I am a 23(very soon 24) year old woman with strong work ethics and morals. This year, however, is weird to me.
I’m a full time masters student and I work 2 times a week, and tend to do a lot of work during the summers. In minimarts, healthcare, restaurant, and social work. I like working with people, and I like being there for people. I started working when I was 17, and have been working the hours I have time to work till now.
This summer is different. I got an offer to work at the same restaurant I worked at last year, only they got new owners. And from the start something seemed off. I was supposed to meet the boss and get to know the new staff, but when I showed up, he wasn’t there. The staff didn’t have time to speak to me, and I only got a “staff document” to write general info about me. Never heard from him. The general manager of the restaurant called me randomly and said I could work the upcoming weekend, and that we could “go over the contract together”. They didn’t want to send me the contract at first, but I insisted I had to see it. Something seemed off.
When looking at the contract I wasn’t gonna be employed as an assistant, I was gonna be a summoning assistant, and I wasn’t given the salary of somebody working in the restaurant, it was the salary for cleaners, which is a lot lower.
This I didn’t feel comfortable with signing, and my so and father thought the same. My mom on the other hand, well she didn’t agree. And I’m not gonna get into the details of that conversation, i don’t want to.
Now I’ve been feeling like shit, and I feel guilty for not accepting the job. I feel guilty for not having a job this summer. I’ve applied for 12 new jobs today, but I feel sick to my stomach. I still work as a support contact two times a week, but it can be a bit unpredictable.
Should I feel guilty, am I a problem?

Hello! I’d like general advice about moving on and re-establishing my relationship or choosing to end it.
My partner (26M) and I (24F) have been living together for 3 years, though we’ve been together for 5. My partner lost his job at the beginning of the year and has been struggling with finding a career in general since then. He was able to find another job 2 months ago but has since then quit, and is now planning on restructuring his career in general, including possibly going back to school and taking some entry level positions in a different field.
He was contributing 60% to all of our shared expenses while I was contributing 40% since I earn significantly less (70k vs 40k) and send a portion of my pay to help support my parents. I took a 2 year gap from college to help support my parents as one lost their job and the other was going through chemo. I planned to return to college last spring but my plans were delayed due to our situation. We resigned the lease when he accepted his previous job offer but now I am committed to paying this lease with little help for another 10 months or with him pulling from savings.
The only sustainable solution to this is that he returns home, where he won’t have to worry about paying bills. I unfortunately don’t have that privilege as my parents live in a small apartment that doesn’t have any spare space as it is.
I am holding a lot of resentment towards him for the decisions we’ve made and I keep feeling that we are holding each other back. I love him and the life we’ve created so much, but I don’t know how to move forward, as I feel drained and disappointed. I feel I’ve made sacrifices to make this work but he couldn’t, and I feel selfish for asking him to.
Is it reparable?

Wanted to say thanks to everyone who has contributed helpful information for ASVAB prep, recruiter guidance, and general tips for going through the entire process from start to finish.
I met my recruiter last Tuesday (May 30) Took my ASVAB the following Monday, and went through MEPS to get medical/sworn-in completed two days later. Booked job after leaving MEPS.
Anyone else shipping out July 11th?

Hey all, have learned a ton from this sub so looking for advice/suggestion
Age: 28 US citizen, 1st gen immigrant. T5 public US uni (non target), Bachelor's only.
Crypto industry has collapsed in the US even more so, esp this week with regulator lawsuits.
Hiring was bad enough with the macro (laid off in Feb).
Rumors more US firms shuttering US ops - zero job stability during recession.
Due to current focus and finances (had a cyberhack due to being in this industry) I do not want to be laid off again in Q4.
Not much luck finding a new role yet but could go back to sales/marketing in prior industry. Tech industry doesn't respect crypto (not a dev anyway), doesn't qualify me for finance either. And with current labor market prob not much chance to pivot.
But forced to pivot now from crypto due to regulations and macro.
I now mostly dislike crypto and don't think it's worth the career / political risk to bet on this industry for me. Likely a mistake getting into it for a career.
Career so far: Ran own online business (more like solo-preneur) for 2 yrs out of college, then sales and SMB consulting for 4yrs, then since 2021 crypto research at financial publishing firm for 1.5yrs, currently unemployed, scouting for a few VC funds on the side, and planning to apply to T15 MBA programs later this year.
Post MBA: Likely banking for 1-2 yrs for deal experience then either VC, could also come back to sales, raise a fund in future, or larger scale entrepreneurship than I've done in the past. SMB rollups, acquisition, who knows.
Or some big corporate roles and try to work my way up the ladder.
I was pretty naive in college. Parents are academics, immigrants, no business or connections, I did not know banking/m&a, biglaw existed. Had no idea about internships, did none, worked and did classes every summer.
Molded everything to med school, worked many jobs in undergrad. So many regrets.
Was going to be a doctor, have a stellar track record in undergrad with leadership and the whole shebang but decided post college not to apply and try my own thing instead.
Naively at the time, but in hindsight the experience makes me unique for MBA apps.
Wanting to build a real career, not interested in retiring anytime soon, but want real wealth one day too (>20-30M)
Have no desire to build online marketing agency or be a marketer etc like most internet guys do. No ecom.
A sellable business one day, sure, could be in the cards.
For now rather build a REAL career, more exposure to finance and business and see where it takes me... a mission.
People I look up to (lol): Chamath P (similar childhood), Munger, Dalio, Naveen Jain
Finances currently NW ~80K, 770 credit score. 300k in credit lines (don't use more than 15k). Liquid cash 160K mostly all in short term t bills currently. Renting only, monthly expenses 2.5k. Holding negligible crypto and equities (<15k total)
NW Goal: 5M+ by 40, or more. 2M by 35.
Not to fatFIRE. Not really trying to "retire," love the game (I'm young, what do I know).
Thoughts on this plan?
I know short term ROI wise MBA and banking is a huge setback and debt and poor time ROI but it's more about thinking in decades, non linear gains as a result, and what it exposes me to.
Plus the way I see it, for people like me who have no connections but hustle (immigrants), a top MBA is a ticket into the upper class if play cards right.
Even if have to take out 150k of debt for Wharton could be worth it for branding myself for a real career.
Suggestions on this plan?
Anyone here pivot to a top MBA and it was instrumental in your fatFIRE goals?

Hello, Reddit and all of those on here struggling through a mental illness. I am new here. In search of whatever may help in high hopes I can release myself from this prison.
Here's a background:
I have been both sexually and narcisstically abused, even learned to be the toxic, abuser. ( that part hurts my heart. ) As well as faced, occasional domestic violence and further into my adulthood physical abuse. I underwent Post Partum Psychosis, not so long ago. One Suicide attempt.
I have been diagnosed with: Major Depressive Disorder, Generalized Anxiety Disorder, PTSD and I also self- diagnose as a narcisstic, borderline.
The issue :
The majority of my life I am unsatisfied the majority of my life , I am too tired from the work it takes to keep trying to be balanced and normal. To keep putting in the effort or work to get better as I have come to the definite conclusion that this is just who I am now, and probably will be the rest of my life.
I have found myself in this "idle" state of mind, where I am here in the present but also in my own reality apart from this one.
I have been struggling forever with wanting to fit in and please everyone , while also realizing I just cannot. Me and the people just seem to be highly confused. Me being, complex, hypocritical, paradoxical and contradicting. I have a high self awareness of these things .
I also have this high sense of awareness when it comes to the choices I make and the several other opinions I might be getting from people but here is the direct thought line: I am me, I am not you You have your dislikes, likes, values, beliefs, opinions, trauma experiences in how they effected you throughout your life and how they made you think, and I have mine. You have your level of life you are on and I have mine, it does not have to be the same level. . That's all there is to it. I cannot think as you, act like you, or change for you and you probably wouldn't change for me, either . To some extent that has offered such relief when I go into thinking about it as such but it is also hell, when I realized that people expect these things. Your work, your effort, your showing them you love them by allowing yourself to give up such beliefs for them or anything else but I am highlighted individualistic. My own. To me Whether that's being social or anti-social. Whether that's being extroverted or introverted i am my own keeper. Im not one for compromises or ultimatums, not a firm believer in those Usually, in my time. I will be patient with myself on my growth, healing, relearning and self-discovery journey. Job or no job. I'm in the very middle between things, all things.
It's debilitating. All these expectations. What's next?

Hello,
Just wanted to share my experience as a current head of recruitment for a company. I am a team of one in charge of all staffing for our shop labor, HR, Project Management and everything in between. Our company does not use any ATS beyond excel, and posts on Indeed and LinkedIn. We did not have a recruitment process before I came in and we struggle with retention.
One of the biggest things I'm struggling to navigate is internal communication. We have lost so many candidates due to our CEO, or CFO CEO etc feeling the need to intervene with every interview or candidate. They want to see all resumes, all candidates, and I will schedule interviews for times on their calendar when they told me to, and when the candidate arrives be told their too busy right now and to reschedule.
It is very stressful, and I feel horrible for candidates. I also wonder if that is happening other places, where internal communication and disorganization is causing a huge negative blow to their recruitment process. Another frustrating thing is the disconnect from the modern world. If somebody has "jumped" jobs (Two in a one year time frame or stayed at a place for a year) they view that as a red flag and wont even entertain the idea of an interview. I am seeing all of it and could create an even larger thread with what i feel is happening in the industry. I am in the middle of it all and try to do as much as I can. I think communication is key, if anything i over communicate with all candidates.
I'm sorry for anyone who is currently searching for a job, and wish you all the best. Feel free to ask any questions.

Hello all Redditors, I'm a 2x CEO who was forced to close up shop in late parts of 2021 due to issues brought about by my partner whom had been doing nefarious things under our company name. My past companies were in biotech and intellectual property consulting. I have a bachelor's in mathematics from a fine school, and moved away from the area to a new place and have since got counseling for the absolutely insane story that ensued after discovering the wrong-doings mentioned and confronting the person. My partner was my father who held a lawyer and accounting license which is why I hadn't much thought he was capable of doing some of these things to people, let alone someone in his own family. Before that I worked developing companies from scratch and helping them achieve Pinksheets OTC status (have aided in more than 4 companies getting to this level) for public trading - preparing SEC form S-1's and advanced business plans including forecasting, industry statistics, and more. I also worked as Operations Manager for a solar company, lead information analyst and business developer at another agency, and my first job out of college was as a genetic sequencer for the AIDS genome working at the NCI (National Cancer Institute). Since moving, I've applied to LITERALLY over 1200 jobs on LinkedIn, Indeed, ZipRecruiter, and others, while also attempting to solicit jobs on Upwork and freelancer.com, all to no avail. I have gone to multiple job fairs, and had great interviews (3 of the 1200 jobs applied to). The area I live in has good prospects for engineers who have security clearances, but I am not applicable for security clearance because of a prescribed medication I take. I would like to be in a place where I feel comfortable starting another business, but at this point money is sparse and I need stable income. In the interviews I've had, the lower-level jobs tell me I'm far too over-qualified and some of the jobs I believed to be at my level want people who have been working specifically only in that job title for over 7 years (which seems obscene). I have been applying to statistics, data science, leadership roles, management, director, officer, and other positions, and I've gained huge experience since leaving my company in IT and software development, SEO, machine learning, and other essential tools for business development as well as becoming acquainted with cloud platforms, software languages, and data archetypes much more intensely. It is getting to a point after over a year without a position that I cannot reconcile why I am not able to get any responses and any time I ask for feedback, the recruiters say they don't have enough time to respond. I must be missing something because I've done everything suggested - from going to job fairs in person, to improving my skills in the meantime, to getting Harvard Course certifications, emailing recruiters directly, expanding my circle on LinkedIn and more. I'm more than halfway done with a mobile app I'm developing on Flutter for android and apple phones that I've been working on alone, and have two other company ideas that are generally in development, but will not be finished in the near future. It is becoming extremely disappointing after moving to a cheaper area already to have had no job the entire time. I've even posted tutoring services in the local area all over Facebook and so much more. I would prefer a remote position as it is something I'm more comfortable with, but have applied to in-person positions as well. Again, all I can conclude is I'm just missing something that other people understand, because countless days of research, performing quizzes for applications, and filling out job listing after job listing has left me with a feeling that seems personal at some level. I have googled my name and not found anything specific that would prevent me from getting a position either at or near the same level as before. I believe I'm extremely capable and apt to perform duties necessary for the jobs I apply to, but like I wrote as my title, I have to be doing something wrong in my process. Please advise.

Hello, I’m a 32 year old man from the Waco, TX area. I am Latino with black curly hair and brown eyes. 5’8” and 250 lbs but trying to lose it. Some of my interests are reading, pro wrestling, tv and movies, music, standup comedy, and woodworking.
I’m still a virgin due to some self confidence issues, social anxiety, and just generally not getting how people work. I also thought I might be asexual at some point but I’m obviously having some doubt.
I’d like to date and eventually settle down with someone but my lack of experience is a big mental hurdle for me and definitely causes me to act awkwardly around women. I also imagine that whomen my age would consider it a big red flag. I feel like the only way to get past that mental hurdle and gain some self confidence is to get some experience in pleasing a woman and know what I’m doing in bed.
I would like to meet an experienced woman interested in teaching and guiding me through my first time. I have no preference when it comes to age and women of all shapes and sizes are beautiful to me.
I can’t host but I can get a hotel and I’m willing to travel if we share a connection.

In the past year I applied for 6 jobs and got one interview. Last Tuesday I used GPT4 to tailor CVs & cover letters for 12 postings, and I already have 7 callbacks, 4 with interviews.
I nominate Sam Altman for supreme leader of the galaxy. That's all.
Edit: I should clarify the general workflow.

1. Read the job description, research the company, and decide if it's actually a good fit.
2. Copy & paste:
   
   1. " I'm going to show you a job description, my resume, and a cover letter. I want you to use the job description to change the resume and cover letter to match the job description."
   2. Job description
   3. Resume/CV
   4. Generic cover letter detailing career goals
3. Take the output, treat it as a rough draft, manually polish, and look for hallucinations.
   
4. Copy & paste:
   
   1. "I'm going to show you the job description and my resume/cover letter and give general feedback."
   2. The polished resume/cover letter
5. Repeat steps 3 and 4 until satisfied with the final product.
   

I've been trying to figure out how to use this guy in a team comp, and would appreciate some advice. I feel like for a long of the uses I'd want to slot him in, there's someone else who just does the job better.
As a DD player, I generally like bursting down dangerous fights and stalling easy fights, and usually if the dungeon goes well I get to the point where I have a pack with 0 torches and 0 food remaining, going in and out of hallways to spawn extra combats to farm antiques on. (I have an antiquarian on ~85% of my teams).
But Jester - I just have 2 of them sitting on my roster, barely having gotten any use.
What is he for? Is it for Battle Ballad? Stress healing? Bleed? Dance team support with dirk stab? Finale for boss fights? Is he better in Crimson Court?
Individually, running him just for Battle Ballad does not appeal to me. You don't have to run accuracy trinkets, which is objectively great early game since you don't have accuracy trinkets, but midgame (where I am currently) +3 trinket slots for -1 character? No thanks. So I would need some other upside.
For a stress healer, I've mostly made use of other options:
Crusader in my mind is the main competitor, as he can heal HP and torchlight, stun and deal Hellion damage to back ranks.
Hound master has better damage/bleed synergy, a rank 1-3 stun, a guard, a -prot debuff
Flagellant can help manage stress with suffer+endure+camping, though he's mostly stress heal support. Though since he's rank 1-2 he doesn't really conflict with Jester much. If I ran Flagellant more I might appreciate Jester more.
Arbalest is mainly a Vestal competitor imo, but she can torch and stress heal a little.
So what team comps does this guy fit into? How can I make good use of him?

Hello. I'm a 25 year old mom with a 2 year old. New to Lexington and Kentucky in general. I recently got an eviction notice from my landlord. I lost my job early last month and have not been able to get a new one yet or pay my rent.
Does anyone know how to get rental assistance without needing a court date? Community action council and most charities will only help once you have a court date set and I really don't want it to get to that point. It terrifies me.

Hello all Redditors, I'm a 2x CEO who was forced to close up shop in late parts of 2021 due to issues brought about by my partner whom had been doing nefarious things under our company name. My past companies were in biotech and intellectual property consulting. I have a bachelor's in mathematics from a fine school, and moved away from the area to a new place and have since got counseling for the absolutely insane story that ensued after discovering the wrong-doings mentioned and confronting the person. My partner was my father who held a lawyer and accounting license which is why I hadn't much thought he was capable of doing some of these things to people, let alone someone in his own family. Before that I worked developing companies from scratch and helping them achieve Pinksheets OTC status (have aided in more than 4 companies getting to this level) for public trading - preparing SEC form S-1's and advanced business plans including forecasting, industry statistics, and more. I also worked as Operations Manager for a solar company, lead information analyst and business developer at another agency, and my first job out of college was as a genetic sequencer for the AIDS genome working at the NCI (National Cancer Institute). Since moving, I've applied to LITERALLY over 1200 jobs on LinkedIn, Indeed, ZipRecruiter, and others, while also attempting to solicit jobs on Upwork and freelancer.com, all to no avail. I have gone to multiple job fairs, and had great interviews (3 of the 1200 jobs applied to). The area I live in has good prospects for engineers who have security clearances, but I am not applicable for security clearance because of a prescribed medication I take. I would like to be in a place where I feel comfortable starting another business, but at this point money is sparse and I need stable income. In the interviews I've had, the lower-level jobs tell me I'm far too over-qualified and some of the jobs I believed to be at my level want people who have been working specifically only in that job title for over 7 years (which seems obscene). I have been applying to statistics, data science, leadership roles, management, director, officer, and other positions, and I've gained huge experience since leaving my company in IT and software development, SEO, machine learning, and other essential tools for business development as well as becoming acquainted with cloud platforms, software languages, and data archetypes much more intensely. It is getting to a point after over a year without a position that I cannot reconcile why I am not able to get any responses and any time I ask for feedback, the recruiters say they don't have enough time to respond. I must be missing something because I've done everything suggested - from going to job fairs in person, to improving my skills in the meantime, to getting Harvard Course certifications, emailing recruiters directly, expanding my circle on LinkedIn and more. I'm more than halfway done with a mobile app I'm developing on Flutter for android and apple phones that I've been working on alone, and have two other company ideas that are generally in development, but will not be finished in the near future. It is becoming extremely disappointing after moving to a cheaper area already to have had no job the entire time. I've even posted tutoring services in the local area all over Facebook and so much more. I would prefer a remote position as it is something I'm more comfortable with, but have applied to in-person positions as well. Again, all I can conclude is I'm just missing something that other people understand, because countless days of research, performing quizzes for applications, and filling out job listing after job listing has left me with a feeling that seems personal at some level. I have googled my name and not found anything specific that would prevent me from getting a position either at or near the same level as before. I believe I'm extremely capable and apt to perform duties necessary for the jobs I apply to, but like I wrote as my title, I have to be doing something wrong in my process. Please advise.

Hello all Redditors, I'm a 2x CEO who was forced to close up shop in late parts of 2021 due to issues brought about by my partner whom had been doing nefarious things under our company name. My past companies were in biotech and intellectual property consulting. I have a bachelor's in mathematics from a fine school, and moved away from the area to a new place and have since got counseling for the absolutely insane story that ensued after discovering the wrong-doings mentioned and confronting the person. My partner was my father who held a lawyer and accounting license which is why I hadn't much thought he was capable of doing some of these things to people, let alone someone in his own family. Before that I worked developing companies from scratch and helping them achieve Pinksheets OTC status (have aided in more than 4 companies getting to this level) for public trading - preparing SEC form S-1's and advanced business plans including forecasting, industry statistics, and more. I also worked as Operations Manager for a solar company, lead information analyst and business developer at another agency, and my first job out of college was as a genetic sequencer for the AIDS genome working at the NCI (National Cancer Institute). Since moving, I've applied to LITERALLY over 1200 jobs on LinkedIn, Indeed, ZipRecruiter, and others, while also attempting to solicit jobs on Upwork and freelancer.com, all to no avail. I have gone to multiple job fairs, and had great interviews (3 of the 1200 jobs applied to). The area I live in has good prospects for engineers who have security clearances, but I am not applicable for security clearance because of a prescribed medication I take. I would like to be in a place where I feel comfortable starting another business, but at this point money is sparse and I need stable income. In the interviews I've had, the lower-level jobs tell me I'm far too over-qualified and some of the jobs I believed to be at my level want people who have been working specifically only in that job title for over 7 years (which seems obscene). I have been applying to statistics, data science, leadership roles, management, director, officer, and other positions, and I've gained huge experience since leaving my company in IT and software development, SEO, machine learning, and other essential tools for business development as well as becoming acquainted with cloud platforms, software languages, and data archetypes much more intensely. It is getting to a point after over a year without a position that I cannot reconcile why I am not able to get any responses and any time I ask for feedback, the recruiters say they don't have enough time to respond. I must be missing something because I've done everything suggested - from going to job fairs in person, to improving my skills in the meantime, to getting Harvard Course certifications, emailing recruiters directly, expanding my circle on LinkedIn and more. I'm more than halfway done with a mobile app I'm developing on Flutter for android and apple phones that I've been working on alone, and have two other company ideas that are generally in development, but will not be finished in the near future. It is becoming extremely disappointing after moving to a cheaper area already to have had no job the entire time. I've even posted tutoring services in the local area all over Facebook and so much more. I would prefer a remote position as it is something I'm more comfortable with, but have applied to in-person positions as well. Again, all I can conclude is I'm just missing something that other people understand, because countless days of research, performing quizzes for applications, and filling out job listing after job listing has left me with a feeling that seems personal at some level. I have googled my name and not found anything specific that would prevent me from getting a position either at or near the same level as before. I believe I'm extremely capable and apt to perform duties necessary for the jobs I apply to, but like I wrote as my title, I have to be doing something wrong in my process. Please advise.

I heard him make this argument against remote work, that your employer may instead outsource your job to India for less money if you don’t return to the office.
What I can’t understand is that if my job can be outsourced to India and save the company money, why wouldn’t they do that already. Very few companies hire local people to support the local economy – they want the cheapest labor possible.
This feels like a strawman argument because I can’t understand how sitting in an office makes you safe from cheaper outsourcing if you work a job that can be done from home. My guess is the real reason this doesn’t happen are language barriers, time zone barriers, employment law/tax barriers, cultural barriers, etc.
Am I missing something though to make sense of his argument?

Hey all. I've been applying to jobs for the last year; I graduated a month ago with a 3.7 GPA in Business Admin / Information Systems. Despite my best efforts and some interviews at some good places, I graduated without any corporate internships Sophomore and Junior year, even trying to apply for some during my Senior year, to no luck. Despite that, I kept working on extracurriculars and applying to other places. I've applied to about 600 or so places so far just this year and have heard nothing.
All my resume has is me working front desk jobs because that's all I could get, and extracurriculars that should be related to what I'm applying for, but are worthless according to the general knowledge here (TAing multiple classes, case competitions, being a member of my school's consulting e-board). I have had so many appointments with my school's career center, just for them to tell me that my resume looks fine and that I should have no trouble getting a job and to just keep applying / networking all that stuff. But therein lies the issue.
My network is full of people in companies like Bain, McKinsey, Citi, or Goldman where my resume will get tossed out even with a reference because I don't have a corporate internship, so I don't even bother; the others who aren't in companies like those are in jobs that are too specialized for me to qualify (CPA requirements, which I don't qualify for because of the credit requirement). I don't quite go to an elite college (I couldn't afford to go to one), the strongest network I have to leverage is from my prestigious, close-knit high school. My college is a decent one, but there's the feast or famine nature where people got jobs at prestigious firms... or they didn't get any at all. So it's not like I'm a harvard student who will automatically pass a resume screening or impress an HR person just by having read that on their resume.
I've tried just about everything; recruiters would message me to apply to their companies all the time while I was in school just to ghost me when I did apply. At this point I'm desperate and applying to literally any posting that will take my resume. I don't even apply to anything that has a salary over $60k to take less-wanted positions (they all require people with 4+ years in industry for god-knows-what-reason, so I don’t apply). I try messaging any recruiter on LinkedIn (linkedin premium!) that I could find for the company after applying to a job, and if I can find one, to no avail.

When we found out that we were having twins it’s safe to say I was pretty freaked out, I genuinely thought questioned whether going ahead with the pregnancy was the right thing to do. 5 weeks in and it’s definitely better than I expected! Our twins got to 37 weeks, are healthy and growing and we are getting some sleep (not loads! But some!) it is definitely hard work, it’s a whole other ball game compared to singleton parenting. I miss the freedom of just having one - I feel like Ive forgotten how to leave the house, it takes us hours, but we are making it work.
The thing that I didn’t expect and the thing that feels like I don’t have a solution to is getting past the basic keeping them alive stage. With one we spent so much time together and I was so responsive to her needs that I felt really strongly bonded to her, and like I had a sense of her personality and identity pretty early on. Twin parenting feels like firefighting. I like the girls but I don’t know if we really have that ‘bond’ yet and I don’t know how it will come. There’s half the amount of time and attention to go around (not even counting our demanding 3 year old) and if a baby is content, asleep or awake and not crying they are generally being put down to tend to the one who is in need of feeding/burping/changing etc. I also feel like I’m not doing the best job of looking after them beyond meeting their basic needs - tummy time? Extra stimulation? Playing games and singing songs? None of that is happening.
Is it normal not to feel super connected to twins? I’m not sad or anxious, I don’t think it’s a PPD problem… I just think I’m looking after these babies rather then falling in love with them. Will that change?? I really hope so.

First time posting here - not totally sure it applies - ha - but an earlier post reminded me of this situation I was in a few years back, so thought I'd share.
I was a 20+ employee for an organization with religious ties, in leadership, and the key point person for a lot of things, and pretty good at what I did. There were parts of the organization's religious group's identity that I didn't personally identify with, but felt as though I was making a difference there, generally enjoyed the work, and knew plenty of other like-minded (read "what the org would have called 'liberal') employees there, so I was content.
In my state, this organization's religious ties make them exempt from several laws - most relevant to this story, they are legally allowed to make hiring decisions based on/considering sexuality/sexual identity. While the organization had many constituents who were a part of the LBGTQIA+ community, and supported those constituents, they did not openly hire members of the LBGTQIA+ community. For years, I felt like a part of my reason for being there was to be a support to those members of the LBGTQIA+ community who were constituents in what was not always a positive environment for them.
I had an employee who was an outstanding performer - really, she was my BEST employee, if I'm being honest. She was a standard-setter in every way - an absolute peak performer. I had no plans to leave, but if I had plans to leave, I would have recommended her as a successor immediately. The work she did was important and wide-spread - it impacted every constituent in the org in one way or another. She was closeted when hired, and through a series of life events, came out after several years working for me. I was actually surprised at the community response - there were some skeptical folks and people who did the common religious "praying for you" thing, but many people were supportive of her.
We lived in that bubble for a couple of years, and then I took a plan to the supervisor of my direct supervisor (she made the salary/title decisions) to promote this employee for her exemplary work. The conversation started off poorly, and ended with "...do we really want to encourage her to stay here?" and "She knew the type of environment she was working in when she took the job - if she disagrees now, she should leave."
I knew, in that moment, that boss's boss was inadvertently speaking to me - I don't agree...I should leave.
I started the job hunt with one main criteria, found a place that was openly affirming with work that I was eager to learn, and took the job. It's ended up being an incredible fit for me - I love the work, love the people, and - surprise - members of the LBGTQIA+ community can both work here AND be promoted. I also ended up with a 20% pay increase during my first year, which was wild.
While my departure certainly didn't ruin anyone's life, everyone was pretty surprised with my departure, I definitely got my share of panicked "how did you complete this task?!" or "what was this procedure?!" calls, and they haven't been able to fill the role since.
Anyway - cheers to finding a workplace that's in alignment with your soul!!

Greetings chromeos,
Recently, Reddit has announced some changes to their API that may have pretty serious impact on many of it's users.
You may have already seen quite a few posts like these across some of the other subreddits that you browse, so we're just going to cut to the chase.
What's Happening

• Third Party Reddit apps (such as Apollo, Reddit is Fun and others) are going to become ludicrously more expensive for it's developers to run, which will in turn either kill the apps, or result in a monthly fee to the users if they choose to use one of those apps to browse. Put simply, each request to Reddit within these mobile apps will cost the developer money. The developers of Apollo were quoted around $2 million per month for the current rate of usage. The only way for these apps to continue to be viable for the developer is if you (the user) pay a monthly fee, and realistically, this is most likely going to just outright kill them. Put simply: If you use a third party app to browse Reddit, you will most likely no longer be able to do so, or be charged a monthly fee to keep it viable.
  
  • A big reason this matters to chromeos, and why we believe it matters to you is a non-negligible portion of our user base being forced to change the way they browse Reddit.
  • Some people with visual impairments have problems using the official mobile app, and the removal of third-party apps may significantly hinder their ability to browse Reddit in general. More info
  • Many moderators are going to be significantly hindered from moderating their communities because 3rd party mobile apps provide mod tools that the official app doesn't support. This means longer wait times on post approvals, reports, modmails etc.
• NSFW Content is no longer going to be available in the API. This means that, even if 3rd party apps continue to survive, or even if you pay a fee to use a 3rd party app, you will not be able to access NSFW content on it. You will only be able to access it on the official Reddit app. Additionally, some service bots (such as video downloaders or maybe remindme bots) will not be able to access anything NSFW. In more major cases, it may become harder for moderators of NSFW subreddits to combat serious violations such as CSAM due to certain mod tools being restricted from accessing NSFW content.
  

Note: A lot of this has been sourced and inspired from a fantastic mod-post on wow, they do a great job going in-depth on the entire situation. Major props to the team over there! You can read their post here
Open Letter to Reddit & Blackout
In lieu of what's happening above, an open letter has been released by the broader moderation community, and chromeos will be supporting it.
Part of this initiative includes a potential subreddit blackout (meaning, the subreddit will be privatized) on June 12th, lasting 24-48 hours or longer. This hopefully will make enough of an impact to influence Reddit to change their minds on this.
Cheers,
The chromeos Moderation Team

I have an extra ticket to the Houston show tonight if anyone is interested!! Let me know :)

PLEASE HELP- I know the following is long, but if you have the time and any experience that can help, SOLIDARITY NEEDED!
I am a minimum wage deli employee and a struggling parent living paycheck to paycheck in rural California, where I moved after covid wrecked my life as I knew it. In April, I became the president of our union.
Our union board consists of 3 positions: President, Vice President, and Secretary-Treasurer. Myself and the Sec-Treas ran unopposed at the same time as a result of the past President quitting the company and resigning, and the Sec-Treas stepping down in turn. When we ran, it was with idealistic hopes, and zero knowledge of the can of worms we were opening.
"The Union" serves only the chain of small grocery stores that I work for- which I'll call "The Company".
The Company has made their business model on grocery stores in small, rural areas where job options are limited. Employees end up accepting extremely low wages and poor working conditions in exchange for a job close to their homes.
In the 70s and 80s, more store chains were a part of the union, but they went out of business, leaving only The Company included in the union. My understanding was during those prior decades before unions were gutted by federal legislation, it was a pretty good union.
Over time, The Company has found ways to largely control the union.
Unhappy employees with terrible work conditions and pay have formed a terrible impression of the union- the general belief is the union is "fake" or a joke and just something to take money from their checks. So, participation is low and they struggle to fill Union Rep and Board positions.
As a result The Company is actively involved in recruiting reps/board members, and recruiting these loyal employees willing to go the extra mile has seemingly worked out in their favor. It seems like the past board members have not held ground, and have ceded valuable rights to company pressure.
Past bargain negotiations have only handed things away to The Company. Benefits that I know have been taken away in recent contract negotiations include PTO for part-timers, and bonuses for non-management employees (store and department managers still receive profit-based bonuses). We have no record and no idea of what these things may have been ceded in exchange for.
At this point, all that union due are being spent on are Christmas parties, 3 $100 "Employee-appreciation lunches", and monthly "birthday parties" of $35/store with cookies or cakes for all employees. This is IF the union rep has been able to make these things happen. We strongly feel these are all things the company should be paying for, but the union has done it historically and the parties are apparently super popular in the stores that actually have them.
When we took on this huge responsibility, it was in hopes we could make some noticeable change that will benefit our deeply struggling coworkers.
However, since taking over I have found myself in a bureaucratic nightmare- issues with the bank, unpaid invoices, messy accounting, an unreconciled bank account, and the like. I do have a history as a bookkeeper, so it's doable, but nightmarishly time consuming and not at all in line with the main goal of negotiating a more favorable contract.
Updated Contract is due 7/31/23, rapidly approaching. Our meeting with The Company (the owners) is June 15.
Per the 1975 union constitution, the President holds the sole bargaining power with the employer.
We have held a meeting with the union reps, and gathered their feedback on things they'd like to see change.
Unilateral feedback is that NONE of the 14 stores has a sufficient breakroom (all have been jerry-rigged from closets, rafter storage, warehouse, or safe room, lacking AC, privacy, on-camera, in customer area, no filtered water-dispenser, etc. etc). Not sure if this is an issue for contract negotiation, or some other route?
The contact items we are looking to improve are,
(1) Safety- currently all that's in this section is that safety rules be posted and the store have ONE first-aid kit always accessible. Mind you, these are big grocery stores with many departments- not always reasonable to run across the store to a first aid kit when an employee is bleeding. At our store alone there have been repeated, repeated injuries from many of the same hazards that have gone unaddressed. Currently there is a company policy that store managers must complete a monthly safety check and keep these noted in a binder (I've been told this is also state law, but have been unable to find this info). We want to add this process to our contract, including requirements to address these hazards, so we have some leverage when the manager fails to do so.
(2) 15 minute breaks. We are currently only allotted 10 minute breaks, and this is way too short for cashiers to go to the bathroom and also rest. Many California grocery stores have 15 minute breaks so we think this should be reasonable.
(3) Clock-in/Out grace periods. This has been an issue for our employees, and there have been incidents where the company has chosen to terminate employments for being <5min late- only in certain incidences where they wanted to fire the employee anyway and needed a reason. Other employees consistently get away with it.
(4) Bonuses for non-management- this is something we lost, and it would be amazing to get back but feels like such a huge item that was given away, and it seems almost impossible they'll ever give back. Any advice for trying for this one would be extremely welcome.
Wage negotiation is a separate event which will happen in August.
We have ideas for what we want, but have been told the owners we will be meeting with will come prepared with the lawyer-prepared contract they want, try to take everything they can, intimidate, and cede nothing.
I have zero experience with bargaining, and am not sure even what format my proposed changes should be in.
I was willing to spend emergency funds on contract advise, so I reached out to three law firms for advice, but received no response.
I am massively in need of help, any info or advice would be deeply appreciated.