes, butterscotch hard candy, Thanksgiving dinner, and my absolute favorite - turkey vegetable soup 2 days after Thanksgiving, made from the carcass. I would lay down $100 right this minute to have a bowl of it. Nectar of the gods.

Editor’s Choice: Oster Blender Smoothie Cup and Food Processor
"Featuring incredible pitcher capacity of 64 ounces, 1200W of power, and six speed settings this is a real blending pro on your kitchen countertop."
Biggest Servings: Ninja Mega Kitchen System
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All-In-One Appliance: Hamilton Beach Wave Crusher Blender 58161
"This blender food processor that comes with a smart reversible shredding and slicing disc will easily fit even into a small kitchen."
Most User-Friendly: Ninja Foodi Cold & Hot Cook
"The 1400 W motor is powerful enough to handle traditional functions such as ice crushing, ice cream making, and frozen drinks blending. You can also use it to puree vegetables and fruits for smoothie making."
Apartment-Friendly: Ninja QB900B
"The most budget-friendly option which is still good at dicing, chopping, mincing, and pureeing vegetables and fruits."
Tech Savvy: Ninja BL700
"Witch a bunch of accessories included this model not only makes smoothies and sauces, but also will come in handy for making delicious cookie dough."
Bundget Pick: Cuisinart BFP-703BC
"Reliable option with a three-year limited backup and six speed settings to make your food taste perfect."

Editor’s Choice: Kamado Joe BJ-PS24
"Ceramic pizza stone that can be used with grill and oven, it fits for pizzas up to 20 inches in diameter."
Premium Pick: Crafted Glazed Baking Stone
"Square-shaped pizza stone made from cordierite material with a glazed finish."
Best Value: Char-Griller 6211 Smokin' Stone Jr
"Pizza stone made of cordierite, it fits for most grills and is a very affordable piece."
Best Pizza Stone for Grill: Love This Kitchen the Ultimate Pizza Stone for Oven & Grill
"Round pizza stone with 16-inch diameter, it can be used in ovens and grills, has a no-spill stopper."
Best Weber Pizza Stone: Weber Gourmet BBQ System Pizza Stone
"Cordierite 2-inch thick pizza stone with moisture absorbing carry rack and convenient handles."
Best Pizza Stone for Oven: Pizzacraft PC9899
"Square pizza stone made of thermion, it withstands 900 degree Fahrenheit heat and can be used with grills and in ovens."
Best Ceramic Pizza Stone: PIT BOSS 70137
"Ceramic 15-inch pizza stone with stopper handles, it is lightweight and 0.8 inches thick."
Best Rectangle Pizza Stone: Vital VGL1000-01 Volcano Stone Cooking Tile
"Volcano pizza stone that can be used on a stovetop, it is 0.8 inches thick."