How many calories in brown rice
1500 kCals A Day!
2015.03.10 22:08 THUMB5UP 1500 kCals A Day!
A sub about eating on 1500 calories total per day.
2015.09.23 01:32 anditsmeg13 a vegan version of the wonderful r/1200isplenty
A sub for vegan weight loss. Welcome to a community much like 1200isplenty where users share meals and tips, with a twist! Everything you'll find here is 100% vegan. We have animal-free recipes, dishes, and snacks to help you achieve your weight loss goals. Whether your daily calorie limit is 1200, 1400, or even 1600 or more, everybody is welcome to post and comment here. A vegan CICO based diet can benefit anybody trying to maintain or lose weight.
2016.08.01 23:19 SomeRandomUserGuy Cheese and Rice!
That subreddit with no posts and a shitton of subscribers. Taking over reddit, one grain of rice at a time.
2023.05.29 04:55 Interesting-Wrap-841 does this happen often at other clothing stores?
I have so many people come up to the counter with around 20 items asking me if I can price match each one to the online price. I totally understand wanting to get the best price, but if it’s more than like 3 items…just shop online?? Our policy is that if the customer shows us the price online with their phone then we can match the price. Big kicker is that our store wifi is terrible so I usually always just have to stand there waiting for their phone to load and have THEM complain about how slow the wifi is. Like ma’am there are people behind you in line. Someone today even asked me if I could look it up on MY phone???
submitted by Interesting-Wrap-841
to retailhell [link] [comments]
2023.05.29 04:55 GoodGetGorilla 5 common mistakes for beginner pickleball players to avoid
Here are five common mistakes that beginner pickleball players should try to avoid:
- Holding the Paddle Too Tightly: One common mistake is gripping the paddle too tightly. This can hinder wrist mobility and result in less control over shots. Beginners should focus on maintaining a relaxed grip to allow for more fluid and accurate strokes.
- Standing Too Far Back: Beginners often stand too far back from the non-volley zone (kitchen) line, which makes it challenging to react quickly and efficiently. It's important to move closer to the net to have better control and be ready for volleys and dinks.
- Overhitting the Ball: Many beginners have a tendency to hit the ball too hard, sacrificing accuracy and control. It's crucial to learn how to generate power with proper technique rather than relying solely on brute force. Focus on controlled shots that keep the ball in play.
- Neglecting Footwork: Proper footwork is essential in pickleball. Beginners may make the mistake of not moving their feet enough, leading to poor positioning and difficulty reaching shots. Practice footwork drills and focus on staying light on your feet to improve your court coverage.
- Not Communicating with Doubles Partner: Communication is key in doubles play. Beginners often forget to communicate with their partner, resulting in confusion, missed shots, and overlaps. Develop clear communication signals and establish a system for effectively communicating on the court.
submitted by GoodGetGorilla
to BeginnerPickleball [link] [comments]
2023.05.29 04:55 Edward2704 Don Jr. 2024 Montana Senate Race running against Don Jr. full mod writing (keep in mind that Don Jr. owns a ranch in Montana)
Italics = advisor feedback
- Congratulations Don Jr., after a contentious primary with Matt Rosendale and Greg Gianforte, you have emerged victorious in the Republican primary. What will be your opening statement as you pivot towards the general Montana senate election with Jon Tester?
- Why screw up this thing. I’ll run a low-risk campaign and cruise to victory. After all, my dad is the Republican nominee for president, so I can certainly ride his coattails to victory “This might work but don’t underestimate Jon Tester, he’s quite popular in Montana”
- I want to nationalize this race as much as possible and attack Jon Tester relentlessly, Tester has voted in lockstep with Biden and Pelosi “This might work, but most Montanans are more focused on state issues rather than national issues”
- I want to appear with my dad, Donald Trump, as much as possible as I campaign “People want to see you differentiate yourself from dad occasionally, and this doesn’t help much”
- I want to denationalize this race as much as possible. I want to take pictures of myself on my Montana ranch and focus on the farmers and workers in this state “nationalizing this race is your best chance, considering that your father is the Republican nominee for president”
- Due to the rural nature of Montana, the average Montanan spends more on gas than almost any other state in the country, and as gas prices continue to rise, what would you do to lower them?
- I would work with Senator John Thune to construct the Dakota Access Pipeline, which will transport gas faster and thus drop the price of gas, unlike Biden and the Democrats who want to shut down the construction of the Dakota Access Pipeline “This is good in that it criticizes the Democrats while also offering a different solution.”
- The way you lower gas prices is by getting Biden and the Democrats out of the office and putting in Trump and the Republicans, as gas prices were nowhere near as high as they were when Trump was president “This attack somewhat damaged Biden, but the damage is limited because people want to know what you would do differently from him.”
- One thing we could do to lower gas prices is to switch sides in the Russia-Ukraine war and side with an oil-rich Russia, rather than siding with oil-poor Ukraine, and we could get more oil through deals with Russia “Are you insane?”
- RNG. Your father, who is running for president from within a prison cell, has asked if you could attend one of his rallies that are being held from just outside his prison cell where he will be visible to the large crowd through the window of his prison cell in New York. Would you like to attend this rally outside the prison?
- Yes, I would “Good news, the rally outside of Trump’s prison cell was just the right size, in that it was large enough to fire up Trump’s base in Montana, but not so large that it would grab the attention of the liberal media. Good job”
- Yes, I would. “Bad news, the rally outside of Trump’s prison cell had a lot of both trump supporters and protestors and the two groups quickly turned violent and it drew an enormous amount of media attention and you are getting badly hurt by the controversy.”
- No, I wouldn’t “Good news, the Montana people respected your ability to be removed from national politics of a rally outside of Trump’s prison cell.”
- No, I wouldn't “Bad news, Trump’s base is furious at you for not showing up to your father’s rally from outside of Trump’s prison cell.”
- Inflation continues to ravage the nation. How will you put an end to it?
- We’re gonna stop handing out money and stop all this nonsense spending. “This has fired up your core supporters, but most independents are worried about this kind of messaging.”
- I would like to reduce tariffs and remove regulatory barriers “Trump’s tariffs are popular with the Trump wing of the Republican party, but this answer should win over more libertarian-minded Republicans”
- The destructive conflict between Ukraine and Russia continues to go on. How will you put an end to it if at all?
- I will urge for American neutrality in the Ukraine-Russia war “You’ve pleased your diehard base, but most independents want America to side with Ukraine during this destructive conflict”
- I will keep the current path of issuing sanctions against Russia “This is probably the best answer to please the majority of Montanans.”
- I will urge America to get involved on Ukraine’s side against Russia “This wins over independents at the expense of winning over your base.”
- I will urge the UN to create a demilitarized zone on the Ukraine-Russia border and urge Ukraine and Russia to come to a comprehensive peace treaty “This wins over the neocons in your party at the expense of the Trump wing of your party.”
- China has repeatedly made threats against Taiwan, and there have been fears that China might invade Taiwan. How will you prevent this from happening?
- This is Taiwan’s problem, not ours “This wins over the hardcore isolationists in your party at the expense of mainstream Americans”
- We will issue sanctions against China if they choose to invade Taiwan “This is probably the best answer to please the majority of Montanans”
- I urge America to intervene in this conflict against China “Are you insane, no one wants war with China!”
- I will urge China and Taiwan to create a demilitarized zone between them and a comprehensive peace treaty “This might be a good strategy”
- There continue to be migrants and drugs that are flowing across the southern border. What would you do to stop this from happening?
8. Jon Tester, despite being a senator from Montana, one of the most pro-gun states in America, strongly came out in favor of gun control after the Uvalde shooting. What is your opinion on gun control
- We need to strengthen our border security and build a wall “This is a good solution to win over the hard-core Trumpsits in your party”
- Look, this is Montana, we are nowhere near the southern border. Do we need to campaign on this issue? “Fair enough”
- We need a compromise solution of granting the illegals in this country a pathway to citizenship in return for building a stronger immigration enforcement system “This is a good way to win over independent voters”
- The Democrats are using school shootings as an excuse to take away our 2nd amendment rights “This attack is mildly successful, but the damage is limited because people want to know what you would do differently to stop school shootings”
- We need more armed guards at the front of schools to prevent these shootings, not to take away guns “This is an interesting solution”
- We need to spend more money on mental health clinics to treat these dangerous individuals “This wins over the Trump wing of social conservatives, but many fiscal conservatives are uncomfortable talking about this much government spending”
- Abortion has become an increasingly important issue throughout America, how will you deal with this issue
- I will pass a law that will ban abortion nationwide “This fires up your base at the expense of independents”
- This isn’t our problem. We will let the people of each state decide that for ourselves “This fires up independents at the expense of the base”
- We should pass a law that bans travel from one state to another or traveling from one country to another to receive an abortion “This should meet the fine line of appealing to your base while also winning over independents.”
- Now onto more state-centered issues. The state of Montana has an enormous amount of agriculture, farms, and ranches, and the amount they make has been decreasing. How will you plan to deal with this
- I will fight for Montana exports in trade deals “ an unusual position for a Republican to take, but this could work”
- This isn’t a problem we can solve, this is for the free market “This is a more traditional platform to run on as a Republican, but not a popular one amongst the Montana people.”
- RNG Will you agree to debate Jon Tester?
- Yes I will “You won”
- Yes I will “You and Tester tied”
- Yes I will “You lost”
- No, we have a massive lead “People don’t trust you if you don’t debate, expect this to hurt you badly”
- RNG You are meeting with Libertarian candidate Rick Breckenridge, to see if you can convince him to drop out and endorse you.
- I hope he drops out "Good news. He dropped out."
- I hope he drops out "Bad news. He doesn't drop out."
- There's no way around it. Although you own a ranch in Montana, Montana is not your state of permanent residence and many view you as a carpet bagger. How do you plan to respond?
- I will counter-attack by showing Tester as a DC insider who is out of touch with Montanan values "This doesn't work well, as Tester routinely tours the state"
- I will tout my outsider credentials as an advantage, as I can reform Montana from the outside to Make Montana Great Again “MMGA”
- Which Montana Republican would you like to go on tour with today?
- I would like to go on tour with Montana’s governor, Greg Gianforte “Well this didn’t work out well, as many are still angry about the incident that Greg Gianforte caused in 2017 when he ran for the house and bragged on social media about how he was so far ahead in the polls that he could beat up a reporter and still win, then proceeded to beat up a reporter and still narrowly won. Expect to take a dip in the polls.”
- I would like to go on tour with Montana’s incumbent Republican senator, Steve Daines “This worked out well, as Steve Daines is broadly popular amongst conservatives and independents”
- I would like to go on tour with Matt Rosendale, who ran for the Montana senate seat in 2018 and lost “Campaigning with Matt Rosendale offends no one, but pleases no one either”
- News has broken out about how your girlfriend, Kimberly Gilfoyle, has been fired from Fox News for sexual harassment. How do you want to do damage control?
- As much as I love my girlfriend, I have no control over her behavior and I condemn this incident of behavior completely “This is probably the best you could do given this bad situation”
- Who cares, this is my girlfriend’s sexual harassment case, not mine “Well, you’re the one who’s dating her, so this makes you look bad.”
- I condemn my girlfriend completely for this behavior and I am breaking up with her for it “This is a strong answer which could win over women voters, but this only draws more attention to an incident that already looks incredibly ugly”
- How would you like to attack Jon Tester if at all?
- We need to emphasize that Jon Tester has voted with Joe Biden 91% of the time. Jon Tester pretends to distance himself from Biden, but Tester is just one of Biden’s puppets who happens to be in a Trump +16 state “That’s it, hit Tester where it hurts!”
- We need to emphasize that Jon Tester is out of touch with Montana values lives in Washington DC and constantly votes in lockstep with Nancy Pelosi and votes for drag queens and transing the kids “This attack doesn’t win over independents, but it sure does fire up the base”
- We should run compare and contrast ads between Kyrsten Sinema and Jon Tester, showing how Sinema is in a bluish-purple state and constantly stabs Biden in the back while Jon Tester is from a deep red state and constantly votes lock step with Biden “This ad was incredibly effective”
- We should run ads of gas prices soaring under Tester and Biden, while gas prices were falling under Trump Sr. and will continue to fall under Trump Jr. “This ad was mild to moderately effective, but voters want to know what specific policy you will implement to lower gas prices
- One interesting idea that has been proposed by many Democrats is to put abortion clinics on Native American reservations, as their lands aren’t governed by the US. Montana has some of the most native reservations in the country. What are your thoughts on this?
- This is an abhorrent practice that will lead to more children being killed as a loophole around the Dobbs .vs. Jackson's case allowed each state to choose whether or not to allow abortion “This answer fires up the base but hurts you with independents”
- I don’t care either way, this is up for the leaders of the native reservations to decide themselves “This might be the best you can do with a difficult question like this”
- Small government means small government, therefore lands that are not on American soil should be allowed to build abortion clinics to serve the public, as we are the party of small government that favors bodily autonomy “This answer helps with independents and hurts with the base”
- Not to talk too much about abortion, but a new bill has been proposed in the Montana State House that would criminalize pregnant Montanans for traveling out of state or out of the country to receive an abortion elsewhere. What are your thoughts on this bill?
- I think Montana should ban all abortions within its borders, but banning Montana residents from traveling out of state or out of the country to receive an abortion elsewhere is too harsh “No one loves this answer, but no one hates it either”
- Being pro-life means being all the way pro-life, which means that we should criminalize out-of-state and out-of-country travel to receive an abortion elsewhere “Your base eats this up, but this stance makes independents gag”
- As a Republican, I naturally believe in making government as small as possible, meaning that native american reservations should be allowed to have abortion clinics and that people should be allowed to travel out of state and out of the country to receive abortions “Independents are lining up behind you, but your base is threatening to stay home”
- RNG. The Montana state legislature has just passed new laws banning Tribal ID cards and requiring you to present your address to vote, which Native Americans on reservations don’t have as a way to stop Native Americans, who disproportionately vote Democrat, from voting. What are your thoughts on this?
- This should help me win “Good news, Native Americans aren’t getting the new IDs and addresses necessary for voting for Tester, so this will help you.”
- This should help me win “Bad news, Native Americans are now turning out in higher numbers than ever before and are getting the new IDs and licenses necessary to vote. Expect this to hurt you.”
- You have talked about reducing the amount of money that we spend to reduce inflation. Where would you like to make cuts in spending
- I don’t know, everywhere maybe “This is not specific enough, and Jon Tester’s mediscare strategy is working eerily well”
- First, cuts will be made to foreign aid “In general, if you have to cut anything, cut foreign aid first, then again, most Americans are supportive of Ukraine in their war against Russia, so this might also backfire”
- We should cut farming subsidies and allow farmers to properly partake in the free market “Montana is a very agricultural state, so this doesn’t play well”
- Jon Tester has attacked you with an attack ad of you speaking with your father and Rudi Giuliani at the Save America rally on January 6th where you tell the crowd to stand up and fight as they proceed to walk towards the capital and invade it. How will you react
- This was a poor choice of words for me. Although I said the word fight in a physical sense, what I meant to say was fought in a metaphorical stance by protesting the certification of the 2020 election “This might be the best thing you can say to keep your base on your side while not angering independents”
- I played no role in causing the violence that most people did on January 6th as I meant to fight in a metaphorical sense, not in a literal sense. It should be noted that only a small portion of people that attended that rally on January 6th broke into the capital “Most voters believe that you played a role on January 6th, and this answer doesn’t help”
- These people who entered the capital were brain-dead idiots who thought this would be a good idea. Why should I be responsible for their actions “You were the one who encouraged them to do it.”
- Montana has one of the slowest internet speeds in the country due to its rural location. Would you be willing to spend government money to increase the internet speed in Montana?
- I understand the urge to help Montanans with slow internet, but this is a function best served by private companies, not the government “This helps with the base, but hurts with independents”
- We need to spend government money to help Montanans with slow internet “This helps with independents but hurts the base”
- Do you plan to pass more laws to engage in culture wars and ban drag story hour, and critical race theory
- No, these culture wars about drag story hour just distract from the main issues at hand “Some sense a missed opportunity to win points amongst the base, but others appreciate you for not constantly attacking”
- Yes, we need to protect our children from drag story hour and critical race theory “This will win you points amongst your base but hurt you with independents and libertarian-minded voters.”
- What will be your ending message as this campaign draws to a close?
- Don’t let Jon Tester fool you, he’s no moderate and he votes for Biden 91% of the time. Tester is Biden, and Biden is bad. Tester is Biden’s puppet. Make sure to vote for my dad for president and me for the senate. “This is probably a good strategy considering how Tester votes for Biden 91% of the time, and although Tester is somewhat popular in the state, Biden is not.”
- I want to hold a big rally in a field in Billings with a jumbotron where my dad is presented on the big screen from prison. My dad Trump Sr. will carry Montana by double digits, so all I have to do is ride his coattails to victory “Your dad is popular in Montana, so tying yourself to him as closely as possible might be a good idea.”
- I want to nationalize this race as much as possible. A vote for me is a vote for my dad who is running for president, while a vote for Tester is a vote for Biden “This is a good strategy, as you will need your dad’s momentum to gain victory in this senate race.”
- Where in Montana will you spend your last days campaigning
- I will campaign in the Helena area around Lewis and Clark and Cascade counties. Tester may have won them in 2018, but Trump won them in 2020, so with one last push, we should flip them red
- I will campaign in the rural eastern parts of the state to maximize conservative turnout such as in Custer and Prairie counties
- I will expand my appeal by campaigning in the rural northern parts of the state with Native American reservations such as Glacier County
- I will campaign in the Missoula area, a traditionally liberal area and college town in Missoula County
submitted by Edward2704
to thecampaigntrail [link] [comments]
2023.05.29 04:54 judethedude2106 Going into year 2 of Software Development Foundation Degree, have a particular liking for OOP and SQL, any tips, info or pointers on where to go from there?
Looking for some pointers as I go into year 2 of software dev. Foundation degree. Any advice is appreciated
So I’m currently going into my second and final year of my foundation degree in software development, the units I have completed so far are:
-Programming 1: Practical Java basics in Eclipse.
-Programming 2: Learning OOP through Java, also using Eclipse.
-System Analysis and Design: Creating analysis reports on potential systems and designing software systems on paper with UML diagrams and data flow diagrams etc.
-Database Systems: Creating and manipulating SQL databases and understanding ERDs.
-Software Testing: Learning types of testing, how to test a program and record with a test log, how to use tools such as Selenium and CassiniDev with Java.
-Maths for Programming: Calculus, number systems etc.
My second year begins in September and the following points are the units I will be completing and what I know about them so far:
-Programming 3: Will be using Visual Studio to create a working program with C# with a SQL database connected to it (my teacher is saying it is technically full stack development which is good for interviews)
-Computer and Network Architecture: Not sure on the specifics of this unit.
-Data Science: not sure on the specifics of this unit either.
-Work Based Learning: 5 month long placements in a local IT company. In placement 4 days a week (I don’t know what company it is yet.)
As you might be able to tell I’m still relatively new to this industry, but I’m still very passionate about it. I’ve always been into computers and regret not getting into things like programming earlier in life, but i am sure I have found the area of work I want to spend my life doing.
I’m posting to ask for advice on my options so I have a solid year in order to decide what I want I want to do. I don’t know many people in the industry so I think here would be a good place to get some pointers. To add some content I’m 19 and live in Northern Ireland, there is an abundance of reputable IT companies meaning I am likely to get placed in a good company. I particularly like what I’ve been doing in Java and SQL, expecting to enjoy C# too. I haven’t been achieving top grades, but I am getting high enough to get accepted into the best Uni in NI. My current options as I see things:
-University in NI: Unsure of which degree specifically but am leaning towards Computer Science, university here is significantly cheaper than mainland UK but my foundation degree will only allow me to pass into second year. Also unsure of whether to pursue a Masters Degree, but I’m leaning against it.
University in Great Britain: More expensive than NI but will be more likely to pass directly into third year.
Job After Placement: I am told that most students are offered full time jobs at the end of their placement at £30k, and sometimes offer apprenticeships where they will pay for me to complete my degree while I work for them. I will be locked down in this company for a few years though and I’ve been wanting to leave my city ASAP, but by no means does this mean I’m ruling this option out due to my desire to leave.
Find an Apprenticeship Elsewhere in UK: I’m not sure how plausible this is and feel it may be risky, but if possible I think I would pick this one, I would either move to the capital Belfast or go to the mainland. Potentially I could go international but I feel this would be extremely unrealistic.
Open University: I need to further look into this option, but it also sounds good, it is meant to be a 2 year, more affordable degree completed from home, but I lack complete understanding at the moment.
Wild Card, Find Work/Apprenticeship in Australia: I have family in Australia eager for me to visit them for awhile, they are very well of and this would give me time to get on my feet while out there. I would need to learn a lot more about the IT landscape out there before even considering this. I also would have to work out if it would even be possible immigration wise. This one is more of a dream but would do it if it was possible.
Thanks for reading this far, correct me if I’m incorrect about anything, any advice helps!
submitted by judethedude2106
to cscareerquestions [link] [comments]
2023.05.29 04:54 theBacillus Is this Agaricus, which kind? East Texas.
| || |
I found some today in East Texas in an mixed oak and red cedar forest. I've seen many similar ones on the walk. White purple cap, brown gills. Ring on the stem. submitted by theBacillus to Mushrooms [link] [comments]
Google lens claims it's Agaricus. I'm not sure which one of them, edible or poisonous. Let me know! Thx!
2023.05.29 04:54 lucky_omelette Has anyone else felt like this after losing a pet?
First the question then the vent off my chest: Is It fairly common or normal to feel a very deep pain (even after some months) due to the loss of a pet? I feel like I lost a family member, and I never felt this much pain/sadness about a family member passing away. I'm not at my worst anymore but it's still painful. Should I, by this time, have to already be completely over the death of my dog?
My parents and I had to put our 12 y/o dog to sleep because he had a terminal illness, the vet said that even if we allowed for the surgery to remove the tumor, there weren't many chances of him surviving because of his old age.
This happened on January, after 5 days of my dog feeling unwell. It was very sudden, he seemed perfect before new year's eve and then everything went downhill really fast. We never really felt he was too old, let alone think that he may have an illness. My dog was always very cheerful, energetic and affectionate, he didn't have many white hairs. We thought he was gonna live until 15 or 17 years old. The last few days he was (barely) alive was like the 12 years suddenly made their appearence.
I wanted to know if other people ever felt this much pain after losing a pet. It's been almost 6 months since he passed away. I (sometimes) have something that's best described as a ghost feeling of him being there in my backyard. I still dream of him from time to time. I have this pain that comes from the inmense love I felt for him. He wasn't just a pet, he wasn't just a dog. He was part of the family.
My father is still hurt by this like me, he said It feels kind of close to losing a child (of course losing a child is worse but you get It). How can we feel this amount of love and such strong bond with a little animal?. I really do feel like I lost a family member, I feel even worse than losing a family member because I lost my grandmother a few years ago, and I lost my grandfather this year too. Their departure didn't feel as painful. This was sudden for us because we really thought he would live longer. But he lived the exact life expectancy for his dog breed instead. The vet told us It wasn't our fault, this problem is common in his dog breed, and told us that if this dog lived normally this long without showing symptoms or pain is because we did the best we could, and we gave him a happy life.
I still feel a little regret. What if we catched the illness before? Could we have saved him? Maybe he could've lived longer? But I'll never know. Maybe this was the best way. For us and for him. Enjoying our company to the fullest, being happy.
Two friends of mine also lost their elderly dogs this year. But It seems like I'm the only one that still holds on to my dog. I don't think it's necesseraly unhealthy because I do not cry every day, and I don't think of him 24/7. But It hurts from time to time, I cry a little sometimes because I still miss him deeply.
I miss hearing his paws walking on the floor, I miss petting his soft hair and looking at his beautiful eyes. He was part of our daily lives. It doesn't feel like something is missing as much as before, but the knowledge that he's gone still hurts. He was the best dog, never hurted us, never misbehaved terribly. Before we knew what was wrong with him, I f*cking picked him up in new year's eve when he was feeling bad, to give him some affection, and he did not cry in pain or made a noise, he didn't bite me despite having a painful tumor on his belly. He was way too much of a good boy, the biggest smallest good boy there could ever be. I loved him and I still do. I grew up from child to adult with him. Last year he saw me graduate from university, and he (and I) met my LDR boyfriend for the first time (he adored my dog and always wished to play with him, which they did). I was even thinking of bringing him with me when I move out. It feels like my dog was waiting for the perfect time to go. When both my brother and I were adults, with me about to get independent, and when my parents both began to want to travel more.
I was not emotionally and mentally ready for his death, but could I ever be? Probably not. And I'm grateful I was able to be by his side on his last moments, even if It was painful. I wanted him to feel loved by us, and die peacefully, without any pain. Because he deserved that. The last day (without knowing for certain it would be the last day) I had the urge to take a picture with him, I also asked my bf if he would like to say goodbye to him on videocall (he did), and on the way to the vet, this song sounded on the radio: "Let her go" by Passenger. And the line "Only know you love her when you let her go" broke me and I teared a bit in the back seat of the car. I firmly believe It was a message because of the timing. And indeed, 3 hours later, I had to let my fluffy best friend go.
I have my own beliefs, not exactly religious. I have no clue whether there is a heaven or an astral plane or something. But even if we are just energy, souls or information, I want to be that with him one last time when I die.
Thank you if you took the time to read all of this. If anybody lost a pet recently, you can use this space too if you need to vent.
submitted by lucky_omelette
to offmychest [link] [comments]
2023.05.29 04:53 wharrisofficial Top comment add word to hail to the thief cover DAY 59 (Why is it called taking a shit, when you are leaving a shit?)
submitted by wharrisofficial to radioheadcirclejerk [link] [comments]
2023.05.29 04:53 Aggressive-Bus4276 I feel I lose to many friends and I'm always gonna be the "problem"
Igh I feel like a problem. I lose so many friends a while after I make them. I feel like the problem for it cuz I’m the one who's always left alone and idk y. I do try my best to be happy and me. And idk like I feel used in some relationships like j gives answers for homework. And others I tried my best and they still left and idk what I did wrong to cause them to leave. I feel bad. every time I have a “friend group”, They leave or I’m kicked out or I leave due to being left out. And it’s so dumb I do try to be the best friend/person j can and be likeable but I feel I always mess up and they start to hate me. maybe I do things people hate. Like I am awkward and maybe I am toxic and that causes people to leave. everyone around me is always in friendships they made since grade 8 and there’s me with some people but I feel used in those relationships or they are barely in drama. like I do try to be drama free but drama always follows me idk if it’s the people I hang out with or just me, I’m always dragged into drama and 1 I understand I did kinda cause it but others idk like I was just dragged in and the one with F I’m still confused about cuz I do think I didn’t do anything to cause it. Idk I’m sad I did try to make friends and have them stay but I can’t. And maybe they see me as a bad person who gets into too much drama and shit. I am trying to live peacefully and not be in drama but it just keeps coming around. I feel I just try too much. Also, I feel I always make friends with “bad” people who always cause drama and then get me into it. or I’m too boring idk. I just feel weird. even my family thinks I don’t have friends and I do try like I am trying to make friends but I feel a lil self-conscious and have social anxiety. And I kinda always feel ima lose them either way in the end. :( Maybe I’m the bad person and this is karma getting to me. And idk like k do try to make close friendships but I feel they don’t work and I think we're close but we ain’t. I had a friend B who I thought we were close but she hated me and talked shit behind my back. And I’m just sad like I just wanna feel normal and have friends and be myself. I feel off like everyone around me has a bunch of friends who they always hang out with and be happy with and then there’s me with 1 guy and not anyone else. And smts it feels awkward with him. And my other friends it feels awkward to hang out with them cuz they have their friend group. also like I just honestly wanna have a person I can do things with outside of school and not worry about anything. I just wanna have fun. Idk I feel I won’t ever get that and it hurts like I’m constantly reminded of it at school. I am trying but I just can’t make “friends” I’m trying so badly. Maybe I just don’t have enough confidence. like I tried online and in person but I feel off. And hon maybe I need to put myself out there and if I get in more drama it's fine ima be ok it's only high school and I learned from my past relationships. I'm just scared about F causing me drama in my new relationships and people believing her cuz she likes drama and getting people to hate her old friends cuz it makes her "look" better. Idk like that she's very fake after u know her F seems nice in person but she used to talk shit abt some people she knew to me and I would just read it and idk how I responded but smts I'll agree but I'll try to be like "oh yea no like they nice tho." ugh I hate myself for letting my guard down and letting her into my life but when we became friends idk anything abt her and thought she was nice but in reality, she was kinda sabotaging me. and hon like ik my other old relationships don't care and we are neutral but ik she's gonna hold a grudge and hate me for the rest of my life and try shit with me. Like that's what she did to her ex-bestie the one before me. She got me to hate her but she rly nice when u know her and ugh I wish I never let F manipulate and get me to do things that made me look bad to others ugh I just wish I was better and wish I could be normal and I'm just scared cuz F has so many friends at school who will support her and I feel will believe her over who I am. but also some hate her like this grade 9 she borrowed money from she still hasn't paid back and I feel bad cuz whenever he sees her she's always trying to avoid him. And also like idk I feel bad and ima be in random drama cuz of her. Like Id, I've been in more drama than a normal student and idk y I've been trying my best to never be in any drama too. like wtf and idk I'm just sad I wanna be normal and have fun and be me.
submitted by Aggressive-Bus4276
to TrueOffMyChest [link] [comments]
2023.05.29 04:53 alexlovers so i try to translate WN [P5V5]
Alright. So i am really curious with the next development of the story. and i try to translate with MTL but the result was hurt my head so much
i decide i change few thing atleast the result was readable.
If the result was good enough i will try to translate more
Note: forgive me if there's mistake in pronounciation or grammar. english was not my main language
Chapter 548 Eglantine stared at me and spoke about her experience visiting the shrine. With Hildebrandt's guidance, it doesn't take long to find the shrine. When she touched the door, she felt her mana was getting sucked and found herself inside the shrine. Hmmm. The first time I touched the shrine door. I felt I was being pulled, then suddenly I was in the shrine. But i didnt feel my mana used though. Maybe the amount of mana drawn out was so small that I didn't notice?. Perhaps I have become somewhat insensitive to the outflow of my mana because I always wore magic tools and my mana is always being sucked by the feystone. That's why, I don't feel any discomfort when a small amount of my mana is drawn out of me. "The shrine that I visited was dedicated to the fire god and his subordinate. Looking up at the statue of Leidenschaft, I suddenly felt the urge to pray and start whirling." Eglantine said. It Looks like there's a difference in how people act in front of God. In my case, whirling did not even cross my mind. Maybe for Eglantine, the act of praying to the gods must be a whirling. “When I was whirling my mana was drawn out by itself. It feels the same as we the royal family whirling in the auditorium while wearing feystone. As I was offering mana in this way, a blue feystone gradually began to form in Leidenshaft's hand." Eglantine exclaimed What ? I saw a blue tablet in Leidenshaft's hand from the moment I entered, didn't I? The Leidenshaft had a blue tablet in his hand from the beginning. I could see it was glowing slightly and had letters engraved on it, so I would have thought it was a blue tablet, not a blue feystone. It could be the amount of prayer and mana that has been dedicated to the Leidenschaft was the main factor. When I got the blue tablet I felt that the mana I had offered through prayer so far was somewhat mixed with the "will of God". “ Since I exhausted most of my mana, I drink a rejuvenation potion that I always carry in my waistband. then i felt the urge to whirl again” “ W -what ? you start praying again?” “Yes. I don't know why but I felt like I had to” In the end, use all the rejuvenation potion she had."When I finished, the blue feystone had grown considerably. But it was inscribed that I still hadn't prayed enough." Just how much mana are you trying to squeeze out of me, Leidenschaft! This is why you must have a good idea of what you're doing. It could have ended horribly According to eglantine time flows much slower inside the shrine and it looks like other people could not go inside. It was proven by Anastasius but to no avail all of his attempts failed. "It's locked," as he pushed the door. The result was the same with Magdalena and Hildebrandt, neither of them capable of entering the shrine. “' Isn't that the shrine where the zent candidate needs to pray ? wasn't there a stone slate in the library archive that said you need to go around many times to pray? What will happen when the prayers are enough and the blue feystone is completed?" I nodded my head , " I too wonder what will happen next ?”. If the royal family already had a zent candidate, I shouldn't mention I've already got the blue tablet, it would be a treason more than Dietlinde the self-proclaimed zent candidate already do. “Rozemyne didn't you also capable of entering the shrine ? as high bishop you must have prayed a lot and without doubt capable of entering the shrine. Furthermore, you weren't surprised by my story". Noooo. I am too busy thinking about the difference between mine and her experiences while entering the shrine. I am so stupid. I should have been more surprised. "Oh my, I was very surprised Hohoho" " I am stunned. The part that surprised me the most was the part about the dancing in the auditorium while wearing feystone. Did the royalty try to make the magic circle glow?" I digress. Eglantine smiled "Yes. After all you and ferdinand told us that the magic circle was used to select the next zent candidate, aren't you ? After the graduation ceremony, we held a ceremony to reacquire the blessing and challenged the royalty to see if we could make the magic circle glow." Since Dietlinde was able to make it glow, it seems that the royal family also danced while wearing feystone and releasing mana. Then Zent Trauerqual, Sigiswald, Anastasius, and Eglantine were able to make the magic circle glow. She said, "Zent, Prince Sigiswalt, and Anastasius, who became omni elemental by praying while performing the dedication ritual, were also able to make the magic circle glow, but I was the only one who was able to enter that shrine. Hasn't Magdalena reported this to you?”I nodded. “ I wonder what is the difference between me and Anastasius?" eglantine said “It’s Schtape” I said “What?” Eglantine blinked surprised by my respond “ While I transcribed a stone slate yesterday it’s written that the shrine is where the household deity is enshrined, and if you pray to it, you can produce feystone, just like you mentioned earlier. By obtaining them, it will strengthen your attributes. It seems that by obtaining the feystones of all the household gods, one can obtain the blessings the great gods, and there was a royal saying that you need to prayed desperately for while you were a student” (Note: Trust me it’s confusing) “You can only obtain a schtape once in your lifetime, right ? In the past schtape only obtained before graduation. And it seems royalty were desperate to be omni elemental by obtain the blessings of the Great God before getting schtape. The schtapes for the zent candidates had to contained all elements and obtained in the Garden of Beginnings. Did you get your’s there?" “I never heard about Garden of Beginnings before, but I got it in a place where it wouldn't be surprising if it were called that." Eglantine was stunned and slumped her shoulders in disappointment. “Doesn't that mean Prince Sigiswald, who lacked attributes when he obtained the Scthape, cannot enter the Shrine of the Fire God thus cannot be zent candidate ?” “Prince Sigiswald may not be able to, but Prince Hildebrandt could. If the royal academy changes time when acquiring the Schtape to before graduation, by praying a lot he is capable of acquiring life attributes , and get blessings from all the great gods in the blessing ceremony, I think he could be a candidate for the next Zent." I think Hildebrandt can handle it, since he has the guts to work hard and compress his mana in suct youg age. If Eglantine doesn't want to be on the front, then let Hildebrandt do his best. Now that he knows how to get the blessings of the Great God, he can handle it. The question is whether the current Zent will last until Hildebrandt comes of age
submitted by alexlovers
to HonzukiNoGekokujou [link] [comments]
2023.05.29 04:53 SBDovah Reduction and User Illusion: The Darkness's True Links to Consciousness
As we've learned more about the Darkness, we've come to know that it's more strongly connected to consciousness and psychic phenomena than the Light, while the Light is more associated with the physical world. There's been a lot of confusion and debate as to how this syncs with previous descriptions of the Darkness and its effects, with some going as far as to call it a retcon. I propose that not only is this not necessarily
a retcon (advice I'd apply to many prematurely jumped to conclusions around here, frankly), but that it could fit seamlessly with the Darkness as it was described prior to Lightfall. Specifically, its nature as the metaphysical embodiment of reduction.
Ontological Winnowing: Darkness and Reduction
Before we get into how the Darkness relates to consciousness, let's examine what we knew of the Darkness before that connection was revealed. One's first thought might be that the Darkness was presented as a force of hyper-Darwinism that defined and measured existence through conquest and violence... which it was, as illustrated through the Sword Logic. However, I'd argue that this wasn't the philosophical core of the Darkness, but rather an emergent outgrowth of a deeper nature (and that the same is likely true of its relation to consciousness). That deeper nature being reduction, as simply and as universally as that concept can be applied. The best evidence for this is probably found in Clovis's observations of Clarity...
This is the application of Clarity to state A to produce a lower-entropy stateB. (Clarity is fond of removing portions of a state configuration, harrowingthe phase space down to only its most robust inhabitants.)
What if there was some primeval chaos, some pre-cosmic entropy, whichwas soaked in Clarity to reduce it to that first nucleus of all existencewhich issued the Big Bang? What if Clarity's defiance of time-reversibilitymakes it a fountain of cosmic youth, returning all that is burnt out andburnt down to its state before the fire?Perhaps Clarity is the Ein Sof, the nameless god before creation.Preparator of the cosmic egg. Razor that cuts the fat of complication awayfrom the bone.---
The Vex radiolarian fluid is obviously too virulent for use in exominds. Butif exposed to Clarity, the Vex patterns break down, and the fluid takes onsome of the properties of Clarity itself—namely, its reductive effect.
Introducing a tiny aliquot of this reified Clarity into an exomind solves theloop/billboard/crash cycle. As far as I can tell—permanently.
THE COMBINATION OF VEX FLUID AND CLARITY IS THE KEY TOCYBERNETIC IMMORTALITY!
Speculation: the interaction of Clarity, with its caustic anti-structural properties, and the Vex mind fluid, with its highly physicalized and asymbolic architecture, creates a "physicalized algorithm" that can serve as a random seed for the knockouts required to sustain a viable exomind.
... which were that it has a fundamentally reductive nature. Not a destructive
one necessarily, as shown by Clovis using this reductive effect to bypass the billboarding problem and create functional Exos... just plain, neutral reduction. A skeptic might say that this effect on the Exos has less to do with Darkness's reductiveness and more with its general psychic properties, but aside from those aspects probably being closely connected anyway (more on that later), note Clovis's comments on Clarity's reduction of phase spaces in a general context, and his direct observation of it breaking down Vex radiolaria patterns. In other words, even if the Darkness reinforces Exo minds through its mental aspects to some extent, it certainly does so through its reductive aspects as well.
So with this reductiveness in mind, it's not that hard to see how one finds the Sword Logic and pursuit of the Final Shape, as maximal reductions of existence itself, in the Darkness. But how do the mind and consciousness enter this picture?
Informational Winnowing: Darkness and Consciousness
To start off this section, let's go back to our boy Clovis and his summary of Human cognition, in contrast to that of the Vex.
I note that the Vex milk, while computationally powerful, seems to avoid semiosis. That is, it prefers to mimic the actual dynamics of phenomena rather than assigning a symbol. This a fundamental difference between Vex cognition and our own. We encode inputs as symbols, manipulate the symbols according to some set of logical rules, and produce output. The Vex are more direct. Burn them, and they will extinguish the fire-not because they possess a symbolic knowledge of fire and its properties, but because their structure is so suited to adaption and survival that the heat of the fire directly becomes the response required to snuff it out. Rather than encoding symbols, they generate self-sustaining and self-correcting patterns, which like the suspension of a bridge flexing under strain, can accept destructive input and produce reparatory output.
TL;DR is that while Human (and apparently most species in Destiny) cognition relies on semiotics
, the assignment of mental symbols to external phenomena, the Vex just simulate the phenomena directly. To explore this distinction more, let's look at how a Vex's observation of an apple would differ from that of a Human. Place an apple in front of a Vex, and all the Vex would 'perceive' is a cluster of numbers and equations. Data representing all the particles and forces comprising the objective, physical existence of the apple and whatever interacts with it. And objectively speaking, that's all the apple really is anyway, as far as monist materialism is concerned.
Now place the apple in front of a Human. A Human generally won't perceive the apple in terms of the physics equations underlying it, but will instead tell you of its redness. Its roundness. The texture of its skin upon picking it up, and its taste and smell after taking a bite of it. Perhaps they'd also tell you of a happy memory involving an apple, or some weird superstition they have about apples. Or any number of thoughts Humans can have about apples... as mediated through their consciousness.
What's the fundamental difference between the Human take on apples and the Vex take? Symbols, just like Clovis said. In lieu of processing all the math and physics that describe the apple objectively, Human brains construct symbols of consciousness that subjectively substitute for those things. Apples appear red because they reflect a certain wavelength of light, but while a Vex would know an apple's redness only in that it simulates that wavelength of light and the apple's reflection of it, us Humans... just see red. For whatever reason, our brains construct this little illusion, the qualia
of redness, and assign it to that particular wavelength of light, and ditto for everything else we perceive. Even when we aren't directly perceiving something, but recalling or imagining it, our cognition is ultimately still constrained by this symbolic mode of thought.
In philosophy of mind studies, this topic is addressed in a concept called user illusion
, named so because it compares consciousness to a computer's user interface. What we see and interact with on a UI has virtually nothing to do with how the computer actually functions, except that it organizes and simplifies all the functions into little symbols we can grasp more easily. The same goes, according to this idea's proponents, for our conscious minds as to our unconscious minds. There's tons of fascinating research surrounding this, but a convenient factoid in the above link is how Humans perceive roughly 12 million bits of information through all our senses every second... but nearly all of this is processed subconsciously, and conscious processing only does about 60 bits per second.
In other words, what we consciously experience is filtered... or winnowed, you might say... from a vastly larger influx of information into a relative handful of symbols we can process more efficiently. But where do these symbols come from, at least in Destiny's case?
"Metaphor simplifies as the knife does."
It's easy to see where I'm going with this now, but for extra support (and to make a point on another issue I think people tend to overlook), I'll refer to Inspiral, which I think might have directly hinted at this...
(Remember that the sun is also a metaphor: a thing said beautifully, winnowed down to poetry, when the truth is too vast to put in words at all.)
All of these are false, for metaphor simplifies as the knife does. It pares incalculable concepts into shapes your wrinkly little brains can comprehend. The weight of billions and the simple curve of a planet give you pause, and how then are you to be expected to grasp the forces that created your nth-removed creator?
The Winnower itself (no objections on how it's actually the Witness catfishing us please) places particular emphasis on metaphor (basically a linguistic symbol) as a simplification of inconceivably complex concepts into forms our little monkey brains can manage... and poetry. "A thing said beautifully." Aside from explaining why it seems so fond of metaphor in general, this might tie into another Inspiral entry, the one narrated by Eris.
…I digress. There were times, deep in that dark pit, when I thought: Ah, Sai means to break left. And then she would, knives like lightning, as true as if she herself had told me she would. Or: Ah, there is Omar, beside me, and though he was not, his presence rang comforting in my ears like struck metal.Synergy, I thought. The closeness that combat creates. We were pinned together in the dark, and so we learned to read each other perfectly, for to do otherwise would have been to die.To die sooner.Anecdata? Perhaps. Always the quiet voice that says to temper my expectations, that it is wishful thinking to imagine that they lie beside my heart, instead of Nightmares floating in my wake. But in all this time, all of this lingering, I am surer of what I felt then. Not only necessity; not only the edge of the blade.I know more of Darkness now. It is not violence. It is something more: something that hums and flows and resonates, knife or song by equal measure.
After recounting how she started to mentally synergize with her fireteam in the Darkness of the Moon, Eris concludes that the Darkness is not just
the violence of the Sword Logic, but something more. "Knife or song by equal measure.
" A "song" being no more or less intrinsic to the Darkness than the Sword Logic isn't that far removed from "poetry" being winnowed down from less organized information. So I argue that the root of this mental synergy Eris experienced, this "something more" from which song and knife both stem... is reduction again. Reduction of the barriers between Eris's mind and her teammates', I would guess, and the same thing on a larger scale is probably how the Ecumene utilized the Darkness. Instead of slamming together countless different species of literally astronomical differences in biologies and histories and hoping for the best, they used the Darkness to "gloss"... to refine... to winnow all the wildly divergent perceptions and values into a common medium through which all partaking could see through each other's 'eyes' (literally or otherwise) and relate to one another.
Take all that in aggregate, and it seems to me that the Darkness's psychic aspects are neither 'deeper' in the Darkness than the violent, Sword-adjacent aspects nor entirely removed from how the Darkness was presented before Lightfall. Rather, both are just outgrowths of its truly fundamental nature as reduction, whether that reduction is absolute in pursuit of the Final Shape or measured for the purposes of psychic unions like the Ecumene.
TL;DR - I propose that consciousness in Destiny derives from the Darkness, as a paracausal embodiment of the user illusion
principle, reducing the mathematics that form the cosmos objectively into the semiotics and qualia through which most intelligent beings (excluding the Vex) perceive it subjectively. And that further reduction of the differences in consciousness between individuals is the mechanism behind the Darkness's constructive uses.
submitted by SBDovah
to DestinyLore [link] [comments]
2023.05.29 04:51 largelawattorney The End, Ken
Shiv is the Ramsay Bolton of Succession. The absolute worst.
It should have been Ken that got the last vote and surprised everyone by voting the deal through as one last knife in his dad’s back and a recognition that the company was BS. Shiv did not deserve that at all. And ending with Kendall on that bench was atrocious because he could have either been considering the end of himself or gone on to be a good dad, free from the chains his dad put him in when he was seven years old. The finale was an absolute disservice to his character.
I’m also stunned how many people like Tom and are happy for him - he embodies everything wrong with corporate America. Ill equipped for the job, takes no meaningful positions or risks on anything ever, and brown noses his way to the top. It makes sense that he won in the end (because those are the type of people that get those positions), but I’m shocked people were rooting for him.
submitted by largelawattorney
to SuccessionTV [link] [comments]
2023.05.29 04:51 FewAge3025 How Many times does Huey say “Nigga” in entirety of The Boondocks
Time to binge the show and count!
submitted by FewAge3025
to theboondocks [link] [comments]
2023.05.29 04:51 lostgypsy123 The Verdant Dynasty
A call to adventure...
A call echoes from the labyrinth of towering trees. From the harsh savannah to the necrotic swamplands. Within this harsh climate lurks wonderments and beacons of hope speckled across the antagonistic backdrop. The leafy canopy looming aloft, to the distant crooning of wildlife, paints a vivid image of life thriving within the Darwinian tussle. The residents of this land are hardy folk—a people of enriched culture and unique perspectives. And tucked from prying eyes remain the delipidated carcasses of former empires. Grand structures that are now gradually being swallowed up by nature.
The ambiance is one of hope marred by the conflicts of yesteryear. Here the stories of many are interwoven and intersect organically. An original world where even the NPCs are people, and the characters one might make are forged via play and development. The stories and legacy of current and former writers culminate in a grand narrative that fuels every facet of the universe. Where consequences, both beneficial and dire, have refashioned the history and trajectory of the provinces.
So come cradle within the branches. Surrender to the call that has lured many a great writer before you. And see what influence you will leave behind for others to follow. For here, everything is earned, nothing is given, and no one can strip away what is merited.
So, what are you guys?
We're an original world with a long history. We've bounded between rp mediums and weathered many of their expirations.
Where is the prompt?
There is none because it's a universe. People create characters and live their life and role within the setting. Their efforts then change the world for better or for worse. So there isn't one prompt as the saga is continuous. It's a collection of stories from grand to small that make it up.
What are your rules?
No godmodding/ metagaming.
Read the lore.
Read your partner's post.
Respect one another
And have fun.
What will you guys not allow?
Our magic system is straightforward. There is a degree of groundedness to it. We won't accept magic that violates the mechanics of the universe.
Not reading the lore.
You can't just add a race, as that would alter decades of IC stories and development. What's there is there. A race coming out of these advanced nation-states' woodworks is too far-fetched. It would be like heading down a different street on Earth and finding mole people with a large empire or city.
How do I get approved?
Submit a sheet. We have a template up, but it isn't required. And then a mod will look over it to ensure it doesn't violate the setting.
How do I gain stuff?
Through play. Want to be a better warrior, do warrior things. No amount of bar hopping will make you a better fighter. This applies to all roles.
Is there more to the world?
Yes, but the other areas don't matter. As such, they don't exist in the eyes of those who inhabit the universe. A way to break this down quickly is to use North and South America. They existed, but they didn't hold any relevance to ancient China. So writing up America and trying to force it in will be denied. It isn't fair to those who have worked to get where they are or are currently working. And the lore presented is a summary. More information will be provided if needed.
What if I can't write much?
We all start somewhere. Additionally, RP is not a competition; it is collaborative. Discord Link The lore (Summary)
submitted by lostgypsy123
to DiscordGroupRP [link] [comments]
2023.05.29 04:50 Idkidkidk135689 Does anyone just isolate themselves after not being that way years ago and not wanna deal with anyone anymore?
I used to be so much happier, even a year ago it felt different. I’ve gone through so much splitting and so many betrayals, especially romantic, the last several years and the more it happens, the more introverted I get and not want to be around anyone. I would so much rather spend a night at home by myself being cozy, watching my favorite show and cooking my favorite meal alone than go out with friends, not that I have a lot in my city but the close friends I do have either live outside of my city or outside of my state. A part of me knows I’m isolating myself, but I think another part is who I’m surrounding myself with as well, but none of my true close friends live anywhere near me and I’m sure if I did I would go out with them and come home feeling happy and content.
I see people posting about going out with friends, traveling, going to the beach etc and I get such FOMO but the second a friend asks me to go out I never want to go and when I do I feel so out of place and want to be back home again. I never used to be like this. I used to be such a social butterfly and go out and never have this problem but the more I get hurt the more I don’t want to be around anyone.
I know this isn’t really a BPD thing, but I feel like it’s heightened times a thousand because of how much I split and go through the black and white thinking. I also have quiet BPD and have such a hard time with speaking up about anything, especially saying no so if I don’t go out I feel guilty.
My friend who I hadn’t seen in over a month wanted to get together yesterday and I was excited to have a girls day and see her, but at the last minute she asked if her boyfriend could come and I didn’t want to be rude and say no, but I just wanted a girls day so he did and I was miserable but tried to keep a happy face on and didn’t want to make either of them feel bad. Her boyfriend’s best friend also ghosted me and screwed me over a few months ago so that was a fat reminder on top of being a third wheel and feeling lonely and not good enough. All I could think about was how I wanted to go home.
I know this post was all over the place so I apologize but it’s something that’s been on my mind for awhile and I’m genuinely curious if anyone feels or has gone through the same thing or something similar. Any advice would be appreciated as well on how you’ve handled it. Thank you all so much in advance I’m so grateful for this community and kind people
submitted by Idkidkidk135689
to BPD [link] [comments]
2023.05.29 04:49 emilxxxcant Seeking (F28) advice about a person (M29) I was seeing
I was introduced to a guy about 3.5 months ago, and we started texting but took things very slowly and healthily, meaning that we didn’t text each other 24/7 or during work hours. Then, we started texting more and more and finally met up. I thought the date went well, and he expressed the same. We started actually texting even more so. Then, we had a second date. Same thing, and our texts got even more intimate. Third date was a bit awkward because I got really nervous but I was pretty open about it. I ended up sleeping over but we didn’t sleep with each other. We continued to text a lot and started having more calls and FaceTime talks. Honestly, our convos made it seem like we were dating dating (e.g., telling me he misses me and how he wants to explore so many places with me and even making plans with me in the future). We then had a fourth date and he ended up sleeping over afterwards/still we didn’t sleep with each other. After this date, the warmth and frequency of his texts changed. I finally asked him about the energy shift and he said that he really likes me and that, being honest, he bumped into someone from his past a couple of months ago and they then reached out at the time. He said he never responded and didn’t think it would impact him talking to me but then it kept weighing on him and leaving him with mixed emotions. He said that he thinks that the mixed emotions have kept him from fully connecting with me and he realizes now it’s not fair to me and that I deserve someone who can reciprocate from the get go and he isn’t sure when or if he could get to that point with how he’s feeling in the moment. We continued to talk where expressed that he has seen a future with us and just couldn’t understand why he couldn’t give me his all wholeheartedly towards the end despite me having everything and he thinks his hesitation stems from the mixed emotions.
To take a step back, while we were seeing each other, I asked him about the timeline of his past relationship, and he said he had never been in one and has dated around but never been in anything serious because he was in school and couldn’t really commit. I explained that I only asked to make sure he was emotionally available and to see if he was still in contact with anyone from his past, and that I ultimately think the past is the past. He asked about mine and then we moved on from the convo.
We both ended on a good note and told each other that we liked each other and blah blah lol. I told him that I’d be removing him off of socials and keeping no contact and didn’t want him to think it was out of spite and I do think very highly of him. And that I was only removing him so I could fully heal and move forward. I’ve also told him that I usually move forward and don’t look back. He told me that he’s always there for me if I ever need him and that I’m truly special to him.
Granted it’s only been 3 days, I really miss him, and I sort of want to reach out. As cheesy as it sounds and even if he wasn’t able to feel the same right now, I really haven’t felt what I felt for him for anyone else. Also, we have never had any other issue. I obviously don’t think that there is anything to work out here like immediately because he needs time to figure out his headspace but I do wonder if like maybe there is any room to talk about it. Like if he does take time to think about what he feels about the past situation and doesn’t end up contacting her, if we could try again if I haven’t fully moved on. Or another thing is I understand his POV like I understand that it is even harder when you’re starting something new and it reminds you of how like things were past that new stage and just like 100 percent comfortable.
Any advice? If the advice isn’t just move on and leave it alone, how would you approach a convo with him again about all of this?
submitted by emilxxxcant
to relationship_advice [link] [comments]
2023.05.29 04:48 UnknownCookie7 I don’t play Kiriko nearly as often as I used to
When I started playing Overwatch back in October, Kiriko was all I ever played. She was just so much fun, she’s the reason I fell in love with the game in the first place. Yeah, I think we can all agree she was totally busted looking back closer to her release but I find myself rarely playing her nowadays. I didn’t mind the nerfs to her ultimate (which were very necessary) or even her suzu, but the one that really turned me off instant locking her was the change they made to her healing output. With close to a 20% reduction in overall healing, it made playing her feel like a watered down version. Don’t get me wrong, she’s still a good support and offers unbelievable utility, I just don’t personally find her as fun to play anymore. Since she’s not as reliable with her healing output, she can’t work with as many comps as before, which also isn’t necessarily a bad thing because you can make the argument you don’t want a support in the game that is a must pick no matter the situation. I guess I’m just saying she feels different to play than before that change and I enjoy playing other supports much more now because of it. Im curious if that change to her has impacted how often any of you play her. Also, do you think she is in a good place right now? And if not, if you were in charge of balancing at Blizzard, what would you change about her kit?
submitted by UnknownCookie7
to kirikomains [link] [comments]
2023.05.29 04:48 crystalbomb8 It’s getting hard again
It still hurts knowing we won’t be together in the future like how I had pictured in my head so many times.
submitted by crystalbomb8
to u/crystalbomb8 [link] [comments]
2023.05.29 04:47 rouge-raven My theory about Helaemond
To preface this, I am putting my own personal feelings aside about the ship. This is not really a personal argument against it, but more of a problem I see in this creations about this ship as a Helaena fan and why I think this problem is so prevalent.
In regards to the some of the works that have appeared around this ship, my running theory is that a good part of the Helaemond fanbase uses Helaena as a self insert for their shipping with Aemond instead of actually looking at her as a character. And I think that this self-inserting into Helaena is what makes it so popular. I am sure there are fans who actually care about Helaena but there is also a good few who just use her name and lack of canon details to force her into this weird damsel in distress caricature regardless of how little it fits her character. They don't like Helaemond because of the characters involved, they like it because Helaena is a blank canvas they can throw their own feelings and claim cannon on.
While a good amount of fault can be given to the cannon material as it does not focus on Helaena as much as her siblings and leaves a lot to sought and created in order to make her more three-dimensional, this doesn't excuse all of it. We do have some basic character traits about Helaena that can be used to create a general understanding of her that many fans have further expanded on, but a lot of people openly ignore that to make their content, and it is just strange to see these people claim to be Helaena fans but then write her completely out of character.
submitted by rouge-raven
to HOTDGreens [link] [comments]
2023.05.29 04:47 Plenty_Honey5606 Recent vlog, addressing our concerns
Anyone notice how in her recent vlog (27/5) she talked about a few of the things we talk about on here? She talked about not always taking the best care of Sterling, saying she just gets so busy & why she has so many white claws in her fridge, friends come over with them & leave them there. I just thought it was so funny she addressed both of them so nonchalantly but it felt like a “I see y’all taking about these things, so imma just brush your concerns under the rug by giving half-assed excuses”
submitted by Plenty_Honey5606
to maiphammy [link] [comments]
2023.05.29 04:47 JLGoodwin1990 If you ever think you see something peering at you from around a corner, ignore it
Have you ever had the experience of swearing you saw something at the edge of your vision, peering at you from around a corner before? I’m fairly sure a good chunk of people have, maybe even you reading this right now. Regardless of whether you’re in a crowded area such as a mall or school, or home by yourself, you’ve more than likely had that strange sensation of being watched, usually accompanied by a slight shiver down your spine. You’ll snap your head up from whatever it is you’re doing, or whoever you’re talking to. And nothing will be there. But, you always swear that, at the very edge of your vision, you saw something. A slight blur, as if something was there, but seemed to anticipate your move, and pulled back out of sight. I’m fairly certain most of you just end up shaking it off. You shake your head, telling yourself that nothing was there, and go back to what you were doing.
That’s a good thing. Because it’s what keeps you safe. It’s what keeps you alive.
Like many of you, for years, I always wrote seeing the slight blur at the edge of my sight off as a trick of my eyes. “Being so focused on one particular area that the rest of your vision goes fuzzy” as my mother once told me when I, as a child, told her I’d seen something at the doorway to my bedroom. And as I grew older, I simply took it as fact, the way every child takes their parent’s wisdom to heart. And once I became an adult, I simply waved it away completely.
That was, until one night.
You see, as a thirty-something year old bachelor who makes just above the line of adequate pay, I live by myself in a small, one bedroom apartment. It means having to live farther out from the city where I work, but I prefer living alone over not having to make the rather long drive to and from work every day. And, because my free time during the day is close to zero, I also am a bit of a night owl. This particular night, about three and a half weeks ago, I was up late, sitting at my kitchen table with my laptop out in front of me. I was surfing the net, looking for good deals on EBay for a new DVD/VCR combo since my old one broke, when the feeling came over me. The small, but noticeable shiver shot up my spine, and at the upper edge of my vision, just below where my hair began to drift into my eyes, I saw it.
It was a black and silver blur. At least, that’s what it looked like to me. I lifted my head quickly, looking towards the corner I’d seen it. My kitchen is in the back of the apartment, and where the table is set up, I was looking back out into the living room. The bedroom also sits next to the kitchen, and the wall separating the two stretches out a bit, causing a rather large blind spot from where I sat. Of course, when I looked up, there was nothing there. For a few more seconds, I simply sat, staring at the corner. Nothing moved. There was no sound except for the quiet whine of my laptop’s fan, and the hum of the fridge. I snorted. Really, Eddie? You’re jumping at shadowy blurs now? What are you, eight years old again? And with a shake of my head, I went back to the computer screen.
The hours seemed to pass by at an accelerated pace, and to my surprise, when I checked the clock at the bottom right of my laptop screen, the time said quarter to three in the morning. “Holy crap, I stayed up too friggin’ late!” I whispered to myself. I’d barely be getting four or five hours of sleep. And so, with a yawn, I shut my computer down and put it back into its carrying bag. As I stood up, though, a slight feeling of apprehension wiggled its way to the forefront of my mind. I lifted my head from zipping up the bag and again stared at the corner. This time there was nothing there. No blur at all. Recalling what my mother had told me years ago, I stood up and slowly stepped into the center of the kitchen, where I could see around the corner. I felt a small pang of embarrassment at the relief that washed over me as I saw nothing was there.
“What next, you gonna start believing in the Easter Bunny and Santa Claus again?” I muttered to myself. And with that, I entered my bedroom, shutting the door behind me and climbing into bed. For a moment, the image of the blur danced behind my eyelids. And then the sandman overtook me, plunging me into a deep and dreamless sleep.
The next day passed by like I was wading through quicksand. Of course, it likely had to do with how tired I was. But I got through the day, and soon enough, I was back home. This time, I resolved to get to bed before midnight. One AM at the latest. So I didn’t go on my computer. Instead, I watched some TV, and indulged myself in a few online matches in Battlefield 1. Soon enough, the clock sitting next to the TV displayed 12:35 in big red numbers. Alright, time for bed, I thought, and stood up, shutting off the TV and Xbox. I decided that I would get myself a drink before bed, and moved to the fridge. Opening it, I pulled a pitcher of juice out, and grabbing a glass from a nearby cabinet, poured myself some. The cold liquid felt good sliding down my throat, and I let out a relieved sigh. For a moment, I closed my eyes. Apart from the sound of a diesel truck passing by outside, and the ticking of the clock over the sink, all was silent. And I loved it. I placed the glass in the sink to wash tomorrow, and turned to take the pitcher back to the fridge.
And nearly dropped it at what I saw. As I turned around, I had a clear view across the kitchen and living room toward the small alcove where my front door sat. And for just a second, I saw the same black and silver blur, pulling back out of sight from the edge of my vision. Except this time, I know it wasn’t just a trick of my vision, or a strand of hair flashing in front of my face. “Hey!” I reflexively yelled out. I didn’t expect any response, and I didn’t get any. But now I knew for certain. There was something, or someone there. I felt my pulse rapidly quicken, and my heart began to beat like a drum against my chest. Fucking great, did someone decide to break in and try to burgle my apartment, of all places tonight? I looked around quickly for something to defend myself. My eyes fell upon the block holding all my kitchen knives, and moving quickly, I pulled the largest one out and turned back towards the entryway.
There was no movement now, but I noticed a change in the atmosphere. Gone was the simple, vacant air the apartment always held. Now, it seemed to contain a charge to it. As if seeing the figure had been something they hadn’t planned on. As if I weren’t supposed to have seen it. Probably figured I’d already be in bed. Well, they have a massive surprise coming their way. I cleared my throat. “You back there” I called out simply. Again, there was no reply. I spoke again. “Look, I saw you there peeking around the corner of the entryway. The jig is up. I don’t want a fight right now, so, I’ll make you a deal. If you turn around right now and leave, I won’t call the cops on you, and I won’t come at you with this knife. Just, go find someone else to rob, okay?”
Still, there was silence. But the tension in the room seemed to have racked up more than a few notches at my words. I waited for a minute, feeling my temper begin to flare. Does the dumbass seriously believe that if he stays quiet, I’ll believe he’s not there and go to bed or something? It wouldn’t be a surprise; the people who usually broke into houses and apartments in my neighborhood were usually strung out on the drug of choice for the week, or, in all truthfulness, simply not that bright. I let out an annoyed growl. “If I have to come over there to get, it’s not gonna end well for you” I said. At six feet even, and in good shape, I could easily take on whoever it was.
The silence was almost deafening. Okay, the hell with this, man. I strode quickly across the room, the knife held out in front of me in a vice like grip. I stopped for a moment, drawing in all my strength and reflexes. For a moment, though, an odd sensation seemed to wash over me like a wave. To my surprise, it was a bolt of fear. But, fear of what? Yes, it was a bit dangerous to about to confront a cornered intruder, but fear shouldn’t be one of the experienced emotions. Shaking it away, I put all the muscle into my legs, and leapt around the corner.
There was nobody there.
For a moment, I simply stood there, feeling dumbfounded. “Uhhh….what?” I blurted out. I knew for a fact I’d seen someone there. It hadn’t been a trick of my eyes. And I hadn’t heard the front door open. In fact, looking down at it now, I saw the little knob on the door handle was, in fact, twisted into the locked position. As I stared down at it, a sudden, huge shiver rushed up my spine, combined with the feeling of being stared at intensely. In fact, it almost felt as though whoever were doing the staring, were almost directly behind me-shit!
On instinct, I whirled around, slashing out with the knife as hard as I could. But again, there was nothing. No one stood behind me. The oddest thing, though, was that as soon as I spun around, the feeling of eyes boring into the back of my skull ceased. As if the watcher had simply blinked out of existence the moment I turned. But the tension in the apartment didn’t go away. In fact, it almost seemed to intensify. And it kept me on edge. Enough to the point that I searched the entire apartment. I went into the bathroom, drawing back the shower curtain. I went into my bedroom and opened up the sliding doors to the closet. I even opened up both closets in the living room, pulling out all the coats and boxes someone could hide behind. But I found nothing. No trace of anybody. Even still, though, when I went to bed, I locked the door to my bedroom behind me, just in case. And I slept with the knife on my bedside table.
The next morning, when I awoke, the feeling had vanished from the apartment. It was almost as if the daylight had banished the tension filled aura away, and I was glad for it. Along with the fact that I had a full day of work ahead of me. And so, with a final look around, I locked the front door behind me, climbed into my old, but well taken care of Mitsubishi Starion, and made the two and a half hour drive into the city for work. The day passed by without much fuss, aside from a mandatory team meeting my dickhead boss decided to impose on us during our lunch break. The monotony calmed me down somewhat, and I began to mentally tease myself for how bent out of shape I’d gotten last night. I even decided to tell some of the guys at the water cooler about it.
Everyone, of course, had a good laugh over it. “Well, Ed, if I ever need someone to slice away at the dark emptiness of my house, I’ll be sure to give you a call!” Mark, one of my coworkers joked, causing everyone, including myself, to guffaw some more. The joking shoved it completely out of my mind, and before I knew it, the evening had arrived. I packed up my belongings back into the car and made the journey back home, still chuckling a bit to myself and humming along to the songs playing on the car’s radio. As I pulled into my apartment building’s parking lot and into my space at close to ten at night, however, I saw something which tore away that relaxed, relieved emotion from me like it’d been a loved one in the grip of a tsunami.
My complex is set up in a U formation with two floors, sort of similar to how an older built motel looks. My apartment was the second one on the top floor, and from where I sat in my car, I could look up and see the living room window of my place between the slats of the walkway’s railing. As I always did, when I left, I’d twisted shut the white venetian blinds so nobody walking past the window could look into my place.
Someone was peering down at me from between the blinds. From between my blinds.
I felt my blood turn to ice as I saw the obvious parting in the middle of them, signifying someone was pulling down on a section of them. And then doubly so when they, just as quickly, snapped back into position. Shitttt, I mentally hissed. I fumbled around in my coat pockets, looking for my cell phone. I let out a groan as I suddenly realized I’d forgotten it when I’d left home that morning. Which meant it was up there. With them. “Shit” I hissed again, out loud this time. I gazed around for a moment at the darkened windows of the other units. But I knew none of my neighbors would be of any help to me. Long gone were the days of neighbors looking out for each other; they would, inevitably, tell me to either find a way to call the cops myself, or straight up tell me to go fuck myself, that it wasn’t their problem. Which, unless I wanted to drive straight to my local police station, over twenty minutes away, the only other option was…to go in myself.
Hissing through gritted teeth, I pulled the door handle and kicked the door open, letting the chilly night air flood into the car’s interior. I reached down and yanked on the trunk release before climbing out and slamming the door. Crossing to it, I pulled the glass hatch up and fumbled around inside for a moment, before withdrawing a tire iron from the mess of crap cluttering up the trunk. Slamming the hatch closed, I took a deep breath, then, leaving my car’s engine running in case I needed to make a quick getaway, I took the stairs to the top floor two at a time. A moment later, I was standing at the head of the landing, staring at the Tweety-Bird yellow painted door of my apartment. My heart pounded in my chest as I took a step forward, reaching out slowly and gripping the handle in one hand. I gave it a small twist to see if it would turn.
But it stayed in place, showing that the door was still locked. Or, whoever’s in there locked it behind them. Swallowing a bit, I reached into my pants pocket for my house keys with my free hand. Pulling them out, I slid them as quietly as possible into the lock in the center of the doorknob. I took a deep breath, knowing as soon as I twisted the key, the doorknob would turn with it as well. “God, please don’t let me get jumped as soon as I step inside” I quietly whispered towards the dark sky. I let out the deep breath, then raised the tire iron over my head and twisted the key.
The knob turned, and I immediately pushed the door open. It swung inwards, before hitting the wall with a soft clunk. The porch light cast a long, narrow shaft of light into the dark room beyond, reflecting off my flat screen TV on the far side of the living room. Aside from that, though, the place was as dark and silent as a tomb. My pulse quickened as I slowly reached inside, my hand searching for the light switch. Part of my feared that, as I blindly searched, I’d suddenly feel a vice like grip seize my wrist and pull me into the dark. The mental image sent a shiver of fear through me, just as my fingers found the plastic switch. Flicking it on, the living room suddenly became awash in the bright overhead light. Still holding the tire iron over my head, I took a tentative step inside. The atmosphere in here had changed again. Gone was the tense one which had accompanied seeing…whoever the other night. In its place was….an almost threatening one. And realizing it set me even farther on edge.
Moving quickly, I leaned around the corner, giving me a glimpse of the kitchen beyond. Both it, and the living room were empty, from initial appearances, anyways. But that still left the bathroom, and the kitchen. Something caught my eye, however, which filled me with relief. My cell phone still sat where I’d left it, in the middle of the living room coffee table. I moved slowly, trying to stay as quiet as possible so whoever was hidden wouldn’t realize I was going for my phone and bum rush me. I held my breath as I passed by the half open doors of both my bathroom and bedroom, stepping around the couch and picking up my phone. I decided right there and then, that I’d step back outside and call the cops. There was a fine line between being courageous, and being suicidally stupid, and searching this place on my own, with just a tire iron to defend myself, especially knowing someone was hiding somewhere in here, was firmly on the latter side of that line.
I turned to begin walking quickly back to the open front door. But something stopped me. Something which made me freeze. There was a small section of eggshell white wall between the door to one of my closets, and the bathroom door. Something had been written there. No, not written, I realized. It had been scratched into the wall. My eyes flashed over the three words etched into the paint and plaster. Videre nos potest. My head swam with confusion, trying to place what language it was. That was when I felt my heart almost stop in my chest, my breath along with it.
Out of the left corner of my vision, I saw the door to my bedroom had slowly, but noticeably swung open a bit. That wasn’t what had caused my heart to skip a beat, though. It was seeing the black and silver blur again. Ohhhhh, shit. Before the thought had finished in my head, I was dashing for the door. Out of the corner of my vision, there was a sudden blur of movement as the black and silver figure came flying out of the room. It never made a sound, though. I dodged it, somehow, and flew around the corner, snatching the doorknob in my free hand and yanking the door shut behind me. Twisting the keys to the right to lock the door again, I tore them from the lock and thundered back down the stairs, yanking the door to my car open and crashing into the driver’s seat. Slamming the door shut and locking it, I dropped the tire iron and fumbled with my phone.
As the voice of the emergency dispatcher came on the other end of the line, and I stumbled through explaining what had happened, I kept my gaze locked through the windshield on the front door and the living room window. I swear I saw the blinds part again as I heard the wail of the police sirens approaching.
When the police arrived, I jumped out of my car and quickly explained what had happened. They took my house keys from me and with their pistols drawn, climbed quickly up the steps to my place. With neighbors opening their doors and parting their blinds to see what was happening, they unlocked the door and quickly entered. A few minutes later, they both reappeared and waved for me to come up and join them. “I’m sorry sir, but whoever it was, they’re gone” one of them said to me. He then showed me that the window in the back of the apartment, which was in the back of the kitchen and opened out onto a main road, had been opened, the mosquito screen having been cut to allow someone to jump out. I stared out and down at the two story drop. It would hurt to jump from this height, but it’s doable, I thought. The cops again did a sweep of the apartment, turning the entire place upside down with me there, and again, found no one. They both promised to stay the night outside, to keep an eye on the place in case the person attempted to try and come back, and would make sure an officer was posted outside for the next week or so. It made me feel more than a bit better.
“What about the writing scratched into the wall?” I asked them, pointing to it. The first officer shrugged. “I honestly don’t know, sir” he said, giving me an apologetic look, “That’s a language I’ve never seen before” That’s when the second spoke up. “It’s Latin” he said simply. We both looked at him. He was staring at the writing with a bit of a confused, if not apprehensive look on his face. “But what freaking low level criminal knows Latin?” he murmured quietly, more to himself than us. “Well, what does it say?” I asked him. For a few seconds, he didn’t answer, then he finally turned and looked at me.
“He can see us. That’s, roughly, what it says”
I felt a massive chill shoot up my spine at his words, though I couldn’t understand why. Not at the time.
As promised, the officers watched over the apartment the rest of the night. And for the next week, there was always at least one cop car sitting outside. It was also, thankfully, quiet that next week. I was almost able to feel completely calm, putting the frightening experience out of my mind and allowing my life to regain a bit of normalcy. I didn’t feel any sensation of being watched. One thing I did do, though, was type the Latin words into Google, in an attempt to see if anything came up. But nothing did. I decided to push the last remnants out of my conscious mind. And as the weekend came, I looked forward to sitting on the couch, playing video games all night, and having a bottle of Hypnotiq to myself. Saturday night, I played until almost one in the morning, before stumbling my drunk ass to the bed. I passed out almost as soon as my head hit the pillow.
I’m honestly not sure what woke me up. But when I slid my eyes open, it was still to darkness. I felt my head begin to spin, showing that I wasn’t fully sober yet. I shot a look at the bright red glowing numbers of the clock on the bedside table next to my head. 3:30AM. Ugh, what the hell? Do I have to piss? What woke me u-
Everything stopped. My mind froze mid-thought, and my heart fluttered in my chest. My breath hitched in my chest as my eyes adjusted to the dark, staring across the room. I was looking at my bedroom closet, which, when I’d fallen asleep, I’d looked over and seen it closed. But now, as I stared, I realized the sliding right door had been pulled back some. A chill ran through me. And then it was replaced by a bone chilling shiver of fear as my eyes locked on to something else. Something which stared at me from around the edge of the half open closet door.
It was the black and silver blur. Except this time, it wasn’t a full on blur. I’m not sure whether it was the darkness or the alcohol still flowing through my veins, but…I could see it a bit more clearly now. I couldn’t see much. Just what looked like two large, very dark eyes, glaring at me. I felt frozen in place, fear quite literally paralyzing me to the bed. As I lay there, my eyes widened to the size of saucers, I slowly became aware of something else. Something which I’ll never forget, which I can still hear in the silence. It was whispering. It was a soft, hissing voice, sounding as grating as sandpaper, but it almost seemed to be growing in intensity. As if it knew I was awake and was staring at it. And it was not even remotely happy about it. The words were indistinguishable at first, but as the voice grew louder, the words became clear. But they weren’t words I knew. Or a language I knew.
“Tolle qui nos videre potest. Tolle qui nos videre potest. Tolle…qui nos videre potest!” I recognized some of the words as the same as the words written on my wall. It was speaking in Latin. The voice grew angrier and angrier, turning from a hiss into almost a demonic growl. And then, it went deadly silent. It almost seemed as though the entire world had gone dead silent, as if everything were being sucked out of the world.
That’s when I saw the hand reach up from underneath the bed to grab onto the sheets, less than a foot from my face. A hand which more resembled a claw, tipped with five razor sharp fingernails. There’s more than one….and it’s under my fucking bed!
Seeing that hand…that claw reaching up from under the bed broke the paralyzing hold that had come over me. I flew up in bed, flinging the sheets up and forwards and letting out an involuntary scream. Instantly, there seemed to be a world of motion in the bedroom. Black and silver blurs seemed to appear from everywhere. From the closet, from under the bed. Even from inside my armoire I used to store candy, books and CDs. And they were all coming for me.
But I was already moving, practically flying for my open bedroom door. Behind me, I caught the blurs following after me. They were terrifyingly fast, but they stayed silent. Silent, that is, except for the mantra they all suddenly began to angrily whisper. The same words I’d heard the one in the closet angrily hiss. “Tolle qui nos videre potest!” they chanted, just loud enough for me to hear. But not enough for anyone else in the complex to. I ran through the bedroom door, grabbing it and slamming it shut behind me. A moment later, I felt the push from the other side as whatever the things were attempted to force it open. Looking around, I spied a kitchen chair within reach and grabbed it, forcing it under the handle to block the door.
I knew it wouldn’t hold for long, though. I could hear the creatures practically throwing themselves at the door. I used the time I had to grab my computer bag, along with the clothes I’d left strewn on my living room floor and my cell phone. I’d just snatched my car keys from their hook, when I realized they’d gone silent. The assault on the door stopped. For a split second, I felt a wave of relief. And then I saw something out of the corner of my eye from the kitchen. My blood turned to ice as I realized the cabinet doors under the sink were beginning to open. And that demonic growl of a mantra was beginning to pour out from under it. So was my bathroom door. And both closets. “Oh, fuck me” I whimpered, then dashed for my door, snatching up my sneakers as they rushed out from their new hidey holes.
I unlocked and threw the door open, dashing out into the night and yanking it shut behind me. Bolting down the steps, I jammed the key into the door of my car and unlocked it. I piled into the driver’s seat and yanked the door shut, slamming down on the lock button. Forcing the key into the ignition and twisting it, the engine roared to life. I knew I should simply call the cops, but I knew at this point, if I did, when they arrived, they’d all have disappeared. Maybe even make it look like another person had jumped out the window again They're THAT smart. Instead, I jammed the shifter into reverse and peeled out of the parking lot. As I left, I saw the blinds part again. As they watched me go.
I haven’t been back to my apartment in weeks. I drove all through the night, fighting back the waves of nausea from the alcohol still in my system until I made it to the city where I work. I rented a motel room, and ever since then, I’ve been staying there. I figured I could just eventually have movers go and collect my things from the apartment, and give my thirty day notice. There was no way I was ever going back there.
I thought I would be safe in the city. I thought I would be safe anywhere else but my apartment. That they were bound to the place.
I was wrong. So very wrong.
Because I’ve started seeing them everywhere now. I’ve seen them while out in crowded places such as the mall or Wal-Mart. I’ve seen them in my coworker’s houses when I’m invited over by them as they tell me they’re concerned about how I’m beginning to act. I’m even seeing them at work. Peering at me from around the corners of hallways, from behind the water cooler. I’ve even caught them glaring at me from around the corner of my office cubicle. They whisper that horrible Latin mantra to themselves, now added with evil chuckles. And whisper it to me. I ended up entering the phrase into Google Translate, to understand what they were saying. But wish I never had. Because knowing meaning of the words fills me with an existential dread and terror I’ve never felt before.
Take away he who can see us
You need to listen to me now. You, reading this account I’m posting. I don’t know what these creatures are. I wish I did, because then, I might have some way of fighting back against them. I don’t even know what they fully look like. I’ve only seen their eyes. And their clawed hands. The only thing I can deduce, is that they are incalculably old. Centuries old. Maybe even eons. I now understand that those blurs I saw all throughout my life, from the corner of my vision, were them. They’ve lived alongside us for all of humanity’s existence, staying just out of sight. They like it that way. They don’t like us humans knowing about them.
But I know others, not just myself, have likely seen them.
How many strange cases of people disappearing in their homes, with all the doors and windows locked from the inside have you heard about. I know I’ve heard more than a few. And I think I know what happened to them. They saw these creatures. And when they realized the people could see them? They came for them. They wore them down, mentally and physically. Like they’re doing to me now. I’m afraid to fall asleep. Afraid I’ll wake up to see them right in front of me. I feel so weak now. I couldn’t fight them off if I tried. They know that. They knew that about the others. And that’s when they dragged them away….to God only knows where.
I know I'm going to find out soon enough.
Because all of today, they’ve been getting closer. I caught one trying to grab my leg under my desk. That wasn’t the scariest encounter I’ve had. The worst was driving back to the motel. Looking in the rear view mirror of my Starion. And seeing one of them glaring at me from just behind the rear seat. It caused me to nearly crash into a telephone pole. I’ve locked myself in my motel room, which is where I’m writing this. I don’t have much time left. They’re beginning to poke their heads out from everywhere in here. Multiple have popped their heads up from under the bed, watching me frantically typing this out on my laptop. And they’re all laughing at me. Today is when they're going to take me. They know I know that. I can’t do anything more now. I can’t run from them anymore. I’m too tired. Too weak.
But I can do one final thing. I can warn you. I can post this account of this here as a warning. I know for a fact most of you won’t believe me. And that’s fine. It may even be what saves you in the end.
But please, listen to me when I say this. If you ever think you see something peering at you from around a corner? If you ever catch a glimpse of a black and silver blur disappearing just out of sight? Don’t investigate it. Just ignore it. Tell yourself it’s nothing, and go about with your lives.
Because you don’t ever want them to realize you can see them.
submitted by JLGoodwin1990
to nosleep [link] [comments]
2023.05.29 04:46 Exciting-Chip3431 IM SO CLOSE HELP ME
2023.05.29 04:46 ripnbryy Never been trained
so, I've been working at here in the pharmacy for like almost 2 months now? I'm part time, I only work 2-3 days from the week.
the last month or two I have not been trained by one person At All, not even when I was doing "training" for cashier, no one at all bothered training me and I've guessed most of the way and it's worked for the most part. I've been trying to get the technician license but no one at all even bothers.... training me? all I do is rts, pick ups, putting medication in their numbered box and occasionally drive thru if there's not many people scheduled. I can barely do anything and I always have to refer customers to the drop off where another employee when their medication has been rts'd or on hold.
I used to ask a lot of questions but recently they've been just ignoring me or just not answering my question and go straight to the customepatient and deal with it themselves.
I truly hate just standing there for 10 or so hours every single time I'm scheduled.
I've been to other locations to pick up shifts and it's usually the same thing, I am simply there to be a cashier.
I always ask the manager is there anything else I can do, what else can I learn and she'll just put it off and send me to do the usual, pick ups, drive thru, rts and putting the baggies in their numbered box..
I was just thinking of asking the pharmacy manager or the store manager if I can just be front store? will they accept that? how would I bring this up to the managers ? will they even accept this offer ?
submitted by ripnbryy
to CVS [link] [comments]