Hi friends, does anyone know if I need some day laborers for a couple hours of basic yard work, do I just pull up to any Lowe’s/Home depot? Or is it specific stores/days/times people looking for work hangout at? I’ve never done it before. My Spanish is pretty good and I normally do everything myself but I recently hurt my back and it’s absolutely killing me. Don’t want it to affect my day job so looking for some help.
Mainly just sweeping, pulling a few weeds and trimming some low trees. Maybe picking up some dog poop out of the rocks if they will do that lol. Was planning on getting waters and pizza or something for the gang, maybe beers when it’s done.
What’s a fair wage to pay? Not sure how long it’ll take but don’t imagine it’ll take more than 3 hours, my yard is small. I know they are looking for work and want to pay them fairly. Do I need to provide gloves or will they have them? Sorry if these are stupid questions lol.

Hi all.
You may have already heard of this, but there is a planned Reddit "blackout" protest starting on June 12 and ending on June 14. We 3 mods have discussed, and we feel it is important enough that this subreddit will be participating as well.
Reddit will be either blocking or charging too much for 3rd party apps that people use to access Reddit starting July 1st. Normally, I'd say "yeah, it is their platform" but then I learned that a good number of these apps are either (a) used by mods of massive subreddits to moderate from their phones, permanently block or monitor for racist, sexist, vile posts, etc. or (b) used by people with disabilities who wouldn't otherwise be able to access Reddit.
In particular blind or vision impaired people, as Reddit doesn't have ADA accommodations for them. You can find blind subreddit's post about this here. The mods there clarify the importance of this issue more than I ever could. The comments are also enlightening. There is also an article about it (and how similar protests have worked in the past) here. As an auntie of two with vision issues who do use apps on their tablets, phones, etc. to access materials and participate online, that one hits close to home (I don't know if they are on Reddit... I don't need them finding me!)
So, as much as it pains me since I use Reddit every day, we'll be going dark in solidarity with the people this effects so greatly. It means a delay in Discussion posts re: Below Deck Sailing Yacht, and (I think) at least one Housewife show. We will be able to return to those topics once the blackout is over.
If you are moved to do so, I can find links to what we can do as individuals to express to the higher ups how much we disagree with this move.
Now I just have to figure out how to temporarily shut down the sub on those dates!

Installing parquet wood flooring in your home may provide a sense of beauty and timelessness. Parquet flooring is made up of tiny wood pieces that are placed in geometric patterns to provide an eye-catching aesthetic impression. Here's a step-by-step guide on installing parquet flooring:
Materials you will need:

1. Parquet flooring tiles
2. Adhesive (check the manufacturer's recommendations)
3. Notched trowel
4. Flooring nails or staples (if required)
5. Pry bar
6. Hammer
7. Measuring tape
8. Chalk line
9. Saw (circular or jigsaw)
10. Wood filler
11. Sandpaper
12. Finishing nails
13. Floor sander (optional)
14. Polyurethane sealant
15. Paintbrush

Step 1: Prepare the subfloor Ensure that the subfloor is clean, dry, and level. Remove any existing flooring, baseboards, and trim. Use a pry bar to remove any nails or staples. Repair any damaged areas on the subfloor and fill any gaps or holes with wood filler. Sand the subfloor if necessary to ensure a smooth surface.
Step 2: Acclimate the parquet flooring Allow the parquet flooring tiles to acclimate to the room's temperature and humidity for at least 48 hours. This helps prevent warping or buckling after installation.
Step 3: Plan the layout Decide on the pattern and layout of the parquet flooring. Use a measuring tape, chalk line, and a square to create guidelines on the subfloor. Start from the center of the room and work your way outwards. Ensure that the guidelines are perpendicular and square to the walls.
Step 4: Install the parquet flooring tiles Begin installing the parquet tiles along the chalk lines, pressing them firmly into the adhesive. Use a rubber mallet or a scrap piece of wood and a hammer to gently tap the tiles into place, ensuring a tight fit. Continue installing the tiles, working from the center towards the edges of the room.

Hubby and I ordered a basic washing machine and spent $100 more than the same washing machine was on sale at Home Depot for. I talked up the free QUICK delivery and free install and Hubby agreed to go with Costco. Our town picks up old appliances for free so that was awash. Our washer ended up arriving 2 weeks late and the installers couldn't tell me what "inlet hoses" were when I asked. (I literally didn't know, as I know zero about appliances but I learned quickly when they handed me a plastic bag labeled "inlet hoses.") Then they said the couldn't install our washer because we had hard water so they left it in our garage and that was that. I am so frustrated. After many youtube videos we still can't get the old hoses off and have had to hire a plumber to come help next week. I wish I would have bought from Home Depot. The wait would have been the same and I wouldn't have overpaid for install when they didn't help at all.

So, I've thought about this idea about bringing Vecna as the end-all big bad for a while and have hinted about it to my players out of game. "When you eventually make your way back home, life won't be the same as when you left" type of thing. I got the Rise and Fall of Vecna and the Doomed Forgotten Realms off DMGuild with the Vecna dossier from DnDbeyond, and probably going to modify it a bit if I decide to go through with it.
I have this idea that Tasha/Iggwilv has been kind of keeping a not at full strength Vecna at bay from entering her realm, but the hags have taken Prismeer for Baba Yaga. So now Vecna has made it to the Forgotten Realms, gained enough power to be cause hell, and our heros weren't there to save the day. It's an idea that hasn't really formed completly and I am not really sure how I should reveal it at the end of the campaign when we get there. They currently just beheaded Bavlorna (I have another plan with that) and are probably going to head to Thither to kill Nightshade in the next session or two.
We plan to switch DMs to my wife and play Curse of Strahd after we are done with WBtW so I'm not even sure if I should make this the end game. We've discussed about what they all want to do with their characters once we reach the end but it's still to early to tell.
My forever DM is one of my players and I'm a relatively new DM running the longest game with only DMing a different online game that fell apart several sessions in. And my wife is one of the players. Anyway, just wanted to talk a bit about my current game since I don't really have anyone to talk and flesh out ideas with.
Also, anyone have any ideas how to make the hags more threatening? Through a deck of Daddy Things, my players are at level 5. I should've been more conservative with the leveling but too late now.

for those of you who use hardiebacker board to wedge, do you do anything to the board after purchasing? wipe down or anything to prepare the board?
i went to home depot to purchase & im nervous to commit to it because it has a weird texture, almost dusty feeling- it’s not smooth like i thought it’d be?

Hey everyone! I am new to the Reptile community and currently I have a few ball pythons. I recently learned that their tanks are far too small for them and so I’m planning on building them four by twos as soon as I am out of my small apartment in just a couple months. have any of you built your own tanks before? any tips or tricks or things you wish you knew? Also, what kind of wood should I use for it? I don’t know if there are any woods that I would get a Lowe’s or Home Depot that are toxic to snakes. I was planning on just using plywood or PVC board. I’ve watched probably 15 or 20 different tutorials and I’ve watched each of them multiple times, so I feel like I have a good idea of the construction part of it, I just don’t know exactly what materials I should use. If anyone has any insights or wisdom, please let me know!

My steam deck 512gb was supposed to arrive on Monday but was rerouted the morning it was supposed to be delivered to the wrong address. UPS said the shipper was responsible for the address change.
I provided the correct address when I made my order on Steam, and I put in an inquiry about the delivery exception 2 days before delivery and re-confirmed my correct address, and Valve said not to worry about it. Now Valve is saying it wasn't their fault, refused to do anything further and closed my support ticket. I'm livid.
I am not sure what to do. I'm gonna try a few things tomorrow. I opened a new support ticket today and asked Valve to look into it again because UPS said it was Valve's fault (or possibly an intermediary company Valve seems to be using called CEVA Logistics which I also opened a claim with.) UPS will not even allow me to open a claim because they said the shipper had restricted claims on this shipment, whatever the hell that means.
I am sending a snail mail to the address it got shipped to, it's in my city and I could go pick it up when I get back from a work trip I'm on if the people there aren't assholes. And I think I am going to notify my credit card company I might need to try contesting the charge if none of these other options pan out.
I was hoping for a chill Friday with my new steam deck when I got home instead of this nightmare, happy birthday to me!
Any advice? Has anyone else heard of any other issues like this or know of any recourse?

So I signed for hiring event for substitute teacher position where they supposedly hire candidate on the spot? I am kinda nervous about the interview since I am bad at public speaking especially for group interview. I do have experience working as a student assistant/tutor for Math and CS department but I not sure if that would be sufficient enough to become successful candidate for substitute teacher? I also have customer service experience from jobs like Home Depot, Target, and Primark.
I am currently working at Primark, but I feel embarrassed when my friends with Education, and Engineering degree consistently hops onto store and ask why I am working at clothing stores, but not in relevant jobs like teaching, and even full time Engineering degree provided that I have Bachelors degree in Engineering, and have experience working as an student assistant for Math/CS department? For that reason I want to work at substitute teaching position which not only open up opportunities for full time teaching position, but would also open up my opportunities to work in Engineering and Technology department.
For this job interview do I need extensive amount of preparation for to get substitute teacher job successfully? I know they will tell 'you're hired' on the spot only if the candidate is successfully qualified, but would they tell me I am rejected after interview if they think I did not meet any requirement or possibly failed the interview?
[Note: Please respond to my post and provide me answer on the comment based of the questions I asked in this post]

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Below Numiind:

Jax looked over the tattered, gaunt, haunted group of about two thousand civilians as they huddled together in the damp cavern below the ground. A generation was missing among them. The elderly and even the aged held and cradled the pups and the infants. There were fifty new pups in the press, fifty pups who… fifty pups who had plastic tags through their ears like wildlife, and some had thick welts raised beneath their fur. Jax tried not to think about that too much. If he thought about that too much, he might just go topside and get in the RNI's way.
The cavern shook, and some pebbles broke off of the roof. Jax didn't worry to much over it, since Kai and Mei had said that the cave could stand up to a decent sized bomb. It was probably the drop pods landing. He'd never been able to be as nonchalant as the Terrans seemed to be about it, but at least he never refused a drop. Not for the first time, he bitterly wished he had his armor. Sure, most guys don't buy their service armor, but he could have afforded it. He just could conceive he'd ever need it in his life after service. More fool him.
Rae came up behind him and put a hand on his shoulder, but when he went to shrug it away, she squeezed it tighter. "What's the matter? Who needs help?"
"You do."
"I'm fine."
"You're not. Jax, you're… Jax I…"
"I said I'm fine!" he snapped as he jerked his shoulder away, but when she made a sound of shock and pain, his head snapped around, and he looked in terror for the injury he had caused her. He saw only the anguish on her face. "I'm sorry. I'm okay. I'll be okay, please don't worry."
"Ash talks about it."
"Ash won't talk about anything."
"He used to be a thief." That surprised Jax so much that he couldn't make a sound from his slack jawed maw, so she continued, "Not for a while, but he's not proud of his past. He had turned his life around, got hired in construction. Got married, and she was pregnant. Full six litter."
"Was…"
"Yes, she was. She died when the hospital got hit."
"Why are you telling me this?" Jax asked as he fought the swell of pity before it could show on his face.
"Because Ash is worried about you too."
"Ash?"
"He's more observant. There's a reason you send him to scout."
"Too?"
"Yes, Jax. He's worried too. Him and me. Kai is to worried about making sure he knows how everyone will evacuate if they need to. Mei just wants to kill another bloodskin. But Ash and I can see it."
Jax slapped the stone with his tail and griped his rifle hard. He unclenched his jaw and said, "I shouldn't have let so many buy us time on the first day. I should have brought more down here. I could have-"
"How? Knock them out and drag them all down here under fire?"
"I don't know! I should have- somehow. I'm a veteran, I served with the Terrans in antipiracy patrols and saw three combat drops. I should be able to do more."
"You want to be up there."
"Yes! But even without my armor, I'd be a liabilty," he spat.
"You just said you've fought with the Terrans before," she prodded.
"You don't understand. Those aren't just Terrans, those are RNI Drop Troopers, Lost Boys Rapid Response Division. The training the Republic put me through for regular grunt standards makes our military training look like a pup's park. The Lost Boys make the RNI Drop Troopers look like pups playing in their father's fishing box. These are the guys who read My Side and instead of feeling sorry for Sneaky, felt that he did the necessary thing and wanted to be that brave. If all of us were trained, and all of us had armor, we could support, but it's not. If any of us went up there, best case we only get ourselves hurt. Worst case we get one of them killed to protect us, because they will. They won't even think about it. Just one, one Lost Boy, made all the difference back there. Do you think we'd have gotten in without him covering us from that bird's perch of his? I know you'd be hurt at least. I have fifty-one reasons to thank him."
"Oh…" she muttered. "Look at everyone still alive. Still free. The pups told me why they were beaten."
"Why's that?" Jax asked as a stone formed in his belly.
"Their parents disobeyed."
It took Jax a full ten seconds to pull back the snarl of pure hatful rage off of his face to be replaced with a milder expression of fury, "Genocidal, and slavers. Thank the Ancestors for the Lost Boys."
"Thank the Ancestors for you, Jax. For you and the men like you in the other towns, out in the hills, in the atolls. We'd have never held out this long."
"I'm fine. I'll be okay, you don't have to worry," Jax said with a transparent smile over his face.

In High orbit above Numiid:

Acolyte-Lord Narrex-Quinn gritted his teeth. He could hardly believe that four ships, mighty battleships though they may be, could have put him on such shifting sands. His own battleship was currently bombarding the nearest of the four Terran battleships with all of its plasma batteries.
"Acolyte-Lord, their shields do show signs of stress."
"Acolyte-Lord," another Initiate-Highborn began, "Our batteries do overheat, we must cease firing for cooling!"
"Make it so, launch missiles to keep the pressure up."
"I obey, Acolyte-Lord!"
"Cruiser five, move up and open fire upon that battleship," Acolyte-Lord Narrex-Quinn commanded over the communications network.
He watched as a single battleship suppressed the whole of his fleet, and the other three sped toward the planet. "All frigates, focus fire on that battleship!" he commanded, seizing the opportunity. The missiles crept toward the Terran battleship as the frigates maneuvered to bring their plasma lances to bear on the massive vessel. For all that, Acolyte-Lord Narrex-Quinn was denied the sight of the Terran shields finally buckling. "Acolyte-lord, if they can sustain that fire for another five seconds, our lances can be brought to bear, and finally overwhelm the Terran shields," an Initiate-Highborn announced.
"How fare the extraction ships?"
"Acolyte-Lord, they need only another thirty seconds to make minimum jump distance."
"Frigates, do not lessen your fire, we shall make them pay a price in blood for this system!" Acolyte-Lord Narrex-Quinn roared. Proximity alarms suddenly sounded, "What comes?"
"Acolyte-Lord, brace for impact! Our shields do fail!"
"Slingshot trajectory," he cursed.
One of the frigates broke apart under the Terran battleship's terrible power, and Acolyte-Lord Narrex-Quinn's lances came online. The gunnery officer did not wait for the order to fire, and the Terran shields finally failed, and hot plasma splashed across its hull. Acolyte-Lord Narrex-Quinn let a cruel grin spread across his face in anticipation of seeing the Terran vessel scorched into so much twisted and useless metal, but instead two of his cruisers and yet another frigate broke apart. "KEEP FIRING!"
"Acolyte-Lord," said his security officer, "We have been boarded!"
"HOW?! THEIR SHIP IS NOWHERE NEAR US!"

Above the ruins of a mining town:

Corporal Linus George hurtled toward the ground in his drop pod watching the last video communication that his brother had sent him. "So anyway, I don't know if we'll have coms capability once we're in Clans space, since something's fucked out there," Robbie was saying, "So you might not be able to get ahold of me for a spell. Don't worry, the We Sing is a good ship. She'll get us home. Huh? Sorry Linus, just because I'm an officer doesn't mean I get to hog up the phone. Keep the faith, see you when I see you."
Linus let the pain well up in him. He let the tears run down his cheeks, and he let it turn to cold fury before he hit the ground. His armored pod's grav bubble and inertial transferal systems had insulated him from the kinetic force of the impact. Not so much the armored vehicle he had been steering for. The charges placed at the seams of his pod hatch went off, sending said hatch through the surviving driver. He keyed his mic and said, "Alpha blue leader, boots down, team check in."
"Blue one, boots down, checking in," said Private First Class Andrew Lewis.
"Blue two, boots down, checking in," said Private First Class Joshua Clark.
"Blue three, boots down, checking in," said Private First Class Benjamin carter.
"Alpha Blue, all present and accounted for, Sarge."
"Good news, Corporal. Not that they had much that could have picked one of us out on the way," came Sergeant Thomas Mitchell's growl over the tacnet. Our area of operation is civvy clear, say again our area of operation is civvy clear."
"Requesting permission to switch to heavy ordo, sarge."
"Request logged. Sir, a fire team is requesting heavy ordo."
Lieutenant Mark Thomson answered in his dulcet tones not dissimilar to being raked over broken glass, "Granted. Heavy ordo clear for all teams operating in confirmed civilian clear zones. Keep your eyes peeled for stays though, got it?"
"Aye, sir," answered the entire chain of command.
"Nobody go hunting medals, we're out to get these cultists to get less eager to die," the gunny barked over the tacnet.
Linus was already swapping out his standard ammunition block for light armor penetrating explosive rounds. "Aye, gunny. No medals." In Linus's peripheral vision, a bird's eye view of his area of operation showed an infantry squad and a tank approaching him, a platoon of infantry approaching PFC Clark, and what looked like a group of armored troop carriers approaching PFC Lewis. "Blue three, find yourself a perch and provide support for Blue Two. Blue One, see that?"
"Aye, Blue Leader. I won't see it in a minute."
Linus opened up on the tank, putting three rounds directly through the joint between the turret and the deck, and half a second later they exploded, leaving a twisted hole through which Linus could put more explosive rounds, just in case the tankers didn't die from the shrapnel of the original explosions. "Time to go to work, Lost Boys. We remember the We Sing."
"Aye sir!"
"Don't sir me, I'm a corporal," Linus's team laughed at him. Linus still couldn't find his humor. Hot plasma bolts splashed against his battlescreen, and he started eliminating soft targets.
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Thank you in advance to anyone willing to read my paragraphs and offer their wisdom!
I am a first-time home owner and the second owner of a four-year-old tract home constructed by Lennar on lots of clay, worth ~$800k. It's a 4500 sq. ft. home with a basement on a 7000 sq. ft. lot. By all evidence and accounts from neighbors, the previous owner didn't spend a lot of time at the house and didn't put any effort or money into maintaining it. He killed most of the lawn and killed then removed the small handful of bushes that the builder put in.
If I try to separate all these problems out, I have:

1. A concrete sidewalk running around the side and back of the house has dropped ~4", causing the downspouts to dump ONTO the concrete and foundation wall instead of into drains that go under the sidewalk. I need the downspouts extended.
2. The sidewalk also pulled away from the foundation wall as it fell, opening a 1/4" gap. There's a woody plant growing there in at least one spot now ... This needs to be sealed up with caulk of some kind.
3. The garage has lifted 1.5" in some places and dropped 3" in others, has multiple 8-foot 1/2"-wide cracks, and water pools in a "bowl" in the center. This needs to be removed and re-poured with appropriate compacted fill.
4. The sidewalk terminates behind the house where the steps from the back deck go down to the lawn. The furthest end of this sidewalk has a severe slope back toward the foundation supporting the deck, and it's twisting the sidewalk down so it has the wrong slope ~15" back from where it terminates. This either needs concrete lifting for the whole sidewalk, or for the part with negative slope (and accept the tripping hazard where the lifting stops), or removal and re-pour with appropriate compaction.
5. The furthest end of the sidewalk has also dropped an inch or so, which leaves the steps down from the back deck unsupported and slanted downward (a little treacherous for walking on when wet). Lifting the concrete can support the steps, BUT to get the grade on the concrete right I have to cut ~1/2" off the bottom of the steps. So I need a carpenter?
6. There's a leak in the gutter where it reaches a corner, right above the entrance to the house. This creates a 12"-wide ice sheet delivery drivers have to step over to drop packages at my door.
7. My basement sump pump runs more often than any of my neighbors'. It has excavated a 3" deep and 16" diameter hole in my front lawn, and covers the sidewalk with a 6-foot wide patch of water 24/7 (only my house has this problem, among the ~40 I see on my twice-daily walk with the dog).* This needs to be routed into a new underground drain that distributes the water better for absorbtion.
8. What's supposed to be an even grade down to a valley between my house and the neighbor's and then down to the road is now undulating forming little pools of water. This needs the existing surface removed (rocks with some fabric underneath), fill added and compacted, and then the surface rebuilt.

The structural engineer I had come look at it is confident there is no foundation issue and that the concrete issues are from insufficient compaction during construction, not caused or exacerbated by drainage problems. The home inspector disagreed, but engineer trumps inspector in my opinion.
The cost of doing everything above looks to be $30k - $40k. The biggest items are 8 > 3 > 4+5 > 7. I've got the money, just some ... questions:

• How would you all prioritize the issues above?
• Is it normal to spend $30-40k dealing with construction issues on a nearly-new house?
• Is there something I can Google ("general contractor"?) to find one person who can do all this stuff, or do I need to hire a separate specialist for each job?
• Do I need to hire an engineer to spec out the fixes and then get quotes to meet that spec, or should I ask the contractor / vendor to both design the fixes and give me quotes?

DIY'ing this is not an option for a bunch of reasons I won't go into, mostly my skills and my work commitments, so I will definitely be paying folks to do all this for me.
* That being said re. the sump, the pump is definitely able to keep up with the water, and I have zero flooding in the basement even in weeks and days of record-breaking rains.

This piece recounts the first time I drank an ancient plant medicine called Ayahuasca. It comes from Amazonian tribes who consider it a sacred plant medicine with healing powers and, given what a hugely beneficial impact it has had on my life, I am very comfortable describing it as medicine.
One Saturday, in the spring of 2016 I was greeted by the medicine man himself with a big hug, let’s call him Blu. I came into his kitchen to be greeted by several women with slightly comical homemade, feather headdresses and couldn’t help but think I’d walked into a kid’s birthday party. In the garden, there was a small festival tent set up which had a hay bale altar with easter decorations.
The ceremony had around 30 other participants and 10 shamans. In the middle of the tent stood the medicine man’s wife, Sun who was very much the master of the ceremony. She had the most daring headdress, flowing orange robes and a rattle in her hand. She spoke to us with warm, friendly humour telling us that we would know the medicine had kicked in once her singing started to sound good!
She advised that each experience is unique and we should try not to have huge expectations, sometimes nothing at all happens the first time. Having waited five years for this day I was quietly confident that this would not be the case for me and boy was I right!
We went around the circle introducing ourselves and explained what we were hoping to get out of the ceremony. Focusing on your intent during a psychedelic experience is meant to help you get what you are looking for.
During my turn, I expressed my desire to regain my self-confidence and passion for the opportunities and women in my life to whom I never seem to be able to fully commit.
Once we had all shared, we learned that it was time to drink.
My heart was filled with profound forbearing and excitement as I went up to receive a small glass of harsh-tasting, brown liquid which certainly tasted like medicine!
I had a basic camping mattress and a duvet laid out for me which I snuggled into before pulling on my eye mask. I was on my back trying not to think too much about the medicine, whether it was working or maybe wouldn’t work while I meditated for an hour.
The shamans started singing and shaking rattles. One of the female shamans, Nubia had an incredibly beautiful soprano voice that stood out from the others. It was while listening to the song of the shamans that I started to feel a warm flow of energy along my limbs. I tried to dismiss it at first, thinking it might somehow be related to my fasting for 40 hours prior.
When I moved my eye mask to let some light into my eyes I saw the tent roof overlaid with a flowing grid of beautiful, metallic, geometric grids with multi-coloured light flowing through the lines. The Individual elements of the grid reflected every colour of the rainbow like oil on water’s surface and I started to feel joyful, like a child rolling through leaves on a warm autumn day.
Nubia started singing to us again and it was like nothing I’d ever heard. It was so beautiful and mesmerizing I didn’t want her to stop.
I could hear the people around me, some giggling and some vomiting or, purging medicine into their buckets. I checked myself, asking if should I purge but I felt a gentle presence speak inside of me saying: ‘No, you’re fine. Just relax.’

They call this presence Mother Ayahuasca. The reason people drink the brew is to speak with and receive her guidance.

My eye mask was back on my face and I turned into the fetal position with the duvet pulled over my head I felt exceptionally comfy with this strange yet familiar presence as I started to explore the un-intimidating hallucinogenic world within my mind. She showed me complex pictures of flowing energy with multicoloured lights in perfect alignment while I was gently gliding along, watching the beautiful colourful spectacle.
It was around this time that Sun asked into the ceremony if anybody would like a second dose. I slowly sat upright and looked around. I checked myself. Truthfully, I was enjoying the experience. I was slightly nervous that having more could take me to a deeper, darker place however I had mentally prepared myself for the full immersion experience.
The presence told me: ‘It’s okay. You can handle it. I’ll be gentle.’
So I pulled on my shoes, got up and slowly walked over feeling slightly wobbly. I was worried Sun might tell me I’d had enough but when I sat in front of her, she gave me a big smile and beckoned me towards her. The second dose was about half the previous one and tasted familiar, not quite as harsh.
After I got up I walked out of the tent into the house. Sitting in the small toilet I saw the walls gently rippling with energy and recognized the phenomenon from previous psychedelic experiences. I’ve experienced mild, LSD-induced hallucinations before but nothing quite as mesmerizing as watching bright sparks of colorful energy emerging from objects and pictures.
Snuggling back under my duvet I listened to the rattles and felt myself floating deeper into the kaleidoscopic universe seeing my own body curled up but instead of my skin and flesh, I saw myself as streaming veins of energy. Millions of thin fibre optic threads pulsated with warm healing energy which outlined my body.
I felt myself lying on the floor in the jungle with mystical symbols and ineffable tribal figures around me. I felt like I was in a different, timeless dimension however I was surprisingly lucid and could snap out of it to check myself with ease. At some point I had to giggle as my boring pragmatist made the smart-ass remark, ‘You’re not lying in the jungle. You’re in a garden less than 100 meters from the Thames estuary!’
I had my eyes closed for most of the afternoon. I was seeing ever richer patterns. When I opened my eyes the patterns were still there but they were overlaid on the reality in front of my eyes. I could change them with the blink of an eye or bring back shapes I had seen previously.
I started thanking this entity for showing me all this beauty and felt the urge to reciprocate. I revealed some personal memories but they looked so very different. It seemed like they had a photo filter applied that filled the memory with golden light as they came alive with breathtaking beauty, streaming with colourful energy. I visited various life moments and it felt like entering into a photo and suddenly being there on that day!
I was there sitting in our garden at home. Once again I was a chubby baby covering my face with baked beans. I was actually there! I was picking the baked beans off my face and pushing them, one by one into my mouth.
They say that Mother Ayahuasca is a deep ancient spirit and I always imagined her as a deeply serious, majestic queen. I started wondering what she might look like… and so she appeared.
She was stern but not an old woman. Aya was young, perfectly matched to my age and exceptionally beautiful. She had long, smooth brown hair and big beautiful eyes filled with power and inspiration. As I looked closer at her exquisite face I realized that her features were constantly changing complexion. Her skin cycled from Amazonian to Latin to Nubian to Oriental and Mediterranean. She was outlined by swirling rainbow-coloured curls of light. The rest of her naked body only came into being when I directly looked at it. I realize that she was not one woman but a combination of every beautiful woman I’ve ever felt attracted to. I wanted her. She wanted me. We kissed and whirled around as we floated through my Entheoverse. My body of swirling rainbow energy flowed into her and hers into mine and this is how we made love passionately.
I had visions of us being on a summer weekend getaway in a stylish city. We lay in luxurious hotel rooms and I remember a cream-coloured clock on the wall, with Roman numerals but no hands to tell the time. I was dressed smartly as I led her by her hand into classy restaurants that had champagne poured, waiting by our table. It was like we were on a never-ending date, teleporting from one experience into the next, eloping while taking our time to enjoy each other’s energy, and passionately loving one another.
Afterwards, she lay in my arms and I asked what else she could show me and she replied; ‘What else would you like me to show you?’ I wasn’t prepared for this and my mind went a bit blank realizing that I could do anything, go anywhere in space and time I wanted.
I asked her; ‘Can you help me find my confidence?’
There was no clear answer. Instead, I had the random idea to become the temple stem of my friend Julio’s glasses. I looked at him from the bit next to the hinge and I could see him put the glasses on in the morning, and take them off at night and in the reflection of his right eye, I saw him coming home and watched his beautiful daughter jumping into his arms. Then I saw on his eyeball the reflection of me walking into the room and a felt warm glow spread through me.
Next, I visited my baby nephew sitting in my brother’s living room, in his red chair. I crossed my hands on my chest like he does and saw my brother and his wife smiling at me giving me warm hugs but more than seeing their faces while they hugged my body I could feel the way they felt when they put their arms around me and press me to their chests.
I saw all my brother’s smiles and happy faces as we jollied about, trying to make each other laugh as we do. I visited all my closest friends, took in their smiles and one by one, as I hugged each of them, I could feel their love for me.

Later I realized that Aya was indeed trying to give me confidence by showing me how much the people in my life care for me

I visited the girl I had just started dating called Anna whose raw energy I find simply irresistible. I came into her new apartment that I’d never visited before. She was standing in sexy lingerie by a floor-to-ceiling window looking down onto the busy Tottenham Court road. I remember her turning her beautiful face as I approached, touching it with ten fingers and kissing her lips passionately as we erupted into rainbow swirls of energy.
I also visited my ex-girlfriend Jo, whose body and spiritual mind I still loved but whose soul is too damaged by the fear of rejection and tough mental armour I never managed to vanquish.
She was asleep in our white room in LA that she had so carefully decorated and I spooned my energy into her little body. She woke and we cuddled and kissed and I said I was sorry it didn’t work out between us and she replied; ‘It’s ok. I wasn’t ready for you…’
I asked Aya if we had made the right decision to stop forcing it and just be friends and felt her nod wisely.
At some point, I remember all three of us lying in bed together but instead of feeling like the king of the world, I felt like a greedy pig.
One of the underlying themes of the whole journey was how slowly gently and unhurried everything felt and I think the lesson I was meant to learn was that it’s ok to not settle right now — I thought I just haven’t found the one, the right woman to share my life with…
Aya kept giving me gentle advice throughout. I asked her about the stimulants I love such as cannabis, coffee and alcohol but instead of the stern telling-off I was secretly hoping to receive she told me; ‘You know they don’t serve you when you abuse them but they are also a part of what shaped you… Take care of the beautiful body you have been given.’
She repeated many times; Take care of yourself more… take care.
I asked Aya how I could find the power to harness my mind which has always been blessed and cursed with a distracting imagination and to keep my lack of attention from killing my dreams.
Instantly, I saw an unreal version of myself.
I was standing in something like a black shiny display window, straight out of a Mercedes advert. This guy was not merely a little bit better than I am now and I realized that the version staring back at me was my best self!
That guy is sharp, he is determined, and he dresses immaculately. That guy knows exactly what he is doing. When he enters the room, people notice his presence from the invisible halo that brightly surrounds him.
I asked Aya, how I could become him and the answer became clear. That guy works. He knows exactly where his energy comes from and all of a sudden I understood — The confident image he projects comes from the love he feels for himself which makes him look loved and successful in other people’s eyes. There is no room for distraction because that guy knows his worth and knows his purpose.
She gave me such a clear image of myself. I can still see myself standing motionless in the black, shiny shop window with rainbow-coloured fibre optic strains lighting the air that gently flowed around me.
How long I lay like that is impossible to say but I guess it was around 5–6 hours but it felt like an eternity of journeying into myself.
But it wasn’t all just warm energy and neon colours. I distinctly remember at some point realizing, it was time to go to the toilet. Afterwards, I walked back into the garden and found the Ewok-faced little terrier yapping at me. I laughed at him as I noticed the blue silver and chrome energy swirls around his head and ears. I couched down to see if I could pacify him but I suddenly became aware that his barking must be interfering with other people’s experiences. I turned to hurry into the tent as one of the shamans came out, to tell off the dog saying; ‘What’s wrong doggy, he’s alright!’ As I walked into the tent there were certainly more people sitting upright than when I had left and I read some irritated expressions on people’s faces, at least three people got up and walked out.
I lay down in shame but all my friend’s energy avatars ran up to me saying ‘It’s fine!’ as they doggy piled on top of me. It made me feel better. I felt them warm the cold shame out of me and I began relaxing again. I played around as before but the energy had markedly changed, it didn’t feel as light-hearted anymore. It was heavier and more serious. I was feeling the effects of the medicine becoming even stronger so I decided to sit up but when I opened my eyes, I saw Nubia hit the deck at my feet on a hastily arranged bed after having just purged into a bucket. I could see vomit in her black wavy hair as I started to think, ‘…oh dear if even the shamans are starting to falter, I’m in trouble.’
I didn’t know what to do. I tried to lie back down again. I asked Aya to help me, as she had several times previously when I’d gotten a little bit frightened but this time I could not sense her presence and I knew why. I had to go through this for myself.
It felt like I was sitting in a shopping trolley, rolling down a steep hill toward darkness, realizing as it picked up speed and bucked to and fro that this had been a bad decision, a dangerous idea and the only way it would end would be for the momentum to collide with suffering.
I needed help so I weakly put up my hand and within a few seconds, one of the shamans sat down next to me. She was wearing a white feather dress and occoured to me like an angel. She helped me sit up and as soon as I was sitting upright I began to retch. She passed me my bucket which I gratefully barfed into…
After I purged I felt better. My angel asked me if I felt okay again and I asked her to stay with me and hold my hand for a while longer, which she did. I gently leaned over and rested my head on her feathery bosom and felt a sense of peace and strength flow back into me. I saw my energy self, the swirling electrons of light curling my limbs as I sat cross-legged, hunched over like a bear cub being cradled by his mother bear.
She helped me lie back down and I started to return to my technicoloured dream state. I asked Aya if we could make love again and she said ‘Of course’ but it felt different, when I opened my inner eye to see the face of the person I was entangled with I saw my own. Aya had taken on my form and this might well be the strangest thing I’ve ever written but I was exceptionally attracted to myself and I realized that this could be how girls who are in bed with me see me. I could feel the burning desire a girl feels when we make love. It felt strange but also good.

They said Ayahuasca show you not what you want to see but rather what you need to see at any specific point in your life.

I visited countless friends, some people no longer in my life becouse we have grown apart and even those whose who have passed away. I visited my German grandparents and told them how much I loved them.
While I cuddled Oskar, the dog I grew up with, and played with him in our garden I looked up to see my dad approach us with tears in his eyes. I knew what he was going to say. When he told me that my grandmother had died I didn’t run away in confusion as I had on that day, instead, I went to hug my mom and for the first time, I empathized with the pain she had felt in that moment of hearing that her mother had passed.
I visited my friend Keith whose passing I have always felt a slight responsibility for since I know he read my travel blog and went to Costa Rica a month after I’d been there where he swam out to sea and drowned. I hugged him tightly and cried gently but he grabbed me firmly by the shoulders and said; ‘It wasn’t you! It wasn’t you…’
I visited my old school friend Alex who I had not been close to but whose misfortune to be on flight 447 still touched me. I told him and his beautiful fiance whom I’d never met that I was so sorry for them having been so frightened when they died but instead of me comforting them, they hugged and comforted me as I lay there silently crying for the people I missed. But it was not painful. Quite the opposite, it felt cathartic, like I was letting out the pain and healing myself.
At some point, while it was still light out Sun said “OK, I know that some of you are still on your journey but we will start having some food soon so if you want to share what you experienced now is the time.” I listened to some of the reports.
Several people said that they had a very rough ride because they had tried to fight it. One girl even said she was convinced she was dying. I felt very lucky and grateful for my gentle, warm ride through my multi-coloured Enthenoverse and wondered if I would ever return…
When it was my turn I said that I had finally been able to see how my friends and family see me and why they think I am awesome which will give me the confidence to finally believe that I am awesome (that got a laugh :). I also shared my new appreciation for how profoundly beautiful my life has been up until now and hoped that it will give me the strength to stop comparing myself to others, to focus on my own path and become my best self.

10 weeks later

My life has undeniably changed over the last 10 weeks.
The following day I drove back to my rented shepherd’s hut in a nature reserve and had an exceptionally rich experience walking through the marshes. The sun was shining and everything seemed so intensely beautiful. I was moved just by watching something as simple as a male and a female bird fly across the water in perfect sync. It made me well up emotionally.
I’ve cried a lot recently and I believe it’s a good thing. I cry on most days.
Usually, it happens when I see someone doing something kind and for a brief moment I get overwhelmed and shed a tear. But again, they are not tears of pain they are usually tears of joy and I feel like I have become much more in touch with my emotions.
It feels like bringing Aya’s female spirit into my awareness has tripped a switch in my brain making me more feminine, hence a more complete human being. I’ve also started to care more about my appearance. My mum commented recently that I looked different and she is right. I’ve been working out more. I get my hair cut more frequently and I’ve even gone and bought new clothes that dress me with more style, even when it’s not particularly necessary.
My work attitude has also changed. I find myself a lot more productive and capable of operating at a higher level while enjoying the entire experience so much more!
I honestly feel more in control of my life. I feel focused on who I am, who I can become and what I can achieve. Previously my decisions in life seemed more vague and fuzzy.
Above all, I feel the happiest that I have felt since childhood. The last 10 weeks have been almost like a too-good-to-be-true dream for me.
I’m also positively influencing the people around me. My grandfather wrote me the following sentence after my most recent visit.
You have this mysterious gift of raising the spirits of people both just by being there and by your gift of empathy.

Epilogue

I have indeed had more Ayahuasca ceremonies since I first wrote this and even though there was a 4 year gap between my 4th and my 5th experience I have felt the effect compound over time. I will be publishing more of my trip reports over on medium and would appreciate your supporting me by following me over there where I also publish contant whihc is not just psychedilic in nature. https://medium.com/@hi_niels